Jesus God, Leah!!

[ghoulina]

15 hours ago, druzy said:

Ali struggles to regain her balance. She is on the left and she does a somersault. 

This bothers me. I think it might be a cool idea for kids with mental disabilities. But kids that have physical disabilities should not be made to feel like they have to conform to the rest of the world. Some things are just never going to be okay for them to do. And that's okay. They should be loved and supported for what they CAN do. And there is PLENTY Ali can do. But this is not one of them. 

I don't know....maybe my opinion is biased because I have some strong feelings about this competitive cheerleading stuff in the first place. But it just bothered me to see these girls who can hardly walk trying to so hard to fit in with their peers, when it's okay to be perfectly different. 

[ReadMeLattice]

5 hours ago, ghoulina said:

This bothers me. I think it might be a cool idea for kids with mental disabilities. But kids that have physical disabilities should not be made to feel like they have to conform to the rest of the world. Some things are just never going to be okay for them to do. And that's okay. They should be loved and supported for what they CAN do. And there is PLENTY Ali can do. But this is not one of them. 

I don't know....maybe my opinion is biased because I have some strong feelings about this competitive cheerleading stuff in the first place. But it just bothered me to see these girls who can hardly walk trying to so hard to fit in with their peers, when it's okay to be perfectly different. 

I agree! There are literally tons of things that they/anyone can do that don't require physical acumen. In fact I would say MOST school activities don't require it--literally only sports, cheerleading and dance do. They are just obsessed with her being some kind of a cheerleader no matter what, I don't know if it's to prove Dr. Tsao, the top specialist for this particular issue in the nation, wrong, or if it's because in their area it's a social MUST to be a cheerleader (like being in a sorority...?), or because Leah/possibly Corey have some obsession with popularity and cheerleading, but it is truly sickening. And ignorant.

And even though I hate Leah the most, I have to say that all of them (grandparents on both sides included) are equally responsible for this. Corey should stop it. Miranda should say something, though it's perhaps not her place. Papa Jeff and Mama Dawn should try to stop it. But they are all. ignorant.

Edited March 29, 2018 by Lm2162

[ReadMeLattice]

I think we all just see that she is "better" than the rest and can't understand why she keeps exposing them. I don't think anyone is talking about the pictures, just the trashy show. 

There's no need to ask why Jenelle, for example, is exposing her children. Or Kail. Like...there's no need to have that convo, they're way too far gone. And usually someone in their camp is pregnant or arrested, so it's not as interesting. Whereas if I WASN'T getting a new baby daddy or put in jail every weekend, I'd be running far away from this show by now. It's more the contrast that baffles me.

Also, just speaking for me--usually the thread takes a turn in response to people making a criticism of something about Chelsea, usually fairly trivial because her life is normal, and then others saying we "shouldn't judge her" because she's a good parent, etc. And then other people say back, "we can judge her because she's still on TV." And round and round it goes. We all play a part and everybody has a fair point, I think at least. A lot of the threads do have their recurrent themes and recurring mini-debates.

Which isn't hard, because they all tend to do the same thing like 800 times in a row and never change.

Edited March 29, 2018 by Lm2162

[Christina87]

I teach middle school, and there are sooooo many meaningful activities we have that don't include physical activity!!!! Chorus. Theatre. Band. Art. Home ec activities, like sewing and cooking (assuming that someone else gets the pans off the high shelves, etc). Debate. Being an office helper. Academic teams. Then there are lots of fun activities that she could do on her own, like writing. They could get her some creative writing classes, and then everyone could read what she wrote and celebrate it. Her art could be on the walls. Her accomplishments could be just as big as Gracie's, but just different!

And what if Addy decides she doesn't want to be a cheerleader? She is able bodied, but may not be interested in it. I wonder what Leah would do! Maybe if spunky Addy said no, it would give Ali an easier out. 

[lilmarysunshine]

8 hours ago, ghoulina said:

This bothers me. I think it might be a cool idea for kids with mental disabilities. But kids that have physical disabilities should not be made to feel like they have to conform to the rest of the world. Some things are just never going to be okay for them to do. And that's okay. They should be loved and supported for what they CAN do. And there is PLENTY Ali can do. But this is not one of them. 

I don't know....maybe my opinion is biased because I have some strong feelings about this competitive cheerleading stuff in the first place. But it just bothered me to see these girls who can hardly walk trying to so hard to fit in with their peers, when it's okay to be perfectly different. 

This is crazy to me.

My kids are not athletic (nor interested) and I had to just get over it because I was better than average but certainly no star. But I really enjoyed sports.  My two kids are good musicians, though, and that's something I'm not at all so I sure appreciate their talent.

Why does Ali feel like she needs to do this?  Is this all young girls in WV can do?! (And it is not a "Southern" thing as I live in the South and never even considered cheerleading. Not that I have anything against it. Just it certainly wasn't my shy child's "thing.")

[ReadMeLattice]

30 minutes ago, lilmarysunshine said:

 

Why does Ali feel like she needs to do this?  Is this all young girls in WV can do?! (And it is not a "Southern" thing as I live in the South and never even considered cheerleading. Not that I have anything against it. Just it certainly wasn't my shy child's "thing.")

I would assume it's very, very pushed on her by her family, both to push some weird sexist image of the popular cheerleader (still can't believe that's a thing anymore) and to 'prove' that she's able-bodied despite what doctors have said time and time and time again.

I only mentioned the south because my family members in east Texas WORSHIP cheerleaders. It is #1 in their book and basically required. Obviously that's #notallsoutherners, but I never encountered anything akin to it on the East or West coasts or in the Midwest, either.

Edited March 29, 2018 by Lm2162

[lilmarysunshine]

12 minutes ago, Lm2162 said:

I would assume it's very, very pushed on her by her family, both to push some weird sexist image of the popular cheerleader (still can't believe that's a thing anymore) and to 'prove' that she's able-bodied despite what doctors have said time and time and time again.

I only mentioned the south because my family members in east Texas WORSHIP cheerleaders. It is #1 in their book and basically required. Obviously that's #notallsoutherners, but I never encountered anything akin to it on the East or West coasts or in the Midwest, either.

I have friends in the southwest, northwest and east coast who all have daughters heavily involved in cheerleading.  Not saying it is not big in the South but I think it is all over.

I do think some of it is to prove the doctor wrong - like nobody is going to put limits on Ali Girl!  But that's crazy. It's not some moral failing or lack of heart to have MD.

[ReadMeLattice]

7 hours ago, lilmarysunshine said:

I have friends in the southwest, northwest and east coast who all have daughters heavily involved in cheerleading.  Not saying it is not big in the South but I think it is all over.

I do think some of it is to prove the doctor wrong - like nobody is going to put limits on Ali Girl!  But that's crazy. It's not some moral failing or lack of heart to have MD.

Unfortunately a lot of people still see it that way. 

& Leah & Corey aren't exactly...shall we say, geniuses? 

[Mkay]

North East Texas girl here.  Wanted to be a cheerleader, didn’t make the team, couldn’t have afforded it anyway.  I joined the band. I excelled at the Clairnet.  We were a military marching band.  I miss my band yrs. Now my daughter is in her first yr of band. She was not at all interested in cheerleading.  She is loving band. I’m excited about that. :)

[Tatum]

12 hours ago, Lm2162 said:

I would assume it's very, very pushed on her by her family, both to push some weird sexist image of the popular cheerleader (still can't believe that's a thing anymore) and to 'prove' that she's able-bodied despite what doctors have said time and time and time again.

I only mentioned the south because my family members in east Texas WORSHIP cheerleaders. It is #1 in their book and basically required. Obviously that's #notallsoutherners, but I never encountered anything akin to it on the East or West coasts or in the Midwest, either.

I don't even think proving medical science wrong even enters Leah's mind. I think for her, not being able to be a cheerleader is just like the worst fate ever. Leah probably can't even fathom the possibility that someone wouldn't want to cheer, and if Ali straight up told her, cheerleading sucks, Leah would likely assume this was just sour grapes. Leah probably considers the special cheerleading team a godsend, so at least Ali can simulate a cheerleading experience. And Ali probably is at the age where she knows Leah will be disappointed if she's not into it, so she goes along with it to make her mother happy. Knowing Leah, she probably asks Ali dozens of times, isn't it SO great you can have your own cheerleading team?

[ReadMeLattice]

1 hour ago, Tatum said:

I don't even think proving medical science wrong even enters Leah's mind. I think for her, not being able to be a cheerleader is just like the worst fate ever. Leah probably can't even fathom the possibility that someone wouldn't want to cheer, and if Ali straight up told her, cheerleading sucks, Leah would likely assume this was just sour grapes. Leah probably considers the special cheerleading team a godsend, so at least Ali can simulate a cheerleading experience. And Ali probably is at the age where she knows Leah will be disappointed if she's not into it, so she goes along with it to make her mother happy. Knowing Leah, she probably asks Ali dozens of times, isn't it SO great you can have your own cheerleading team?

That's probably true. I do think it enters Corey's mind to some degree. He and Papa Jeff (that's his name, right?) have always had a bit of that "Jesus will send a miracle, let's prove them all wrong" mentality...Leah has always seemed to believe the doctors to an extent, but to be too lazy to implement the rules.

Can't figure out which mentality is worse.

[Tatum]

5 minutes ago, Lm2162 said:

That's probably true. I do think it enters Corey's mind to some degree. He and Papa Jeff (that's his name, right?) have always had a bit of that "Jesus will send a miracle, let's prove them all wrong" mentality...Leah has always seemed to believe the doctors to an extent, but to be too lazy to implement the rules.

Can't figure out which mentality is worse.

You know, you talked about this several months (years?) ago, when you were saying how people that use wheelchairs don't see themselves as being confined and it's merely another mode of transportation (albeit one with logistical issues at times). That is what Leah cannot grasp- it's that this wheelchair use is not this horrific thing that must be deferred as long as possible. If she would just get over that mental hurdle that encouraging wheelchair usage is akin to cutting off a kid's legs, I think she'd be a lot more willing to embrace the doctor's advice.

 

Corey and his family are just stupid/in denial to the point of negligence.

[ReadMeLattice]

2 minutes ago, Tatum said:

You know, you talked about this several months (years?) ago, when you were saying how people that use wheelchairs don't see themselves as being confined and it's merely another mode of transportation (albeit one with logistical issues at times). That is what Leah cannot grasp- it's that this wheelchair use is not this horrific thing that must be deferred as long as possible. If she would just get over that mental hurdle that encouraging wheelchair usage is akin to cutting off a kid's legs, I think she'd be a lot more willing to embrace the doctor's advice.

 

Corey and his family are just stupid/in denial to the point of negligence.

Yeah, I think most people don't realize that most folks actually consider their wheelchairs *liberating* or at least neutral. Not to say their disabilities themselves are, I'm sure they would prefer to walk/not have pain/etc., but the actual wheelchair isn't some sign of resignation and imprisonment, it's usually an antidote to a life of pain and not being able to get around in the world and participate fully in life. 

Someone in a writing group with me wrote an excellent piece about this after Stephen Hawking's death. https://www.wsj.com/articles/stephen-hawking-is-dead-not-free-1521584940?mod=e2tw

Though, of course...I'm pretty sure Leah or Corey would have to read at all to learn about this stuff.................(p.s. do you think they've even heard of Stephen Hawking?) 

[Tatum]

8 minutes ago, Lm2162 said:

Yeah, I think most people don't realize that most folks actually consider their wheelchairs *liberating* or at least neutral. Not to say their disabilities themselves are, I'm sure they would prefer to walk/not have pain/etc., but the actual wheelchair isn't some sign of resignation and imprisonment, it's usually an antidote to a life of pain and not being able to get around in the world and participate fully in life. 

Someone in a writing group with me wrote an excellent piece about this after Stephen Hawking's death. https://www.wsj.com/articles/stephen-hawking-is-dead-not-free-1521584940?mod=e2tw

Though, of course...I'm pretty sure Leah or Corey would have to read at all to learn about this stuff.................(p.s. do you think they've even heard of Stephen Hawking?) 

If they did, it's only because someone had to explain to them the scene in Knocked Up when Seth Rogan's friends are play fighting in wheelchairs at the hospital.

 

(Or maybe that's just how Stephen Hawking was brought to MY attention in 2007. Hangs head in shame).

 

ETA: as long as I'm going on record as being super vapid, I'll share another anecdote. Whenever there is a major sports or political related upset (as in, someone -or a sports team- loses who was expected to not only win, but win by a landslide) there's always a 'Dewey defeats Truman" joke thrown in there, and it goes over the heads of all my friends. I explain the reference, and all my friends think I'm super smart. The fact is though, I only know about that because the author used that joke in a Sweet Valley Twins book that I read as a kid. So now you guys know something about me that my friends don't know :).

Edited March 29, 2018 by Tatum

[Bridget]

When I see Ali falling down all of the time, knee pads or not, all I can think about is that she's going to be 100% totally dependent on her pretty pink wheelchair so much sooner than later because of possible serious knee damage sustained because she has morons for parents.Or, she is going to get a concussion because she either fell & hit her head or someone might accidentally injure her during a game or competition. 

It kills me to think that she possibly won't be able to even walk to the bathroom in her house because of potential knee damage that further restricts her mobility when she should have been in her wheelchair from the start. 

Ali needs a 1:1 aide at school!! Why in the hell do her parents think sports are easier for her than eating lunch by herself?

I don't doubt it takes her longer to eat her lunch than her peers, but that's not why Ali has an aide. NO school district would approve the hiring of a 1:1 for a student with an IEP who eats slowly. Students who eat slowly as a result of their LD (learning disability) also have physical limits that also impede their ability to succeed independently in the classroom. Most students with physical limits like Ali struggle to do things like pull out their HW on time to turn it in or anything else with a time limit. I would love to know what her day at school looks like.

 

I hate to think what it will take for her parents to realize that Dr. Tsao knows what he's talking about!

[ReadMeLattice]

8 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

I think what also bothers me is that it's like Ali has to cheer because Gracie does. I have kids close in age, so I get it. But is that Leah WISHES Ali was more like Gracie? Or is she too lazy to drive to different activities for all the kids? Both? I'd just like to see Ali treated as more of an individual. 

Probably both. She also just has a really limited view of the world. Girls do this, boys do this, this is what's fun for kids, this is what we eat...

[ghoulina]

28 minutes ago, Lm2162 said:

Probably both. She also just has a really limited view of the world. Girls do this, boys do this, this is what's fun for kids, this is what we eat...

Yup. 

Wives cheat. Husbands wear camo shorts. Kids eat frosting from a can (but at the table). 

[Bridget]

40 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

I think what also bothers me is that it's like Ali has to cheer because Gracie does. I have kids close in age, so I get it. But is that Leah WISHES Ali was more like Gracie? Or is she too lazy to drive to different activities for all the kids? Both? I'd just like to see Ali treated as more of an individual. 

You made me think of another possibility that drives Leah to force Ali to be “normal”: the twin thing.

I’m a twin (I have a fraternal brother) and I grew up and went to school with about eight pairs of twins, some of whom were identical & same gender.

My mom was a member of a legit “Mother of Twins Club”, which was a real thing! Moms got together in person to have meetings, plan events and probably talk about stuff only they would understand.

All of the twins I knew, including myself, were never in the same class (for obvious reasons). They/we never had any overlapping hobbies, areas of interests or favorite subjects. The only thing they/we have in common is our date of birth. Some twins had the whole “identical” thing, but I was always able to tell them apart.

(For the record, it does suck having to share a birthday. The struggle is real!)

I still remember students walking up to my (twin) friends and before they even said hello, they’d ask them point blank: “Are you Kevin or Scott?” or “Are you Keith or Kyle?” The identical male twins were always harder for my peers to tell apart, or maybe the girls were just trying to flirt. Either way, not a good impression to make!

Twins are like everyone else: they are individual people. Period. End of story.

I think Leah is one of those moms who thinks her twins are conjoined twins instead of realizing they are separate people. 

She can’t dress them in matching outfits to make them “the same” anymore, so she’s grasping at straws. 

I seriously wonder if she knows they are fraternal twins!

As long as she pushes the obnoxious “twin angle” onto them, she will do some irreparable damage that will have those kids in therapy for a long time.

I have a former student graduating HS this year and he’s got an identical twin brother. Their entire identity is based on one thing: we are twins, so we must be super special. They even write about the same topic for every freakin essay “Being a twin is hard because everything costs twice as much for our parents.” Honest to God, that is their default story for every essay, paper and college application personal statement.

The boys were always in the same class in elementary school (Mom somehow overrode the administrative decision to separate the boys from K-5) and they just came back from a UC college tour, where they shared the same hotel room because their mom went bat shit crazy (at the informational parent meeting) at the idea of her 18 year old sons sleeping in separate hotel rooms. 

The boys only socialize with one another. They literally don’t have any other friends and it breaks my heart because that’s not how the real world works. None of the seniors can stand to be around them because they also have a self-imposed air of superiority about them, simply because they are twins. 

The twin who was my former student (Twin A) has a ton of potential and has a great sense of humor, but his brother (Twin B) is such an asshole at times, that Twin A doesn’t have an escape route. I can tell Twin A feels like he is permanently shackled to Twin B because TWINS.

College decisions are still up in the air for them, but I pray that they go to different schools. I can’t imagine how shitty their lives will be if they end up at the same school.

[Christina87]

6 hours ago, Bridget said:

You made me think of another possibility that drives Leah to force Ali to be “normal”: the twin thing.

I’m a twin (I have a fraternal brother) and I grew up and went to school with about eight pairs of twins, some of whom were identical & same gender.

My mom was a member of a legit “Mother of Twins Club”, which was a real thing! Moms got together in person to have meetings, plan events and probably talk about stuff only they would understand.

All of the twins I knew, including myself, were never in the same class (for obvious reasons). They/we never had any overlapping hobbies, areas of interests or favorite subjects. The only thing they/we have in common is our date of birth. Some twins had the whole “identical” thing, but I was always able to tell them apart.

(For the record, it does suck having to share a birthday. The struggle is real!)

I still remember students walking up to my (twin) friends and before they even said hello, they’d ask them point blank: “Are you Kevin or Scott?” or “Are you Keith or Kyle?” The identical male twins were always harder for my peers to tell apart, or maybe the girls were just trying to flirt. Either way, not a good impression to make!

Twins are like everyone else: they are individual people. Period. End of story.

I think Leah is one of those moms who thinks her twins are conjoined twins instead of realizing they are separate people. 

She can’t dress them in matching outfits to make them “the same” anymore, so she’s grasping at straws. 

I seriously wonder if she knows they are fraternal twins!

As long as she pushes the obnoxious “twin angle” onto them, she will do some irreparable damage that will have those kids in therapy for a long time.

I have a former student graduating HS this year and he’s got an identical twin brother. Their entire identity is based on one thing: we are twins, so we must be super special. They even write about the same topic for every freakin essay “Being a twin is hard because everything costs twice as much for our parents.” Honest to God, that is their default story for every essay, paper and college application personal statement.

The boys were always in the same class in elementary school (Mom somehow overrode the administrative decision to separate the boys from K-5) and they just came back from a UC college tour, where they shared the same hotel room because their mom went bat shit crazy (at the informational parent meeting) at the idea of her 18 year old sons sleeping in separate hotel rooms. 

The boys only socialize with one another. They literally don’t have any other friends and it breaks my heart because that’s not how the real world works. None of the seniors can stand to be around them because they also have a self-imposed air of superiority about them, simply because they are twins. 

The twin who was my former student (Twin A) has a ton of potential and has a great sense of humor, but his brother (Twin B) is such an asshole at times, that Twin A doesn’t have an escape route. I can tell Twin A feels like he is permanently shackled to Twin B because TWINS.

College decisions are still up in the air for them, but I pray that they go to different schools. I can’t imagine how shitty their lives will be if they end up at the same school.

I had acquaintances in college who were identical female twins, and they did EVERYTHING together!!! They were so codependent they would literally answer the phone, "this is mary and Jane" (obviously not their real names). Ummmm hello? It has to be one or the other! To whom am I speaking? They went home together every weekend, majored in the same thing, took all the same classes, etc. Now they are pushing 30, and neither one has had a boyfriend or even many friends. They live together, work at the same place and in the same room, and have completely the same lives. It's sad!

i think it's like others have said, that Leah can't conceive of anyone not wanting to be a cheerleader, while Corey wants to prove the doctor wrong. If we had a nickel for every time he said he saw more positives in Ali, we would be filthy rich!!! I'm glad he is being positive about what she CAN do, and wish he could keep that mindset while also not going against doctor's orders. 

[GreatKazu]

10 hours ago, Lm2162 said:

That's probably true. I do think it enters Corey's mind to some degree. He and Papa Jeff (that's his name, right?) have always had a bit of that "Jesus will send a miracle, let's prove them all wrong" mentality...Leah has always seemed to believe the doctors to an extent, but to be too lazy to implement the rules.

Can't figure out which mentality is worse.

Yes. Not THAT Jeff. lol 

[Bridget]

55 minutes ago, GreatKazu said:

Yes. Not THAT Jeff. lol 

I feel like I missed something - what other Jeff should I be snarking on? 

Thx! ? 

[monicageller]

[GreatKazu]

19 hours ago, Bridget said:

I feel like I missed something - what other Jeff should I be snarking on? 

Thx! ? 

Matt's friend Jeff. He was the one who Matt would point the finger at anytime Matt needed a scapegoat. When Matt was caught sexting, he blamed Jeff. Since then we have resorted to pointing out Jeff's name anytime blame needed to be put on someone. We usually post "I blame Jeff." 

On ‎3‎/‎27‎/‎2018 at 12:05 PM, FairyDusted said:

I'm all in for Prevert's Edition: Hawaii 

Topic...tons of other clubs and groups for Ali. Leah is going to look back and regret this. 

lol Preverts Edition. I love it!

[Mkay]

She’s looking a little..... what’s the word? I’m trying to be nice. 

 

 

[Christina87]

19 hours ago, Mkay said:

She’s looking a little..... what’s the word? I’m trying to be nice. 

 

 

Fake?

[Mkay]

The eyebrows and makeup is waaaay too heavy. She looks drunk or high. 

[GreatKazu]

21 hours ago, Mkay said:

She’s looking a little..... what’s the word? I’m trying to be nice. 

 

 

 

[Mkay]

1 hour ago, GreatKazu said:

 

Perfect!!

[lilmarysunshine]

23 hours ago, Mkay said:

She’s looking a little..... what’s the word? I’m trying to be nice.

Old?

[Fosca]

On 3/30/2018 at 11:07 PM, Mkay said:

She’s looking a little..... what’s the word? I’m trying to be nice. 

 

 

If she makes her eyes any bigger with those filters, she's going to look more like an alien than she already does.

[meredithalmighty]

Has anyone heard updates from Germy? It  looks like while David is off Teen Mom 2, Janelle is still filming. I believe that Germy wanted both of them off the show, so does that mean we won't see their kid next season?

[Zuleikha]

Is there any reason to believe Ali doesn't want to do cheer? She looked happy and proud of herself in the clip to me. She was spotted through the somersault, and I don't know if it was her spotter's screw up that the spotter didn't help Ali stand or if Ali wants to do as much as she can on her own. 

IMHO, there are many reasons to criticize Leah and Corey for how they handle Ali's medical treatment, but having her in a cheer squad that is explicitly about adapting to team member's specific needs is not one of them. Likewise the makeup and clothing was clearly picked by the cheer coach and not Leah.

[HeySandyStrange]

8 hours ago, Zuleikha said:

Is there any reason to believe Ali doesn't want to do cheer? She looked happy and proud of herself in the clip to me. She was spotted through the somersault, and I don't know if it was her spotter's screw up that the spotter didn't help Ali stand or if Ali wants to do as much as she can on her own. 

IMHO, there are many reasons to criticize Leah and Corey for how they handle Ali's medical treatment, but having her in a cheer squad that is explicitly about adapting to team member's specific needs is not one of them. Likewise the makeup and clothing was clearly picked by the cheer coach and not Leah.

I'm sure that Ali probably did want do cheer. The issue most of us have is, modified activity or not, her doctor has said that to much physical activity of any kind is only going to damage her body in the long run and weaken her before her time. And Dr.Tsao would know, he is one of the leading doctors in this country in his field. 

As for the makeup... yeah, it was probably picked by the cheer coach, but personally as a parent I would never let my kid  wear such heavy makeup at all of 7 years old. Sorry, it is cheap and tacky even for the Hollar. Leah could object to it or find a different squad for her kids, but apparently she thinks it's A-ok to tart her kids up like. Just more said commentary on life in the Hollar.

Edited April 3, 2018 by HeySandyStrange

[ghoulina]

13 hours ago, Zuleikha said:

Is there any reason to believe Ali doesn't want to do cheer? She looked happy and proud of herself in the clip to me. She was spotted through the somersault, and I don't know if it was her spotter's screw up that the spotter didn't help Ali stand or if Ali wants to do as much as she can on her own. 

IMHO, there are many reasons to criticize Leah and Corey for how they handle Ali's medical treatment, but having her in a cheer squad that is explicitly about adapting to team member's specific needs is not one of them. Likewise the makeup and clothing was clearly picked by the cheer coach and not Leah.

I don't know that this team IS adapting to her needs. Given that she has limited use of her muscles, straining them doesn't seem like a good idea. 

Ali does seem happy, but I think it's because this is all she knows. She is given such a narrow world view. I'd like to see them explore other options. Unfortunately, sometimes we have to chose doing the right thing over our child's happiness. I think some physical activity is okay, but I don't see how cheering is a good idea for her. 

[Mkay]

50 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

I don't know that this team IS adapting to her needs. Given that she has limited use of her muscles, straining them doesn't seem like a good idea. 

Ali does seem happy, but I think it's because this is all she knows. She is given such a narrow world view. I'd like to see them explore other options. Unfortunately, sometimes we have to chose doing the right thing over our child's happiness. I think some physical activity is okay, but I don't see how cheering is a good idea for her. 

Or Softball. 

[teapot]

56 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

I don't know that this team IS adapting to her needs. Given that she has limited use of her muscles, straining them doesn't seem like a good idea. 

Ali does seem happy, but I think it's because this is all she knows. She is given such a narrow world view. I'd like to see them explore other options. Unfortunately, sometimes we have to chose doing the right thing over our child's happiness. I think some physical activity is okay, but I don't see how cheering is a good idea for her. 

Unfortunately, I think that according to Ali's family, there's nothing better that you can be other than a pretty cheerleader.

Edited April 3, 2018 by teapot
no offense to cheerleaders, guys, you do you! But there's lots of good things to be

[Zuleikha]

The issue most of us have is, modified activity or not, her doctor has said that to much physical activity of any kind is only going to damage her body in the long run and weaken her before her time. And Dr.Tsao would know, he is one of the leading doctors in this country in his field.

The cheer squad has some kids who use wheelchairs, so the coach theoretically has the ability to adapt to all levels. It looked to me like none of what Ali was doing would strain her muscles except for, somewhat ironically, the standing. She was basically moved or carried through the other movements.

 Leah could object to it or find a different squad for her kids, but apparently she thinks it's A-ok to tart her kids up like.

She may not be able to find a different squad. I don't think there are other special needs squads. In the grand scheme of things, the makeup is for stage and not for every day. It's not my favorite thing in the world and I do think there are ways to do stage makeup that reads as more kid appropriate, but at the end of the day, it's also not that unusual for performing arts. Stage makeup on adults is often pretty--let's just say intense--as well.

[druzy]

4 hours ago, Zuleikha said:

The cheer squad has some kids who use wheelchairs, so the coach theoretically has the ability to adapt to all levels. It looked to me like none of what Ali was doing would strain her muscles except for, somewhat ironically, the standing. She was basically moved or carried through the other movements.

@Zuleikha I understand what you are saying but I wish that Ali was one of the kids who used her wheelchair. The children who were holding Ali up did the best they could but Ali has a very rare condition so the coach theortically does not have the ability to adapt to all levels.  Dr. Tso is one of the the top doctors in the world who specializes in Titin Muscular Dystrophy. He told Leah and Corey she needs to preserve her muscles. If the well intentioned children accidently moved the wrong way Ali would not recover like a child without her condition. 

Edited April 4, 2018 by druzy

[Mkay]

 

Edited April 5, 2018 by Mkay

[Tatum]

Ali can't see out of both eyes? I never knew that.

[Mkay]

Maybe softball really isn’t the best thing to have her in, for more reasons than one. 

[GleamingMist]

I didn't realize she couldn't see out of both eyes.  I lost my left eye in an accident as a child so I feel for her.  It's a hard thing as a child.  Even as an adult I constantly walk into the corners of tables, walls, etc because of lack of depth perception.  However, I was encouraged to do sports (especially sports involving balls) by my doctor to work with my hand eye coordination.  Softball would be good for her in terms of her eye, not so much for her legs.

[teapot]

1 hour ago, GleamingMist said:

I didn't realize she couldn't see out of both eyes.  I lost my left eye in an accident as a child so I feel for her.  It's a hard thing as a child.  Even as an adult I constantly walk into the corners of tables, walls, etc because of lack of depth perception.  However, I was encouraged to do sports (especially sports involving balls) by my doctor to work with my hand eye coordination.  Softball would be good for her in terms of her eye, not so much for her legs.

I was born legally blind in my right eye, and without great vision in my left.  The way that they described Ali's condition on TM2 a long time ago kind of sounded like the way they explained it to me...like the brain not getting the signal.  I remember wanting to reach out to Leah at the time but I never did.

I'm a complete klutz and I'm not great at sports so I applaud Ali's accomplishments, albeit w/mixed feelings due to her other limitations.  The only thing that affects me all that much is that I can't drive at night or on the highway.

to be honest I feel like I'm great when I'm just existing in my life, but when people start asking me a million questions, that's where I struggle with the explanations. (like if I sit here & give you eight million medical terms, is that even gonna mean anything to you?  what's the frickin' point?)

[JocelynCavanaugh]

If Leah weren’t so dumb I would think she’s actively trying to shorten Ali’s life and make it as miserable as possible. 

[FairyDusted]

And she's so proud to promote bitchface on her little girls. I'm back to not liking her actively again.

[MaddyMaeboxerbabe]

How old is Addy?  I am surprised that she is wearing large hoop earrings.  

[FairyDusted]

16 minutes ago, MaddyMaeboxerbabe said:

How old is Addy?  I am surprised that she is wearing large hoop earrings.  

I'm not. Wonder how Germ feels about that. 

[Scarlett45]

16 hours ago, JocelynCavanaugh said:

If Leah weren’t so dumb I would think she’s actively trying to shorten Ali’s life and make it as miserable as possible. 

Actually I wouldn’t be surprised if she was unconsciously trying to do that. Hanging out with my Sib Group members (most of us have siblings with cognitive disabilities but there are a few who’s siblings had/have severe physical disabilities like MD and spinal muscular atrophy) I hear all kinds of weird things about family dynamics in these type of situations. Leah may believe that a short life filled with “normal” activities is more fulfilling than a longer life “bound to a wheelchair”(damn that sounds like a bad porn movie- barf), also she may think making Ali do what’s best for her long term help is “punishing her” for not being “normal”......

 

Child, if anything hanging out with other Sibs has taught me is that people react 300 million ways to the exact same set of circumstances. 

Edited April 8, 2018 by Scarlett45

[GreatKazu]

On ‎4‎/‎6‎/‎2018 at 3:10 PM, LBS said:

I covet that leather jacket.

And it is a suitable size. Not ten sizes too small. See Kail!

[JocelynCavanaugh]

2 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Actually I wouldn’t be surprised if she was unconsciously trying to do that. Hanging out with my Sib Group members (most of us have siblings with cognitive disabilities but there are a few who’s siblings had/have severe physical disabilities like MD and spinal muscular atrophy) I hear all kinds of weird things about family dynamics in these type of situations. Leah may believe that a short life filled with “normal” activities is more fulfilling than a longer life “bound to a wheelchair”(damn that sounds like a bad porn movie- barf), also she may think making Ali do what’s best for her long term help is “punishing her” for not being “normal”......

 

Child, if anything hanging out with other Sibs has taught me is that people react 300 million ways to the exact same set of circumstances. 

Wow. I never thought of it that way but it makes sense. Thanks for this perspective! I wonder if, also on an unconscious level, Leah might prefer the prospect of being an aggrieved and fawned-over mother of a child who died young, rather than caring for an increasingly dependent adult child for decades. Not the most noble idea, but I guess understandable on some level.