Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

[Oldernowiser]

Just saw this article on Cnn this morning...

“Most coronavirus cases are spread by people without symptoms

Most coronavirus infections are spread by people who have no symptoms, the CDC said in newly updated guidance.

It's one of the main reasons mask use is so important, the CDC said.

"Most SARS-CoV-2 infections are spread by people without symptoms," the agency said in a section of its website devoted to explaining the science of how to use masks to control the spread of the virus.

"CDC and others estimate that more than 50% of all infections are transmitted from people who are not exhibiting symptoms," it added in the guidance, posted Friday. "This means at least half of new infections come from people likely unaware they are infectious to others."

“Peak infectiousness comes five days after infection, the agency said on the website. "With these assumptions, 59% of infections would be transmitted when no symptoms are present but could range (from) 51%-70% if the fraction of asymptomatic infections were 24%-30% and peak infectiousness ranged 4-6 days."

[Boston]

12 hours ago, PikaScrewChu said:

I'm going to stay with my parents for awhile. This living situation is not sustainable. My boss is understanding. I have a few things to wrap up here before I can leave but I'm not coming back until the new year.

I need to drop off the keys with a co-worker. The management whom is normally easy to deal with has become an outright nightmare to deal with since March. Normally I would cut them slack because COVID and all that, but they haven't been checking empty units since March. It's being left up to fire departments and the police if there are issues. The last thing I need is my unit broken into by the fire department because someone heard a loud sound and having to rush back. 😒 

My heart is with you.  I have been there.  Where I live there is no more maintenance.. Who wants to come into a strangers apt/condo.  Stay safe.

[Oldernowiser]

There’s an excellent article on the Atlantic website about the psychology of an invisible threat. I am not going to post a link because it contains one political reference but, with that caveat,  if anyone is interested in reading it it’s titled, “Your Individually Rational Choice Is Collectively Disastrous.”

[Boston]

21 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

Oh, honey. I am so sorry...smack your office mate (and possibly your boyfriend) upside the head with something at least six feet long. Do you have an HR department or some equivalent you can file a complaint with? That jackass is going to get you sick...google asymptomatic carriers. He’s an asshole.

Your parents? I think you have to be honest with yourself as to how you’d feel if they got sick after your get together. It might not have even been you...but you would think it was. 

I keep reading stories about people being just butt stubborn about this...some idiot Mom in Georgia threw a homecoming party for 250 high school kids. What could go wrong? 🙄 It’s like all these deniers are suddenly toddlers and are throwing tantrums because they’ve been in timeout too long.

YOU STAY SAFE. And it’s time to have a long chat with your boyfriend*. An hour in an enclosed space is plenty of time to contract this thing.

*On the phone!

My "family".. my "other" family.. yes they are related (but i have a shitty mother and my dad is in Maryland..he's great).. they all live in NH.. and most of them (since the summer) don't MASK at all.. we're talking adults and children.  Not taking the risk.  I will miss my auntie (more of a mother than mine) and we will all (some of us do what we have to do.

[rue721]

Lately, I feel like many people are doing whatever they want and then twisting themselves into pretzels trying to justify it as "safe."

We all have to make allowances for ourselves, nobody is quarantining perfectly -- so I try not to be judgemental. But it's difficult when it feels like other people's choices (or lack of emotional maturity) are endangering you and vulnerable people around you!

Anyhow I spoke to my boyfriend, and we agreed to only socialize with friends outdoors until the holidays are over. It's far from perfect, but I think that's the best we can do given the other life obligations that we've got to keep.

[DangerousMinds]

1 hour ago, Oldernowiser said:

Just saw this article on Cnn this morning...

“Most coronavirus cases are spread by people without symptoms

Most coronavirus infections are spread by people who have no symptoms, the CDC said in newly updated guidance.

It's one of the main reasons mask use is so important, the CDC said.

"Most SARS-CoV-2 infections are spread by people without symptoms," the agency said in a section of its website devoted to explaining the science of how to use masks to control the spread of the virus.

"CDC and others estimate that more than 50% of all infections are transmitted from people who are not exhibiting symptoms," it added in the guidance, posted Friday. "This means at least half of new infections come from people likely unaware they are infectious to others."

“Peak infectiousness comes five days after infection, the agency said on the website. "With these assumptions, 59% of infections would be transmitted when no symptoms are present but could range (from) 51%-70% if the fraction of asymptomatic infections were 24%-30% and peak infectiousness ranged 4-6 days."

And this is what our bubbles REALLY look like:

 

 

[zoomama]

random question --- isnt there a pattern of what day of the week they make announcements?  i have to believe that baby is born and they are waiting for the right moment. i just cant remember what the pattern is. 

[iwantcookies]

I am sick so no surgery today. Hoping it’s just a cold. 
 

 

[latetotheparty]

48 minutes ago, iwantcookies said:

I am sick so no surgery today. Hoping it’s just a cold. 
 

 

That’s a pain. You’re already psyched up. 😞

[Nysha]

Dear friends, I have discovered TikTok and I may need an intervention. It was bad enough when I couldn't sit through a 30 minute TV show, then any YouTube videos longer than 10 minutes, but this is entertainment in 30-90 seconds! I was swiping until 1:30 am last night and I get up at 5:30. This is not good because now I want a nap and if I take it, I'll be up even later.

On the other hand, I now have a new recipe for smashed potatoes, learned a LOT of new swear words, and watched a 20-something portray the most realistic toddler interactions imaginable. 

[DangerousMinds]

1 hour ago, iwantcookies said:

I am sick so no surgery today. Hoping it’s just a cold. 
 

 

What were the results of your Covid test?

[PikaScrewChu]

5 hours ago, Boston said:

My heart is with you.  I have been there.  Where I live there is no more maintenance.. Who wants to come into a strangers apt/condo.  Stay safe.

It's become a huge issue. The lack of maintenance lead to a fire a month ago. Thankfully the closest fire department is less than 5 minutes away so they got here fast before it could spread.

I'm hoping that the management makes smarter decisions in the new year because we're all a bit wary of how things are going. 

[Boston]

1 hour ago, PikaScrewChu said:

It's become a huge issue. The lack of maintenance lead to a fire a month ago. Thankfully the closest fire department is less than 5 minutes away so they got here fast before it could spread.

I'm hoping that the management makes smarter decisions in the new year because we're all a bit wary of how things are going. 

I thought i had it bad.. I have been living here for over 20 years and now.. wait for it.. MICE.. I put things in perspective and am more worried about this virus than anything.  I FEEL FOR YOU bigtime.  My neighbor (who is basically my only LITERAL friend and double masks).  was here on Friday nite.  we BOTH were screaming.. a mouse (kind of drunk-like) sauntered from the kitchen to bathroom.  It was the most noise and fun I have had.  Since then, no more mice.  I have the place BAITED.. D-CON ETC.   We all need to feel safe, from whatever it is that scares us.  (and i have a ton of shit)

Edited November 25, 2020 by Boston

[Oldernowiser]

1 hour ago, Nysha said:

On the other hand, I now have a new recipe for smashed potatoes, learned a LOT of new swear words, and watched a 20-something portray the most realistic toddler interactions imaginable. 

Okay, is it wrong that I ranked these, reaction-wise, as follows...

1) NEW SWEAR WORDS? Hooray!

2) Smashed potatoes...also good.

3) Adult acting like a toddler...no thank you. Seen much too much of that!

[SunnyBeBe]

My parent’s county is in critical alert status.  So many people are positive or have been exposed to someone who is positive! I’m not surprised. Most people in that county ignored covid precautions.  Their ignorance is infuriating. They were warned, but ignored it. Now, they are sick or under quarantine. 
 

  I’ll go to be with my parents ONLY for Thanksgiving. No other guests.  The grocery store that I reported for violations recently has been closed. A long time friend, colleague, is in the hospital....very sick with covid.  My parents nor I are going to go into any business or around any other person in that county for a good while. I’ll pick up groceries in other counties.
 

On a lighter note, my Christmas decorating is coming along. I won’t be done until this weekend.  I got a late start.  

[PikaScrewChu]

1 hour ago, Boston said:

I thought i had it bad.. I have been living here for over 20 years and now.. wait for it.. MICE.. I put things in perspective and am more worried about this virus than anything.  I FEEL FOR YOU bigtime.  My neighbor (who is basically my only LITERAL friend and double masks).  was here on Friday nite.  we BOTH were screaming.. a mouse (kind of drunk-like) sauntered from the kitchen to bathroom.  It was the most noise and fun I have had.  Since then, no more mice.  I have the place BAITED.. D-CON ETC.   We all need to feel safe, from whatever it is that scares us.  (and i have a ton of shit)

Oh efffff. We have rats here and that was my biggest fear when there was no cleaning staff on site this summer. There would be chicken bones littering the hallway. It was so gross.

[Absolom]

I finished my Christmas shopping about half an hour ago!  That's a big relief.

[jcbrown]

I'm having a pretty crappy day. 😞 Started with a Zoom call to discuss my dad's decline. Fun fact, I had forgotten it was today--I knew it was on Tuesday but did not connect that fact with the fact that Tuesday was today. So I was wearing my workout clothes, which was pretty but not the point. Dad has declined a LOT these last eight months. He can no longer dress or bathe by himself. He is down to 134 pounds (at 5'11"), partially because he cannot see his food (they are trying to address this with sectioned-off plates and instructions) and partially because he hallucinates that children are running through it and that makes him not want to eat it. He is hallucinating pretty much constantly and that sometimes keeps him up all night. He still mostly only needs the assistance of one person at a time so he can stay where he is for now. If he declines to need the assistance of two people at a time most of the time, we will have to look for a nursing home. I don't even want to think about how we would accomplish moving him (he is 2500 miles from me).

And then this afternoon I learned a friend died this morning. She had colon cancer and had been on chemo every other week since 2009 so it is not a surprise but it is still a shock.

At least my cranberry sauce is in the fridge and I have the crust and filling for my maple-pecan galette chilling to be combined and baked tomorrow. Our Thanksgiving guests will just have to suck it up and eat dessert that's made Wednesday rather than Thursday. Kidding, we're not having Thanksgiving guests, of course.

 

[iwantcookies]

5 hours ago, DangerousMinds said:

What were the results of your Covid test?

I wasn’t told. I assume negative. 

[iwantcookies]

Overheard today

A 80-90 year old lady telling her home health aid

My grandson is a nasty boy all he does is watch pornography 

 

I almost died laughing 

[GeeGolly]

So after you all got me thinking about xmas decorations, I'm thinking of buying an electric fireplace instead of a tree. When we rebuilt our house after the weather event I decided against having a fireplace because in our original house we only used it a couple of times a year, it limited how we could place our furniture and that wall was always a bit cold because of the fireplace.

I'm having a hard time finding an affordable one I like because so many are TV stands. I want one that looks like a fireplace. This way I could decorate the fireplace for some festive spirit and also have a visually appealing addition to our living room the rest of the year.

Do any of you posters have one? Or have any suggestions?

[ginger90]

52 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

So after you all got me thinking about xmas decorations, I'm thinking of buying an electric fireplace instead of a tree. When we rebuilt our house after the weather event I decided against having a fireplace because in our original house we only used it a couple of times a year, it limited how we could place our furniture and that wall was always a bit cold because of the fireplace.

I'm having a hard time finding an affordable one I like because so many are TV stands. I want one that looks like a fireplace. This way I could decorate the fireplace for some festive spirit and also have a visually appealing addition to our living room the rest of the year.

Do any of you posters have one? Or have any suggestions?

One of my daughters has this one. It’s from Home Depot and she loves it. She has a television on it, but of course you don’t have to. 😀 Throwing one in here with Elsie, (art by Elsie) because she’s cute. 🤣

Edited November 25, 2020 by ginger90

[frenchtoast]

41 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

So after you all got me thinking about xmas decorations, I'm thinking of buying an electric fireplace instead of a tree. When we rebuilt our house after the weather event I decided against having a fireplace because in our original house we only used it a couple of times a year, it limited how we could place our furniture and that wall was always a bit cold because of the fireplace.

I'm having a hard time finding an affordable one I like because so many are TV stands. I want one that looks like a fireplace. This way I could decorate the fireplace for some festive spirit and also have a visually appealing addition to our living room the rest of the year.

Do any of you posters have one? Or have any suggestions?

We never used our fireplace in the old house in MA and actually put an electric fireplace in front of it and then put an entertainment center with a fireplace in front of it. Because we had a mantle, we didn't purchase the one @ginger90 linked but I saw that at Ocean State Job Lot as well as Home Depot. And thought about getting it for my mom but she wasn't interested. I checked Home Depot online and a few on the first page are fireplaces that aren't entertainment centers in many different styles. 

FWIW, I loved the electric fireplace because I could have the ambiance of a fire without the heat if I chose. And if it was cold and rainy but I didn't want to change the thermostat I could put on the heater. Even though we have a fireplace in the new house and installed gas logs, we kept the electric fireplaces and I still love them. 

[GeeGolly]

Because all our trim and the windows are white, we're leaning toward white ones like the one below. Maybe I'm looking for something that doesn't exist, as I would like one more full sized, or at least taller, so the mantel is above waste height. The mantel on our real fireplace was about at my shoulders.

Came back to add the one shown below is well out of our price range - its over $3000.00!

 

Edited November 25, 2020 by GeeGolly

[Absolom]

It's certainly lovely though pricey.  

[Oldernowiser]

Elsie is gorgeous! Are those ears on their way up or will they stay that way, because that is just so very cute!

[Jynnan tonnix]

We only have our immediate bubble here for Thanksgiving...I know that, as per that graphic upthread, bubbles overlap, but Mom has to be here on weekends anyway when her home care is off. Then there are times I watch my granddaughter if there are issues with daycare. And  those times when my daughter has one of her meltdowns and is convinced she is dying, and the only thing that gives her husband any semblance of a reprieve is having them stay over at our house for a few days - though, thankfully, she has been doing much better lately...So, really, Thanksgiving is just going to be a normal weekend family dinner. T

Then, if all goes well, we might have one extra person for Christmas. My son in Maryland is planning on driving up. He'll do a Covid test, and quarantine until he gets the results, then basically quarantine here at the house until he drives back home. My other son, in Pensacola, will not be able to travel, so we won't be able to see him. Also, he said, just recently, that COVID had finally hit the barracks, which have managed to avoid it until now. He doesn't live in the barracks, but does share a house with a couple of other guys. Hoping that he can stay safe!

All the mentions of fireplaces made me think of ours out in our "porch". This photo is from last year - we won't decorate until after Thanksgiving - but it's an unvented gas fireplace, and we bought the mantel unfinished (it came in the three main pieces, which we had to wrestle with a bit to get them put together). I painted it just a shade darker than the walls, with the raised details done in an off-white to match the trim. It's my favorite room in the house. It began its life as the idea that we'd put in a screen porch over the deck in back, and between one thing and another, kind of took on a life of its own. We had the shell put up, with roof, windows, and doors, had the gas fireplace installed, but then did all the interior work, including electrical, ourselves. Wood plank (cedar) ceiling, trim, floors, stone veneer, etc. We've had it for six years now, and practically never fail to admire it all over again every time we sit out there.

 

Edited November 25, 2020 by Jynnan tonnix

[Oldernowiser]

4 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Do any of you posters have one? Or have any suggestions?

Try this?

https://www.houzz.com/products/canterbury-electric-fireplace-ivory-prvw-vr~62462428

Houzz frequently surprises me...they have several more that look nice, but dunno what style fits for you?

 I have purchased several things from them and have been very happy with the quality and delivery. Might be worth a look?

[Nysha]

@Jynnan tonnix, I love your porch! It looks like a very beautiful and relaxing living space.

[emma675]

I have an electric fireplace insert and it's the dumbest thing, but I love it. I have an old gas fireplace that would cost about $10,000 to bring up to code (very old house and previous owners who maybe installed it themselves and nothing is standard/safe). So I had the gas lines capped off, removed the fake logs, and put in the insert (it's this one from Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00K0NMFX2/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1). I have an outlet right by the fireplace, so the cord is pretty easily hidden. At night, it really does look like a real gas fire, with flickering flames on the back of the fireplace. I don't need the warmth from a real fire and I basically just wanted the ambiance during the winter with none of the clean up or maintenance. Besides the exercise pool I have in my garage, it's the dumbest, best thing I've ever bought!

[Jynnan tonnix]

12 minutes ago, emma675 said:

I have an electric fireplace insert and it's the dumbest thing, but I love it. I have an old gas fireplace that would cost about $10,000 to bring up to code (very old house and previous owners who maybe installed it themselves and nothing is standard/safe). So I had the gas lines capped off, removed the fake logs, and put in the insert (it's this one from Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00K0NMFX2/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1). I have an outlet right by the fireplace, so the cord is pretty easily hidden. At night, it really does look like a real gas fire, with flickering flames on the back of the fireplace. I don't need the warmth from a real fire and I basically just wanted the ambiance during the winter with none of the clean up or maintenance. Besides the exercise pool I have in my garage, it's the dumbest, best thing I've ever bought!

Tell me more about the pool in your garage...

 

[GeeGolly]

2 hours ago, Oldernowiser said:

Try this?

https://www.houzz.com/products/canterbury-electric-fireplace-ivory-prvw-vr~62462428

Houzz frequently surprises me...they have several more that look nice, but dunno what style fits for you?

 I have purchased several things from them and have been very happy with the quality and delivery. Might be worth a look?

This fireplace would be perfect, I love the look! But... like most of the ones I've seen its on the shorter side. Whatever I get will go between two windows and I feel like anything to low will look a little off, or too much like it was supposed to have a TV hanging over it.

@Jynnan tonnix, your fireplace is beautiful. I want it.

@emma675, you have a pool in your garage????

[emma675]

Lol, yes, I have an exercise pool in half of my garage. If you google "iPool", you can see what it is. I've had it for almost 6 years and it's the only exercise I've ever stuck with that long. 

[Oldernowiser]

@GeeGolly, do you have a corner that would work? This one is 53” tall.

https://www.houzz.com/products/empire-embc4sw-standard-corner-cabinet-mantel-with-base-white-prvw-vr~89769579

(I’m dangerous with any kind of online shopping challenge...I’ve bought everything from 1800 pounds of tile to 800 lbs of oak flooring online. It’s a sickness, really.)

ETA: Just realized that doesn’t include the insert. Pricey sucker.

Edited November 25, 2020 by Oldernowiser

[GeeGolly]

7 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

@GeeGolly, do you have a corner that would work? This one is 53” tall.

https://www.houzz.com/products/empire-embc4sw-standard-corner-cabinet-mantel-with-base-white-prvw-vr~89769579

(I’m dangerous with any kind of online shopping challenge...I’ve bought everything from 1800 pounds of tile to 800 lbs of oak flooring online. It’s a sickness, really.)

Oh my goodness. That fireplace is perfect, but no, we don't have a corner to put it in. I especially love the doors.

[Scarlett45]

I will be so happy when my Mom can drive herself to PT. I was late today picking her up from physical therapy because of the rain (I went to cheesecake factory to get dessert for tomorrow) and she asks “can we stop at starbucks?”NO MOM i have to get back to work! i am WORKING every day i take you to PT, and im already late for my next meeting (which wasnt an issue it got moved) if you want Starbucks tell me before i pick you UP or get uber eats.....

She acts like I dont have anything else to do but entertain her these days.

I know she's getting stronger, slowly but surely, in January Im sure she will need to go back to work to stop from driving me nuts. 

 

For those that wont be on the boards tomorrow celebrating the holiday Happy Thanksgiving (to those in the USA)- I am thankful for you and all the fun we have here in the Small Talk thread.

[GeeGolly]

Okay I've been scrolling through pages on the web looking for that corner fireplace in a wall style. Now that I've seen it I want it.

[ginger90]

5 hours ago, Oldernowiser said:

Elsie is gorgeous! Are those ears on their way up or will they stay that way, because that is just so very cute!

That’s in response to her name. 😀

 

This is relaxed:

[Oldernowiser]

56 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Okay I've been scrolling through pages on the web looking for that corner fireplace in a wall style. Now that I've seen it I want it.

So nice to have a new friend in Ridiculously Big Stuff Online Ordering Addiction...welcome to my world.

I’ve been using all of my building resource online ninja tricks...it’s HARD to find one that’s taller than about 40”. This one is 45” and Amazon has the best price I’ve seen..

https://www.amazon.com/Real-Flame-Antero-Electric-Fireplace/dp/B07XZS4QMH

Pottery Barn seems to have a few, but again, shorter...

I have one more source to try.

ETA: This one is 47” but looks like it takes forever to ship...

https://www.build.com/real-flame-6720e/s1664185?uid=3932628

This is 45” and on sale

https://www.build.com/real-flame-8060e/s1280227?uid=3044972

Though I had another one but it turned out to be another corner model...the search continues.

This one is sort of on sale...if there’s anyone in your family who’s good with tools it would be easy to build a plinth base under this, or really, any of them...to get them taller? Most of them only seem to weigh 130-150 lbs.

https://www.fireplacesdirect.com/electric-fireplaces/electric-fireplace-mantel-packages/greatco-white-heritage-cabinet-with-electric-fireplace.html

Good luck! I hope you find something you love...

 

 

 

 

Edited November 25, 2020 by Oldernowiser
Obsessive. Duh.

[Oldernowiser]

20 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

That’s in response to her name. 😀

 

This is relaxed:

See, now I can look at baby pictures all day long and just yawn. But this girl? THIS GIRL? THIS I LOVE SO SO SO MUCH!!! WANT!!! WANT!!!

German Shepherd and what? Some longer snout hound in there? 

[Scarlett45]

I swear this pandemic must have us all in our feelings, I received an email from a work partner congratulating me on a wonderful job I did with his request, and what I pleasure I was to work with and I made his holiday with the issue off his plate. GUYS I really didnt do all that much, but he was so stressed out. I put the official recognition in the appropriate place so my manager could see it for end of year reviews. I could CRY he was so sweet!

[latetotheparty]

3 hours ago, emma675 said:

Lol, yes, I have an exercise pool in half of my garage. If you google "iPool", you can see what it is. I've had it for almost 6 years and it's the only exercise I've ever stuck with that long. 

OMG I want one! Swimming is the only exercise-y thing I do well and I just love it. 

[SunnyBeBe]

10 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

So after you all got me thinking about xmas decorations, I'm thinking of buying an electric fireplace instead of a tree. When we rebuilt our house after the weather event I decided against having a fireplace because in our original house we only used it a couple of times a year, it limited how we could place our furniture and that wall was always a bit cold because of the fireplace.

I'm having a hard time finding an affordable one I like because so many are TV stands. I want one that looks like a fireplace. This way I could decorate the fireplace for some festive spirit and also have a visually appealing addition to our living room the rest of the year.

Do any of you posters have one? Or have any suggestions?

I ended up with my electric fireplace by accident, but it was perhaps my best item of 2019.  I absolutely love it!  I’ve had wood fireplaces and gas logs, but prefer the electric by far. It’s beautiful to look at...so relaxing...and it’s warm with the heater. You can enjoy the fire without the heat on.   No mess to clean up, no safety worries like gas. Mine is built into the tv stand....grey driftwood color, with glass cabinets on both sides.  I think a fireplace  alone is great, but it will take up a lot of room and will compete with the tv for the vocal point of the room, but some people aren’t big on tv like I am.  I would suggest that you get one with a remote, which I don’t have.  Also, consider that if you want a very large tv, it might not fit the stand/fireplace. Mine holds a 55 inch tv and I want a 65 inch, but I don’t think my stand/fireplace will accommodate it.  The price was AWESOME.  It came from Amazon, but Walmart had the exact same item and my mom got hers there and for an even lower price! She loves hers too.  It makes the room come alive.   
I LOVE those white fireplaces posted upthread! I would prefer one like that, however, they are a little more than I could spend on one. Mine was actually free, from my brother.  I think he payed about under $300.00.
 

 

Edited November 25, 2020 by SunnyBeBe

[Scarlett45]

1 hour ago, ginger90 said:

That’s in response to her name. 😀

 

This is relaxed:

I love your puppy!

[Oldernowiser]

Aw, @Scarlett45...you do sooo much for so  many. I am very, very happy you’re getting some of the recognition you deserve!

[Scarlett45]

12 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

Aw, @Scarlett45...you do sooo much for so  many. I am very, very happy you’re getting some of the recognition you deserve!

You are so sweet. 

 

I admit Im not my best self and my family is finally getting on my last damn nerve. I am very thankful that we are all healthy, safe and together, with a warm comfortable place to sleep and decorate for Christmas, but by golly god damn I just want ONE FUCKING WEEK where no one says "Scarlett45 I need" and I don't have to deal with anyone's bodily fluids but my own. Maybe by the end 2021 I will get that no?

[Oldernowiser]

4 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

I admit Im not my best self and my family is finally getting on my last damn nerve. I am very thankful that we are all healthy, safe and together, with a warm comfortable place to sleep and decorate for Christmas, but by golly god damn I just want ONE FUCKING WEEK where no one says "Scarlett45 I need" and I don't have to deal with anyone's bodily fluids but my own.

Honey, you’re human. Sooner or later, doing everything you do? I only know about the things you post here and I am in awe that you carry on. I would be curled up crying under the bed and refusing to come out.

Can you somehow carve out a little more time for yourself soon? 

 

[Scarlett45]

1 minute ago, Oldernowiser said:

Honey, you’re human. Sooner or later, doing everything you do? I only know about the things you post here and I am in awe that you carry on. I would be curled up crying under the bed and refusing to come out.

Can you somehow carve out a little more time for yourself soon? 

 

When my Mom is an independent adult again, (which will be soon) I will get more "me" time back, and my sister's attitude will likely improve. She LOVES Christmas time so she's usually super good between December-March (new things to play with between the holiday and her birthday).

She has been SO JEALOUS of the attention Mom has been getting, she hates the walker, she's being a brat, I have to be disciplinarian, nursemaid, personal assistant, household manager all at once. M is a good caregiver, she really is, but she isnt the disciplinarian G was (who retired last year). G had EXCELLENT control over my sister's behavior. 

And with no work to occupy my Mom's mind, and no friends to visit because of Covid (her bff/my godmother who has bile duct cancer is staying with her daughter for a little bit) she is BORED, she does Netflix and audiobooks and all that, but lets just say she will be a better human working again in January.

[Oldernowiser]

I am sure you’ve tried everything, but is there  some indoor activity you mom could do with your sister while you lock yourself in another room? Jigsaw puzzles? Board games? Coloring books for grownups? Seems like you have one bored person and one person who needs a lot of attention. Maybe there’s a way to get that combo together somehow?

Sending a big hug and a very large drink!

[Scarlett45]

7 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

I am sure you’ve tried everything, but is there  some indoor activity you mom could do with your sister while you lock yourself in another room? Jigsaw puzzles? Board games? Coloring books for grownups? Seems like you have one bored person and one person who needs a lot of attention. Maybe there’s a way to get that combo together somehow?

Sending a big hug and a very large drink!

Well I still have my own unit upstairs. (they live in the downstairs unit, I live upstairs)

 

My sister is pretty good at entertaining herself- coloring, Disney+ all the xmas movies etc, but every weekend day I still have to bathe her, toileting, changing her linen, making her meals, and then I can "relax" but before I do all that for her, I have been helping Mom, get to the bathroom, bathe, dress, making a meal, in the late afternoon I can finally "relax" but then my Mom wants my attention.

And right now I need to keep them a part because my sister hates the walker. The last two Saturdays my Mom has "moved to my house" to do her exercises in peace, more stairs for me (but yay for exercise), which has meant my sister has been better behaved. (shes always at her worst when Mom is around)

And then Monday-Friday I have work all day, and I do have weekday nights to myself most of the time. (because M has taken care of them during the day). In the afternoons M/W/F I have been driving my Mom to PT, and I work late to make up for the travel time (its just up the street but still its longer than my usual lunch break).

I dont drink alcohol, and instead of eating I have been exercising.

I lost 70lbs in college on WW, and went to law school, stopped doing what I needed to do and it all came back, going to lose it again this time.