19 Things I Hate About You: How the Duggars Infuriate

[graefin]

What annoys me is the Duggar women telling the People stylists "no haircuts" when that's the one damn thing they all could use the most. Here you have professional people that do magazine shoots and you don't take advantage of it and at least get a good trim?

But a woman's hair is her glooory! It's taken them over 20 years to grow their weedy manes that long; they aren't going to let someone hack at it now. Have you noticed that all of them (Anna, Jana, Jinger) seem to have longer hair now than they used to? They remind me of cave women.

[Foghorn Leghorn]

But a woman's hair is her glooory! It's taken them over 20 years to grow their weedy manes that long; they aren't going to let someone hack at it now. Have you noticed that all of them (Anna, Jana, Jinger) seem to have longer hair now than they used to? They remind me of cave women.

 

I did notice in the 14K episode Michelle's hair was much longer but more mullet style back then.  It looks better now but not by much!

[AmyFarrahFowler]

I so wish I had been there when they deliberately hurt that cat.   I would of kicked Bin in the face, then hit the other one (cant remember who it was) with a truck.

       

 

Can someone tell me which episode this is? I've not seen them all this season yet.

[Sunnybobs]

I think it was a video posted to one of their Instagram accounts not an episode.

[hlemommy]

Wasn't it derrick who almost ran over the cat not ben?

Edited May 1, 2015 by hlemommy

[Sunnybobs]

https://instagram.com/p/zrE6hfmCSv/

Yes it was Derrick but Ben was there as well.

[Seashell Lover]

The way it looks to me he hit the cat and then the cat ran away.

[hlemommy]

I didn't see him hit the cat, it looked like the cat ran away before he got to close

[Sadie Louise]

Please let me get in one this conversation! I've been reading this from the beginning it's took me 3 days. Lol first off that stupid grin of stupidness bumb bob always has on hs smug face. He's nothing but a uneducated hillbilly with money! And Michelle needs to talk like a grown up instead of a baby! No one is calm all the time unless they are drugged! That family is like a bunch of robots. I can't wait until someone writes the tell all book. Hope it's one of the girls! And the clothing is beyond real. I remember growing up in a penecostal family and having to wear those long unflattering dresses and no pants no arm showing. And when I got out of there you bet your butt my wardrobe changed. That can't be their choice it's their over controlling fathers choice. He's creepy beyond my imagination. Wouldn't be surprised at any thing that comes out. And the oldest boy acts just like him. A bunch of weird control freaks. And I noticed how the hair looks too. Mechelles hair is horrendous. Looks like a coal miners daughter wanna be! Get rid of the hair get into the time machine with the rest of America! They have money and opportunity for their children but hold the strings on even what they say. Like a bunch of robots. No girl wants their daddy to pick their husband. And I sure wouldn't Marry one of those boys if I was a young girl. They are all carbon copys of dumb bob! And poor Ben must of really been in love to of put up with cleaning other people's crappy bathrooms so he could Marty one of the girls. Hope he rebels! Ok I'm done for the moment! Breath in breath out! Lol

[BatmanBeatles]

I did notice in the 14K episode Michelle's hair was much longer but more mullet style back then.  It looks better now but not by much!

All of their hair just look less crispy. Not much else.

[BitterApple]

He didn't hit the cat but they were deliberately aiming for it. You could clearly hear one of the kids in the background yelling "pow!" Assholes.

[Sadie Louise]

What's the defrauding stuff mean? And saying Nike if you are getting ready to see What? A leg? A low cut shirt? I think they are a bunch of hypocrites! And humping your wife at a put put golf course in front if your grown daughter and her courting partner? That's nasty! He's nasty and perverted. But he chooses their men for them? Wonder where he picks them from?

[Wellfleet]

What annoys me is the Duggar women telling the People stylists "no haircuts" when that's the one damn thing they all could use the most. Here you have professional people that do magazine shoots and you don't take advantage of it and at least get a good trim?

 

No kidding, I was thinking this too. These people really are their own worst enemies, aren't they? Who among us would not jump at the chance to have a professional makeover? I completely understand setting some boundaries or stipulations - in my own case I don't think I'd like my hair dyed for example. But I would definitely pay attention to any advice and tips I was getting from the pros. It's called learning - and improving things - and changing, Duggars. And paying attention to people who just might know something that you don't know. If the whole world thought like the Duggars, we'd still be living like cavemen. Or worse.

[Cherrio]

Wasn't it derrick who almost ran over the cat not ben?

Yes, I was wrong.    But I do remember them smiling and laughing.

[JoanArc]

Wasn't it derrick who almost ran over the cat not ben?

Bin was the one pushing the sled Derrick rode.

[Skittl1321]

What's the defrauding stuff mean? And saying Nike if you are getting ready to see What? A leg? A low cut shirt?

Only men are defrauded by the physical- women are emotional.

You can be defrauded by anything that might turn you on.  So skin.  Like schools that won't let girls wear spaghetti straps because shoulders might distract a boy.  Or thighs, midriffs, cleavage, anything tight fitting etc.

[JenCarroll]

Yes, I was wrong. But I do remember them smiling and laughing.

I think Ben was the one who pushed the "sled" and Derick was the one on it. They're both idiots.

ETA Sorry, Joanarc, we were posting simultaneously. :-)

___________________________________________

Hi, Sadie Louise! Welcome to the snark-fest. :-)

Edited May 1, 2015 by JenCarroll

[Cherrio]

I think Ben was the one who pushed the "sled" and Derick was the one on it. They're both idiots.

ETA Sorry, Joanarc, we were posting simultaneously. :-)

I get really upset when an animal is abused or hurt intentionally.   A decent human being would never do it.    

        I really hope they both get hit by a big truck on purpose so they can see if they like it.      It is a terrible thing to say, but these people are hideous

[SoSueMe]

Wasn't it derrick who almost ran over the cat not ben?

They were both in on it. This video shows more of the possible contact between cookie sheet sledding (yeehaw!!!) Derrick and the poor kitty.

 

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2iob1b

[truthtalk2014]

I hope any fool who actually bought a gift bought it used and saved the difference.

 

eta:   I posted this before reading all the other comments, so I give credit to everyone who posted first :)

 

and.....I think it might be a great idea that for the next wedding all of us here send used gifts.  A wonderful old cooking pot with dinner remnants still in it.   A used hair brush.

LOL-  Thank you for giving me a great laugh!  Great idea!

 

I really want to send Boob some used undies for his birthday- since he makes is clear that he takes so many on trips.  

[AmyFarrahFowler]

That's a side I haven't seen. I can see why he was picked to marry Jilly Muffin, he fits right in.

[Sadie Louise]

I didn't see the cat thing, I'm a animal lover period and agree with you all on here. How is that Christian? I'm not a fan of the duggettes I have a couple of sisters that think they are wonderful. I have watched it and see nothing spectacular about them. I was raised in my young years that women had to wear nothing but dresses and not cut your har. I hated it and I'm a christen but do not live like that. I wear jeans shorts and a bathing suit. The bathing wear of the duggettes is stupid. They dont know the damage they are doing to their children especially the girls. I think dumb bob and mechelle are beyond rediculas. Double standards! And t hump on your wife in public like a dog in heat is soooo wrong. I can't believe TLC put it on the air. But then again they see behind the scenes and know what's really going on. Maybe it will end up being a disgruntled TLC employee that writes the tell all book? Can't wait because it's going to happen. And I think the one boy has gay tendencies too. Maybe he'll come out of the prayer closet? That would put some starch in this dull show. I hate the way mechelle oes the speaking in the beginning of the show like she's so important and better than everyone because she gave birth to them all! Screamers included. And her hair was lighter in her young pictures, don't tell me that at almost 50 she's not dying the hair(and hair pieces) and he need to stop the stupid outdated home perks. Reminds me of the waltons when olivia wanted the home perm and ended up looking like a sick poodle. Lol

Excuse me She needs to stop the home perms! Looks Stupid

[NikSac]

What's the defrauding stuff mean? And saying Nike if you are getting ready to see What? A leg? A low cut shirt?

 

Ironically, not shoes... I can't remember if it was JB or Michelle but one of them said feet aren't sexy, so apparently that's why they look at their Nikes. I guess that only works for the ones who wear shoes though. Apparently they have not heard of foot fetishes.

 

Separate note re: the cat, I remember someone posted pictures of the cat actually being hit by the sled (cookie sheet) before it jumped out of the way. Maybe they figured it'd move and not be severely injured, but they definitely intended to hit it.

[DangerousMinds]

I guess men can't be defrauded by a pretty face full of makeup or long, flowing hair.

[becca3891]

DangerousMinds, well, apparently good old Bill was indeed defrauded by the pretty faces and long, flowing hair he mandated, since he "couldn't" control his impulses to be a creepy old man. It honestly makes me shudder when I think of those poor girls who felt entirely helpless as he played footsie with them, among other awful things. And in their world, the fault is always on the women, so I'm sure he tells himself and others that they were being temptresses. For all his obsessiveness about purity, it would be a hell of a lot less creepy if he dealt with celibacy in the normal way that he would consider so sinful.

[becca3891]

 

I'm thinking "lesbian Duggar fans" is pretty much a contradiction in terms. ;-)

Ha, well, I think a lot of people watch the show for its train wreck appeal. I'm not lesbian but I'm as liberal as they come and the Duggars make me furious, yet I can't stop. So I'm sure they have lesbian fans. But someone had a good point; they don't actually believe women can be defrauded physically, only emotionally. I don't know how many times they've said that romance novels are to women what pornography is to men. What?? I will acknowledge that there is biology to back up the idea that the male sex drive is (in general) stronger because of increased testosterone and the primitive instinct to procreate, but you know, men do have emotions too and women have sex drives.

 

Hey, I'm a woman and I watch porn too! Romance novels are boring. And I am most definitely affected when I see an attractive male body. But no matter what, it bothers me to no end that they somehow believe their standards are the be all to end all. If you surveyed 100 men I guarantee you most of them would say they find their apparel, their skirts and increasingly tight shirts, pleasing to the eye. If they really wanted to hide their bodies they could do a much better job. NOT that I think it is women's responsibility to control men's thoughts. It's a losing battle to try to combat our attractions and it's so much better to accept that and live life rather than the constant obsession with modesty.

[Sunnybobs]

I think it was Michelle who said that feet weren't sexy and laughed at the idea of it being an issue. I think that as they've moved further and further from their praire dress total cover up clothing and become more and more mainstream in their skirts and tops that their rhetoric has gone the other way and is over emphasising how modest they are - it's as if they're trying to convince themselves and the viewers that they're still the same even when they've blatantly moved the goalposts.

[Sadie Louise]

My opinion of the dress thing is that the girls would look much better in sweats than those ugly skirts. The tops have gotten better but the skirts still need much help! Would love to see Jana rebel and move out go to college and be a real young women. Start a good show about being good but still having fun and dressing better. Mechelle and dumb bob are never going to change. They are making money off exploiting their lifestyle. There's nothing wring with good values and modesty but dumb bob has none of these. I still see him humping baby voice on the putt putt golf episode. Nasty!

[MJDai]

What really gets on my nerves about the Duggars is the parentification of the children and the infantalisation of the adults. Pre-teens can raise their siblings and take care of their parents (cleaning their room for instance) but adults aren't trusted to go out alone, talk to people of the opposite sex unsupervised or even walk with their heads up if there is an uncovered knee in their general area.

The Duggar brood seems likely to suffer from a lot of identity issues. Some of the adult children seem stuck in Teen-mode (Jill, JD), others seem to just have no idea how to form an identity (Jana) and others' developmentally normal distance taking from their parents (+biology) has left them married very young (Jessa, Josh).

I honestly believe Dim Bulb and MEchelle are trying their best, but they've got such blinders on! For all their controlling they can't seem to see the harm they do to the development of their children. I guess when the goal of childrearing is to create soldiers for God's army instead of healthy, well adjusted adults, this is what you get.

[msblossom]

Eh, I don't think there's anything wrong with wearing skirts, but the long denim and frumpy looking ones worn by Michelle, Anna & some of the others are pretty fugly. In general, I'm a fan of skirts and dresses in addition to yoga pants and jeans.

I'd rather see them wear yoga pants if they're working out, cleaning, or doing household projects or childcare when it's impractical to wear a skirt. Although, I doubt we'll see a Duggar wearing any kind of pants for years to come unless they're wearing a goofy skirt over the top of them when they're playing sports or working out. It doesn't bother me that their skirts are getting shorter or more fitted -- I guess it's their way of modernizing an old fashioned fundie look and pushing the envelope. Are they being hypocritical? Well, yeah -- but they're hypocritical about a lot of their silly ticky-tack rules. They're all about keeping rules. This is the very thing that ticked Jesus off about the Pharisees. They had all these stupid rules that they were so proud of making, keeping and showing off. Jesus hated their hypocrisy and called them whitewashed tombs in Matthew:

Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean. In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness.

And in I Samuel it says that Man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart.

Edited May 2, 2015 by msblossom

[BitterApple]

I live in the desert so I tend to favor skirts and dresses, especially in the brutal summer months, but those frumpy floor sweepers the Duggars wear look terrible. I remember watching an Oprah special about Hasidic women in NYC and they all looked gorgeous and fashion forward while still maintaining their modesty standards. The J'slaves need to stop modeling their taste after their stuck-in-the-80's mmother.

[Cherrio]

Eh, I don't think there's anything wrong with wearing skirts, but the long denim and frumpy looking ones worn by Michelle, Anna & some of the others are pretty fugly. In general, I'm a fan of skirts and dresses in addition to yoga pants and jeans.

I'd rather see them wear yoga pants if they're working out, cleaning, or doing household projects or childcare when it's impractical to wear a skirt. Although, I doubt we'll see a Duggar wearing any kind of pants for years to come unless they're wearing a goofy skirt over the top of them when they're playing sports or working out. It doesn't bother me that their skirts are getting shorter or more fitted -- I guess it's their way of modernizing an old fashioned fundie look and pushing the envelope. Are they being hypocritical? Well, yeah -- but they're hypocritical about a lot of their silly ticky-tack rules. They're all about keeping rules. This is the very thing that ticked Jesus off about the Pharisees. They had all these stupid rules that they were so proud of making, keeping and showing off. Jesus hated their hypocrisy and called them whitewashed tombs in Matthew:

Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean. In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness.

And in I Samuel it says that Man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart.

I can only think of one good thing about this fundie lifestyle.   No chance of camel toe.

[Sadie Louise]

I wonder just how cute the girls would actually be with updated hair styles and jeans and tee shirts ot cute tank tops? One of course not two or three together. I bet they'd be a couple of knockouts in the bunch! Of course if the married ones have baby's every year like baby voice they wont look good for long. And I think little bens more worldly than they think. Bet he ain't all that pure. Which is ok. I keep seeing his face when he was told to scrub hat nasty bathroom.bet he wouldn't of done it if fame and one of the Duggettes wasnt going to be his prize in the end. Lol

[Happyfatchick]

What really gets on my nerves about the Duggars is the parentification of the children and the infantalisation of the adults.

That is so profound, and so on point.  I went back and read that sentence about 15 times.  This.  THIS IS THE THING!

 

Also, on another thread, GEML used the fetishistic society (I think she followed that with society).   I have to excuse myself, my brain is full.

[Wellfleet]

What really gets on my nerves about the Duggars is the parentification of the children and the infantalisation of the adults. Pre-teens can raise their siblings and take care of their parents (cleaning their room for instance) but adults aren't trusted to go out alone, talk to people of the opposite sex unsupervised or even walk with their heads up if there is an uncovered knee in their general area.

The Duggar brood seems likely to suffer from a lot of identity issues. Some of the adult children seem stuck in Teen-mode (Jill, JD), others seem to just have no idea how to form an identity (Jana) and others' developmentally normal distance taking from their parents (+biology) has left them married very young (Jessa, Josh).

I honestly believe Dim Bulb and MEchelle are trying their best, but they've got such blinders on! For all their controlling they can't seem to see the harm they do to the development of their children. I guess when the goal of childrearing is to create soldiers for God's army instead of healthy, well adjusted adults, this is what you get.

 

Good points. While I don't believe it's deliberate, the Gothard lifestyle - for lack of a better word - absolutely does burden children with adult responsibilities. At the same time the whole accountability-so-one-remains-a-virgin-until-marriage business treats adults, who are supposedly mature enough for a lifetime committment to another person, like five-year olds who can't be trusted to stay away from a plate of cookies while Mommy goes to answer the front door. Among Gothard followers, it seems pretty evident that only the older Duggar girls have been "stuck" raising their younger siblings, and of course this is completely due to Me-chelle. I haven't seen much of other "Gothard" mothers but from what I have seen, none of them are handing off six-month olds to their older sisters for all their daily care. It's my opinion that Me-chelle took what was initially supposed to be some temporary help - and manipulated it right and left, until she now has virtually no real responsibilities in raising her own children or running that house. Whatsoever. She may be the family "scheduler" but let's face it, anyone with a phone and computer could handle that. I believe if Me-chelle was abducted by aliens tonight, Boob would be the only person who'd be "negatively-impacted." Oh and yes, the aliens. They'd have to listen to that voice...

Edited May 3, 2015 by Wellfleet

[Muffyn]

Being the family scheduler for 19 children would be a big deal if they actually did things as individuals; that is, if the kids went to age-appropriate schools (pre-school, kindergarten, elementary, middle and high school) and had after school activities.  It would be a lot to get everybody ready to go then to coordinate picking them up, getting them to soccer, little league, etc.  However, when they are barely home schooled and then just hang around, there is not much to schedule.  Mechelle would fall apart if she had to take on the responsibilities of a typical mother of two.  

Edited May 5, 2015 by Muffyn

[riverblue22]

There is plenty to schedule.  All those visits and family performances!  And it could be Michelle promotes the family with some homespun marketing.  I can imagine her offering up their services to churches if the calendar is rather empty.  And somebody has to be in constant contact with People, GMA, etc.

[Sadie Louise]

Ok, so the Duggnutts have been on all day today on TLC so I've seen stuff I've never seen since I'm not into watching this show because they drive me crazy! But I just seen Jessa and Bengermans wedding. First off if the preacher couldn't pronounce my name correctly he wouldn't be marrying me. The bride was very pretty except her dress didn't fit well. The groom looked dorky! The groomsmen looked like poorly dressed hillbillies! And the reception? What? They have money, stop being CHEAP! I seen Ben flinch when he was called bengerman. I actually felt sorry for him. And children hollering KISS KISS KISS! No respect! Ice cream? Really? Like a bunch of silly kids! Ok I'm done.....

Poor jessa and Ben didn't even know how to kiss, they looked so childish in the kissing poses. .... And a nineteen year old can afford a trip to euroup? Wow but guess they make they big bucks on TLC.

[OhioMom]

Probably what bothers me the most is....the way the Duggar wives look so adoringly at their mates as they talk...like hero worship.  Well, Michelle's soft, calm voice bothers me.  And her laugh.  She needs to have her vocal cords  examined.  I bet they're full of nodules, or something.  Jim Bob....the way he actually has come to "expect" this hero worship from his wife.  The snarkiness of Jessa and Jill.  It's probably there in others, as well.  Ben's constantly plugged up nose.  The dorm rooms the kids have to sleep in.  The hair.  There are probably animals in there that no one knows about. The sickeningly sweet voice Michelle has. Oh...mentioned that already. I guess I'm done; I've gone full circle.  (Does this woman never lose her temper??? I don't believe it.)

[OhioMom]

I live in the desert so I tend to favor skirts and dresses, especially in the brutal summer months, but those frumpy floor sweepers the Duggars wear look terrible. I remember watching an Oprah special about Hasidic women in NYC and they all looked gorgeous and fashion forward while still maintaining their modesty standards. The J'slaves need to stop modeling their taste after their stuck-in-the-80's mmother.

I wonder if it's because they shop at the thrift store for their clothes? Maybe no one is donating "modern" clothes (that the Duggars feel they can wear), only old, outdated clothes.  I wonder if the married daughters shop at regular stores now for clothes (like Walmart, for Jill) ?? 

Edited May 5, 2015 by OhioMom

[Wellfleet]

Probably what bothers me the most is....the way the Duggar wives look so adoringly at their mates as they talk...like hero worship.  Well, Michelle's soft, calm voice bothers me.  And her laugh.  She needs to have her vocal cords  examined.  I bet they're full of nodules, or something.  Jim Bob....the way he actually has come to "expect" this hero worship from his wife.  The snarkiness of Jessa and Jill.  It's probably there in others, as well.  Ben's constantly plugged up nose.  The dorm rooms the kids have to sleep in.  The hair.  There are probably animals in there that no one knows about. The sickeningly sweet voice Michelle has. Oh...mentioned that already. I guess I'm done; I've gone full circle.  (Does this woman never lose her temper??? I don't believe it.)

 

Re your last question - Does this woman never lose her temper?  Well, there are a fair number of us who believe she is very well-medicated to avoid that entirely [wink].

[JoanArc]

Re your last question - Does this woman never lose her temper?  Well, there are a fair number of us who believe she is very well-medicated to avoid that entirely [wink].

I think someone with volcanic rage who always uses a baby voice is downright scary.

[becca3891]

I know she made a vow to the Lord or whatever that she would stop raising her voice, but admitted she used to many years ago, before her famous laundry room breakdown. But yes, a soft voice can be menacing too. Remember that episode from many years ago now when a howler was misbehaving and Michelle whispered something in his ear, and he shut right up. I think she was threatening physical punishment, and it's the exact same thing my mom used to do when we were in public and she couldn't get away with anything. Totally different from those outwardly trashy moms who yell in the grocery store, "Quit it or I'll beat your butt," but no less threatening.

 

And a 19-year-old affording a trip to Europe? Ha. You're right that thanks to TLC, he now has plenty of money, but don't think for a minute that they had to shell out one penny for their trip. Anytime they are filmed traveling, it's all paid for. Must be nice.

[OhioMom]

I know she made a vow to the Lord or whatever that she would stop raising her voice, but admitted she used to many years ago, before her famous laundry room breakdown. But yes, a soft voice can be menacing too. Remember that episode from many years ago now when a howler was misbehaving and Michelle whispered something in his ear, and he shut right up. I think she was threatening physical punishment, and it's the exact same thing my mom used to do when we were in public and she couldn't get away with anything. Totally different from those outwardly trashy moms who yell in the grocery store, "Quit it or I'll beat your butt," but no less threatening.

 

And a 19-year-old affording a trip to Europe? Ha. You're right that thanks to TLC, he now has plenty of money, but don't think for a minute that they had to shell out one penny for their trip. Anytime they are filmed traveling, it's all paid for. Must be nice.

When did the laundry room breakdown happen?? 

[andromeda331]

Remember that episode from many years ago now when a howler was misbehaving and Michelle whispered something in his ear, and he shut right up.

 

I remember that one too. It still freaks me out.

[lottiedottie]

I remember that one too. It still freaks me out.

I'd love to see a clip of that!

[Portia]

This is kind of arbitrary, but it drives me absolutely nuts that MEchelle always says "grandbabies" instead of "grandchildren."

[andromeda331]

I'd love to see a clip of that!

 

Hopefully this link works its around the 3:31 mark

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DllCz55LoEo&index=2&list=PL344078CAAB9E6E17

[becca3891]

We never got to see the laundry room breakdown but I believe it's talked about in one of their books, and somewhere else too. J'Chelle was overwhelmed with too many young kids before they were old enough to be sister moms, and apparently lost it. A friend then volunteered to do all their laundry.

[lookeyloo]

This is kind of arbitrary, but it drives me absolutely nuts that MEchelle always says "grandbabies" instead of "grandchildren."

I can tell you it is very, very common here in the south.  I grew up in NJ and have lived in Louisiana for 40 plus years and "grandbabies" vs. "grandchildren" is very much the norm down here.