S02.E07: Happy New Year

[Janet Snakehole]

I have to defend Jessica a bit on the waiting to see what Ryan wants for dinner. He seems like the type of person who is very particular about what he wants, and as mentioned above, most likely watches his diet quite a bit. He probably does eat a high protein low carb diet. If he were the type to eat out all the time too, and to continue to want to, that to me says he won't really compromise on what he eats. I bet if Jessica were to make something, he would criticize it.

Now she could actually SAY something to him, but apparently 100 dollars borrowed is what it takes for her to speak up.

Edited April 29, 2015 by Janet Snakehole

[sookisooki]

Sean's "weirdness" is something many people are projecting on to him because they find him "creepy". The actual facts are that he said he would be fine with moving and then he backtracked on it. Something the experts can't predict. This is the main issue at hand right now (not the only one obviously). And with Jessica, she and the experts have made it clear that she asked for a tough, take charge kind of guy. That's what she was attracted to do. We have literally heard this dozens of times on air. She got what he asked for and she doesn't like it. Again, not the experts fault.

 

And that's life. You can think you want this that and the other, But, the reality of those choices may be something you truly do not want. The people making the matches can only go by so much. Being dishonest in your application is not going to help you get the match you want.

But isn't that where an "expert" comes in?  You have to be able to read between the lines of what someone says and what someone really needs! If I say I want Brad Pitt, will you actually go to Angelina and say, "Sorry, there's this girl somewhere, USA who wants your man. We'll bring him back when we're done with him."??

 

I wouldn't go to a therapist and pay them 100 dollars an hour to just nod their head and agree with all the stuff I'm thinking. I need their insight, wisdom, direction, etc.

[fabdarling]

Why do I watch this show? I'm just angry afterwards!!

I am finding Jessica more annoying than Ryan. At least in this last episode we kind of know why he acts that way....it's not right, but at least we understand. He needs a strong woman.

Jessica's attitude would drive me up a wall too!!

Sean and Davina....Marriage Time of Death....2 Days into Honeymoon.

Jac and Ryan.....Our only hope left in this show. May the odds be ever in your favor.

[Booger666]

Regarding the $100 from the wedding money, I swear I heard Ryan D say "you took $30", meaning it was OK for both of them to borrow and settle up later. Did anyone else hear that? If true, I get his problem with her. It isn't right to complain about him doing the exact same thing she did. And the way he said it made me wonder if she took the money first because she look suprised and immediately turned it back on him instead of explaining her actions. I get the impression she's trying to make sure the drama gets on camera (making Ryan D look bad in the process) and he is trying to keep the drama off camera and just acknowledge there are problems on camera.

[humbleopinion]

Next door to Russo's is KIKU Sushi.

On the other side of Russo's is an animal hospital.

 

A wider shot on street view will show the 3 businesses.

[Minney]

Regardless of Sean's issues, and he has MANY, I could never tolerate Davina's me me me attitude.  How many needs/wants did she lay down?  Then proceeds to arrange the whole NYE to her liking?  There is no compromise going on in their relationship and even a sane person would check out.  She needs a little purse dog with a collar and leash, not a husband. 

 

I don't think Ryan is as into Jaclyn as she is into him.  He is the straight line and she zigzags back and forth hopefully they end at the same point.

 

Ryan and Jessica?  Just no.

 

Last season the couples had more interaction and meetings each week with an "expert".  This season is sadly missing that component and it is obvious by how off track the couples seem to be.

[Liberty]

... I swear I heard Ryan D say "you took $30", meaning it was OK for both of them to borrow and settle up later. Did anyone else hear that?...

Oh I heard it all right!

 

The editors/directors did a good job pointing out at this point all three couples had been married around 17 or 18 days.  I think I've spent more than 18 days reading posts on this board!  

 

It's a short time to undergo such a radical change in lifestyle.

[Snarklepuss]

Speaking of "did I hear"? - Did I hear Davina say in this episode that at some point that she does want to move to a suburb like New Jersey and have kids?  Later on when I remembered this, I thought maybe I'd dreamed it.  How does this square with  her attitude about not even wanting to live in another part of Manhattan let alone anywhere off the island?  Is there some kind of master time plan she has going on in her head about when she wants to live in NY and when she wants to move out?  I'm thinking she hasn't gotten her 15 minutes of Manhattan out of her system yet, but maybe she realizes it's not forever.  The thing is, the show didn't let the audience know this until now.  I'm not sure whether Sean himself knew this until now and what that would mean if he did.

 

Oh and BTW, I did hear Ryan mention the $30 Jessica took.

[JapMo]

 

What is wrong with ironing on the bed? Why should she iron on that cheap table? So that the table's finish melts onto her clothes?

 

This is the kind of thing a wife needs to tell her husband to butt out of (unless he wants to do the ironing). I iron on the bed all the time. I iron on the floor too. I have an ironing board but I don't want to drag it out for small jobs. As long as you have a thick towel to cover the heat, there's nothing wrong with it. I'm not sure if Ryan thought it was a fire hazard or what. But it's just one of those little things between newlyweds that happens.

 

I said it last week, I'll say it again - Jessica wants everything to come to her.  She is unwilling to make any effort.  My mother would say she is going into this with her ass.  She is so focused on trying to find fault with Ryan that she invents things in order to make him the villain and herself the victim.  I believe him that he would not "steal" the money.  He was probably short on cash and borrowed it.  She assumed he took it and didn't intend to give it back.  Why would he need to take any money?  He makes plenty of money.  She really needs to get a grip.  I get it that the situation is causing them inordinate stress but man, her issues go way beyond that.  And BTW, Mr. Snarklepuss can act that way about things like ironing on the bed - I just tell him to go stuff it.  Don't sweat the small stuff.  Ryan can be a bit intrusive but I would probably act like his grandmother and just tell him to go blow.  He'd probably love it and just back off.

 

Not only is she trying to make him the villian, Snarklepuss, but so is the show. Did you notice how little they were on the entire episode until the end? It was all Sean & Davina and Ryan & Jaclyn, until the very end. Ryan D. is a business consultant, right? I sure wouldn't want my clients to see me in such a bad light. I'm not saying he isn't at fault on some of this, but it seems since Day 1 the show has been trying to put him in the worst possible light.

[JapMo]

 

I've come to the conclusion that Sean is a very small man, in several ways. I'm detecting a highly disingenuous person. He is always "on," in that I feel he's performing, speaking to, playing for the camera AND the crew.

His "reality show" ambitions and proclivities were nicely illustrated at their New Years Eve dinner, when Sean proclaimed to Davina, "will you accept this rose?" With quite a flourish, too. Oh, and I've had MORE than enough of a grown man with gray hair bemoaning his childhood bullying. We are all products of our experiences and I'm sensitive to that fact. In this venue, to me, Sean comes across as an excuse-maker, crybaby, attention glutton. Jessica and Ryan D are both too immature and self-centered for marriage. They can't communicate because neither one truly listens to the other. Each person may be hearing but neither is listening. I did find it interesting tonight that when Ryan D once again invoked his perception of his grandparents' PERFECT relationship, he used the example of papa yelling, "just do it and shut up!" To grams! Ha! I'm getting more and more uncomfortable observing the golden couple of Jaclyn and RyanR. She does remind me of the new Jamie Otis in her efforts to portray her true love and happiness. Something or everything seems forced and camera-ready.

 

So agree about Sean, and I've been trying to find the right word but you hit it...disengenuous. It's like he's reading from a textbook on "How To Bullshit You're Way Through Anything". He's sooooooo in tune with his emotions...soooooo willing to accept his faults and sooooo understanding of everyone else. Blech. Give me a good old fashioned fight anytime over this CONSTANT talking. That's all D&S and JacRy did last night. Talk, talk, talk about either how they are going to work on themselves and fix everything or how happy happy happy they are. If I hear the term "friend-zone" one more time I'm going to punch both Jaclyn and Ryan. Man, that got annoying. I am beginning to truly dislike RyanR. To me he is so boring. There is nothing interesting about him.

[Snarklepuss]

Not only is she trying to make him the villian, Snarklepuss, but so is the show. Did you notice how little they were on the entire episode until the end? It was all Sean & Davina and Ryan & Jaclyn, until the very end. Ryan D. is a business consultant, right? I sure wouldn't want my clients to see me in such a bad light. I'm not saying he isn't at fault on some of this, but it seems since Day 1 the show has been trying to put him in the worst possible light.

 

I totally agree.  I almost think the show is feeding Jessica extra money to start in on him and keep pressing his buttons until he storms out.

[PityFree]

Davina's selfishness came through (or at east the editors made it come through the way they wanted) when she TOLD Sean what their plans were for NYE. Not asked, not discussed, TOLD.

[Janet Snakehole]

Speaking of "did I hear"? - Did I hear Davina say in this episode that at some point that she does want to move to a suburb like New Jersey and have kids? Later on when I remembered this, I thought maybe I'd dreamed it. How does this square with her attitude about not even wanting to live in another part of Manhattan let alone anywhere off the island? Is there some kind of master time plan she has going on in her head about when she wants to live in NY and when she wants to move out? I'm thinking she hasn't gotten her 15 minutes of Manhattan out of her system yet, but maybe she realizes it's not forever. The thing is, the show didn't let the audience know this until now. I'm not sure whether Sean himself knew this until now and what that would mean if he did.

Oh and BTW, I did hear Ryan mention the $30 Jessica took.

This definitely happened, as did the $30 comment. I think your theory of needing 15 minutes in Manhattan is right. I don't live in a city, let alone Manhattan, but I have heard others say that once they have kids, they want to move to the suburbs. I still don't like Davina a whole lot, but this does show to me that she is able to compromise a bit.

Speaking of kids, I kind of felt bad for nice Ryan (I forget the last initials, so he will henceforth be known to me as nice Ryan) when Jaclyn was setting a timeline for kids. I get that for women it is different, and there is a bit of a deadline, but Jaclyn needs to realize that they are not a normal couple. Ryan is right that they need time to grow as a couple. I also thought it was a bit inappropriate to be having that discussion in front of all of her friends.

Edited April 29, 2015 by Janet Snakehole

[Snarklepuss]

I suspect that Ryan doesn't do many carbs. Obviously his fitness regime is stricter than hers is. Did you notice, I think in the preview for next week, his breakfast of peanut butter and banana instead of toast or waffles or pancakes or cereal.

 

Maybe, but if he wanted low carb, eating those huge dragon rolls full of rice is not the way to do it.

[MsPH]

I think Ryan and Jaclyn are adorable. I don't think she's trying to force anything, that's just how she is when she's falling in love. Ryan doesn't seem like the type to be into PDA, so he looks a bit uncomfortable when she's all over him in front of the cameras and other people. I also suspect he's a bit freaked out about the 180, especially since they still have a lot to figure out if they want their marriage to work out in the long term. He's living way too far away from his family right now and I think it's weighing on him. Jaclyn seems better at living in the moment. I hope they work things out though, because I think they're both genuinely good people and they see that in each other. That's how you're supposed to view your spouse, like they're one in a million. Not like they're someone who you're willing to tolerate because you don't want to be alone.

 

Jessica and Ryan D are so awful together. They both annoy me in different ways. I get why she's probably scared to cook for him. I mean he looks pretty permanently annoyed by anything she does, and he seems like a fussy eater, so the chances are he's gonna find fault in whatever she makes for him. I think they could plan out their meals the day before though, so she knows what he wants and can make it for him before he gets back. I would be annoyed too, if I came home starving and I still had to have a big discussion about what to eat and then wait for it to be prepared. But as much as he complains about Jessica's lack of communication, he doesn't seem that good at it either. Instead of nicely bringing up the cooking thing, he's like "let's have sushi again" and she's left thinking that's what he wants to eat, while he looks irritated the rest of the night. I just get the feeling he thinks he's better than her. The whole ironing fight was beyond ridiculous. Ironing boards have padding for a reason. Like the bed! An IKEA table does not. I hate when people are being illogical and then try to force their bad logic on other people. It's infuriating. I wish she had just told him to STFU and explained why she's using the bed. Him being nostalgic about his grandpa yelling at and belittling his grandma made me want to smack him. That's is NOT how people are supposed to treat each other. Yeah, they might end up doing it years down the line, but it's still not something to emulate. 

 

I don't appreciate her passive-aggressive behaviour either though. The whole fight in the kitchen was so strange. I didn't really like how he brought up the lack of home-cooked meals. It was kind of like he was saying "yeah, the kitchen's always clean because you never cook for me". I didn't think it was worth getting that offended by or starting to yell though. She says she has nothing to say and then starts yelling because he doesn't let her speak. What? It just seemed like a lot of resentment bursting out at once. I'm not sure what was up with the $100 though. I think she said he took it because he was low on money, not sure if she meant cash or money in general, but I can believe it. I don't think he's nearly as rich as he wants viewers to think. I mean look at his own apartment! I think he's pretending to have more money than he does for the sake of the show and because the show is paying for their apartment during filming. I think Jess is in on it, so when she brought up him needing $100 dollars on camera, he freaked out, because he doesn't want people to know he's faking it.

 

Sean and Davina are both annoying too. I knew before the episode even aired that Sean would come back to a sulking complaining Davina. That's just not the way to make him want to stay. But he does need to stop blaming everything on bullying though, it's getting old. I get his reaction and anxiety, but then again it's only the start of the "experiment". They should focus on each other first and not all the problems. I don't know if I buy Davina's two-year plan though. I think they could get a nice house in Jersey for her apartment's current price, they don't need to wait two years. And what is Sean supposed to do during those two years? Sell his place, get a job in Manhattan and then get a new job again in two years? If he's trying to advance in his career then changing jobs every two years probably won't help. Commuting back and forth for two years won't work either. Not to mention Davina is gonna be 36 in two years. They might not even get pregnant once, let alone several times. I think it's hard for Sean to ignore all these issues. Not everyone can just shut off their analytical mind and go with the flow. Davina seems to have the same problem, so this is not gonna work at all.

[moonxyz]

Ryan totally got caught in a lie and freaked out. You can build trust with a stranger and go back on your word about how you will spend the money? Why take the money?  Jessica should have spoken about it when it happened and not into an unrelated discussion.  That comment was a payback  for all the shitty things he has done to her: from the honeymoon to the trashy comment. Kind of a low blow but I can’t say I wasn't amused given that Ryan is an asshole.

 

Davina and Sean continue to depress me. Davina continues to talk to Sean like he’s a child and he continues to be polite towards her. He not attempting to smash tells me he’s already checked out.

 

I see that the Jaclyn show is still in effect. Already gunning for the First year Spin off. You go girl! However their seemingly normal interactions are a reprieve from the dysfunction displayed in the other couples

Edited April 29, 2015 by moonxyz

[HumblePi]

*Disclaimer. This post is just 100% total snark, condemnation and criticism on my part. I'm flawed, no doubt about it. But I'm not on a television show where I willingly put myself up to being scrutinized and publicly judged.

 

I've seen comments from others about Ryan and his reaction to Jessica ironing on the bed. This was particularly disturbing to me, and I mean disturbing in a way that I wanted to iron Ryan's face and heat-seal his lips together. This is something so unimportant, so insignificant that any normal man wouldn't care that she was using the bed as a surface to iron on. He made a big deal out of it because he's the kind of man that wants to put a woman down and shame her for no good reason instead of wanting to bolster her self-esteem and make her feel good about herself. "Jess don't iron on a bed" "You're Ironing on a bed" "You're ironing on a bed? I mean, you don't iron on a bed!" "It's a bed and you're ironing on a bed!"  I counted EIGHT times that he said that. Again, as someone else mentioned, what the hell is so wrong about ironing on a bed? I mean if there are any cooties running around on the bed, the heat would kill them, right?  Will the mattress fall apart because you're ironing on the bed? Will the clothes suck up the pattern of the comforter on the bed and be ruined? He even brings up the 'ironing on the bed' debacle later on in the episode. I have so much intense dislike of Ryan (notice I didn't say hate) that all I can think of is ........

Davina is the second runner-up in my list. I can barely listen to her or watch her expressions. Her exaggerated wide-eye looks she gives to Sean just make her appear to be some kind of crazy person. And sorry but this is 2015, the technique for permanent laser removal of unwanted hair has been perfected, so why is anyone still wearing dark black sideburns? You can afford it, so go get that stuff removed. Oh, and stop playing the victim. On that note, her husband Sean's voice annoys the hell out of me. There are voice coaches that will help train your voice to lower a couple of octaves.

Next, Jaclyn and RyanR. I wish the 'experts' could take a shot at analyzing why Jaclyn seems to always be wearing black and white clothes and her entire apartment is decorated in black and white, devoid of any color. Even her clothes closet has no door but it has a black and white zebra scarf-thing covering the door opening. A real psychologist could probably analyze the reason for that. RyanR seems like a nice enough person but I get a sense that he always has morning breath. There, I said it.

Jessica is the least annoying to me even though I want to pick up a facial cleansing wipe and rub off some of that butterfly eyelash mascara.

 

I wish the director would use softer lighting on these scenes. I mean, where there's a serious discussion going on, feelings being discussed and tensions rising then there's these big bright lights shining in their faces, it takes away from the 'magic' of making the scenes believable. (oh I didn't notice that there's a camera, a few crew people and airport lighting in my face). It's like the lighting the police would use on a crime scene after dark. Sometimes I can even see the reflections of the bright lights on their foreheads. It lessens the believable factor.

 

*thanks for ironing out the way I messed up all their names

Edited April 30, 2015 by HumblePi

[Snarklepuss]

I see that the Jaclyn show is still in effect. Already gunning for the First year Spin off. You go girl! However their seemingly normal interactions are a reprieve from the dysfunction displayed in the other couples

 

I see Ryan and Jaclyn in a new sitcom spin off, "Everybody Loves Ryan and Jaclyn, the King and Queen of Queens".

[Liberty]

 

;;;  I almost think the show is feeding Jessica extra money ...

 

Any idea what the participants in this experiment are actually receiving as compensation?

[bourbon]

 

Sean's "weirdness" is something many people are projecting on to him because they find him "creepy". The actual facts are that he said he would be fine with moving and then he backtracked on it. Something the experts can't predict. This is the main issue at hand right now (not the only one obviously). And with Jessica, she and the experts have made it clear that she asked for a tough, take charge kind of guy. That's what she was attracted to do. We have literally heard this dozens of times on air. She got what he asked for and she doesn't like it. Again, not the experts fault.

 

Considering how many times the "experts" have answered the criticism that applicants can simply lie on their tests with the firm statement that these tests are designed to weed that sort of thing out, I would expect them to be able to predict this sort of thing to some extent. No matter how many times Jessica said in her tests or interviews that she wanted a take-charge kind of man, if she clearly has issues in her past relationships with being walked on, then it would seem fairly obvious that she doesn't *really* want or need a take-charge kind of guy. So, I do kind of think it is the experts' fault.

And don't get me started on the fact that the experts thought it was a good idea to match a couple, in part, based on the fact that they could bond over being bullied as kids. You can bond over the fact that you both like to ski. You can bond over the fact that you both are military brats or from Minnesota or play the oboe. Not over the fact you were bullied. Not to mention that if Sean is so closed off and held back by being bullied, he needs therapy, not a spouse to bond with over it.

[JapMo]

 

I think Jessica's and Ryan's communication styles are different.  Neither one is disrespectful or better or worse than the other.  I just think that for them given their state of maturity at this point, it might be too hard for them to learn to understand each other without always conflicting.  My husband and I worked it out but we loved each other first before we had to work it out.  They are under a very different set of circumstances, and one which I think will interfere with them working it out.

 

Where are the experts to guide them through this? Just a phone call away? I know it was New Years Eve, but Sean calling Dr. C on the phone was the first time we've seen ANY interaction between the couples and the experts, and I am positive they made house calls last year to each couple by this time. I think the first visit was by Dr. Pepper bringing the wedding photos. If they are doing it, fine...but I for one would like to see it. I enjoyed their interactions last season. And if any two people need help right now, it's Ryan and Jessica.

[JapMo]

 

Oh, how I love my realty tv show guilty pleasures. I enjoyed last season so much. I couldn't wait for each new episode. This season, though, I just don't know. It feels like several people got what they asked for and it's making them crazy. Jessica is just straight up miserable. And I can see that Ryan isn't the nicest, most cuddly teddy bear, but she was very vocal about wanting a take-charge type of guy. That's what she's got now. I don't like either of these two people as individuals and definitely not as a couple. Davina confuses me. Sean irritates me. I honestly feel like the experts decided that since they both had bullying in their past they'd be great together. No, they're not. I am in no way minimizing the heartache I'm sure they went through as kids/young adults, but they reside too much in the past. People with broken pasts don't necessarily fit into the pieces of someone's present. I want to believe that Jaclyn is being sincere because I genuinely like Ryan R, but I don't know. I feel like she wants to be this season's Jamie but she's not as vulnerable, open, or sensitive as Jamie was/is. I'm on the fence here. I want to be more invested like I was last season, but so far nothing has clicked.

Maybe Jessica should have been put with Ryan R.

Jaclyn might have worked with the other Ryan.

Davina and Sean need to work their way off my television.

I wonder how Sean managed to make it through casting with him having a fairly recent DUI?

NO....no one deserves a dullard like Ryan R. Regarding your statement of the DUI, is that against the rules for people trying out on reality shows? I didn't know that.

I LOVED your phrase "People with broken pasts don't necessarily fit into the pieces of someone's present." Can I borrow that some time? Lastly, I have to agree with you how much less interested I am in this season's pairings than last season. I don't know what it is, maybe just too much talk. Just live in the moment, for heaven's sake and quit dissecting every little think (I'm talking to you Sean & Davina).

[Wings]

 

Maybe, but if he wanted low carb, eating those huge dragon rolls full of rice is not the way to do it.

 

Yes and peanut butter and a banana for breakfast is better than a pile of pancakes but still high in carbs.   He is on regime of his design and it is working; he looks fit.   He does not strike me as a guy would like to sit down

 

Check out the spoiler thread.  It really does not contain the conclusion to this show but posts on another board from a co worker of Sean's and instagram gives us a closer look at things.  Nothing we don't already know, really.  

[kodachromerin]

If my husband said, "It'd be nice to get a home cooked meal around here", I'd hand him a spatula and tell him to go ahead. I hated the way Ryan phrased that, especially because I recall him saying something in the last episode about how they had money (his money) and didn't need to eat at home all the time to save cash. I agree that Jessica is insufferable, but he's just as bad. Neither of them seem like they'll be ready for a long term relationship any time soon. Ryan seems like a serial hook-up artist and Jessica is too annoying and boring to keep anyone interested.

I'm curious about what kind of guy would make Davina happy. She seems to fancy herself a Carrie Bradshaw type, but she's wound SO tight and her standards are impossible. I think a good partner will make you realize you aren't perfect and make you want to improve yourself. She thinks she's already perfect. Watching her and Sean makes my stomach turn.

[JapMo]

"Ryan seems like a nice enough person but I get a sense that he always has morning breath. There, I said it."

You said it, HumblePi, and I second it. It's that nasaly stuffed up way he talks that not only is so annoying (NYers, clue me in if this is the way everyone talks, because I'm from the Midwest and this is not the kind of accent I hear on TV or in the movies) but makes him sound unintelligent. There, I said it! I know that sounds horrible, but every time he speaks I want to go DUH.

[Primetimer]

It's New Year's Eve in Married At First Sightland, and the couples are finding new and creative trivialities to bicker about. Join us as we rank them from first to worst.

Read the story

[butterly17]

Sean seems super phony, like psychopathically phony.  Davina is needy and vocal, I think she needs a man who worships her, or she needs someone with enough money to keep her busy pampering herself, that he dosen't have to do it all the time.

 

Jessica holds back her thoughts until they explode into an argument, Ryan then writes her off as crazy, and walks away.  Ryan seems like he is probably deep down a nice guy, but a guy that probably needs to have it his way about 80% of the time.  He can't handle a conversation with Jessica, that has any kind of conflict.  Twice she has started to open up about things that have pissed her off, or hurt her... and both times he was ran out of the room and said he was done with her.  NOT GOOD.  Why would you ever be honest with someone that yells and leaves, when you fight?

 

Jac seems like that type of person to fall hard and fast, hopefully this will make her a little understanding when Ryan deals with the guilt of not being around to help his family.

[butterly17]

.... Oh... and what was Ragey Ryan yelling about Jessica having moved his sweatpants, and she yelled back about him moving a TV?1?!?

[MsPH]

I seen comments from others about Sean and his reaction to Jessica ironing on the bed. This was particularly disturbing to me, and I mean disturbing in a way that I wanted to iron Sean's face and heat-seal his lips together. This is something so unimportant, so insignificant that any normal man wouldn't care that she was using the bed as a surface to iron on. He made a big deal out of it because he's the kind of man that wants to put a woman down and shame her for no good reason instead of wanting to bolster her self-esteem and make her feel good about herself. "Jess don't on a bed" "You're Ironing on a bed" "You're ironing on a bed? I mean, you don't iron on a bed!" "It's a bed and you're ironing on a bed!"  I counted EIGHT times that he said that.

 

I know right? What the actual f*ck was that? He sounds mentally challenged sometimes (no offense to mentally challenged people). And then he also said "Are you gonna cry?" to Jess in a taunting manner, when she wasn't even close to tears. That's something a schoolyard bully would say to his victim, not something an adult says to his spouse. He is disturbing.

[ElectricCityy]

I know right? What the actual f*ck was that? He sounds mentally challenged sometimes (no offense to mentally challenged people). And then he also said "Are you gonna cry?" to Jess in a taunting manner, when she wasn't even close to tears. That's something a schoolyard bully would say to his victim, not something an adult says to his spouse. He is disturbing.

Yeah. He is scary. Shouldn't these "experts" be stepping in now. They had more of a presence at this point in S1 and those couples weren't nearly as dysfunctional. 

[SaucyMommy]

last night - wowsa.  I was so confused by the interaction between Ryan and Jessica. I'm pretty sure they don't even really like each other.

[Nancybeth]

I felt like Ryan D. was threatening to tell some big secret about Jessica or reveal something on camera that she didn't want revealed...the whole, "Oh you want to go there, let's not go there, you don't want me to say it." Admittedly it was kind of hard to sort the fight out and they were talking over each other, but it was weird.

And I hated HATED his "Are you gonna cry?" and making fun of her for it. He's a terrible person and I wish she was better at standing up to him. Jessica just gets SUPER passive-aggressive.

[JaneVM]

Ryan and Jessica will never make it unless she decides to remain a disrespected doormat for the rest of her life.  Yes, she is passive-aggressive and has trouble communicating but the fact is that Jessica is no challenge to Ryan. He does not respect her and views her as being beneath him.Imagine him being with a girl he was crazy about, he never would have flipped out over ironing on the bed!The foundation for their relationship is set and cannot be changed. Here she was in a relationship for 7 years without a commitment and it only ended when the guy cheated and to me that shows a level of low self-esteem.  I don't know any woman who would put up with  waiting that long for a  commitment who really wants to get married (and obviously she did considering she married a stranger).  Last night she made the comment something like "there were months I went without a date" which again doesn't help with Ryan thinking she's special. Sure it might be true but you don't SAY that! You'd never hear Ryan putting himself down.There's a reason why these people couldn't find spouses on their own and it shows.  I think Jessica should get some counseling and work on herself before being in any relationship.

 

Also, Ryan has too many issues to make him even remotely a good marriage candidate. He has a skewed view of what is a "good" marriage if he thinks it's normal for his grandfather to yell at his grandmother that way. Their relationship seems to have nothing but misery.

Edited April 29, 2015 by JaneVM

[Snewtsie]

Jessica bugs; such a whiner. Ryan D wants someone who will jokingly bicker with him. I get it.

DaNeeda and her list of 100 demands. News flash: It's Not All About You, Honey. Wipe that damn scowl off your face for a change.

It says a lot when people (me) who think Sean is a creepy, pathological liar are looking at her as the reason this isn't working. Ha!

[Jack Sampson]

Regarding Davina's 2 year plan - you're 34, sweetheart.  Realistically, you wouldn't be getting pregnant until 36-37, delivering 37-38, then trying for another kid before 40?  Come on, I know it's normal to be having kids later in life but the average age is still under 30.  The time for a 2 year plan was 8-10 years ago.

 

Also, can you imagine being around a pregnant Davina? 

[rlc]

Do they live in her apartment?  I thought they all had to relocate to neutral ground.   Where in NYC is not subway accessible?  She said she lived on the upper east side.

They never showed them agreeing on a new apartment, did they? I believe they are either in her apartment, or within her neighborhood. The 2nd avenue subway line is currently under construction, so I'm guessing she lives somewhere between 2nd ave and York avenue (I'm giving this way too much thought). That part of Manhattan is not convenient to the subway. You can take a bus to the subway, but to get to Penn Station or Port Authority, it's a trek.

[trimthatfat]

Jessica seems like the type who'd bring up something you did 3 years ago and use it against you. She never communicates in the moment when something frustrates her - she just lets it build up until she explodes. I used to be the same way and honestly, it did far more harm to my relationship than I realized. I had to actively work to become a better communicator to my spouse.

 

Davina explicitly said she told 'them' (I assume the experts) that she was not going to relocate. I don't get why she didn't explain that to Sean immediately. Sean needs to be in therapy, not on a reality show. He has some serious unresolved issues, re: childhood bullying.

[cpcathy]

Ugh, these people exhaust me. Does anyone think that the producers offer one or more of the participants MORE money if they agree to be matched with an ass? I just can't tell what real and what's manipulated. All they ever do on this show is talk about, "this is our first this" and "this is our first that." Are they not allowed to have actual private, normal conversations or are these not filmed?

 

Ryan D is a crazy person, script or no.

Jessica needs to cook.

Davina is the most tiring of all, this "marriage has to be a fairy tale" is nonsense. Everyone who is married should know this. God forbid your spouse be a human and have flaws. It was a huge tell when she finished expressing how she felt about the Manhattan thing and Sean just sat there and said, "I'm tired." Then nothing. He is NOT into this anymore. Davina is so very, very high maintenance. But Sean is an idiot. You were bullied, so were a lot of other people. Get over it.

I believe Jaclyn and Ryan like each other, but I do think she's ramping it up a bit for TV, or she's been told to.

Edited April 29, 2015 by cpcathy

[buckbuck]

I really don't think the experts understand how to pick people.  You can't expect someone to fill the holes in someone else.  I honestly wish they'd use different experts next season because everyone knows these people are quacks.  

"You can't expect someone to fill the holes in someone else."

 

Now we know why the "experts" suck so much -- they attended the Jerry Maguire School of Matchmaking: "You complete me."  :)

[SaucyMommy]

Watching this episode I found the editing so confusing. Jessica was wearing the same top in the beginning and at the end of the episode with New Years in between. They ate sushi too both those times. I just wonder if the fight was edited together? I know they were arguing - that was clear - but it was not clear to me WHAT they were actually fighting about. Forget these two making it work. It's clear to me they don't stay married. No way no how

[Bandolero]

Re Jessica: A guy can be take charge and be alpha but still be patient and gentle with his wife. Ryan is so not that. He needs an assertive and aggressive woman who calls him on his shit. Jessica's manner of handling confrontation just does not match his. He needs someone willing to get kinda loud and brash and go up against him but Jessica is not like that. Granted she is passive-aggressive and obviously struggles with self-esteem and a guy like Ryan who likes to pick at her is just not a good match. She should at least cook for the man though especially since she made a point of saying that she likes to cook.

 

Re: Davina. I read a book about attachment styles and Davina definitely seems to have an anxious style while Sean has an avoidant style. The more he distances himself then the more needy she gets which of course causes him to pull away even more. I think if Sean would show Davina that he is actually invested and truly cares she would definitely ratchet down. I think she senses his distance and disconnect and it is causing her to urgently seek validation from him. I actually thought Davina's plan about her apartment sounded reasonable. She is not against moving but is just trying to make a rational decision... she seems willing to move to Jersey eventually. It seems that once things don't go his way, Sean just checks out. Why is it that the woman is always the one expected to make concessions?

 

I think Jaclyn is putting on an act. The whole acting shy and putting her head down in her talking heads is a giveaway to me. It just does not ring true IMO. As I said before, she seems to be the one setting the tone and pace of their relationship. I guess Ryan is okay with that.  

Edited April 29, 2015 by Bandolero

[The Evil One]

Ryan's nonstop adulation of his grandparents has got to stop. I understand it's his go-to frame of reference for an ideal relationship, but he needs to find another one. Siblings? Friends? Any relationship in the modern era? Thinking that his grandmother liked being spoken to like that because she was in love is so misguided. How about, given the time or her background, she might have thought his grandfather was an intolerable asshat, but didn't have any means to leave him and take her kids with her. So she put up with it because she felt like she had to. And oy, Jessica. Ryan may be a douchebag, but she doesn't seem to understand the difference between choosing your battles and having absolutely no voice. She so desperately wants Ryan to like her that she's completely afraid of being herself, and then blows up at him because she resents him for it. She doesn't seem to acknowledge that she is in a prison of her own making.

[mla40]

Sean and Davina come across as aliens who took over human bodies and read a manual on how human are supposed to interact with each other. I hate the way both of them act, it's so forced on both their parts. They definitely didn't fit with the vibe of the place they went on New Years Eve. Davina might think she's Carry Bradshaw but she's a far far cry from New York sophistication.

Ryan and Jessica. Ugh. Ryan is hot though, they could send that asshole my direction and I would cook for that boy and iron wherever he wanted me to...as long as he was giving up the goods.

Ryan and Jaclyn, I laughed when she said she came around 360°. Oh honey, sober up a little, lol.

[kalamac]

Some Aussies were protesting the Australian version of this show that's due to start, saying it was fucked up that strangers could marry while we still don't have marriage equality over here, and the network had to release a statement admitting that none of the marriages are actually legal when they first happen, but the couple will have the option of making it legal after a certain period of time.

[JaneVM]

Some Aussies were protesting the Australian version of this show that's due to start, saying it was fucked up that strangers could marry while we still don't have marriage equality over here, and the network had to release a statement admitting that none of the marriages are actually legal when they first happen, but the couple will have the option of making it legal after a certain !period of time.

 

I thought this was the case!  Because the 6 week decision show seemed to be this big deal and I always said, if they are truly married what difference does it make to stay together a bit longer to give it their best shot?

[crazychicken]

In Australia they could not be legally married as you need to lodge an intention to marry at least 30 days prior to the ceremony, it does make a mockery of the premise of the show that they can not just walk away when times get tough as they are married so will be more committed to making the relationship work

 

I thought this was the case!  Because the 6 week decision show seemed to be this big deal and I always said, if they are truly married what difference does it make to stay together a bit longer to give it their best shot?

Jamie has said in the media that at the end of the 6 weeks they were not in love and they still did not know if it would work but Doug convinced her to give it a shot, she said it was not until around the 6 month mark of the relationship that she felt committed, now I could be cynical but it was around the time they announced they would be filming them for First Year. It was a pretty telling that the first time she told him she loved him was on the 6 month follow up, I thought it was a bit off that she saves the 'big' moments for filming. Like the vow renewal it looked like Doug proposed so they organised the second wedding, but in the media she said they had already planned the renewal, but she was surprised by the proposal.

[Palomar]

It doesn't even seem like Ryan and Jessica and Sean and Davina even LIKE each other right now.  You have to have some kind of friendship, whether sex is involved or not, or living together is not going to work (married or not)....especially since all 4 are giving up something in these relationships.  Jaclyn and Ryan obviously started slowly but they at least seemed to like each other as friends from the beginning and that was something to build on.  By no means are they "safe" but watching them build their relationship is the best thing about the show.   

Edited April 30, 2015 by Palomar

[mamey2422]

Sean and Davina come across as aliens who took over human bodies and read a manual on how human are supposed to interact with each other. I hate the way both of them act, it's so forced on both their parts.

HA! I love your description of Sean and Davina. Their immediate physical affection and "deep" therapy-like conversations were so bizarre to me. Alien is right!

[Snarklepuss]

Ryan's nonstop adulation of his grandparents has got to stop. I understand it's his go-to frame of reference for an ideal relationship, but he needs to find another one. Siblings? Friends? Any relationship in the modern era? Thinking that his grandmother liked being spoken to like that because she was in love is so misguided. How about, given the time or her background, she might have thought his grandfather was an intolerable asshat, but didn't have any means to leave him and take her kids with her. So she put up with it because she felt like she had to.

 

I really seriously doubt that Ryan's grandfather ever acted the way he is toward Jessica.  I don't think Ryan has the type of personality and genuine affection for Jessica that his grandfather probably had for his grandmother.  I'll bet his granddad is probably rolling over in his grave thinking that Ryan is making the world think he was anything like the bossy, intrusive, unevolved, jerkenstein Ryan is being right now.  If he thinks he's going to respect his grandparents by acting like a spoiled dictator, he is seriously mistaken.  He lacks the depth to be able to understand and duplicate what he saw in their relationship.  I'm just so sure it was not like that all between his grandparents.

 

 

And oy, Jessica. Ryan may be a douchebag, but she doesn't seem to understand the difference between choosing your battles and having absolutely no voice. She so desperately wants Ryan to like her that she's completely afraid of being herself, and then blows up at him because she resents him for it. She doesn't seem to acknowledge that she is in a prison of her own making.

 

Jessica is locked into a pattern of self-sabotage with Ryan, and I suspect also in many if not all of her previous relationships.   I don't think Jessica knows what "being herself" is with a man.  This is all she's ever known.  She blows up because she's holding a lot of anger inside of her.  Some of that anger is not based on reality but her own reinterpretation of a man's motivations so that they re-confirm her basic fear that all men (in this case Ryan) want to keep her a victim.  She said she wanted a "take charge" kind of guy but if that's only going to keep her locked inside herself because she can't give and take successfully with an assertive guy, how is that going to work?  Personally I think in a sick way she wants a situation in which she feels victimized (whether she really is or not) because she really doesn't feel worth being treated on equal basis in a relationship.  I don't think she feels she is worth being anything but a victim - definitely not an equal to a man.  Whenever Ryan tries to be flexible, thus treating her as an equal, she makes sure to twist it back around again that he's victimizing her.  Then when he storms out angry at her, she is able to blame him for victimizing her.  It's a lousy kind of comfort but it's what she knows and seems to make happen no matter what.   I hate to say it but without some therapy the only hope for her is that after many years of unhappiness she realizes that it's not just that she picks the wrong guys, but that the first person she needs to change is herself before she is ready to be in a healthy relationship. 

[JenE4]

So let me get this straight. Neither Jessica nor Ryan wants to eat sushi every night. Jessica is afraid to say something to Ryan about wanting to cook because it might upset him. So Ryan says something about Jessica's plan to cook and that upset HER?! Either you want to cook and want to get that out in the open, or everyone is going to eat sushi and regret every night. That's just insane. I know most people think Ryan is a hot head--and maybe he is--but I feel like Jessica is gaslighting him with her unheard of levels of passive aggression. I can even excuse the ironing on the bed fear because my husband too freaked out when he first saw me ironing on the bed--"You're going to burn the house down! That's why ironing boards are metal!" That's probably what grandma taught him. As for the TV moving, I'm on whosoever side was against having it on the dresser. I noticed that earlier--they had this huge TV teetering on a dresser that was smaller than it, and the TV was just overlapping the closet door frame. Self-proclaimed home safety inspector over here rules that they can use the iron with caution on the bed, as long as they have a heavy bedspread, but they should move the TV before it gets knocked over and injures someone!