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S04.E14: Hard Habit To Break


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20 hours ago, Sir RaiderDuck OMS said:

Methinks Lana knows English waaaaaaay better than she's letting on.

 

It's weird that a couple of 45-year-old women think their 48-year-old brother, were he still alive, would have time to be their 24/7 wingman/enforcer/whatever and not be occupied with his own wife and kids.

As for their cars: As someone leasing his third straight Nissan Sentra*, I wouldn't describe a late model Altima as "dumpy." However, grown adults do not normally graduate straight from Nissans to Jaguars unless they win the lottery or something.

 

*No, I'm not the world's most boring guy when it comes to cars. Why do you ask?😋

If they stopped spending their money on plastic surgery, make-up, clothes and chasing dick all around the world they could both afford Maseratis!

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(edited)

Just Google "Christian Exotic Dancer 90 Day Fiance" instead of Stripper.

Google differentiates between the two job descriptions....nice to know

https://starcasm.net/before-the-90-days-did-martas-legal-issues-prevent-her-trip-to-algeria-spoilers/

You can find all the iterations of 90Day on the TLC site.

Marta was supposed to be on Season 2.

 

Edited by humbleopinion
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5 hours ago, blubld43 said:

That last part is what makes him dangerous, IMO.  When something happens that forces him to see the truth, he will explode.  The segment with him going to her apartment to see her "whether she likes it or not!" really showed his true feelings.

I was listening to a podcast (90 day cray cray) and the guy brought up a really good point about how scary it would be to have someone hire a private investigator in ukranian because apparently many of them are ex-military.  

To have a private citizen with military training and probable access to private information, who is basically for hire and is trying to find your personal address and location is pretty scary.  

I hope Lana lives with someone.  She thinks she thwarted David by not giving him her address.  The next private investigator may not have any qualms about using every tool at his disposal to get Lana's address.  

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38 minutes ago, RealReality said:

I was listening to a podcast (90 day cray cray) and the guy brought up a really good point about how scary it would be to have someone hire a private investigator in ukranian because apparently many of them are ex-military.  

To have a private citizen with military training and probable access to private information, who is basically for hire and is trying to find your personal address and location is pretty scary.  

I hope Lana lives with someone.  She thinks she thwarted David by not giving him her address.  The next private investigator may not have any qualms about using every tool at his disposal to get Lana's address.  

Didn't Lana get up and leave after David told her he had hired a private investigator?  She seemed freaked out.

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1 hour ago, RealReality said:

I was listening to a podcast (90 day cray cray) and the guy brought up a really good point about how scary it would be to have someone hire a private investigator in ukranian because apparently many of them are ex-military.  

To have a private citizen with military training and probable access to private information, who is basically for hire and is trying to find your personal address and location is pretty scary.  

I hope Lana lives with someone.  She thinks she thwarted David by not giving him her address.  The next private investigator may not have any qualms about using every tool at his disposal to get Lana's address.  

That's my favorite 90DayFiance podcast. When Kyle imitates Lisa's grunts and speaking, he makes me cry-laugh. 

How seriously can any PI take this case, an American nutjob who spends all his time on scammy dating websites trying to find a nonexistent woman? It's TLC who found "Lana". These PIs can scam David also, dragging out "leads" and such, just to keep getting paid. David is beyond any sense of logic and reason. 

 

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On 5/25/2020 at 12:39 AM, deirdra said:

They were the flowers he gave her the night before, on their first date. They took separate cars, so she must have followed him home. 😉

My heart swelled with pride and gratitude when Mary was able to take her leave in her OWN vehicle. Something Varya was unable to do at that time. And no, Varya, the homes/acreage you passed on the way to Geoffrey's house do not "look just like Russia." At least not all the concrete jungle parts we were shown. 

I'm tender towards Mary because I too had a Mary moment many years ago. Fortunately, my reliable car was parked right outside. No scene, no words, just a look in the eyes to quickly read the room, so to speak. 

13 hours ago, Zevious Zoquis said:

If he was actually open to receiving real  input from outside the fantasy realm that exists in his own head he'd recognize the obvious fact that the woman he's bowling with is completely not into him.  

How about when he put his hands on her hips during some phony bowling lesson? If Lana were to begin chattering & yuking it up, David would reject her, I'm positive. He prefers the porcelain (?blow-up) doll type. 

10 hours ago, blubld43 said:

That last part is what makes him dangerous, IMO.  When something happens that forces him to see the truth, he will explode.  The segment with him going to her apartment to see her "whether she likes it or not!" really showed his true feelings.

David showed anger at his Russian friend/translator when she simply repeated what the PI was saying over the phone. He also did that angry, scary lip vibrating thing right before he fired Sergei in person. This guy is unhinged and quite frightening, imo. I wonder if he's never married because of anger issues. Has he ever had a longterm gf or wife?

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On 5/24/2020 at 8:31 PM, spunky said:

Lana's probably secretly happy that she did not give that creep her real address. His behavior was stalkerish. Vayra must have learned English by listening to Ludacris albums. 

I think his behavior is beyond stalkerish.  He strikes me as someone who could absolutely be a rapist.  He feels entitled to what HE wants and cannot bear the idea that Lana is, first of all, a person and second of all, NOT at all into him.  He needs a translator app that simply says, “Stop bothering Lana!”  He is truly frightening.

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On 5/25/2020 at 1:59 AM, gavinmac said:

 

I love how Ed told his mom the breakup was because Rose wouldn't talk about her past. Ed and Rose solved the issue with "the past" on Day One.  She told him some B.S. about having only one boyfriend before , and he accepted her answer. that's not why they broke up. But basically, Ed told his mom Rose is a slut/whore with a "past" and that's what the breakup was about.

He's not Australian, even though he's been living there like 10-15 years?  I don't know why she'd think this could be resolved in a few months.

 

When did Varya become such a crazy lady? Was her rejection of his proposal just a power move designed to show him who is the boss and the relationship that backfired terribly? Now she's acting very jealous and entitled for a woman who turned down a dude's proposal.

 

I didn’t see Varya saying she needed more time as a no.  It was just, slow down, we have only known each other for two weeks.  He gaslit the shit out of her blaming her for ending the relationship when she really didn’t.  That was Geoffrey manipulating her by deliberately misunderstanding what she said to get even with her.  He is such an abusive fuck.

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On 5/25/2020 at 9:47 AM, blubld43 said:

With all the shenanigans last night I almost forgot David.  Did anyone else see the flash of anger when she refused to go to his hotel room??  Asking for the "affection he needs" or some such bs; what he's saying is that she's bought and paid for, and she better put out.

I believe in my bones that the man could be dangerous if rejected.  Just like Geoffrey.

100 percent.  David is terrifying 

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On 5/25/2020 at 1:54 PM, LabScientist said:

Too funny! My husband was a professional bowler when we were first married. We tried to find any evidence of David being a pro, but couldn't find anything on him. I think he was a professional in his own mind.

Just like in his own mind he believes that Lana is madly in love with him and that his black leather coat is fashionable.

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On 5/26/2020 at 12:35 AM, Texasmom1970 said:

My television did not tape the full episode due to thunderstorms. From comments I am glad I missed the cemetery scene. In August 2018 my daughter Madison passed away; she was only 12. Seeing that would have upset me in so many ways.

I am so very sorry for your loss.  May Madison’s memory be for a blessing.

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1 hour ago, KariLois said:

I think his behavior is beyond stalkerish.  He strikes me as someone who could absolutely be a rapist.  He feels entitled to what HE wants and cannot bear the idea that Lana is, first of all, a person and second of all, NOT at all into him.  He needs a translator app that simply says, “Stop bothering Lana!”  He is truly frightening.

I got that impression of him as well. He doesn’t seem to take rejection well which has been indicated by his behavior all season. Poor Lana is visibly repulsed by him and with good reason.

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2 hours ago, Rt66vintage said:

And no, Varya, the homes/acreage you passed on the way to Geoffrey's house do not "look just like Russia." At least not all the concrete jungle parts we were shown. 

What about the grassy slope where Geoffrey picked some flowers/weeds as his gift to Varya's mother?  Or the camping area? 😉

2 minutes ago, magemaud said:

No wife, but two ex fiancees somewhere along the way

Real ex-fiancées? or just in his mind?

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9 hours ago, Rt66vintage said:

My heart swelled with pride and gratitude when Mary was able to take her leave in her OWN vehicle. Something Varya was unable to do at that time. And no, Varya, the homes/acreage you passed on the way to Geoffrey's house do not "look just like Russia." At least not all the concrete jungle parts we were shown. 

Ha ha, your comment is funny because they really did show a lot of the Communist style, bleak buildings. They were sure pushing that aesthetic. Varya is right, though, in that eastern Tennessee does look like parts of Siberia: rolling foothills gradually leading to rounded mountains, farms, creeks and rivers, lots of fog over valleys...There are some beautiful rural areas. The first time I went there I was a little disappointed because it looked so much like home. (I'm not from Knoxville, but same geographic area.) The cities, though, can be colorless and bleak. Knoxville as a town would definitely win most contests. 

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After watching many seasons of the 90 Day Fiance, Before, During and After shows it has made me wonder about the real life 90 Day mindset and processes. I just watched called "Love Me," the similarities to David and the men in the doc were interesting, they all had to pay to write letters to the women, some men spent thousands but had no luck actually getting a wife, they had group trips to the Ukraine, bus loads of men that just did not look like they are winning in life going to organized mixers where the women on the website were waiting to meet these men, it looked dire, sad and a little suspicious.  Engagement rings in their pockets, hopes were high but these women were not falling over these men, accepting rings, or even looking interested but yet, these men like David kept coming back for more but not getting the desired end result.

What do we call that culture of men that make it so awkward with women and the women that participate?  They all have to know it is a game, David's determination to chase down Lana becomes an obsession, Lana's determination to keep David's money coming in thru the website...there are thousands of Davids yet no one wants to quit this farce, why? Those men have got to realize they won't get the girl and they will go broke trying.

 

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A variation of this was played for laughs on Big Bang Theory as Howard and Raj, brilliant academically but awkward with women, thought they were entitled to supermodels.   Howard eventually fell in love and married, but not before wondering if he should wait to see if “someone better” came along.   His friends convinced him that a wonderful woman who loved him and who he loved was what everyone should be looking for.   
 

It is also like this Incel movement.  They don’t really want a relationship, they want a hot woman who has sex with them as a trophy.  They don’t see women as people who have their own needs and desires.   They are often the “nice guy” who turns viscous when rejected.  
 

This reminds me of David.  

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1 hour ago, DEL901 said:

A variation of this was played for laughs on Big Bang Theory as Howard and Raj, brilliant academically but awkward with women, thought they were entitled to supermodels.   Howard eventually fell in love and married, but not before wondering if he should wait to see if “someone better” came along.   His friends convinced him that a wonderful woman who loved him and who he loved was what everyone should be looking for.   
 

It is also like this Incel movement.  They don’t really want a relationship, they want a hot woman who has sex with them as a trophy.  They don’t see women as people who have their own needs and desires.   They are often the “nice guy” who turns viscous when rejected.  
 

This reminds me of David.  

Love the "Big Bang Theory".  So sad that show is done.  Raj also showed emotional growth in his relationship with that character who had social anxiety disorder (forget her name).  He made a date with her in a library I think where she could sit across from him and text him so she wouldn't have to speak showing he cared about her needs.  And although she was a cute girl she was not supermodel gorgeous.  There's maybe  a difference between emotional immaturity and emotional selfishness.  I don't really know what to call David except that I agree he is very one sided--only caring about how he feels and about what he wants.  I also see Lana trying to fend off David's physical advances, but I thought the first time they met she gave him a nice enough hug (even though she was looking at the camera while she hugged him).  But after the third or fourth time of David pawing at her she was not responsive.  At this point anyone who is able to read any social cues would back off and give the other person some space.  David just plows ahead saying oh I'm the man it's up to me to initiate physical contact and overcome her "shyness".   Howard and Raj just had to grow up; David needs professional help.

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13 hours ago, KariLois said:

I think his behavior is beyond stalkerish.  He strikes me as someone who could absolutely be a rapist.  He feels entitled to what HE wants and cannot bear the idea that Lana is, first of all, a person and second of all, NOT at all into him.  He needs a translator app that simply says, “Stop bothering Lana!”  He is truly frightening.

Yes, I agree that in some ways he is worse than Ed.  Lana is NOT into him, probably will never be in to him, and yet David yammers on and on and ON about needing "appropriate" affection from him and asks her to go back to his hotel.  

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(edited)
6 hours ago, Gobi said:

IIRC, both were also Ukrainian, so how legitimate the "engagements" were is an open question.

I must have missed him saying this, but I guess it's very possible there were two other "Lanas"  (at least in David's fantasy) before the current one. 

I wonder if he gave them CZs, too, so just in case the engagement didn't work out he wouldn't be out the cost of a diamond. 

Edited by magemaud
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22 minutes ago, magemaud said:

I wonder if he gave them CZs, too, so just in case the engagement didn't work out he wouldn't be out the cost of a diamond. 

Ding! Ding!

David's choice of a CZ to propose to Lana comes out of being burned from one or both of his past engagements when he offered a real diamond and when the fiance broke it off she kept the diamond and he lost the $299 ring.

With a CZ he spent $29.99.

Thinking "appropriate affection" will have to be unlimited open mouth kissing, over the clothing and above the Mason Dixon Line groping and modeling of his polyester teddy gift....pass the barf bag first then the brain bleach....

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35 minutes ago, humbleopinion said:

Ding! Ding!

David's choice of a CZ to propose to Lana comes out of being burned from one or both of his past engagements when he offered a real diamond and when the fiance broke it off she kept the diamond and he lost the $299 ring.

With a CZ he spent $29.99.

Thinking "appropriate affection" will have to be unlimited open mouth kissing, over the clothing and above the Mason Dixon Line groping and modeling of his polyester teddy gift....pass the barf bag first then the brain bleach....

😱😱😱😱😱

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(edited)
17 hours ago, KariLois said:

I didn’t see Varya saying she needed more time as a no.  It was just, slow down, we have only known each other for two weeks.  He gaslit the shit out of her blaming her for ending the relationship when she really didn’t.  That was Geoffrey manipulating her by deliberately misunderstanding what she said to get even with her.  He is such an abusive fuck.

I think "slow down we have only known each other two weeks" is a perfectly sensible response to a marriage proposal except in the fast-moving, high stakes, musical chairs game of online Russian bride hunting.  

Edited by gavinmac
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I don’t know where TLC found all of these trash individuals but my goodness. The only one I’m rooting for is Rose because she had more of a backbone than anybody else. I don’t mind Erica because I think she was an unwitting pawn in Steph’s continued attempts to claw her way into 15 minutes of fame. 

Ed was a retconning like a soap opera. Rose decided she wanted kids and didn’t trust me or vice versa. No buddy. You treated her like scum, lied to her after you got what you wanted, paid her child no attention, and she said enough was enough. Then for him to admit he wasn’t ready to be a stepfather was even more jarring. Disgusting that he would pursue a woman with a small child. Call it as it is. He wanted to get his 🍆 wet. He’s a sex tourist and he had no honest intentions with Rose.

Geoff aka Dahmer being so manipulative and gaslighting. You could tell he was foaming at the mouth over Mary/Varya getting into it. I feel sorry for poor foolish Mary. She fails to realise she will always be Plan B. She poured out her heart before he left, and he rejected her. He has married several other women, had girlfriends, and he even told her she was going to be a life partner or friend. That shows he’s not serious about her.

Lisa is just disgusting and rude. She couldn’t act civilised for a few hours around his family. God. Who or what raised that feral she-wolf? She was on live last night and terrorising people saying we’ll probably see her another 15 weeks on our screens. Yuck and no thank you.

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3 hours ago, AussieBabe said:

I don’t know where TLC found all of these trash individuals but my goodness. The only one I’m rooting for is Rose because she had more of a backbone than anybody else. I don’t mind Erica because I think she was an unwitting pawn in Steph’s continued attempts to claw her way into 15 minutes of fame. 

Ed was a retconning like a soap opera. Rose decided she wanted kids and didn’t trust me or vice versa. No buddy. You treated her like scum, lied to her after you got what you wanted, paid her child no attention, and she said enough was enough. Then for him to admit he wasn’t ready to be a stepfather was even more jarring. Disgusting that he would pursue a woman with a small child. Call it as it is. He wanted to get his 🍆 wet. He’s a sex tourist and he had no honest intentions with Rose.

Geoff aka Dahmer being so manipulative and gaslighting. You could tell he was foaming at the mouth over Mary/Varya getting into it. I feel sorry for poor foolish Mary. She fails to realise she will always be Plan B. She poured out her heart before he left, and he rejected her. He has married several other women, had girlfriends, and he even told her she was going to be a life partner or friend. That shows he’s not serious about her.

Lisa is just disgusting and rude. She couldn’t act civilised for a few hours around his family. God. Who or what raised that feral she-wolf? She was on live last night and terrorising people saying we’ll probably see her another 15 weeks on our screens. Yuck and no thank you.

She is probably right.  Shitty people are easy to hate watch and shit talk.  There is a line though and with some of the racial subtext I think she might be in the wrong side of the entertaining hate watch for me. 

I definately would watch a season of Lisa finally getting her comeuppance. 

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12 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

After watching many seasons of the 90 Day Fiance, Before, During and After shows it has made me wonder about the real life 90 Day mindset and processes. I just watched called "Love Me," the similarities to David and the men in the doc were interesting, they all had to pay to write letters to the women, some men spent thousands but had no luck actually getting a wife, they had group trips to the Ukraine, bus loads of men that just did not look like they are winning in life going to organized mixers where the women on the website were waiting to meet these men, it looked dire, sad and a little suspicious.  Engagement rings in their pockets, hopes were high but these women were not falling over these men, accepting rings, or even looking interested but yet, these men like David kept coming back for more but not getting the desired end result.

What do we call that culture of men that make it so awkward with women and the women that participate?  They all have to know it is a game, David's determination to chase down Lana becomes an obsession, Lana's determination to keep David's money coming in thru the website...there are thousands of Davids yet no one wants to quit this farce, why? Those men have got to realize they won't get the girl and they will go broke trying.

 

David reminds me a lot of the traits of the incel community. Also, I am 99% sure that David is in that documentary. 

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(edited)
40 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

He really does set off some alarms, doesn't he?

I just watched the "Love Me" Documentary, and after bathing in bleach, I can speak about it now.  The dude in Texas?  You did NOT have to kiss her full on, with open mouth and probing tongue when you kissed at your wedding.  We get it, you scored a hottie who owns no dresses that cover more than an inch of her ass and gian stripper heels to go grocery shopping in!

The guy was Wisconsin?  Guess he ended it when his "Soulmate" kept asking for money.

Glad the NC guy found a nice local girl, I do give him credit for wanting a woman in his age range.

The chubby HR guy?  With the gold rose? I laughed out lous when, when waiting for his soulmate, took a table away from everyone else so he "wouldn't be fighting off the other women while waiting for her!"  OMG!!!  One look in his living room explained why he is still single.

6 hours ago, AussieBabe said:

Lisa is just disgusting and rude. She couldn’t act civilised for a few hours around his family. God. Who or what raised that feral she-wolf? She was on live last night and terrorising people saying we’ll probably see her another 15 weeks on our screens. Yuck and no thank you.

I am sure the people of York PA are not claiming her!!  

Edited by Mrs. Hanson
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31 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

I just watched the "Love Me" Documentary, and after bathing in bleach, I can speak about it now.  The dude in Texas?  You did NOT have to kiss her full on, with open mouth and probing tongue when you kissed at your wedding.  We get it, you scored a hottie who owns no dresses that cover more than an inch of her ass and gian stripper heels to go grocery shopping in!

The guy was Wisconsin?  Guess he ended it when his "Soulmate" kept asking for money.

Glad the NC guy found a nice local girl, I do give him credit for wanting a woman in his age range.

The chubby HR guy?  With the gold rose? I laughed out loud when, when waiting for his soulmate, took a table away from everyone else so he "wouldn't be fighting off the other women while waiting for her!"  OMG!!!  One look in his living room explained why he is still single. 

Just finished the “Love Me” documentary as well. An hour of David clones (and I did look for him in the background). That kiss was over the top, but at least one couple seemed to be genuine (of the foreign ones). The head of the dating site never said whether the women get a cut of the money generated, I noticed.

At $10.00 per email (to and from) I can see how David went through $100K in seven years.

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12 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

I just watched the "Love Me" Documentary, and after bathing in bleach, I can speak about it now.  The dude in Texas?  You did NOT have to kiss her full on, with open mouth and probing tongue when you kissed at your wedding.  We get it, you scored a hottie who owns no dresses that cover more than an inch of her ass and gian stripper heels to go grocery shopping in!

The guy was Wisconsin?  Guess he ended it when his "Soulmate" kept asking for money.

Glad the NC guy found a nice local girl, I do give him credit for wanting a woman in his age range.

The chubby HR guy?  With the gold rose? I laughed out lous when, when waiting for his soulmate, took a table away from everyone else so he "wouldn't be fighting off the other women while waiting for her!"  OMG!!!  One look in his living room explained why he is still single.

I am sure the people of York PA are not claiming her!!  

We watched it last night, and - no lie - we said EVERYTHING you just said!!!

The chubby HR guy sitting alone looked just like David waiting for Lana in the cafe in Ukraine.  Flowers on the table (only his was "gold," so he didn't leave it for the waitress), just about twisting his neck out of joint looking at the door, and leaving alone.  

I can't believe a bus full of guys being transported from one get-together to another for the SOLE purpose of being hit on by fairly attractive women aren't smart enough to know that they are being taken for a ride (in more ways than one).  The whole busload of them were pathetic.

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24 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

We watched it last night, and - no lie - we said EVERYTHING you just said!!!

Why thank you!  Also - the guy who married - he could not remove his pen from his pocket while getting married?  And yes, I am overly focusing on that damn kiss - but it went on and on and ON while someone in the "audience" was saying:  "Oh so sweet!!  SWEEEEET!" over and over.  I would have been heaving on the floor.

The WIsconsin dairy farmer (and yes I did wonder who took care of the cows while he was gone) reminds me A LOT of many outstate farmers in Minnesota and Wisconsin.  Very nice, mannerly good guys but zero social skills with women. (Sound familiar with 90 Day, lol?)  

12 hours ago, Gobi said:

At $10.00 per email (to and from) I can see how David went through $100K in seven years.

There has got be a way to talk without going through the service.  Oh wait, I know:  FIND A GIRL WHO SPEAKS ENGLISH!  I went on "A Foreign Affair" and all the ladies had very limited English....shocker, right?  I am sure it is the same with David's service.

 

19 hours ago, AussieBabe said:

Who or what raised that feral she-wolf?

No drinking coffee while reading your comments.  She really is a she wolf, no?

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1 minute ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Why thank you!  Also - the guy who married - he could not remove his pen from his pocket while getting married?  And yes, I am overly focusing on that damn kiss - but it went on and on and ON while someone in the "audience" was saying:  "Oh so sweet!!  SWEEEEET!" over and over.  I would have been heaving on the floor.

Sadly, you are UNDERstating how horrendous that was.  And then he turned to the camera with a shit-eating grin on his face which screamed, "See what I just did?  You can't believe what I'm gonna do to her later."

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8 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

Sadly, you are UNDERstating how horrendous that was.  And then he turned to the camera with a shit-eating grin on his face which screamed, "See what I just did?  You can't believe what I'm gonna do to her later."

Ew where is the vomit emoji?  Thanks for the heads up.  Now I know to turn away at that point when I am watching. (Gotta pass the time somehow until the next new episode).

  • Love 2

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