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Josh & Anna Smuggar: A Series of Unfortunate Events


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Wherever JimBoob tells them to live.  It is not like Joshy has money saved and can make head-of-household decisions.

I'm wondering if Josh didn't buy that blink-of-an-eye Arkansas house with cash. If he did, that money from its sale is probably hidden somewhere for him to use to support his family in the short term. He was making a considerable salary in DC.

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I wonder if a man getting a snip job done on his manly parts is a no no in the Gothard movement. A man has to prove he can get the little woman knocked up. Josh wants his cake and eat it too. Yes, his parents will not win parents of the year award, but he is twenty eight years old. Time to stop blaming mom and dad for the crappy way his life ended.

 

Courage and strength are not traits Josh has a lot of. Which is unfortunate when you were born and raised to be an arrogant little shit. Combination seldom ends well, I think. And I would guess that Josh is now living his ending -- which will go on until he succumbs to natural causes in his 70s or 80s, perhaps. It's not going to be a pretty life from here on out, I'm guessing.

He's lied about everything else in his life -- why would he believe that lying about getting the snip is a problem?

 

Cause he's an enormous cowardly weenie and not very smart?

  • Love 8
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Courage and strength are not traits Josh has a lot of. Which is unfortunate when you were born and raised to be an arrogant little shit. Combination seldom ends well, I think. And I would guess that Josh is now living his ending -- which will go on until he succumbs to natural causes in his 70s or 80s, perhaps. It's not going to be a pretty life from here on out, I'm guessing.

 

Cause he's an enormous cowardly weenie and not very smart?

I have got to slow down my reading, because I was going to ask you Churchie, how you knew his cowardly weenie was enormous. 

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I have got to slow down my reading, because I was going to ask you Churchie, how you knew his cowardly weenie was enormous. 

 

Speed reading: Not all it's cracked up to be, but often good for a laugh.

 

Actually, given the level of arrogance and dominance he's long tried to project, I'd guess that his cowardly weenie is kinda small.

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Speed reading: Not all it's cracked up to be, but often good for a laugh.

 

Actually, given the level of arrogance and dominance he's long tried to project, I'd guess that his cowardly weenie is kinda small.

He should run for president.  ;)

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The article says Josh is "home," and my brain automatically included "at mommy and daddy's house." I suppose they'll throw the Josh Duggar family back together, but I can totally imagine him back in the boys dorm, under scrutiny of a buddy-brother, until JB hands him back his balls.

 

No, the Arkansas Doughboy will stay under wraps until the newly revised Duggar TV show is firmly underway. They can risk Anna's sanity and sexual/reproductive health; they can risk getting porn site viruses on the home computer; they can risk having John David and Jim Bob shaving Josh's head and having him scrub porta-potties for a month, but ain't no way in HELL they'll risk letting him fuck up the new gravy train.

 

Oh, and TLC? Kiss my ass.

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That's so funny because I read it as 'enormous weenie' as well!

Quoting this one just because it was the last of a string of chuckles. Yup, count me in with those who speed-read that with an element of confusion. I'm not sure the words "enormous" and "weenie" have ever been used in a sentence referring to Josh Duggar before.

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Josh is Jim Bob's bitch...Josh should practice saying "yes, Dad" over and over because he is going to be saying that all day every day.

This is good news for Ben! Ben might get a promotion to mowing lawns and can take his head out of Jim Bob's toilet. Win for Ben!!!! Go, Ben, Go!!!

Edited by Marigold
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Josh is Jim Bob's bitch...Josh should practice saying "yes, Dad" over and over because he is going to be saying that all day every day.

This is good news for Ben! Ben might get a promotion to mowing lawns and can take his head out of Jim Bob's toilet. Win for Ben!!!! Go, Ben, Go!!!

Joshley Madison will be on toilet detail while Bin is in the recording studio as the hottest "Christian rap" star.

 

It's not all bad. Toilet cleaning gives him lots and lots of free time to rebuild his porn and strippers network.

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True dat. The guys that Cisco would bring in to share testimonies and now working at RU were maybe six months to a year out of the program themselves! That program is laughable in every conceivable way. 

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Cisco promised us a talk on demonic possession this Friday.  I really need to know how the devil took hold and caused Josh to stray from God's plan.  We wouldn't want to place the responsibility for his actions on little Joshie. 

 

While I agree that enormous and weenie have rarely been used in the same sentence as Josh Duggar, I am pretty certain enormous and dick  have; e.g., Josh Duggar is an enormous dick.

Edited by Muffyn
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Cisco promised us a talk on demonic possession this Friday.  I really need to now how the devil took hold and caused Josh to stray from God's plan.  We wouldn't want to place the responsibility for his actions on little Joshie. 

I want him to explain how Satan entered Josh's heart will a full construction crew and, according to Josh, "built a fortress."

Edited by Mollie
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Seriously, I'm curious where Josh is.

I grew up Fund Lite (none of this circus Gothard nonsense). A sinner like Josh is usually removed. Acoording to Amy, the girls can't go to her house for fear of sin exposure. Josh is living in the Duggard compound bringing all that sin into the home? That sounds unlikely.

And yet I can't see Jim Bob letting Perv Josh out of his sight for 2 minutes because you know Josh will get into another scandal or God forbid, bother a child.

He must be in the treehouse...John David's training with his fake law enforcement job will come in handy. Poor John David....demotedto guarding Josh in a tree house...

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Seriously, I'm curious where Josh is.I grew up Fund Lite (none of this circus Gothard nonsense). A sinner like Josh is usually removed. Acoording to Amy, the girls can't go to her house for fear of sin exposure. Josh is living in the Duggard compound bringing all that sin into the home? That sounds unlikely.And yet I can't see Jim Bob letting Perv Josh out of his sight for 2 minutes because you know Josh will get into another scandal or God forbid, bother a child.He must be in the treehouse...John David's training with his fake law enforcement job will come in handy. Poor John David....demotedto guarding Josh in a tree house...

Wrong again! He'll be in the in the prayer closet (clears throat and corrects self) ahem...war room....comforting his rod and staff....

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But the Duggars "do everything a little differently," don't they? Hey, dear Prince Josh was the victim of Satan. (See, "heart, fortess built in," above.) What if, away from the cameras, they've thrown a fatted calf on the grill and held the prodigal son welcome home party?  That doesn't strain my imagination at all.

 

These people have put on a fake - or at least, a very edited -  life for TV cameras for a decade. They've soft-pedaled their horrible Christian patriarchy beliefs for the camera, but haven't been smart enough to scrub the evidence from the innernets so their connections with the Pearls and Gothard and Vision Forum are out there. IMO they don't think twice about saying one thing to the public/media and something different in what they probably think is their "real life" (vs. their made for TV "ministry" aka "job which pays off big in money and freebies and fame").

 

When the sh*t hit the fan - twice - last year, they tried spinning it and the best thing they did was to get Josh locked up in Jesus Jail. But these people who think it's great to put a married woman with FOUR kids, into a girl's dorm. IMO they are so freakin' insane that you can't predict what they'll do by using ordinary human reasoning.

 

They could put him in the boys' dorm. They could install him with wife and kids in a separate house. They could be planning the Josh Redemption Tour right now. They could be in front of a TLC crew as we speak, shooting the Redeemed Josh story lines. See, his misdeeds caused his family so much weeping and hurt. And now, Jesus. And they all lived happily ever after.

 

I don't know that's where it's going, but I wouldn't be surprised if it does.

 

Edited for grammar

Edited by Jeeves
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that pasty, busted can of biscuits and his slack-jawed daddy

 

OMG, I am *dying* over here!  Thanks for the chuckle on a Friday morning!

 

 

 

This isn't the 1920s!

She could get in line for welfare and collect child support like millions of other single mothers do. She could get loans and go back to school. She could find another man if she's so inclined. Anything.

Guess what? She could take a goddamned bus!! No reason for a car. Honestly. She has choices.

Sorry looky. .not directed at you at all. I just loathe women with victim mentalities that can't exist without a man.

 

Heck, she could sell her story to any paper in the country for millions of dollars, and she'd be set up for life.  But let's get real; it's never, ever going to happen.

Edited by Kat From Jersey
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I don't think anyone would pay Anna millions for her trite story.  My evangelical/fundie front man husband cheated on me?  It's a multiple times a year event.  She might get $50K if she was lucky.

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Anna could parlay her "tell-all" breakaway moment into a career of speaking out against church-sanctioned child abuse, or she could be an advocate for cult survivors, or an education activist, or any number of things that would strengthen her TRUE relationship with her religion and turn her trial into a triumph. What planet am I on, right?

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Anna could parlay her "tell-all" breakaway moment into a career of speaking out against church-sanctioned child abuse, or she could be an advocate for cult survivors, or an education activist, or any number of things that would strengthen her TRUE relationship with her religion and turn her trial into a triumph. What planet am I on, right?

Def not Planet Duggar, lol.

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I just went to get another coffee and on my work bulletin board there's a flyer for an AYCE pancake breakfast next week at North Love Baptist Church!  If Josh was still in town, I'd be tempted just to see if I could sneak a cell pic.

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I just went to get another coffee and on my work bulletin board there's a flyer for an AYCE pancake breakfast next week at North Love Baptist Church! If Josh was still in town, I'd be tempted just to see if I could sneak a cell pic.

Aw, take one for the team and go! I almost convinced my cousin in Tennessee to crash one of the Bateses' weddings but she bailed once I told her they don't serve booze:(

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Considering how fervently the Duggars believe the patriarch should be the decision maker and breadwinner, it's interesting that Anna being a cast member in this upcoming tv charade while Joshley remains too toxic even for TLC leghumpers essentially violates that sacred fundie commandment.

Not if she was instructed to be a cast member by her husband or father in law.

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I read it last week. It absolutely does show why someone like Anna would think she should not even entertain thoughts of leaving, not feel she's able to leave, not want to live outside the cult - I mean family - and not feel she's entitled to demand respect from Josh, even for her children. When the author was dissatisfied, she tried harder to be a good wife/woman/mother. Since the idea has been raised that Anna feels guilty and responsible (at least partly) for Josh's behaviour, it would follow that she'd think that the way to make it better for her and M1-4 would be for her to improve and become even more extreme in her thoughts and behaviours.

Right. She won't give him "more" sex, because I'm sure she never refused him. She'll just give him the kinky sex he craves.

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I am thinking by April Fool's day that fool will be showing his face.  Hiding out - yeah, right, that won't last for long.

I'm sure the Paps are combing Tonitown as we speak. They maybe be start and hide Josh with eh Bateses or whatever bunker Gothard's in, though.

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Not if Boob gives him the Flipphone of Shame. 

 

Agree that he's the low man on Boob's totem pole, and will probably be so until Jackson is absorbed into the Duggar workforce. 

If anyone can figure out how to get around the Flip Phone of Shame, it's Joshley Madison.

 

I'm sure he was introduced to the wide world of burner phones during his stay at Jesus Jail, for instance.

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If anyone can figure out how to get around the Flip Phone of Shame, it's Joshley Madison.

 

I'm sure he was introduced to the wide world of burner phones during his stay at Jesus Jail, for instance.

However lets not forget he signed up to Ashley Madison using his own credit card tied to his real address.

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However lets not forget he signed up to Ashley Madison using his own credit card tied to his real address.

This is true. The Busted Can O' Biscuits is not quite as sly as his family believes he is.

 

Here's another question that's dumber than a box of hair: Would anyone here consent to spending time with a family member if that family member demanded a "chaperone" to see you? Perhaps I should take this to another forum, since it was in the press recently...

I'm sure the Paps are combing Tonitown as we speak. They maybe be start and hide Josh with eh Bateses or whatever bunker Gothard's in, though.

I don't think the Bateseseses would be willing to take him in, either. I realize they are cut from the same cloth, but one would like to believe that Gil Bates cared more for his children and grandchildren than that.

Edited by Missy Vixen
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But the Duggars "do everything a little differently," don't they? Hey, dear Prince Josh was the victim of Satan. (See, "heart, fortess built in," above.) What if, away from the cameras, they've thrown a fatted calf on the grill and held the prodigal son welcome home party?  That doesn't strain my imagination at all.

 

These people have put on a fake - or at least, a very edited -  life for TV cameras for a decade. They've soft-pedaled their horrible Christian patriarchy beliefs for the camera, but haven't been smart enough to scrub the evidence from the innernets so their connections with the Pearls and Gothard and Vision Forum are out there. IMO they don't think twice about saying one thing to the public/media and something different in what they probably think is their "real life" (vs. their made for TV "ministry" aka "job which pays off big in money and freebies and fame").

 

When the sh*t hit the fan - twice - last year, they tried spinning it and the best thing they did was to get Josh locked up in Jesus Jail. But these people who think it's great to put a married woman with FOUR kids, into a girl's dorm. IMO they are so freakin' insane that you can't predict what they'll do by using ordinary human reasoning.

 

They could put him in the boys' dorm. They could install him with wife and kids in a separate house. They could be planning the Josh Redemption Tour right now. They could be in front of a TLC crew as we speak, shooting the Redeemed Josh story lines. See, his misdeeds caused his family so much weeping and hurt. And now, Jesus. And they all lived happily ever after.

 

I don't know that's where it's going, but I wouldn't be surprised if it does.

 

Edited for grammar

Actually, I totally buy this. They forgave Smuggar for fucking CHILD MOLESTATION! What's a little adultery when armed with great "professional counseling" like those movies "Fireproof" and "War Room?" 

 

Smuggar is playing nice (he certainly knows how to fake it), and I predict he'll be on the show either in this season's finale to set up next season, or re-introduced next "season," when the scandal isn't so fresh. But mark my words, he and his despicable parents will all be back on the air as they once were before the year is out. 

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Actually, I totally buy this. They forgave Smuggar for fucking CHILD MOLESTATION! What's a little adultery when armed with great "professional counseling" like those movies "Fireproof" and "War Room?"

Smuggar is playing nice (he certainly knows how to fake it), and I predict he'll be on the show either in this season's finale to set up next season, or re-introduced next "season," when the scandal isn't so fresh. But mark my words, he and his despicable parents will all be back on the air as they once were before the year is out.

Yup...def a double standard on TLC..if I was Mama June I'd be hopping mad...even though they're also a southern white trash family with a bunch of kids, Mama June and Sugar Bear are a lot more like able and better parents than Boob and Mattress. If they put that pasty, sly, busted can o biscuits back on the air, only the leg humpers will be happy about it Edited by Arwen Evenstar
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Smuggar is playing nice (he certainly knows how to fake it), and I predict he'll be on the show either in this season's finale to set up next season, or re-introduced next "season," when the scandal isn't so fresh. But mark my words, he and his despicable parents will all be back on the air as they once were before the year is out.

I agree. I'm sure Josh will get a high paying 'counselor' job at RU, too. It'll coincide with the book's release.

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Just catching up and I'm now IN LOVE with Michael K:

 

I’m sure that if it’s true, that child will feel so special when they learn that their brainwashed mother and their dried smegma ball of a father made them in the rehab facility where their dad was banished to after he had rough sex with porn stars.

 

 

"Dried smegma ball of a father."  Can't think of a more apt description. 

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I don't think anyone would pay Anna millions for her trite story.  My evangelical/fundie front man husband cheated on me?  It's a multiple times a year event.  She might get $50K if she was lucky.

Not really her story.

But think about the "self help" angle. There are tons of marriage books on how to survive infidelity, porn etc. Anna already has a name for herself so that will put her book to the front of the line.

She can talk about their marriage, the crisis and how Anna and Josh put the pieces back together again.

I think a lot of people would buy it. She won't make millions but I think the book would sell. Josh and Anna will also be sought after to do marriage seminars, talks etc.

(if people realize that Josh is a child molester also, it might not sell as well but there are a lot of people who excuse his behavior)

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As a mother there is NO WAY I would have put my child in harms way with an admitted molester.  And I would definitely not put that molester, porn addicted adulterer's needs BEFORE the safety of my children.  They love to say don't judge, as they judge others, but if a child molester, porn addicted adulterer moved next door to them they would be the first to judge and scream to the hills for their children's protection. That is unless they were Christians like Bill Gothard, or Josh, than it's OK to look the other way and say don't judge.

  • Love 6
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Oh, I'm sure Anna has a journal with all her Bible verses and very wise advice that Michelle and Jim Bob shower her with...every 15 minutes or so...

She will write about every fear, problem and issue and then every Bible verse that comforted her.

There are tons of those books out there.

Josh will even have his own section...explaining how exactly Satan built a fortress in his heart and how his heart was redeemed. More Bible verses and prayers. he might even publish parts of his journal too!

I think it will be like a journal, devotional, how to and their life all in one book. They won't be a best seller but there are a lot of marriage problems out there. If josh and Anna, who hit rock bottom, can duct tape their marriage together...there will be fools willing to do what Josh and Anna did to "restore their marriage."

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Does anyone really think Josh would go to work for RU?  I think that would be the worst thing he could do, although he might enjoy it.  He could walk around all day wearing his redemption like a badge, run therapy groups where he could tell his story and play judge or mentor on the puny 'clients', and spend the rest of his time napping in his office. 

 

Once a week or more he'll have one of the women who is there because of 'loose morals' in to "clean his office".  It would be a dream for him to realize that these women are paying good money to basically get F***** by Josh Duggar.  He'd probably put a hidden camera in his office so he can watch himself later.

 

Then one day he'll get caught and this time the scandal can be "Josh Duggar is a prostitute and the star of his own porn movies!"

Edited by Zahdii
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I'd force leghumpers to watch these! They certainly wouldn't be so tolerant and forgiving of his behavior! :D

eta: Cisco is a paid employee!

Edited by Sew Sumi
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