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Love in the Time of Walkers: Relationships in The Walking Dead


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Maybe he had planned to starve him like the Cheesemaker did to that guy who killed his family.

If true, then Morgan truly is an idiot...Why treat the infection / wound? Wasting medicine, supplies etc...

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As some people have said upthread, I think they might be trying to pair Rosita up with Spencer (supposedly the actor, useless as he is, is a semi-well known name who starred in "One Tree Hill") so I think he may survive awhile. Poor Rosita! And poor Sasha for getting stuck with pudgy Abraham after the sex on a stick that was Bob. I like Michael Cudlitz as an actor but let's face it, he ain't no looker, especially as Abraham.

I love Denise with Tara, they are such a cute couple, so I hope Denise escapes from the evil clutches of the basement wolf and gets to reunite with Tara at some point later in the season.

Morgan and Carol? Just no! I think Carol needs a nice yummy man like Tobin to rock her world, not some wannabe Karate Kid.

Edited by Mattipoo
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I actually think Cudlitz (in real life, without the orange hair) is really cute. And funny as well. When he appeared on TTD last season, or end of season 4, I was very into him. But the character of Abraham isn't quite as attractive. It's not just the cartoon hair and penchant for wife beaters, but the way he rambles on in such a nonsensical way is just maddening.

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I actually think Cudlitz (in real life, without the orange hair) is really cute. And funny as well. When he appeared on TTD last season, or end of season 4, I was very into him. But the character of Abraham isn't quite as attractive. It's not just the cartoon hair and penchant for wife beaters, but the way he rambles on in such a nonsensical way is just maddening.

 

Here's a shot of Michael Cudlitz sans the Red. MC

 

Yup, I agree. Yum.

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Now see?  I just don't get Tobin being thought of as yummy.  Interesting how very different peoples' tastes are.  Spencer is yummy, but he's also a piece of scum, so Rosita can do MUCH better.  MC in real life is kinda dishy, but the Abe makeup makes him look like he was rode hard and put away wet.  No thanks.

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Honestly, I haven't found any of the men on TWD to be all that attractive.  In the past, I would have taken Shane over Rick.  Now, I would take Father Pee Pants over any of the rest.    

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The actor who plays FPP is indeed a cool drink of water, but I imagine the character of Gabriel would yelp and run away and pee if you tried to touch his bathing suit area. I think it's between Daryl and Rick (BOTH SHOWERED OR NO DEAL) for quality bedroom sexytime experiences. Glenn seems like he might be a bit too gentle, but hey, maybe he's a freak in the sheets.

 

This is what I think about. 

Edited by The Mighty Peanut
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The actor who plays FPP is indeed a cool drink of water, but I imagine the character of Gabriel would yelp and run away and pee if you tried to touch his bathing suit area.

 

Should I be worried at how much I laughed at this? :)

 

 

I think it's between Daryl and Rick (BOTH SHOWERED OR NO DEAL) for quality bedroom sexytime experiences. Glenn seems like he might be a bit too gentle, but hey, maybe he's a freak in the sheets.

 

I think Daryl would take a little work before he'd be capable of quality sheet time, but MMV.

 

With a little training, I can't help but think that Eugene could be a dynamo though. His personality seems very dogged, so if he's been set to a task, I'm pretty sure he'd take direction very well and keep at it until things reached a...ahem...satisfactory conclusion. ;)

 

Holy God, have I really typed up a post about fictional characters' potential sexual prowess? *reviews post* Yes, yes I did. Yikes!

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Oh ugh.  Now you made me think about Eugene's "bathing suit" area.  There's not enough brain bleach in the world to cleanse that.  I prefer to think of him as a Ken doll - dolphin smooth down there.  Everything dolphin smooth....  No dangly bits at all.

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Ya'll are going to get me in trouble.  I just check out this forum once in a while and now people are giving me strange looks as I try not to bust out laughing.

 

All this talk about dolphin smooth bathing suit areas made me realize that CDB is really made up of some lovable, but quite strange group of men.  all the guys are pretty weird (I include Darryl in this group) and I have a feeling it is not just surviving a zombie apocalypse that did this to them.  I would imagine some of these guys were odd from the go.

 

Now, it makes more sense about why you do not see more romance with this group.

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Holy God, have I really typed up a post about fictional characters' potential sexual prowess? *reviews post* Yes, yes I did. Yikes!

 

OMG you guys...We don't have any porn tags in here!! *grin*

 

Annnnnd... we've devolved into fanfic-dom.  Thanks a hell of a lot, yall.

 

Do I need to create a fan-fic thread too? If any of you happen to write fan-fic, please I implore you, make sure your subjects take a shower and brush their teeth first, plzkthx....

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OMG you guys...We don't have any porn tags in here!! *grin*

 

 

Do I need to create a fan-fic thread too? If any of you happen to write fan-fic, please I implore you, make sure your subjects take a shower and brush their teeth first, plzkthx....

 

I guess that means no fan-fic involving our Wolfie then, eh?  He needs more help than a mere shower and toothbrush can provide, methinks.

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Should I be worried at how much I laughed at this? :)

 

I think Daryl would take a little work before he'd be capable of quality sheet time, but MMV.

 

With a little training, I can't help but think that Eugene could be a dynamo though. His personality seems very dogged, so if he's been set to a task, I'm pretty sure he'd take direction very well and keep at it until things reached a...ahem...satisfactory conclusion. ;)

 

Holy God, have I really typed up a post about fictional characters' potential sexual prowess? *reviews post* Yes, yes I did. Yikes!

 

Well, if we're going there, if I had to guess...

 

Gabriel: He is hot, and guilty repression is hot. Don't lie, you know it's true. He's the most likely of any of these guys to be kinky. The sex would be hot, but you'd have to put up with a lot of whining afterwards and handwringing about how sinful it was, how he succumbed to a moment of weakness, blah blah blah. Not worth it.

 

Eugene: Diligent when he applies himself to a task, and willing to educate himself: good. Certain positions would probably tire him out pretty quickly (missionary, up against the wall, etc.) Being a big nerd, he's the second-most likely of the bunch to be into kinky shit, after Gabriel. I could see him getting frustrated when the sexual techniques he'd been "reliably informed" would work didn't work because every woman is different, as opposed to a video game where the same button combination unlocks the next level every time. In terms of getting a partner, like many love-starved nerds, if he wants to get some loving, Eugene needs to punch at his weight. After sex, he would either go Stage 5 Clinger or get a swelled head, ditch his partner, and try to bag himself someone way out of his league. Could go either way. (My observation has been that supersmart nerds like Eugene are either the sweetest, most caring, most devoted boyfriends/girlfriends ever--like, marry them immediately or you will regret it for the rest of your days--or the wooooooooooooorst. There doesn't seem to be much middle ground.)

 

Glenn: Sweet, gentle, tender, probably not super passionate. If I had to guess...Likes his partner on top. Occasionally cries during sex. Gives amazing oral. Always makes sure his partner orgasms.

 

Rick: Boring as shit. Missionary or GTFO.

 

Daryl: ....Still can't see him as sexual, sorry. Just don't see it. Assuming he is not asexual, though, he also seems like a submissive type who would need a lot of booze and encouragement to act on any attraction. Probably disturbingly quiet during sex and loath to talk about sex at all. Since I think communication is important for good sex, I think all in all his lack of willingness to talk about it, coupled with what I'm assuming is a lack of experience, would probably make for a terrible lover.

 

Morgan: He's the guy who talks constantly throughout and who checks in every 30 seconds to see how you're doing.

 

The Wolf: He's crazy, so the sex would be amazing, but you'd have to kill him afterwards, so...

Edited by Eyes High
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(My observation has been that supersmart nerds like Eugene...

This is the only part I disagree with...He is a poseur and fraudulent nerd, not even close to Wolowitz / Cooper. You would get a poor quality - e.g. VHS to DVD transfer- version of Abe in the skills department...

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Eugene: Diligent when he applies himself to a task, and willing to educate himself: good. Certain positions would probably tire him out pretty quickly (missionary, up against the wall, etc.) Being a big nerd, he's the second-most likely of the bunch to be into kinky shit, after Gabriel. I could see him getting frustrated when the sexual techniques he'd been "reliably informed" would work didn't work because every woman is different, as opposed to a video game where the same button combination unlocks the next level every time. In terms of getting a partner, like many love-starved nerds, if he wants to get some loving, Eugene needs to punch at his weight. ..

 

The sex vs video game comparison re: technique? Priceless. Reminds me of a tumblr post I saw where someone assessed Thor and Loki's skills as lovers based on a scene in which they are trying to make an alien craft work. Loki was all "gently press the button" and Thor is yelling "I AM PRESSING IT" (while hammering it hard). I nearly died laughing.

 

However, your point about Eugene's weight makes me question how he's still that size over a year into the ZA. As I recall, he hasn't had a sweet set up, with limitless food and downtime. All his walking around with minimal food would normally result in dropped pounds, no?

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The Wolf: He's crazy, so the sex would be amazing, but you'd have to kill him afterwards, so...

 

 

I agreed with all your post except this one.  Since the wolf is an unapologetic sadist...he would be into things that would scare the heck out of me.  Things that would probably make you shudder besides his teeth.

Edited by qtpye
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If they weren't already dead,

I wouldn't mind Tyreese making sweet love to me while crooning "I've got you under my skin" in his soft velvety teddy bear voice.

Bob was just sex on a stick. I would love to find out what he was keeping inside his bag.

Merle. Now that's a real manly man. Only a real woman can handle him.

Dale. Silver fox. He can diddle me while I look into his judge-y bugged out eyes and swoon.

Edited by Mattipoo
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Re dead men:

 

The only dead one I would have wanted is Shane.

 

Tyreese wouldn't have been able to handle good sex.  He would have followed me around afterwards and made me climb up a tree, then he would have stood below and treed me like a dog.  

 

Bob, Dale and Merle:  can stay dead.

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What the hell is going on in here?? But I can dig it.

 

If they weren't already dead,

 

For me? The Governor (*dodges thrown tomatoes*) Yeah, I know, but I don't care. He might even kill me later, but I don't even care about that. It would be worth it. I'm not even sorry. So there.

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However, your point about Eugene's weight makes me question how he's still that size over a year into the ZA. As I recall, he hasn't had a sweet set up, with limitless food and downtime. All his walking around with minimal food would normally result in dropped pounds, no?

He must be related to Hurley.
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Shane is hot and perfect for some tear-off-the-clothes wild passionate sex, but I will need to put him back in his cage after the deed is done.

The governor is another hottie, eyepatch and all, but I know I will lose any arousal I have for him if we had to make love anywhere near his fish tank of Walker heads.

Edited by Mattipoo
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The governor is another hottie, eyepatch and all, but I know I will lose any arousal...if 

Gov: Oh that noise....my daughter plays with heavy toys...don't freak out if she walks in on us...just that curious age....

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What the hell is going on in here?? But I can dig it.

 

For me? The Governor (*dodges thrown tomatoes*) Yeah, I know, but I don't care. He might even kill me later, but I don't even care about that. It would be worth it. I'm not even sorry. So there.

So I guess a good pick up line to use on you would go something like, "You are not one of those women who prematurely uses their safe word?"

Edited by Watcher0363
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For me? The Governor (*dodges thrown tomatoes*) Yeah, I know, but I don't care. He might even kill me later, but I don't even care about that.

 

Walking Dead: SVU

 

Stabler: This vic has obvious signs of bondage...and bites??!!

Briscoe: That's why I called you for this crossover...she wanted all 50 Shades of Dead.

[Dun Dun]

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Walking Dead: SVU

 

Stabler: This vic has obvious signs of bondage...and bites??!!

Briscoe: That's why I called you for this crossover...she wanted all 50 Shades of Dead.

[Dun Dun]

Olivia: Panties around her ankles, rotting corpse makeup, handcuffed to a dentist chair.

Stabler: I've seen this, right out of the Walking Dead.

Lenny: The panties around the ankles makes it yours, as for the rest of it. No more walking for her, now she is just dead.

[Dun Dun]

Edited by Watcher0363
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Stabler, Briscoe, etc. - I have no idea what you guys are talking about but this stuff is funny as hell.

 

I think it would be even funnier if you knew the references - they are characters from Law & Order and Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. That's why the references to the panties - i.e. indications that it's their kind of case (Olivia and Stabler are the SVU detectives) and Lenny Briscoe (played by the wonderful Jerry Orbach, RIP) generally cracks the sarcastic one liner.

Edited by AwesomO4000
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Thanks guys! I'll take a look. A good laugh is always welcome.

 

Maybe I'm missing out by not watching TV...

Well Law and Order is very good, as for Law and Order:SVU. I can only describe it as someone once described the Walking Dead. It is sorrow porn, with an added undercurrent of all men are pigs.

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Well Law and Order is very good, as for Law and Order:SVU. I can only describe it as someone once described the Walking Dead. It is sorrow porn, with an added undercurrent of all men are pigs.

 

... with the occasional Munch for amusing relief - I love me some John Munch. (Loved the character, too, in Homicide: Life on the Streets - potentially more sorrow porn, but I still loved it.)

 

And then there is Law & Order: Criminal Intent... which for me is almost all about Vincent D'Onofrio and his, for me, fascinating portrayal of Det. Robert Goren as some sort of brilliant, affected, disturbed, obsessive, and somewhat creepy Columbo.

 

As with The Walking Dead, for me it's all about the characters... and L&O verse has some interesting ones. And unlike some other proceedural shows, the relationships between the characters are important and often very complex. The detective partners can have very intense relationships that can be at the same time supportive in some ways and destructive in others. With SVU especially there are parallels with The Walking Dead in this way. The detectives see way too much and they are exposed to a lot of ugly and quick decisions have to be made which can lead to mistakes and friction - which takes a toll on them and their relationships. That friction between Carl and Rick, for example, over what happened at the prison... Elliot Stabler and Olivia Benson had a similar friction over a decision where a child ended up being killed, because Elliot stopped to make sure Olivia was okay first, getting to the child too late. They had to work through the blame and guilt... Elliot's misplaced anger with Olivia (he blamed her for making him stop to check on her) reminded me of Carl's anger towards Rick. Both had to work through it and realize that it was their problem not their Dad/Olivia's, and in both cases that process was a little rough and somewhat ugly.

 

It kind of makes sense... the sorrow porn comparison by Watcher0363 is apt. SVU is the show of the three where the detectives see the ugliest and most affecting cases, and are more apt to come through with mental scars. It's also the show where the main detectives are most dependent on each other - for better or for worse (or more often both) - because of it. For me there was one exchange that described the Olivia/Elliot relationship in a nutshell...

 

After a case where they were looking for a parent because a kidney was needed (it was complex, I don't remember the details, but it involved blood types)...

Olivia: Love's a bitch.

Elliot: Tell me about it.

Olivia: You know, we've been partners all these years. I don't even know your blood type.

Elliot: A-postiive.

Olivia: How 'bout that? Me too.

Elliot: [both enter the elevator and turn to face forward] I'd give you a kidney.

Olivia (wryly): Not if I gave you mine first.

 

It's probably just me, but that reminds me of Rick and Carl's relationship. (Except for the blood type part.)

Edited by AwesomO4000
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No wonder Rick is so messed up mentally most the time.  Finally introduce a strong candidate as a LI for him - after however many months that Lori died, then her ghost stopped visiting to lead him on field trips outside the safety of structures - only for him to have to watch from a front-row seat as she and her kid get turned into a late-night buffet for walkers, and the other kid short-sights his own child.

 

 

My own head-canon likes the turn of events a bit, though... Sasha or Rosita are my Rick-centric choices, even though I'm 99.99% sure neither will ever happen on the show.

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Yeah, Rick's not going to be romancing the ladies anytime soon. He's going to be irrationally guilty guy for awhile over not sensing the danger Porchdick family posed to Coral. Although it would play better if his children's survival and his new sense of civilization building simply pushed all thoughts of the Porchdick family experience out of his head. 

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