Small Talk: We'll Be Right Back

[Prevailing Wind]

Honestly, I think the hygienists deserve more pay than they DO get. You only see the dentist when there's a problem. The hygienist sees EVERYONE, problem or not, and some of those mouths are downright nasty.

 

[Bastet]

6 minutes ago, Prevailing Wind said:

Honestly, I think the hygienists deserve more pay than they DO get. You only see the dentist when there's a problem. The hygienist sees EVERYONE, problem or not, and some of those mouths are downright nasty.

 

As I recently said in another thread, I followed my dental hygienist from one dentist to another.  I've never even had a cavity, so my dentist is just someone who reads my x-rays every few years.  My hygienist is the one actually working on and monitoring my teeth.  I'm much more invested in my relationship with the hygienist than the dentist.  She's great - we share a love for cats, and for what you can learn via continuing education credits, which a lot of people in both our professions (dental and legal) dismiss as a useless burden -  and I'm going to be really bummed when she retires (she's been cleaning my teeth most of my life, and is already down to working one day a week, so I know it's coming).  I do like the dentist I followed her to, so I'll try the other hygienist in the practice when the time comes, but I'll be out if I'm not satisfied.

[madmax]

The hygienist at my practice quit to work somewhere else.  She was so popular that patients were following her to the new practice.  The dentist begged her to come back, so she did, at a higher rate of pay. 

I would have followed her, but I didn't find out she left until I went for my regular cleaning.  When I set up the appointment for my next one, I told the receptionist that I wasn't sure I'd be back for cleaning if Megan wasn't there.  That's when she told me that she was coming back the next week.

I really do like her, but damn, she drives me nuts when she talks to me while my mouth is wide open and I can't respond.  And she LOVES to talk.  😄

Edited September 27, 2021 by madmax

[proserpina65]

On 8/31/2021 at 2:17 PM, nokat said:

Speaking of spiders, we have black widows. They have high tensile strength webs, so if you walk into a web and it stretches with you, you know there is a widow. Then I freak out thinking it's in my hair. I'm otherwise friendly to spiders who eat the bugs. I also apologize to the spiders who decide to hang out in my shower and have to see me naked.

My agreement with spiders is that if they're outside (or in the shed), I try to leave them alone.  If they come into my house, they're toast.

On 9/4/2021 at 7:18 AM, Leeds said:

An American friend and I once spent a hilarious evening with some Geordies (those from the northeast of England).  My friend told me afterwards that he hadn't understood a single word the whole evening but nonetheless had the best time ever.  I did understand, and though this was over 30 years ago, I still have phantom rib pain from laughing so hard.

When I was in London in 2000, my friend and I went to take pictures of Arsenal's stadium (Highbury at the time) on a Sunday morning.  Turns out it was the day Chelsea played Newcastle in the FA Cup semifinal, and we bumped into some Newcastle supporters on the Underground.  They were already well into the booze at 11 a.m., but at least they were fun drunks.

[janie jones]

I've had the same hygienist and dentist my entire life. The dentist was someone who joined my parents' previous dentists' practice and then started his own shortly before the original dentists retired. The receptionist and one of the hygienists went with him. Although I like and trust my dentist, I agree with Bastet that my hygienist is the one I'm invested in. Although I have had some work done, the hygienist is the one I interact with more, and she's the one who's primarily "in charge" of my care. If for some reason the dentist and hygienist parted ways, I'd go with the hygienist.

Regarding giving managers compliments about employees (from another thread): If you're doing this at a place that has survey invitations on the receipt, please consider doing that instead, or in addition. It's appreciated when you verbalize the compliment, but it's better for everyone if it's made "official." A good manager already knows if the employee is good, but putting it in a survey lets the higher-ups know, and provides a written record. A shitty manager might not know if the employee is good, and putting it in the survey lets the higher-ups know. But mainly, corporate tracks the info on the surveys, and verbal compliments don't "count." For the same reason it's nice for managers to hear a compliment in person because the only time the manager gets called is because there's a problem, it's also good for the positives to be put on the surveys.

Also, if you do do a survey, and there's like a 1-10 scale, just give them a 10 if you're happy. I'm sure not all places, but some places give a scale, but treat it as a thumbs up/thumbs down. Where I work, scores of 1-8 are valued the same. You might think, "An 8's a B! That's good! I was happy, but there's always room for improvement!" But no. An 8 is the same as a 1. Obviously we all think this is ridiculous, but that's how it is. I've heard similar things about other places' surveys. Now that I know that, to play it safe, I always just give people 10s unless I'm pissed because you can't be sure how it's weighted.

[proserpina65]

14 minutes ago, janie jones said:

I've had the same hygienist and dentist my entire life. The dentist was someone who joined my parents' previous dentists' practice and then started his own shortly before the original dentists retired. The receptionist and one of the hygienists went with him. Although I like and trust my dentist, I agree with Bastet that my hygienist is the one I'm invested in. Although I have had some work done, the hygienist is the one I interact with more, and she's the one who's primarily "in charge" of my care. If for some reason the dentist and hygienist parted ways, I'd go with the hygienist.

Regarding giving managers compliments about employees (from another thread): If you're doing this at a place that has survey invitations on the receipt, please consider doing that instead, or in addition. It's appreciated when you verbalize the compliment, but it's better for everyone if it's made "official." A good manager already knows if the employee is good, but putting it in a survey lets the higher-ups know, and provides a written record. A shitty manager might not know if the employee is good, and putting it in the survey lets the higher-ups know. But mainly, corporate tracks the info on the surveys, and verbal compliments don't "count." For the same reason it's nice for managers to hear a compliment in person because the only time the manager gets called is because there's a problem, it's also good for the positives to be put on the surveys.

Also, if you do do a survey, and there's like a 1-10 scale, just give them a 10 if you're happy. I'm sure not all places, but some places give a scale, but treat it as a thumbs up/thumbs down. Where I work, scores of 1-8 are valued the same. You might think, "An 8's a B! That's good! I was happy, but there's always room for improvement!" But no. An 8 is the same as a 1. Obviously we all think this is ridiculous, but that's how it is. I've heard similar things about other places' surveys. Now that I know that, to play it safe, I always just give people 10s unless I'm pissed because you can't be sure how it's weighted.

Definitely do both.  The manager can say something to the employee right away, but that survey will go on the record officially.

[Crashcourse]

On 9/27/2021 at 12:38 PM, madmax said:

I really do like her, but damn, she drives me nuts when she talks to me while my mouth is wide open and I can't respond.  And she LOVES to talk.  😄

My hygienist does the same thing!  She's really nice but she should know that I can't respond.

[peacheslatour]

2 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

My hygienist does the same thing!  She's really nice but she should know that I can't respond.

She's probably not expecting you to, she's just trying to put you at ease.

[Crashcourse]

38 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

She's probably not expecting you to, she's just trying to put you at ease.

Oh no, she asks questions. 😬

Edited September 30, 2021 by Crashcourse

[nokat]

3 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

My hygienist does the same thing!  She's really nice but she should know that I can't respond.

Blink twice if you agree.

I do think they are trying to relax you. A lot of people get nervous at the dentist. Cleanings I'm so used to that I can almost fall asleep.

Edited September 30, 2021 by nokat

[peacheslatour]

Anything from Jewel?

[bankerchick]

6 hours ago, proserpina65 said:

My agreement with spiders is that if they're outside (or in the shed), I try to leave them alone.  If they come into my house, they're toast.

My sentiments exactly.  A mosquito or earwig is dead wherever I find it.

[nokat]

2 minutes ago, bankerchick said:

My sentiments exactly.  A mosquito or earwig is dead wherever I find it.

You had to mention earwigs. Flying earwigs were a nightmare made real.  Shudders.

 

[Moose135]

On 9/30/2021 at 3:03 PM, proserpina65 said:

They were already well into the booze at 11 a.m., but at least they were fun drunks.

In fairness, they had probably been working on it since the day before...

😄

[SoMuchTV]

1 hour ago, icemiser69 said:

Speaking of toast.  Back in the day when I was a kid, every so often I would go over a friend's house and his mom would offer to make breakfast which consisted of burnt toast.  That was it, she always burned the toast.  In any case, she would always say that eating her burnt toast would grow hair on my chest.

If burnt toast truly does have magical powers I would rather have it used for something else.

“It’ll grow hair on your chest, kid” is something I’ve heard about many things over the years, not specific to burnt toast. Somewhere up there with “rub some dirt on it”. 

[madmax]

On 9/30/2021 at 3:06 PM, janie jones said:

Regarding giving managers compliments about employees (from another thread): If you're doing this at a place that has survey invitations on the receipt, please consider doing that instead, or in addition. It's appreciated when you verbalize the compliment, but it's better for everyone if it's made "official." A good manager already knows if the employee is good, but putting it in a survey lets the higher-ups know, and provides a written record. A shitty manager might not know if the employee is good, and putting it in the survey lets the higher-ups know. But mainly, corporate tracks the info on the surveys, and verbal compliments don't "count." For the same reason it's nice for managers to hear a compliment in person because the only time the manager gets called is because there's a problem, it's also good for the positives to be put on the surveys.

In most organizations, compliments or complaints do not count unless it is signed.  They don't want someone with a grudge or someone's sweetheart trying to tip the balance.  I've always sent either a written letter (back in the day) or an email with my full name and phone number whenever I've felt the need to compliment or complain.  

On 9/30/2021 at 3:06 PM, janie jones said:

Where I work, scores of 1-8 are valued the same. You might think, "An 8's a B! That's good! I was happy, but there's always room for improvement!" But no. An 8 is the same as a 1. Obviously we all think this is ridiculous, but that's how it is. I've heard similar things about other places' surveys. Now that I know that, to play it safe, I always just give people 10s unless I'm pissed because you can't be sure how it's weighted.

I've heard that from many employees where 1-5 scales are used.  The bosses only care about 5s.  One organization actually dinged employees for getting 4s.

On 9/30/2021 at 7:09 PM, Crashcourse said:

Oh no, she asks questions. 😬

As does mine.  A lot of questions.  She probably is just trying to keep me at ease, which is cool, just no more questions!

[mmecorday]

Quote

I often read obituaries to see what euphemisms people use instead of just saying, "died". Some are very interesting, like "slipped the surly bonds of Earth and crossed the bridge to be with Jesus", and others are a little confusing.  I see a lot of "transitioned", and I just want to say to the obituary writers, "You keep using that word.  I do not think it means what you think it means."

I am an obituary editor and when those euphemisms are used in obituaries, it means that the family has written the obit for the deceased and it is a paid notice. At our paper we do free obituaries for people who lived in the coverage area. It's usually a very brief biographical sketch including funeral arrangements and information on memorial gifts made in the name of the deceased. But we do not say "He gained his angel wings and is now circling over the White Cliffs of Dover" or "he closed his eyes and when he opened them again, he saw the face of his Savior." Also, in my 15 years as an obituary editor, I have learned that there are a lot of people in this world who never met a stranger.

[PrincessPurrsALot]

I am an officiant who does most of my work on funerals and memorial services.  I am also a grief counselor, so its a good combo.  At the same time, when the shelter in place orders hit I was midway through the training to be a community chaplain helping the police and medical examiners when there is a death.  We would be there for death notices and had to learn the format.  The standard is "<name of person you are speaking to>, I am sorry to inform you that your <relationship> <full name of the deceased> died today."  We always say died. Anything else can be misinterpreted.  

When I officiate ceremonies, I don't shy away from the words died or death, but I have been at services where people refuse to use those words.  I do find that in polite conversation I tend to say passed away since, in the US, it is well understood and tends to not upset people as much.  But I never use anything beyond that.  Some of the obituaries I see make me think I might die from terminal eye rolling, but I can also understand it can make the family feel better.

Then again, @mmecorday, I've met many strangers, so nobody is writing one of those flowery obituaries for me. 😁

[EtheltoTillie]

On 9/4/2021 at 5:48 AM, Leeds said:

Why yes.  (Was it my description of my annoying sister-in-law that tipped you off?  Wait, Doris, that's not you is it?  I meant no offence luv.)

 

On 9/4/2021 at 6:45 AM, nokat said:

Sometimes from certain areas of the UK (*cough Wales) I'll wonder if we're both speaking English. I have a feeling I'd understand half of what you said to me. I did get told my English has a very pronounced accent too.

@Leeds, do you live in the US now?  Did not realize.  This New Yorker has to tell you folks my accent stories.   Before the pandemic my husband was making a number of trips to the UK for medical conferences, and I would usually tag along.  We were even in London for the Meghan and Harry wedding!  We did fine in Wales accent wise, although obviously we couldn’t read the signs.

We have been to Liverpool twice, flying through Manchester. The so-called Scouser accent is impenetrable.  It’s not like listening to the Beatles in A Hard Day’s Night.  There was a cashier at Zara in Liverpool whom I just nodded at after a while. I don’t know what I agreed to, but I was trying to get info about the VAT exemption. Then on a morning flight back home from Manchester to JFK the flight attendant was asking us if we wanted a mumble mumble and we had no idea what words she was uttering no matter how many times she repeated it, and the other passengers tried to help, and finally it emerged that she was offering a Bucks Fizz, which turns out to be a mimosa.  Whew. They all looked at me as if I had three heads.

A couple of days ago by chance I caught a BBC doc on YouTube on the Jews of Leeds.  If you haven’t seen it Google it.  @Leeds, you would find it interesting, as you once  mentioned your relatives who worked in the garment trades.  Our Ashkenazi ancestors  created the same communities wherever they went!  

 

[nokat]

5 hours ago, PrincessPurrsALot said:

Then again, @mmecorday, I've met many strangers, so nobody is writing one of those flowery obituaries for me. 😁

I watch too many of the ID true crime shows. "Their smile lit up the room. Everyone loves them." I'm like, don't be that person, they get murdered.

[Katy M]

12 minutes ago, nokat said:

I watch too many of the ID true crime shows. "Their smile lit up the room. Everyone loves them." I'm like, don't be that person, they get murdered.

Looks like I'm safe then.

[nokat]

5 hours ago, Katy M said:

Looks like I'm safe then.

We're being truthful here? Any cat in your house is plotting your murder.

[Katy M]

12 minutes ago, nokat said:

We're being truthful here? Any cat in your house is plotting your murder.

Nope.  She knows that only I can open her canned food.  

[peacheslatour]

41 minutes ago, nokat said:

We're being truthful here? Any cat in your house is plotting your murder.

Soon...

 

[susannah]

1 hour ago, Katy M said:

Nope.  She knows that only I can open her canned food.  

For sure. Good help is hard to find!

[nokat]

1 hour ago, susannah said:

For sure. Good help is hard to find!

I never knew having thumbs would be this useful.

[mmecorday]

Quote

I watch too many of the ID true crime shows. "Their smile lit up the room. Everyone loves them." I'm like, don't be that person, they get murdered.

Isn't this the truth? You never hear anyone say, "She was the meanest, nastiest person on the face of the earth and she deserved to be bludgeoned to death by a bust of Nelson Rockefeller."

[chessiegal]

13 minutes ago, mmecorday said:

Isn't this the truth? You never hear anyone say, "She was the meanest, nastiest person on the face of the earth and she deserved to be bludgeoned to death by a bust of Nelson Rockefeller."

Unless you're watching Perry Mason.  😅

[susannah]

16 minutes ago, mmecorday said:

Isn't this the truth? You never hear anyone say, "She was the meanest, nastiest person on the face of the earth and she deserved to be bludgeoned to death by a bust of Nelson Rockefeller."

This comment is for the WIN! 😀

1 minute ago, chessiegal said:

Unless you're watching Perry Mason.  😅

At which time the guilty party will leap up during the trial and tearfully confess!

[Prevailing Wind]

Sometimes on Midsomer Murders, they'll mention the deceased deserved killing.

[PrincessPurrsALot]

1 hour ago, mmecorday said:

Isn't this the truth? You never hear anyone say, "She was the meanest, nastiest person on the face of the earth and she deserved to be bludgeoned to death by a bust of Nelson Rockefeller."

I may have written a more honest obit for my mother but did not share it publicly.  Certain family members enjoyed it and added on.  Some highlights included "the devil incarnate, and we're not talking about the fun, sexy, Tom Ellis version", "she never met a person she couldn't try to gaslight and manipulate", and, quoting from Addams Family Values, "I have seen evil! I have seen HORROR! I HAVE SEEN THE UNHOLY MAGGOTS WHICH FEAST IN THE DARK RECESSES OF THE HUMAN SOUL" and adding "and I have seen all of these in <Mom's name>".  Yes, we are an extremely dark and snarky family.  Why do you ask? 

Of course in the public obit she was a devoted and caring mother who lived for her children.  🙄 

[peacheslatour]

20 minutes ago, PrincessPurrsALot said:

I may have written a more honest obit for my mother but did not share it publicly.  Certain family members enjoyed it and added on.  Some highlights included "the devil incarnate, and we're not talking about the fun, sexy, Tom Ellis version", "she never met a person she couldn't try to gaslight and manipulate", and, quoting from Addams Family Values, "I have seen evil! I have seen HORROR! I HAVE SEEN THE UNHOLY MAGGOTS WHICH FEAST IN THE DARK RECESSES OF THE HUMAN SOUL" and adding "and I have seen all of these in <Mom's name>".  Yes, we are an extremely dark and snarky family.  Why do you ask? 

Of course in the public obit she was a devoted and caring mother who lived for her children.  🙄 

My favorite Addams Family quote and I use it often.

Morticia: You have gone too far. You have married Fester, you have destroyed his spirit, you have taken him from us. All that I could forgive. But, Debbie... ...pastels?

[Annber03]

I just saw Addams Family Values for the first time recently and really enjoyed it. It was hilarious - so many great one-liners and exchanges throughout. 

[nokat]

48 minutes ago, PrincessPurrsALot said:

I may have written a more honest obit for my mother but did not share it publicly.  Certain family members enjoyed it and added on.  Some highlights included "the devil incarnate, and we're not talking about the fun, sexy, Tom Ellis version", "she never met a person she couldn't try to gaslight and manipulate", and, quoting from Addams Family Values, "I have seen evil! I have seen HORROR! I HAVE SEEN THE UNHOLY MAGGOTS WHICH FEAST IN THE DARK RECESSES OF THE HUMAN SOUL" and adding "and I have seen all of these in <Mom's name>".  Yes, we are an extremely dark and snarky family.  Why do you ask? 

Of course in the public obit she was a devoted and caring mother who lived for her children.  🙄 

Sorry you had to go through that. Honest obituaries should be in the paper. Yes, the darkest people get loving obituaries.

[nokat]

Write your own obituary:

She's survived by some assholes, here are their names. She saw her cat piss on a neighbor's grill and laughed. She did some good things and donated when she could. She could be snarky but not evil in her heart.

[peacheslatour]

10 minutes ago, nokat said:

Sorry you had to go through that. Honest obituaries should be in the paper. Yes, the darkest people get loving obituaries.

I know my gorgon of a MIL will. My SIL will write it and it will be full of lies and omissions.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

51 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

My favorite Addams Family quote and I use it often.

Morticia: You have gone too far. You have married Fester, you have destroyed his spirit, you have taken him from us. All that I could forgive. But, Debbie... ...pastels?

"MALIBU BARBIE!!!!!""

[Annber03]

"An ax...oh, that takes me back..."

[PrincessPurrsALot]

The toast: To passion. To paradise. To pain. (with a big grin) Tonight!

[peacheslatour]

45 minutes ago, PrincessPurrsALot said:

The toast: To passion. To paradise. To pain. (with a big grin) Tonight!

Morticia:  "Do you think that when a new baby arrives, one of the other children has to die?

Wednesday, Pugsley: Yes.

Grandma: Well, that's just not true.

[sighs wistfully]

Grandma: Not anymore.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

7 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Morticia:  "Do you think that when a new baby arrives, one of the other children has to die?

Wednesday, Pugsley: Yes.

Pugsley: "We just want to play with him."

Wednesday: "Especially his head."

[Annber03]

Gomez: "He has my father's eyes."

Morticia: "Gomez, take those out of his mouth." 

[Cobalt Stargazer]

Morticia: "It was agony."

Gomez: "We went through all the baby name books. Benito. Mao. Lucifer."

Morticia: "Finally we settled on something simple. Something a child could live with."

Gomez: "Pubert."

Debbie: "Pubert. I like it. It's filthy."

(Seriously, I will quote the entire thing.)

[peacheslatour]

Morticia, reading The Cat In The Hat: "I know it is wet, and the sun is not sunny. But we can have lots of good fun... that is funny."

[flipping to the last page]

Morticia: Oh, no. He lives."

[MargeGunderson]

4 hours ago, mmecorday said:

Isn't this the truth? You never hear anyone say, "She was the meanest, nastiest person on the face of the earth and she deserved to be bludgeoned to death by a bust of Nelson Rockefeller."

I can think of a couple people that I would say that about. 

[susannah]

31 minutes ago, MargeGunderson said:

I can think of a couple people that I would say that about. 

I just looked it up and apparently there are people who told the truth about the deceased in their obituaries!

 

[Bastet]

9 minutes ago, susannah said:

I just looked it up and apparently there are people who told the truth about the deceased in their obituaries!

I remember when this one made the news.  Good for her!

[Cobalt Stargazer]

On a related note, because I'm over here wheezing:

[susannah]

29 minutes ago, Cobalt Stargazer said:

On a related note, because I'm over here wheezing:

This is just TOO funny!

[nokat]

I punched myself in the face while sleeping. This is a special talent. I wasn't even dreaming. I do have a good right hook.