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S10.E01: Jill's Secret


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LOL!  Derrick is so eloquent!  I had to laugh when he said, following his brother's confusion with the whole "you're an uncle" thing,  "You know Jill?  My wife?  We're gonna have a baby.......together."  Then this:  "She's pregnant.......with a baby."

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Ah ok , thanks for the information. I thought maybe it was Jessa's laptop and she changed it. I should have figured they shared computers , since they share everything else. 

Let's back up this train a bit. About a year ago, when the girls were still "writing" that book, they were shown in their bedroom, each working on a laptop. So I beg to differ; they have their own laptops. Jessa obviously upgraded to the pink not long ago; I think that was part of her registry. 

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I think it showed a little into Josie's personality, courtesy of her mother. When Jill brought out the basket of nail polish and Josie jumped in to grab one, Jill reminded her to sit back and use her manners. That child didn't listen to a word she said and still kept on yelling and reaching for what she wanted. I know kids, they're not big listeners, but this scene showed so much, IMO. The other 3 girls sat and waiting, yet still excited. Not Josie. She gets away with a lot and I have a feeling that's going to hurt her a ton in the long run. 

 

100% true - and entirely typical of lastborns, as well as babies/children who experienced catastrophic events early in life. Parents are often reticent to demand the same behavior of them, unwilling to make what they may perceive as "unreasonable" demands on them. They get cut a lot of slack based on their prior difficulties and "get away with" things that would would never be tolerated with older children. And it invariably hurts them in the long run. They grow up expecting special treatment - that rules do not apply to them. They often have a lot of difficulty making and keeping friends and love relationships - and needless to say, with workplace relationships as well. Every child, regardless of their birth order or history, must be taught how to behave, and solid consistent discipline is a key part of that. Regardless of how unpleasant the parents consider it, it must be done - in the child's long-term best interest.

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I think Josie, like the others was high on a sugar loaded experience and didn't listen to Jill; heck she most likely didn't even hear her...she sure listened to Jill at her parents' house when Jill told her "NO', you get to do THIS now... I agree though that children in Josie's situation are more than likely cut more slack than the others too.


Let's also remember that Michelle is the last born baby in her nuclear family..you can tell from an early on interview short as it was, with her sisters, who stated that basically Michelle was a spoiled brat and got her way...the more she was told 'No", the more she protested with her own parents... spoiled brat.

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parisprincess, you are right--that was hilarious! 

 

My wife, Jill.  You remember her?  She's pregnant, with a baby.

 

Really?   A baby?  Thanks for clearing that up for us.

 

Derrick is coming off as more stupid every time they show him.

 

And wouldn't you tell your mom before your brother?

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Does anyone else remember the time that Jordyn was outside in the cold mud and Boob finally missed her and brought her into the house.? So much of the Jordyn neglect has been swiffered out of the shows when they were on Netflix but I do remember most of it. 

 

 

I don't remember that - but I do remember the kid just wandering off during some group interview and nobody noticing for ages.  Poor kid.  And I'm getting ticked off with TLC's editing.  If for no other reason than I start to wonder if I was hallucinating during previous seasons! 

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I think I may be the only " last born" child who was not shown priority treatment from my parents. I was not given a free ride on things & was disciplined as much as my older brother & sister. What I do remember is getting the last scoop of food after it was passed to the others first & wearing a lot of hand-me-down clothes from my sister, who got new things because she was the first girl. I had to work & save for my first car as did my siblings.

I know birth order has stereotypes, including only children being spoiled brats. I like to believe it's not so much birth order but rather how a person is raised (discipline, rules, etc.) that determines how they act & turn out. I realize there are exceptions. In the Duggar's case, it's Miracle Josie, who can do no wrong in MEchelle's & Boob's eyes.

Like we have said, the older Duggar children were disciplined more & it shows. With all those kids & different buddy groups it has now become a free for all for anything in that house.

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Just watched this clip, and I didn't really catch it when the episode aired, but I think Jill is learning new vocabulary having met and married Derick. When she refers to the experience as being surreal, she pronounces it almost like "cereal".

Aww, Derick really is opening up a whole world for Jill.

I wonder if Derick feels like he married a giggly 13 year-old girl?

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Just watched this clip, and I didn't really catch it when the episode aired, but I think Jill is learning new vocabulary having met and married Derick. When she refers to the experience as being surreal, she pronounces it almost like "cereal".

Aww, Derick really is opening up a whole world for Jill.

I wonder if Derick feels like he married a giggly 13 year-old girl?

 

Aww Jilly Muffin is learning new "stuff".

 

I really thought she was less giggly this past episode (first we've seen at length since he popped her cork). Maybe being around people that do not have the last name Duggar made her realize you don't need to get the giggles all the time. Or she thinks this marriage stuff is overrated. Or she's thinking, "I saved myself all these years for THAT?"

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Let's also remember that Michelle is the last born baby in her nuclear family..you can tell from an early on interview short as it was, with her sisters, who stated that basically Michelle was a spoiled brat and got her way...the more she was told 'No", the more she protested with her own parents... spoiled brat.

 

Yes, this is key to the Duggars situation. IMO, Mechelle is not only a last-born but a last-born narcissist. Otherwise known as a narcissist on steroids. No matter what, she is not going to do anything she doesn't want to do, even raising her own children. Most women with children usually sacrifice happily for their children - or at least manage to rise above their own wishes when it means something better for their children. She never has - and never will. If women were required to take exams and be licensed before they could have a baby, Mechelle would have had the most spectacular "fails" in history.

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I think I may be the only " last born" child who was not shown priority treatment from my parents. I was not given a free ride on things & was disciplined as much as my older brother & sister. What I do remember is getting the last scoop of food after it was passed to the others first & wearing a lot of hand-me-down clothes from my sister, who got new things because she was the first girl. I had to work & save for my first car as did my siblings.

I know birth order has stereotypes, including only children being spoiled brats. I like to believe it's not so much birth order but rather how a person is raised (discipline, rules, etc.) that determines how they act & turn out. I realize there are exceptions. In the Duggar's case, it's Miracle Josie, who can do no wrong in MEchelle's & Boob's eyes.

Like we have said, the older Duggar children were disciplined more & it shows. With all those kids & different buddy groups it has now become a free for all for anything in that house.

 

I think you must have had exceptionally fine parents, Barb23. It's not easy to treat each child the same - human nature takes over in the vast majority of families. Overall it's generally accepted that older children receive a more-disciplined upbringing. More is expected of them in just about every area. For younger children, parents realize that they can relax [or they just get tuckered out] and the sky will not fall. There are, of course, advantages and disadvantages at both ends. On the plus sign, older children are likely to be conscientious, organized, reliable - the world's achievers, problem-solvers, leaders. Younger children tend to be more fun-loving, uncomplicated and easy-going, more tender and altruistic. On the negative side, oldest children can often be uptight, cautious and controlling, where youngests will be more attention-seeking and manipulative. It's also important to remember there are all different behavioral levels involved - whether oldest, middle or youngest kids - and many exceptions as well. There are certainly spoiled-rotten firstborns out there, and dependable, responsible last-borns too. 

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Wellfleet- Thank you, I feel I was raised in a great family by exceptional parents. Your posts are spot on. I realize in most families as more children come along things relax. Mine too. I just wanted to make a point that all last borns aren't put on pedestals by their parents. You did hit the nail on the head about Michelle being a last born narcissist & as we have said, Mother of the Year material she is not. It will be interesting to see how the little Dillards will be raised especially if the first couple are boys.

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After watching Jill's TH interview telling us that "this is crazy", I am convinced that these people live in a bubble of a fantasy land with no real plan for life. What did she, a woman who trained to be a midwife, expect would most likely happen when she had relations without any birth control multiple times in her cycle? Conception...no miracle here, just biology when using the recipe God designed. She really acted like and came across like an immature 9th grader IMO.

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I think it showed a little into Josie's personality, courtesy of her mother. When Jill brought out the basket of nail polish and Josie jumped in to grab one, Jill reminded her to sit back and use her manners. That child didn't listen to a word she said and still kept on yelling and reaching for what she wanted. I know kids, they're not big listeners, but this scene showed so much, IMO. The other 3 girls sat and waiting, yet still excited. Not Josie. She gets away with a lot and I have a feeling that's going to hurt her a ton in the long run. 

I've only recently started checking out 19 Kids and Counting so maybe someone can let me know if Josie was ever subjected to the "blanket training" that I've seen mentioned. Or maybe the Duggars no longer subscribe to that philosophy?

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No. It seems to the knowing observer that no kid from Jackson on down (ie. kids born once the cameras started showing up) were not subjected to the blanket training, or even super strict parenting, that the older ones were subjected to. To be even more specific with timing, let's keep in mind that the Pearls' book didn't come out until 1994. That means if the Duggars got it right away, the infant on the blanket would have been Jinger. Jessa would have been a toddler, also in the prime Pearl "training" range for the "hot stove" trick. They suggested it was better for a child to burn themselves to learn caution, rather than constantly be told "no." 

 

Josh has said in older interviews that he wasn't going to be as strict with his kids as his parents were with him. I find this interesting because I don't think MEchelle had her act together until after her breakdown, when Josh would have been about 8. It seems to be that point that they really got strict with the Gothard stuff, even though they had been using it for a few years before then. Of course, Gothard is all about the "obedience" training, as recently exhibited by Anna with Michael. 

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also in the prime Pearl "training" range for the "hot stove" trick.

 

Do the Pearls actually suggest setting it up so a kid DOES burn themselves? 

 

I babysat for a family once shortly after a little girl did burn herself on the stove (the parents did tell her no and to be away from the stove, but uh, toddlers.)  Every time we walked near the kitchen she'd say "no! hot!"  So at least she figured out cause and effect after the ER trip...  Thankfully, there was no permanent damage.

 

 

Timing wise though, it wouldn't surprise me if the Pearls teaching was making the rounds of the social circle before the book came out.  People often test ideas before publishing them.

Edited by Skittl1321
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parisprincess, you are right--that was hilarious! 

 

My wife, Jill.  You remember her?  She's pregnant, with a baby.

 

Really?   A baby?  Thanks for clearing that up for us.

 

Derrick is coming off as more stupid every time they show him.

 

And wouldn't you tell your mom before your brother?

 

Yeah, I gotta agree. What a nimrod. He knows he's going to be filmed sharing the pregnancy news. One would think he'd have thought even a little about what he'd say.  Maybe Derrick - someone for whom I once had high hopes - is in accounting for a really good reason. He's not exactly a man that can think on his feet - or even use words all that well. 

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I think it showed a little into Josie's personality, courtesy of her mother. When Jill brought out the basket of nail polish and Josie jumped in to grab one, Jill reminded her to sit back and use her manners. That child didn't listen to a word she said and still kept on yelling and reaching for what she wanted. I know kids, they're not big listeners, but this scene showed so much, IMO. The other 3 girls sat and waiting, yet still excited. Not Josie. She gets away with a lot and I have a feeling that's going to hurt her a ton in the long run. 

It will definitely hurt her in the long run. That scene made me cringe and I bet Derick was cringing on the inside, too.

 

I actually feel bad for Josie in general and I don't think she's a brat - I think she's in a home where the people around her aren't equipped to give her the boundaries and structure she needs to succeed. As she gets older, her siblings are going to be less sympathetic and patient when they deal with her and that saddens me. It's not her fault her parents are idiots.

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I just watched the pregnancy announcement episode because TLC likes to make these "extended" scene episode come off as new week after week - if I have to re-live Jill's wedding one more time I am going to hurl my remote at the TV it is ENOUGH with Jill, we get it!

 

Anyways :) now that I've gotten that off my chest, I found it hilarious when they announced to Anna and she knew it was a pregnancy announcement. Ah reminds me so much of my life. I've got two older sisters (12 and 13 years older) and they are so bored with their own lives much like Anna so anytime I have something to say they think it will be a pregnancy announcement... sorry to announce I am going to grad school. Anyways I always think of that when it comes to Anna I feel so bad that she hasn't been given anything to look forward to except being a baby machine. 

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I wonder how long it will be before Derrick hangs it up at Walmart. How did he work the day after the sleepover? Not only did they have four little girls sleep over, there was a camera crew there as well. There are also the circus bus trips, appearances in NYC. I can only imagine all the hoopla after the baby is born.

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I think birth order gets thrown off easily depending on gender, socio-economics, and how many years are between the children and how many there are. It's some good generalities, but too many exceptions.

And the Pearls had already pretty much raised their family before the book was published so would have been well known on the homeschool circuit. I'm betting they were circulating some sort of unofficial pamphlet before that. Besides, they aren't the inventors of blanket training - I believe it goes back to the Amish and several different Fundy sects have picked up on it. Pearl only published about it.

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I have wondered for a long time now how derickdillard could possibly be alert at work? That guy is hung on, dragged in to having NO private time at home after work, no relaxation after dinner, and dragged around on speaking tours.

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He may have lived in communal living as a missionary. That, followed by four years in a college dorm may have taught him how to manage in a place without a lot of personal space. He seems pretty introverted, but that might mean he simply doesn't want to do the talking, not that he can't constantly be around people. Introvert/Extrovert are actually pretty complicated words, not simple loves people/loves to be alone.

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Anyways :) now that I've gotten that off my chest, I found it hilarious when they announced to Anna and she knew it was a pregnancy announcement. ....Anyways I always think of that when it comes to Anna I feel so bad that she hasn't been given anything to look forward to except being a baby machine. 

 

I swear I read your first sentence as, "...now that I've gotten a new chest..."  My coffee still hasn't kicked in, obviously. :)

 

Anyway...one thing I tend to have to remind myself of often is this IS Anna's dream.  This has what's been drilled into her head since she was a little girl and her whole left has been grooming to be a mom and wife.  The more pregnancies...the more accomplished she feels.   And, I do think this is definitely her thing. Some, like maybe Michelle and Jessa, and maybe Joy aren't really made for this. But some like Anna and Jill, this is their dream.

 

And I'll add, there's nothing wrong with wanting to be a wife and mom (not directing it at you bumblebee, just in general). If that's someones dream, go for it. I was a stay at home mom for 7 years when my kids were little, now I'm concentrating on my career a bit more. But, I just wish these girls were taught that your whole life doesn't have to revolve around that. I do wish they'd do more, or find something to fall back on, you just never know. And congrats/best wishes on grad school bumblebee!  That's awesome. Next time your sister say, "pregnancy announcement?" when you call, say, "something better...education!"

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I think the big difference between Kelly Bates and Michelle is that when they decided to have "all the children God gave them" Kelly' thought went, "I could have 20 kids! How fun!" While Michelle saw herself holding little babies. Babies are lovely, but they grow up to be real people.

I don't think Anna and Jill mind 20 real people. (Their husbands might!). Jessa definitely does mind, and I really hope for her sake she can separate herself from how she was raised and find her (and Ben's) own path.

Edited by GEML
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Add me to the list of wondering how Derick will be at work after Dilly comes along. I know fathers are more hands on nowadays so will he get up in the middle of the night & try to console a cranky baby for an hour? Will he tell Jill because he has to be rested for work, that it's up to her to take the "midnight shift" ? I realize Jill will be nursing & she needs her rest too, but IMO I would let Derick get a good night's sleep. Even tho both my husband & I worked when my son was born, it was better for all of us that I was the one who got up in the middle of the night. I bottle fed & had a good system down so I was back to bed in no time at all. One time when I was sick, my husband took over the night feeding & it wasn't pretty. I think the whole neighborhood heard my son crying while my husband was figuring everything out & asking me questions even after going over things the night before. He didn't do this to get out of the night feedings, I just did it better & quicker. It will be interesting to see if Jilly keeps driving Derick to& from work after Dilly comes along. I don't want to start the whole "why don't they have a second car" discussion again. I'm just hoping all our questions will be answered about how they will handle things in their perfect little bubble once Dilly comes along.

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I just watched the ridiculous part when Jill claimed to have 'stolen' something from Michelle's bathroom.  Why are there pregnancy tests in Michelle's bathroom?  Either the 48 year old Michelle is still hoping to become pregnant, or TLC suggested this absurd 'plot'.

 

Sheesh..... Derrik's calling his brother and confusing him with 'your an uncle'.  Derrik seems really lame all of a sudden.  I liked the Nepal version of him better.

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I just watched the ridiculous part when Jill claimed to have 'stolen' something from Michelle's bathroom.  Why are there pregnancy tests in Michelle's bathroom?  Either the 48 year old Michelle is still hoping to become pregnant, or TLC suggested this absurd 'plot'.

 

I don't know that Michelle is actively still buying pregnancy tests. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised. She is clearly a little delusional when it comes to that subject. But I could see it just as plausible that she had stocked up so many from "back in the day", that there are still some sitting around and she just can't bear to throw them out. Just like when they had the big garage sale and she was having a hard time getting rid of baby clothing and what-not. 

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I think Derick and Jill will have a fairly smooth transition into parenthood. Jill has been raising Michelle's children for years, so I think she'll be a lot more confident than many first time moms. It's not a typical situation where Jill will learn as she goes because she's already been there, done that.

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I don't know that Michelle is actively still buying pregnancy tests. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised. She is clearly a little delusional when it comes to that subject. But I could see it just as plausible that she had stocked up so many from "back in the day", that there are still some sitting around and she just can't bear to throw them out. Just like when they had the big garage sale and she was having a hard time getting rid of baby clothing and what-not.

I agree. From reading about pregnancy tests online, I saw that people sometimes buy mega packs of these very, very inexpensive tests strips from online...wondfo brand. Fifty for 30$. Supposedly they work okay. I doubt it was a 20$ digital.

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It was a First Response, so a middle of the road test. Yes, they posted a pic of themselves with the day-old pee stick (if it was really a day old and not just peed on).

 

I imagine Mechelle keeps tests around because her periods are becoming irregular due to perimenopause, and she interprets every late period as a potential pregnancy. 

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I don't buy Jill's story about taking a pregnancy test from her mother. I don't doubt that Michelle has tests, but come on. I think that the 'I stole something' line was just a really corny way to make the announcement and have a suspenseful soundbite for the commercials.

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The already recounted how Jill's pregnancy was discovered. She was visiting her parents' house, (yes, again) and it was her sisters who suggested she take a test "just in case, to check, if maybe)...and she did. All the while at the house already...she came out of the bathroom and announced to her sisters, don't know if derickdillard was there or not, but they all found out WITH JILL, WHEN JILL FOUND OUT. They need to be careful with these stupid "suspense" headlines and storylines that have already been printed and accounted for months before airing. This show needs a new producer and writer...maybe stick with the truth for a change and stay in REAL EARTH time?

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Math problem: If you have 19 kids in general and only 18 live at home (at a time) and there are two parents and maybe grandma living there, then how many people actually live in TTC house? Correct answer: 20, with grandma 21

Michelle seemed to be surprised at say the austerity of Jessa's wedding plans. Considering she should know how limited her budget is and how Jim-Bob probably isn't willing to pitch in finances, what does she expect? It annoys in real life and on the wedding dress shows, etc. when anyone expects the bride and groom to increase the budget without offering to supply the funds. I know JimBob probably controls their finances but still!

Aunt Frieda?

Jessa: " Probably a guest room for us .....Maybe eventually a nursery" ...?!

I liked Ben's reaction to hearing Anna gave birth in the bathroom. (I originally typed to the bathroom haha)

I like that Jessa picked a dress that didn't need alterations. Better for Jana. Also impressed Jessa included friends in her wedding party.

Jim Bob (on modesty for men): "Normally the boys wear jeans and a shirt." Who knew pretty every guy is modest!

Considering I don't think Michelle actually needs a pregnancy test, I don't care that Jill "took" it.

Jim Bob wants 190 grandchildren! Good Grief!

The promos showed Michelle telling Ben's mom that she could be a grandma next year. It makes Jessa's line about the room someday being a nursery all the more interesting.

THANK YOU!!! The math had driven me crazy for-ev-er... At any given time they have never had 19 kids living at home, Josh was married and moved out before Josie was born... I don't remember if Jordyn was born or not by his wedding, but for sure Josie. Plus I feel like it's been reported that John David no longer lives there either (im really not sure if that's true so I may be wrong). So when they always proclaim how hard it is to get 19 people ready and attribute that for "duggar time" it makes me angry 1) more than half of the kids are old enough to be responsible for themselves 2) all 19 kids have never truly lived under the same roof. Thank you! *end rant*

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The already recounted how Jill's pregnancy was discovered. She was visiting her parents' house, (yes, again) and it was her sisters who suggested she take a test "just in case, to check, if maybe)...and she did. All the while at the house already...she came out of the bathroom and announced to her sisters, don't know if derickdillard was there or not, but they all found out WITH JILL, WHEN JILL FOUND OUT. They need to be careful with these stupid "suspense" headlines and storylines that have already been printed and accounted for months before airing. This show needs a new producer and writer...maybe stick with the truth for a change and stay in REAL EARTH time?

Yup. That's why I questioned when the pee stick had actually been peed on, since the picture was taken when they were wearing the same clothes they filmed the scene in. I have a feeling they taped the scene at the Dullards' house about how the family would react AFTER they filmed the actual announcement. 

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If Aunt Freida is Michelle's SISTER, why would Jim Bob call her "aunt"? She would be his sister in law...I think it silly that he refer to her as such. I thought maybe she was Grandma Duggar's sister or sis in law...I know, a small thing, but it was misleading to me.


Is it just me, or is it a bit strange, and yucky for them to take a photograph of a stick covered with Jill's dried up urine?...and then nationally post it too?

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Regarding Duggar Time: I think they would really hone up on that and be punctual at all costs: in keeping with the Duggar extremism, by being habitually late by 1-2 hours routinely, and having folks stand around waiting for them, isn't that an offense against the thou shalt not steal commandment? They are taking that time away from these people for no good reason other than being unorganized, which is also considered an ungodly trait.

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Is it just me, or is it a bit strange, and yucky for them to take a photograph of a stick covered with Jill's dried up urine?...and then nationally post it too?

This whole family has an extreme case of myopia and can't see the forest through the trees. They live in their tiny Duggar World and navel gaze at themselves and think we'd be delighted looking at their nasty dried up pregnancy test. After seeing what this family does to amuse themselves at the expense of potentially hurting animals, I find them disturbing. This backward family and their spouses quite deserve each other.

Edited by msblossom
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If Aunt Freida is Michelle's SISTER, why would Jim Bob call her "aunt"? She would be his sister in law...I think it silly that he refer to her as such. I thought maybe she was Grandma Duggar's sister or sis in law...I know, a small thing, but it was misleading to me.

Is it just me, or is it a bit strange, and yucky for them to take a photograph of a stick covered with Jill's dried up urine?...and then nationally post it too?

Well at least in my family, this is common to do. My Mother refers to her sister as 'Auntie M', out of habit I guess. It's not that uncommon if you're used to referring to your children's Aunt & uncle's as such, it just kind of sticks.

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I think they've developed the habit of referring to all the relatives from the habit of the children. "Cousin Amy" "Grandma Duggar" "Aunt Frieda". They seem to be pretty consistent about it.

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I just watched the ridiculous part when Jill claimed to have 'stolen' something from Michelle's bathroom.  Why are there pregnancy tests in Michelle's bathroom?  Either the 48 year old Michelle is still hoping to become pregnant, or TLC suggested this absurd 'plot'.

 

Sheesh..... Derrik's calling his brother and confusing him with 'your an uncle'.  Derrik seems really lame all of a sudden.  I liked the Nepal version of him better.

Nepal Derick was better than Duggarfied Derick, and Orginal Anna is better than Duggarfied Anna. I think Ben will stay more or less the same, but Jessa has got to stop "fixing" his hair. Helmet head is quite unattractive. Stealing the test was totally not fake IMO, she's baby crazy I definitely think she has a stock of pregnancy tests. I think they took a few takes to get the reaction right though.

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I don't think Anna has changed very much, except she's gained confidence based on the fact that since she's semi-famous, she assumes what she has to say has some worth.  I think she's very much the same person, it's just that she's an even smugger bitch now who won't shut the fuck up, because she married fundie royalty. 

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