S10.E19: Life Is a Cabaret

[OnceSane]

Quote

It's the night of Luann's cabaret show, "Countess and Friends"; during the performance, Luann gets heckled, and Sonja shows some skin; at the after party, Ramona has a burning question for Bethenny, while Dorinda has some parting words for Luann.

Airs August 15, 2018.

[KungFuBunny]

It’s 8:00 PM…woo hoo!

In honor of tonight’s season finale, I, KungFuBunny, will channel Dorinda Medley.

First, I would like to reiterate just how much love I have for Ex-Countess with a mugshot, Luann

[ShawnaLanne]

Lu's bolero looks old lady tacky chic to me.

Lu's mom and son are going. People aren't going to see Sonja, they are going to see Lu. God, Sonja.

[Straycat80]

This is the finale already. And it’s on an hour earlier. Get ready to see Sonja’s fake wardrobe malfunction. Hope she’s not wearing a diaper. 

[ShawnaLanne]

I wish once in my life I had a top tier makeup, hair, and stylist crew. It looks awesome.

[film noire]

My usual glee is tempered tonight -- ladies, please bring it home -- mwah mwah!

 

Edited August 16, 2018 by film noire

[KungFuBunny]

Holy Shit!

Last week, Priv got my Dorinda makeup exactly like tonight's finale.

Okay...why do I want to watch Law & Order now...and maybe take a nap?

[ShawnaLanne]

1 minute ago, KungFuBunny said:

Holy Shit!

Last week, Priv got my Dorinda makeup exactly like tonight's finale.

Okay...why do I want to watch Law & Order now...and maybe take a nap?

Blending can be your best friend. I like Tinsley's look. 

Ooh. Tin does not look happy with Carole in the preview shot at the show.

Carole: Everyone should know everything about everyone.

Tinsley, with gritted teeth: That's your new motto?

Edited August 16, 2018 by ShawnaLanne

[nexxie]

Ha! Loved Dorinda’s bottle-opening lesson.

[scoobie1]

Stay classy Sonja.  "would I still do it if my daughter were at show? " stops a second. "Yes, yes I would" nice. 

[QuinnM]

Dorinda opening champagne makes my night.

Edited August 16, 2018 by QuinnM

[dosodog]

Dorinda is the gold standard for waitresses. 

As long as she doesn't sample your drink before she brings it to the table....

[bosawks]

“Nice gesture”, has Dorinda met these people?

ETA:  

“He’s always invited”

”You only have to ask”

These are not the same thing...

Edited August 16, 2018 by bosawks

[Rosiejuliemom]

I like Carole's dress.

[ShawnaLanne]

Dorinda, your friend got tens of thousands of dollars in free advertising. I think it's even with them. Again, an intro does not merit a bone marrow transfusion level of thankfullness.

[Neurochick]

Dorinda might be a big liar, and why would Tinsley believe Drunklinda?

One day I’ll pick up the newspaper and there will be a mugshot of Dorinda on page six, arrested for public intoxication.

Edited August 16, 2018 by Neurochick

[nexxie]

Lu kinda sucks about inviting Scott but not John last minute, especially after Dorinda provided costumes.

[Chicklet]

I agree that John should have been invited.

Am I delusional or did Lu apologise to Drunkinda in CartAHENYA? Now I wasn't drinking so I could have misunderheard what the two said.

[dosodog]

Unless the invite happened after Luann talked to Dorinda.

Show me the time stamps!

[AnnA]

We're 19 minutes in and had almost 10 minutes of commercials already 

[ShawnaLanne]

4 minutes ago, nexxie said:

Lu kinda sucks about inviting Scott but not John last minute, especially after Dorinda provided costumes.

She does. Lu is being petty. But it doesn't merit the level of rage she's showing, IMO. If Durinda hadn't been well so Slurinda about it, I'd totally be on her side.

Edited August 16, 2018 by ShawnaLanne

[scoobie1]

JO-VANI....   

 

Good grief Dorinda.  How much has she had to drink at this point? 

[nexxie]

I don’t get it - how does someone with such a shitty voice get a cabaret act - and why does Sonja think everyone in the world wants to see her ass?

[scoobie1]

Why is Tinsley telling Dorinda this?  Scott isn't even coming.  It's one thing if Scott was coming. 

[Neurochick]

Luann might have thought Dorinda wasn’t even with John, I thought they had broken up.

Carole, you’re full of shit.

Have another drink Dorinda.  It would have been wrong if Luann didn’t invite Dorinda since it was Dorinda who got her the dresses. 

Edited August 16, 2018 by Neurochick

[ShawnaLanne]

I love the black shean of Bethenny's dress. All the women's dresses look fantastic.

Oh, Carole, you shit stirring , B. Tinsley, you are stupid for stepping into that shit.

1 minute ago, scoobie1 said:

Why is Tinsley telling Dorinda this?  Scott isn't even coming.  It's one thing if Scott was coming. 

Carole wants to stir the pot.

[Rosiejuliemom]

1 minute ago, nexxie said:

and why does Sonja think everyone in the world wants to see her ass?

She thinks that if she flashes her ass enough, everyone will forget about her crumbling townhouse?

[bosawks]

I’m trying to explain these people to my mother, since she’s staying with me and watching the finale was a nonnegotiable, and she’s looking at me with the “where have I gone wrong” eyes....

[QuinnM]

Oh gosh Ramona is getting right in there.  A stab agenda.  So now Dorinda and Luann’s fight is the highlight of the evening.  I want an evening of crazy people laughing.

[Fiero425]

1 minute ago, scoobie1 said:

Why is Tinsley telling Dorinda this?  Scott isn't even coming.  It's one thing if Scott was coming. 

It's the thought that counted! That is a little scummy; invite a stranger over John when Dorinda actually did talk to her about this! Deflecting won't work when the reunion rolls around! ;-)

[Rosiejuliemom]

Lu is good with the stage banter, I'll give her that much.

[ShawnaLanne]

Oh, the rage on Dorinda's face. ...

Carole looks satisfied.

Take another drink, Dorinda.

Ooh. Ramona looks great.

Rachel Dratch!

[Rosiejuliemom]

This titties song has nothing on the Christmas "I wanna fuck you IN THE ASS" song.

 

Still good, though.

[nexxie]

Lu’s better talking than singing - funny!

[dosodog]

2 minutes ago, bosawks said:

I’m trying to explain these people to my mother, since she’s staying with me and watching the finale was a nonnegotiable, and she’s looking at me with the “where have I gone wrong” eyes....

BWAHAHAHAHA! 

Moms.  Love and judge in just one look.

[scoobie1]

Just now, nexxie said:

Lu’s better talking than singing - funny!

Yes since she's awful at singing.  

[bosawks]

Billy Stritch did well by Lu getting his Broadway peeps on board.

[Rosiejuliemom]

1 minute ago, ShawnaLanne said:

Oh, the rage on Dorinda's face. ...

Yeah, Dorinda is pissed and just itching for a fight.

 

She needs to chill the fuck out about the dresses.

[Keywestclubkid]

Thank god this season is ending is all I’m saying Now we just got to set through a reunion all about that stupid fight 

[Fiero425]

Just now, scoobie1 said:

Yes since she's awful at singing.  

She's morphing into Tallulah Bankhead! Tallulah, Tallulah, Tallulah! ;-)

[scoobie1]

Just now, Rosiejuliemom said:

Yeah, Dorinda is pissed and just itching for a fight.

 

She needs to chill the fuck out about the dresses.

She's pissed and drunk.  Not a good combo. Usually she drinks then gets pissed. But this time she was pissed before. This won't end well. 

[b2H]

I think Dorinda is actually right to be upset.  However, I would not stay around for the show.  Everyone else is having fun.  She is sitting there with a grimace on her face.

Dorinda and Lu are pretty much done. 

[KungFuBunny]

Okay, I'm psyching myself up...

I, KungFuBunny, aka Dorinda for the night, am going to be the first one to congratulate Luann, I'm gonna give her a big ole hug

What?

I gave her a black eye?

Are you sure I thought it was the smokey eye makeup. I didn't do that!

She must have tripped on the Jovani dress and hit her face

Edited August 16, 2018 by KungFuBunny

[Neurochick]

Have another drink Dorinda.  

I am really seeing what a mean, nasty, resentful drunk looks like.  Dorinda just lives to fight.  Frankly, I thought she and John were over.

[scoobie1]

LOL at Ramona dancing to this non song.  

[QuinnM]

Just now, b2H said:

I think Dorinda is actually right to be upset.  However, I would not stay around for the show.  Everyone else is having fun.  She is sitting there with a grimace on her face.

Dorinda and Lu are pretty much done. 

The Jovani thing is getting old.  Once is fine but moderation is something you should work on.

[Keywestclubkid]

Dorinda slowly getting more pissed and drunk lol that face 

[chewycandy]

Ramona was SO pumped for Money Can’t Buy You Class. 

[SweetieDarling]

12 minutes ago, dosodog said:

Unless the invite happened after Luann talked to Dorinda.

Show me the time stamps!

Dorinda said she texted/talked to Luann at 9 that morning. Tinsley said Luann texted her at 10. Pretty shady, if you ask me, especially if Dorinda helped out so much with the wardrobe. Don't be so uncool Luann. I don't blame Dorinda, I'd be livid. I hope (but doubt) she skips the after party.

[ShawnaLanne]

Sonja showing that money can't cover your ass.