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Brandon & Julia


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One of the youngest 90 Day Fiancé season 8 couples, Brandon and Julia, come from backgrounds as different as chalk and cheese. It took just five months (and one meeting for Brandon, who works at his parents’ farm) before he proposed to go-go dancer Julia. The Russian-born girl was introduced to Brandon via a friend who’d seen her dancing at a club. The friend decided to make them meet via a video call. With Julia arriving on her K-1 visa, the American 90 Day Fiancé star faces financial difficulties. He's spent all his money on his lady love, and his parents (who now support him) expect Julia to accept their conservative rules. They also want her to work on their farm!

https://twitter.com/90DayFiance/status/1330692332774191106

 

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Brandon, listen to me:  She will not want to work the farm, ever.  (As a shelter adopter/current foster mom to a fur kitty I have an issue with the breeding business but I will let that go.)

You are bringing Miss Wild n Crazy to the farm and your mom, who right now seems okay (I know that will come back to bite me, lol) is basically going to urinate around you to mark her territory.  Yes I have sons and yes we are close but dammit, they gotta fly the nest!  Maybe that is the problem - he is not really flying, he is playing house on their dime.

The parents are going to probably get some kickback for expecting her to work, but if she has no job, she SHOULD be working with them/for them.  Then again, I am 55 and would have been up, making breakfast for them and asking how can I help?  As would most people......

 

 

Edited by Mrs. Hanson
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Brandon seems...different. I don't want to offend by talking about male/female qualities and stereotypes, but so far he's not even coming across as though he's attracted to girls or anyone else. He looks like he's still going through the cooties phase. 

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21 minutes ago, mamadrama said:

Brandon seems...different. I don't want to offend by talking about male/female qualities and stereotypes, but so far he's not even coming across as though he's attracted to girls or anyone else. He looks like he's still going through the cooties phase. 

You mean like he is twelve?  I agree.  I am happily surprised he has a full time job, he seems like he would be playing video games non stop in the basement.

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17 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Brandon, listen to me:  She will not want to work the farm, ever.  (As a shelter adopter/current foster mom to a fur kitty I have an issue with the breeding business but I will let that go.)

Me too.

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5 hours ago, mamadrama said:

Brandon seems...different. I don't want to offend by talking about male/female qualities and stereotypes, but so far he's not even coming across as though he's attracted to girls or anyone else. He looks like he's still going through the cooties phase. 

 

5 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

You mean like he is twelve?  I agree.  I am happily surprised he has a full time job, he seems like he would be playing video games non stop in the basement.

Seriously.  If he didn't have a real job, I would think he was a young teenager.  This whole situation is a bit creepy to me.  I understand and agree with the parents wanting him and Julia to not share a room as it is their house and the couple is not yet married, but it sounds as though the mother didn't reserve enough rooms for him to have a separate room in DC.  That is just illogical.   She is okay with them sleeping together as long as it isn't under her roof?  Well, I sorta get that she doesn't want to know they are in bed together in her house, but they are in bed together in the hotel and she is in the same hotel.   Even with that logic, it is probably sending him mixed messages.  I wanted to like them, but I just can't.  And Ma is just too much into their sex life--or lack of it.  Is she so focused on contraception, she isn't focused on Stds which would be at least an equal concern for me, not that I would be making appts for a prospective DIL with my GYN without permission.  He seems almost to be bragging about the debt he is incurring. And he just seemed so immature in his disdain for condoms.    And don't get me started on the dog breeding issue... 

My grade for this family is an I, and it doesn't stand for incomplete.  It stands for "ick"

Edited by Twopper
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Brandon strikes me as a classic case of "failure to launch."

I was somewhat shocked to see he has gainful employment.

I think he should have stuck with the farmer dating site.  

I can't wait to see Julia being awakened at the asscrack of dawn to help with the farming chores, wearing her rubber knee-high boots to muck the stalls and then trudging over to feed the pigs.

Maybe she should watch "Son-In-Law" with Pauley Shore and get some tips on adapting to life on the farm (I love that ridiculous movie).  

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I assume their refusal to allow them to sleep together in their home is because they are not yet married.  Because lots of parents allow their married children to share rooms with their spouses and yes sex does go on.  If you have a hang up about your son having sex in your home under any circumstances you need therapy.

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1 hour ago, mamadrama said:

At first I wondered if the parents were homophobic. He blushed at the non-joke about him being gay, and later they admitted that they were "so worried about him" that they signed him up for a dating site.

My hubby's mom bought him a subscription to EHarmony when he turned 40 and had not married.  He went on one date and it did not launch.  Parents, stay out of your kid's love/romantic lives.  Never goes well nor ends well.

 

1 hour ago, Persnickety1 said:

I can't wait to see Julia being awakened at the asscrack of dawn to help with the farming chores, wearing her rubber knee-high boots to muck the stalls and then trudging over to feed the pigs.

I would pay to watch that.

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I may be not watching this season, not sure if I have the energy for the parental interferring nonsense, fish out of water story line as in the stupid questions being asked like, "do they have cows in your country?" and the "I gave up everything to be with you" crap.  And the bickering and wondering if they really know eachother at all but they are getting married....yeah, all of that crap.

Edited by Baltimore Betty
Bickering.
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On 12/7/2020 at 11:59 AM, Twopper said:

She is okay with them sleeping together as long as it isn't under her roof?  Well

It may be a generational thing but I understand the parents home rules.  They don’t seem to disagree nor disapprove of the couple being intimate, just not where they can hear it.  Mom even commented that they may sneak to each other’s room in the middle of the night.  They are not making any threats, just expectations.

As to these young women who refuse to use contraception because they do not want anything “foreign” or “unnatural “ in their bodies...really?  What do you think a penis is? And piercings? Tatoos? Makeup?

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1 hour ago, hisbunkie said:

Mom even commented that they may sneak to each other’s room in the middle of the night.

Well I would hope in any multigenerational household people would be considerate.  I’m sure he doesn’t want to hear his parents either.

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On 12/7/2020 at 1:25 PM, mamadrama said:

At first I wondered if the parents were homophobic. He blushed at the non-joke about him being gay, and later they admitted that they were "so worried about him" that they signed him up for a dating site.

Oh...I never thought of that. They totally look like the Pray the Gay Away types

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I don't understand why he can't at least move a doublewide onto the farm. Pest Control workers earn one of the best incomes where I live. Our Terminix guy earns around $55,000 a year. That may not sound like a lot, but average income here is about $22,000. Brandon's family presumably own their land and that's one of the biggest costs in building. 

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9 hours ago, mamadrama said:

I don't understand why he can't at least move a doublewide onto the farm. Pest Control workers earn one of the best incomes where I live. Our Terminix guy earns around $55,000 a year. That may not sound like a lot, but average income here is about $22,000. Brandon's family presumably own their land and that's one of the biggest costs in building. 

I wondered that, too.  He has a 40 hour a week job (maybe more) so how is affording your own place such a challenge?  I guess the airfare and hotels to Iceland and France get a bit spendy.  

I hope Julia is playing us with all the "I no use birth control and I am FINE without it!"  I was BC'd every which wat from Sunday back in the day.  Are today's younger generation that careless?  Or are we being played?

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Yes, many of the younger generation are that careless.  One reason is they expect everyone else to help/pay and another is that there is a rejection of knowledge/experience of those who are older.  Sigh.

However, there are also many who are very responsible.

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Anyone remember Brandon's familial history? It seemed a bit convoluted when he mentioned it, and now I don't remember the deets. The parents are such an odd couple, controlling their son yet promoting and enjoying his journey to manhood. Their interest and glee on their faces is quite perverted. This is dad's third marriage? He has grown siblings? Yet, he lives at home. I wish I would have paid better attention.

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10 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

 

I hope Julia is playing us with all the "I no use birth control and I am FINE without it!"  I was BC'd every which wat from Sunday back in the day.  Are today's younger generation that careless?  Or are we being played?

Maybe it is my hopeful self talking but I think she meant that she can’t take the pill or any or it’s derivatives. For medical reasons I can’t either. She spoke about ‘not drinking medicine as the doctors said it is bad for my body.’ She may have been trying to communicate a medical issue that is none of mommas business and momma was an asshole for saying’oh modern birth control Is fine dear.’  Fuck off, you don’t know her medical history...... tell your coddled son to wear a damn condom and mind your own business. The responsibility is not Julia’s alone.

Edited by sainte-chapelle
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16 hours ago, seacliffsal said:

Yes, many of the younger generation are that careless.  One reason is they expect everyone else to help/pay and another is that there is a rejection of knowledge/experience of those who are older.  Sigh.

However, there are also many who are very responsible.

And yet teen birthrates have never been lower than they are now. 

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On 12/7/2020 at 8:42 AM, mamadrama said:

Brandon seems...different. I don't want to offend by talking about male/female qualities and stereotypes, but so far he's not even coming across as though he's attracted to girls or anyone else. He looks like he's still going through the cooties phase. 

I think that comes from his emotional immaturity. He talks as if he’s a very immature 15yrs old boy, not a grown ass man of 27. 

On 12/7/2020 at 9:05 AM, Mrs. Hanson said:

You mean like he is twelve?  I agree.  I am happily surprised he has a full time job, he seems like he would be playing video games non stop in the basement.

I think getting some type a job was a condition of living under his parents roof after HS. It seems from his intro that he was his Dad’s last kid, and Mom’s only, his Dad was tired from all the divorces and raising kids and his older age, and let Mom do whatever. She did expect him to have some type of job but didn’t expect him to leave the nest. 

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On 12/7/2020 at 10:59 AM, Twopper said:

I understand and agree with the parents wanting him and Julia to not share a room as it is their house and the couple is not yet married, but it sounds as though the mother didn't reserve enough rooms for him to have a separate room in DC.  That is just illogical.   She is okay with them sleeping together as long as it isn't under her roof?  Well, I sorta get that she doesn't want to know they are in bed together in her house, but they are in bed together in the hotel and she is in the same hotel. 

This I kinda get. My Mom would be the same way. What you do in your house, on your dime, in a hotel is your business. Her house is her business, and her stance was that she didn’t bring men home to our house for sex so I shouldn’t either. (Which I didn’t do)
 

Now I’m a grown woman with my own house and if I was going on a trip with a fiancé I wouldn’t be asking my Mom to pay for our hotel room! Nor would she cover the ticket for them to visit/move in with me. Brandon wants all the benefits of being an “adult” but none of the responsibilities. 

Edited to add- Also how is he so broke? He has been working full time with no "adult" bills. Pest control can be a good income for someone without higher education- with a cell phone bill, gas, insurance, toiletries and pocket money being his only expenses for the last decade where has all of his money been going?

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38 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Edited to add- Also how is he so broke? He has been working full time with no "adult" bills. Pest control can be a good income for someone without higher education- with a cell phone bill, gas, insurance, toiletries and pocket money being his only expenses for the last decade where has all of his money been going?

if I understood correctly-- which may not be the case as I was folding laundry and  drinking eggnog liberally laced with bourbon at the time--Brandon and his parents went  to France and another country where they met up with Julia and her parents.  I think all or most of it was on Brandon's dime in which case I can see how he ended up in debt.  Also I am sure that gave Julia and her family the impression that he had money.  I would be past annoyed if I were Julia and found I had to live down on the farm and help with chores because he had spent lots of money on those two trips. 

Helicopter Ma and the dinner where they discussed birth control --or the lack thereof---was beyond awkward. 

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2 minutes ago, Twopper said:

if I understood correctly-- which may not be the case as I was folding laundry and  drinking eggnog liberally laced with bourbon at the time--Brandon and his parents went  to France and another country where they met up with Julia and her parents.  I think all or most of it was on Brandon's dime in which case I can see how he ended up in debt.  Also I am sure that gave Julia and her family the impression that he had money.  I would be past annoyed if I were Julia and found I had to live down on the farm and help with chores because he had spent lots of money on those two trips. 

Helicopter Ma and the dinner where they discussed birth control --or the lack thereof---was beyond awkward. 

I get that he took Julia on some trips (including meeting up in France) and now hes got a lot of credit card debt from that- but why didnt he have money saved BEFORE he met Julia. Given that he isnt living independently but is making an adult salary with no student loans....

Eggnog is delicious.

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1 hour ago, Scarlett45 said:

I get that he took Julia on some trips (including meeting up in France) and now hes got a lot of credit card debt from that- but why didnt he have money saved BEFORE he met Julia. Given that he isnt living independently but is making an adult salary with no student loans....

Eggnog is delicious.

Do we know how long he has had that job?  And I think it was not only Julia, but her parents and his parents.  Two international trips with airfare, lodging, meals.   I don't think he is the brightest bulb in the 90 day chandelier so I expect he didn't know how to get the cheaper fares by buying off season and months ahead.  Probably got a pricier hotel to impress Julia and fam.   I hope he has at least bought his own car.  I can hear him now planning a date night asking "Ma, can we take your car?"

Eggnog is indeed delish especially if i make it with my mom's recipe which is a real  pain.

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1 hour ago, Twopper said:

Do we know how long he has had that job?  And I think it was not only Julia, but her parents and his parents.  Two international trips with airfare, lodging, meals.   I don't think he is the brightest bulb in the 90 day chandelier so I expect he didn't know how to get the cheaper fares by buying off season and months ahead.  Probably got a pricier hotel to impress Julia and fam.   I hope he has at least bought his own car.  I can hear him now planning a date night asking "Ma, can we take your car?"

Eggnog is indeed delish especially if i make it with my mom's recipe which is a real  pain.

You have a good point. 

 

On 12/14/2020 at 6:44 PM, itsadryheat said:

Anyone remember Brandon's familial history? It seemed a bit convoluted when he mentioned it, and now I don't remember the deets. The parents are such an odd couple, controlling their son yet promoting and enjoying his journey to manhood. Their interest and glee on their faces is quite perverted. This is dad's third marriage? He has grown siblings? Yet, he lives at home. I wish I would have paid better attention.

Brandon is his father's youngest and from the looks of it his Mom's only child- he said he had 4 half sisters and 1 half brother, no full siblings. He never lived with them and they are all much older (so probably between 35-45yrs old). Yes this is his father's 3rd marriage.

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This doesn't seem to have been said here, amazingly, but...Brandon isn't ready to step up to the plate to double bag it, but is totally fine with supporting a kid for the next 18 years? How does that work?

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47 minutes ago, Ucross said:

This doesn't seem to have been said here, amazingly, but...Brandon isn't ready to step up to the plate to double bag it, but is totally fine with supporting a kid for the next 18 years? How does that work?

Because some people (Brandon) aren’t emotionally mature.

And given that he’s not the one that has to be pregnant, go through labor/delivery and then carry the bulk of the emotional responsibility (as well as financially responsibility)of raising said children to adulthood*, if the woman who would have to do those things isn’t concerned why should he be? 
 

Also he knows his parents will bail him out financially. 
 

*in our society most of the physical, financial and emotional work of raising children fall on women if a relationship falls a part. I’m not insinuating that there aren’t great single dads doing their part/raising their kids on their own, but as a trend it falls on women 

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51 minutes ago, Ucross said:

This doesn't seem to have been said here, amazingly, but...Brandon isn't ready to step up to the plate to double bag it, but is totally fine with supporting a kid for the next 18 years? How does that work?

I don’t think it was the bother of obtaining it and putting it on, I think he said the reason was it doesn’t feel as good.  That kind of focus on pleasure/immediate gratification is consistent with having an unwanted child. 

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On 12/17/2020 at 8:31 PM, MrBuhBye said:

Yeah I have read people in their 20s are less promiscuous than their predecessors.  Whatever works for them.

There are a lot of reasons for that I’ve read- more 20 somethings live with their parents, ease of access to porn due to smart phones, etc. 

Yeah I’m fine with whatever people want to do- so long as it’s in their own house on their own dime. Brandon’s mom is just too much, but when you want to live like an adolescent you get treated like one.

Likely Brandon doesn’t have all that much experience with women, and while it only takes one instance of vaginal penile intercourse to conceive, your chances of conceiving are much lower if you aren’t having partnered sex on the regular. It’s 2020 but many still feel contraceptives are a woman’s responsibility. Brandon is responsible for himself. 

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On 12/7/2020 at 12:58 PM, Persnickety1 said:

Brandon strikes me as a classic case of "failure to launch."

I was somewhat shocked to see he has gainful employment.

I think he should have stuck with the farmer dating site.  

I can't wait to see Julia being awakened at the asscrack of dawn to help with the farming chores, wearing her rubber knee-high boots to muck the stalls and then trudging over to feed the pigs.

Maybe she should watch "Son-In-Law" with Pauley Shore and get some tips on adapting to life on the farm (I love that ridiculous movie).  

Lol failure to launch is a great saying!  I'm going to be using that one in real life!  Lol

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On 12/13/2020 at 9:29 PM, MrBuhBye said:

Well I would hope in any multigenerational household people would be considerate.  I’m sure he doesn’t want to hear his parents either.

What do you think is the age difference in the parents?  20 or 30 years of more?

On 12/14/2020 at 9:04 AM, Mrs. Hanson said:

I wondered that, too.  He has a 40 hour a week job (maybe more) so how is affording your own place such a challenge?  I guess the airfare and hotels to Iceland and France get a bit spendy.  

I hope Julia is playing us with all the "I no use birth control and I am FINE without it!"  I was BC'd every which wat from Sunday back in the day.  Are today's younger generation that careless?  Or are we being played?

We're being played in all things 90 Day!!!!

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