S05.E10: A Simmons by Any Other Name

[Mindthinkr]

D’Andra’s Medicine Monday leaves Brandi feeling like she betrayed her religious beliefs; Tiffany has a big meeting with her boss to reduce her work hours; Kameron lays down the law with Court about their house hunting. 

[Mindthinkr]

I can’t believe I’m the only one who watched this! 

[Keywestclubkid]

Mama Dee’s dream was to sleep her way to money? Did I understand that story correctly?

[nexxie]

8 minutes ago, Mindthinkr said:

I can’t believe I’m the only one who watched this! 

I watched, but can’t think of anything to say about Brandi that won’t get me thrown off the site.

[Keywestclubkid]

What a horrible thing to do to your child... to take such glee .. that was gross 

[nexxie]

7 minutes ago, Keywestclubkid said:

Mama Dee’s dream was to sleep her way to money? Did I understand that story correctly?

Kam called it - a stalker and gold digger. I’ll add: projecting her crap onto her daughter.

[Wicked]

Brandi can just shut. up.

[Lassus]

"It's not you, it's me"?  Are you fucking kidding me? 

I did not tune in to watch all 35 years of my 90s dating life, BRAVO.

Edited March 17, 2021 by Lassus

[Lassus]

Your kids really don't care about your talk with your boss, I promise.  Not at all.

[njbchlover]

Watching women in their late 30's to 50 years of age constantly get stupid, embarassingly falling-down drunk is not my idea of a fun show.  Just as it isn't fun  when it involves 20-somethings, as well.  I don't want to watch ladies of a certain age drunkenly grinding up against each other in a desperate attempt to look cool or fun.  It's not fun to watch immature young women, it's worse with women who are supposed to be mature just basically making fools of themselves.  

Week after week after week - same shit, different week.  It's getting old.  Get drunk, have a fight, cry some fake tears, walk away, others chase after the two who had the fight.  Make up either the same night or next day.  Lather, rinse, repeat.

The only difference tonight was D'Andra had a fight with her mother instead of one of the other housewives.  Drunk D'Andra is not attractive, and sober Mama Dee is a cold-hearted, nasty bitch.  

Drunk Kary is a hot mess - well, she's a hot mess when she's sober, too - she always looks disheveled and sloppy, imo, but when she gets drunk, she looks even worse.  Keep drinking that tequila that way, and those 50 years (plus more) are going to start showing up on your face real quick - botox and fillers won't work forever!!!  

Lastly - how the hell was that Morrocan-themed birthday party decor?  Granted, it appeared they had some Moroccan-inspired dishes and the belly dancers with the snakes was slightly Morrocan themed, but the decor?  Brightly pastel colored balloons?  Pink carpet?  I guess this was Morocco by way of Dallas.  

I think I've added another Housewives franchise to my "no longer interested" list.  I gave up on Orange County, Atlanta and lost interest in Potomac - this one is becoming a boring, embarrassing mess too!  

 

Edited March 17, 2021 by njbchlover

[Marley]

Shut the fuck Brandi no one is asking you to believe in anything else. I dislike Brandi more and more every episode. What is she trying to prove with the bs she is saying.

Altho this shaman seems like a joke lol.

I don’t know why but I kind of find Kam and Courts banter funny.

D’andra was so wasted but Mama Dee is a bitch.

[njbchlover]

10 minutes ago, Lassus said:

Your kids really don't care about your talk with your boss, I promise.  Not at all.

Yeah-they really didn't seem to care, did they?  They were more interested in their popsicles!!  Tiffany - just tell them that Mommy is now going to be able to spend more time with you.....once she stops filming the reality show that was the real reason she asked for a shorter work week as a doctor.  

Edited March 17, 2021 by njbchlover

[DallasDiva243]

Kameron with the snake was hilarious! I loved her so much this episode!!

[Jel]

Kam calling it what it was: gold digging and stalking - check

And why didn't D'Andra point out to Brandi what she said in the TH -- mediums are not exactly the done thing in conservative or evangelical (dunno what she is) Christian community.  Conjuring spirits seems way worse. I don't know, I'm not an expert on these matters.

D'Andra is going to be next in for rehab I think.  

I found this episode boring.

 

[angelamh66]

Brandi finally lost me forever with that sanctimonious religion garbage. She was teetering before but it’s over now. Ugh.

ETA: I’m really mad at Brandi making me side with De’Andra and the pseudo shaman. Because yeah... I’d be choking back laughter myself. But the dude wasn’t opening the gates of hell for cripes sake. 

Edited March 17, 2021 by angelamh66

[oakville]

52 minutes ago, Marley said:

 

Altho this shaman seems like a joke lol.

I don’t know why but I kind of find Kam and Courts banter funny.

 

I can't take the shaman/hair dresser seriously.

Kam & Courts could be a sitcom.

[Shannah Banana]

Dallas is losing me too, at this point the only one I'm being entertained by is Tiffany, and that's because she's quirky and funny to me.  I'm hoping her logical side will kick in, sooner rather than later, to not be too enticed to fit in with the rest of the alcohol abusers, and degrade to one of them.  That damn Kary will turn you into a lush, as long as you lush out with her.  I cannot stand Kary, she is the main one that's making me rethink Dallas.  My least favorite for sure.  I adore Tiffany's husband too.  I'm more interested in their relationship than any of the others.

Brandi is so irrelevant at this point, I don't care, just make her go away.  Please Jesus.  If everything so dear to her heart is based on Jesus, then she REALLY needs to get off reality TV.  She's making him look real bad.  

D'Andra and Dee (she ain't my mama) are more alike than different.  They both suck and are opportunists.  Women have been setting their sights  on men forever, using their womanly ways, and if some guy likes the goods enough, he will bite.  If they have money, all the better.  The heart wants what the heart wants, and if it is money, then it's a good chance that you will get it...one way or the other.  I'm not sure it makes very successful marriages though.

Stephanie is totally taking a back seat so far, since Brandi doesn't seem to know if she's fish or fowl.  Guess she doesn't either, since Brandi is her main squeeze. 

Kam is still okay as long as she's with her husband.  I get a kick out of their exchanges and how he hopes he is schmoozing her.  He's not sure of her depth either.  Btw, whatever happened to her pink dog food line?  I thought it was a bad idea, I wouldn't give my dog food that had food dye in it, especially red.

 

 

 

 

[CrinkleCutCat]

Kam.... the absolutely LAST person I expected to be cosying up to a snake! I’m won over now!

If Brandi had such a problem with the Shaman, who is doing the Devil’s work (puhleeeeze), why was she there and participating? 

[swankie]

So Brandi, you can chase people around with a big black dildo, assault people with the penis of your blow-up sex doll, twerk on top of a table in front of a room full of people, dry hump your friends, let your friends dry hump you, drink until you pass out drunk, conjure up spirits and jump into a river naked...but meditation is against your religion?!  Girl bye! 😒

Edited March 17, 2021 by swankie
Added a comment.

[bosawks]

3 hours ago, Keywestclubkid said:

Mama Dee’s dream was to sleep her way to money? Did I understand that story correctly?

How am I ever to believe in love again after that... 

Edited March 17, 2021 by bosawks

[swankie]

4 hours ago, Marley said:

D’andra was so wasted but Mama Dee is a bitch.

Mama Dee makes Mama Joyce from RHOA look like a Sunday school teacher when it comes to the bitch factor.  It's no wonder D'andra is the hot mess that she is.  It's almost like Mama Dee is determined to embarrass her daughter at every turn.  Is that her sick idea of tough love?  I'm baffled.  

And what's up with Brandi and her holier than thou bullcrap?  I can't stand Sunday morning Christians who sin like the devil the rest of the week but have the nerve to tell other Christians that they aren't Christianing correctly.  Again, girl bye! 😒

Edited March 17, 2021 by swankie
Added a comment.

[RealHousewife]

1 hour ago, swankie said:

So Brandi, you can chase people around with a big black dildo, assault people with the penis of your blow-up sex doll, twerk on top of a table in front of a room full of people, dry hump your friends, let your friends dry hump you, drink until you pass out drunk, conjure up spirits and jump into a river naked...but meditation is against your religion?!  Girl bye! 😒

LOL 

Honestly though, Brandi's behavior is off in general this season. It seemed like she was genuinely struggling and not herself. I wonder if that's why her behavior is so bizarre towards both Tiffany and D'Andra. 

I think it's really interesting D'Andra has studied so many religions. Really respect that. I do wish she'd stop drinking. I can see both Brandi and her mother hurting her feelings, but if she hadn't been drinking, she wouldn't have reacted the way she did. 

[Hiyo]

Quote

Mama Dee’s dream was to sleep her way to money?

No shame in her game. Get those coins however you can, Mama Dee!

Quote

I think it's really interesting D'Andra has studied so many religions. Really respect that. I do wish she'd stop drinking.

Also, better therapy for dealing with Mama Dee's bullshit.

[nexxie]

I get Tiffany wanting a group of girlfriends to fit in with, but this drunk and mostly stupid group ain’t the one.

btw, do people trust anesthesiologists they’ve seen drunkenly grinding at a party? Tiffany’s sweet husband might want to have a word with her about her professional reputation.

Edited March 17, 2021 by nexxie

[bosawks]

5 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

I think it's really interesting D'Andra has studied so many religions. Really respect that. 

I think she's really trying to find inner contentment or the one that will finally smite her mother and rid the world of evil.

I can go either way.

[Hiyo]

Quote

the one that will finally smite her mother and rid the world of evil.

Assuming any religion has enough celestial power for that.

Edited March 17, 2021 by Hiyo

[Keywestclubkid]

7 hours ago, bosawks said:

How am I ever to believe in love again after that... 

 

5 hours ago, Hiyo said:

No shame in her game. Get those coins however you can, Mama Dee!

I am just saying that was her Dream? like reach a little higher then stalking and marring a man for his money so you can be rich ... Look what that turns you into a shew of a mother who belittles and competes with your child at every turn ... she might have made her life better but she sure has hell is taking it out on her children

[Hiyo]

Yes but remember, it's much more comfortable to be miserable in a new Mercedes S-class than in a used Toyota Camry.

Edited March 17, 2021 by Hiyo

[TV Diva Queen]

Maybe Brandi's low key'd ness has to do with a video going around social media that her hubby is cheating on her and is on tape kissing someone.  So possibly she doesn't want to draw attention to herself?  

Mama D is a ruthless bitch.  I used to find her cute in her own way - but she's a monster.

That decor for the party......I never imagined Morocco to look like that.  ever.  

[Baltimore Betty]

8 hours ago, swankie said:

And what's up with Brandi and her holier than thou bullcrap?  I can't stand Sunday morning Christians who sin like the devil the rest of the week but have the nerve to tell other Christians that they aren't Christianing correctly.  Again, girl bye! 😒

I understand that the Shaman with the Extra Long Hair was not her thing, she could have opted out and not gone.  I thought judging someone was not a Christian value?  If Brandi was to judge D'Andra she should have judged her on her horrible party outfit, that was one of the worst outfits I have seen her wear.

I am stumped as to why D'Andra would ever agree to film with her mother ever, it never goes well for her.  Also, laughed hard at Mama D calling the Shaman a Sharman.

Having never been to Morocco (except at Epcot and seeing it on 90 Day Fiance with Nicole and Azan), I would doubt that big balloons and a pink rug and a garden swing would have been my first stab at recreating it in a back yard.  Did those party planners even Google Morocco? 

1 hour ago, nexxie said:

I get Tiffany wanting a group of girlfriends to fit in with, but this drunk and mostly stupid group ain’t the one.

btw, do people trust anesthesiologists they’ve seen drunkenly grinding at a party? Tiffany’s sweet husband might want to have a word with her about her professional reputation.

Maybe Tiffany is aligning herself just in case she were to get fired she could use the excuse of wanting to work less is why they sacked her instead of her drunken foolishness on camera...just a thought.

[TexasGal]

7 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

I understand that the Shaman with the Extra Long Hair was not her thing, she could have opted out and not gone.  I thought judging someone was not a Christian value?  If Brandi was to judge D'Andra she should have judged her on her horrible party outfit, that was one of the worst outfits I have seen her wear.

 

Plus, at the same party she mentions how at her "retreat" there was a meditation that made her orgasm.  So it's just the shaman aspect, not meditation in general?  She doesn't make any sense with this.

[Keywestclubkid]

12 minutes ago, TexasGal said:

Plus, at the same party she mentions how at her "retreat" there was a meditation that made her orgasm.  So it's just the shaman aspect, not meditation in general?  She doesn't make any sense with this.

I used to be #TeamBrandi but this season and these last couple of episodes I just cant anymore .. its like last year and Erika in BH ... IF Brandi goes I will not feel bad at all

[nosedive]

I'm suspicious that the D'Andra/Momma Dee confrontation was a set-up for camera.  Jen (Is that her name?  Who is she?) asks D'Andra why she goes by the name Simmons (rather than by the name of her biological father).  Instead of answering the question, D'Andra deflects it to Momma Dee, who then makes the nasty response. Why bring Momma Dee into it?  Why not just answer the question the way you want it answered?  Smells a little fishy to me.  

Hey, Brandi, how about you and your self-righteousness come down off your high horse.  "Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place..." (Eph. 5:4)  I guess you ditched that day of Sunday School.  

Is Stephanie still on this show?  

 

[Jel]

7 hours ago, Hiyo said:

No shame in her game. Get those coins however you can, Mama Dee!

Also, better therapy for dealing with Mama Dee's bullshit.

I think some people feel there’s shame in that game. I don’t have a daughter, but if I did I would encourage her to get a good education so she can make her own money, and marry someone who is a good person, treats her well, going to be a good life partner, etc. Money does not have much to do with it. 
 

Maybe I’m at yet another table for one, but to me, the idea of marrying for money is a little sad.

[Hiyo]

I never said it was the only way or the correct way. I’m just not judging people who do that.

[TV Diva Queen]

11 minutes ago, Jel said:

I think some people feel there’s shame in that game. I don’t have a daughter, but if I did I would encourage her to get a good education so she can make her own money, and marry someone who is a good person, treats her well, going to be a good life partner, etc. Money does not have much to do with it. 
 

Maybe I’m at yet another table for one, but to me, the idea of marrying for money is a little sad.

I'm at a table for one on the This is Us thread....maybe we can skooch our tables together.  🙂

and I totally agree with your post.  

[Jel]

7 minutes ago, Hiyo said:

I never said it was the only way or the correct way. I’m just not judging people who do that.

True, you didn't say that. :)  I don't judge it in a "to condemn" way, like I'm not going to write off someone who made that choice, but I also don't approve of it as a primary reason for marrying someone. I don't even think it's a good reason to marry someone. In Dee's day there were less opportunities for women, so perhaps it made more sense then, but today? Seems anachronistic.  And shallow. That third Hermes bag is not really going to make you happy.

Someone did a study a few years ago about whether money buys happiness, and it turns out it does, to a point. I think that point was about $78,000 pp, per year. Adjusting for inflation, say $100k now. Enough to pay your bills, enjoy a few nights out, afford a vacation, etc. Up until that point, it buys happiness, after that, not so much. (Then you get a different set of problems, like worrying about capital gains tax increases and judgy internet posters  ;)

17 minutes ago, TV Diva Queen said:

I'm at a table for one on the This is Us thread....maybe we can skooch our tables together.  🙂

and I totally agree with your post.  

*screeching table legs dragging on floor sound*

Hey TV Diva Queen! I'm thinking about ordering some apps. ;)

[hisbunkie]

13 hours ago, Lassus said:

It's not you, it's me"?  Are you fucking kidding me? 

I did not tune in to watch 35 years of my 90s dating life, BRAVO.

Except that this is totally correct in this situation and not some boyman’s dribble.  To me, Brandi appears to be in a mental health crisis. Not sure what the aftermath of the release of her  Instagram video was (the cruelty of people can be shocking) but she certainly sounds like someone experiencing PTSD- actually, actually may not be in the P stage yet. I’m relieved that she is moving on.  

Kari seems to have a very unhealthy relationship with alcohol, it’s painful to watch. Every time she mentions not being parented by her alcoholic mother I cringe. No insight.   And I have been to Morocco, that’s not it!

Tiffany’s voice pattern hurts my ears.

I really like Kam’s husband ,what a terrific Girl Dad he turned out to be! And he doesn’t just preach it, he’s supporting his daughter.  I’m thinking that young girl will be taking over the family business.

[Hiyo]

I think money buys security more than it buys happiness.

 

[Jel]

2 minutes ago, Hiyo said:

I think money buys security more than it buys happiness.

 

That is true, and the security part is most of the $78 K per year thing. But once that's taken care of, the other stuff turns out to be surprisingly unrelated to actual, measurable happiness.

[Hiyo]

Security isn’t just for the here and now. It also means for the future, where you don’t have to keep living pay check to pay check while in your late 60s or older, something which is becoming more and more the norm these days.

But I feel we are getting off topic and should go back to snarking on the HWs...

Edited March 17, 2021 by Hiyo

[bichonblitz]

2 hours ago, TV Diva Queen said:

That decor for the party......I never imagined Morocco to look like that.  ever.  

Whose backyard was that? With the small patch of yard, no beautiful landscaping and the beat up fence. Yeah, Kary went all out for Tiffany. Cheap, cheap, cheap! Where was the lake and/or pool? Luck for Tiff there was no body of water around them to jump in to.  

Mama Dee is vile. She married for money. Same as D'Andra's husband. He married for money. Her money. 

[TV Diva Queen]

15 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

Whose backyard was that? With the small patch of yard, no beautiful landscaping and the beat up fence. Yeah, Kary went all out for Tiffany. Cheap, cheap, cheap! Where was the lake and/or pool? Luck for Tiff there was no body of water around them to jump in to.  

Mama Dee is vile. She married for money. Same as D'Andra's husband. He married for money. Her money. 

it was the event space backyard.  like they all don't have yards pretty enough to host a party.  This event space to me is like for someone who lives in a condo or apartment and doesn't have a yard but wants an outdoor party.  there's a space by me where you rent the indoor and outdoor patio, bring in your own food, you have to buy their booze and you decorate it.  Great for city apartment dwellers.  🙂

[sugarbaker design]

1 hour ago, bichonblitz said:

Whose backyard was that? With the small patch of yard, no beautiful landscaping and the beat up fence. Yeah, Kary went all out for Tiffany. Cheap, cheap, cheap! Where was the lake and/or pool? Luck for Tiff there was no body of water around them to jump in to.  

Mama Dee is vile. She married for money. Same as D'Andra's husband. He married for money. Her money. 

He married D'Andra for Mama Dee's money!  If D'Andra had money Mama Dee wouldn't be coming over with checks!  D'Andra's okay with cameras catching that, but not ok with her taking her rich step-daddy's last name, go figure!

[bichonblitz]

1 minute ago, sugarbaker design said:

He married D'Andra for Mama Dee's money! 

That's exactly what I meant.  For sure,  "Her money" being Mama Dee's money.🙃

[Keywestclubkid]

16 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

That's exactly what I meant.  For sure,  "Her money" being Mama Dee's money.🙃

Technically wouldn't that be her dead husbands money?

[Rahul]

Brandi is the worst kind of Christian--sanctimonious and judgmental without understanding the core tenants of her own religion. I'm pretty sure Jesus would not approve of Brandi's behavior.

It really irks me when Eastern or "pagan" spiritual beliefs are seen as less than by "devout" Christians. Its clear to me Brandi is the type of Southern Christian who sees her way as the only way and true path, and everyone else as a heathen on their way to hell in a hand basket. I used to find Brandi occasionally amusing in the earlier seasons but she can take her holier-than-thou self and leave this show at the season never to be seen again, as far as I'm concerned.

 

 

[bichonblitz]

14 minutes ago, Keywestclubkid said:

Technically wouldn't that be her dead husbands money?

Yup. The one she masterfully planned and studied where he would be and when he would be there and stalked him until he noticed her and fell for her womanly wiles. That dead husband. 

[Rahul]

13 hours ago, swankie said:

So Brandi, you can chase people around with a big black dildo, assault people with the penis of your blow-up sex doll, twerk on top of a table in front of a room full of people, dry hump your friends, let your friends dry hump you, drink until you pass out drunk, conjure up spirits and jump into a river naked...but meditation is against your religion?!  Girl bye! 😒

This. So much this! Also, let's not forget Brandi justifies her copious daytime drinking and generally being a lush by calling wine "Jesus Juice."

14 hours ago, Shannah Banana said:

Dallas is losing me too, at this point the only one I'm being entertained by is Tiffany, and that's because she's quirky and funny to me.  I'm hoping her logical side will kick in, sooner rather than later, to not be too enticed to fit in with the rest of the alcohol abusers, and degrade to one of them.

Tiffany has been a Godsend this season. I too find her to be highly amusing. She is basically carrying this franchise, with some support from D'Andra. Dallas needs a major retooling if it is to come back for another season because apparently the ratings are in the crapper.

11 hours ago, RealHousewife said:

I think it's really interesting D'Andra has studied so many religions. Really respect that. I do wish she'd stop drinking. 

I admire D'Andra for her spiritual quest and think it was awful of Brandi to call the guided meditation with the shaman demonic. Just because you don't understand something doesn't make it wrong. It only highlights Brandi's own ignorance and closed mindedness. 

4 hours ago, TV Diva Queen said:

Maybe Brandi's low key'd ness has to do with a video going around social media that her hubby is cheating on her and is on tape kissing someone.  So possibly she doesn't want to draw attention to herself?  

My theory is Brandi released that footage herself to deflect from the mess she has shown herself to be in recent episodes.

 

4 hours ago, TV Diva Queen said:

That decor for the party......I never imagined Morocco to look like that.  ever.  

Spoiler alert... 

Spoiler

It doesn't.

After witnessing that travesty, Party with Lushra is the last event planning service I would use if I lived in the Dallas area--I can imagine their business actually suffering as a result of their appearance and visibility on this show. I can't decide which was more hideous--the bright pink and Easter color palette or that small, sad-looking, astroturfed event space.   

15 hours ago, njbchlover said:

Watching women in their late 30's to 50 years of age constantly get stupid, embarassingly falling-down drunk is not my idea of a fun show.  Just as it isn't fun  when it involves 20-somethings, as well.  I don't want to watch ladies of a certain age drunkenly grinding up against each other in a desperate attempt to look cool or fun.  It's not fun to watch immature young women, it's worse with women who are supposed to be mature just basically making fools of themselves.  

Week after week after week - same shit, different week.  It's getting old.  Get drunk, have a fight, cry some fake tears, walk away, others chase after the two who had the fight.  Make up either the same night or next day.  Lather, rinse, repeat.

I agree. RHONY has fallen into the same trap in recent years.

Edited March 17, 2021 by Rahul

[hisbunkie]

16 hours ago, njbchlover said:

Lastly - how the hell was that Morrocan-themed birthday party decor?  Granted, it appeared they had some Moroccan-inspired dishes and the belly dancers with the snakes was slightly Morrocan themed, but the decor?  Brightly pastel colored balloons?  Pink carpet?  I guess this was Morocco by way of Dallas.  

I’d say it’s Morocco by way of Barbi.