Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret. (2023)

[GHScorpiosRule]

7 minutes ago, overtherainbow said:

No doubt Judy Blume had a decent role in the film as well.

She has a five second cameo as she walked her dog, so i wasn’t able to see if she was walking with her real-life husband. And as I stated up thread, I learned she was one of the producers of the movie.

When she was on The View, along with the director, she talked about how the girls were moving their arms in the “we must! We must! We must increase our bust!” scenes wrong! And told one of the other producers that. She was hesitant to tell the director, but the other producer did and they listened to Judy! I really want to meet her! Maybe one day I’ll travel to the Keys and go to her bookstore. 

Just now, Bastet said:

Yes, my version has the belt. 

Thanks for confirming. I guess I’ll have to see how it was changed for the book now.

[lasu]

I reread the book in anticipation of the movie coming out, and the version I bought from Amazon had adhesive pads.  When I first read the book in the early '80s, I not only didn't know what the hell the belts were, I didn't understand what a PERIOD was.  I was reading way above my grade level, lol.  But I read this probably a dozen times throughout my childhood, and while I eventually knew that the belts were an outdated way to use pads, I never understood how they worked.  To be honest, I don't think I still do!

[Bastet]

5 hours ago, lasu said:

while I eventually knew that the belts were an outdated way to use pads, I never understood how they worked.  To be honest, I don't think I still do!

Neither do these women:

 

[Miss Anne Thrope]

Unfortunately, I recall how the belts worked, or often didn't.  They were even more awkward than shown in the video. [[shudder]]

[Bastet]

Does the movie revert to the belts, so that a good portion of the audience is going to be amusingly confused, or are the girls buying adhesive pads like in later editions of the book?  I'm good either way.  So long as they get the "We must, we must, we must increase our bust" routine right.

(By the time I started menstruating, adhesive pads existed, and I quickly switched to tampons anyway, but I was familiar with the belts because of my mom using those before the adhesives came along.  That woman practically had a burning party when she could ditch the belt.)

[GHScorpiosRule]

46 minutes ago, Bastet said:

Does the movie revert to the belts, so that a good portion of the audience is going to be amusingly confused, or are the girls buying adhesive pads like in later editions of the book?

No, the movie doesn’t have them using belts. It’s adhesive pads.

[methodwriter85]

I thought they did a fantastic job. I really loved the scene between Margaret and Laura Danker. It made me think of my own experience in 4th grade when this girl basically ripped me a new one because I was making fun of her for having breasts. Kids are just so mean to each other and they captured that well. Margaret realizing that she and her friends were actually the Mean Girl group was really well done, as well as the ending where Nancy realizes that she lost control of her group when Margaret and Jane go over to Laura.

[anna0852]

16 hours ago, methodwriter85 said:

 Margaret realizing that she and her friends were actually the Mean Girl group was really well done, as well as the ending where Nancy realizes that she lost control of her group when Margaret and Jane go over to Laura.

I did appreciate that the OG Mean Girl is now the mom of a (temporarily) Mean Girl 😁

[methodwriter85]

1 hour ago, anna0852 said:

I did appreciate that the OG Mean Girl is now the mom of a (temporarily) Mean Girl 😁

You could technically call Margaret the Cady Heron of the group. Lol I did like the parallel of Rachel McAdams realizing that she didn't want to keep being free labor to a woman who barely knew her name.

[StatisticalOutlier]

I was 13 in 1970 and never read this book, or any books targeted to people my age--I jumped straight to In Cold Blood and The Catcher in the Rye and for some reason Ian Fleming novels (probably explains a lot).  So I was completely unfamiliar with the Margaret book, but I loved the preview and I loved the movie.  I thought the girl playing Nancy was stellar.  (Although I noticed both Margaret and her mother doing the french tuck on their shirts, and I don't recall anybody doing that back then.)

But the discussion of the movie got me to thinking .  How is it that all of us know "We must increase our bust"?  I think it's the same phenomenon as the "Comet" song; I asked Mr. Outlier if he knew it and he did, even though we grew up in different places ten years apart.  I'm guessing this type of "culture" got spread by military kids, and kids who moved to new towns because their dad got a different job, and then you have kids from different places going to summer camp, and maybe going to visit their grandparents or other relatives and interacting with other kids where the relatives live.

I find it charming that something like "we must increase our bust" or the Comet song was that pervasive, solely through word of mouth, kid to kid.  I'm glad I was part of it.

[choclatechip45]

The copy I read growing up had belts. I remember being really confused I was born in 91 so just had adhesive pads.  

[voiceover]

On 5/11/2023 at 6:36 PM, StatisticalOutlier said:

I find it charming that something like "we must increase our bust" or the Comet song was that pervasive, solely through word of mouth, kid to kid.  I'm glad I was part of it.

Life Without the Internet!  A lot of camp songs, and Scouting songs.  My favorite is “The Men from Nairobi” (“The cannibals may eat us, but they’ll never beat us”), which I learned from two guys in my church youth group.  I still know all the words of all of ‘em.  All that means, I suppose, is that I could win a lot of bar bets.

Apologies for wandering from the topic at hand.

[Shannon L.]

On 5/11/2023 at 6:36 PM, StatisticalOutlier said:

How is it that all of us know "We must increase our bust"? 

I honestly don't remember if I heard if first from a friend or if I read it in the book first.   I had a friend who added (I doubt she made it up, she must have heard it somewhere):  "We must, we must, we must increase our bust. The bigger the better, the tighter the sweater, the boys are depending on us!".  It's a little icky now that I think about it, but it made us laugh back then.

I saw this this afternoon.  I read the book a few times when I was a kid and it's amazing how much of it came back to me when I saw the movie.  From what I can remember of the book, they did a pretty good job making it into a movie.  The performances were great-especially from Abby Ryder Fortson.  I'm hope she does more, she's a great young actress. I loved her as Cassie in Ant-Man, too.

[Browncoat]

I finally got to see this, and I have to say that it is one of the best book adaptations I've seen.  They trimmed well, and added appropriate extras, and really caught the whole vibe of the book.  I loved the addition of Margaret inviting Laura to dance.  I also liked that Sylvia returned from Florida while the other grandparents were still there instead of her returning after the others had left. 

But I still cannot relate to actually wanting to start your period.

[StatisticalOutlier]

59 minutes ago, Browncoat said:

I loved the addition of Margaret inviting Laura to dance.

I liked that she did that.  It apparently didn't happen in the book, and I can guarantee that it never would have happened when I was in 6th grade (1968-1969).   Girls didn't dance together, ever.  Even fast dancing with no touching.  One girl, one boy, no exceptions.

But I'm still glad it happened in the movie.

 

[Browncoat]

1 hour ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

I liked that she did that.  It apparently didn't happen in the book, and I can guarantee that it never would have happened when I was in 6th grade (1968-1969).   Girls didn't dance together, ever.  Even fast dancing with no touching.  One girl, one boy, no exceptions.

But I'm still glad it happened in the movie.

 

It definitely didn't happen in the book, but I remember big groups of us girls dancing together at school functions in the 70s.  Possibly because there were more girls than boys, or maybe just because we wanted to dance and weren't going to wait to be asked.

[Sarahsmile416]

On 5/19/2023 at 11:14 AM, Browncoat said:

I finally got to see this, and I have to say that it is one of the best book adaptations I've seen.  They trimmed well, and added appropriate extras, and really caught the whole vibe of the book.  I loved the addition of Margaret inviting Laura to dance.  I also liked that Sylvia returned from Florida while the other grandparents were still there instead of her returning after the others had left. 

But I still cannot relate to actually wanting to start your period.

Interestingly, that was the one part of the book I did relate to…but I didn’t get mine until I was almost 14, so much behind most of the other kids (or so I feared lol).

Also, my book also had the belts and as an 81’ baby, I was quite confused lol. 

I had my daughter listen to the book on Audible after we watched the movie and she said she liked the movie better 😂  

But now we are listening to Starring Sally J Friedman as Herself (read by Judy Blume!) and she loves it. 

Edited May 20, 2023 by Sarahsmile416

[voiceover]

On 5/19/2023 at 8:14 AM, Browncoat said:

But I still cannot relate to actually wanting to start your period

IIRC, it was always ever about wanting something that was associated with being grown-up.

Of course, all it took was one really awful day of cramps for me to go, “WTF was I thinking??”

Same goes for six months after first wearing a bra.  Hilarious and sad that these two things proved indelible lessons of “Be careful what you wish for…”

[methodwriter85]

On 5/19/2023 at 2:19 PM, Browncoat said:

It definitely didn't happen in the book, but I remember big groups of us girls dancing together at school functions in the 70s.  Possibly because there were more girls than boys, or maybe just because we wanted to dance and weren't going to wait to be asked.

It's a great scene regardless, because it's basically Margaret rejecting Nancy's "rules" and Nancy realizing that was exactly what it was and that she no longer has Jane and Margaret as followers. The movie was pretty clear that Nancy never wanted actual friends, just followers that she could boss around.

[Bookish Jen]

15 hours ago, methodwriter85 said:

It's a great scene regardless, because it's basically Margaret rejecting Nancy's "rules" and Nancy realizing that was exactly what it was and that she no longer has Jane and Margaret as followers. The movie was pretty clear that Nancy never wanted actual friends, just followers that she could boss around.

Nancy was a "frenemy" before "Sex and the City" gave it a name.

Anyway, I wrote a review of the movie:
https://thebookselfblog.wordpress.com/2023/05/18/reading-to-reels-are-you-there-god-its-me-margaret/

[EtheltoTillie]

I never read the book until about two months ago, and I can confirm that I knew about "must improve our bust" long before that.  People did think they could exercise their way to a bigger bust.  Not just youngsters. 

[Phebemarie]

I bought the movie on Amazon Prime last night and really enjoyed it.  Such a sweet movie with an absolutely terrific cast.  I hope its early availability doesn't mean it's doing poorly in theaters.  

I'm glad other people noted the adhesive pad/belt conundrum.  I was wondering if maybe rural Oregon didn't get the new menstruation technology in the early 70s like East coast teens.  

I hope a few of these performances are remembered at Oscar time, but it's going to be hard for the academy to remember such a gem of a movie next January/February when nominations happen.

[luna1122again]

I thought this was completely charming, and somehow fresh and bright, even though it's well worn stuff. Coming of age flicks can get really repetitive but this still felt...new. The cast was just great, especially Abby Ryder Fortson and Elle Graham. What terrific young actors. And Rachel McAdams made me cry. 

I got both my  period and boobs when I was nine, so I never related to the yearning for those things, but I sure remembered the 'we must increase our bust' chant. 

 

[GHScorpiosRule]

It's disappointing that the movie wasn't a huge hit. It's no longer in the theaters near me. And I watched it just last month!

But I'm definitely going to get the dvd when it comes out in three weeks.

[heatherchandler]

On 5/19/2023 at 10:14 AM, Browncoat said:

 

But I still cannot relate to actually wanting to start your period.

I could NOT understand the girls wanting their period or boobs!  I wanted no part of any of that.  I didn’t want to be a grownup.
I was so sad when I had to wear a bra.

[voiceover]

4 hours ago, heatherchandler said:

I could NOT understand the girls wanting their period or boobs!  

Well, to speak from that early-70s perspective…for the second time here🤪

It was The Great Signifier! we didn’t exactly know of…what…(at least *I didn’t, A-student that I was, and neither did my friends), but we sensed it was a crossing-over.

And then of course period & boobs arrived! but, like the shiny Christmas present we’d begged for & were so excited to see under the tree, it eventually lost its fascination.  Even worse: it became an irritating everyday burden. 

Not exactly sexy or empowering, but those words not really in a 70s tween’s vernacular.

[Anela]

I was really hoping that this would come to the drive-in. I hope it comes to one of the streaming services that I have.

[TattleTeeny]

You guys, I read this maybe when I was 10-ish (so maybe 1980) and still to this day I do not understand the belts! I guess it never occurred to me in the intervening 40 years to ask anyone or Google it! That said, I plan to watch it tonight, so maybe I’ll finally learn. The irony is that I no longer need to know about any of these products, haha! 

[WendyCR72]

9 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

You guys, I read this maybe when I was 10-ish (so maybe 1980) and still to this day I do not understand the belts! I guess it never occurred to me in the intervening 40 years to ask anyone or Google it! That said, I plan to watch it tonight, so maybe I’ll finally learn. The irony is that I no longer need to know about any of these products, haha! 

As I said upthread, I read this around 1983, when I was 11. And the belt thing confused me, too. So, I asked my mother. Back in the '60s into the '70s, pads were apparently not sticky on one side as they are now.

So the maxi pads would be held in place by attaching the pad to - I guess clips or something - at the edge of the belt. The belt itself was worn around the waist.

Glad I was BORN in 1972 and never had to deal with THAT!

[chitowngirl]

You looped the ends of the pads around hooks that hung down on the front and back of the belt.

[TattleTeeny]

Yeah, I didn’t learn from the movie after all, so thanks for the explanation. But I’m still curious as to what it looks like. To Google…

I thought it was good, but could have developed some of the relationships a little more. For example, I feel like we see more of the Margaret/Nancy dynamic in the book.

[Miss Anne Thrope]

4 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

Yeah, I didn’t learn from the movie after all, so thanks for the explanation. But I’m still curious as to what it looks like. To Google…

I thought it was good, but could have developed some of the relationships a little more. For example, I feel like we see more of the Margaret/Nancy dynamic in the book.

 

 

The belt thing was addressed pretty explicitly upthread.  I remember it well, and those things were awful, especially in gym or if you played a sport. 

 

On 5/10/2023 at 8:21 PM, Bastet said:

Neither do these women:

 

 

 

 

[TattleTeeny]

Oh my god! That’s just insanity! I keep thinking about trying to manage this in a school’s bathroom room stall, especially if your period shows up in the middle of the day! Yeesh.

Edited June 26, 2023 by TattleTeeny

[voiceover]

I think my mom might have bought me a belt, but I don’t think I ever used it.  Anytime I bought a pad (for a quarter) from the dispenser in the bathroom, it was in a small cardboard box with two (or 4) safety pins.

By my second period, maxi pads had hit the market.  The adhesive strip was often problematic.

I’ve been enjoying this thread but I gotta laugh & shake my head over how period-focused it is.

[Milburn Stone]

On 6/22/2023 at 2:48 PM, luna1122again said:

I thought this was completely charming, and somehow fresh and bright, even though it's well worn stuff. Coming of age flicks can get really repetitive but this still felt...new. The cast was just great...

I may be the only guy on this topic, but/and I sign on to the above. We watched it last night because Mrs. Stone heard about it from a friend, and even though a number of factors might work against us relating--for instance, we were tweens in the early sixties, not early seventies, as was my sister, not to mention that in my case, as I said, I'm a dude--we totally did. 

Movies that are true to human experience can do that.

[Spartan Girl]

Finally rented it tonight. The timing was interesting because I had my own monthly bill this week. When Margaret finally got hers at the end and was saying how she didn’t feel any pain or anything, I just laughed bitterly and said “Buckle up, Margaret, it’s not smooth sailing from here.”

Its been a while since I read the book, so I can’t attest to the differences, but I loved it all the same.

[Boothbay]

I finally understood how menstrual belts worked after seeing “Slums of Beverly Hills”. Jessica Walters demonstrates to Natasha Lyonne how to use them. Thank heavens for the invention of adhesive! What an added hassle to something that’s already a hassle! 

[Frost]

I remember the argument with my mother about buying me a training bra in 7th grade, as there was no there, there.  She suggested I stick with an undershirt!  The horror!  7th grade is when we started to have to change for gym class and every other girl wore a bra.  I don't remember wanting to get my period though.

Maybe because I had an older sister and she never had anything positive to say about it.  I didn't get mine until just before my 16th birthday and I'm so glad!  I had cramps from the very beginning.  It was a little disappointing in the film that none of the girls had any physical discomfort.  However, I was happy nobody ended up with a red stain on their clothes!  

[GHScorpiosRule]

23 minutes ago, Frost said:

I remember the argument with my mother about buying me a training bra in 7th grade, as there was no there, there.  She suggested I stick with an undershirt!  The horror!

😂😂😂😂😂. And I had the opposite problem-I was an early bloomer (developed when I was 10 and in 5th grade) and those training bras just flattened me and it was painful. I had to sneak and “borrow” my Mum’s-and she had those “Cross Your Heart” bras, they lifted and gave support! And they felt so much better! This was of course, before underwire bras.

23 minutes ago, Frost said:

7th grade is when we started to have to change for gym class and every other girl wore a bra

I was such a prude and still self-conscious about the size of my breasts by the time I entered 7th grade, that I changed in the bathroom!😂😂😂

I was disappointed this movie didn’t last longer in the theaters. I had to go out of town for work for a month (mid May-mid June), so by the time I got back, it was no longer playing.

I still think, since this was set in the 70s, and they did such a good job, they should have stuck with the belts! And shown how to use them! They weren’t comfortable and due to my condition, I ended up improvising so I wouldn’t ruin my pants. I might as well have been wearing pampers!

I’m going to watch this on my Blu-ray tonight on my 55” teevee with kettle corn 🍿 so there!!

Edited July 15, 2023 by GHScorpiosRule

[Bastet]

I was going to wait for this to stream on something I have, but decided to use one of my last Netflix DVD rentals (the program ends later this month) so I could see it now.  It arrived yesterday and I've watched it twice already (I watched it, watched the special features, and then watched again this morning to pick up on some details).

I completely understand why Judy Blume finally gave the green light.  This deviated some from the book, as all adaptations do, but not by a lot and it so fundamentally got Margaret. (It's very much a film written and directed by a woman, thank goodness.)  And one of the biggest changes is also one of the best -- giving Barbara a story, making this more of a two-generation film without taking away from Margaret.  I think the film did Nancy a disservice by not including the end of the scene when Nancy really does get her first period, where she tells Margaret she didn't just make it up, she thought she'd gotten it, she just never told the truth later after she realized she hadn't, and that could have easily co-existed with the later scene where Margaret effectively rejects her in favor of asking Laura to dance.  Book Nancy is a little more multi-dimensional than Movie Nancy.

Most of the young actors were great, especially the ones playing Margaret and Nancy.  I found the girl playing Laura a bit of a weak link, which was disappointing when it came time for that great confrontation between her and Margaret, but overall it was a good cast. Watching the special features, I think the girl playing Nancy would annoy me (and know for a fact the kid playing Bennie would have me running for the hills), but I liked hearing the Margaret actor's thoughts and the surprisingly astute observations from the guy playing Moose.  (Sorry, kids, I'm too lazy to go look up your names.)

Great music, too (Hans Zimmer's score, and the choice of songs).

Edited September 9, 2023 by Bastet

[greekmom]

14 hours ago, Bastet said:

but I liked hearing the Margaret actor's thoughts and the surprisingly astute observations from the guy playing Moose.  (Sorry, kids, I'm too lazy to go look up your names.)

Great music, too (Hans Zimmer's score, and the choice of songs).

You've peaked my curiosity. What were the observations about Moose?

[Bastet]

7 hours ago, greekmom said:

You've peaked my curiosity. What were the observations about Moose?

He wasn't talking about Moose, which was nice (I didn't care about Moose in the book, and wasn't any more interested in him in the movie), he was talking about Margaret and girls that age in general, and how this film represents them, and had good insight for a guy.

[aghst]

Saw this a couple of days on a flight.

Happened to have Wifi so I looked up the reviews and saw it was rated very high.

I didn't read the book -- guy here -- but the title had some familiar ring to it.

When Barbara's parents reached out it was moving, until the father wanted to know which religion Margaret was going to practice.

 

[Brn2bwild]

Watched the movie this evening and loved it.  I was a Laura at that age (developed before most of my class and got my period at age 11), though I was not blessed with her height.  The Nancies of my year would follow me into the bathroom and try to catch glimpses of me changing my pads.  It was horrible.  That comment about checking waste baskets for menstrual pads brought it all back.  Hooray for Margaret for having enough confidence in herself to break away from Nancy's toxic thinking.

[Phebemarie]

I've noticed a few end of the year "best of" lists have included Are You There, God?  I really hope the movie gets a little acknowledgement at awards time.  Kathy Bates easily deserves a nomination for best supporting actor.  

[Bastet]

47 minutes ago, Phebemarie said:

I've noticed a few end of the year "best of" lists have included Are You There, God?  I really hope the movie gets a little acknowledgement at awards time. 

I'd love to see it get writing nominations from any organization that has a best adapted screenplay category; this is one of the most faithful book adaptations I've come across, and almost all of the few changes are for the better.  The film's Nancy is a little more one-dimensional than the book's (as I said before, I think it was a mistake omitting the part where we learn she wasn't lying when she first said she got her period, because she thought she did, it's just that when she realized she didn't, she never corrected her announcement), but the actor playing her is so wonderful it's not an issue.  And the decision to give Barbara her own storyline was perfect.  I, unfortunately, don't anticipate Kelly Fremon Craig getting any Best Director nods for this (it is, after all, a story written and directed by a woman, about women, plus, it came out a lifetime ago in the world of Hollywood and didn't do very well at the box office), but maybe there's a chance for writing.

[Phebemarie]

Well,  I guess I shouldn't be surprised that they didn't get a single nomination this morning.  

[SoMuchTV]

Hey! This thread popped back up as I was watching the dvd I finally got to the top of the list for at the library. When that happens with a movie it usually means it’s going to be on a streaming service I have soon. But the dvd has a boatload of extras so I’m glad I got it. 

[Bastet]

I think the Writers Guild Awards were this film's last chance to pick up a much-deserved award for best adapted screenplay, but no dice; American Fiction won on Sunday.  Margaret was one of the five nominees, at least, but the lack of a single major writing award is highly aggravating, especially that such a faithful adaptation of such a beloved book about a young boy, written and directed by a man, might well have enjoyed a sweep. 

Edited April 17 by Bastet