S12.E13: Unanswered Questions

[bichonblitz]

These couples crack me up! 

Their meetings with the experts:

Gin and Erik- we connected right away. We really get along great! Except: dog dicipline, drinking, partying, living arrangements, having kids, not compromising, but yeah, we're good!

Clara and Ry- We're a 10! Except: religious differences (dealbreaker for Ry), the word Love. I love him, he won't say he loves me, and oh yeah, Ry won't fuck me! 

Haley- He's great! He has a good job, is stable, sweet, I want to keep trying. No, girl, you don't. 

Chris- newsflash buddy. We ALL hate your face!

Edited April 8, 2021 by bichonblitz

[AnnMarie17]

16 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

Something is "off" with Erik.  There's a desperation about him and it's strange that he would immediately fall head over heels in love with Virginia (or any woman).   I would love to know what his ex wife has to say about their marriage.

I say that every week...I'd *love* to hear from his ex wife!

[Madding crowd]

If Ryan wanted a religious virgin he could find one on a Christian dating site. If he wants a marriage without sex, he should have gone on the unmatchable show because it will be very difficult to find a wife that doesn’t want sex. And Clara saying she dated men of various races doesn’t mean she is a slut. 

Wanting or not wanting children is one of the most important questions they could ask so I’m finding it hard to believe they asked any questions if they omitted this one. I don’t remember any of the criteria on how they matched people this year, but they didn’t do a good job with any of them. Vincent and Brianna will likely stay together but ‘on paper’ they aren’t a match either. 
 

[gonecrackers]

VA is young but has some baggage. Her 20s are a good time to deal with it. She has time, a supportive sister, & a large friend group. Makes no sense why she did this show at this point in her life.

She got Rocky because she was depressed & he's been a comfort. Yes, she's neglected training, but he's not a bad dog. He seems cute, sweet, playful & friendly.

Then this condescending wanna be father-figure dude comes along, with zero training skills (as displayed), & outwardly annoyed by the creature who has been a comfort to her. She's taking it personally, as would I with how it was presented. Training could be a fun thing, & bonding for all. But it won't be if Erik continues with the wrong attitude.

Erik also says his dog has had training, but he had no idea what he was doing with Rocky & I felt, was kind of hateful towards him. That won't ever work. It's rubbing off on VA, because then she tried to get Rocky to "Lie down!", which again isn't going to work. I feel like the dog will end up confused, & hopefully not become aggressive due to the strain in the home & attitudes towards him; they could fuck up a good dog. Are they both too proud to spend a few minutes a day on YT looking up positive trainers - I can think of 3 off the top of my head. It would benefit them all.

And where is Erik's dog in all this, because Erik "trained" him so he should be there, acting perfect at all times. Or maybe he's concerned Rocky will be a bad influence (that actually can happen).

VA mentioned in a past episode being upset because she hardly sees her cats anymore. I've read elsewhere Erik is allergic to cats. Again, I was completely disgusted by this show & their 'experts'. W. T. F.!  So he's allergic now she's required to give up her beloved cats? Not to devalue humans, but, these lovely creatures have been an ongoing comfort to her. He's come in out of nowhere & seemingly just caused her more stress.

But I'm not going to say she's right in just wanting to party either. And he has a point in that being a pilot when he's home he just wants to be with his wife. But his delivery is not just bad, it's quite damaging.

Edited April 8, 2021 by gonecrackers

[qtpye]

28 minutes ago, Retired at last said:

I wish Pastor Cal had been as honest to Clara's face as he was in the TH when he was aghast at her saying their marriage is a 10. are with Ryan. Once Pepper asked him if he has even asked Clara about how she feels, he seemed surprised to think he had never thought of that. Then when he asked, he only asked about how she felt about him taking it slow, not how she may feel rejected. I don't see this working out long term (unless they agree off camera that they will have an open marriage, if she keeps it quiet. Oh wait - that is not part of her skill set).

I think the only time Haley has been honest this whole show was last night when she realized that the only reason she is pretending to hang on is because otherwise, that makes HER a failure, and we can't have that. I am sick of her fake tears and attitude, but she did look as pretty as I have seen her.

Chris is despicable and disgusting. Paige, who I don't think is attractive, seems to have finally gotten the idea that it is not going to work. (Which makes that clip that she showed of Decision Day even more laughable.) I don't know how she was before all this, but she seems to be totally depressed with no affect at all. Her choice of clothes is horrible, but I guess she is trying to spotlight her assets. Unfortunately, her assets don't include dignity or personality.

Brianna and Vinnie are boring. She is the only one of the brides I think is pretty. She is gorgeous, but the rest are average, at best. Not that that is a bad thing - makes them more normal! But, Brianna is exceptionally pretty. I hope they are able to get past her health issues to decide how to have a family. I agree with everyone that this info should have come out BEFORE the matching. Kids, religion, pets, etc. should all be strongly considered first.

I didn't like how neither Erik or Ginny were honest about their relationship. They are both very unhappy and not about trivial matters. Yes, getting and being pregnant can be scary, but usually, the end result of having a baby is worth it, but not to Ginny. She can blame her upbringing as much as she wants, but until she accepts that the reason she doesn't want to get/be pregnant is because she would have to stop drinking, there will be no real resolution - either way. Erik can say he realizes that he cannot communicate or deliver a message the right way, but he does nothing to change it. He IS controlling and condescending. He desperately wants to be married and is going to keep trying to mold her into what a wife "should be," but she is not going to be easily molded. She was too young and immature to have been chosen in the first place. Plus, she's an alcoholic. I don't see them together long term, either. At least, happily.

 

I think its funny that Virginia understands that she will not be a good parent without significant changes and Eric does not realize this because she is "so good with kids".

Eric, you hate the way she is with her dog, know she wants to be partying every weekend, and that passing out drunk on couches is a fairly common thing for her. What about this makes you say, "Wow, she will be a great mom and we should have kids immediately"?

She first needs to work on her issues and /or get the partying out of her system before even thinking about being a parent.

 

3 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

These couples crack me up! 

Their meetings with the experts:

Gin and Erik- we connected right away. We really get along great! Except: dog dicipline, drinking, partying, living arrangements, having kids, not compromising, but yeah, we're good!

Clara and Ry- We're a 10! Except: religious differences (dealbreaker for Ry), the word Love. I love him, he won't say he loves me, and oh yeah, Ry won't fuck me! 

Haley- He's great! He has a good job, is stable, sweet, I want to keep trying. No, girl, you don't. 

Chris- newsflash buddy. We ALL hate your face!

A lot of these couples want to present their best face to the experts and seem to forget the cameras catch many things. We all saw Clara loudly bemoaning that Ryan has left her very sexually frustrated but the marriage is a 10....okay.

[DrewPaul2010]

Quote

Real cute that Chris was so horrified by Paige's looks that he could only have sex with her 3 or 4 times in a couple days. Must have been a real sacrifice.

I realize looks are very subjective but Paige is a nice looking woman. She has nice eyes, beautiful complexion. Its no surprise Chris is completely shallow. No I don't think the mother of his child has any intentions of hanging her hat with that loser.

Quote

I can completely understand why Virginia shuts down or deflects when Erik talks to her. He lectures, makes demands and refuses to compromise. He doesn't say, "I think we could help Rocky learn patience and some commands if we work together with a trainer," he basically says, "your dog has no manners and he's MY DOG now and you have to do exactly as I say."

Erik took correction on that issue so he's not a complete beat the chest I'm the man and do as I say. One weekend a month is asking too much of your spouse? The kids issue is an irreconcilable one. There is no compromise except maybe how many you want. I don't know if they can remain married and put that issue on the back burner.

[Spectator]

I think Erik and Virginia are kidding themselves...they have so many issues in their relationship they need to work out still. Child bearing. Child rearing. Pet rearing. Social behavior. Social calendars. Social drinking. Excessive drinking. What it means to be married. The list goes on and on.  
 

They both talk about how the good times are so good but the bad times are so bad. But they neglect to see that nearly every time they have any sort of a real discussion about a real issue it quickly devolves into a bad time. Always. They handle conflict terribly. Erik gets controlling and Virginia breaks down or shuts down. I can’t imagine these two will ever have a meeting of the minds on how to raise and discipline their kids if they can’t even agree on how to train and discipline a pet. I’m betting that left to their own devices, Virginia’s kid would be the kind of kid who would run around like a maniac in a restaurant banging on the tables of other diners and throwing food while Erik’s kid would get scolded for using the wrong fork to eat his dinner or for placing his napkin on the table instead of his chair after politely excusing himself to use the restroom. They are so different in their approach to life.
 

And I couldn’t help but notice when Erik brought up drinking, Virginia made multiple visible hard swallows. Like a cartoon character who gets cornered. Just the topic makes her so nervous. She immediately denied the role that alcohol has played in their arguments then completely shut down the idea of not having big discussions while drinking. And Erik didn’t even broach the topic Dr Pepper suggested, that they not drink at all for a stretch of time. Her denial and anger are textbook signs of a problem. The woman appears to be so dependent on alcohol that the mere idea of not drinking causes her anxiety. This is a very real issue. I hope Virginia gets some help with her drinking (and her anxiety, as they appear to be very tied together) otherwise it will negatively impact every aspect of her life. I’ve seen it happen. And obviously alcoholism and pregnancy don’t blend. She has a long way to go before even considering having a child. I’m surprised Erik doesn’t see that actually.

[DrewPaul2010]

2 hours ago, NoWhammies said:

If I had to classify how I "found" Chris's face, I'd say punchable...

I think Pastor Cal was about ready to throw some blows...

[Devvie]

AMEN.  Finally, experts laying it on the line and addressing problems.  

I really hope Erik and V go their separate ways.  She is - probably - genetically predisposed to alcoholism. I now remember her dad bringing a flask to her wedding and giving her a long swig.  And saying her girlfriends can't keep up with her - her liver processes alcohol TOO WELL.  ("Abundant evidence indicates that alcoholism is a complex genetic disease, with variations in a large number of genes affecting risk.") Erik is starting to enable which is sad. Pepper said to say "why can't we stop drinking for a while and see how that increases our communication." He backed off on that and said instead "The biggest thing I've gotten from this whole thing with her [Pepper] is drinking being a problem for us, I guess, in arguments." Virginia says the argument would have been the same.  BUT that long pause and visible gulp and "I'm not talking about it" spoke volumes. Then her inability to give him a weekend?! And she started to lose control.  I predict, she will now start hiding her drinking. A healthy person would have said "Yeah, let's give that a try". There's a HUGE chance if she stops drinking (cuz I'm not sure she can just cut down) the things Erik likes will disappear. This ain't my first rodeo. 

Paige... she just doesn't get it.  She giggled when Pepper told her Chris was a narcissist.  But I was so glad Pepper didn't mince words and said "he did it to hurt you".  But Paige is still wondering "why".  People like Paige are frustrating because they don't understand there are bad people in the world.  There are people who wake up every day and think "who can I hurt"? 

Chris... OMG.  Chris thinks he handled things to the best of his ability?... I wish PC had responded "Then your abilities are very limited." It has been interesting to watch a narcissist in action though. People throw the word around too much these days... but Dr. Schwartz is a professional and qualified to really dx him. 

Don't think V and B's budget is out of line because they are just - at this point - looking at all their expenses.  Sharing housing will cut those down.  She is a professional engineer. Might have school loans.  And Civil Engineering is very formal - she might have to wear suits.  (I worked in a College of Engineering and the national conferences are all suits and ties.)  And given it's still primarily men, she has the added burden of commanding respect. I noticed on her "flashback" she had removed the expensive braids. Both of them really try.  But I get the kid thing.  It is a deal breaker. 

Haley and Jake.  Let's pull the plug.  I actually feel sorry for both of them. 

[humbleopinion]

25 minutes ago, gonecrackers said:

And where is Erik's dog in all this, because Erik "trained" him so he should be there, acting perfect at all times. Or maybe he's concerned Rocky will be a bad influence (that actually can happen).

 

(heard on the building's over head loudspeakers)...Doctor Freud...Doctor Sigmund Freud..paging Doctor Freud....

Erik means if she would just stop fighting him and obeyed him he could train her to be the perfect spouse...

Ginny's drinking buddies are the bad influence...if they weren't so readily available for drinkathons and nightly bar hopping she would be sober and at home knitting him socks....

He desperately is making lemonade...the spiked overly boozed up version of lemonade

 

Edited April 8, 2021 by humbleopinion

[qtpye]

1 minute ago, humbleopinion said:

Doctor Freud...Doctor Sigmund Freud..paging Doctor Freud....

Erik means if she would just stop fighting him and obeyed him he could train her to be the perfect spouse...

Ginny's drinking buddies are the bad influence...if they weren't so readily available for drinkathons and nightly bar hopping she would be sober and at home knitting him socks....

He desperately is making lemonade...the spiked overly boozed up version of lemonade

 

I am not calling Virginia an alcoholic because I am not qualified to make that judgement but one of the first things they teach addicts when they successfully complete rehab is that they totally need to get a new friend group. If Virginia is an alcoholic, then the friends that enable her behavior really have to be cut out of her life.

There is some sort of statistic that says you will be more likely to be overweight if your friends are overweight rather than your parents.

[Boo Boo]

1 hour ago, Retired at last said:

I wish Pastor Cal had been as honest to Clara's face as he was in the TH when he was aghast at her saying their marriage is a 10. are with Ryan. Once Pepper asked him if he has even asked Clara about how she feels, he seemed surprised to think he had never thought of that. Then when he asked, he only asked about how she felt about him taking it slow, not how she may feel rejected. I don't see this working out long term (unless they agree off camera that they will have an open marriage, if she keeps it quiet. Oh wait - that is not part of her skill set).

I think the only time Haley has been honest this whole show was last night when she realized that the only reason she is pretending to hang on is because otherwise, that makes HER a failure, and we can't have that. I am sick of her fake tears and attitude, but she did look as pretty as I have seen her.

Chris is despicable and disgusting. Paige, who I don't think is attractive, seems to have finally gotten the idea that it is not going to work. (Which makes that clip that she showed of Decision Day even more laughable.) I don't know how she was before all this, but she seems to be totally depressed with no affect at all. Her choice of clothes is horrible, but I guess she is trying to spotlight her assets. Unfortunately, her assets don't include dignity or personality.

Brianna and Vinnie are boring. She is the only one of the brides I think is pretty. She is gorgeous, but the rest are average, at best. Not that that is a bad thing - makes them more normal! But, Brianna is exceptionally pretty. I hope they are able to get past her health issues to decide how to have a family. I agree with everyone that this info should have come out BEFORE the matching. Kids, religion, pets, etc. should all be strongly considered first.

I didn't like how neither Erik or Ginny were honest about their relationship. They are both very unhappy and not about trivial matters. Yes, getting and being pregnant can be scary, but usually, the end result of having a baby is worth it, but not to Ginny. She can blame her upbringing as much as she wants, but until she accepts that the reason she doesn't want to get/be pregnant is because she would have to stop drinking, there will be no real resolution - either way. Erik can say he realizes that he cannot communicate or deliver a message the right way, but he does nothing to change it. He IS controlling and condescending. He desperately wants to be married and is going to keep trying to mold her into what a wife "should be," but she is not going to be easily molded. She was too young and immature to have been chosen in the first place. Plus, she's an alcoholic. I don't see them together long term, either. At least, happily.

 

Maybe she just doesn't want kids and there's nothing wrong with that. I don't fault anyone who doesn't want kids.  I also think society puts undue pressure on women to have children because the "end result of having a baby is worth it."  It isn't worth it for everyone .  If her family was fucked up, that's certainly a good reason.  If she doesn't want to have a kid b/c she'd have to stop drinking, also a good reason.  . 

Or maybe she's seen how controlling and condescending he is and decided kids is not what she wants with him.

This show should not be putting together couples where having children is so important they want family NOW and the other person it's a question mark for when or if.  

 

[gonecrackers]

11 hours ago, endure said:

Haley says she wants to try every week and every week she totally disappoints.  I can understand it happening,  that you’re not attracted in any way to the partner you’re matched with, kind of like a blind date.  Honestly I don’t know why he still has expectations too, they’re just fulfilling their contract at this point I assume.

 

He's had it with her fake for a while now, & why he hasn't played ball with her questions. Pulling personal info out of him reg. the last 10 yrs was shitty on her part, because she doesn't really care & did it for the show. He was obviously put off & hesitant about answering, for good reason. Why bother when she's not even around when the cameras leave? Geez I'd hate playing this stupid game too. That said he could just say fuck it, I'm out. At this point I don't think anyone would blame him, & most would probably be relieved not to see their awkward segments anymore. But next week it's all fun & games for these two...🙄

[gonecrackers]

6 hours ago, Silver Bells said:

2.  Clara should marry Jake.  They both have funny noses and will have sex every night

3.  Haley should marry Erik.  She’ll ride shotgun in the plane with Erik and he will ask her all questions of her travels, and she would tell him all about hers.

5.  All useless experts should be fired.

6.  Blowhard Chris should marry his baby Momma and be respectful.

Clara & Jake would be a nice combo, but Jake's probably too white boy for her exotic tastes.

Haley & Erik might work well too as he probably couldn't pull off the father crap with her. Travel, prissiness, & well-behaved dogs would be in common. But Haley would need to give him a chance, which is not really her thing.

In total agreement with #5.

Chris shouldn't marry anyone.

[Spectator]

Although Brianna and Vincent seem to be, by far, the most stable couple at the moment (the bar is mighty low though!), I still see huge red flags. This is probably an unpopular opinion but I fear Vincent is a poser. I think he wants to present an image that he’s a real go-getter and that he’s the best...the best provider, the best dancer, the most suave romantic, the most entrepreneurial...but in fact he’s riddled with insecurities and and fears of inadequacy and is deathly afraid that his true self will be revealed. 
 

I think money, ambition, career, etc. are going to be real issues for these two. Vincent wants to be the big man and be the provider in the family, which is admirable, but his current income doesn’t enable him to fulfill that role. I think he is one of those guys who is a bit lost, career-wise. Sure, he “started a new business” a couple months before he got married, and it may end up being a total home run (I know nothing about the demand for a “car locator”, or whatever he is, but it sounds like a big lift) but I’ve also seen lots of guys hide behind the idea of launching a business when they find themselves to be out of options in their respective careers. It’s an ego thing. They can’t tolerate being perceived as lazy or unemployed or between careers or in a dead end job, so they manufacture what appears to be an admirable, entrepreneurial path that ultimately just ends up being smoke and mirrors. Could it work out? Sure. But is he deathly afraid that it won’t and Brianna will perceive him as a direction-less failure? Absolutely. And watching his wife create her list of monthly expenses seemed to send him into panic mode...how can he ever boast about being the provider when his wife is racking up over $100k a year in expenses that he knows he can’t cover? So his immediate, defensive response was to boast that he’d already lived that big life with the fancy cars (although I’m pretty sure he admitted that a prior GF left him because he didn’t make enough money, so I’m not convinced that he’s ever really lived that large of a lifestyle...again, the words of a poser). He said instead he wanted to live a scaled back life with his wife. A lifestyle where he knew he wouldn’t have to bust his hump day and night just to keep up. It’s not a bad thing, but I think it’s quite different from Brianna, who seems really driven and goes after what she wants full speed. I don’t get the impression that Vincent is cut out for the 24/7 level of commitment that is typically required of an entrepreneur. Just as an example, I don’t know a single successful entrepreneur who likes to sleep late...it’s not in their DNA. And typical entrepreneurs need thick skin because they will almost surely get knocked down again and again on their whole way up and they have to get back up even stronger than before, but Vincent doesn’t seem to be able to handle being knocked down even the tiniest bit (the dancing, the champagne bottle, etc.). I think it’s a show and occasionally he lets his insecurities about his house of cards show. Bottom line: I don’t think Vincent is the guy he is presenting himself to be to Brianna. I am so hopeful they make it, but I’m afraid that when the cameras stop rolling and real life begins, Brianna might not be as wowed by Vincent as she is so far. It’s very hard for a driven go-getter to partner with anyone other than the same (thus her insistence that he wake up early...that’s in her DNA, not his).

 

I do wish them the best though and I really hope I’m wrong!

 

[Ilovepie]

Ryan and Clara - 10 out of 10? Please. They are a zero out of ten in terms of honest communication. She is lying about how unhappy she really is and he is lying about how important his religion is. I don't think he's asexual or gay or a virgin, but I do think he's trying to keep things private and I think he's taking a page out of good old Jamie Otis's book and waiting until after decision day to fully commit, and that includes intercourse. I will say this: He is a master at deflection. I don't know what is worse to him - being unequally yoked (biblical term for marriage to a non-christian) or getting a divorce. I guess we'll see.......

Erik and VA - good grief, that was painful. She needs help. And a divorce. She is not ready for marriage in any way. If you can't understand why your husband wants you to come home every night you shouldn't be married. And she needs an intervention by more than just Erik.

I don't need to see Haley crying. Girl, shut up. You did not try. He's outed her by saying she leaves as soon as filming has ended, so no. It does make me feel sad for Jake that he thinks this is his last chance for finding someone. Dude! You are a fairly handsome, fit, gainfully employed stable human and only 38 - it's not over!!! I think these two are just mismatched. That is all. These two pots need to find different lids. They don't go together at all.

I don't know enough about Briana's health issues, but I would think if she does eventually want kids, it would be better to do it while she is young? It might be classified as high risk, but she says she does want kids, just not as fast as Vinnie, so maybe she needs to find out the risk involved and make an educated decision about it.

Fuck Chris. The rage I felt listening him of all people saying Paige has an ugly face!!!! I'm getting mad right now typing this. I said it before and I'll say it again - what a garbage human being.

And finally, how hard is it AT THE BARE MINIMUM to match people who are on the same page in terms of kids??? It's the EASIEST thing to do and yet they fucked it up MULTIPLE TIMES just this season alone. Great job "experts"!

Edited April 8, 2021 by Ilovepie

[Crashcourse]

One thing I noticed is that Clara likes to throw her leg across Ryan's lap when they're sitting together.  He holds her leg like a side of beef and doesn't seem to be at all aroused.     

[humbleopinion]

Brianna..there aren't enough tent poles in Atlanta for you to prop Vinny up...

If he can't out earn your salary then there will be hell to pay....we will see post Covid how his business bounces back...

 

5 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

 

 

Haley Jake

these two are just mismatched. That is all. These two pots need to find different lids. They don't go together at all.

 

Jake is a caste iron skillet needing a glass/caste iron lid which are readily available and just needs to be found in the right diameter versus Haley is a crepe pan which functions without and never meant to have a lid...

Edited April 8, 2021 by humbleopinion

[princelina]

4 hours ago, LakeGal said:

Brianna is bossy.  I keep remembering that.  She tells Vinny how to compromise.  But I don't see her doing it.  She wants him so go to bed and wake up when she wants.  She is the one that wants him to go to bed early but he can't watch TV or his phone in bed.  What was she compromising?

Oh I forgot about that - totally Team Vinnie on that one!  I have never been able to fall asleep early, even for the many years I had to go to work early, and I certainly never would have agreed to going to bed with her.  People who get up early because then you "have the whole day" never give a good response to what they do with that whole day anyway 😄 I can do that stuff at 10:00pm anyway 😄 

[Ilovepie]

7 minutes ago, princelina said:

Oh I forgot about that - totally Team Vinnie on that one!  I have never been able to fall asleep early, even for the many years I had to go to work early, and I certainly never would have agreed to going to bed with her.  People who get up early because then you "have the whole day" never give a good response to what they do with that whole day anyway 😄 I can do that stuff at 10:00pm anyway 😄 

Same! Some people are night owls and some are early birds. If it doesn't affect his job then he can keep a different bed time than her! I loathe getting up at the crack of dawn when I don't have to get kids off to school or go to work!

[bichonblitz]

I really want to know how early Bri wakes up and how late Vincent wants to sleep. If it's her choice to wake up at 6:30 or so on the weekend and he wants to sleep until 8 or 9 then I say shut up and grow up! Now, if he's sleeping in until 2pm then there might be an issue......

This is young people problems. When you have been married for a long time you don't give a crap how early or late your spouse sleeps. There are so many other challenging daily life issues going on. Pick your battles, kids! 

[Devvie]

16 hours ago, Adeejay said:

Every time I think that Chris couldn’t possibly do or say something that would make me hate him more, he surprises me.  “Of the millions of beautiful, black, white and Latina women in Atlanta, this is what you chose for me?”  The nerve of that cro magnon looking mfer.  He kept saying he doesn’t like her features.  What the heck does that mean?

You forgot some words.. "black Queens, white Queens, Latina Queens".  Is it just that Chris fancies himself a King or does Queen denote something else?  Well, I googled and it's rather controversial.  https://blavity.com/twitter-argues-about-calling-black-women-queens/twitter-argues-about-calling-black-women-queens?category1=black-twitter&category2=culture

The nutshell:  "Twitter has been separated into factions over the word queen. Is it a term that's meant to empower, show respect to, and uplift Black women? Or is it a box, controlling the perception of how a woman should or should not behave, holding her to a set of traits and responsibilities that Black men feel are worthy of receiving that title. 

Hmmmmmmm... given that it's Chris I'm guessing he's using it in the BOX way!  He is the devil. 

[seacliffsal]

I was most disappointed by the "experts" when Pastor Cal did not address Virginia's pregnancy concerns, but even more by the fact that he did not address her drinking issues along with spending the night at the houses of her male friends.  Dr. Pepper put it on Eric to address lessening the drinking, but really, I think it's the role of the "professional" counselors/experts.  How is Eric (or most people) equipped to help Virginia understand the role of alcohol in her life.  I do agree that the drinking makes their arguments even worse.  I also think that some of Eric's controlling behavior is due to his inability to really address Virginia's drinking and how that impacts them (i.e. the always being out with friends, not training Rocky [how can one really train their dog when they admit to sleeping passing out at friend's houses multiple times a week?], etc.).  For all of his desire to "know" how marriage and relationships work, I think he knows that he is in way over his head but doesn't know how to get out.

Every season I am hugely irritated by the "experts" when they don't use the desire/no desire for children as a basis for putting people together.  I feel the same way when they ignore beliefs about religion.  

Haley seemed really surprised when Dr. Pepper asked her about how much SHE was willing change for Jake as opposed to her just expected Jake to change for her.  She looked as shocked as she did last week when her tarot reading friend told her that Jake was a good match for her.  I think Haley feels sorry for herself and therefore expects others to feel sorry for her.

I just don't know or care about Paige's motivations.  I did notice she said she would move forward and wait for the man God wants her to marry.  But, but, but, I thought she had been telling us for weeks that God wanted her to be married to Chris.  Did she maybe inadvertantly admit that maybe SHE chose to go on the show and it wasn't God's will for her after all?

Chris is so full of it-tried to blame all of his decisions and actions on others.  "It's YOUR fault..." to Pastor Cal that Chris didn't like Paige's face.  Oh, and big, important man "I need to buy her (the ex) a house..."  How are you going to do that without Paige's money?  I can hardly wait to hear about the car being repossessed...(I know that makes me super mean).  I wish all three "experts" had been in the room and laid into Chris.  THAT would have been classic.

[DrewPaul2010]

12 minutes ago, Spectator said:

Although Brianna and Vincent seem to be, by far, the most stable couple at the moment (the bar is mighty low though!), I still see huge red flags. This is probably an unpopular opinion but I fear Vincent is a poser. I think he wants to present an image that he’s a real go-getter and that he’s the best...the best provider, the best dancer, the most suave romantic, the most entrepreneurial...but in fact he’s riddled with insecurities and and fears of inadequacy and is deathly afraid that his true self will be revealed. 
 

I think money, ambition, career, etc. are going to be real issues for these two. Vincent wants to be the big man and be the provider in the family, which is admirable, but his current income doesn’t enable him to fulfill that role. I think he is one of those guys who is a bit lost, career-wise. Sure, he “started a new business” a couple months before he got married, and it may end up being a total home run (I know nothing about the demand for a “car locator”, or whatever he is, but it sounds like a big lift) but I’ve also seen lots of guys hide behind the idea of launching a business when they find themselves to be out of options in their respective careers. It’s an ego thing. They can’t tolerate being perceived as lazy or unemployed or between careers or in a dead end job, so they manufacture what appears to be an admirable, entrepreneurial path that ultimately just ends up being smoke and mirrors. Could it work out? Sure. But is he deathly afraid that it won’t and Brianna will perceive him as a direction-less failure? Absolutely. And watching his wife create her list of monthly expenses seemed to send him into panic mode...how can he ever boast about being the provider when his wife is racking up over $100k a year in expenses that he knows he can’t cover? So his immediate, defensive response was to boast that he’d already lived that big life with the fancy cars (although I’m pretty sure he admitted that a prior GF left him because he didn’t make enough money, so I’m not convinced that he’s ever really lived that large of a lifestyle...again, the words of a poser). He said instead he wanted to live a scaled back life with his wife. A lifestyle where he knew he wouldn’t have to bust his hump day and night just to keep up. It’s not a bad thing, but I think it’s quite different from Brianna, who seems really driven and goes after what she wants full speed. I don’t get the impression that Vincent is cut out for the 24/7 level of commitment that is typically required of an entrepreneur. Just as an example, I don’t know a single successful entrepreneur who likes to sleep late...it’s not in their DNA. And typical entrepreneurs need thick skin because they will almost surely get knocked down again and again on their whole way up and they have to get back up even stronger than before, but Vincent doesn’t seem to be able to handle being knocked down even the tiniest bit (the dancing, the champagne bottle, etc.). I think it’s a show and occasionally he lets his insecurities about his house of cards show. Bottom line: I don’t think Vincent is the guy he is presenting himself to be to Brianna. I am so hopeful they make it, but I’m afraid that when the cameras stop rolling and real life begins, Brianna might not be as wowed by Vincent as she is so far. It’s very hard for a driven go-getter to partner with anyone other than the same (thus her insistence that he wake up early...that’s in her DNA, not his).

 

I do wish them the best though and I really hope I’m wrong!

 

I think you're wrong : ). These are issues common to all marriages and none of them are deal breakers. High blood pressure is a concern but thousands of woman with high blood pressure survive and have healthy babies. I think her real concern is her carefree life and figure may take a hit. Its a shame that being a mother with children is almost looked down upon. What she doesn't know is the joy a child brings. Couples in surveys consistently say the best years of their lives was during the child raising years. Its the busiest years of your life so typically you have no time to dote on your own woes. This probably explains why divorces occur when the children leave. 

[DrewPaul2010]

Quote

I was most disappointed by the "experts" when Pastor Cal did not address Virginia's pregnancy concerns, but even more by the fact that he did not address her drinking issues along with spending the night at the houses of her male friends.  Dr. Pepper put it on Eric to address lessening the drinking, but really, I think it's the role of the "professional" counselors/experts.  How is Eric (or most people) equipped to help Virginia understand the role of alcohol in her life.  I do agree that the drinking makes their arguments even worse.  I also think that some of Eric's controlling behavior is due to his inability to really address Virginia's drinking and how that impacts them (i.e. the always being out with friends, not training Rocky [how can one really train their dog when they admit to sleeping passing out at friend's houses multiple times a week?], etc.).  For all of his desire to "know" how marriage and relationships work, I think he knows that he is in way over his head but doesn't know how to get out.

This is where the 8 week artificial horizon can hurt a potentially great marriage. They should look at it as a renewal of their vows and commitments unless the union is truly bad like in Paige's case.

Eric should be patient and love the bad habits out of her. If he puts his stake in the ground and says I'm here for the long haul Virginia, I take you as is where is, I would wage in a year or two she'll lose interest in hanging with the boys. She'll start seeing friends raising families. Woman in general mature faster than guys. If he can show this love and commitment and ride it out for a while he will have the wife of his dreams. She will spoil him like she spoils Rocky.

 

 

[Crashcourse]

3 hours ago, Retired at last said:

I think the only time Haley has been honest this whole show was last night when she realized that the only reason she is pretending to hang on is because otherwise, that makes HER a failure, and we can't have that. I am sick of her fake tears and attitude, but she did look as pretty as I have seen her.

As much as I don't like Jake, I think you're spot on about Haley.  I liked her but I'm getting sick of her fake ass tears and "poor me" attitude.  She doesn't want to be the bad one, so she's pretending to be trying.  She does look much prettier with the straight hair though.

My issue with Jake is since he's known from day one that she wasn't into him, he should stop putting her on the spot and trying to make her feel uncomfortable.  I know he's butt hurt and all but he should just chill and enjoy being alone, or when she goes out he should go out with his friends--that is, if he has any.

[AnnMarie17]

Clara runs her mouth...about *every* thing, to *every* body, *every* chance she gets.  Whatever is going on with Ryan, be it his sexuality, lack of experience, lack of interest, chronic constipation...whatever the hell it is, he will never tell her because he told her at the jump that he values privacy (I know...I know...dude signed up for a TV show) and she has since then shown that she has zero respect for that value.  They could, theoretically, do their business and then confirm for the "experts" that they have consummated their marriage and are compatible in that area...but he knows she can't be discreet...at all. 

I don't think he'll ever tell her what's truly in his head because he knows the town crier will be spilling that tea *every* where!

[Ilovepie]

55 minutes ago, seacliffsal said:

I wish all three "experts" had been in the room and laid into Chris.  THAT would have been classic.

As cathartic as I imagine that would feel, I doubt it would work - he would just pick up his phone and ignore them or get up and leave,  spouting off about being disrespected. Which reminds me, for someone who is all about being respected, he shows little regard for being respectFUL of others, including their time. I could not believe he just waltzed in FORTY FIVE MINUTES LATE to his meeting with PC as if all these people are just at his beck and call...

[Ilovepie]

2 hours ago, Spectator said:

Although Brianna and Vincent seem to be, by far, the most stable couple at the moment (the bar is mighty low though!), I still see huge red flags. This is probably an unpopular opinion but I fear Vincent is a poser. I think he wants to present an image that he’s a real go-getter and that he’s the best...the best provider, the best dancer, the most suave romantic, the most entrepreneurial...but in fact he’s riddled with insecurities and and fears of inadequacy and is deathly afraid that his true self will be revealed. 

I was having flash backs to Brett and Olivia during the finances conversation between Vinnie and Briana. There are some similarities there - she makes more than him and likes to spend more just like Olivia. The difference though is that Brett was totally cool with earning less and happy with his current lifestyle, but Vinnie seems threatened by it and has big dreams of being a provider. The other big difference is that Brett and Olivia had nothing but disdain for each other but Vin & Bri seem invested in their relationship, so hopefully they will come to some kind of compromise that both can live with. And where exactly are they going on the regular that costs $200 for one date? Vinnie must be poppin a lot of bottles of champagne! 😜

[DrewPaul2010]

15 minutes ago, Ilovepie said:

I wish all three "experts" had been in the room and laid into Chris.  THAT would have been classic.

Hell with that, the whole production and staff with pitch forks, torches and waterboarding equipment. 

[princelina]

56 minutes ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

This is where the 8 week artificial horizon can hurt a potentially great marriage. They should look at it as a renewal of their vows and commitments unless the union is truly bad like in Paige's case.

Eric should be patient and love the bad habits out of her. If he puts his stake in the ground and says I'm here for the long haul Virginia, I take you as is where is, I would wage in a year or two she'll lose interest in hanging with the boys. She'll start seeing friends raising families. Woman in general mature faster than guys. If he can show this love and commitment and ride it out for a while he will have the wife of his dreams. She will spoil him like she spoils Rocky.

That's where it all depends on if she is a young party girl or indeed an alcoholic.  "Loving that away" does not work.  As for the 8 week artificial horizon - only the "experts" seem to think that the end of the "experiment" is make-or-break time - as we've seen with the couples who have stayed together on decision day and then gotten A DIVORCE sometime later.  For this season I would think Vinnie and Brianna should stay together, and if I were Clara I'd give it a go to see how Ryan is without cameras.  I don't know what Ryan really thinks so it's hard to predict him.  Jacob and Haley are obviously done and don't need the extra time.  Which leaves Eric and Virginia - if I were in their shoes I think I'd stay married to see how the other is like off camera - maybe being filmed makes her more anxious or him more bossy.  If I were her I would not like a "controlling" husband; on the other hand I have sympathy with him for what he wants to control 😄   But sitting around alone on weekends with a bunch of animals ( who it's been made clear are HERS, not theirs), wondering when his wife will bother to roll in, while promising to be there for the long haul whether she ever wants kids or not, isn't much of a life.  For a year or two?  Don't see that happening, and I don't blame him. 

[StatisticalOutlier]

7 hours ago, Racj82 said:

It's actually funny that a guy not wanting to sleep with someone he's known for weeks means this and that about his sexuality. He could just...not want to rush into that. 

I would agree, except he rushed into letting Clara give him hand jobs, or whatever it is she's doing to "get him off" every night.  I'm not concluding that it has anything to do with his sexuality, but I do find it rude to accept that while withholding what she wants sexually.  If she's going to be sexually frustrated because of his time line, then he should take one for the team, too.

 

13 hours ago, qtpye said:

That being said, it is utterly stupid to pair up women who might not want children with men who definitely do. Virginia desires many more years of partying and Eric wants a baby, yesterday.

And there are tons of women who also want a baby, yesterday, especially Erik's age or older.  There's zero reason to match him with a party girl in her 20s instead.

 

3 hours ago, Devvie said:

I really hope Erik and V go their separate ways.  She is - probably - genetically predisposed to alcoholism. I now remember her dad bringing a flask to her wedding and giving her a long swig. 

I think that was Haley's dad.  She was super nervous (maybe even asking herself if she can go through with it) as they were staging for the walk down the aisle.

 

3 hours ago, Devvie said:

Don't think V and B's budget is out of line because they are just - at this point - looking at all their expenses.  Sharing housing will cut those down.  She is a professional engineer. Might have school loans. 

The budget said $200/month in school loans.  And the budget said $1,700/month for rent/mortgage--I'm not sure what that represents, but I doubt it can be cut.

 

3 hours ago, Boo Boo said:

Maybe she just doesn't want kids and there's nothing wrong with that. I don't fault anyone who doesn't want kids.  I also think society puts undue pressure on women to have children because the "end result of having a baby is worth it."  It isn't worth it for everyone .  If her family was fucked up, that's certainly a good reason.  If she doesn't want to have a kid b/c she'd have to stop drinking, also a good reason. 

I'm not doubting your sincerity, but I noticed that you started with having no problem with someone who just doesn't want kids, but then cited situations that would be acceptable reasons not to want kids.  Sometimes people just don't want them, despite happy chlidhoods and being physically up to the task of bearing them.

57 minutes ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

Its a shame that being a mother with children is almost looked down upon.

Not wanting to be a mother is definitely looked down upon.

57 minutes ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

What she doesn't know is the joy a child brings. Couples in surveys consistently say the best years of their lives was during the child raising years. Its the busiest years of your life so typically you have no time to dote on your own woes. This probably explains why divorces occur when the children leave. 

Or maybe raising the children creates its own set of woes that cause permanent damage to the marriage, but the parents hang on until after the kids are gone. 

[Devvie]

5 hours ago, qtpye said:

Eric, you hate the way she is with her dog, know she wants to be partying every weekend, and that passing out drunk on couches is a fairly common thing for her. What about this makes you say, "Wow, she will be a great mom and we should have kids immediately"?

2 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

I was most disappointed by the "experts" when Pastor Cal did not address Virginia's pregnancy concerns, but even more by the fact that he did not address her drinking issues along with spending the night at the houses of her male friends.  Dr. Pepper put it on Eric to address lessening the drinking, but really, I think it's the role of the "professional" counselors/experts. 

Exactly.  I had a friend who (at 8 yrs old) had to make her mom a Screwdriver every morning.  That's the kind of mom V might be. You're so RIGHT.  PC should have addressed it!  Certainly he knows!

3 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

Fuck Chris. The rage I felt listening him of all people saying Paige has an ugly face!!!! I'm getting mad right now typing this. I said it before and I'll say it again - what a garbage human being.

 

1 hour ago, Ilovepie said:

I could not believe he just waltzed in FORTY FIVE MINUTES LATE to his meeting with PC as if all these people are just at his beck and call...

I feel your rage. Rather than give him audience, I wish they would ban him. When they talk to him, it's like they are trying to explain colors to a blind man. 

1 hour ago, AnnMarie17 said:

Clara runs her mouth...about *every* thing, to *every* body, *every* chance she gets.  Whatever is going on with Ryan, be it his sexuality, lack of experience, lack of interest, chronic constipation...whatever the hell it is, he will never tell her because he told her at the jump that he values privacy (I know...I know...dude signed up for a TV show) and she has since then shown that she has zero respect for that value.  

I don't think he'll ever tell her what's truly in his head because he knows the town crier will be spilling that tea *every* where!

Brilliant. 

[Hip-to-be-Square]

Ryan reminds me of Zach, Luke, and Nick from previous seasons: not ever really attracted to their partners and trying to save face on camera.  The problem with faking attraction to stay in the experiment is that resentment builds and the façade eventually crumbles before decision day in a really nasty fight.  I look at all of these couples and I think that they are so desperate to be married that they are overlooking critical red flags in compatibility and projecting feelings onto their spouse that normally wouldn't be as strong or there at all in regular dating circumstances.  This isn't and shouldn't be the last chance at love for any of these people.  

[pdlinda]

19 hours ago, Racj82 said:

But, I do think Chris has this vision of a trophy wife and Paige is not that. He wants a woman that looks more like a Kardashian than a woman that looks like Paige. 

So, then, I guess the next question would be:  What would any woman who looks like a Kardashian want WITH HIM????

[Racj82]

18 minutes ago, pdlinda said:

So, then, I guess the next question would be:  What would any woman who looks like a Kardashian want WITH HIM????

To him he's king ding a ling. Any woman would want him. He's the catch of all catches.

The reality is the opposite but you can't tell him that.

[bichonblitz]

One weekend a month? To spend with your spouse? And you have to practically beg for that? GTFO of here, Gin. 

[Auntie Anxiety]

23 hours ago, karenbrady said:

I believe (from episode 1) that Ryan is struggling with his sexuality. Reminds me of 'Band of Gold' by Freda Payne.

I wondered where he would score on the Kinsey Scale since episode 1.

[Hangin Out]

8 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

VA is young but has some baggage. Her 20s are a good time to deal with it. She has time, a supportive sister, & a large friend group. Makes no sense why she did this show at this point in her life.

She got Rocky because she was depressed & he's been a comfort. Yes, she's neglected training, but he's not a bad dog. He seems cute, sweet, playful & friendly.

Then this condescending wanna be father-figure dude comes along, with zero training skills (as displayed), & outwardly annoyed by the creature who has been a comfort to her. She's taking it personally, as would I with how it was presented. Training could be a fun thing, & bonding for all. But it won't be if Erik continues with the wrong attitude.

Erik also says his dog has had training, but he had no idea what he was doing with Rocky & I felt, was kind of hateful towards him. That won't ever work. It's rubbing off on VA, because then she tried to get Rocky to "Lie down!", which again isn't going to work. I feel like the dog will end up confused, & hopefully not become aggressive due to the strain in the home & attitudes towards him; they could fuck up a good dog. Are they both too proud to spend a few minutes a day on YT looking up positive trainers - I can think of 3 off the top of my head. It would benefit them all.

And where is Erik's dog in all this, because Erik "trained" him so he should be there, acting perfect at all times. Or maybe he's concerned Rocky will be a bad influence (that actually can happen).

VA mentioned in a past episode being upset because she hardly sees her cats anymore. I've read elsewhere Erik is allergic to cats. Again, I was completely disgusted by this show & their 'experts'. W. T. F.!  So he's allergic now she's required to give up her beloved cats? Not to devalue humans, but, these lovely creatures have been an ongoing comfort to her. He's come in out of nowhere & seemingly just caused her more stress.

But I'm not going to say she's right in just wanting to party either. And he has a point in that being a pilot when he's home he just wants to be with his wife. But his delivery is not just bad, it's quite damaging.

Virginia’s dog is her baby, and Erik is screwing up the dog.  BTW, where is Eriks dog when he is away all those days when he’s flying?  She shouldn’t do anything with her dog as they will soon be divorced.  Bring the cats home and let him take an allergy pill.  Does Erik just sneeze when with cats or do they affect his breathing?  There’s a difference.  I think she will pick Rocky and the cats instead of him as he’s too controlling.

[humbleopinion]

26 minutes ago, Silver Bells said:

BTW, where is Eriks dog when he is away all those days when he’s flying?  

My neighbor is a pilot and has a dog sitter come to the house, to feed, water, walk the dog, play, bring in the mail, trash cans, packages whatever on the days he is out of town.

Edited April 9, 2021 by humbleopinion

[Empress1]

Virginia's sister's face said "Yikes" when Virginia was talking.

Re: Briana's and Vincent's expenses: I paused it and looked closely. Rent/mortgage was $1700, car note was $870, gas was $160 (which seems low to me for two cars), groceries was $500, Cookie the dog was $90, personal maintenance was $405, $350 for entertainment, insurance $315, student loans $200, phones $215, credit cards $300, travel $500, clothing $357.50 (which is a weirdly specific number), and savings was $3000. I think there was an internet number in there but I missed it. At the top of the screen it said $109,530 and $89,130, which I assume are their annual incomes? 

This actually doesn't seem that crazy to me - it's really $6K a month on day to day life for two people, and if they're bringing in $200K a year, they're in great shape. I would shuffle some things around: pay off the credit cards if they have a balance - if they can save three grand a month, there's no reason for them to carry a balance. If Briana's student loan payment is only $200 a month, her burden is probably pretty low and I might knock that out. They also probably aren't spending $500 every single month on travel (especially during the ongoing pandemic); they might be setting that aside for bigger, less frequent vacations. I would also err on the side of saving more since Vincent's income is going to ebb and flow and they will likely need to tap into a rainy day fund at some point - if those numbers at the top of the screen were their incomes, I'm surprised that Vincent's is so high since the first year(s) of a new business are often lean and he's only a few months into his.

(I knew Briana wasn't going to go from $400 a month on clothes to $150. When she was saying it I was like "girl, don't lie" and then she bumped it up to $250.)

I don't understand how you rank your marriage 10/10 when yesterday you were ranting about not getting laid. Clara really needs to stop getting Ryan off. I don't fault Ryan for not wanting intercourse right now, but I do fault him for not reciprocating - that's just selfish. Also, he went years without sex in relationships? If nothing else, their libidos are probably mismatched. I appreciated Pastor Cal asking Clara "what if this is it?" because if he's gone years without sex in previous relationships, it's a reasonable question.

I am not qualified to say whether or not Virginia is an alcoholic, but she has a relationship with alcohol that I would not be comfortable with - it would be enough for me to end things. The fact that she shut down right away when Erik suggested drinking less is a sign.

3 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

One weekend a month? To spend with your spouse? And you have to practically beg for that? GTFO of here, Gin. 

That's nuts. That's like when what's-her-name in Charlotte was telling her husband to be home from the club, to which he was going without her and leaving her home crying, by 2:30 AM. Why are you negotiating your husband going out without you all the time? I don't like Erik at all but he's right that it's him Virginia should be canceling plans for, not the other way around. Also, in the beginning of a new relationship, you usually spend a lot of time with the person because you're into them - if she's already like "meh, I'll see you when I see you," that's not a good sign.

It is so ridiculous to me that kids/no kids and how the kids will be raised isn't taken into consideration. Nobody is wrong for wanting kids or not wanting kids, but they shouldn't pair people who want kids with people who don't. They absolutely could have found Erik someone who wants kids within two years of marrying. You don't want to talk your spouse into having kids.

Drag him, Dr. Pepper! Her calling Chris a narcissist cracked me up.

[qtpye]

17 minutes ago, Spectator said:

Although Brianna and Vincent seem to be, by far, the most stable couple at the moment (the bar is mighty low though!), I still see huge red flags. This is probably an unpopular opinion but I fear Vincent is a poser. I think he wants to present an image that he’s a real go-getter and that he’s the best...the best provider, the best dancer, the most suave romantic, the most entrepreneurial...but in fact he’s riddled with insecurities and and fears of inadequacy and is deathly afraid that his true self will be revealed. 
 

I think money, ambition, career, etc. are going to be real issues for these two. Vincent wants to be the big man and be the provider in the family, which is admirable, but his current income doesn’t enable him to fulfill that role. I think he is one of those guys who is a bit lost, career-wise. Sure, he “started a new business” a couple months before he got married, and it may end up being a total home run (I know nothing about the demand for a “car locator”, or whatever he is, but it sounds like a big lift) but I’ve also seen lots of guys hide behind the idea of launching a business when they find themselves to be out of options in their respective careers. It’s an ego thing. They can’t tolerate being perceived as lazy or unemployed or between careers or in a dead end job, so they manufacture what appears to be an admirable, entrepreneurial path that ultimately just ends up being smoke and mirrors. Could it work out? Sure. But is he deathly afraid that it won’t and Brianna will perceive him as a direction-less failure? Absolutely. And watching his wife create her list of monthly expenses seemed to send him into panic mode...how can he ever boast about being the provider when his wife is racking up over $100k a year in expenses that he knows he can’t cover? So his immediate, defensive response was to boast that he’d already lived that big life with the fancy cars (although I’m pretty sure he admitted that a prior GF left him because he didn’t make enough money, so I’m not convinced that he’s ever really lived that large of a lifestyle...again, the words of a poser). He said instead he wanted to live a scaled back life with his wife. A lifestyle where he knew he wouldn’t have to bust his hump day and night just to keep up. It’s not a bad thing, but I think it’s quite different from Brianna, who seems really driven and goes after what she wants full speed. I don’t get the impression that Vincent is cut out for the 24/7 level of commitment that is typically required of an entrepreneur. Just as an example, I don’t know a single successful entrepreneur who likes to sleep late...it’s not in their DNA. And typical entrepreneurs need thick skin because they will almost surely get knocked down again and again on their whole way up and they have to get back up even stronger than before, but Vincent doesn’t seem to be able to handle being knocked down even the tiniest bit (the dancing, the champagne bottle, etc.). I think it’s a show and occasionally he lets his insecurities about his house of cards show. Bottom line: I don’t think Vincent is the guy he is presenting himself to be to Brianna. I am so hopeful they make it, but I’m afraid that when the cameras stop rolling and real life begins, Brianna might not be as wowed by Vincent as she is so far. It’s very hard for a driven go-getter to partner with anyone other than the same (thus her insistence that he wake up early...that’s in her DNA, not his).

 

I do wish them the best though and I really hope I’m wrong!

 

We were just talking about how many guys on apps often use entrepreneur as a replacement for unemployed. There are many women online who love Vinnie and claim that he is worth $800k with his business. First, how the heck would a bunch of strangers on the internet know that and second, his business is fairly new, so how could it be worth that much? Does he have an inventory of cars and if so, why have we not seen anything of his business? Heck, Eric could be a potential client.

That being said many people who are entrepreneurs go on to do amazing things in our society...I am not trying to knock anyone who has the gumption to go into business for themselves. 

On the other hand, Chris is definitely a poser who uses being an entrepreneur to hide a lot of shady stuff or the fact that he is broke.

39 minutes ago, Racj82 said:

To him he's king ding a ling. Any woman would want him. He's the catch of all catches.

The reality is the opposite but you can't tell him that.

He would be shocked to learn that most people probably think that he is on the same level of attractiveness with Paige. In fact, I think he is the one with the homely face, not Paige...at least she can look sweet.

 

[Empress1]

2 minutes ago, qtpye said:

He would be shocked to learn that most people probably think that he is on the same level of attractiveness with Paige. In fact, I think he is the one with the homely face, not Paige...at least she can look sweet.

I think Paige is pretty, except when she makes certain wig choices (y'all know what I mean; I hope she threw that one out after seeing it on TV). I don't like her faux locs either, but I don't like faux locs in general. Chris is not cute to begin with and then he opens his mouth and it all goes to shit.

[Crashcourse]

I almost choked on my cheesecake when Chris said he didn't like Paige's face while sitting there looking like somebody sat on his face and took a dump.   

[LennieBriscoe]

7 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

Same! Some people are night owls and some are early birds. If it doesn't affect his job then he can keep a different bed time than her! I loathe getting up at the crack of dawn when I don't have to get kids off to school or go to work!

Then there are us old insomniac birds! Sleep, schmeep! 👀

[buttersister]

Quote

And finally, how hard is it AT THE BARE MINIMUM to match people who are on the same page in terms of kids??? It's the EASIEST thing to do and yet they fucked it up MULTIPLE TIMES just this season alone. Great job "experts"!

Those experts suck. But no mismatches=no drama=no MAFS. Their talent lies in keeping a straight face on camera. And not quite calling out bs. Pepper calling Chris a narcissist is no-shit, Sherlock and she left out sociopath.

I loathe Eric and wouldn’t put up with the controlling attempt for one minute. But he’s not wrong about Virginia’s husband vs friends time ratio. Why is she here? Unless she was looking for a party boy husband? Hey, experts!

[LennieBriscoe]

2 hours ago, Hip-to-be-Square said:

Ryan reminds me of Zach, Luke, and Nick from previous seasons: not ever really attracted to their partners and trying to save face on camera.  The problem with faking attraction to stay in the experiment is that resentment builds and the façade eventually crumbles before decision day in a really nasty fight.  I look at all of these couples and I think that they are so desperate to be married that they are overlooking critical red flags in compatibility and projecting feelings onto their spouse that normally wouldn't be as strong or there at all in regular dating circumstances.  This isn't and shouldn't be the last chance at love for any of these people.  

Erik and Jake seem to think this is Last Chance Saloon, though. 

[DrewPaul2010]

9 hours ago, Madding crowd said:

If Ryan wanted a religious virgin he could find one on a Christian dating site. If he wants a marriage without sex, he should have gone on the unmatchable show because it will be very difficult to find a wife that doesn’t want sex.
 

I must have just got lucky then (sad face)

Just now, LennieBriscoe said:

Erik and Jake seem to think this is Last Chance Saloon, though. 

Not sure about Erik but Jake will be inundated with offers to date.

[DrewPaul2010]

38 minutes ago, Crashcourse said:

I almost choked on my cheesecake when Chris said he didn't like Paige's face while sitting there looking like somebody sat on his face and took a dump.   

He has pout face down to a science. What a conniver.

[StatisticalOutlier]

46 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

Re: Briana's and Vincent's expenses: I paused it and looked closely.

I had done the same thing, and posted some of the numbers upthread, when people were wondering whether it was rent/mortgage for one house or two.

46 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

I think there was an internet number in there but I missed it.

Internet was $80, and there was also electricity, which is $85.  (Those numbers also seem like they're for only one house.)

46 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

At the top of the screen it said $109,530 and $89,130, which I assume are their annual incomes? 

I'm not so sure.  If you add the numbers you saw, plus internet and electricity, the total is $109,524, which is right at the $109,530 at the top of the screen.  So I'm thinking that's Brianna's take-home pay.  For a minute, I thought maybe the $109,530 was her gross and $89,130 her net, but that would mean she was overspending like mad.  Although...we don't know what $300 for the credit cards is.  Anything that gets put on the card would go in one of the other categories (entertainment, personal care, etc.), so is it possible that's the payment she's making for the overspending she was doing (while also saving $3,000/month)?  But that would mean the budget is based on her gross income, which can't be right. 

I find it hard to believe that Vinny's making $90,000 already, after just starting his business.  Maybe that's what he used to make wherever he worked before, and is currently making $0?  If he's bringing home $90,000, it should be reflected somewhere in the budget; if they're living on only her income, it would be an additional $7,500 in savings every month.  Otherwise, they're leaving $90,000 unaccounted for in their budget.

Sigh.  This show can't even offer clarity about numbers.