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Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!


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Shout out to everyone participating in the conversation about Jill’s miscarriage/stillbirth. You’re navigating a difficult topic with respect and thoughtfulness and your contributions are kind, considerate, constructive and informative. 

Thank you. 💚💚

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On Monday, September 26, 2016 at 10:51 AM, doodlebug said:

Yes, but it would require witnesses and testimony.  Many lay midwives, especially in states where it is not legal, swear their clients to secrecy.  I have had women who delivered at home with a lay midwife and had a bad outcome lie to my face and claim that there was no one in attendance, just their husband. In one case, the lay midwife, who I knew was a lay midwife having met her on multiple occasions, was standing right there and claimed she was a personal friend of the couple who just happened to 'drop by' for a visit just minutes after the baby was delivered by his mother with no assistance from anyone else.  Thank goodness she had a bag and mask in her purse and was able to administer CPR until the EMT's got there! (Baby was declared brain dead 2 days later).

  Many of these folks are deeply religious and select midwives with similar beliefs and there is a whole lot of hooting and howling about 'God's will' and the like when a tragedy occurs.  I personally spoke to a police detective who was investigating a lay midwife who was well known for botched deliveries including infant deaths.  I had a patient who came to my office for a postpartum visit after one such delivery which resulted in the tragic and unnecessary death of her baby.  She told me and a CNM who worked with me the whole story and there were multiple huge mistakes made over the 3 days (!!!!) she was in labor at home.  We were independently contacted by a detective who was investigating the death at the coroner's request because the baby died of traumatic injuries which occurred at his birth.  We told him what we knew, we begged the patient and her husband to talk to the police, but no, she refused as did her husband.  They told the detective that she had had no prenatal care, that she and her husband had made the decision to deliver the baby themselves at home and that's what they had done.  No one else was involved.  He knew that they were lying, but what could he do?  Arrest them?  They'd already lost their child.  BTW, this supposedly religious lay midwife went to other members of their church and told them that she was suspicious that the woman and her husband had physically abused their newborn and caused his injuries themselves which resulted in them being shunned by their congregation just when they needed support.  There's a lot of pathology out there.  The detective told me he had interviewed multiple other families and always got the same response; they protected this woman, and, as far as I know, she's still practicing.  She has never been prosecuted.

This is sick. I can't believe it's legal. 

  • Love 3
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14 hours ago, Vaysh said:

 Putting in a couple of hours at the gym every week could save her a lot of grief down the line.

I understand what you were trying to say in your original post. If Jill is going to be a professional brood mare, regular workouts would make that job a lot easier. The core work would also improve her posture. All the Duggar girls slouch. 

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I think I have to remind people fundie does not equal quiverful.  Most quiverful are fundie, but not all.  Many fundies are quiverful, but again not all.  Plus most quiverful do not practice it like the Duggars with the aim to create as many children as possible.

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1 hour ago, Absolom said:

I think I have to remind people fundie does not equal quiverful.  Most quiverful are fundie, but not all.  Many fundies are quiverful, but again not all.  Plus most quiverful do not practice it like the Duggars with the aim to create as many children as possible.

Their branch of Quiverful is  Duggarful (of shit)!

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6 hours ago, Darknight said:

I wonder what would happen if a fundie had infertility? Jill isn't pregnant yet. She got pregnant quick after I gothard, I mean I do. Now he's almost 2. 

I am hopeful that they had enough sense to be aware of the Zika virus, and took appropriate precautions. 

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I'm giving Jill and Derrick more credit for intelligence and long-term planning than they deserve, but assuming there's no miscarriages or secondary infertility issues at play, I wonder if the fact that Jill hasn't gotten pregnant again is a result of taking medical advice seriously and playing the long game. Assuming that they want to guarantee as many children as possible, their best bet is to wait until Jill is fully recovered form her c-section. If she ends up needing another section, she's done---maxed out at 4 unless she wants to take serious risks with her own life (which I don't think any of the Duggars want to no matter how loudly they proclaim that fetuses are worth dying for). She might end up needing a c/s no matter what she does, of course, but I think she desperately wants the crunchy granola vaginal birth of her dreams and a dozen+ children. Better to put off pregnancy for now to increase the odds of that happening in the future. 

To that end, I bet she'll also really watch her diet next pregnancy in the hopes of having a smaller baby. 

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Of *course* her first song on the violin for Izzy had to be a slow hymn. Ugh. I really have nothing against hymns, love them in church, but couldn't she play something more engaging and playful? Oh, right, she couldn't because then he might try to dance.

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On September 28, 2016 at 0:07 PM, Sew Sumi said:

Muffy's little hipster (yes, she used the word). I wonder if she got it from people in AR or heard it from some delusional teenaged missioncationer before they came back to the States? I don't know how else she would know the trend.

Is that flooring REAL brick?  And is it in a kitchen?  How the hell would you clean that?

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Real brick is very popular in kitchens, at least where I live (and the city before this one).  I hate it.  It would be a deal breaker for me in a house.  My guess is, if it is sealed correctly, it would be very easy to clean, but, don't drop anything breakable on it!!

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On 9/18/2016 at 8:41 PM, Portia said:

B-b-b-but didn't she learn all about bank-rupt-cy at the SOTDRT?

Yes, she should have, since the Duggars were pushing the Jim Sammons seminars back in the day.

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Way cool that Izzy has access to books. Way cool that it's Dr Seuss. Not so cool that he is tucked into the recesses of a cold and dark corner.

I have a strange feeling Izzy wasn't "found" neatly tucked into a desk.

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2 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

I have a strange feeling Izzy wasn't "found" neatly tucked into a desk.

My first thought too. That face says, "How much longer do I have to sit here?" Also she forgot to add #fyinternets.

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20 hours ago, lascuba said:

, I wonder if the fact that Jill hasn't gotten pregnant again is a result of taking medical advice seriously and playing the long game. 

When has she gotten medical advice? Not being snarky, I picture the Dr. saying something after the C-section but Jill just remembering blahblahblah, Mom did it.

Dr Seuss wrote about rain forests? 20+ years after he died? Kinda' makes me sad. Didn't know his estate did that. Well, at least it ain't tracts or bible stories. 

Kid looks darn cute. Even in the #get-me-outta-here pic. 

Edited by NewDigs
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1 hour ago, NewDigs said:

When has she gotten medical advice? Not being snarky, I picture the Dr. saying something after the C-section but Jill just remembering blahblahblah, Mom did it.

Dr Seuss wrote about rain forests? 20+ years after he died? Kinda' makes me sad. Didn't know his estate did that. Well, at least it ain't tracts or bible stories. 

Kid looks darn cute. Even in the #get-me-outta-here pic. 

Heh, I can almost picture that, too. The weird thing is, that other than the the advice to STOP HAVING BABIES, Michelle was always pretty good about listening to her doctors. She only had two homebirths, didn't argue when her doctors recommended c-sections, etc. I'm sure that if it had been Michelle with the giant breech baby and GBS+ status, she wouldn't have even considered a homebirth and would have gone immediately for the c-section. Jill in many respects is worse than Michelle about birth, because as they say, a little bit of knowledge is dangerous, and with her bullshit CPM degree, Jill thinks she knows a hell of a lot more than she does. The fact that Israel's birth went the completely opposite of what she wanted, maybe she's more receptive to medical advice now. She was a homebirth transfer and I'm sure her OB knows that she want a lot of children...he must have told her at the time that c-sections + lots of pregnancies is a dangerous combination, and if she wants to guarantee a full quiver, then she needs to do everything safely possible to avoid another section. That means, in part, waiting to be fully healed and not going 2 weeks postdates, thereby making Israel even bigger by the time he was born.

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16 hours ago, BitterApple said:

I was excited until I read "#homeschool."

I wouldn't read too much into that yet.  I'm a toddler mommy myself and the group of mommies that I hang out with all use #homeschool sanctimoniously every time they do something slightly educational with their kids.

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13 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Way cool that Izzy has access to books. Way cool that it's Dr Seuss. Not so cool that he is tucked into the recesses of a cold and dark corner.

I have a strange feeling Izzy wasn't "found" neatly tucked into a desk.

Oh, I can see the little guy sitting at a tiny desk because he'd seen other kids sitting there. I feel bad for THOSE kids. I was so heartened to see some Seuss. I think that's his dad or grandma Cathy. 

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Nah, Cathy's taste in children's books runs strongly fundie. Yay for books, but boo for stunted content. 

Cathy has become just as bad as the rest of them. Her posts since she's recovered from her cancer (an obviously horrible event that would change anyone) have shown her to be a full-on fundie who believes that the devil corrupted her body and caused the cancer. Her (now deleted) remarks about race have also been quite troublesome.  I wonder how Mr. Byrum feels about all this; he married one woman, somewhere in the conservative Christian end of the spectrum, but now has an entirely different person. How has HE adapted to her changes?

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Apparently, no prior teaching experience (or certification or fingerprinting, etc) is required to substitute teach in the state of Arkansas. And even more shocking, he's at Springdale High! PUBLIC SCHOOL!!!!!!11111 

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7 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

Apparently, no prior teaching experience (or certification or fingerprinting, etc) is required to substitute teach in the state of Arkansas. And even more shocking, he's at Springdale High! PUBLIC SCHOOL!!!!!!11111 

I think that's true of substitute teaching most places.  I have a handful of friends in a handful of states that did it as a stop-gap between college graduation and getting a real job - all you needed was a bachelor's degree.

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I'm sorry, but Derrick creeps me out in the picture. Makes me think this is another FU internet moment to prove to us heathens the Duggars will have something to do with the public school system.

Btw, my husband's youngest sister is a substitute teacher with no further education than high school or teaching experience. I have another sister-in-law who was a teacher, but was let go. She now is a para-professional aide and hopes to get hired full time, and she has a college degree. Go figure!!!

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9 minutes ago, alt0233 said:

I think that's true of substitute teaching most places.  I have a handful of friends in a handful of states that did it as a stop-gap between college graduation and getting a real job - all you needed was a bachelor's degree.

In CA, they fingerprint subs in EVERY CITY in which they work. I remember somewhere reading that MICHELLE subbed after high school. Say what? 

What would Derick teach? Spanish? LOLOLOLOLOL

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My understanding is that there is a great need for substitute teachers right now, so it makes sense that he doesn't need a teaching certification. He would, however, need all clearances for any school, public or private. At least he is doing something with his time! 

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I just came here to snark with you guys the second I saw that on my FB feed!

What subject is this guy qualified to even sub for??? Ok, well, he is an accountant so maybe something in that field.  I was thinking of goofball Derick and his interpretive dance nonsense...I forget he actually attempted  a real life. 

I'm pretty surprised that Jim Bob allows this! A public school!!!!!  I need the shocked emoji!!!!!

Edited by Marigold
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Another middle finger to the internet! Jill writes something she calls a "research" paper. I wonder if she even knows how to structure one. As an accountant, I don't think Derick had to do a lot of writing in college. Well, it's not as if it's for a real school, so maybe they don't care if the paper doesn't have a clear thesis and arguing points. In conclusion, they're slobs. 

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I'm always surprised when the Duggar kids use current slang in their social media posts. "Da best?" Where did Jill learn that? Scratch that. I'm surprised when I see them say or reference anything current.  I've always had this impression of them being held captive at the compound, or racing through their errands in the Big Bad Scary World with little-to-no contact with the heathens. When they string an actual, coherent sentence together I'm surprised. When they use a two or more syllable word, I'm surprised. I expect their grammar and comprehension skills to be less than sub-par. I guess their on-camera travels and the crew have seeped in more than I ever thought they would. 

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Requirements for substitute teaching really vary by state. Here in Oregon you need a teacher's license and are paid decently. Really, unless it's a long term sub position, a sub is basically a babysitter. A warm body with an even temperament is all that's needed. An ability to follow written instructions is helpful--as I learned when I came back from a sick day for find a giant stack of dittos on my desk. Where the hell did they come from?! 

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California is similar in its requirements. 

The Dullards are busy little posting bees tonight. Fried oreos? Now I understand why the South has such high obesity rates. Sometimes, ignorance IS bliss! 

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31 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

California is similar in its requirements. 

The Dullards are busy little posting bees tonight. Fried oreos? Now I understand why the South has such high obesity rates. Sometimes, ignorance IS bliss! 

Is that ranch for the cookie? 

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2 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Another middle finger to the internet! Jill writes something she calls a "research" paper. I wonder if she even knows how to structure one. As an accountant, I don't think Derick had to do a lot of writing in college. Well, it's not as if it's for a real school, so maybe they don't care if the paper doesn't have a clear thesis and arguing points. In conclusion, they're slobs. 

What a mess this room is! Maybe someday we will see a clean, picked up house as an Internet FU.

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In California, you must have your bachelor's degree and pass the CBEST (the same exam that has to be taken before you can become a teacher), which tests high school competency. You do have to be finger printed. This allows you to get your 30 Day Emergency Credential which is good for one year (maybe two, it's been a while) and you can sub in any one classroom for no more than 30 consecutive days. I presume this prevents you from making the syllabus or lesson plan, and rather you show up with instructions from the teacher with what you need to do. I subbed everything from kindergarten to high school (where the admin I was waiting to speak to for the key to the classroom asked me if I was a new student D:, I was dressed nicely!), and it's really just about going through the lesson plan and keeping students in line. I had a friend who was sponsored by a district to get a normal teaching credential after starting as a sub (don't know the details on this but remember it being an option to become a full time teacher).

I imagine Derrick is fine for basic competency because he has his bachelors, but would imagine that he (and many people!) would have trouble if he had to answer questions in certain subjects. A sub is there to cover every subject possible, or else they limit their chances of having a job that day. I remember having shit subs, and having amazing ones, and teachers would ask us the next day if we liked a certain sub so they could request them in the future. I think it's just great he's doing a real job where he has to answer to someone else.

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Derick is substituting at a public high school?! My, that's almost as big of an F.U. to Boob as the man bun. I'm rooting for this, but I'm not optimistic. He'll probably get the axe when he tries to rope in some converts during study hall.

I've been burned too many times to have high hopes for anyone who goes full Duggar.

Edited by BitterApple
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I've passed CBEST and CSET, and lord knows I've been fingerprinted a thousand times (just seems like it for different jobs, but also as part of the credentialing process for the state). It sucks that subs have to pony up $100 for prints in every city they sub in. It's not like they make a fortune doing this. 

At any rate, I doubt AR is as stringent. I doubt Derick could have taken and passed an equivalent of CBEST in the time since he's been home (if AR even requires such a thing). I had to book a couple of months ahead of time to get a spot. 

Edited by Sew Sumi
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What is the fingerprinting for? I would think all states require a CORI to substitute teach, but it doesn't include fingerprinting. 

I wonder what subject Derick is teaching, and if he is a get called each day kind of sub or long-term. From the hashtag it appears it may have been for just one day.

Maybe its me, but once I had my own place I no longer hung out in my bedroom.

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Did they fry those Oreos? At home? Like in deep fat? And then put them in a styro bowl? Right before bedtime? They crazy. Though Derick could use a couple lbs.

Maybe they started doing that oddly angled photo thing 'cuz it's harder to see Derick's janked jaw. Poor guy.

Florida sub requirements vary by county. High school dilploma only needed here. At least he's out in the "real" world.

I'm no Suzy Homemaker but that bedroom... 

1 hour ago, GeeGolly said:

Maybe its me, but once I had my own place I no longer hung out in my bedroom.

And that ^^^

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My friend Google tells me that substitute teachers in Arkansas public schools are required by the state to have at least a high school diploma (or GED), and any sub who works more than 30 days must have either a bachelor's degree or a state teaching license. All other details are up to each district. Fayetteville (isn't that close to Duggarland?) contracts out its sub hiring, and someone with a BA and no teaching license will earn $80/day. Springdale public schools require at least a GED, background check, and attendance at a workshop. Not sure about the pay. EDITED to add: I looked again at Derick's IG post; I think he was at Springdale High School.

I think Derick's doing it to get out of the house, and maybe as an internet FU, and maybe because even if it won't even cover their fast food and Starbucks, there's a little dignity in earning a paycheck with his name on it. And maybe to see if he likes teaching. Perhaps he's adjusting his ambitions and life plans to reality. Although specifically, it seemed that he was covering classes after a student died and people were out for the funeral.

Edited by Jeeves
Updated specifics about Derick's substitute stint.
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I'm not sure Jill is that self-conscious about the piles of shit all over the floor since she hashtagged "messyroom". Again, for women who voluntarily define their own destinies as helpmeets, I just don't get how the older, married girls completely forgot how to cook and clean.

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