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OutDaughtered - General Discussion


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Good for the pastor for saying he's not a licensed therapist. Adam's expectations were so high going in and that's never a good thing. I think he thought bc one guy who he'd never met had gone through something similar to what he thinks he's going through, they could commiserate and it's a done deal, he's all better now. As for the preview, he is not "out of options" if that one counselor they showered doesn't work. Come on, let's be a little more realistic about mental health. They are being so remiss imo to throw all these terms (ppd, depression, etc) without a medical workup. What's the deal with the hair, they look like twins. That's not a look I'd ever seen (and don't particularly like) before but now both of them?

Didn't realize until this episode how much Danielle and her sisters look alike. Is she older or younger than they are?

I felt bad for Dale, you could see his genuine panic about losing Hazel.

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Danielle, while crying: "I would hate to think that Adam is depressed because I was ignoring him or not paying enough attention to him."

Oh, for fuck's sake.  I tried to be a little bit understanding in my previous post about this depression storyline of Adam's, but that just takes the cake.  Their only option to get Adam some help is to leave the kids at home and travel to Nashville -one of the current party capitals of the United States- to talk to a pastor?  And on the way, they have cocktails on the plane, go out drinking, and ride a mechanical bull?  Okay, Adam.  Suuuuuure.  I'm sorry, but he is long overdue for a tough love, come-to-Jesus conversation.  I suspect that Adam is having a hard time coming to grips with the fact that his youth as he knew it is effectively over.  My only response to that is: join the club and get on board.  There are a bajillion more of us out here doing the same thing every single day (without TLC paychecks to help us sleep a little easier at night).

Also, Busbys, if you're reading this, stop calling Riley "bad."  Children internalize that crap, especially when they hear it from the time they're still in diapers and drinking from sippy cups.  I have known many, many two-year-olds in my time and not a single one of them has been "bad."  Defiant?  Sure.  Testing boundaries?  Okay.  In need of guidance and positive reinforcement?  Definitely.  But not "bad," you bunch of dumbasses.  Criminals are bad.  Teenagers are bad sometimes.  Toddlers who can hardly formulate words are not.

Edited by SuzyLee
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2 hours ago, Eureka said:

Good for the pastor for saying he's not a licensed therapist. Adam's expectations were so high going in and that's never a good thing. I think he thought bc one guy who he'd never met had gone through something similar to what he thinks he's going through, they could commiserate and it's a done deal, he's all better now. As for the preview, he is not "out of options" if that one counselor they showered doesn't work. Come on, let's be a little more realistic about mental health. They are being so remiss imo to throw all these terms (ppd, depression, etc) without a medical workup. What's the deal with the hair, they look like twins. That's not a look I'd ever seen (and don't particularly like) before but now both of them?

Didn't realize until this episode how much Danielle and her sisters look alike. Is she older or younger than they are?

I felt bad for Dale, you could see his genuine panic about losing Hazel.

Danielle is the youngest according to this article. ( link )

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Well, I'm glad Adam's pastor friend told him what everyone else was thinking - see a professional! However - Jerrid and Juli? How did those two hook up? A "My Parents Insist on Ridiculous Name Spelling" support group? 

I totally relate to Danielle and her schedule. And I only have 3 kids - no multiples, but all close in age. Schedules matter! They actually help the kids more than anyone. I rarely go anywhere without my kids, but the few times I have, my mother and sisters have thanked me profusely for being so scheduled. The kids always knew what was coming next and it makes them feel more at ease. 

But...um....the aquarium without a stroller??? Really???

Uncle Dale continues to be the breakout star. I loved when he put the wrong kid in time out but then was like, "Eh, they're twins". Bahahaha

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12 hours ago, Eureka said:

I felt bad for Dale, you could see his genuine panic about losing Hazel.

I thought the "losing Hazel" scene was as fake as they come. They couldn't leave one of those umpteen older children in the house with the quints until everyone was packed up? At any rate the camera crew knew where she was. 

I did think it was funny when Dale (?) put the wrong child in timeout. 

I am over Adam. 

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13 hours ago, Eureka said:

I hate how they call Riley bad.

Yeah, I hate that too, and they should quit saying that right away. Unfortunately, Riley IS bad. As soon as she's old enough to really comprehend the consequences of her actions, her parents need to get her into a child psychologist. This isn't going to go away -- she was born with these traits and she'll always have them. She needs to learn how to control them and develop acceptable social skills. I don't agree with one of the other commenters -- toddlers can be bad too. In a 2010 study, researchers found that sociopathy and related disorders are 56% genetic.

Riley has tendencies, and that would be enough to scare me to death.

Edited by Dominii
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On 8/21/2017 at 8:38 AM, b2H said:

I am waiting for an admission of an affair.  That's what I take as his mentioning wanting to check out.

I took the checking out as meaning he feels like just up and leaving Danielle and the kids which is total BS because then he wouldn't be available for TLC cameras to capture his every nuance.  Now when the show is over with, yeah, I could see it happening.  

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1 hour ago, 3outta5 said:

I can't help but love this family. I agree the "losing Hazel" bit was staged, but Dale is my favorite so he gets a pass. Doctor time for sure for Adam.

See I didn't think he was faking getting nervous over not knowing where she was. Maybe I am just naive.

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I feel like a lot of people replying to this have never had multiples.  It's...hard.  Unbelievably hard.  You have to be on, all the time.  I would describe it as "relentless," for both parents.  I mean, I only have twins, and there were a few times during the first year that I contemplated suicide.  When I reached out to someone and told them how I was feeling, I was told "well, you shouldn't feel that way."  :(   I also wanted to "check out," many times.  Just get in the car and drive away, so I didn't have to deal with everything for awhile.  I know it was harder for me than for my husband, but I also know it wasn't easy for him, either.  And being told "you should be happy because you have healthy babies" does not help.  Mentally, we KNOW we should be happy with our healthy children, but it's hard to get that message through to your heart when you are sleep-deprived and hormonal and depressed. 

I don't know if Adam is just doing this for the cameras.  This is TLC, and I tend to side-eye everything they put on the air.  Also, this show feels a little too close to real life for me at times, so I've only watched it in short bursts.  I'm guessing Adam has felt stressed and down since the quints were born, which is perfectly understandable.  It's hard to understand how much this changes your life until it happens to you.  I'm guessing he told the producers how he had been feeling, and they decided to play it up and milk it for all its worth.  Then the media grabbed onto it, and now it's kind of getting out of hand.  Just the opinion of someone who can relate, sort of. 

Edited by 88Keys
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36 minutes ago, 88Keys said:

I'm guessing Adam has felt stressed and down since the quints were born, which is perfectly understandable.  

I know if I had quints, the constant worry and stress would keep me up at night.  I'll never forget the look on Adam's face when a financial adviser told them that it would cost $2,000,000 to educate the quints.  That is total BS; even if they all attend Ivys, it shouldn't cost more than $600,000.   I felt sorry for the quint that Riley whacked in the face with her sippy cup.  They've got to do something, because she is out of control.   

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I think it's sad that, in this day and age, Adam feels like seeing a therapist is a sign of weakness and failure.  Get over yourself man, and get some help!

I would love to hang out with Dale. I wonder if he and the other BIL laugh at Adam behind his back.

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I think for Riley, hitting everyone is how she gets attention and she knows it. It's that or change her name to Hazel. :/ Consistent positive reinforcement would help, but im sure that's harder than hell to manage in that household. 

I really hope that Adam had an official diagnosis before these shows were aired. I don't follow them outside of the show so I don't know. I would hope they wouldn't edit in the PPD stuff otherwise, but this is a TLC show...

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2 hours ago, Adeejay said:

I know if I had quints, the constant worry and stress would keep me up at night.  I'll never forget the look on Adam's face when a financial adviser told them that it would cost $2,000,000 to educate the quints.  That is total BS; even if they all attend Ivys, it shouldn't cost more than $600,000.   I felt sorry for the quint that Riley whacked in the face with her sippy cup.  They've got to do something, because she is out of control.   

The Ivies are 65k to 69k per year now. ( I have a granddaughter in who attends one.) I hate to think what they will cost in 16 yrs when the quints and  are ready. I think the financial analyst was factoring that in his estimation. Plus there's Blayke as well.  Texas has and abundance of great state schools, so Adam really doesn't have to worry. 

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I think the Riley thing is being blown out of proportion or she is being singled out by the editors for TV.  They all hit each other.  Just in the previews for next week has Olivia, Riley, and yes, even the precious Hazel hitting one of the others.  Also, they or fans post videos of them doing random stuff on YouTube and they all hit, pinch, bite each other.  Riley is by no means the only one.  Adam and Danielle need to get better control over all of them, not just Riley.  They need to start with the constant screaming for no reason.  They have the ability to use their words, so make them.  

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I watched the drone and money argument episode yesterday. Financial advisor lady said public university for 6 kids will cost 2 million dollars, and will require the family to save a thousand dollars a month per child, or seventy two thousand dollars a year in total. 

Then in next episode they commit a hundred thousand dollars for the spin class gym.

This family's financial situation just gets more and more opaque. How much does Adam earn?

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9 hours ago, Koalagirl said:

I'm glad the pastor told Adam to seek professional help.  Hopefully he will now that he has been "given permission" so to speak.  Here's some additional info about the pastor:  http://www.intouchweekly.com/posts/jarrid-wilson-church-140065

I gotta echo Danielle's question to Jarrid: "Who ARE you?"

None of his websites or social media sites list any qualifications whatsoever for him to be doing what he is doing.

Is that how things work now? Any guy on the street can just declare themselves an expert appointed by Jesus? Shades of Jer & Auj Roloff here.

Also, shades of Derick and Jill Duggar Dillard and their extremely prominent DONATE! button.

I was creeped out by the whole trip to Nashville but I can't find the words to explain why without looking unkind. So I'll wait and see if anyone posts what I'm thinking. I will say again that I think we are not getting the real story of this family. So many holes in the narrative.

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I think Riley is a brat because their discipline is loose and they make a joke of her behaviour and give her attention.  They need to find a better way to address this so she doesn't keep seeking negative attention.  

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Quote

 I gotta echo Danielle's question to Jarrid: "Who ARE you?"

None of his websites or social media sites list any qualifications whatsoever for him to be doing what he is doing.

Is that how things work now? Any guy on the street can just declare themselves an expert appointed by Jesus? Shades of Jer & Auj Roloff here.

I actually want to come to Jarrid's defense here.  I think Adam went online researching PPD in men and found Jarrid's blog.  He figured he found a kindred soul and asked to meet him.  Jarrid was up front about not being a therapist and suggesting Adam see one.  He was willing to try to help Adam but I don't think he claimed to be anything more than he is.  It was Adam who expected more.

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Did anyone count how many times they (all adults) said "B-A-D" in this episode?

Baby girl's first spelling word, wasn't cat, dog, her first name, or just plain "A-B-C",  but it's "B-A-D"?

Speaking of the "adults", I'm not sure why the stroller wasn't left in the van. Its not like you need the thing going into the house and it will take up unnecessary space in the garage. If Danielle told them to take the babies somewhere, then she or Adam should have pre-loaded the stroller into the back. Even so, all those adults who went to the museum, (a) none of them could do a quick turnaround and go back and get it, or (b) pay the fees to rent it from the place or (c) go to whichever store you saw first, buy a modest price one and then donate it to a charity?

Dale , Dear, dear Dale.. We all have family and friends, who have many gifts and talents, that sadly do not include long-term babysitting of toddlers, esp. of other people's children. And that is ok - we do love and like them anyway. I would have never asked Dale (and probably the other BIL) to overnight babysit in the first place. Its not their strongest character trait. Let them stay home and keep their own older children and maybe Blayke, and let the sisters plus Mimi do it. If any person, male or female, friend, family or foe doesn't care to be around your children for a long period of time - take that for what it is (i.e. a message), and don't ask them babysit .

And Dale - showoff your hard work at the gym, and use your height  and those big muscles and carry out two toddlers at a time. Hell, they would have walked out of the house on their own-as they follow each other. The 4 older cousins, would have liked being "helpers" to hand-hold and get the babies in the van.  Leaving Hazel behind to run off, could have been avoided.

Edited by sATL
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1 hour ago, sATL said:

And Dale - showoff your hard work at the gym, and use your height  and those big muscles and carry out two toddlers at a time. Hell, they would have walked out of the house on their own-as they follow each other. The 4 older cousins, would have liked being "helpers" to hand-hold and get the babies in the van.  Leaving Hazel behind to run off, could have been avoided.

Now that wouldn't have been any fun.

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15 hours ago, KBrownie said:

I think the Riley thing is being blown out of proportion or she is being singled out by the editors for TV.  They all hit each other.  Just in the previews for next week has Olivia, Riley, and yes, even the precious Hazel hitting one of the others.  Also, they or fans post videos of them doing random stuff on YouTube and they all hit, pinch, bite each other.  Riley is by no means the only one.  Adam and Danielle need to get better control over all of them, not just Riley.  They need to start with the constant screaming for no reason.  They have the ability to use their words, so make them.  

I agree. I admittedly don't watch this show as closely as others, but I've never seen Riley do anything that makes her stand out, to me. They all seem to hurt each other at times, which is common with siblings and even more so with multiples. My sisters and I fought like crazy as kids, but we've never been violent with anyone a day in our lives. I feel a bit uncomfortable with all the speculation that there's something wrong with Riley. The kids, all of them, could use some more discipline. But I don't think we've seen anything overly problematic. 

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12 hours ago, camom said:

I actually want to come to Jarrid's defense here.  I think Adam went online researching PPD in men and found Jarrid's blog.  He figured he found a kindred soul and asked to meet him.  Jarrid was up front about not being a therapist and suggesting Adam see one.  He was willing to try to help Adam but I don't think he claimed to be anything more than he is.  It was Adam who expected more.

Yes he stated he's not a therapist but what I mean is that he has this nonprofit and writes these books but never states his qualifications, not even a bachelors degree in anything. I find it suspicious. It's all too common in the Jesus world to declare one's self the authority on something as if they are anointed by God. 

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Omg, Dale when he woke up and said flatly "I just woke up and I'm told we are going to the aquarium and I don't know how I feel about that." Or something to that effect. Lmao i died. He's too funny. 

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Asking the aunts and uncles to take the girls on an outing was out of line in my opinion.  Let them play in the yard, blow bubbles, get dirty, etc.  They don't need to leave the house every single day.

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3 minutes ago, camom said:

Asking the aunts and uncles to take the girls on an outing was out of line in my opinion.  Let them play in the yard, blow bubbles, get dirty, etc.  They don't need to leave the house every single day.

True, but they do have lots of time to fill on TV, and oh, the drama of not having a stroller with 5 toddlers. Yeah, sure.

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On 21/08/2017 at 0:15 PM, Former Nun said:

I've seen Adam's fabulous build and muscle tone, but his face resembles that of someone who was once heavy and lost a LOT of weight.

Has there ever been a mention of Adam's weight/health?  

His face honestly looks like it's being ravaged by something. 

Was Jarrid and Juli's baby named Denim?

Are the quints always kept in that pen?

Edited by Kokapetl
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1 hour ago, camom said:

 Asking the aunts and uncles to take the girls on an outing was out of line in my opinion.  Let them play in the yard, blow bubbles, get dirty, etc.  They don't need to leave the house every single day.

 

1 hour ago, Love2dance said:

True, but they do have lots of time to fill on TV, and oh, the drama of not having a stroller with 5 toddlers. Yeah, sure.

I would have preferred to see the drama of what most of our BIL would have said -when TOLD his is going to the aquarium- esp. given what happened the day/night before and it appeared to be a weekend...

something to the effect - "Are you out of your damn mind.. Hell no.. The hell if I'm going... I got plans... It sucks to be you...I'll be here when you get back.. The game is on.. Drive safe-send me a text when you get there...I made reservations at the course... the car needs service.. I'm going to fix xwy in the house"... the list goes on

Dale would be the next one needing therapy - this family is a little too needy for me. Keep my kids AND take them to the aquarium. Be happy they are bathed and fed.

Edited by sATL
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2 hours ago, camom said:

Apparently, Denim is their second son.  The older one is named Finch.  Ugh.

No. No it isn't. Please tell me this is wrong. Lmao Finch? Sounds like a nerdy best friend in a high school movie. (No offense, little Finchy. It's just the first thing I thought of.) I guess I can't judge. I have a kid with a middle name of Bear. 

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8 hours ago, camom said:

Asking the aunts and uncles to take the girls on an outing was out of line in my opinion.

Did she really request an "outing," or did she just want them taken outside...maybe a ride around the cul de sac in their monster-strollers.

On 8/23/2017 at 8:37 AM, Prisonnurse said:

I took the checking out as meaning he feels like just up and leaving Danielle and the kids

I'd bet they've each wished they could just pack up and leave.  There has to be SO MUCH STRESS with this many kids AND having a camera crew there for several weeks...always having to be on their best behavior.  Riley's the only one who's able to be herself.

 

On 8/23/2017 at 10:49 AM, Adeejay said:

That is total BS; even if they all attend Ivys, it shouldn't cost more than $600,000.

We don't know what the costs will be in 16-17 years.

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15 hours ago, camom said:

Asking the aunts and uncles to take the girls on an outing was out of line in my opinion.  Let them play in the yard, blow bubbles, get dirty, etc.  They don't need to leave the house every single day.

I didn't think they outright asked them to take the girls on a big outing. I think it was more of a suggestion, that getting them out of the house is beneficial to everyone. For one, taking them to the park or something is going to help wear them out, so they go down to bed easier. Also, I sometimes found, when my kids were little, that taking them somewhere was easier than keeping them home all day. I know that sounds crazy. But there's something about the novelty of a place they have never been to, or only visit occasionally, that seems to get kids to behave better. They can get bored at home and get into more trouble. Outings help the day go faster as well. With FOUR adults (or 5? did Mimi come?) and several older kids, I really don't think it was that big of a deal. 

Edited by ghoulina
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13 hours ago, Amers said:

No. No it isn't. Please tell me this is wrong. Lmao Finch? Sounds like a nerdy best friend in a high school movie. (No offense, little Finchy. It's just the first thing I thought of.) I guess I can't judge. I have a kid with a middle name of Bear. 

Please don't tell me his first name is Teddy:) I think Bear is cute.

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Adam's hair reminds me of a rooster's comb..then there is his high, twangy, whiny voice, and his poppy eyes. The worst thing about him I think, is the man seems to think he is hot. He went along with more fertility treatments, and now is whining because he can't handle the consequences? Should have thought of that before just having the now famous "just one more." Danielle has total control of him and that is not a good thing. He needs to get his balls back, and then I bet his depression would lessen right away.

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10 hours ago, sATL said:

Since the show is nearest to Houston,  those of you in the path of Hurricane Harvey, please be safe.

Was thinking while watching the Weather Channel his morning and saw League City on the affected map.

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4 hours ago, winsomeone said:

Adam's hair reminds me of a rooster's comb..then there is his high, twangy, whiny voice, and his poppy eyes. The worst thing about him I think, is the man seems to think he is hot. He went along with more fertility treatments, and now is whining because he can't handle the consequences? Should have thought of that before just having the now famous "just one more." Danielle has total control of him and that is not a good thing. He needs to get his balls back, and then I bet his depression would lessen right away.

I think Danielle knows she needs Adam far too much for her to risk alienating him with controlling behaviour.  I'm suspicious about what the genuine motivation behind his trip to Nashville was. I think Danielle probably got blotto on 3 drinks and Adam left her at the hotel and went out and indulged in his secret shame. He's totally more fake tanned, gym bodied and hipster haired than he was before. I don't think it's for his wife.  

outdaughtered-promo-zoom-f2e9b325-9d4f-4

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On 8/23/2017 at 10:12 AM, Maya said:

I thought the "losing Hazel" scene was as fake as they come. They couldn't leave one of those umpteen older children in the house with the quints until everyone was packed up? At any rate the camera crew knew where she was. 

I did think it was funny when Dale (?) put the wrong child in timeout. 

I am over Adam. 

Obviously she wasn't alone in the house. And obviously the camera crew knew where she was. I don't think they had to leave one of the older kids in the house, though, since there was a crew of at least two (camera and sound), probably more.

Dale milked the scene nicely though and I'm sure some TLC viewers won't realize that there was obviously a film crew in the house.

Edited by RemoteControlFreak
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The quints are really out of control in their behavior, yet run to time out and stay there when told to do so. To me this is really suspicious, since they rarely obey any other command. It reminds me of Kate Gosselin..she beat her sextuplets if they didn't comply with time out and { wonder if that is happening here also? These little girls seem so very mean much of the time, and it makes me wonder if they are not being hit, slapped, and pinched by others in the house? Most little kids are just not naturally mean like that.

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3 hours ago, winsomeone said:

The quints are really out of control in their behavior, yet run to time out and stay there when told to do so. To me this is really suspicious, since they rarely obey any other command. It reminds me of Kate Gosselin..she beat her sextuplets if they didn't comply with time out and { wonder if that is happening here also? These little girls seem so very mean much of the time, and it makes me wonder if they are not being hit, slapped, and pinched by others in the house? Most little kids are just not naturally mean like that.

They're two-year-old humans.  They're not dogs who are supposed to obey commands.  

Their behavior seems pretty typical for their age, especially when a bunch of two-year-olds are in a group together.  I see no evidence that these children are being hit or punished in any inappropriate way.  Toddlers often hit each other and hit adults.  They are in the process of learning that that's not the way to react to frustration or anger, but this is a process that takes time. 

Edited by RemoteControlFreak
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4 hours ago, trackrat59 said:

Too much adult drama on the show now.  It's taking away time from the Quints which is why I tune in to watch in the first place.  Not enjoying the show as much.  :(

Exactly.

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20 hours ago, Kokapetl said:

I think Danielle knows she needs Adam far too much for her to risk alienating him with controlling behaviour.  I'm suspicious about what the genuine motivation behind his trip to Nashville was. I think Danielle probably got blotto on 3 drinks and Adam left her at the hotel and went out and indulged in his secret shame. He's totally more fake tanned, gym bodied and hipster haired than he was before. I don't think it's for his wife.  

I just don't think Danielle is the controlling type. Even when things get crazy with the kids, she mostly seems unruffled. I've never seen any rage seething under the surface. 

What evidence do you have that Danielle got drunk? And I think that IF Adam stepped up his grooming game a bit, it was probably because of the TV exposure. Nothing more. I feel kind of bad for the dude, that he can't be into his appearance without people assuming he's gay. 

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