Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House

[Absolom]

I doubt the book brought in huge chunks of cash.  Not even one copy was purchased for our county library system and there are not big displays of it in stores.  In fact I haven't even seen a copy anywhere.  Apparently to read it, I'll have to get it from Amazon and I'm refusing.  Not to mention, they'll be splitting what profits they do get at least four ways if not more. 

[PinkSprinkles]

It would probably just make most people shake their heads. These girls have never been in relationships so what could they could teach me about mine??? I'm all for different perspectives, but write about what you know. A book on raising kids that aren't your own would be more on par with their life experience. 

[MrMattyMatt]

Read the customer reviews about the book on Amazon.  The majority seem to be from leg-humpers, and the rest basically say it's a worthless read.

[mbutterfly]

I think Michelle and Jim Bob have said that- but Michelle's reaction to Jill/Derrick hugging show that it is clearly not true.  Jill and Derrick didn't get to decide what contact was okay, or else, the decision for them to do that would have been left up to them.   Pretty much the same thing with their hand holding at their engagement announcement. Hand holding clearly meant engaged- not "courting couple set their limit and decided they could hold hands".

 

Michelle is controlling all this.  (And perhaps Jim Bob- but the way he let Jill/Derrick squeeze together in the rickshaw in Nepal was SO different than the way Michelle inserted herself between Ben and Jessa; it makes me think the 'purity' obsession is Michelle's.)

I think Michelle is a pretty obsessive personality in general. Jim Bob, not so much. 

[mustbeme]

I'm going to chime in on the Bin/Ben thing for just a moment simpley becuase I finally got my cousin to see the difference and thought I would share.

 

Use the words  "big"  and "beg"

 

Bin is a big boy,

PLease don't beg, Ben

 

letting the dead horse drop.

[ramble]

Bin is a big boy,

PLease don't beg, Ben

That helps! Thank you! I'm still struggling to say it but I can see the difference more clearly, or hear it. Although I sound slightly slow sounding out bin, big, beg, Ben in the ridiculous way I'm doing it. I honestly don't know if I can get my brain to say it that way without saying it like a 2 syllable word. At least I amuse myself.

[MrMattyMatt]

Let me give the dead horse one more whack...

 

Click on the little speaker next to the phonetic spelling of the words:

 

Bin: (the way I hear them say his name) https://www.google.com/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#q=bin%20definition

Ben (the way I would pronounce it) https://www.google.com/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#q=BEN%20DEFNITION

[leighroda]

I am ashamed to admit I did buy the book, for my nook... But in my defense it was because I'm in nursing school and my brain is turning to mush from all the medical terms, definitions and procedures... So I thought some mindless reading would help the monotony, boy did I get what I was asking for when I was wishing for mindless reading. I'm barely halfway through and I'm not sure I can will myself to finish. I'm not gonna lie I was hoping for some of the dirt that had been mentioned about jealousy amoung the girls, but so far there was just one little bit about how Jill got jealous of how cute Jessa looked for church one day. If anyone else has a nook and wants to read it I'll lend it (if it's available and if I can learn how)

[Higgins]

Got to love the nursing test questions where you pick the most correct answer or sometimes, the least incorrect.

[DangerousMinds]

Let me give the dead horse one more whack...

Click on the little speaker next to the phonetic spelling of the words:

Bin: (the way I hear them say his name) https://www.google.com/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#q=bin%20definition

Ben (the way I would pronounce it) https://www.google.com/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#q=BEN%20DEFNITION

I was thinking - what about the word "texting?" Surely it's not pronounced as "tixting?" Edited June 10, 2014 by DangerousMinds

[mbutterfly]

I was thinking - what about the word "texting?" Surely it's not pronounced as "tixting?"

It's all in the "n"

[CarolMK]

I'm hoping that the 4 oldest girls who wrote the book will indeed get the proceeds from it, not their parents. Hopefully they had an accountant and/or attorney handle this for them.

 

Back to Jessa and Ben. Anyone want to take a guess on when these two will marry? I'm certain that they will now that he's been a part of their tv show. Yet I don't see the two of them dragging out this courtship for another 3 years. Will Ben go to work for Jim Bob in some fashion?

[MrMattyMatt]

What does Bin do extactly?  Was is car windsheild repairs and going to college?  Jessa never did much either other that be the families official "packer" for trips.  I can't imagine Bin being able to support a family at this point.

 

The boys must first ask JIm Boob if they can court, and then again ask for marriage?  Seems a bit redundant.  For all we know Bin has asked already and has been told it's too soon.  I have a feeling TLC et all are hatching some scheme to get Bin some sort of job somewhere similar to Smuggar, this would help move things along as well as provide for more story lines.

[roamyn]

Ben also was/is working at an insurance company.

You have to have certain certifications to sell insurance. And each type of insurance requires different certifications. I don't know if that's what he's studying in school, though.

Edited June 10, 2014 by roamyn

[MrMattyMatt]

Ben also was/is working at an insurance company.

 

Great!  Thank you.  That's a bit better then.  I'd love to see him in action.  All we ever see is him with gaga eyes on Jessa.  It makes him seem so slow-witted.

[kaleidoscope]

Jessa posing with a gun is causing an uproar:

http://radaronline.com/exclusives/2014/06/duggar-jessa-gun-rifle-jim-bob-michelle-second-amendment-boyfriend-courting-ben-seewald/

[Readalot]

Does anyone remember which episode in the TH Jessa is teasing Ben about his age and he just doesn't get it and then appears agitated?

[bigskygirl]

JimBoob probably has complete control over the older girls finances since they cannot be trusted to make the right decisions for themselves.

[luvbadtv]

JimBoob probably has complete control over the older girls finances since they cannot be trusted to make the right decisions for themselves.

 

I would love for one (or several) of the girls to sue JimBoob for their share of the money.  I think they would have a legitimate case.  Child stars have done it in the past.  They were not reality stars, but there is bound to be a case like this in the near future.

[Fuzzysox]

I think Bin is a little slow on the uptake. The only thing Jessa sees in him is that he is better looking then other fundie boys and who wouldn't want Lorde as a sister in law.  lol

[galax-arena]

Jessa posing with a gun is causing an uproar:

http://radaronline.com/exclusives/2014/06/duggar-jessa-gun-rifle-jim-bob-michelle-second-amendment-boyfriend-courting-ben-seewald/

I don't really care about the picture, but that link also provides some choice quotes from Ben where he compares abortion to slavery. Fuck off, Ben. 

[kaleidoscope]

With all of the violence lately, I have to admit that it bothers me a lot.  It is certainly not sending a message of  "keeping sweet" and Christian love.

[Marigny]

I would love for one (or several) of the girls to sue JimBoob for their share of the money.  I think they would have a legitimate case.  Child stars have done it in the past.  They were not reality stars, but there is bound to be a case like this in the near future.

Not likely since Boob likes to hold that whole headship, authority, and honoring your parents thing over their heads. My bet is that he's letting them live in the house on the cheap and will pass it off as payment.

[PecanSandie]

 

"With all of the violence lately, I have to admit that it bothers me a lot.  It is certainly not sending a message of  "keeping sweet" and Christian love."

 

 

Guns are so much a part of the culture in the South. Not considered unloving, just a normal part of life.

[mbutterfly]

Guns are so much a part of the culture in the South. Not considered unloving, just a normal part of life.

I think many of us, at least I, have some trouble with figuring out exactly what keeping sweet means -- theologically. Visually it seems inconsistent with carrying an assault rifle. But, I guess, really the two things are not related at all. 

Edited June 11, 2014 by mbutterfly

[Marigny]

Guns are so much a part of the culture in the South. Not considered unloving, just a normal part of life.

As a born & raised southerner, I get this but there is nothing cute about this picture. Especially considering the whole Jesus walking in love thing & the fact that we never see nor hear about them hunting or enlisting in the military.

[PinkSprinkles]

It's possible they shoot at a gun club that won't allow the cameras to film (wasn't there an episode where JB took Jessa to a shooting range?). I can't imagine they keep guns at the house with all the little kids around though. 

[Joe Jitsu913]

Ben also was/is working at an insurance company.

You have to have certain certifications to sell insurance. And each type of insurance requires different certifications. I don't know if that's what he's studying in school, though.

I work in the insurance industry and am currently working toward my designations and it is not easy. My guess is that he is doing basic data entry, answering phones etc. No way is he selling insurance or making any commission.

[Absolom]

I think they keep the guns in a locked closet. I seem to remember an episode where one of the daughters opened a closet with guns in it.

[MrMattyMatt]

I think they keep the guns in a locked closet. I seem to remember an episode where one of the daughters opened a closet with guns in it.

Yes, they showed Jill opening the gun cabinet.  Looked like a pretty healthy arsenal.

[Marigny]

Yes, they showed Jill opening the gun cabinet.  Looked like a pretty healthy arsenal.

So, I guess they are prepared for the zombie apocalypse? 

[bigskygirl]

They are in more danger from their ignorance about the real world than they are from zombies. Just saying!!!

[BitterApple]

Regarding Ben/Bin, I have cousins in the South and they pronounce their "en" sounds as "in." I'm from Boston and pronounce "er" as "ah." We all have our verbal quirks!

leighroda, when I was in graduate school, Mary Higgins Clark and Nicholas Sparks were my go-to fluff authors. No judgments here!

[BradandJanet]

 

That picture of Jessa with the gun creepily takes me back to this one of Patty Hearst as Tania.

Edited June 14, 2014 by BradandJanet

[toesocks]

Read the customer reviews about the book on Amazon.  The majority seem to be from leg-humpers, and the rest basically say it's a worthless read.

 

 

I was in the book store a while back and was ticked to see that their book was shelved next to Raising My Rainbow by Lori Duron.

Edited June 14, 2014 by toesocks

[CofCinci]

PEOPLE magazine has exclusive coverage of the Jill wedding and report 2,000 guests for the wedding.

I bet Jessa's wedding will be larger.

[BitterApple]

Ben's views on abortion are typical for an uneducated kid who lives in la-la land and thinks prayer solves everything.

My in-laws have been involved in foster care for over 20 years. They've dealt with scores of unwanted, unloved, uncared for children. I'm by no means inferring those kids would have been better off not being born, I just think Ben and his ilk have this misguided fantasy that everything will be gravy once a woman chooses not to terminate.

And WTF is up with his obsession anyhow? My nephew is the same age and all he cares about is X Box and scoring a halfway decent fake I.D.

[Ljohnson1987]

Why didn't Boob and Mullet just plan a double wedding? They'd be saving the difference.

[Fuzzysox]

Praying that someone better comes along for Jessa. Bin is creepy.

[Fuzzysox]

I'd like to think that Jessa started thinking with her head and not her heart and kicked Bin to the curb after seeing what Jill got (an older educated man with a good future ahead of him).

[BitterApple]

I hope so. The whole thing is just odd to me. I've always had the vibe that Jessa is cunning and clever when she needs to be. After all, she's managed to get out of cooking, cleaning and laundry for conveniently easier jobs like packing and "schooling." So why hitch her wagon to an immature boy who can't give her anything close to the life she's used to?

Does she really think Ben's windshield business will keep her in Uggs and self-tanner?

[McKay]

Jessa's heart doesn't seem any more into Ben than her head does.  Maybe that's just how Jessa is on the outside, but I always expected all fundie girls would behave like Jill after meeting Prince Charming.  After all, their entire life has been leading up to this.

[PinkSprinkles]

Yeah, this relationship would have already been over if Jessa had been allowed to just date him like us heathens do. A few trips to some awful macho movies and making snacks for him and his buddies while they watch a game and make a mess everywhere would have done her in. 

 

Jessa seems like the type who would do well with an older man who values his privacy and interacts with a few, key people in his life (family and friends) while being devoted to his family and lavishing his wife (especially) and kids (all 2 of them) with gifts. He would toe the party line just enough to get an in and then completely drop off the radar once the wedding was over and never appear on-camera again. 

[bigskygirl]

I often wonder if guys are turn away for courting because they do not want to be part of the dog and pony show and toe the JimBoob line.

[EtheltoTillie]

But she keeps saying "I love you" to Ben.  I don't get that.  It seems like giving away too many pieces of the heart for the courting stage.  You'd think if they were going to bag this romance, they would have done so a long time ago.

[PinkSprinkles]

I've always believed that, bigskygirl. I also think a lot of good men have been turned away because they haven't been "fundie" enough. I'm sure there are plenty of god-fearing men who approached JB, but because they had secular educations and don't believe in having a million kids (b/c they know their financial limitations) they weren't good enough for his daughters. 

 

Derrick got a pass with his secular education because he was also a service missionary and lived close by the family. If Derrick lived in Oregon I doubt Jill would have ever met him. 

But she keeps saying "I love you" to Ben.  I don't get that.  It seems like giving away too many pieces of the heart for the courting stage.  You'd think if they were going to bag this romance, they would have done so a long time ago.

 

That's another thing- why is it okay to say "I love you" in a courtship?! If you aren't considered mature enough to know how to control yourself physically (hence the strict no touching rule and constant sibling spies) then you aren't mature enough to understand what it means to love someone romantically. 

[Marigny]

Why didn't Boob and Mullet just plan a double wedding? They'd be saving the difference.

Then they wouldn't get the paycheck that comes with having two wedding specials. 

[Sew Sumi]

Aaaaand the selfies keep on coming. The most recent is older (Jessa's bangs - now pretty much grown out - are in fine form) and depicts Bin in a hard hat. I've heard conflicting reports about where he's living, but if his dad is into building/selling pre-fab homes, my guess is he's still living in Hot Springs and working for Daddy, and not "Mr. Jim" (the sound guy? There was no elaboration on the Duggars' tumblr) somewhere closer to Jessa.

 

Bin and Jessa have posted saved selfies on weekdays throughout their courtship, ostensibly to show how much they miss each other when they're separated. I also think they just like looking at themselves and love the adoration from their teenage leghumpers on Instagram . They both seem quite narcissistic.

[PecanSandie]

For someone who claims that she isn't "worldly" and claims she's naive, and focusing on purity, sure has started wearing tight and bust enhancing shirts and short skirts! Then throw in the rock groupie make-up look, tousled hair and porn star lip poses and Jessa Duggar is sure throwing her all on the altar of trying to look seductive.

[McKay]

My take on Jessa continues to be that she thinks of herself as the perfect princess who can do no wrong.  I'm sure if she saw someone dolled up like she gets, she'd smugly think "what a slut.  Better yell Nike! so everyone takes note."