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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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3 hours ago, annzeepark914 said:

I thought Boston Bib, and Butter lettuce were the same (or are close "cousins"!) They look alike and have soft leaves.

Could be.  I am horticulturally inept.

58 minutes ago, Browncoat said:

Most of the produce in my grocery store has stickers with the code on it.  Especially if there are multiple varieties, like with apples.  

Re ^this, I make certain that what I have chosen has that sticker, so as to eliminate any question for a likely in-training cashier.  

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1 hour ago, Browncoat said:

Most of the produce in my grocery store has stickers with the code on it.  Especially if there are multiple varieties, like with apples.  

Many things do, especially at the chains (I only go in those occasionally, doing most of my shopping at a family-owned market that buys from local farms), but about half of what I buy doesn't.  And if it's something that does, and I find one without, I choose that one, as I'm annoyed by peeling those buggers off.

I use mesh reusable produce bags (for the stuff I put in bags; a lot I leave loose), and for things that are by piece rather than by weight, I combine them in one bag.  So when the cashier picks up a mixed bag, I say, for example, "There's two green onion, one cilantro, one spinach, one arugula, one mint, and one Thai basil."  And she/he/they just type away as I talk, entering the codes from memory.

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19 minutes ago, Bastet said:

I use mesh reusable produce bags (for the stuff I put in bags; a lot I leave loose), and for things that are by piece rather than by weight, I combine them in one bag.  So when the cashier picks up a mixed bag, I say, for example, "There's two green onion, one cilantro, one spinach, one arugula, one mint, and one Thai basil."  And she/he/they just type away as I talk, entering the codes from memory.

I really don't belong in my current neighborhood. I belong in @Bastet's. 

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(edited)

I'll never forget for as long as I live that bananas are 4011. I've forgotten a lot of the other codes, but about every fourth customer bought bananas.

And yes, as @Bastet implied, don't put your different sold-by-weight produce in the same bag. They might cost the same, but they're coded differently and inventory tracking is important. People would get so bent out of shape when I'd have to take their zucchini and squash out of the bags. It also slowed me down.

Don't get me started on the coded open-bagged apples that people thought they could mix and match.

Edited by bilgistic
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One of the things I love about Wegman’s is that there are scales with printers for your produce. I have reusable mesh bags which makes it very hard to see the stickers on the produce inside. At Wegman’s I weigh the bag and print out the barcode for the bag. Easy, and no confusing kale with iceberg at the cash register.

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9 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I'll never forget for as long as I live that bananas are 4011. I've forgotten a lot of rhe other codes, but about every fourth customer bought bananas.

My daughter's first part -time job was as a cashier at Farm Boy.  I think that's a chain somewhat local to Ottawa.  Anyway the cashiers all had to memorize all the codes.  And of course the codes would get changed regularly, just to make it harder.  I wouldn't have lasted two days in that job!

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At risk of sounding like a broken record … I got an email this morning from a recruiter representing a well known search firm about a job he’s looking to fill.  It starts off telling me my resume stands out and I’m on their short list, tells me the job title with no details then proceeds to ask me to send him my resume if I’m interested.  (He has it so he wants me to send it to him?  Hmmm)
I know this firm and I know they’re legit but I’ve never sent them my resume nor have I ever spoken to them about any position that I could be qualified for.  I haven’t posted my resume anywhere recently so this guy is using a tired script to get people to respond.  
I am so tired of this approach.  I thought about responding to find out the details but I decided not to since I figure the guy is probably an idiot.  

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7 minutes ago, Cobb Salad said:

At risk of sounding like a broken record … I got an email this morning from a recruiter representing a well known search firm about a job he’s looking to fill.  It starts off telling me my resume stands out and I’m on their short list, tells me the job title with no details then proceeds to ask me to send him my resume if I’m interested.  (He has it so he wants me to send it to him?  Hmmm)
I know this firm and I know they’re legit but I’ve never sent them my resume nor have I ever spoken to them about any position that I could be qualified for.  I haven’t posted my resume anywhere recently so this guy is using a tired script to get people to respond.  
I am so tired of this approach.  I thought about responding to find out the details but I decided not to since I figure the guy is probably an idiot.  

You might want to let the firm know about this. It's possible it's a scam that someone is using a similar looking email address to get people's info.

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43 minutes ago, Katy M said:

You might want to let the firm know about this. It's possible it's a scam that someone is using a similar looking email address to get people's info.

Yes, and, even if it's not a scam, the firm might want to know they've got people who sound like scammers. 
And if the firm doesn't care that they sound like scammers, you probably don't want to work there anyway. 

Many years ago (decades) when I was between jobs, a friend offered me a job a New Age place cold calling people to send in samples of their poop to allegedly (not!) test for parasites and then sell them vitamins as a cure. I said no thanks. 
Shortly after that I started working for minimum wage and no benefits (not even Social Security) in a library. 
Eventually I got 2 college degrees and a salaried library job with benefits.

Edited by shapeshifter
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On 7/13/2021 at 12:39 PM, MissFeatherbottom said:

I'm not sure where you live but here in the South (I'm in Texas), we need the a/c for sure, and sometimes i will sit in my car to try to cool off (they keep grocery or any other stores here super hot).

I'm in Texas as well and they grocery stores are at a decent temp. Now small stores like Marshalls, Home Goods  no they are hot as hell

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20 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

I would never have taken a job like that.  I choke under pressure and have a piss poor memory.  The more pressure I am under the worse my memory gets.  I wouldn't last five seconds in a job like that without getting canned.

And yet people (not you, my dear icemiser69) treat cashiers as little better than trash cans on legs, never considering what the job takes.

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5 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

I would never have taken a job like that.  I choke under pressure and have a piss poor memory.  The more pressure I am under the worse my memory gets.  I wouldn't last five seconds in a job like that without getting canned.

Two of my daughters were grocery cashiers  when they were in high school and college. They’re 32 and 42 years old now, and still know the produce codes.
And both of them have careers in which working with numbers is an integral element.
    —math pun, but true 😉

Edited by shapeshifter
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3 hours ago, Katy M said:

You might want to let the firm know about this. It's possible it's a scam that someone is using a similar looking email address to get people's info.

Thanks for the input but I don’t think the person who contacted me is a fraud.  It was a message sent to me through my LinkedIn profile which I think he found and decided to contact me.  It’s one of several I’ve gotten over the past months from bad recruiters that follow the same pattern of I’ve got a slot to fill, your background is impressive, send me your resume and we’ll talk.  I don’t respond to them because of their piss-poor approach.  Ones I do respond to give some information about the the job first so I can decide myself and not send my information in to some black hole for who knows what.  

3 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

Yes, and, even if it's not a scam, the firm might want to know they've got people who sound like scammers. 
And if the firm doesn't care that they sound like scammers, you probably don't want to work there anyway. 

I suspect the person who contacted me is forced to fill some quota regarding how many leads they must generate to fill slots.  I wouldn’t be surprised if they were trained to do it this way by this search firm so IMO contacting them about this is a waste of time.  

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On 7/14/2021 at 11:28 AM, JTMacc99 said:

Ever since I got my gums fixed with some delightful time at the periodontist, I'm constantly annoyed by the little bits and pieces left behind in my teeth when I eat salad. 

I have gum issues and  I am trying to stay out of the periodontist and got a Water Pik ultra plus.  I got mine from Sams and it comes with a baby one for travel.  I  have never been a good flosser and this has been a game changer for me.  At the risk of TMI it’s very gratifying to see what it’s getting in the sink. Learning curve was easy. (I watched a YouTube vid prior just to see a person use it). This is not a paid endorsement but has made my dental visits much better since purchase!

To stay on topic I have a pet peeve of the phrase “Help me understand”.  My experience has shown it’s a jerk who is saying “You fucking idiot I am talking down to you so all parties on the email  know I think you’re below me”.   Maybe an outlier occurs where a person really means it- I am yet to see that use. 

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Going back to cashiers having to know all those produce codes, I just came from my local market, where I picked up some peanuts and eight types of produce.  None of those eight were among the things that have a sticker or band with the code on it, so the cashier had to know them all (and she did).  Because this recent discussion was on my mind, I took a bit of a glance around even at stuff I wasn't buying today, and very little of the produce I regularly buy does have the code on it anywhere - mostly just the apples. 

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On 7/15/2021 at 7:49 PM, Bastet said:

Going back to cashiers having to know all those produce codes, I just came from my local market, where I picked up some peanuts and eight types of produce.  None of those eight were among the things that have a sticker or band with the code on it, so the cashier had to know them all (and she did).  Because this recent discussion was on my mind, I took a bit of a glance around even at stuff I wasn't buying today, and very little of the produce I regularly buy does have the code on it anywhere - mostly just the apples. 

My grocery store has little placards for each bin of produce, with the price and the product code printed on it. At each end of the produce aisle, there are scales to weigh the produce, and you type in the product code, it calculates the price based on weight or asks you how many items, and prints out a scannable sticker to put on the bag of produce. I have some reusable mesh produce bags that have a designated place for the sticker. There are customers who can’t be bothered to do this, and then get annoyed if the cashier has to look up the product code. I’m mostly doing curbside pickup of groceries now, but when I shop in the store itself, I definitely print out the price stickers for my produce. 

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When you get something delivered & it's supposed to be "no contact" why does the delivery person keep standing at your door knocking on it?

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15 minutes ago, GaT said:

When you get something delivered & it's supposed to be "no contact" why does the delivery person keep standing at your door knocking on it?

I must be you in a parallel universe.  My peeve is delivery people who sneak an item on to the porch (often valuable, in an identifiable box, in the rain...) and don't ring/knock/send a text confirmation...  Now if your "no contact" person is waiting for you to open the door and sign for something, that's a peeve I can get behind.

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Just now, SoMuchTV said:

I must be you in a parallel universe.  My peeve is delivery people who sneak an item on to the porch (often valuable, in an identifiable box, in the rain...) and don't ring/knock/send a text confirmation...  Now if your "no contact" person is waiting for you to open the door and sign for something, that's a peeve I can get behind.

That's my universe, too.  I don't want someone to stand there waiting for me to answer, but I definitely want them to knock/ring to alert me to the presence of a package (I don't get text notifications, and the "your package has been delivered" email comes after it has been sitting out there a while).  USPS and UPS usually do, but FedEx is terrible about it. 

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On 7/15/2021 at 10:02 AM, WinnieWinkle said:

My daughter's first part -time job was as a cashier at Farm Boy.  I think that's a chain somewhat local to Ottawa.  Anyway the cashiers all had to memorize all the codes.  And of course the codes would get changed regularly, just to make it harder.  I wouldn't have lasted two days in that job!

Farm Boy isn't local to Ottawa anymore.  There are at least four or five stores in Toronto now and I think they're doing an Ontario (or maybe even national) expansion.   

As for cashiers ringing in incorrect items, I've caught that a few times.  The cashier said both items were the same price.  Having never worked in grocery retail, I was like...HUH?

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Just now, icemiser69 said:

I don't order anything via the internet, I only shop local.  But on occasion, the postal person does a double mail drop.  It would be nice if he rung the doorbell for the second mail drop.   I assume the second mail drop is a mail sorting issue, a letter gets mixed in another person's mail.   It doesn't happen often, but it does happen.

But, I was told the postman always rings twice.

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7 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

You have to watch them like a hawk, along with the grocery bag packers.   I don't like my dry goods, pasta, rice, etc,, anywhere near the frozen, cold, damp, items.  Plus, cookies and chips need to be packed on top of the bags.  We all know cookies and chips are part of the four basic food groups.

I have never seen the original movie, but I did see bits and pieces of the 1981 remake.

The original is way better.

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33 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

I don't order anything via the internet, I only shop local.  But on occasion, the postal person does a double mail drop.  It would be nice if he rung the doorbell for the second mail drop.   I assume the second mail drop is a mail sorting issue, a letter gets mixed in another person's mail.   It doesn't happen often, but it does happen.

About 50% of the items I order online are from local boutiques - I prefer local as well, but the pandemic, all the lockdowns (we only re-started indoor dining this past Friday), etc has meant that online has been my go-to.

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1 hour ago, icemiser69 said:

  It would be nice if he rung the doorbell for the second mail drop.   I assume the second mail drop is a mail sorting issue, a letter gets mixed in another person's mail.   It doesn't happen often, but it does happen.

Wow. Both in Illinois and now in Western NY I don’t even get mail delivery once every day. I think it’s down to about 4 days per week now. 
 

On Amazon and and some other delivery service websites you can type in delivery instructions. I was able to get a door bell ring that way a few times.

But, yeah, now that I’m past my prime, the Postman doesn’t ring once or twice. 

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3 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

You have to watch them like a hawk, along with the grocery bag packers.   I don't like my dry goods, pasta, rice, etc,, anywhere near the frozen, cold, damp, items.  Plus, cookies and chips need to be packed on top of the bags.  We all know cookies and chips are part of the four basic food groups.

I have never seen the original movie, but I did see bits and pieces of the 1981 remake.

Maybe I have OCD (i don't - but i have tendencies).  I write my grocery list by AISLES.. then put all the groceries at check out by what they are (frozen, etc).  Used to drive my ex crazy.. he used to say that is what bag-people were for.  I think i'm just helping them out and saving me from having soggy bread

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This sounds strange but I dislike it when people name their genitals and talk about them like they're an actual person.

Happened to me this morning when someone kept talking about how "Vivienne" had a bad day and was feeling sick and needed some extra TLC.

"Who's Vivienne?"

"My pussy."

Oh, ok.

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5 minutes ago, Boston said:

Maybe I have OCD (i don't - but i have tendencies).  I write my grocery list by AISLES.. then put all the groceries at check out by what they are (frozen, etc).  Used to drive my ex crazy.. he used to say that is what bag-people were for.  I think i'm just helping them out and saving me from having soggy bread

I do the same. Makes sense to me.

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2 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

This sounds strange but I dislike it when people name their genitals and talk about them like they're an actual person.

 

I don't care what anyone does in private but talking about their genitals, however cutely named, is not something I want someone doing in front of me.  Major "hey, boundaries people" thing for me.

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2 minutes ago, Boston said:

Maybe I have OCD (i don't - but i have tendencies).  I write my grocery list by AISLES.. then put all the groceries at check out by what they are (frozen, etc).  Used to drive my ex crazy.. he used to say that is what bag-people were for.  I think i'm just helping them out and saving me from having soggy bread

I started doing the grocery-list-by-aisle thing after I moved during the pandemic and was going to be shopping in a large, unfamiliar grocery store which I wanted to be in and out of as quickly as possible. But it also helps me not "miss" things on the list, which is a definite pet peeve of mine.
I also did a variation of this when I was married back in the 1980s if my ex was willing to stop at the store. He actually noticed that the list was in order by aisle and appreciated it.

IMO, a lot of conditions like OCD and ADHD etc. exist on a very long continuum, with everyone somewhere on the line, and the place where the majority live has been designated "normal."
Note: I am not a therapist or psychiatrist, and do not play one on TV, but I was a Reference Librarian for decades, which, like being a bartender, requires being a bit of a therapist at times.

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Just now, shapeshifter said:

I started doing the grocery-list-by-aisle thing after I moved during the pandemic and was going to be shopping in a large, unfamiliar grocery store which I wanted to be in and out of as quickly as possible. But it also helps me not "miss" things on the list, which is a definite pet peeve of mine.
I also did a variation of this when I was married back in the 1980s if my ex was willing to stop at the store. He actually noticed that the list was in order by aisle and appreciated it.

IMO, a lot of conditions like OCD and ADHD etc. exist on a very long continuum, with everyone somewhere on the line, and the place where the majority live has been designated "normal."
Note: I am not a therapist or psychiatrist, and do not play one on TV, but I was a Reference Librarian for decades, which, like being a bartender, requires being a bit of a therapist at times.

I completely agree with you.  i guess I just like (most)  things to be organized (and you're ex was nice for appreciating it)

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I'm married to the Clipboard King of America. He has clipboards all over the house (and magnifying glasses, but that's another story for another day). The one that hangs in the kitchen is the grocery-list clipboard. He used to print out a new one in a new font back when we still went shopping every week, but now we don't get a new one for a month or more, whenever we shop. We pencil in every item under its appropriate category as it runs low. (Or I do--that's where his organizational genius seems to stall out.) Grocery checkers and shoppers in line behind him ooh and aah over how clever he is. I'd be happy if he just didn't use things up and not tell me about it till I need something and find it isn't there anymore.

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2 minutes ago, Mondrianyone said:

I'd be happy if he just didn't use things up and not tell me about it till I need something and find it isn't there anymore.

Heh, that reminds me of my one-and-only ex of 30 years ago who would put empty milk and juice containers back in the refrigerator "to keep them fresh." 
Just one of the many peeves attached to my memory of being married.

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42 minutes ago, Boston said:

Maybe I have OCD (i don't - but i have tendencies).  I write my grocery list by AISLES.. then put all the groceries at check out by what they are (frozen, etc).  Used to drive my ex crazy.. he used to say that is what bag-people were for.  I think i'm just helping them out and saving me from having soggy bread

What drives me nuts is when the put all the heavy shit in the same bag. Cans, jugs of milk and juice. I can't even lift them. I beg the kids not to do it but hey still do it anyway.

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My spouse related pet peeve is that he has closure issues.  By which I mean he cannot shut a cupboard, a drawer or a door to save his life.  If we were ever to divorce and I have to give reasons this would lead the list!!  Second only to his inability to differentiate between the laundry basket and the floor right beside the laundry basket.

Just now, peacheslatour said:

What drives me nuts is when the put all the heavy shit in the same bag. Cans, jugs of milk and juice. I can't even lift them. I beg the kids not to do it but hey still do it anyway.

What bugs me is when I say "use as many bags as it takes" and they still put everything into one bag.  Hey I know I don't look like the richest woman in the world but trust me I can splurge an extra nickel or two for more bags at a grocery checkout!

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What bugs me is when I say "use as many bags as it takes" and they still put everything into one bag.  Hey I know I don't look like the richest woman in the world but trust me I can splurge an extra nickel or two for more bags at a grocery checkout!

So much THIS. I have eleventy million reusable canvas grocery bags. There is no shortage, no need to skimp. I don't mind a lot of bags. Jeez.

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23 minutes ago, WinnieWinkle said:

My spouse related pet peeve is that he has closure issues.

[therapist leans forward] Yes, and...?

24 minutes ago, WinnieWinkle said:

By which I mean he cannot shut a cupboard, a drawer or a door to save his life. 

😂😆😂🤣

 

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On 7/17/2021 at 9:21 PM, RealHousewife said:

People on YouTube. I swear, it attracts the nastiest people. It's especially annoying when they comment on videos that aren't for them. Even if I don't like a content creator, why go and bash them nonstop? Sheesh. 

YES!

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37 minutes ago, WinnieWinkle said:

My spouse related pet peeve is that he has closure issues.  By which I mean he cannot shut a cupboard, a drawer or a door to save his life.

My friend's husband has this.  When they first moved in together, on a daily basis she would walk into the kitchen and shout, "The poltergeists have been here again!"  He's better, but still does it a lot. 

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1 hour ago, Boston said:

Maybe I have OCD (i don't - but i have tendencies).  I write my grocery list by AISLES.. then put all the groceries at check out by what they are (frozen, etc).  

Doesn't sound like OCD to me, it sounds smart, I never thought of doing that.

40 minutes ago, WinnieWinkle said:

What bugs me is when I say "use as many bags as it takes" and they still put everything into one bag.  Hey I know I don't look like the richest woman in the world but trust me I can splurge an extra nickel or two for more bags at a grocery checkout!

Welcome to my world, I really don't understand why they do this, I don't care about the extra money, it's just some change, give me the damn bags. And when I say put everything in a bag, I mean the bottle of soda & detergent too. EVERYTHING.

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25 minutes ago, GaT said:

Doesn't sound like OCD to me, it sounds smart, I never thought of doing that.

Welcome to my world, I really don't understand why they do this, I don't care about the extra money, it's just some change, give me the damn bags. And when I say put everything in a bag, I mean the bottle of soda & detergent too. EVERYTHING.

and.. we're probably not weightlifters.  BIG pet peeve.

1 hour ago, peacheslatour said:

What drives me nuts is when the put all the heavy shit in the same bag. Cans, jugs of milk and juice. I can't even lift them. I beg the kids not to do it but hey still do it anyway.

I just wrote this to another response.  I end up with  PAIN every time i bring in the groceries. (and i said we're not weightlifters (i assume)

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Years (decades) ago I was a courtesy clerk at a major grocery chain after a failed stint at Target (I lasted 2 weeks at Target during the holidays before I quit). Both stores had comprehensive training on how to bag groceries. That's something they need to return to.

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1 hour ago, shapeshifter said:

Heh, that reminds me of my one-and-only ex of 30 years ago who would put empty milk and juice containers back in the refrigerator "to keep them fresh." 
Just one of the many peeves attached to my memory of being married.

My spouse will put something back in the fridge or cupboard with just a tiny bit left - like, 1 cracker in a box - because he “didn’t want to finish it off.” That is why all food in my house is decanted into clear containers so I can see what is left. Also, he can’t push in a chair to save his life. I think it’s genetic, because no one in his family can.

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1 hour ago, WinnieWinkle said:

Second only to his inability to differentiate between the laundry basket and the floor right beside the laundry basket.

I have posted, probably many times, about my childhood as the unpaid housekeeper in the family home, while my brother The Golden One had no chores whatsoever.   He was prone to throwing his dirty laundry toward the hamper, rather than walking over and opening the lid.  Finally, in a moment of rebellion, I announced I was not going to pick his dirty laundry off the floor, and the least he could do was put it in the proper place.  That lasted about a day, before I was told in forceful (yeah, physical force) terms that I would indeed pick up his dirty laundry, along with unrolling the sleeves, unballing the socks and emptying the pockets.   Cuz boys don't do that stuff, that's women's work. 

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8 minutes ago, Quof said:

Cuz boys don't do that stuff, that's women's work.

Ugh.  My parents were actually pretty enlightened for the time - but it still rankles when I remember my mother cooking special meals for my brother when he would come home late while we girls were expected to fend for ourselves.  The fending for ourselves part wasn't the problem needless to say - it was waiting on the Little Prince hand and foot that drove us nuts!  But at least she didn't expect his sisters to do the spoiling!

Edited by WinnieWinkle
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19 minutes ago, MargeGunderson said:

My spouse will put something back in the fridge or cupboard with just a tiny bit left - like, 1 cracker in a box - because he “didn’t want to finish it off.” That is why all food in my house is decanted into clear containers so I can see what is left. Also, he can’t push in a chair to save his life. I think it’s genetic, because no one in his family can.

Oh my gosh, that's one of the things you should learn in kindergarten.  I just decided to focus on making sure my children had that skill, so the issue isn't passed on to another generation.

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32 minutes ago, Quof said:

I have posted, probably many times, about my childhood as the unpaid housekeeper in the family home, while my brother The Golden One had no chores whatsoever.   He was prone to throwing his dirty laundry toward the hamper, rather than walking over and opening the lid.  Finally, in a moment of rebellion, I announced I was not going to pick his dirty laundry off the floor, and the least he could do was put it in the proper place.  That lasted about a day, before I was told in forceful (yeah, physical force) terms that I would indeed pick up his dirty laundry, along with unrolling the sleeves, unballing the socks and emptying the pockets.   Cuz boys don't do that stuff, that's women's work. 

I hope this person is now in prison or at least not living with anyone. 

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3 hours ago, Boston said:

Maybe I have OCD (i don't - but i have tendencies).  I write my grocery list by AISLES.. then put all the groceries at check out by what they are (frozen, etc).  Used to drive my ex crazy.. he used to say that is what bag-people were for.  I think i'm just helping them out and saving me from having soggy bread

It's been a long time since I shopped anywhere that bagged my groceries for me, but I do tend to arrange them on the conveyor belt in the order in which I want to bag them myself - chilled, frozen, papery items etc.

Occasionally there'll be kids doing the bagging, trying to raise money for their school or club and usually I'll just tell them that I'll give them a donation anyway, but to keep their hands off my bags. 

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