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S16.E09: Week 9


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I wish Bennett had stayed gone so I would continue to like him. I even cut him some slack for being a dick. Now he's going to ruin that. Learn to STFU Bennett.

(Except that's on TPTB, making him come back. So bite me, TPTB people.)

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Gee.....she doesn't give a rose out....and Bennett just happens to show up?  Okay, his face on the couch was way creepy.  Ooo, nice head turn T!  Yes.....he was just saying it T!!!! Don't fall for it.  I thnk we're seeing some nipplage maybe?

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2 minutes ago, catrice2 said:

A Gang infested neighborhood?  Was this an attempt at humor? 

The way he was acting, he made it seem like it would be unsafe for her to go and meet his family. 

Edited by Lacy4u
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Well, yes, Bennett, you’re totally questioning the integrity of her decisions by not accepting that she sent him home. Damn lie detector test, so producer driven.  I don’t believe a word he says, he just can’t stand to not be top dog. 

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(edited)

Oh no, Bennett said "I love you" and he SHOWED UP for her. All he needs now is a killer (heh) sob story and he's in like Flynn.

Okay, I'll solve this. Bennett can come live with me and I'll train him for a few months.

Next week = Some good fun, I hope. Unless TPTB are pranking us, like they always do.

Edited by saber5055
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40 minutes ago, Lacy4u said:

Taysia appears to be attracted to guys she can 'save'. Ben has dozens of red flags, Zac has dozens of red flags, Brendan & Noah has some & so does Blake. She's got a horrible picker! I'm starting to not like watching the rest of this season. I was so happy (at first) when I learned that she was replacing Clare & I was ecstatic seeing the amount of handsome, financially secure & educated African American men that were finally allowed to participate on the Bachelorette! Unfortunately, she's sending them home one-by-one, so that's sad and a bummer for me. Oh well, she definitely has a type. Sulky, psycho killer that will end up having a Lifetime movie made about him once he takes a weapon to work or buries his family in oil cans. Yep, she's a fan of the wounded, hurt man that doesn't like to share his feelings, is socially awkward and has a plethora of issues that are NOT designed to attract a woman to him or make her think he's potential husband material! I'm so confused & disappointed with Taysia. Oh well, I can't wait to see this new Bachelor's season especially since I've already seen the 40+ potential participants vying for his love.

So people with mental health issues are all "psycho killers"?

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Wait. We’re seeing TMTA and all the guys she sends home BEFORE we see her send them home on the show?! Way to spoil yourselves, show. I’m blaming JoJo for this, too. Harrison would never!

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2 minutes ago, EllenB said:

So people with mental health issues are all "psycho killers"?

Your words, not mine! However the word 'psycho' does mean 'mental'. 

Edited by Lacy4u
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3 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

Wait. We’re seeing TMTA and all the guys she sends home BEFORE we see her send them home on the show?! Way to spoil yourselves, show. I’m blaming JoJo for this, too. Harrison would never!

So this is on next Monday and Tuesday ... is episode 10 Monday and MTA Tuesday? Anyone know? The MTA preview looked harsh, and therefore lots of fun, but the previews always prank us so I'm not expecting much. Looking forward to Bennett's Bukowski impression.

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I feel like I need to make a Public Service Announcement 

You DON'T have to suffer something big during a relationship for it to be a real love.  

A man doesn't have to have a horrible back story to be a real man...it's ok if they do, but it is NOT required 

True love does not mean  everything is perfect, but it also doesn't mean you have to "overcome" something at the start for it to be real. 

Most men cannot be there for you until they figure out who they are.....

 

Feel free to add to this list. 

 

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2 minutes ago, saber5055 said:

So this is on next Monday and Tuesday ... is episode 10 Monday and MTA Tuesday? Anyone know? The MTA preview looked harsh, and therefore lots of fun, but the previews always prank us so I'm not expecting much. Looking forward to Bennett's Bukowski impression.

TMTA is Monday. Crazy that they’re having that first!

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Next Monday & Tuesday is Must see TV! The Men Tell All should prove to be very interesting! Especially with so many guys not liking Noah & that one guy that disrespected Claire as he left.

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How are we supposed to snark and mock a show that needs a PSA at the end?
No fun, show.

When JoJo announced that time was up at the cocktail party it had the same delivery as a mom sending their kid to bed. “It’s time—no you cannot have 5 more minutes...”
Also, can’t she just be “Jo” and not “JoJo”?  
 

Also Bennett said “It’s been a ‘world wind’.”

Harvard? Why couldn’t HE have gotten the fake lie detector???

Edited by clubsauce
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24 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

TMTA is Monday. Crazy that they’re having that first!

Wow, so I guess we get to see them bitch out Tayshia on Monday, then Tuesday we get to see Tayshia send them home.

I guess maybe it is in the correct order ...

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And people were trashing Claire?  I think she is a genius for sparing herself this sobfest....I can see her now thinking "I  don't see a husband here, why waste my time? I can run off with a hot guy and have a few months of fun without all the drama!" 

So it is usually at HOMETOWNS when a POC starts to talk about if they have previously dated one? I saw a few episodes with Jubilee and about half of Rachel's season an I seem to recall her at least asking some people if their family would accept her.  Had to be before hometowns because I didn't make it that far.  It is not normal to me that I know about drug addiction, suicide, imprisonment and an eating disorder, but she has yet to find out if they can see themselves having interracial children, or if they think their families will REALLY be accepting. At the minimum I would want to know if I am the first POC girlfriend they will be meeting, and if not, what happened to the others? 

I keep hearing they are having "real" conversations this season....what do they usually talk about? I honestly don't know why awards are being given out for telling someone you are swapping spit with information that you should have had before you started swapping spit!  I am sorry, watching her kiss people reminds me why I generally cannot watch this show..and the idea of Fantasy Suites grosses me out. 

I will end this with "why is Blake still here, as well as why was he EVER here?" 

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3 hours ago, FlyingEgret said:

I can't believe Noah didn't take the mustache socks...

Noah posted himself wearing those (used) socks on SM so he did take them. 

He was a plant, just like bennett.

 

 

2 hours ago, tennisgurl said:

GIVE ME YOUR TRAGIC PAST DAMN IT! 

 

She has a serious fetish for them. TayTay is the biggest Red Flag of them all. 

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2 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

I think the producers already knew he'd changed his name because he told them, so the light bulb was ready.  It was a setup.

Oh, absolutely. I hate when this show is SO overtly fake. The "lie-detector test" was equivalent to maybe a 6th-grade science-fair project. One which would impress the other sixth graders. Not one of those men truly believed that was a lie-detector test, either, because they're all old enough to know that a lie-detector doesn't have colored light bulbs which turn on and off at meandering intervals. Particularly in the 21st century. They'd at least be expecting the zig-zag lines. Perhaps they couldn't see what we could see at home, which was JoJo's arm moving to switch the bulbs on and off, but they had to know it was a jury-rigged bogus contraption. The questions were clearly a setup so Tayshia could follow the script. Right, the drama of Zac being a cheater and it's his girlfriend from elementary school. Riley gulping that the test discovered his deep dark secret about changing his name. Etcetera.

I also did not appreciate Tayshia's demeanor when talking to Bennett and Noah. She can send home whomever she and/or the producers want, but that scolding tone and pursed lips attitude is not attractive. 

Ben and Zac have very serious issues in their pasts. Not insurmountable issues, but issues that demand to be seriously addressed. It seems that Zac may have addiction well behind him, but recent multiple suicide attempts is not something that should be trifled with. Only Ben knows, if he even knows, if he can handle the rejection that may be his lot. These heart-breaking near-tragedies are not just some drama to titillate or stoke Tayshia in the way that it seems they do. 

Bennett's time is up. Not a good look, coming back. Go with dignity. 

I imagine for the hometowns, the families are in Palm Springs, having been tested and quarantined. Which begs the question if that would begin when it's the final four, or are seven or eight families quarantined? Or is it all bullshit, as we see once again there are guest stars like whomever that band was. Each week I wonder if everyone who drops in for an episode has followed the protocols. 

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35 minutes ago, Arkay said:

I also did not appreciate Tayshia's demeanor when talking to Bennett and Noah. She can send home whomever she and/or the producers want, but that scolding tone and pursed lips attitude is not attractive. 

Oh, I loved that she did it. They acted like children so that's how she treated them.

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3 hours ago, CraftyHazel said:

Failed suicide attempts in 2018 and 2019, and they put him in such an emotionally charged situation?!

Yes.  My jaw dropped when he said that.  Body issues.  An eating disorder. Back issues.  And then two suicide attempts with the last one a year ago and they let him on this show?  He said he still hadn't told his sister. 

Just sheesh. 

Zac might have some similar messed up years of his life but I do get a sense that he's not adrift any longer. Maybe in six or seven years, Ben can be in that place too but I do not feel like he is now.

2 hours ago, tennisgurl said:

Oh god, not “he shows up for me” again! Anything but that!

Isn't that what Claire said?  Is that something all Bachelorettes say? (I've only watched this season and Rachel's.)  Or was this the theme of the season and once Claire left, Tayshia had to adopt it too.

2 hours ago, catrice2 said:

You DON'T have to suffer something big during a relationship for it to be a real love.

Nope.  But I'd rather have a guy have a rough past he was able to put behind him than being all alpha and douchey.  If she's going to make a mistake with one of these guys, I'd rather it be the former rather than the latter.  And honestly, I'd say the same about the kind of TV this makes.

In fact, those deeper and real conversations just highlight how stupid the shenanigans with someone like Bennett are.  It has been awkward to see Bennett just try to bully Noah.  He can't think Noah was his biggest competition?  If he did, his power of observation skills are pretty bad.  Or was Noah just an easy target? 

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2 hours ago, clubsauce said:

Also Bennett said “It’s been a ‘world wind’.”

I heard "whirled-wind," which is still wrong but not as bad as last week's "connotates." (I know there's technically no grammatical relativism - an expression is either correct or it isn't - but I find some errors more jarring than others.)

I'm genuinely worried for Ben. He said that he had planned to have a long-term career in the military, but that it didn't work out "for a number of reasons." I wonder if there were other factors in addition to the the back injury that contributed to his suicide attempts, like untreated PTSD or a pre-existing mental health condition (other than the bulimia) that were exacerbated during his service. It looks like his physical injuries have healed, but not the mental ones.

To end this post on a lighter note, what was up with Tayshia's group date outfits? Did the stylist take a personal day? The first outfit, white tank top with bra showing and short, glittery fit-and-flare skirt looked like something Paris Hilton would have worn circa 2003. The second one, a bridal-looking high-low romper-dress combo with a too-small top that was so not equipped to support Tayshia's boobs? I have no words for that level of hideousness. Bennett said she looked good, so he's a shameless liar.

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For someone who brags about his high emotional intelligence, Bennett was pretty damn oblivious to Tayshia's icy glare when he was mansplaining EQ to her. Dude does not remotely know how to read a room.

As others have said, the "lie detector" portion was insulting, even by the low standards of reality TV polygraph segments. Without a set of proper control questions (and "What is your name?" does not qualify), the test itself is useless: the whole point is to make you lie (or at least doubt your own truthfulness) during the control questions, so they can then compare the stress response to the real questions. An example of a real control question in this situation would be "Have you ever mentally pictured someone else, even for a moment, when you've had sex with a girlfriend?" Most guys have, but will answer No, creating the stress reaction. THEN, and only then, do they ask the real question of "Have you ever physically cheated on a girlfriend?" The man who hasn't will truthfully and calmly answer No, because he knows he hasn't. Since the stress reaction from the control question was higher than the stress reaction from the real question, the examiner will indicate it's a truthful answer. It's also a ridiculously easy system to break once you know about the control questions: you simply give yourself a high stress reaction (by flexing your arm, biting your tongue, hiding a tack in your shoe and stepping on it, or whatever else) during the control questions, and you'll pass every time. This is why polygraph tests haven't been allowed in courts for decades. They're easy to beat and simply not reliable. Their only value in this day and age lies in the intimidation factor of being hooked up to a machine and grilled about one's past.

(Meanwhile, Mrs. RaiderDuck also pointed out something more basic about the whole date: If you can't trust someone to be honest, why in the blue hell are you even pursuing a relationship with them?)

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Tonight's episode was CRAZY!!  I was not expecting this Bennet twist AT ALL!  Is this the first time that one of the Bachelor contestants initially considered a joke and supporting storyline material suddenly moves up to the first tier candidates -- especially so late in the season?

Anyway, this is the best Bachelorette season for me.

 

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43 minutes ago, Sir RaiderDuck OMS said:

As others have said, the "lie detector" portion was insulting, even by the low standards of reality TV polygraph segments. Without a set of proper control questions (and "What is your name?" does not qualify), the test itself is useless: the whole point is to make you lie (or at least doubt your own truthfulness) during the control questions, so they can then compare the stress response to the real questions. An example of a real control question in this situation would be "Have you ever mentally pictured someone else, even for a moment, when you've had sex with a girlfriend?" Most guys have, but will answer No, creating the stress reaction. THEN, and only then, do they ask the real question of "Have you ever physically cheated on a girlfriend?" The man who hasn't will truthfully and calmly answer No, because he knows he hasn't. Since the stress reaction from the control question was higher than the stress reaction from the real question, the examiner will indicate it's a truthful answer. It's also a ridiculously easy system to break once you know about the control questions: you simply give yourself a high stress reaction (by flexing your arm, biting your tongue, hiding a tack in your shoe and stepping on it, or whatever else) during the control questions, and you'll pass every time. This is why polygraph tests haven't been allowed in courts for decades. They're easy to beat and simply not reliable. Their only value in this day and age lies in the intimidation factor of being hooked up to a machine and grilled about one's past.

 

So true. Also, obviously, a real lie-detector test would be administered by someone highly trained in that field, and not by Bachelorette JoJo. Which is another reason why I simply do not believe the men thought it was real, and just played along with the script. 

ETA: I remember hearing sometime ago that if lie-detectors (real ones) were accurate, there'd be no need for a trial, lawyers, judge nor jury. The lie-detector would give the verdict, and poof! All over.

Edited by Arkay
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1 hour ago, Arkay said:

So true. Also, obviously, a real lie-detector test would be administered by someone highly trained in that field, and not by Bachelorette JoJo. Which is another reason why I simply do not believe the men thought it was real, and just played along with the script.

Riley didn't even play along, he said he doesn't let his clients take lie detector tests because they're known to be inaccurate. That made me respect him even more because so far he's been a good sport about all the other silly dates, but obviously drew the line when there was a conflict with his professional credibility. And since he seems to have legally changed his name, it's not a "lie" for him to use his current legal name - the question did not ask for the name on his birth certificate. TPTB obviously knew about the name change and made JoJo ask the question and light the red bulb.

Edited by chocolatine
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I will never understand why contestants come on this show and spill their deep dark secrets, knowing hundreds of thousands of people will now be privy to it?!!

Hometowns already? Talk about an accelerated season! My money is on Tayisha not ending up with whoever she picks.

I think this is a big game for Bennett. He’s not in love with her. Maybe he figured it was better than going back home to quarantine! I heard “world wind” too. WTF?

Ben is way too intense for this show. I feel bad for the guy, but he sounds like he needs lots of therapy, not a stint on this show. 

Crying about name changes and whatever else they were blubbering about? No wonder I enjoy Noah. He’s pretty easygoing and not letting this get to him. 

This show is starting to tank. I’ll be surprised if it lasts more than 1 or 2 seasons more. 

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7 hours ago, Arkay said:

I also did not appreciate Tayshia's demeanor when talking to Bennett and Noah. She can send home whomever she and/or the producers want, but that scolding tone and pursed lips attitude is not attractive. 

Yeah, she does that anytime she's displeased.  She said she wanted to get to the bottom of their issue, but then didn't seem the least bit interested in what they had to say.  Instead of defending Noah she turned it into, how dare they waste time on her show talking about something other than her?  The, "You questioned my integrity!" made me wonder if she even knew what integrity meant. "There's zero chance Tayshia will pick you,"  coming from Bennett's point of view, actually compliments Tayshia by saying she wouldn't pick him because she has good sense.  

I couldn't be with someone who didn't argue logically  or who sat back with a judgmental attitude rather than trying to understand my issue.  Big red flag guys!  

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Watching this now. Tayshia is so over Bennett. I don't think she's impressed with Noah, either. I think she will send both home, but if she chooses one, it will be Noah. I'll see in a couple of minutes what happens!

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I wonder if Tayshia is in a room close by, listening in on everything.

Noah smirks, thinking he won over Bennett. But he may be smirking too soon . . . She was right to cut Bennett. He always has to be right and have the last word. Hard to live with 24/7. Whoa, Noah's slugging down those breath mints! I knew she'd cut Noah, too. I guess I'm glad to see both of them gone. That adolescent bickering was tiring.

But now I'm confused. Did she cut him or did she just not give him a rose but he'll still be there for the rose ceremony?

Is anyone looking for love? Chris H says to apply!!

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I think they shouldn't let people come back after they are turned away.  I just think it never amounts to anything, is a waste of everyone's time, and to end this episode on that "cliffhanger" was just dumb.  The last episode ended so similarly.  We don't care.  Show, we really don't care enough about the one random person that we know won't make it to the end anyway.

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I forgot Jojo is pseudo-Chris H! She comes walking in and I think, what's she doing here?

I'm trying to imagine what this show would be like if Jeff Probst was host. After the rose ceremony he tells the reject guys, "Sorry, guys, out to the limos! Got nothing for you!"

Ugh, she kept Noah! Not that I'm so against him, but I think there are better guys than him that she rejected (but I'm OK with Ed going, we'll see him on Paradise).

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1 hour ago, JudyObscure said:

Yeah, she does that anytime she's displeased.  She said she wanted to get to the bottom of their issue, but then didn't seem the least bit interested in what they had to say.  Instead of defending Noah she turned it into, how dare they waste time on her show talking about something other than her?  The, "You questioned my integrity!" made me wonder if she even knew what integrity meant. "There's zero chance Tayshia will pick you,"  coming from Bennett's point of view, actually compliments Tayshia by saying she wouldn't pick him because she has good sense.  

I couldn't be with someone who didn't argue logically  or who sat back with a judgmental attitude rather than trying to understand my issue.  Big red flag guys!  

She didn’t argue back because she was over Bennett. Tayshia is, at heart, a nice person. Bennett being condescending about education was a deal breaker. He only got to stay another night because of production bringing him back. I can look at tayshia and see there are certain behaviors she wouldn’t tolerate in a man and smugness and meanness are some. She’s a nice woman who prefers nice guys and you can tell by looking at her favorites.

and Bennett was gaslighting. he was questioning her integrity by insinuated she was not giving Noah a rose because she likes him but for some producer-driven rrason. No Bennett she likes Noah and likes him more than you. 

 

Edited by dirtypop90
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11 hours ago, saber5055 said:

That lie detector is so bogus. Jojo is hitting a button to turn the bulbs on. So STUPID. She's on a laptop, not a lie detector. Morons. And poor Zac is going to fall for it with his cheating answer.

Jojo is screwing with these poor guys. I HATE this. That "heartbeat" thing is just a screensaver on the PC.

Right. I have only learned about polygraph machines from television,  but I thought the only accepted answers were yes or no, extra words not allowed.

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49 minutes ago, dirtypop90 said:

Bennett was gaslighting. he was questioning her integrity by insinuated she was not giving Noah a rose because she likes him but for some producer-driven rrason.

What now?   She did argue back, but it wasn't in defense of  Noah,  it was in defense of herself. 

She said Bennett was questioning her integrity by telling Noah he had zero chance of winning.  Bennett didn't say a word about producer driven reasons, did he?  Where does the "gaslighting" come in?  When did he try to convince Tayshia she was crazy?

Look, I don't like Bennett.   I think he's a jerk and not very smart, Harvard or no Harvard, but that has nothing to do with whether or not Tayshia acts like a scolding schoolmarm when she's angry.

I was hoping she would light into Bennett for being condescending and insulting to Noah, but if she did ,I didn't hear that.   (I might have missed something.)

I don't doubt she's a "nice person," but so far she's seemed very self-involved to me.  She loves it when men "open up" to her, but then after they've bared their soul, she always seems more tickled that they've told her than caring about what they've actually said.

Edited by JudyObscure
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13 minutes ago, JudyObscure said:

What now?   She did argue back, but it wasn't in defense of  Noah,  it was in defense of herself. 

She said Bennett was questioning her integrity by telling Noah he had zero chance of winning.  Bennett didn't say a word about producer driven reasons, did he?  Where does the "gaslighting" come in?  When did he try to convince Tayshia she was crazy?

Look, I don't like Bennett.   I think he's a jerk and not very smart, Harvard or no Harvard, but that has nothing to do with whether or not Tayshia acts like a scolding schoolmarm when she's angry.

I was hoping she would light into Bennett for being condescending and insulting to Noah, but if she did ,I didn't hear that.   (I might have missed something.)

I don't doubt she's a "nice person," but so far she's seemed very self-involved to me.  She loves it when men "open up" to her, but then after they've bared their soul, she always seems more tickled that they've told her than caring about what they've actually said.

I had hoped she would have confronted Bennett for the obvious too.  It was clear that between the present and other things Bennett was saying, she had an open door to let Bennett have it to some degree.  I would agree it was best to not say much, had she not spoken to both of them like they were 5 year old children (when she is the one that called this big meeting knowing there were issues between the two).  But once she asked them to come and air it out, well it seems dumb to say, "do I have to listen to this?"  lol

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