S04.E07: Ashley D's Story

[Elizabeth9]

Subway chips can be low fat and 110-140 calories. Not all Subway is bad; you can get a shitty meal anywhere.

Don't they even spend 5 minutes teaching these people coping skills? When you're in recovery from an eating disorder, it's all about coping skills. If you're 700 lbs, something in your mind is terribly wrong. I just don't understand how they think they (clinic,'doctor) will be successful with the patient if the patient is just expected to give up their coping skill cold turkey, and isn't given any new ones. You could see in the beginning of the show, whenever anything even remotely uncomfortable happened, she was running to food.

I think they should all be in therapy from the start, if not small groups where they discuss life and healthy coping mechanisms.

Doesn't surprise me that someone went from eating disorder to drugs- I went in the opposite direction.

[Gemma Violet]

Shoes don't make a difference. 

 

Maybe not at a very heavy weight, but for me (I'm about 60 lbs. overweight), they make all the difference in the world.  I wear New Balance athletic shoes all day with Spenco shock-absorbing innersoles.  When I get ready to take a shower at night and wear my flip-flops to walk to the bathroom, it feels like I'm carrying an extra 60 lbs. on top of what I'm already carrying.  I can feel it right away in my knees and feet.  After I shower, instead of wearing slippers in the evening, I wear my New Balances and Spencos.  It makes a big difference for me. 

 

Getting back to Ashley, I have to reiterate what has been said numerous times in this forum:  I hate that production insists on a showering/bathing/toilet scene.  It's so disrespectful.  I guess, though, that these people are so desperate for weight loss surgery and can't afford it, they are willing to go along with it.

[gunderda]

I've been wondering why they do the shower scene, and I think maybe it's just for the shock factor.  It's so you say "I don't want to be that!!"  - because really it's the only way we truly see what this disease has done to them.  It gives an excuse to show the body without baggy clothes covering it.  

[junemeatcleaver]

 

I think they should all be in therapy from the start, if not small groups where they discuss life and healthy coping mechanisms.

 

I hate that they don't show these aren't at least recommended therapy from the outset.  The biggest majority of them have some type of trauma in their pasts or seem to be suffering from sort of mental illness or personality disorder.  But at some point TLC decided it was more entertaining to watch these people wallow in their misery and sickness for the first 20 minutes of the episode instead of helping them confront their pain, anger and sorrow.

[ClareWalks]

Ashley said she couldn't stand up for more than five minutes.  I think if she would have invested in some good cushiony walking shoes with shock-absorbing orthotics, it would have made her feet and joints feel a little better so that maybe she could have stood a little longer.  She was wearing flat sandals which had no arch support or anything.  When you're even a little overweight, the right shoes can make a difference.  But then I think maybe she wouldn't have been able to find a pair of shoes wide enough.    

 

I'm not super big but I have terrible foot structure. Cushioned shoes are actually the worst possible things a person who needs support should wear. Firm shoes with a solid arch would be best until her feet get a bit less fat, to where she might benefit from custom orthotics. As a bonus, insurance often covers them for people with diabetes, which I'm certain 90% of these people have.

[Vicky8675309]

I was grossed out by the bare mattress on her bed (didn't notice the kid also didn't have sheets) and she was sitting/lying on the bare mattress naked and slept on that mattress. I have major issues with people not using sheets on their mattresses~~so unhygienic.

 

She, as do many of the people on the show seem depressed. I wonder why that isn't addressed earlier in their treatment. Also her later going from food addiction masking or treating her emotional/psychological pain to use of pain meds (worry about substituting one addiction for another....need therapy earlier to get at the root of the issues)

 

Could they have gotten a family rate on the surgery? The husband, mother, father, and MIL all could stand to lose a bunch of weight.

 

I worried about her son doing the laundry and cooking. He seemed so mature and like such a well behaved kid! But I worried he would injure himself and he needed playtime and to be a kid. I'm sure she loves him but the cynical side of me wondered if she would miss his help more then miss him when he went to school. Awesome kid. There needs to be a balance between child labor and the opposite (think of all those spoiled bratty kids who throw tantrum over not getting their way......I like her kid better but I felt kind of bad for him and worried about his safety--but he seemed happy and loved). At least he knows how to do laundry!!!

 

She should have pointed out the obvious to her family much earlier--their eating habits were torture for her. It may seem obvious but they seemed clueless and once she finally told them then they adjusted their habits (somewhat). Her eating habits, while much better, still could have been better....well at least they had improved.

 

Interesting show--recently discovered it and binged some episodes. It really made me think about what these people (food addicts) go through. I never thought about it before but morbidly obese people with food addiction seem to have it worse than drug addicts--both involve addiction but one involves a substance that you need to survive, is socially acceptable and you can't abstain from. I previously never thought about it and I feel like I can empathize now (still get a little judgmental sometimes but I sometimes get that way with the addicts who are whiney and don't take responsibility for their disease---the ones who aren't ready for help yet or expect to not have to work at it....plus I get annoyed with the ones who like to play the sick role for attention/manipulation/etc....like Penny and more recently I think it was June IIRC--the one whose son had died). It seems like almost everyone has done great on this show except Penny (lol, I watched her episode out of sync with the series based on everyone comments about her). She was so annoying.

Edited February 20, 2016 by Vicky8675309

[aliya]

Plus they throw in the chips. You people all talking about them packing salads and veggies for the trip-or stopping at a grocery store for salad-- they are not going to do that at this point of the "journey". The best thing for people in this situation (600-700 pounds) is to take a cooler, throw a loaf of bread in the car and some cold cuts and sliced cheese in the car- make a damn sandwich when you get hungry. It's not diet food but it's perfect for being on the road and is filling and fast. Dr Na is not going to kill you for eating a sandwich- it's way better than a double cheese burger and fries. Throw some yogurts and some grapes. 

I agree with you about the sandwiches. So they aren't making them out of garbanzo beans, : )  but any sandwich made at home would  probably be lower in calories than fast food. But I think they are so used to pulling up to the drive thru, that it doesn't even occur to them to pack a lunch. I don't get it - which is probably why I find this show so interesting.

[Lightning]

I keep thinking that they show the bathing/showering scenes so we will know that these people are at least clean, or trying to be.  And, also for the shock factor of course,  I think in real life, they probably don't bathe every day due to the difficulty of doing it.  I know in at least one episode where the heavy person was bedridden it was mentioned that her sister came over to bathe her 3 times a week.

 

[operalover]

I don't understand how these people agree to be filmed completely naked. It starts every single show. It's almost like they are blackmailed: If you don't let us film you naked in the tub we will not help pay for your surgery expenses.

[raiderred1]

I totally agree with everyone on the need for therapy.  You don't get to 300+lbs without having an issue of some sort.  When I was in elementary school in the 70's we had a teacher that was morbidly obese, probably 350lbs-375lbs, not really that heavy compared to the folks we see on the show and just in everyday life.  Anyway, she was an awesome, awesome teacher and all the kids loved her.  The one thing I do remember is she always had very crusty, scaly legs.  I always thought it looked so itchy and painful but the fact was she could not reach that area to clean it.  They lived about a mile or two from us and her husband was a farmer and skinny as a rail and so were all her kids.  About 20 years ago I ran into her at a town hall meeting in our old hometown and she had had the surgery and was probably down 100lbs-125lbs but you could see where it had taken its toll on her and she ended up dying just a few years after I saw her.  It was such a shame that we lost such a sweet, smart teacher and human being.  I'm glad there are doctors out there that can help these patients but I think therapy MUST be part of the program.  

My best friend suffered an eating disorder and when she went to treatment they explained that food addiction is one of the worst kind of addictions because you can cut drugs and alcohol out of your life but you need food to sustain you and she said they called it, "Petting the tiger every single day."  Sadly my best friend committed suicide almost 18 years to this day and her molestation by a neighbor is what kept her sick and sad.  She needed extensive therapy and back then she just wouldn't go after a while and the demons finally won.  It didn't help that her mom didn't believe her about the neighbor's abuse. ;(

[ethalfrida]

I totally agree with everyone on the need for therapy.  You don't get to 300+lbs without having an issue of some sort.  When I was in elementary school in the 70's we had a teacher that was morbidly obese, probably 350lbs-375lbs, not really that heavy compared to the folks we see on the show and just in everyday life.  Anyway, she was an awesome, awesome teacher and all the kids loved her.  The one thing I do remember is she always had very crusty, scaly legs.  I always thought it looked so itchy and painful but the fact was she could not reach that area to clean it.  They lived about a mile or two from us and her husband was a farmer and skinny as a rail and so were all her kids.  About 20 years ago I ran into her at a town hall meeting in our old hometown and she had had the surgery and was probably down 100lbs-125lbs but you could see where it had taken its toll on her and she ended up dying just a few years after I saw her.  It was such a shame that we lost such a sweet, smart teacher and human being.  I'm glad there are doctors out there that can help these patients but I think therapy MUST be part of the program.  

My best friend suffered an eating disorder and when she went to treatment they explained that food addiction is one of the worst kind of addictions because you can cut drugs and alcohol out of your life but you need food to sustain you and she said they called it, "Petting the tiger every single day."  Sadly my best friend committed suicide almost 18 years to this day and her molestation by a neighbor is what kept her sick and sad.  She needed extensive therapy and back then she just wouldn't go after a while and the demons finally won.  It didn't help that her mom didn't believe her about the neighbor's abuse. ;(

Those are two of the saddest stories! If only we knew enough to reach out in the correct way when you see these situations. Sometimes we are too young to know what to do but mostly we are just too unlearned to do anything. 

[Muffyn]

Dr. Now has a terrible habbit of blaming everything on excess weight (or at least in front of the cameras)...They did it last season with the one who almost lost the ability to walk (can't remember her name--he was yelling at her to stand up and walk and that's not every effective on someone with neurological issues--trust me) and it was implied that the guy in season one (can't remember his name either...Don?) guillaine barre syndrome was from his excess weight...it wasn't.  He also brushed off her addiction to pain meds as being a part of her obesity!  She better get real help for that addiction or the family will be worse off than if she was just fat!

More and more I despise Dr. Now.  There are times when people need tough love but that is the only thing he offers.  We all see that the people featured on this show almost universally need both psychological and nutritional counseling.  Regardless of the reasons for their obesity, he sneers at them and treats them like they are misbehaving children.  Behavior, especially extreme behaviors, aren't that simple to address.  When they have any complications, he blames them. She has a family history of drug addiction and an addictive personality, so he is surprised she had a problem with pain pills.   She seems very depressed,  counseling should be immediate.  He also seems disappointed when people don't have major medical issues along with their obesity.  he likes to tell us they will all be dead in a few years.  Some of the people shown have major medical issues.  Others have been relatively okay.  

 

I would hope she was tested for cushing's.  Given that she was able to lose so much weight after the surgery, chances are she does not have it.  Hers is a more uncommon body type but it is not unseen, even among people without major endocrine disorders.  She reminded me of a friend with a very similar body type - moon face with a large double chin, thinner arms and legs, major weight gain in the stomach.  My friend convinced herself she had cushing's and sought out doctors until she found one who agreed to do surgery (eight specialists had done extensive testing and told her she did not have it).  it did not help and left her with major health issues.  I have a genetic disorder that usually shows in a particular body type. The body type alone does not meet the diagnostic criteria.  So I am very careful not to ever diagnose people based on body type alone.

 

I am sure the extensive pre-op testing would have uncovered Cushings Syndrome. Or else other deficiencies or irregularities that would have suggested to test further for Cushing's Syndrome. Some people just have a round face and gain weight in their face, other's don't. 

 

My pet peeve about this show is the narration: they ALL sound exactly the same in the monotone voice saying the SAME things:

 

I knew I needed to change. But it was gonna be hard. I need to be there for my family. 

 

Each day I try to do a little more. It is really hard. I still crave food but I know I need to do this for my family. Things are different now.

 

They read off a script that someone else wrote spouting all these generalizations. Even Penny said all the same things that all these people say- she didn't write it herself. And the read it in the same voice, the same intonation. I'd like to hear what these people really think! What they are really experiencing, some of their own anecdotes for example. Nope, just "each day it gets a little easier. I know I have a long road ahead but I'm doing my best. I know this is the best for my son. I try to do a little more each day. I know I have no choice so I am going to do this. I''ve never been able to walk to the mailbox before. I have to deal with my emotions" enough already - what do they really think and feel?

The phrasing that stands out to me is "I haaaaaaaaave to do this."  No, you don't have to.  You choose to.  It is still a choice as are most things in life.  You want to do it.  You see it as the best way to affect positive change in life.  But you do not "haaaaaave" to do it.  I hate the supposedly personal statements that are clearly prompted by the producers.  

Edited February 22, 2016 by Muffyn

[IvySpice]

 

I hate that production insists on a showering/bathing/toilet scene.

I have started looking away because those parts are so repetitive, but my husband is always watching with his eyes bugging out. I think it's because I've been watching from the beginning and only recently dragged him into my mess. There's definitely a shock value where you can't believe what you're seeing when the show is new to you.

 

Good for Ashley that she made so much progress. At the start of the show, I saw all the signs of no hope: husband just as fat, relying on 5-year-old, etc. But she had an amazing year even with her husband trying to sabotage her. I hope there's a follow-up next year.

 

Re the idea that Ashley should leave her husband: maybe so, but I'm betting she'd be in deep poverty if she did. She's uneducated and has no work history. She'd be darn lucky to get a minimum-wage job bagging groceries, and then who looks after the kid?

[Oldernowiser]

The only problem with the non-loathesome ones is that it's actually kind of boring and they have to create some kind of drama arc. Usually it's that they fall off the healthy food wagon, but Ashley didn't really do that, although I confess I zoned out a little.

They did kind of gloss over her abusing her pain meds, other than it gave her a perforated ulcer.

At least this time therapist seemed credible and not someone they got from SAG extras casting.

As for therapy as a last resort...this has been brought up nearly every episode and I really, really doubt we see all there is in 45 minutes and Dr. Now is probably not the only person involved with that decision, by far. I would believe there's a caseworker involved and coordinating all aspects of their care. These are super high-risk, expensive patients and one guy hardly ever calls the shots in those cases.

[stillhere1900]

At least this time therapist seemed credible and not someone they got from SAG extras casting.

 

Guess what.?.  Women can be pretty & smart.

[Oldernowiser]

Guess what.?. Women can be pretty & smart.

Who said anything about her looks? She seemed genuine. Empathetic. Less scripted.

Your conflation, certainly not mine. Dial it down.

Edited February 22, 2016 by Oldernowiser

[raiderred1]

I have a friend that is a therapist near Ashley's town and she would be a great therapist for her.  She has been called to several nursing homes in our area to work with some super obese people and she says all of them have suffered past abuse of some kind.  She said years ago there was a fairly young woman that was almost 500lbs that just laid in her bed at the nursing home and had just given up.  She and the staff tried desperately to help her but she just couldn't or wouldn't fight anymore and she ended up dying of a pulmonary embolism. 

[silverspoons]

I wish Dr. Now had said more about the pain pills causing the ulcer. I would assume it was advil or something like advil not lortab or prescription meds? When Dr. Now said that she had abused pain pills and it caused the surgery, I thought she most have had a complication due to constipation and her hernia but it was an ulcer. I thought prescription pain meds mostly use Tylenol combo because of its safety post surgery with bleeding. I would hate for the show to give the impression Ashley was a pain med addict when she just took too many advil. I guess I was thinking about his because my mom in the last week had a root canal and then needed emergency neurosurgery for a brain tumor. The dr's number one rule was no advil (my mom wanted it for her tooth) because of possible bleeding. They had to explain it to my mom over and over. I still wonder on this show how much is cut out. Do these patients get such little instruction about meds, diet and no counseling till a crisis? Did Ashley really have to wait 2 months till she left the hospital to see a counselor? We have a pretty bare bones hospital but there are still social workers that come and talk to any patients struggling with mental health issues.

[non sequitur]

I wish Dr. Now had said more about the pain pills causing the ulcer. I would assume it was advil or something like advil not lortab or prescription meds? When Dr. Now said that she had abused pain pills and it caused the surgery, I thought she most have had a complication due to constipation and her hernia but it was an ulcer. I thought prescription pain meds mostly use Tylenol combo because of its safety post surgery with bleeding. I would hate for the show to give the impression Ashley was a pain med addict when she just took too many advil. I guess I was thinking about his because my mom in the last week had a root canal and then needed emergency neurosurgery for a brain tumor. The dr's number one rule was no advil (my mom wanted it for her tooth) because of possible bleeding. They had to explain it to my mom over and over. I still wonder on this show how much is cut out. Do these patients get such little instruction about meds, diet and no counseling till a crisis? Did Ashley really have to wait 2 months till she left the hospital to see a counselor? We have a pretty bare bones hospital but there are still social workers that come and talk to any patients struggling with mental health issues.

Very sorry about your Mom, I hope she is recovering well from her surgery.

 

I assumed Ashley was abusing some kind of Tylenol 3 or stronger, but you are right Tylenol is safe for ulcers.  I hope the people on this show get far more information and care than what is shown.

[Peanutbuttercup]

More and more I despise Dr. Now.  There are times when people need tough love but that is the only thing he offers.  We all see that the people featured on this show almost universally need both psychological and nutritional counseling. 

They cut a lot out of the show to fit into the time slot and make a storyline that the producers think will be most interesting to a general audience. Both the patients featured on the show and other "regular" patients of his that frequent weight loss surgery forums confirm that they receive extensive, ongoing nutritional counseling just like you would get from any quality bariatric surgery practice. I think a lot of people do forget what they learned or decide they don't *really* have to do what the dietitian tells them, and that's what gets them in trouble. You wouldn't believe how many people come on weight loss surgery forums every day and ask things like, "my doctor said no grains after surgery, does that mean I can't have oatmeal?" or "ice cream would work well on the puree phase, right? It's not on my list of approved foods but it has the right texture?" or "did anyone else ignore their post-op plan and eat french fries as a mushy food?" Seriously!

Also, his patients I've run across on the WLS boards all seem to just adore him, so I figure there must be something beyond the tough love persona we see on tv. Either that or they've all got Stockholm Syndrome.

[Hero]

They cut a lot out of the show to fit into the time slot and make a storyline that the producers think will be most interesting to a general audience. Both the patients featured on the show and other "regular" patients of his that frequent weight loss surgery forums confirm that they receive extensive, ongoing nutritional counseling just like you would get from any quality bariatric surgery practice. I think a lot of people do forget what they learned or decide they don't *really* have to do what the dietitian tells them, and that's what gets them in trouble. You wouldn't believe how many people come on weight loss surgery forums every day and ask things like, "my doctor said no grains after surgery, does that mean I can't have oatmeal?" or "ice cream would work well on the puree phase, right? It's not on my list of approved foods but it has the right texture?" or "did anyone else ignore their post-op plan and eat french fries as a mushy food?" Seriously!

Also, his patients I've run across on the WLS boards all seem to just adore him, so I figure there must be something beyond the tough love persona we see on tv. Either that or they've all got Stockholm Syndrome.

French fries as mushy food? Lol!

[Elizabeth9]

I'm watching season 1 Ashley's show, and she attends a nutrition class at the doctor's office before her surgery. I know Melissa Morris (S1) also taught some classes. I'm sure they get some nutritional education. However, it never seems they are IN therapy, because it takes Dr Now several months (and usually no progress, or movement in the wrong direction) to suggest therapy, and it always sounds like the people are considering this idea for the first time. I think they all need therapy, personally. I mean, all the rest of us eating disorder people have to get therapy...it really is a whole re-learning process.

[jcbrown]

<inappropriate comment> We had this paused because we are trying to figure out a signal error in our cable to TiVo to HDMI connection. It was paused on a shot of Ashley getting into a vehicle while wearing her purple/magenta shent. My husband glances at the TV and comments, "she should totally go as Grimace for Halloween." Not kind but so very correct. </inappropriate comment>

[notyrmomma]

They cut a lot out of the show to fit into the time slot and make a storyline that the producers think will be most interesting to a general audience. Both the patients featured on the show and other "regular" patients of his that frequent weight loss surgery forums confirm that they receive extensive, ongoing nutritional counseling just like you would get from any quality bariatric surgery practice. I think a lot of people do forget what they learned or decide they don't *really* have to do what the dietitian tells them, and that's what gets them in trouble. You wouldn't believe how many people come on weight loss surgery forums every day and ask things like, "my doctor said no grains after surgery, does that mean I can't have oatmeal?" or "ice cream would work well on the puree phase, right? It's not on my list of approved foods but it has the right texture?" or "did anyone else ignore their post-op plan and eat french fries as a mushy food?" Seriously!

Also, his patients I've run across on the WLS boards all seem to just adore him, so I figure there must be something beyond the tough love persona we see on tv. Either that or they've all got Stockholm Syndrome.

YES YES YES!  If someone really wants to know what its like to have WLS, they need to read the forums and take this show with a grain of salt.  

[AZChristian]

We watched the "supersized" show about Ashley last night (with informational captions), and there was one saying that she was in the habit of taking 24 over-the-counter pain pills a day.  May have been ibuprophen.  I just remember that the caption said she takes 24, and the bottle says no more than 8.

[Hero]

It's frustrating that the show leaves out important information like that ^. Putting it into a "supersized" episode is just dumb. T

[auntjess]

 

May have been ibuprophen.  I just remember that the caption said she takes 24, and the bottle says no more than 8.

Maybe she's taking the 100mg ones.  I thought the prescription pain ones are 800 mg.  (Took 'em when I broke my tail bone.)

[aliya]

Did Ashley really have to wait 2 months till she left the hospital to see a counselor? We have a pretty bare bones hospital but there are still social workers that come and talk to any patients struggling with mental health issues.

I mentioned that I looked into the gastric sleeve a few months ago. I did the paperwork (where they ask about other weight loss measures and possible eating disorders), an interview, and the initial meeting with a dietician. I had the 2nd dietician appointment and the interview with the therapist scheduled when I backed out. My insurance was not going to approve anything without those meetings with the dietician and the therapist - and I would need a 3rd meeting with the dietician before the surgery. You only met once a month, so the whole process would take 3-4 months. It always surprises me that he sends folks home to lose weight then if they lose the weight when they show up the next time, he's like, "Good, I'll schedule you for next week."  How does that happen? Maybe since the show is paying for it, they don't need to jump through all the other hoops?

[silverspoons]

When looking up Dr Now to see if there were any stories outside the show about experiences , I happened to see a document about his wife contesting his divorce. When reading through it the Best care clinic has many employees and services we never see. The 600 lb surgeries are just a small fraction of what is done there. There is certainly nutrition, 24 hour care, testing on site (radiology, blood draws), PT and OT, and other doctors and many PA and NP's. It would be nice if they went back to 2 hour episodes to show the whole team approach of how it really works. Obviously Dr. Now can't do these long surgeries and be able to do all the follow up care. Plus it appears as if the clinic has many other weight loss options for those that have less weight to lose.

 

After reading the divorce, Dr. Now was sure sticking it to his ex wife (of nearly 30 years and several kids). My first husband was a doctor and I understand doctor divorces but Dr. Now seemed cold and was willing to fight for years over small amounts of money.

[Katt]

Wow, her husband annoyed the hell outta me! Plus, she's 27 and said she met him in high school. Sooo, was he held back several times for each grade? Dude looked way older. 

[petalfrog]

I was pretty shocked that the husband's weight seemed to be so glossed over. I was waiting for Dr. Now to recommend WSL to him as well, but then wondered if that would even be ethical? Somewhat akin to ambulance chasing? If Ashley is the identified patient can the doctor legally/ethically also recommend a procedure he performs to a family member? If the husband is a truck driver at that weight, I fully expect him to have an aneurysm or stroke in the next few years. Sitting for hours on end (and likely smoking or not taking any needed medication) is terrible for the obese in terms of cardiovascular risk factors.

 

I found Ashley very sweet and thought this was a season 1 episode because she was mobile and not a big whiner (aka, not a total trainwreck like recent seasons). My boyfriend comments on how strong she must be to carry that weight around and also to be able to get herself from seated to standing. I missed the introduction... did she ever work or have any specific aspirations? Agreed the therapist was better this time... googled her and she has very legitimate credentials and excellent training. I also agree I didn't like the implication that Ashley had become a pain pill addict. First, if she was using opiates... people get garbage education about these from their doctors and pain pill addiction is shockingly common. I recently had a patient who had used his 2 month supply in three weeks because they were not working for him (after major spinal cord injury). He had little to no education on how tolerance and withdrawal worked in opiates to cause abuse. In addition, I have a friend with a Ph.D. who has spent the last 4 months weaning off her opiate pain med for a back injury because her doctors had maxed her out at the highest dose over the period of a year. Pain pill addiction weasels its way in and can even be inadvertently supported by medical providers. I referred him to an actual spinal cord pain clinic. Second, if she was using over the counter pills that is certainly not addiction... rather, she could have been taking just a little more than the usual dose and had an ulcer issue. I'm just glad she didn't have any liver failure.

[StatisticalOutlier]

On 2/18/2016 at 8:33 AM, Ocean Chick said:

I think a lot of the learned helplessness that leads them to say "we had to eat fast food because we had no other choice" is partly to do with not having to get out of the car, and partly because it IS fast.  These are people who don't have a lot of patience, and who are used to having what they want when they want it.  And if they decide they're hungry, they want their food NOW. 

I have a friend who makes nice dinners for himself every night.  Another friend and I talking were wondering why we don't do that.  This other friend said he doesn't think about food until he's hungry, and by then it's too late to make a nice dinner.  That's me, too.

The friend who makes dinner decides earlier in the day what he's going to have for dinner later, and shops for it if necessary.  I'll do that every once in a while because I have a hankering for something in particular that only I can make, but other than that, it's  "I'm hungry. I need something to eat."

I don't think it's learned helplessness for my friend and me.  That's just how we roll.  Fortunately, neither of us is fat so it works for us. 

 

On 2/18/2016 at 10:38 AM, raiderred1 said:

 I am not from East Texas as I grew up in North Texas but have lived in East Texas for about 13 years and most of the people out here are very uneducated and there is tons of white trash here.  The land and most of our area is gorgeous with very lush pastures and huge oak trees but the people definitely leave much to be desired.  I think most of the "People of Walmart" come from my area.

East Texas, a/k/a "Behind the Pine Curtain." 

And that son of a bitch who came up to her in the car and said, "I'll pray for you"?  WTF?  Maybe the cameras brought this on?  But mind your own fucking business, asshole.  Honestly.  Some people.

 

On 2/18/2016 at 10:52 AM, poeticlicensed said:

Most grocery stores and food manufacturers recognize that people are on the go more and don't have time to prep food from scratch, hence food items like pre-washed bagged salad, to go meals, tuna pouches, pre-slcied and washed fruit and veggies, individual containers of yogurt. It only takes a few minutes more to stop buy a store with a cooler and buy a few things for the road.I have a hard time believing that none of these people realize that you can buy nutritious food when you travel. Or for goodness sakes, pull off the highway and find a sit down restaurant. You need to get out of your car anyway to use the restroom and stretch, why not take an hour and have a decent meal at a sit down restaurant. Nothing grosses me out more than eating in a car. And the car takes on that food smell, and you just feel generally gross, esp with greasy food just sitting in your gut. Bottom line is that some people just love the burgers and fries and traveling is a convenient excuse (one of millions I'm sure) to eat the thing you want, not the thing that's good for you. 

It would cost a fortune for one of these people to feel sated with tuna pouches and pre-sliced fruit and vegetables.  Even a sit-down restaurant is a lot more expensive than fast food, and definitely not necessarily healthy.  And if I weighed a million pounds, I wouldn't want people to watch me eating in a restaurant, scrutinizing what I was having.  Or coming up to me to say they'll pray for me. 

I'm fine eating in the car.  I'm kind of known for my ability to eat a chili cheese dog from Wienerschnitzel while driving and not getting a speck on me.  It's a skill I learned in high school, during hours and hours of driving around aimlessly with friends. 

 

On 2/18/2016 at 0:02 PM, gunderda said:

That poor little kid put the clothes in the washer and when it was done he hopped INTO the washer to drag them out and then put them in the dryer. 

In the big debate over top-loader vs. front-loader washing machines, ease of access for five-year-olds has never been mentioned.  Untapped market.

 

On 2/18/2016 at 4:40 PM, ethalfrida said:

I didn't want to be wrong about this so I did research again. .. Subway is just as unhealthy as McDonald's. This information comes from studies at UCLA.

As always, it depends.  At Subway you can customize to have mustard instead of mayonnaise or salad dressing, which will make a big difference on any sandwich.   Or as the study showed, you can load up a sandwich with high-calorie stuff and make it very calorie dense.  Add regular chips and an unlimited refill soda, and there you are.

Jared was eating a turkey or vegetable sandwich with no cheese or mayo, baked chips, and a Diet Coke.  I'm not saying that's healthy, but it's low calorie.

At McDonald's, you can customize, but hardly anybody does.  I can't see someone saying, "Big Mac, hold the cheese and secret sauce," for example.  And people are going to eat the fries at McDonald's, period.

People who are trying to eat something with fewer calories will have an easier time of it at Subway than McDonald's.

[ethalfrida]

1 hour ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

I have a friend who makes nice dinners for himself every night.  Another friend and I talking were wondering why we don't do that.  This other friend said he doesn't think about food until he's hungry, and by then it's too late to make a nice dinner.  That's me, too.

The friend who makes dinner decides earlier in the day what he's going to have for dinner later, and shops for it if necessary.  I'll do that every once in a while because I have a hankering for something in particular that only I can make, but other than that, it's  "I'm hungry. I need something to eat."

I don't think it's learned helplessness for my friend and me.  That's just how we roll.  Fortunately, neither of us is fat so it works for us. 

 

East Texas, a/k/a "Behind the Pine Curtain." 

And that son of a bitch who came up to her in the car and said, "I'll pray for you"?  WTF?  Maybe the cameras brought this on?  But mind your own fucking business, asshole.  Honestly.  Some people.

 

It would cost a fortune for one of these people to feel sated with tuna pouches and pre-sliced fruit and vegetables.  Even a sit-down restaurant is a lot more expensive than fast food, and definitely not necessarily healthy.  And if I weighed a million pounds, I wouldn't want people to watch me eating in a restaurant, scrutinizing what I was having.  Or coming up to me to say they'll pray for me. 

I'm fine eating in the car.  I'm kind of known for my ability to eat a chili cheese dog from Wienerschnitzel while driving and not getting a speck on me.  It's a skill I learned in high school, during hours and hours of driving around aimlessly with friends. 

 

In the big debate over top-loader vs. front-loader washing machines, ease of access for five-year-olds has never been mentioned.  Untapped market.

 

As always, it depends.  At Subway you can customize to have mustard instead of mayonnaise or salad dressing, which will make a big difference on any sandwich.   Or as the study showed, you can load up a sandwich with high-calorie stuff and make it very calorie dense.  Add regular chips and an unlimited refill soda, and there you are.

Jared was eating a turkey or vegetable sandwich with no cheese or mayo, baked chips, and a Diet Coke.  I'm not saying that's healthy, but it's low calorie.

At McDonald's, you can customize, but hardly anybody does.  I can't see someone saying, "Big Mac, hold the cheese and secret sauce," for example.  And people are going to eat the fries at McDonald's, period.

People who are trying to eat something with fewer calories will have an easier time of it at Subway than McDonald's.

But at McDonald;s you can say "no salt" and they will cook you a fresh one without salt. My cousin used to do that because of her HBP.

[StatisticalOutlier]

I think the least of these people's problems is salt, though.

[ethalfrida]

1 minute ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

I think the least of these people's problems is salt, though.

I was just saying that custom orders at McD's is possible and does happen. The salt was just an example. But, other than that, I understand what you were saying.

[StatisticalOutlier]

Years ago I used to eat the Filet-O-Fish at McDonald's, but don't like tartar sauce so I would have them make one without it.  Definitely healthier than one with tartar sauce (although there's nothing healthy about it AT ALL), but I did it only because that's the way I like it.  It would never occur to me to do it to make it healthier.  And I think most people who are eating at McDonald's are doing so because they like it just the way it is.

At least at Subway a person has to tell the sandwich artist (!) each item he wants on there. 

We talk about ignorance when it comes to nutrition, but it really is tricky and most of the people I see on the show don't seem to be either highly intelligent or highly educated.  Take breakfast at McDonald's.  I like a biscuit and sausage.  I just looked at the nutritional information and found out it has 50% more calories than an Egg McMuffin.  I'm surprised. 

Same thing happened with scones.  How can something that dry be so full of fat? 

Even if a person were to try to think about what he eats (which people on this show obviously don't do), it can be counter-intuitive.  Or nuanced (orange juice is good because it's fruit, right?).  The deck is stacked against them.

[Chalby]

On February 17, 2016 at 11:52 PM, Noirprncess said:

I feel bad for the little boy who seems to live a life of indentured servitude. What will she do when he goes to school all day?

Her husband is going to house bound soon if he gains any more weight.

That's the part that broke my heart. Clearly her husband is not concerned that his son is forced to do all of his wife's 'duties' (assuming they each have defined contributions to the household). Maybe these two would have woken up if Social Services threatened to apprehend their child due to neglect.

[Chalby]

On June 17, 2016 at 10:57 AM, ethalfrida said:

Sorry Ethalfrida, but my computer wouldn't respond to statisticaloutlier

Statisticaloutlier said: "And that son of a bitch who came up to her in the car and said, "I'll pray for you"?  WTF?  Maybe the cameras brought this on?  But mind your own fucking business, asshole.  Honestly.  Some people.

I have to respond because I understood that he was questioning the camera crew, etc. and was told that she was going to be on the show. The only part we got to see was him telling her, "You can do it. I believe in you and I will pray for you. God bless you". I thought he was kind and supportive, and I was very annoyed when she whined to her husband that her parking lot experience 'sucked". Seriously, she should have just said 'thank you for your prayers', rather than go on about people looking at her.

[StatisticalOutlier]

I didn't see him questioning the camera crew, but even if that's the case, people should just mind their own business unless there's something actionable going on.  I'm sure she gets stared at all. the. time.  Yes, she agreed to be on TV, but if that's in exchange for getting her surgery paid for, then I think the humiliation of the TV appearance is enough and doesn't need to be added to by the peanut gallery offering their prayers.  Maybe she's not interested in any "help" from whatever god made her so fat in the first place, or the man's implication that she's not praying enough to fix this situation on her own.  MYOB.

Than again, I wouldn't put it past reality TV to ask random passersby what they think of the fat person squeezed into the truck, which might be even worse.  But again, MYOB.  You don't have to take that bait.

[Yolo]

On Fri Feb 19 2016 at 11:56 AM, NYCFree said:

I applaud Ashley for a really great start.

That said, I noticed that pre-surgery, they did show one meal that Ashley cooked when her truck-driving husband was home. She used a chair with wheels to sit in front of the stove and made something that looked like pork chops. I thought it odd that she can cook for her husband, but the pre-schooler had to cook for her.

That's what made me mad! Not only That, the little one did the laundry and cooked the hot dogs, but when the husbands home she cooks. Wth!?

[lenny]

On 8/25/2016 at 11:31 PM, Chalby said:

That's the part that broke my heart. Clearly her husband is not concerned that his son is forced to do all of his wife's 'duties' (assuming they each have defined contributions to the household). Maybe these two would have woken up if Social Services threatened to apprehend their child due to neglect.

It's sad but probably not, they would have said it was all someone else's fault they lost their child. This was the saddest episode I've seen because of the five year old. Its good for kids to learn some responsibility early on but to expect this of him must be considered abuse. No one should have children for what the child can do for them whether it's to fill emotional needs or to fill the role of live in help. The only valid reason to have kids is what we could do to enrich a child's life not the other way around.

[lenny]

On 2/17/2016 at 10:21 PM, Armchair Critic said:

 

I resented it back then but now I am grateful that my parents (especially my mother) watched closely what I ate. I have always had a tendency to be heavy and I would have been a lot bigger when I was young if they would have let me eat whatever I wanted.

We had terrible diets as kids. Lots of fast food and carbs. OMG, I remember being about 5 and sitting down in front of my mother with the sugar bowl and a spoon and eating all the sugar with nothing said about it. Needless to say, I was a chubby kid. I am not a stick thin adult but I have never approached 200 lbs. Yes, it's easier if we were taught healthy nutrition as children but once grown we make our own choices. "Choice" is a word addicts of any kind don't understand. "I was so upset I HAD to eat something" . No, you chose to eat. Their breakthroughs all seem to come after they learn the difference between what they had to do over what they chose to do.

[OoogleEyes]

There are a lot of Ashleys on this show.

Are they going to weigh the husband, too?