Say What?: Commercials That Made Us Scratch Our Heads

[Cobalt Stargazer]

4 hours ago, absolutqt said:

So there is a Stella Artois ad that ran frequently this past weekend and it begins with someone counting in French---un, deux, trois...but I swear, I don't hear "trois" I hear, "twat." Every. Single. Time.  I can't be the only one.

If you were, you aren't now.

[theatremouse]

3 hours ago, mojoween said:

Putting aside the fact that "the place where Coke tastes so good" is actually an imaginary place because Coke is sewage, am I supposed to know exactly which place they are talking about?  Or do I just wander around to random restaurants asking if they are selling Coke for a buck?

There are a few ways they're expecting you to know:

1) McDonald's radio ads currently just plain say explicitly all size Cokes $1 for a limited time. I heard the radio spots before I ever saw the Mindy TV ad.

2) The commercial is color-coded (the background+her outfit are supposed to insinuate whose ad it is).

3) Apparently there is some sort of, not meme exactly, but I donno...urban myth? I don't know what to call it but a thing whereby certain subsets of people insist Coke from McDonald's tastes better than from a bottle, or a can, or any other restaurant's fountain. So if you're familiar with that schtick, the ad itself is a clue.

But I also think to an extent they're doing that annoying thing where they trick people into googling shit. It's almost like the BK alexa ad except instead of trying to trigger a device to do it, they're just trying to get humans to go google it themselves, and then in theory come across pages upon pages of stuff about #3.

[mojoween]

Huh.  I never would have come up with any of that, and I sure as shit wasn't going to google it!  I appreciate your information.

[amass]

the reason why coke tastes different at Mcdonalds is because they get it delivered in stainless containers (most places get it in plastic bags inside cardboard)

they keep the coke at a colder temp than most places (and the syrup ratio is meant to account for melting ice so it doesn't taste watered down)

and they serve it with a wider straw.

 

I won't say if it's "better" because a) i'm not a coke fan and b) I don't eat at Mcdonalds... but those things would make it taste different for sure. And people do swear it tastes better there....

[friendperidot]

"I am the addiction network." What? A network is the one fake doctor who does the commercial? Later, he intones something about things that could happen, "you could die or worse..." I think, "or you could live." But he goes on about "hurting other people". As a person who has lived with addiction in my family, boyfriends and ex husband for most of my life, death of the addict may be a relief, there will also be grief, guilt, anger, but there is a relief. And sometimes for the addict, living with the addiction is worse than death, so many have a death wish, they are tired of fighting, they can't deal, and feel death would be a relief. And as someone who has lived with addiction in my family, boyfriends and ex husband, you are going to be hurt, sometimes physically, and sometimes that is the least of the hurt caused by addiction.

Am I in a pissy mood because of addiction in the house I live in? Hell yes. I am also working on my anger, frustration. I really don't have a lot of guilt about things, I've already done that, I'm beyond feeling guilty about what someone else does to themselves. It may not be "detaching with love" as suggested by Al-Anon, but it is detaching, maybe the love will come back one day, but that day doesn't appear to be today. It's one day at a time.

[spiderpig]

As someone who cut her teeth in advertising during the Mad Men era, the cardinal rule for commercials was:

You can be as clever as you want, but it's crap if no one remembers the product.

With that in mind, isn't that Jeffrey Wright (fantastic actor, most recently in Westworld) doing a spot for.............

.....um.......

It's on all the time and have no idea what he's pitching.

(OK, I broke down and Googled - it's Dell, but the product association is nil, at least with this viewer.)

[Sandman87]

On Wednesday, April 19, 2017 at 10:30 AM, amass said:

...and they serve it with a wider straw.

I hate their straws btw. One ends up sucking more air and less beverage.

[Prevailing Wind]

I ate at an Italian place once that gave out, as straws, hollow pasta. It was like a spaghetti on steroids, hollow in the middle. Half-way through your beverage, the damn thing got limp & non-functional.  Ted's Montana Grill still uses paper straws. I prefer that to a wet noodle.

[peacheslatour]

"Dairy Teens". Really? REALLY??

[Sandman87]

The people who make Linzess need to enunciate a little more clearly in their ad. It sounds to me like they're saying L'incest, which makes me wonder how well it's selling in the French speaking parts of Canada.

 

3 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

"Dairy Teens". Really? REALLY??

I have no idea which commercial you're referring to, but it sounds like some sort of porn.

[peacheslatour]

14 hours ago, Sandman87 said:

The people who make Linzess need to enunciate a little more clearly in their ad. It sounds to me like they're saying L'incest, which makes me wonder how well it's selling in the French speaking parts of Canada.

 

I have no idea which commercial you're referring to, but it sounds like some sort of porn.

It's a Dairy Queen commercial and the manager address's the employees as "dairy teens".

[Jamoche]

6 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

It's a Dairy Queen commercial and the manager address's the employees as "dairy teens".

Has there ever been a place that used cutesy names for its employees where the job conditions didn't suck?

[bilgistic]

I'm reminded of this "Inside Amy Schumer" sketch. (If you hate her, just skip this post.)

[Brattinella]

36 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

I'm reminded of this "Inside Amy Schumer" sketch. (If you hate her, just skip this post.)

I will, thanks!

[Sandman87]

Consider it skipped. Always.

[peacheslatour]

4 hours ago, Jamoche said:

Has there ever been a place that used cutesy names for its employees where the job conditions didn't suck?

Oh, you know it.

[ennui]

Apparently, this was a SuperBowl commercial but I saw it for the first time today (I guess I watch all the wrong programs). Anyway, Aflac, surgeon says "we're just going to make a little incision and remove your 1967 Corvette," (because he doesn't have Aflac and will have to sell his "sweet little muscle machine" to pay the bills). I know some Corvette people, maybe that's why it tickled me. It's funny, but then the ending is offensive, where she's making fun of the unconscious patient; not sure what they were thinking.

https://www.ispot.tv/ad/A33a/aflac-super-bowl-2017-surgery

Edited April 25, 2017 by ennui

[Moose135]

The ending made me laugh, I guess I'm funny that way.  And a 1967 Corvette, if it's in good condition, isn't just a "50-year old car", it will be worth quite a few bucks...

[Jaded]

Ack....Nothing to see here...Off to the annoying commercial thread.

Edited April 25, 2017 by Jaded

[ennui]

n/m

Edited April 25, 2017 by ennui

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Woman in Liberty Mutual ad: "Liberty Mutual stood by me when this guy got a flat tire." *indicates her boyfriend/husband who is standing next to her*

I am fully aware that what she means is that her boyfriend/husband's car got a flat tire, but the wording initially confuses me every time, leaving me wondering exactly how a person gets a flat.

[Silver Raven]

5 minutes ago, Cobalt Stargazer said:

Woman in Liberty Mutual ad: "Liberty Mutual stood by me when this guy got a flat tire." *indicates her boyfriend/husband who is standing next to her*

I think that's her son.

[Bastet]

5 minutes ago, Silver Raven said:

I think that's her son.

If it's the commercial where their situation is contrasted with another family, whose insurance plan doesn't cover changing a flat in the middle of the night (24/7 roadside assistance), yes, that's her son.

[Ubiquitous]

11 hours ago, Cobalt Stargazer said:

Woman in Liberty Mutual ad: "Liberty Mutual stood by me when this guy got a flat tire." *indicates her boyfriend/husband who is standing next to her*

I am fully aware that what she means is that her boyfriend/husband's car got a flat tire, but the wording initially confuses me every time, leaving me wondering exactly how a person gets a flat.

If memory serves, that's when  someone is following you too closely and steps on the heel of your sneaker, causing your foot to pop out.

 

I haven't seen this one in circulation for awhile, but there's this one that begins "He likes stuff from the microwave, but she likes things from the forest..." that sounds nonsensical.

[Jamoche]

1 hour ago, Ubiquitous said:

I haven't seen this one in circulation for awhile, but there's this one that begins "He likes stuff from the microwave, but she likes things from the forest..." that sounds nonsensical.

I'm picturing a California stereotype, eating nuts and random mushrooms straight from the ground.

I've got AAA for roadside assistance; somehow I doubt an insurance company has their connections to tow trucks in every small town in the country.

[Prevailing Wind]

When I first got Progressive, I signed up for the Roadside Assistance. Turns out, they're closed on Sunday.  I no longer trust RA from an insurance company.

[ennui]

45 minutes ago, Jamoche said:

I've got AAA for roadside assistance; somehow I doubt an insurance company has their connections to tow trucks in every small town in the country.

When I had roadside assistance through a previous insurance company, I called whichever tow service I wanted, and I was reimbursed for the cost (which meant I had to pay for the service and submit the receipt). I prefer AAA, let them assume the responsibility.

Edited April 28, 2017 by ennui

[friendperidot]

I have an ear infection, so I may not have heard correctly, but just heard an ad during American Greed on Escape, for a home online shopping service for large people, I swear I heard the company name as "Fat Asses". I hope I was hearing wrong.

[ennui]

On 3/31/2017 at 6:18 PM, janie jones said:

But when you're near them, you'll smell the smell of their laundry detergent on their clothes.  (I'm not saying it isn't dumb.)

I keep seeing this at the top of the page ... I recall an ex-BF who said that women use the scent of dryer sheets to mark their territory.

[janie jones]

Heh, I wouldn't even use dryer sheets if my husband didn't like them.

[Sandman87]

10 hours ago, Ubiquitous said:

I haven't seen this one in circulation for awhile, but there's this one that begins "He likes stuff from the microwave, but she likes things from the forest..." that sounds nonsensical.

 

8 hours ago, Jamoche said:

I'm picturing a California stereotype, eating nuts and random mushrooms straight from the ground.

I'm picturing someone doing their grocery shopping Ted Nugent style, with a hunting bow.

[BubblingKettle]

On 4/28/2017 at 5:17 PM, friendperidot said:

I have an ear infection, so I may not have heard correctly, but just heard an ad during American Greed on Escape, for a home online shopping service for large people, I swear I heard the company name as "Fat Asses". I hope I was hearing wrong.

Lol -- that would be quite the marketing strategy. Maybe it was The Maximus Box? Maximus might sound a little like Fat Asses when you have an infected ear. That's one of those shopping services for big & tall men.

[xaxat]

Huh. Maybe dad should have worked on that repayment plan before she signed the lease on that sweet downtown loft with the twelve foot ceilings.

[Ubiquitous]

I repeatedly saw an ad with Sylvester Stallone mumbling something to a guy with a black eye before handing him a steak and the other mumbling something and tossing it onto a grill. I have no clue what they are saying!

[docmatt]

2 hours ago, Ubiquitous said:

I repeatedly saw an ad with Sylvester Stallone mumbling something to a guy with a black eye before handing him a steak and the other mumbling something and tossing it onto a grill. I have no clue what they are saying!

Stallone says "be bold" The other guy (Canelo Alvarez, boxer from Mexico) throws it on the grill and says "be bolder". 

[Amethyst]

This one isn't really puzzling, just creepy.  

[bilgistic]

Anthropomorphized child-sized teddy bears are a no go for me. I don't care if they're shilling cakes "healthy treats". That is nightmare fuel akin to the clown in Poltergeist.

[Brattinella]

42 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

Anthropomorphized child-sized teddy bears are a no go for me. I don't care if they're shilling cakes "healthy treats". That is nightmare fuel akin to the clown in Poltergeist.

I KNOW!  *shudders*

[peacheslatour]

12 hours ago, bilgistic said:

Anthropomorphized child-sized teddy bears are a no go for me. I don't care if they're shilling cakes "healthy treats". That is nightmare fuel akin to the clown in Poltergeist.

But they're "healthy" because they contain eggs, flour and milk (and sugar, tons of sugar). Gee, just like any other baked good up to and including donuts, chocolate cake, cookies...

[Jamoche]

Somewhere someone commented that maybe the Xyzal slogan "be wise all" isn't quite as linguistically weird as it seems, that there's a comma in there they're just not making obvious enough. Well, now the slogan gets written on their ads, and nope, no comma.

I'm guessing the slogan didn't come from the ad department, it came from some upper manager who thought it was clever because it rhymes.

[Prevailing Wind]

Who buys all the Xyxal? Wise Paul and his small-size ball. He's headin' for a prize fall.

[ennui]

Hand held air compressor: "With the Air Hawk, flat balls are no longer a problem." I'm not normally 12, but that caught my attention.

[mojoween]

Ok so I don't really need a full-on anatomy lesson, but I am curious anyways.

While I can kinda sorta understand that if you have a malodorous waft going on down there and you're doing yoga, Summer's Eve might help if you're into that sort of thing.

But what do thongs and skinny jeans have to do with the equation?

[riley702]

Cue up Who Let the Smell Out? I'm being a smartass; that's just a guess.

Edited May 11, 2017 by riley702

[ennui]

15 hours ago, mojoween said:

But what do thongs and skinny jeans have to do with the equation?

Sweat and lack of air circulation, is my guess. As opposed to cotton panties and floaty dresses.

[peacheslatour]

4 minutes ago, ennui said:

Sweat and lack of air circulation, is my guess. As opposed to cotton panties and floaty dresses.

Or no panties! :)

[Sandman87]

On Sunday, May 07, 2017 at 11:22 AM, docmatt said:

Stallone says "be bold" The other guy (Canelo Alvarez, boxer from Mexico) throws it on the grill and says "be bolder". 

The point of that (for those who don't already know) is that the old fashioned treatment for a black eye is to use a steak as a cold compress to reduce the swelling. Stallone is basically saying "Here, use this for your eye instead of grilling it", and Alvarez's response is essentially "I'll suck up the pain and eat the steak instead. Because I'm bold."

Incidentally, this makes Stallone an idiot, because getting blood and bacteria from uncooked beef in your eye is a really bad idea.

 

Quote

Hand held air compressor: "With the Air Hawk, flat balls are no longer a problem." I'm not normally 12, but that caught my attention.

Reminds me of the Robot Chicken sketch with a distraught P.E. teacher exclaiming "Oh, my balls! My balls! Who could have done this to my balls!?"

Edited May 12, 2017 by Sandman87

[smittykins]

Or the anti-steroid PSA with the deflating balls.

ETA:

Edited May 12, 2017 by smittykins
add video

[ennui]

13 hours ago, Sandman87 said:

Incidentally, this makes Stallone an idiot, because getting blood and bacteria from uncooked beef in your eye is a really bad idea.

I think the usage of steak for a black eye came about because the steak would be cold. Another home remedy is to use frozen peas as an ice pack. 

The Progressive commercials mimicking soap operas make me laugh. "I stood by you when you had amnesia!" "You know I can't remember that!" and then Susan Lucci comes down the stairs. 

[Silver Raven]

All of those Susan Lucci ads are hilarious.  "I was in a coma, too."  "It was a nap, Susan Lucci."