Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"

[PRgal]

14 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

OH, another thing! I have been having a rotten time lately finding vegan plain -- NOT vanilla -- yogurt! I use that to make salad dressings, so I clearly do not want vanilla. Plus, vanilla-flavored things always taste like "subliminal mint" to me. 

If you don’t want white dressing, there’s always avocado or hummus.  What about a white bean dip?   Or vegan mayo?  Different tasting notes but it will give you a creamy texture.  That said, I don’t really buy prepared sauces, save for tamari/soy saufe/faux soy sauce and ketchup.  Hummus if you count that, but I’m just too lazy to make my own.  Haha.  I make red pasta sauce from cans or jars of puréed tomatoes.  

[TattleTeeny]

Yeah, I use those too sometimes, but I am intent on creating a faux blue cheese and a faux ranch, as my favorites have since disappeared from the stores.

[ABay]

It's a twofer: peeve plus cooking.

I've lived in this house for 21 years now and every year a blackberry tree next door rains down blackberries mulberries on the walk next to the house, which is also where all the gardening equipment is, so I'm out there every day. I have to hose off my shoes before I come in and hose down the walk as best I can. There are a lot of flies and toward the end of the season the smell of fermenting fruit is quite powerful.

This year for the first time, since several branches are low enough to touch my head, I decided to gather some and maybe try a crisp or crumble. I've always felt a little guilty at letting all that fruit go to waste. So I culled a couple of cups and brought them in to rinse off. Bugs! Bugs everywhere! Like potato bugs but not. Gah!

I cleaned everything off and stuck the berries in the refrigerator. I still need to go through them and remove the tiny stems and throw out any that are too far gone. But bugs! Will I be able to eat the berries without gagging? Are they worth the trouble of gathering because *bugs* and the teeny tiny stems?

Edited June 24, 2021 by ABay
Mul- and black- are not the same.

[SoMuchTV]

following up on the dressings in the chit-chat thread...

[Browncoat]

38 minutes ago, ABay said:

It's a twofer: peeve plus cooking.

I've lived in this house for 21 years now and every year a blackberry tree next door rains down blackberries on the walk next to the house, which is also where all the gardening equipment is, so I'm out there every day. I have to hose off my shoes before I come in and hose down the walk as best I can. There are a lot of flies and toward the end of the season the smell of fermenting fruit is quite powerful.

This year for the first time, since several branches are low enough to touch my head, I decided to gather some and maybe try a crisp or crumble. I've always felt a little guilty at letting all that fruit go to waste. So I culled a couple of cups and brought them in to rinse off. Bugs! Bugs everywhere! Like potato bugs but not. Gah!

I cleaned everything off and stuck the berries in the refrigerator. I still need to go through them and remove the tiny stems and throw out any that are too far gone. But bugs! Will I be able to eat the berries without gagging? Are they worth the trouble of gathering because *bugs* and the teeny tiny stems?

Are you sure they are blackberries and not mulberries?  Either way, they are edible, but you need to wash them really well.

[ABay]

Thanks @Browncoat. They are mulberries. I'd always thought they were but then someone told me they were blackberries. Stick with your first answer! I've fixed the original post.

I've now read a couple of sites describing how to clean them thoroughly and how long they can be stored, so tomorrow I'll see what's fallen into the buckets I set out this afternoon and see how it goes.

Edited June 24, 2021 by ABay

[annzeepark914]

11 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

I was *Really* peeved by the *Very* noisy birds fornicating on the ledge outside my bedroom window starting at 5:30a.m. and getting louder for hours —the ledge having become available when my son-in-law graciously installed an air conditioner recently. 

ETA:   
Crap. One of the birds was just hovering and spying in my window, and when I banged again* the other 2 flew up and away with him/her.  So it’s a thruple?

————

*Don’t worry. I’m only banging lightly. The air conditioner isn’t going to fall out of the window. 
And, yes, it’s a second story window, so making the ledge less bird friendly would be difficult, and my son-in-law can’t do heights. 

Go buy a statue of an owl or hawk and place it on the AC ledge. Our neighbors have one on their deck & the birds never go near their deck 

[Hangin Out]

21 hours ago, ratgirlagogo said:

Damn. I checked Amazon after reading your post and was shocked to discover that yes, this famous film is out of print in region 1.  Incredible, and yet sadly not really surprising.  Yet another reason why I thank the gods every single day for Turner Classic Movies.

Hate to say, but it was just on either Turner or Movie Classics.  I was mad as a movie I was waiting for was just on too.  “Death on the Nile” .. no commercials.  I’ve been waiting forever and missed it.  If it was on Movie Classics, they repeat.  Turner doesn’t repeat, and they should.

[Cobb Salad]

22 hours ago, ratgirlagogo said:

Damn. I checked Amazon after reading your post and was shocked to discover that yes, this famous film is out of print in region 1.  Incredible, and yet sadly not really surprising.  Yet another reason why I thank the gods every single day for Turner Classic Movies.

 

1 hour ago, Hangin Out said:

Hate to say, but it was just on either Turner or Movie Classics.  I was mad as a movie I was waiting for was just on too.  “Death on the Nile” .. no commercials.  I’ve been waiting forever and missed it.  If it was on Movie Classics, they repeat.  Turner doesn’t repeat, and they should.

Wuthering Heights is currently available on the Watch TCM app.  Most but not all of the movies they broadcast are there to watch on demand for a number of days after it’s shown on TCM.  

[graybrown bird]

On 6/24/2021 at 2:01 PM, icemiser69 said:

Another Peeve:  An item that was once awesome, but for whatever reason, is no longer as good as it once was.

Yes!  Most recent example in my household is Feline Pine kitty litter.  Once was great, now barely okay.  WHY?  

[Calvada]

On 6/24/2021 at 3:30 PM, TattleTeeny said:

OH, another thing! I have been having a rotten time lately finding vegan plain -- NOT vanilla -- yogurt! I use that to make salad dressings, so I clearly do not want vanilla. Plus, vanilla-flavored things always taste like "subliminal mint" to me. 

I also dislike vanilla yogurt.  However, I don't like any flavored yogurt.  I eat plain yogurt with my own fruit added to it.  I once visited a friend in another state who knew I usually have plain yogurt with fruit for breakfast a couple days a week and she bought vanilla yogurt, because hey, that's the same as plain, right?  I appreciated her efforts but vanilla does not equal plain, it's a flavor.  I ate it one morning, hearing my mother's voice telling me when one is a guest in someone's home, one eats whatever they serve.  But I couldn't face it more than once during my 3-day visit.  I felt a bit guilty until I remembered all the tea I bought when she visited me that sat in my cupboard until I donated it to the break room at the office.  

Today's pet peeve - people driving in torrential rain without their headlights on.  

[Nordly Beaumont]

Bugs. Specifically bugs that fly into my throat. I've had a peanut butter sandwich and a large glass of iced tea and I swear I still feel it (logically I know it's gone, but somehow I still feel it!)

[TattleTeeny]

4 hours ago, graybrown bird said:

Yes!  Most recent example in my household is Feline Pine kitty litter.  Once was great, now barely okay.  WHY?  

This happened with one of my cat’s favorite toys! It was the Jackson Galaxy Ground Prey thing, which used to be made with a kind of solid but bouncy and flexible metal wire that was maybe the circumference of a drink stirrer straw. Now it’s made of little metal stringlike wires twisted together. Not only does it unravel, but I’d doesn’t move around the same way that my cat loved (or, to be honest, possibly hated, judging by how he voraciously tried to get it!).

Another peeve (though this feels more like flat-out rage): out of nowhere, my DVR (Optimum, aka “the devil”) is suddenly limiting how long we can pause a TV show. On top of that, even if you don’t “go over,” it will suddenly announce that it’s jumping back to real-time, so you end up missing a chunk of what you were watching. 

Edited June 26, 2021 by TattleTeeny

[shapeshifter]

2 hours ago, Nordly Beaumont said:

Bugs. Specifically bugs that fly into my throat. I've had a peanut butter sandwich and a large glass of iced tea and I swear I still feel it (logically I know it's gone, but somehow I still feel it!)

Well, the best I can offer regarding your post-bug swallowing sensation prognosis, @Nordly Beaumont, is that in 2004 I may have swallowed a bug that got in my water bottle at work during renovations, or I may have spit it out, and now, 17 years later, I can’t recall anymore. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Katy M]

5 hours ago, shapeshifter said:

Well, the best I can offer regarding your post-bug swallowing sensation prognosis, @Nordly Beaumont, is that in 2004 I may have swallowed a bug that got in my water bottle at work during renovations, or I may have spit it out, and now, 17 years later, I can’t recall anymore. 🤷🏻‍♀️

So, you didn't then swallow  a spider, bird, cat, dog, goat, and horse?

[shapeshifter]

3 hours ago, Katy M said:

So, you didn't then swallow  a spider, bird, cat, dog, goat, and horse?

Correct. But I *might* have swallowed a fly. 😮
--point being that in 17 years the details are blocked from memory. 🙃

[Lady Whistleup]

A grammar pet peeve: I hate it when people say "A BIPOC." BIPOC is an adjective, not a noun. 

This irked me during a seminar I attended at work where the faciliator said "I want to hear from a BIPOC." 

It truly set my teeth on edge. It's "I want to hear from BIPOC perspectives," not just "I want to hear from a BIPOC."

[Blergh]

24 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

A grammar pet peeve: I hate it when people say "A BIPOC." BIPOC is an adjective, not a noun. 

This irked me during a seminar I attended at work where the faciliator said "I want to hear from a BIPOC." 

It truly set my teeth on edge. It's "I want to hear from BIPOC perspectives," not just "I want to hear from a BIPOC."

What does BIPOC mean?

[Lady Whistleup]

3 minutes ago, Blergh said:

What does BIPOC mean?

Black, Indigenous and other People of Color. It's an adjective. I hate it when it's used as a noun now. 

I also hate it when people say "BIPOCS and Asians." Asians are included in the "Other POC" part of the acronym.

These little grammar things drive me nuts.

Edited June 27, 2021 by Lady Whistleup

[annzeepark914]

Well, I learned something new (to me) today: BIPOC. Haven't heard it on TV nor read about it in newspapers, magazines, etc. Maybe it's currently making the rounds of staff conferences, workshops, or, maybe it will never be widely used. I know that I'd be hesitant to use it.

[Bastet]

It became widely used last year, generating media coverage.  The BIPOC Project.

[Lady Whistleup]

23 minutes ago, annzeepark914 said:

Well, I learned something new (to me) today: BIPOC. Haven't heard it on TV nor read about it in newspapers, magazines, etc. Maybe it's currently making the rounds of staff conferences, workshops, or, maybe it will never be widely used. I know that I'd be hesitant to use it.

It's a bit like "Latinx" -- not really used in the vernacular sense but a big workshop word. 

[bilgistic]

It has been A WEEK.

We left at 9:30 last Sunday morning to go visit my boyfriend's sister/brother-in-law/parents in the Wilmington area. We hadn't seen them since February 2020. My catsitter came to feed the girls that evening and sent me a picture of a notice left by the contractor that our apartment complex had hired to do "renovations". The notice said they were starting Monday morning, and we had to remove everything from our kitchen, with roughly 12 hours' notice.

My boyfriend called the leasing office Sunday night and Monday morning (the contractor's voice mail was full, LOLOLOL) and had them put off the work until Wednesday, so when we got home Tuesday, we spent the evening removing everything from the kitchen. The renovations were to be painting the cabinets, replacing the cabinet doors and drawer fronts, and tiling behind the stove.

I closed the cats up in the bathroom on Wednesday when I left for work, and sure enough, the contractors don't do any work that day. They said the office told them they couldn't start until Thursday, which is hot garbage. My boyfriend called them Wednesday morning to tell them again that they could come then (after telling them when we were in Wilmington that we'd be ready on Wednesday). Oh, and the contractor said they "might not have the cabinet doors in on Friday." OH OKAY. Who starts a job without having all the materials? I made the mistake of reading their reviews on Google Sunday night in bed. We're not alone in our experience.

On Thursday, I locked the cats up in our tiny bathroom again and came home to sopping wet paint on the cabinets and the worst painting job I've ever seen--bubbles, different thickness in different areas, drips, chipped off chunks of the popcorn ceiling where the cabinets meet the ceiling. Like, I could do a better job and I've only painted once. I let the cats out and one of them immediately had to touch the paint because of course they did, and now there are partial paw prints on the kitchen floor. And then the other cat had to inspect and smoosh the paint right next to where the other one did.

And Friday...my 95-year-old grandmother died. We kind of knew it was coming, but that doesn't really make it easier. She fell on November 30 at home and broke her pelvis. Went to a rehab center and was healing okay, then moved to an assisted living center. She wasn't thriving there, because she'd lived alone since my grandpa died in December 2000, but was doing OK. Mom and my aunt were doing all they could for her in the midst of, you know, A GLOBAL PANDEMIC.

She fell again at the assisted living center about two weeks ago and broke a femur. She had emergency surgery and she rallied for a bit, but then went downhill (problems with blood pressure and oxygen level) and had to be admitted to the ER Thursday. My mom and aunt and a cousin/aunt's son were with her Friday morning when she passed. I was at work when Mom called me two hours later. My boss and my boss's boss are actually being human and letting me take time, which is bizarre. I'm like, "Where have these people been over the last year?" But anyway. Funeral's on Tuesday.

This is rough because I grew up with my grandma and have a lot of wonderful memories. I changed my name in 2006 from my bio father's to my grandparents'/Mom's maiden name because they are my real family (bio father was/is a deadbeat). My grandma was my last living grandparent and I kind of thought she'd live forever, and at 95, she almost did! She was a force and the world feels different without her.

Long story longer, the tile job was done Friday and it's also terrible. We put most of our stuff back in the cabinets yesterday (but not the drawers because no fronts🙃) because one of the workers said we could once the paint dried. It smells AWFUL in here and nothing helps--vinegar, coffee grounds, candles, burning essential oils, opening windows in 85°+ heat. Still no cabinet doors. SO YEAH...I haven't been able to relax in my home after driving 1.75 hours roundtrip to work daily to sit in an office and do the same thing I did at home...and my grandma dying. GOOD TIMES.

[peacheslatour]

49 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

It has been A WEEK.

We left at 9:30 last Sunday morning to go visit my boyfriend's sister/brother-in-law/parents in the Wilmington area. We hadn't seen them since February 2020. My catsitter came to feed the girls that evening and sent me a picture of a notice left by the contractor that our apartment complex had hired to do "renovations". The notice said they were starting Monday morning, and we had to remove everything from our kitchen, with roughly 12 hours' notice.

My boyfriend called the leasing office Sunday night and Monday morning (the contractor's voice mail was full, LOLOLOL) and had them put off the work until Wednesday, so when we got home Tuesday, we spent the evening removing everything from the kitchen. The renovations were to be painting the cabinets, replacing the cabinet doors and drawer fronts, and tiling behind the stove.

I closed the cats up in the bathroom on Wednesday when I left for work, and sure enough, the contractors don't do any work that day. They said the office told them they couldn't start until Thursday, which is hot garbage. My boyfriend called them Wednesday morning to tell them again that they could come then (after telling them when we were in Wilmington that we'd be ready on Wednesday). Oh, and the contractor said they "might not have the cabinet doors in on Friday." OH OKAY. Who starts a job without having all the materials? I made the mistake of reading their reviews on Google Sunday night in bed. We're not alone in our experience.

On Thursday, I locked the cats up in our tiny bathroom again and came home to sopping wet paint on the cabinets and the worst painting job I've ever seen--bubbles, different thickness in different areas, drips, chipped off chunks of the popcorn ceiling where the cabinets meet the ceiling. Like, I could do a better job and I've only painted once. I let the cats out and one of them immediately had to touch the paint because of course they did, and now there are partial paw prints on the kitchen floor. And then the other cat had to inspect and smoosh the paint right next to where the other one did.

And Friday...my 95-year-old grandmother died. We kind of knew it was coming, but that doesn't really make it easier. She fell on November 30 at home and broke her pelvis. Went to a rehab center and was healing okay, then moved to an assisted living center. She wasn't thriving there, because she'd lived alone since my grandpa died in December 2000, but was doing OK. Mom and my aunt were doing all they could for her in the midst of, you know, A GLOBAL PANDEMIC.

She fell again at the assisted living center about two weeks ago and broke a femur. She had emergency surgery and she rallied for a bit, but then went downhill (problems with blood pressure and oxygen level) and had to be admitted to the ER Thursday. My mom and aunt and a cousin/aunt's son were with her Friday morning when she passed. I was at work when Mom called me two hours later. My boss and my boss's boss are actually being human and letting me take time, which is bizarre. I'm like, "Where have these people been over the last year?" But anyway. Funeral's on Tuesday.

This is rough because I grew up with my grandma and have a lot of wonderful memories. I changed my name in 2006 from my bio father's to my grandparents'/Mom's maiden name because they are my real family (bio father was/is a deadbeat). My grandma was my last living grandparent and I kind of thought she'd live forever, and at 95, she almost did! She was a force and the world feels different without her.

Long story longer, the tile job was done Friday and it's also terrible. We put most of our stuff back in the cabinets yesterday (but not the drawers because no fronts🙃) because one of the workers said we could once the paint dried. It smells AWFUL in here and nothing helps--vinegar, coffee grounds, candles, burning essential oils, opening windows in 85°+ heat. Still no cabinet doors. SO YEAH...I haven't been able to relax in my home after driving 1.75 hours roundtrip to work daily to sit in an office and do the same thing I did at home...and my grandma dying. GOOD TIMES.

Jesus, what a terrible week. I'm so sorry for the loss of your beloved grandma. 

[GaT]

1 hour ago, Lady Whistleup said:

It's a bit like "Latinx" -- not really used in the vernacular sense but a big workshop word. 

The term "Latinx" confuses the hell out of me. Why isn't Spain "Latinx"?

51 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

And Friday...my 95-year-old grandmother died. We kind of knew it was coming, but that doesn't really make it easier. She fell on November 30 at home and broke her pelvis. Went to a rehab center and was healing okay, then moved to an assisted living center. She wasn't thriving there, because she'd lived alone since my grandpa died in December 2000, but was doing OK. Mom and my aunt were doing all they could for her in the midst of, you know, A GLOBAL PANDEMIC.

She fell again at the assisted living center about two weeks ago and broke a femur. She had emergency surgery and she rallied for a bit, but then went downhill (problems with blood pressure and oxygen level) and had to be admitted to the ER Thursday. My mom and aunt and a cousin/aunt's son were with her Friday morning when she passed. I was at work when Mom called me two hours later. My boss and my boss's boss are actually being human and letting me take time, which is bizarre. I'm like, "Where have these people been over the last year?" But anyway. Funeral's on Tuesday.

This is rough because I grew up with my grandma and have a lot of wonderful memories. I changed my name in 2006 from my bio father's to my grandparents'/Mom's maiden name because they are my real family (bio father was/is a deadbeat). My grandma was my last living grandparent and I kind of thought she'd live forever, and at 95, she almost did! She was a force and the world feels different without her.

Long story longer, the tile job was done Friday and it's also terrible. We put most of our stuff back in the cabinets yesterday (but not the drawers because no fronts🙃) because one of the workers said we could once the paint dried. It smells AWFUL in here and nothing helps--vinegar, coffee grounds, candles, burning essential oils, opening windows in 85°+ heat. Still no cabinet doors. SO YEAH...I haven't been able to relax in my home after driving 1.75 hours roundtrip to work daily to sit in an office and do the same thing I did at home...and my grandma dying. GOOD TIMES.

Sorry to hear about your grandmother, I'm sure you all did the best you could for her in the middle of a pandemic.

Watch out with the essential oils, they're toxic to cats.

Edited June 27, 2021 by GaT

[supposebly]

55 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

It smells AWFUL in here and nothing helps--vinegar, coffee grounds, candles, burning essential oils, opening windows in 85°+ heat. Still no cabinet doors. SO YEAH...I haven't been able to relax in my home after driving 1.75 hours roundtrip to work daily to sit in an office and do the same thing I did at home...and my grandma dying. GOOD TIMES.

I'm so sorry about your grandma. It sounds she lived a good life and loved and was loved very much. I have a "grandma" that is really the mother of a good friend of mine and she's the same age. I expect her to die any day but when it will happen, it will be hard. 

My best wishes and my God! that paint job sounds ridiculous and I am wondering about the smell too. I think all that will help is keeping the windows open as much as possible. And is safe with the cats hoping you have screens.

Why did the notification come so late? Your landlord's fault?

[peacheslatour]

Quote

Why did the notification come so late? Your landlord's fault?

Yeah, the whole outfit sounds like a scam.

[WinnieWinkle]

@bilgistic -  I'm so sorry about your grandmother and the botched kitchen job!  With regard to the odour - we had a similar issue with a stain we put down on some basement stairs.  It smelled awful and took about a month to go away.

Edited June 27, 2021 by WinnieWinkle

[PRgal]

2 hours ago, annzeepark914 said:

Well, I learned something new (to me) today: BIPOC. Haven't heard it on TV nor read about it in newspapers, magazines, etc. Maybe it's currently making the rounds of staff conferences, workshops, or, maybe it will never be widely used. I know that I'd be hesitant to use it.

I don't use it.  I refuse to use it.  In fact, I think it "others" some groups, particularly Asians and Hispanics - LITERALLY (you're not Black or Indigenous, so you're POC, and therefore "everyone else").  However, I've been bullied and shamed by some in DE&I (diversity, equity and inclusion) groups for refusing to do so.  Some of these groups are becoming cults and I'm not exaggerating.  I have YET to find a group where I can feel safe to talk about my experiences, views and how I think we can be more inclusive (which includes offering better translation/interpretation services for those who don't speak English or French as well as mental health services for people like me who are "in between" cultures.  It's often really stressful trying to explain things to people particularly older generations when you lack the linguistic skills.  Even people like me who speak reasonable Cantonese don't have the vocabulary to talk about mental health, child rearing and most importantly, food avoidances.  Most seem to understand allergies or avoiding foods for religious reasons, but you're vegan for ethical reasons?  They'll think you're high maintenance.

[peacheslatour]

35 minutes ago, PRgal said:

I don't use it.  I refuse to use it.  In fact, I think it "others" some groups, particularly Asians and Hispanics - LITERALLY (you're not Black or Indigenous, so you're POC, and therefore "everyone else").  However, I've been bullied and shamed by some in DE&I (diversity, equity and inclusion) groups for refusing to do so.  Some of these groups are becoming cults and I'm not exaggerating.  I have YET to find a group where I can feel safe to talk about my experiences, views and how I think we can be more inclusive (which includes offering better translation/interpretation services for those who don't speak English or French as well as mental health services for people like me who are "in between" cultures.  It's often really stressful trying to explain things to people particularly older generations when you lack the linguistic skills.  Even people like me who speak reasonable Cantonese don't have the vocabulary to talk about mental health, child rearing and most importantly, food avoidances.  Most seem to understand allergies or avoiding foods for religious reasons, but you're vegan for ethical reasons?  They'll think you're high maintenance.

I've found Two X Chromosomes on Reddit to be very welcoming.

[Bastet]

1 hour ago, GaT said:

The term "Latinx" confuses the hell out of me.

It just replaces the traditional gender-based suffixes with something universal, to include non-binary people.

1 hour ago, GaT said:

Why isn't Spain "Latinx"?

Spain isn't Latin America, so it's Spanish rather than Latinx when talking about its people.

@bilgistic, I'm sorry to hear about the death of your grandmother. 

[GaT]

5 minutes ago, Bastet said:

It just replaces the traditional gender-based suffixes with something universal, to include non-binary people.

 

"Latinx" has something to do with what gender people identify as? Now I'm really confused.

[Bastet]

11 minutes ago, GaT said:

"Latinx" has something to do with what gender people identify as? Now I'm really confused.

The Spanish language uses Latino for men and Latina for women.  Some use Latinx as a replacement term for all Latin Americans, rather than differentiating based on gender (especially using a binary system that leaves some people out).  Here's a Time article from a couple of years ago.

[bilgistic]

1 hour ago, supposebly said:

I'm so sorry about your grandma. It sounds she lived a good life and loved and was loved very much. I have a "grandma" that is really the mother of a good friend of mine and she's the same age. I expect her to die any day but when it will happen, it will be hard. 

My best wishes and my God! that paint job sounds ridiculous and I am wondering about the smell too. I think all that will help is keeping the windows open as much as possible. And is safe with the cats hoping you have screens.

Why did the notification come so late? Your landlord's fault?

I'm very wary of the cats with the window screens. It's really too hot to have the windows open, but when I do, I open them only just enough so that they can't fit their heads through. If they can get a head through, they can get their bodies through!

I feel so bad about the girls' and their little respiratory systems right now. I don't want to stress them more by keeping them locked up in the bedroom or bathroom if I don't have to, since this whole thing has been upsetting for them. They aren't eating as much. I'm like them and I crave routine.

The contractor came and measured several weeks ago and I asked when the work was going to be done, as the notice (left by the management/leasing office) for THAT made it seem like it was happening then. The contractor said, "About a month and a half." Then the notice for the actual work was left by the contractor. The leasing office says they are problematic, and the management (recent buyout/acquisition) hired them. Still, it's the leasing office's job to be the face of the company and liaise between tenants and management. I've no doubt the management failed to inform the leasing office what was happening (having known of multi-family ownership through my work in commercial real estate), but the leasing office had to know the work was happening at some point and needed to "manage up."

1 hour ago, peacheslatour said:

Yeah, the whole outfit sounds like a scam.

Indeed. There are dozens of Google reviews for the contractor that say that they've done this shoddy work in apartment complexes all over the Southeast. It's darkly funny--a bunch of one-star reviews from tenants and pictures of their work and five-star reviews from obviously multi-family complex ownership/management who talk about how "reliable" they are and what a "good job" they do. I'll PM you their name and pictures if you want to know who NOT to hire for your renovations.

Thanks, all, for the kindness re: my grandma. We're going to get through it.

Edited June 27, 2021 by bilgistic

[Lady Whistleup]

This reminds me of a convo I had with a rather spacey, woo-woo friend of mine:

"I'm African."

"But you're Indonesian."

"But I was an Egyptian goddess in my past life."

"Uh, ok."

[peacheslatour]

51 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

This reminds me of a convo I had with a rather spacey, woo-woo friend of mine:

"I'm African."

"But you're Indonesian."

"But I was an Egyptian goddess in my past life."

"Uh, ok."

Not even a princess or a queen. A goddess. Okay.

[Gramto6]

3 hours ago, bilgistic said:

It has been A WEEK.

We left at 9:30 last Sunday morning to go visit my boyfriend's sister/brother-in-law/parents in the Wilmington area. We hadn't seen them since February 2020. My catsitter came to feed the girls that evening and sent me a picture of a notice left by the contractor that our apartment complex had hired to do "renovations". The notice said they were starting Monday morning, and we had to remove everything from our kitchen, with roughly 12 hours' notice.

My boyfriend called the leasing office Sunday night and Monday morning (the contractor's voice mail was full, LOLOLOL) and had them put off the work until Wednesday, so when we got home Tuesday, we spent the evening removing everything from the kitchen. The renovations were to be painting the cabinets, replacing the cabinet doors and drawer fronts, and tiling behind the stove.

I closed the cats up in the bathroom on Wednesday when I left for work, and sure enough, the contractors don't do any work that day. They said the office told them they couldn't start until Thursday, which is hot garbage. My boyfriend called them Wednesday morning to tell them again that they could come then (after telling them when we were in Wilmington that we'd be ready on Wednesday). Oh, and the contractor said they "might not have the cabinet doors in on Friday." OH OKAY. Who starts a job without having all the materials? I made the mistake of reading their reviews on Google Sunday night in bed. We're not alone in our experience.

On Thursday, I locked the cats up in our tiny bathroom again and came home to sopping wet paint on the cabinets and the worst painting job I've ever seen--bubbles, different thickness in different areas, drips, chipped off chunks of the popcorn ceiling where the cabinets meet the ceiling. Like, I could do a better job and I've only painted once. I let the cats out and one of them immediately had to touch the paint because of course they did, and now there are partial paw prints on the kitchen floor. And then the other cat had to inspect and smoosh the paint right next to where the other one did.

And Friday...my 95-year-old grandmother died. We kind of knew it was coming, but that doesn't really make it easier. She fell on November 30 at home and broke her pelvis. Went to a rehab center and was healing okay, then moved to an assisted living center. She wasn't thriving there, because she'd lived alone since my grandpa died in December 2000, but was doing OK. Mom and my aunt were doing all they could for her in the midst of, you know, A GLOBAL PANDEMIC.

She fell again at the assisted living center about two weeks ago and broke a femur. She had emergency surgery and she rallied for a bit, but then went downhill (problems with blood pressure and oxygen level) and had to be admitted to the ER Thursday. My mom and aunt and a cousin/aunt's son were with her Friday morning when she passed. I was at work when Mom called me two hours later. My boss and my boss's boss are actually being human and letting me take time, which is bizarre. I'm like, "Where have these people been over the last year?" But anyway. Funeral's on Tuesday.

This is rough because I grew up with my grandma and have a lot of wonderful memories. I changed my name in 2006 from my bio father's to my grandparents'/Mom's maiden name because they are my real family (bio father was/is a deadbeat). My grandma was my last living grandparent and I kind of thought she'd live forever, and at 95, she almost did! She was a force and the world feels different without her.

Long story longer, the tile job was done Friday and it's also terrible. We put most of our stuff back in the cabinets yesterday (but not the drawers because no fronts🙃) because one of the workers said we could once the paint dried. It smells AWFUL in here and nothing helps--vinegar, coffee grounds, candles, burning essential oils, opening windows in 85°+ heat. Still no cabinet doors. SO YEAH...I haven't been able to relax in my home after driving 1.75 hours roundtrip to work daily to sit in an office and do the same thing I did at home...and my grandma dying. GOOD TIMES.

So sorry for the loss of your dear grandma.  And the horrible experience of the remodel. No one deserves to go through all that. (((hugs)))

[PRgal]

30 minutes ago, peacheslatour said:

Not even a princess or a queen. A goddess. Okay.

🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

 

[Bastet]

Yeah, I love how everyone who claims to have had a past life was something fabulous.  You never hear, "I was a leech collector in a previous life."

[PRgal]

43 minutes ago, Bastet said:

Yeah, I love how everyone who claims to have had a past life was something fabulous.  You never hear, "I was a leech collector in a previous life."

Maybe I should claim I was the Empress Dowager in my past life.  I do a good duck face.

[Anela]

6 hours ago, bilgistic said:

It has been A WEEK.

We left at 9:30 last Sunday morning to go visit my boyfriend's sister/brother-in-law/parents in the Wilmington area. We hadn't seen them since February 2020. My catsitter came to feed the girls that evening and sent me a picture of a notice left by the contractor that our apartment complex had hired to do "renovations". The notice said they were starting Monday morning, and we had to remove everything from our kitchen, with roughly 12 hours' notice.

My boyfriend called the leasing office Sunday night and Monday morning (the contractor's voice mail was full, LOLOLOL) and had them put off the work until Wednesday, so when we got home Tuesday, we spent the evening removing everything from the kitchen. The renovations were to be painting the cabinets, replacing the cabinet doors and drawer fronts, and tiling behind the stove.

I closed the cats up in the bathroom on Wednesday when I left for work, and sure enough, the contractors don't do any work that day. They said the office told them they couldn't start until Thursday, which is hot garbage. My boyfriend called them Wednesday morning to tell them again that they could come then (after telling them when we were in Wilmington that we'd be ready on Wednesday). Oh, and the contractor said they "might not have the cabinet doors in on Friday." OH OKAY. Who starts a job without having all the materials? I made the mistake of reading their reviews on Google Sunday night in bed. We're not alone in our experience.

On Thursday, I locked the cats up in our tiny bathroom again and came home to sopping wet paint on the cabinets and the worst painting job I've ever seen--bubbles, different thickness in different areas, drips, chipped off chunks of the popcorn ceiling where the cabinets meet the ceiling. Like, I could do a better job and I've only painted once. I let the cats out and one of them immediately had to touch the paint because of course they did, and now there are partial paw prints on the kitchen floor. And then the other cat had to inspect and smoosh the paint right next to where the other one did.

And Friday...my 95-year-old grandmother died. We kind of knew it was coming, but that doesn't really make it easier. She fell on November 30 at home and broke her pelvis. Went to a rehab center and was healing okay, then moved to an assisted living center. She wasn't thriving there, because she'd lived alone since my grandpa died in December 2000, but was doing OK. Mom and my aunt were doing all they could for her in the midst of, you know, A GLOBAL PANDEMIC.

She fell again at the assisted living center about two weeks ago and broke a femur. She had emergency surgery and she rallied for a bit, but then went downhill (problems with blood pressure and oxygen level) and had to be admitted to the ER Thursday. My mom and aunt and a cousin/aunt's son were with her Friday morning when she passed. I was at work when Mom called me two hours later. My boss and my boss's boss are actually being human and letting me take time, which is bizarre. I'm like, "Where have these people been over the last year?" But anyway. Funeral's on Tuesday.

This is rough because I grew up with my grandma and have a lot of wonderful memories. I changed my name in 2006 from my bio father's to my grandparents'/Mom's maiden name because they are my real family (bio father was/is a deadbeat). My grandma was my last living grandparent and I kind of thought she'd live forever, and at 95, she almost did! She was a force and the world feels different without her.

Long story longer, the tile job was done Friday and it's also terrible. We put most of our stuff back in the cabinets yesterday (but not the drawers because no fronts🙃) because one of the workers said we could once the paint dried. It smells AWFUL in here and nothing helps--vinegar, coffee grounds, candles, burning essential oils, opening windows in 85°+ heat. Still no cabinet doors. SO YEAH...I haven't been able to relax in my home after driving 1.75 hours roundtrip to work daily to sit in an office and do the same thing I did at home...and my grandma dying. GOOD TIMES.

I'm so sorry about the loss of your grandma. <3

[ratgirlagogo]

4 hours ago, Bastet said:

The Spanish language uses Latino for men and Latina for women.  Some use Latinx as a replacement term for all Latin Americans, rather than differentiating based on gender (especially using a binary system that leaves some people out).  Here's a Time article from a couple of years ago.

I don't like it because it can barely be pronounced in Spanish.   As English speakers we already have the word Latin which was used before the period starting around 50 years ago when it began to be felt that using Latino/Latina was more culturally respectful.  If we're going to do this I'd prefer reintroducing the word Latin, in the same way that the practice of referring to people as they/them when you don't want to indicate the gender is a well-established English useage and thus flows easily in conversation.

English is relatively gender-neutral to begin with - unlike Spanish in which every single living thing and inanimate object has a gender.  

[PRgal]

17 minutes ago, ratgirlagogo said:

I don't like it because it can barely be pronounced in Spanish.   As English speakers we already have the word Latin which was used before the period starting around 50 years ago when it began to be felt that using Latino/Latina was more culturally respectful.  If we're going to do this I'd prefer reintroducing the word Latin, in the same way that the practice of referring to people as they/them when you don't want to indicate the gender is a well-established English useage and thus flows easily in conversation.

English is relatively gender-neutral to begin with - unlike Spanish in which every single living thing and inanimate object has a gender.  

Exactly.  Though some people might not want to use "Latin" since it's a classical language the Romans used a few thousand years ago. 

Question:  if a parent's sibling is non-binary, is the correct term then "parsib," as in parent's sibling (or momsib/dadsib if mom and dad identify with a gender)?  And the parsib's spouse who is also non-binary then a parsib-in-law?  So Parsib Alex and Parsib-in-Law Nic?  

[Lady Whistleup]

3 hours ago, Bastet said:

Yeah, I love how everyone who claims to have had a past life was something fabulous.  You never hear, "I was a leech collector in a previous life."

Forget leech. No one ever said "I was a waitress in my past life." It's always something magical and exotic.

[TattleTeeny]

5 hours ago, Bastet said:

Yeah, I love how everyone who claims to have had a past life was something fabulous.  You never hear, "I was a leech collector in a previous life."

Almost like how all ghosts seem to be in old-timey garb. No one is ever haunted by someone in ‘80s workout gear or “power suit.”

[Lady Whistleup]

3 hours ago, ratgirlagogo said:

I don't like it because it can barely be pronounced in Spanish.   As English speakers we already have the word Latin which was used before the period starting around 50 years ago when it began to be felt that using Latino/Latina was more culturally respectful.  If we're going to do this I'd prefer reintroducing the word Latin, in the same way that the practice of referring to people as they/them when you don't want to indicate the gender is a well-established English useage and thus flows easily in conversation.

English is relatively gender-neutral to begin with - unlike Spanish in which every single living thing and inanimate object has a gender.  

I actually find the term "Latinx" to be sort of odd because it's awkward to pronounce in both English AND Spanish. And it kind of reminds me of how very often people have a way of ignoring linguistic traditions in the urge to be more "enlightened." 

But anyway, back to the grammar, "a Latinx" drives me as nuts as "a BIPOC." Because these are adjectives and not nouns. And that applies to people who say "I'm a Latino" too. No, it's "I'm Latino." It's annoying when people mix up nouns and adjectives.

[EtheltoTillie]

I’m confused about BIPOC. It’s an acronym, so I don’t think it’s an adjective or a noun. I never hear it spoken, only see it written. 

[Katy M]

1 hour ago, GussieK said:

I’m confused about BIPOC. It’s an acronym, so I don’t think it’s an adjective or a noun. I never hear it spoken, only see it written. 

It stand for black, indigenous and people of color, so I would actually think it would be a noun, because if you spell it out, it's a noun.  But, that's just my take on it.

[JTMacc99]

12 hours ago, Bastet said:

Yeah, I love how everyone who claims to have had a past life was something fabulous.  You never hear, "I was a leech collector in a previous life."

I highly recommend visiting the Past Lives Pavilion from the 1991 movie Defending Your Life with Albert Brooks and Meryl Streep to get the real story.

[Blergh]

20 hours ago, Lady Whistleup said:

Black, Indigenous and other People of Color. It's an adjective. I hate it when it's used as a noun now. 

I also hate it when people say "BIPOCS and Asians." Asians are included in the "Other POC" part of the acronym.

These little grammar things drive me nuts.

Thanks for the explanation but, as long as we've brought up grammar. Technically, this new acronym (that I'm not sure how much or IF it will still be used in another ten years) features another grammatic pet peeve: Shouldn't be spelt 'BIPoC' since the 'o' is the first letter comprising the word 'of' and 'of' itself is an article ? Articles are NOT supposed to be capitalized. Just wondering.