Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"

[ari333]

9 hours ago, forumfish said:

Hee! I shall have to enforce a no-fly zone!

The part where you said, "the old man in my house" struck me as so funny. I was asking, "Who is he?" I read like - some dude who is rolling thru causing havoc in his wake? :-)

[Sandman87]

On Wednesday, February 15, 2017 at 7:51 PM, forumfish said:

The old man in my house swings his arms as he walks, paying no attention to anything in his path.

"The old man in my house" sounds like there's a gnome living in the wainscoting.

[ari333]

5 hours ago, Sandman87 said:

"The old man in my house" sounds like there's a gnome living in the wainscoting.

HEE.  :-)

[Bastet]

The programmable signs Cal-Trans put on the freeway today read, "Rain May Cause Flooding.  Be Caution." 

Not "Be Cautious," or "Use Caution," but "Be Caution." 

Okay.

[JTMacc99]

7 hours ago, Bastet said:

The programmable signs Cal-Trans put on the freeway today read, "Rain May Cause Flooding.  Be Caution." 

Not "Be Cautious," or "Use Caution," but "Be Caution." 

Okay.

It's so bad that everyone needs to BE caution itself. Be one with caution people is the message. 

Or it's a typo. 

[ParadoxLost]

10 hours ago, Bastet said:

The programmable signs Cal-Trans put on the freeway today read, "Rain May Cause Flooding.  Be Caution." 

Not "Be Cautious," or "Use Caution," but "Be Caution." 

Okay.

Do you think they got the idea to "Be Caution" from Zen or Caddyshack ("Be the Ball")?

[ari333]

12 hours ago, Bastet said:

The programmable signs Cal-Trans put on the freeway today read, "Rain May Cause Flooding.  Be Caution." 

Not "Be Cautious," or "Use Caution," but "Be Caution." 

Okay.

Sorry I keep quoting Brian Regan, but he is a favorite.

There was some bit he does about seeing writing on the side of a truck. "We speak English and we deliverS"

There was another one about a truck  with a slogan on the side or a business. The name was,   "Fiddler Roofing."

He said, "how can they NOT say, 'Fiddler on the Roof?' " :-)

[zxy556575]

I sometimes watch TV episodes online via the network's own site. Many include commercials. I understand why they're unskippable and why they make me disable my ad-blocker.

But why must they then show the same 3-4 ads over and over?

[Splishy Splashy]

One or really Two of my Pet Peeves are huge in my High School and I see this shit going on everyday and it makes me so mad. That is bullying and slut shaming. There really isn't a day of school that goes by that I don't see someone getting picked on because they may be smaller than someone else or guys making rumors about doing something with a certain girl. The really sad thing is when I or my friends speak up against these bullies we get laughed at and even sometimes than also made rumors about as well. The Teachers and Administration I guess have tried, but when it is happening almost everyday it is hard to completely stop. I guess for me being a Senior and only having a few month left that is good, but something really has to be done about this shit.

[Bastet]

Splishy Splashy, have you seen the movie Easy A?  It's very funny, with terrifically biting social commentary on several issues, particularly the bullshit leveled at high school girls who've had (or who are rumored to have had) sex.

The behavior you describe is a serious problem, and I despair that it seems to have become worse (in terms of being easier to engage in and disseminate, thanks to text messaging, cell phone cameras, and social media) than it was when I was your age (many, many moons ago).  There are some great documentaries and articles on the subject, highlighting how pervasive and destructive it is and discussing ways of addressing it, but it's also good to sometimes sit back and sort of share a knowing laugh with fictional characters about how utterly fucked up it is.

Edited February 19, 2017 by Bastet

[ari333]

19 minutes ago, Bastet said:

Splishy Splashy, have you seen the movie Easy A?  It's very funny, with terrifically biting social commentary on several issues, particularly the bullshit leveled at high school girls who've had (or who are rumored to have had) sex.

The behavior you describe is a serious problem, and I despair that it seems to have become worse (in terms of being easier to engage in and disseminate, thanks to social media) than it was when I was your age (many, many moons ago).  There are some great documentaries and articles on the subject, highlighting how pervasive and destructive it is and discussing ways of addressing it, but it's also good to sometimes sit back and sort of share a knowing laugh with fictional characters about how utterly fucked up it is.

THIS ^^^^

"utterly fucked up" -- nailed it

[Angeltoes]

I am thankful that I went to high school in the old days when there was no social media.  These same things that Splishy Spashy speaks of went on in our day but it seems worse now.

In my senior year, someone found a note in the hall (do teenagers still write notes to each other now or is all personal communication done with phones?) which was written from one best friend to the other and the note suggested that they were a bit more than friends, if you catch my drift.  That note got passed all over the place and eventually I saw it.  I didn't know either girl and thought the whole thing was dumb, so I just threw the note away.  Eventually everybody who read it got called down to the Dean's office one by one (Mary came in and said,"I gave it to Sue" then Sue got called in from class and she said,"I gave it to Lisa", and so on) because the girl who wrote it was in tears over it.  That girl was in the office and I've never seen anyone looked more relieved than her when I said that I'd thrown it away.  I heard that it destroyed the friendship between the two girls.  There'd be a lot less pain in the world if people would just mind their own business.

Although I was pleased the other day when I tested myself to see if I remembered how to fold a note into a triangle and it worked.   Yet I can never remember where my car keys are.

[Splishy Splashy]

33 minutes ago, Angeltoes said:

34 minutes ago, Angeltoes said:

I am thankful that I went to high school in the old days when there was no social media.  These same things that Splishy Spashy speaks of went on in our day but it seems worse now.

In my senior year, someone found a note in the hall (do teenagers still write notes to each other now or is all personal communication done with phones?) which was written from one best friend to the other and the note suggested that they were a bit more than friends, if you catch my drift.  That note got passed all over the place and eventually I saw it.  I didn't know either girl and thought the whole thing was dumb, so I just threw the note away.  Eventually everybody who read it got called down to the Dean's office one by one (Mary came in and said,"I gave it to Sue" then Sue got called in from class and she said,"I gave it to Lisa", and so on) because the girl who wrote it was in tears over it.  That girl was in the office and I've never seen anyone looked more relieved than her when I said that I'd thrown it away.  I heard that it destroyed the friendship between the two girls.  There'd be a lot less pain in the world if people would just mind their own business.

Although I was pleased the other day when I tested myself to see if I remembered how to fold a note into a triangle and it worked.   Yet I can never remember where my car keys are.

Yes pretty much everything goes on by texts on phones even though we are not allowed to use our phones during school hours except on lunch period. We sneak out our phones all the time though. This sort of shit occurs almost everyday and you are right it is stupid. The biggest day is Monday after the weekend when rumors of weekend party happenings run wild and most of it is not true. I pretty much ignore it unless it really annoys me than I start to bitch about it and people hear about it. Most of it is petty though, but the stuff that becomes really personal and hurtful to someone is when I can't help myself to get involved in someway. I don't like seeing innocent people getting hurt by trash.

1 hour ago, Bastet said:

Splishy Splashy, have you seen the movie Easy A?  It's very funny, with terrifically biting social commentary on several issues, particularly the bullshit leveled at high school girls who've had (or who are rumored to have had) sex.

The behavior you describe is a serious problem, and I despair that it seems to have become worse (in terms of being easier to engage in and disseminate, thanks to social media) than it was when I was your age (many, many moons ago).  There are some great documentaries and articles on the subject, highlighting how pervasive and destructive it is and discussing ways of addressing it, but it's also good to sometimes sit back and sort of share a knowing laugh with fictional characters about how utterly fucked up it is.

Yes and I absolutely love the movie. It does hit right on about the bullshit that we teenage girls go through because guys think it is funny to spread shit about us.

1 hour ago, ari333 said:

THIS ^^^^

"utterly fucked up" -- nailed it

It is fucked up.

[Quof]

Is anyone else missing the old TWOP rule that prohibited flooding the board by making multiple consecutive posts?   I am ignoring certain posters, yet my page shows as many as 6 consecutive posts at a time, on multiple threads.  

[ari333]

27 minutes ago, Quof said:

Is anyone else missing the old TWOP rule that prohibited flooding the board by making multiple consecutive posts?   I am ignoring certain posters, yet my page shows as many as 6 consecutive posts at a time, on multiple threads.  

If it is me who is on ignore I guess you won't see this. If it is me you're referring to, I'm sorry. I don't recall doing 6 posts in a row, but if it's me, apologies. I'll shut up now. Sorry. (if it's me)

Edited February 22, 2017 by ari333

[Splishy Splashy]

36 minutes ago, Quof said:

Is anyone else missing the old TWOP rule that prohibited flooding the board by making multiple consecutive posts?   I am ignoring certain posters, yet my page shows as many as 6 consecutive posts at a time, on multiple threads.  

I know I have made a lot of posts since I joined this past weekend both in the off topic and Riverdale section, but have not made a consecutive post or at least I don't think I have.

[DeLurker]

I got a group text yesterday from my brother in Florida - the other recipients were my brother and his wife who live a mile away;

Fl. Bro - All family safe & okay in Houston?

Me: Yes - why? (at 3:13)

SIL: Yes - did something happen?  (at 3:23)

Me - Clearly not to you or I (3:26)

SIL: I think there is an active shooter at a downtown hospital - maybe that is what he is referencing (3:33)

Fl. Bro: Good to hear everyone is ok (5:00)

We live outside of Houston, but outside means the next county.  Getting the text to check on us without any context was alarming, and ultimately, infuriating.  Especially once he went radio silent about whatever was significant enough to send a text about.

Even if the hospital incident was what he was talking about, none of us are in the hospital, work in the medical field nor work in Houston.

[topanga]

1 hour ago, DeLurker said:

We live outside of Houston, but outside means the next county.  Getting the text to check on us without any context was alarming, and ultimately, infuriating.  Especially once he went radio silent about whatever was significant enough to send a text about.

I tend to check on family and friends whenever a tragedy happens anywhere near where they live. But I always clarify why I'm contacting them. 

It's like when someone calls you, and you miss the call. You call the person back, and he says, "Yeah? What's up?" You called me, ass-hole! I have no idea what's up. (I don't really say that, sadly)

[auntlada]

2 hours ago, topanga said:

I tend to check on family and friends whenever a tragedy happens anywhere near where they live. But I always clarify why I'm contacting them. 

It's like when someone calls you, and you miss the call. You call the person back, and he says, "Yeah? What's up?" You called me, ass-hole! I have no idea what's up. (I don't really say that, sadly)

I used to work with a guy who would call me (on my cell even though he knew I was sitting at my desk within a foot of my work phone) and say, "What's up?" After a couple of times, I started saying, "I don't know. You called me." I would have liked to say exactly what you said, though, especially because I had to teach him how to do his job after he got promoted above me. And then he got a job I had applied for and did not get an interview for and thought it would be comforting for me to know that he thought that the company knew it wanted to hire him before it even advertised. He wasn't boasting; he really thought I would feel better knowing that. He was an idiot.

[annzeepark914]

Don't know if this qualifies as a pet peeve or what.  The other day I met a friend for lunch at California Pizza Kitchen.  It was a nice lunch, the food was decent, but midway through lunch a couple came in (ages? he might've been late 40's or early 50's; she late 30's).  They sat behind my friend, together, on the same side of the booth.  I thought to myself--odd.  So, while my friend is telling me about lectures she attended, talking about current events, etc., I'm noticing these two characters.  First I see him feed her a heaping forkful of some type of chopped salad.  Then, she feeds him a forkful of whatever she's eating.  At the end of their meal, he puts his head on her shoulder.  I couldn't tell my friend (until we left) cause they'd hear me.  Sheesh.  A CPK tryst I betcha on a Tuesday afternoon.

[bilgistic]

Over age 15, that's not cute.

[Bastet]

That annoyed me even at 15.

[ratgirlagogo]

Geez, let's at least imagine them as possibly happy.  So many things happen over age 15 that are not cute that I hate to begrudge happiness to even annoying people.

[AgentRXS]

This isn't a huge pet peeve but just something that annoyed me today and wanted to get off my chest.

I live in a quadplex that's located in the heart of a tourist town. I originally moved here in 2014 and had a landlord who was looking for long-term residents. She undercharged me the going rate for this area, stating she just wanted someone who would be reliable in paying the rent. Great,awesome. There were a few things broken in the unit but nothing major that needed immediate fixing. I just took photos when I moved in to document that I didn't cause the issue.  Fast-foward to late 2015, when she sells the unit to someone new. This person booted the renter in unit #2 out, stating she was going to make units #1 (which was vacant) and unit #2 vacation rentals, and leave my neighbor and  in units 3 and 4, respectively. Got my lease renewal last June, and it will be up in this June. Rent went up but only by less that $50--not too bad. During this year, a pipe burst and my water heater needed replacing. Both of these happened in those middle-of-the-night unexpected emergency situations. Plumbers and water heater repairmen called out with quick notice.

Fast-forward to now. The vacation rental thing fell through. They are now renting the whole quadplex into long-term rentals once again. Someone new just moved into #2 yesterday. During this whole year, my neighbor has been fretting to me that he was afraid he and I were going to be booted out like the previous renter for #2 and that the whole place was going to be converted to vacation rentals.

Today we had the following conversation:

Neighbor: Did you hear? No more vacation rentals, I guess that means I am safe.

Me: That's cool.'

Neighbor: Not you though. I heard you are on the way out. Every repairman that's been in your apartment has said that its the worse they've ever seen. All of them have talked about it after they left. They say they would never sit in there and have said your apartment should be condemned. They say it in front of the landlord all the time. She's not saying anything to you because she is just biding her time until your lease ends. Just thought you should now.

Wait,what? 1st of all, both repairmen that came were allergic to cats and bitched about them the whole time, even though the litter boxes were cleaned and the cats were never seen. They both carried on about how much they disliked cats.  #2 yeah, my floors were a little dirty when they came (I'm bad about that, and didn't have time to clean before they came) but my walls and kitchen are clean, I don't leave trash around my apartment, never had a problem with roaches/rodents. Yeah my place is a little cluttered since I have a lot of stuff in a small area (not much closet space) but its not like I have crap stacked piles high. I just need to be a bit more organized. This guy is retired, sits home all day and still has a maid. I work long hours, sometimes double-shifts, and get behind in cleaning sometimes but never thought it was that bad. Why would my landlord not say anything if what he's saying is true? Anyway, I feel so bad, I am going to start hiring a maid anyway because I already feel lacking in my cleaning skills, but this just made it worse.......and its not like I can really afford it. And if its about the things that were previously broken before my arrival, then why hasn't she offered to repair them?

[riley702]

Any chance this guy's just making shit up because he's bored and/or senile?

[DeLurker]

Seriously, your apartment would need to be radiating toxic levels of stank and oozing goop to be grounds for terminating a rental.  I used to do property inspections for apartment buildings and I've seen units that actually had a yellow coating of tar(?)  from how much and how long the tenants smoked.

If you are paying your rent on time and are not in violation of any significant provision of the rental agreement, no property owner is going to bounce a long term resident who they've had no problem with for being a bit messy.

And why would the landlord say something to the neighbor?

[StatisticalOutlier]

On 2/22/2017 at 1:11 PM, topanga said:

It's like when someone calls you, and you miss the call. You call the person back, and he says, "Yeah? What's up?" You called me, ass-hole! I have no idea what's up. (I don't really say that, sadly)

Did the person leave a message?  If I miss a call and the person doesn't leave a message, I never call back because (1) if they want me to call back, they should say so, and (2) they may have mis-dialed.  But I'm mean and I hate cell phones and long for the days where to carry on a conversation, people had to be tethered to the couch.

 

On 2/22/2017 at 0:05 PM, DeLurker said:

I got a group text yesterday from my brother in Florida - the other recipients were my brother and his wife who live a mile away;

...

We live outside of Houston, but outside means the next county.  Getting the text to check on us without any context was alarming, and ultimately, infuriating.  Especially once he went radio silent about whatever was significant enough to send a text about.

That's also part of my peeve about cell phones.  Everything's just too damn easy.  If, in order to find out if you're okay, he'd had to dial your number and have you answer the phone and then ask his question, would he have done it in this situation?  Probably not. 

So "significant enough to send a text about"?  Doesn't have to be very significant at all, and he's probably proud of himself for being so thoughtful and going to all that trouble to express concern (like he's not going to hear about it if one of you DID happen to be downtown and was being shot at??), without any actual regard for you if he just throws that out there and then goes silent. 

[Blergh]

On 2/23/2017 at 11:44 PM, AgentRXS said:

This isn't a huge pet peeve but just something that annoyed me today and wanted to get off my chest.

I live in a quadplex that's located in the heart of a tourist town. I originally moved here in 2014 and had a landlord who was looking for long-term residents. She undercharged me the going rate for this area, stating she just wanted someone who would be reliable in paying the rent. Great,awesome. There were a few things broken in the unit but nothing major that needed immediate fixing. I just took photos when I moved in to document that I didn't cause the issue.  Fast-foward to late 2015, when she sells the unit to someone new. This person booted the renter in unit #2 out, stating she was going to make units #1 (which was vacant) and unit #2 vacation rentals, and leave my neighbor and  in units 3 and 4, respectively. Got my lease renewal last June, and it will be up in this June. Rent went up but only by less that $50--not too bad. During this year, a pipe burst and my water heater needed replacing. Both of these happened in those middle-of-the-night unexpected emergency situations. Plumbers and water heater repairmen called out with quick notice.

Fast-forward to now. The vacation rental thing fell through. They are now renting the whole quadplex into long-term rentals once again. Someone new just moved into #2 yesterday. During this whole year, my neighbor has been fretting to me that he was afraid he and I were going to be booted out like the previous renter for #2 and that the whole place was going to be converted to vacation rentals.

Today we had the following conversation:

Neighbor: Did you hear? No more vacation rentals, I guess that means I am safe.

Me: That's cool.'

Neighbor: Not you though. I heard you are on the way out. Every repairman that's been in your apartment has said that its the worse they've ever seen. All of them have talked about it after they left. They say they would never sit in there and have said your apartment should be condemned. They say it in front of the landlord all the time. She's not saying anything to you because she is just biding her time until your lease ends. Just thought you should now.

Wait,what? 1st of all, both repairmen that came were allergic to cats and bitched about them the whole time, even though the litter boxes were cleaned and the cats were never seen. They both carried on about how much they disliked cats.  #2 yeah, my floors were a little dirty when they came (I'm bad about that, and didn't have time to clean before they came) but my walls and kitchen are clean, I don't leave trash around my apartment, never had a problem with roaches/rodents. Yeah my place is a little cluttered since I have a lot of stuff in a small area (not much closet space) but its not like I have crap stacked piles high. I just need to be a bit more organized. This guy is retired, sits home all day and still has a maid. I work long hours, sometimes double-shifts, and get behind in cleaning sometimes but never thought it was that bad. Why would my landlord not say anything if what he's saying is true? Anyway, I feel so bad, I am going to start hiring a maid anyway because I already feel lacking in my cleaning skills, but this just made it worse.......and its not like I can really afford it. And if its about the things that were previously broken before my arrival, then why hasn't she offered to repair them?

 Gee, all these folks are talking all this trash to the one neighbor about you but NONE of them are saying a peep to you?  Just consider the source and what he might possibly   gain re making these claims on other folks' behalves  . That's all I'm saying.

[Jaded]

On 2/23/2017 at 11:44 PM, AgentRXS said:

Fast-forward to now. The vacation rental thing fell through. They are now renting the whole quadplex into long-term rentals once again. Someone new just moved into #2 yesterday. During this whole year, my neighbor has been fretting to me that he was afraid he and I were going to be booted out like the previous renter for #2 and that the whole place was going to be converted to vacation rentals.

Today we had the following conversation:

Neighbor: Did you hear? No more vacation rentals, I guess that means I am safe.

Me: That's cool.'

Neighbor: Not you though. I heard you are on the way out. Every repairman that's been in your apartment has said that its the worse they've ever seen. All of them have talked about it after they left. They say they would never sit in there and have said your apartment should be condemned. They say it in front of the landlord all the time. She's not saying anything to you because she is just biding her time until your lease ends. Just thought you should now.

Wait,what? 

That sounds like a shitty position to be stuck in. Just in case it is true I'd mention it to the landlord in a conversation or by letter and say you heard it through the grapevine. You wouldn't be mentioning names but if she's been talking to that neighbor about you like that she'll know that person is a ginormous big mouth. You could also mention how heavy your workload has been and your plans to try and be more tidy.  Then if that neighbor was spouting the truth hopefully you'd find out and if worse comes to worse you could get a head start looking elsewhere for a place. It's only going to drive you more crazy not knowing one way or the other. 

[auntlada]

You could always tell the landlord, "I've been so busy at work that I've hired someone to come in and clean, so if you see someone strange going in my apartment when I'm not there, that's who it is."

[Maharincess]

On 2/13/2017 at 2:18 PM, StatisticalOutlier said:

Today's pet peeve:  People who "save" tables at counter-service restaurants.  I was at Jersey Mike's and there was a pretty long line, and those places are always as slow as molasses.  A threesome came in, and two of them got in line while the other sat at an empty table, and sat, and sat.  I timed it--16 minutes of hogging that table before her friends showed up with their food. 

As it turns out, enough of the people were getting their food to go that the tables never completely filled up, so it didn't cause a problem.  But that fact also indicates that it wasn't necessary for her to save that table in the first place. 

Hey, I get it.  I'm as nervous as the next person about a table opening up for me when I get my order, but I just deal with it, figuring the natural flow will take care of it, and if it doesn't, then I'll figure something out.  Disrupting the natural flow is not acceptable.

How do you know she was "hogging" the table though?  Maybe she had some kind of disability that made it hard for her to stand in line for so long. Maybe her friends always wait in line while she sits because her friends know its hard for her to stand for so long.  Not all disabilities are visible to other people.

I know this post is older but  just catching up on the thread here.  

[Frisson]

I am so tired of people who can't be bothered to socialize without being on their phones the whole time. I hosted an Oscar party, complete with red carpet, a photo booth, and mini-statues for guests. One guest couldn't be bothered to put down her phone to fill out her ballot or watch trailers for the movies she didn't see. Ugh!

[Qoass]

Quote

 I hate cell phones and long for the days where to carry on a conversation, people had to be tethered to the couch.

Yeah, I hate being on the phone at all and knowing that the person I'm speaking to is likely multitasking makes me feel like I'm low priority.

@Frisson, I had the same experience at a Super Bowl party:  everyone in the room was actually socializing with somebody at another party via phone.  Hate.

[DarkRaichu]

People who do any of these while driving (in a highway):
- Eating a bowl of cereal / soup
- Putting on makeup (especially the eye lash mascara)
- Reading a book
- Texting
- Play Pokemon Go or any other games on their smart phones

Seriously, you are NOT alone on the road !!!!

[DeLurker]

@Frisson - wow!  You went all out for the party.  I'm sorry that people don't realize how infuriatingly rude that is.  I say don't invite those people in the future,

[StatisticalOutlier]

19 hours ago, Maharincess said:

How do you know she was "hogging" the table though?  Maybe she had some kind of disability that made it hard for her to stand in line for so long. Maybe her friends always wait in line while she sits because her friends know its hard for her to stand for so long.  Not all disabilities are visible to other people.

I used the example I gave only because it reminded me of something I see pretty often.  The other day, I saw a family put a girl about 8 years old at a table for six, by herself, while the rest of them were in line.  As the tables around her filled up, that poor kid looked miserable, and had a guilty look on her face.

In fact, I've seen signs at some places telling you not to take a table until you have placed your order, so it's not an unusual occurrence.

But in the case you're referring to, I watched the whole thing play out and I didn't get the impression she was disabled.  I could be wrong, of course.  It sometimes hurts for me to stand for long periods, and nobody would ever guess from looking at me, so I'm aware of the issue.

But in addition to my general impression of them when they were getting sorted out, I noticed that there were a couple of tables with two seats available, and a counter with individual seats, and she chose to sit at a table with four seats (there were three in her group), and she chose the seat next to the wall.  It didn't look to me like she was temporarily perching instead of saving a table for her group to sit at.

[ari333]

I have a friend who emails me. I have asked several times, please do not send me chain letters. I have asked many times, please do not give my email addy to others. Yet I get emails with many addresses, mass emails, of which mine is one. Iow, everyone who opens theirs , can see my address in the header. I HAVE ASKED HER TO STOP THAT.

She is a teacher with a masters in English. so I know she understands. She apparently just doesn't care bc it is not a big deal to her. Maybe she is not internet savvy. That is not an excuse when someone makes a direct request several times. Damn. 

She posts on a public forum. (You don't have to join to read it) . She posts where she works, what grade she teaches; she posts some personal things ABOUT HER STUDENTS WITH THEIR FIRST NAMES INCLUDED; I wont include names here - "little so and so acts out and has a problem with porn" "little so and so cant read"   "Little so and so hates her step dad." "Little so and so doesn't bathe and smells." WHAT? WTF?  

She posts the fact that she takes sleeping pills and her other medical issues.

OMG it is horrifying.      And she puts her real name out there.  I finally said, " if you don't stop putting my email address on that stupid fucking mass email 'cc to a hundred people' bullshit I can no longer have contact with you. "  

Good lord, you'd think she'd know better.

Edited February 27, 2017 by ari333

[ari333]

Ok I'll say it.I thought about calling her principal or writing something anonymously. Those students' privacy is being invaded imo.

[auntlada]

I'm not sure exactly what information is covered by FERPA, but it sounds like she is probably violating it.

[Sun-Bun]

I'm a teacher of 15+ years; I've seen numerous colleagues get fired thanks to social media, either from oversharing negative things about themselves or their students online. The number one rule of any teacher should be to NEVER even mention any students by name to others online and to certainly never air classroom dirty laundry like that. Hence the reason I'm leery of befriending coworkers, and I don't attach my school's name to mine online anywhere but via my LinkedIn; and NEVER socialize with current students on social media, oh lord no!

I'd tell your friend to immediately either make that mess she's posting out a private account, ari333, or warn her to change her name and/or the names of all the students she mentions. Or just delete that mess completely and quit using her students as social media comic relief/horror stories.

Otherwise she WILL have someone find that blog and she WILL be fired immediately. Rumors of gossipy teacher online activity like those travel fast in school communities, and either other students/parents at her school or other co-workers will find her postings and send them to her superiors. I'd hate to see yet another smart teacher fired for online stupidity, but it happens quite regularly thanks to documented unprofessionalism via Twitter/Facebook.

 

I'd also like to add: yearsssss ago I myself lost a PT teaching position at a Christian school simply because of an old blog post on my MySpace poking good-natured fun at some of the school's parent behaviors. Never mind that my school/position was listed nowhere on my account, no names were mentioned at all, and it was private. Some creepy student at the school somehow got into my account, showed HER mom that old blog post and some of my old modeling pics I had on this account, and then her mom sent copies of everything to my principal. I literally had another student email me to warn me that kids all over the school were giggling at screenshots of my entire private account.

I was mortified and deleted the whole account that same day, but the damage was already done: after my principal and her colleague read me back my blog posts and shamed me for my pics, I was fired on the spot. Talk about wanting the earth to suck me into a black hole at that very moment: it's still one of my most cringeworthy moments ever.

I was bitter for many years after that incident and still am to some extent, but it at least taught me a valuable lesson I'll never forget: unfortunately, if you wanna work with students under 18, you're still expected to keep most of your online behavior either extremely guarded or locked down.

Just remember, fellow teachers: be so careful of what you tweet. Don't share too much about your job/students unless it's blindingly positive and glowing. Keep anything too radically sexual/political/racially-charged OFF your social media feeds. And when in doubt, don't post it. Private accounts are your friends. Unless you get some determined kid who will find ways to befriend friends of your friends just to look at your account, so lock those accounts down tight; middle schoolers are sorta creepy like that.

Edited February 28, 2017 by Sun-Bun

[backformore]

@ari333, there have been a few stories of teachers losing their jobs over stuff like what your friend is doing.  I know I read one about some teachers posting on social media negative comments about immigrant kids.    My suggestion, if you want to be a friend, is to find articles about teachers facing disciplinary action for gossipy stuff, or political opinions, and forward those articles to your friend. Maybe she'll get the message. 

[DeLurker]

I am more offended by her talking about her kids, especially any perceived shortcomings they have as students.  Your friend is an idiot, but she's an adult idiot who holds the position of teaching children.  She can make any dumb ass decision she wants about herself, her job and her safety, but she's exposing these kids to ridicule plus making them vulnerable to predators since she is giving a nice tidbits about them, their names and where they would be on school days.

As a parent, I expect more from the people responsible for both educating and the well being of children in their care.  As a tax payer, I am resentful of paying taxes to support a school system and/or a teacher so cavalier to their chosen profession.

If it were my child, I would want it reported and stopped immediately.  I'd also want to know what are the school district's policies regarding social media by their employees.

[Blergh]

DeLurker,

 

 Totally agree! Thankfully, I went to school LONG before social media existed but I'm STILL unhappy about teachers deliberately humiliating me and other students in public and wish they'd been stopped.  IOW, NAIL HER, ARI333!

[ari333]

My first inclination was to nail her by reporting her anonymously. She is not a real life friend; I "met" her online as someone to chat with etc. . She seemed normal until these issues came up. I was so horrified. I know it is harsh and she may get fired. I thought if I had a child and they were mentioned in any negative way online by a teacher, I'd be livid and want her fired. Even if folks saw it , thought they recognized a child's description or negative whatever,  and assumed the wrong child was being discussed, it shouldnt happen at all so no one can speculate about to whom she is referring.

At the time it came up I mentioned to her that imo what she was saying online was too much info, for one thing; and two, it is more  than likely illegal (talking about kids/students.) Let's call her B. I said, "B, everyone on this site is not your friend. You're giving out too much information. It would not take a genius to find your school and identify you. " She had given her first name for sure, IIRC and I know I recall that she described herself physically in great detail. (assuming that is true, but it was not glowing. ) I recall that she told me that I am paranoid , but I know for sure kids shouldn't be put online by anyone other than their parents (and even then I cringe;) and people's email addys should be kept private at their request.  

There was a mutual (also met online) friend. Let's call her M. Well, M is like minded like me. She was horrified as well about all the same things. She said that she emailed B and said basically the same thing I said.

Also, this is chilling. There were bullies on that site. (not well moderated site or moderated at all.) She had pissed a couple of them off for whatever reason. Someone got a bee in their bonnet (heh, I like to say that) and somehow they found a photo of her and posted it. It was fucking chilling. It was indeed her bc she emailed me freaking out about it. It was not a flattering photo. Let me leave it there. It was not sexual or inappropriate in an any way, just a horrible photo.  Point is they found it.

As I mentioned she ignored (forgot? didn't care?) about my request (and M's request) of not giving out our email addys and no more fucking chain letters. She continued. She still mentioned the kids but, "changed the names." I don't care. Don't talk about them at all. Damn.  She is almost 60 yrs old and should know better on all above counts.

In retrospect, she had a very long, unusual screen name and a very distinct posting style. (same phrases, identifying catch phrases) One of the bullies just simply had to google her screen name  which she used on all forums, etc.  (mistake) She apparently had posted that photo (WHY???) or someone had, on another site with the same screen name (eeek!) and that's how the bully got it. I'm guessing all this. Still, it didn't take a genius hacker.  

(Hee. I just typed "counts" and didn't click the  "o". Ooops. ) 

Edited February 28, 2017 by ari333

[StatisticalOutlier]

9 hours ago, DeLurker said:

I am more offended by her talking about her kids, especially any perceived shortcomings they have as students. 

I'll admit I'm not at all into this Facebook/internet tell-everything scene we're living in now, but I think it's inappropriate for a teacher to be talking about her students at all.  Even praising them.  I just don't get it.

[ari333]

37 minutes ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

I'll admit I'm not at all into this Facebook/internet tell-everything scene we're living in now, but I think it's inappropriate for a teacher to be talking about her students at all.  Even praising them.  I just don't get it.

Agreed. Me too. Do not mention them at all. Period. (imo) Even praise could get some weirdo's attention and here we go.

Glad the site is back up here.

[auntlada]

18 hours ago, Sun-Bun said:

I'd hate to see yet another smart teacher fired for online stupidity, but it happens quite regularly thanks to documented unprofessionalism via Twitter/Facebook.

I'd hate to see a smart teacher fired for online stupidity, too, but it doesn't sound like this one is a smart teacher.

[StatisticalOutlier]

On 2/27/2017 at 6:59 AM, Qoass said:

Yeah, I hate being on the phone at all and knowing that the person I'm speaking to is likely multitasking makes me feel like I'm low priority.

I agree.  Low priority is exactly right.

People know not to call me while they're driving because I raise such a stink, but I never know when I call someone, especially if it's someone I don't really know (like a plumber), if they'll answer the phone while driving.  It bothers me that I could be on the other end of the phone some time when the person I'm talking to gets in a wreck, never mind kills somebody. 

My first job out of college, back in the late 1970s, was as a file clerk for a state agency.  (That's what an economics degree will get you.)

There were 7 file clerks in an area with the files, and we each had one of those yellow or orange or blue steelcase desks.  We shared one phone--it was in an adjacent area, about 20 feet away, sitting on a table. 

The file clerks were in their early 20s up to around 40, single, married, some with kids.  Somehow the single ones maintained a (robust, in some cases) social life, the married ones still had a husband after being at work all day, and the ones with kids managed to raise their kids--all without a phone at their fingertips.

I think this grounding is why I'm so annoyed by people being on their phones 24/7. 

[zxy556575]

I've been ordering food from Schwan's delivery service for probably 10 years. I always use the freezer bag delivery option where the drivers leave everything on your doorstep. No human interaction required. Schwan's provides the freezer bags and cold packs.

This week the driver left a note after delivery that he was "weary" of using that bag since it was difficult to close. Ahem. First of all, I had put out two bags because I had a rather large order. Secondly, I currently have six bags, all alike, and I don't necessarily pick the same one out of the pile every time.

Basically, screw the fact that "this bag" is defective It does close and was when the driver left. Secondly, if it was damaged or if there are newer/better bags, then shitting leave me one of those to use from now on.

I was so irritated that I write Schwan's to say I was "weary" of being their customer and would no longer be ordering from them.

Edited March 1, 2017 by Lord Donia

[Quof]

Do you think he truly was weary, as opposed to wary? Because so many people use those words incorrectly.