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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


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Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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3 minutes ago, auntlada said:

The children are not the teachers' or staff's friends. They are students. Someday when they have graduated, they can be friends. For now, it isn't a friendship situation and shouldn't be.

Yeah. My teachers weren't my friends. Now, two decades later or so, I've connected with them on social media--but I still call them "Mr. ..." and "Mrs. or Ms. ..."

I think I stated it in the Chit Chat thread(?) that I've been very fortunate with the teachers I had in elementary, junior/senior high school and college.

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Since children and their parents seem to be the topic so far today, I am so sick of the mini shopping carts at Trader Joe's. They are always being pushed by toddlers who think it's just hysterical to run through the store, racing their siblings, and paying no attention to other shoppers. Their parents are, of course, in another aisle. At least until one of their kids starts screaming because they've collided with my cart. I make sure the kid isn't really hurt, but I'm not offering an apology.  

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At my TJ's, we get parents who have multiple children and each child needs to have their own shopping cart.  Hence, I time my visits to TJ's very carefully to avoid running into that situation.

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1 hour ago, Quof said:

The invitation lists who IS invited, not who isn't.   Writing "no children" is tacky, because, unless their names are on the invitation, they aren't invited in the first place and anyone with simple reading skills should understand that. That's why you never write "and family" - does that include Grandma?  2nd cousin? 

That's why you say not to write "and family" but I think most people who got an invitation "and family" would assume that their children wre invited.  But, not 2nd cousin, because most people would think it would mean family living with you.  I guess you could say "and occupants" to clear up that confusion.   And certainly if they write "and, Greg, Marsha, Peter, and Jan" then they are obviously inviting your older children and leaving out the younger ones.  Who will then have to try to break a world record.  But, if they invite Bobby and Cindy, the rest of the guests can't get mad that there are little kids there.  They've been invited.  Of course, parents should be making sure their children behave.

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The wishes of the host, regardless of event, should be respected. A friend of mine asked if she could bring her toddler to my 40th birthday dinner. I knew why she was asking and it wasn't due to cheapness,  inability to find a sitter, or helicopter mom syndrome. I told her that the rest of my parent friends found sitters for the evening so I didn't feel OK with her bringing him when they were looking forward to an adult night out. She was fine with it and came later.

My peeve is people who bring other people along to parties, or bar hopping events without asking the host (me). It probably wouldn't bother me if those same people included me in events or the people bringing the extras included me in the events the extras were hosting.

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I have a knack.  A knack for being located directly adjacent to loud, squirming children, at nearly every restaurant we patronize.  Part of me realizes that these are uncooked people without social skills.  The other part of me wishes that parents didn't have the ill-conceived notion that their little Johnny or little Suzy is the single most precious child ever produced.  If your child is crawling across a filthy restaurant floor, while crying or worse, then it's time.to.go.  Ask for takeout containers and hit the bricks.  Tip:  Feed your spawn before you leave home so that your kid doesn't convulse from hunger before our very eyes.  

If I'm in a family restaurant, then I really don't have a right to expect only adults near me.  But if I'm in a restuarant that is listed in Yelp or Google with four or five $$$$$, and specializes in high-end cuisine, then I shouldn't have to steel myself for the eventual screaming from hell coming from the high chair (the one they had to dust off and haul up from the basement) at the table next to me.

Kids have to learn how to behave in a social setting, yes, but start them at McDonalds please, and only move on to the next level when they've passed that test.  

As for weddings, I'm not a fan of children in attendance, but I do understand it if they're family members, and the bride and groom haven't expressed a desire for their ceremony to be childless.  My step-daughter is still peeved (won't admit it) that I asked her not to bring her 2-yr old to my wedding.  We have a great relationship and I love my grandchildren (now 28 & 25), but I wouldn't do it differently even now.

Edited by SuprSuprElevated
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6 minutes ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

If I'm in a family restaurant, then I really don't have a right to expect only adults near me.  But if I'm in a restuarant that is listed in Yelp or Google with four or five $$$$$, and specializes in high-end cuisine, then I shouldn't have to steel myself for the eventual screaming from hell coming from the high chair (the one they had to dust off and haul up from the basement) at the table next to me.

Yes, yes, yes, and I want to add any establishment that has "brewery" or "winery" in it's name, these are not kid-friendly places. It's where adults go to enjoy a craft beer or glass of wine, why would you even consider bringing a small child, pre-schooler, or pre-teen to this type of place? It just seems very selfish to me, your needs before your child's needs as well as all the patrons around you who are now subjected to your bored child's misbehavior. 

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I knew a bride once who very clearly stated who was invited to her country club wedding. Children were not included. So of course there’s always this one couple, oh please, who of course brought their two toddlers. Many people approached the bride asking why their children were not invited. Peoples feelings were hurt and they made comments. It really put a damper on what should have been the brides big day. 

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At a semi-recent family wedding I skipped out on but heard about from my parents, my mom's cousin was pissed that the bride and groom had specified "no kids, please" because that meant her son couldn't bring his two kids.  Her son, however, quite reasonably wondered what the hell she was complaining about, because it was a nice, evening wedding, so a) his kids didn't belong there and b) he'd have a much better time if he was able to kick back and socialize without having to make sure his kids weren't bothering anyone, had something to keep them occupied, etc.

Thankfully, very few of my friends opted to procreate, so I rarely have to deal with this, but I've heard several stories of friends being asked, "Can I bring my kid?" (or, worse, sometimes just showing up with said kid) to birthday dinners that are clearly designed for adults only.  Quick tip: If the event starts when your kid should already be in bed, it's not an all-ages event. 

It's all so weird to me -- as was said upthread, invitations are addressed to who is being invited.  So if someone invites you, or you and a guest, to something and says jack all about Junior, or children's activities, or anything about the event indicating it's an all-ages thing, leave the rugrat at home.

Edited by Bastet
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1 hour ago, GoodieGirl said:

I want to add any establishment that has "brewery" or "winery" in it's name, these are not kid-friendly places. It's where adults go to enjoy a craft beer or glass of wine, why would you even consider bringing a small child, pre-schooler, or pre-teen to this type of place? It just seems very selfish to me

It IS extremely selfish of parents to do this! I’ll never forget visiting Biltmore Winery for the first time when I toured the Biltmore Mansion in Asheville, NC—-there were some parents there with older children(they looked between 8-13), standing at one of the booths beside mine doing a wine tasting. Their three kids were just standing there in obvious boredom with nothing to do but stare at their parents sipping away at wine. It was every bit as awkward and weird as it sounds and I felt pretty bad for those kids...my parents would have the odd beer or wine at meals around me, but they sure as Hell never forced me to join them at wineries or breweries. 

Actually, as a frequent brewery visitor I’m always curious about why they’ve grown so “family-friendly” in recent years. There’s ongoing debates on either side and I actually applaud the breweries who have taken a stance on not allowing kids in their places. At least limit the hours of children being there or something.

This article was an interesting take on the overall sentiment: 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.forbes.com/sites/taranurin/2018/03/05/parents-think-twice-before-bringing-your-babies-to-breweries-and-bars/amp/

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I have kids and try not to take them in public period- I kid- but I am fortunate enough to have family around and my spouse so that I don’t have to take them grocery shopping with me every time, etc. 

A while back we were invited to my husbands cousins wedding and only her kids were invited. This would have required airfare and a hotel stay for our then family of 4 to attend. The bride and groom graciously(ha) provided a sitter in a hotel room for any out of town children. I’m sorry but I’m not leaving my kids with someone I don’t know and my kids would have pitched a major fit if I left them with a stranger like that. We did not attend the wedding. In my family it’s a given that children are invited. Especially for out of town family!

Edited by Mountainair
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I've heard some couples wrestling with how to handle that -- people who don't have someone at home to leave the kids with (because if you're gone for a weekend, you want your kid staying with Grandma or something; it's different from just being watched by a sitter for the evening) are going to bring them on the trip, but then the kids are - quite rightly, should that be the hosts' preference - not allowed at the wedding/reception, so providing a sitter at the hotel is really all the hosts can offer to make things easier.  Then people can decide either that works for them, or they'll just stay home.  Any hard feelings either way - "I can't believe I couldn't bring my kids" or "I can't believe they didn't come because of their kids" - are thus unwarranted.

Edited by Bastet
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I was fortunate that while growing up, I had my maternal grandparents who would look after me when my parents went to weddings or receptions. Yup, it wasn't until I was a tween that I was able to attend weddings; I've got pictures of my parents attending receptions at the Indian Embassy/meeting the Ambassador; but guess what? Neither my sister or I are in them. I've got a really good memory and I don't recall ever having to ask why we couldn't go with them. We had our cousins to play with until it was time for bed.

The only time I ever recall ever having a breakdown, not a tantrum, was when I was eight, and my dad had to go to the hospital--something about his back slip disc or something. I was Daddy's Little Girl, and I wasn't allowed to visit him in the hospital. I remember talking to him on the phone, asking when he would come home and then breaking down while asking. He'd been gone two or three days, I think.

I guess the point I'm making is, from my perspective, back when I was growing up, there was no catering to or giving in to the demands of children, and parents being...parents.

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1 hour ago, GHScorpiosRule said:

The only time I ever recall ever having a breakdown, not a tantrum, was when I was eight, and my dad had to go to the hospital--something about his back slip disc or something. I was Daddy's Little Girl, and I wasn't allowed to visit him in the hospital. I remember talking to him on the phone, asking when he would come home and then breaking down while asking. He'd been gone two or three days, I think.

I would hardly classify a child getting upset that their father was in the hospital as a breakdown.  And, I'm sure you did at least have a couple of tantrums when you were 2 or 3 years old.  Babies cry because they are miserable.  Parents then give them food, change their diapers, whatever, as they should.  A baby has no other way to communicate and is completely helpless.  However, they therefore end up learning that crying gets you what you want.  As they learn to talk and communicate in other ways, crying has to be untaught.  And it is not instantaneous.  My pet peeve is whenever someone says that either they as a child, or their own child NEVER had a tantrum.  My favorite is actually people who complain about babies who cry on airplanes and say that theirs would never do that and the parent should spank them.  Literally ridiculous.

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On 4/14/2018 at 12:03 PM, Blergh said:

OK, I don't know how commonplace a pet peeve this is but here goes: I hate it when I do something I know I'd be furious at another person having done to me- as the other day when I cut in front of someone else to get a parking place. Yep, too bad that THAT had to be their first impression of me thanks to my lack of patience.

Yeah, the other day I was super stressed out about a computer issue. I had not had time for lunch, was starving. Husband couldn't care less, I went to put a pizza in the oven, he doesn't feel like pizza. I said I'd get Chinese takeout.  Driving there, pissed and hungry, I turned left without even being aware that the left arrow turned off and I ended up turning in front of a line of cars who had the right of way. I don't do this, this is something that pisses me off when others do it. And I didn't even do it on purpose.

Edited by backformore
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5 hours ago, Katy M said:

I would hardly classify a child getting upset that their father was in the hospital as a breakdown.  And, I'm sure you did at least have a couple of tantrums when you were 2 or 3 years old.

Well, not in the sense that an adult would have a breakdown. But I was inconsolable for the rest of the night. And I was a pretty well adjusted kid. It was hearing my dad's voice, and then I just burst into tears, because he wasn't at home.  To hear my mom and dad, I was a pretty good baby/toddler. It was my younger sister who was famous for her tantrums. My uncle even recorded her having one when we lived in New York. The screeching made my ears bleed. And I know this/can recall this because I have a nearly photographic memory.

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On 4/15/2018 at 10:44 AM, Katy M said:

Do you think there might be a difference whether merging early or zipper early, depending on how much traffic there is?  I'm asking this seriously.  I can understand how zipper merging would be more efficient in heavy traffic.  New York City, LA, Boston, other places.  But, when you live in a rural area, for example, I live in Vermont, and there's not that much traffic and traffic is very light a mile out from the merging area, and only has about 5 or 6 cars slowing up towards the merging point, wouldn't it just be better to get in behind the 5th car instead of driving past those 5 cars. We're not talking major traffic jam here.  Not even close.

If these people are slowing down earlier than is absolutely required, then I would absolutely pass them and I wouldn't feel the least bit bad about it. I've got stuff to do and I don't have all day to do it. If people want to slow down miles beforehand to whatever the construction zone speed limit is, then they should expect to get passed and they shouldn't get upset about it. I already spend way too much time in my car. I've got zero patience for people like that - no matter how much or how little traffic there is.

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22 minutes ago, MrSmith said:

If these people are slowing down earlier than is absolutely required, then I would absolutely pass them and I wouldn't feel the least bit bad about it. I've got stuff to do and I don't have all day to do it. If people want to slow down miles beforehand to whatever the construction zone speed limit is, then they should expect to get passed and they shouldn't get upset about it. I already spend way too much time in my car. I've got zero patience for people like that - no matter how much or how little traffic there is.

Miles beforehand?  a half to quarter of a mile is not miles.  5 cars is not going to take you all day.  And if anyone has any sense they aren't going to let you zipper in after that anyway.

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I cannot deal with the big rigs that leap frog each other on 2 lane highways. They cause the entire line of cars behind them to slow down. Ragey people get ragey and it takes for!ever to get a truck length ahead.

On that note, I also can't stand people who think leaving 1.5 car lenghts between you and the car in front of you is an invitation to squeeze in there. No asshole, I'm going fast and trying to leave some space to stop.

Same with people who tailgate so you go faster, but there is no where to go because of all the cars in front of you.

Edited by theredhead77
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We could use an entire Traffic Pet Peeves thread, lol.  George Carlin said it best in a comedy routine.  I'll paraphrase; "if you're going slower than I am, you're an idiot.  If you're going faster than I am, you're a maniac."

Pretty much how I feel.

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George Carlin has MANY awesome bits about driving. You can find Riding With George on youtube, well worth the 16 minutes.

I have a peeve: I get that sometimes a large or heavy truck can slow down on the highway when it's climbing a steep hill, especially if the traffic is a little thick to start with. What I don't get at all is why when the dump truck in the right lane slows down from 65 to 45-50 at least one person in the left lane ALWAYS slows right down to 45 as well? And then both lines of traffic just stack up for a half mile.

W. T. F. are you doing? 

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1 hour ago, theredhead77 said:

On that note, I also can't stand people who think leaving 1.5 car lenghts between you and the car in front of you is an invitation to squeeze in there. No asshole, I'm going fast and trying to leave some space to stop.

Every morning on my way to work some jackwad assumes the car length is for him/her to slide over at the last minute to make their exit. ugh!

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4 minutes ago, GoodieGirl said:

Every morning on my way to work some jackwad assumes the car length is for him/her to slide over at the last minute to make their exit. ugh!

Same here, and quite often they don't bother to indicate. And when you flash your headlights at them in anger, they give you the finger, or slam on the brakes in the hope you'll crash into them so they'll be able to take out a whiplash claim against you.

I never go anywhere on the road without my front and rear dashcams

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ANOTHER "Fire incident" at Farragut North Metro Station, which is where I get off when taking the train downtown to work. So the train goes to the next station; stops for about 6 minutes; then gets the "word" to move along and proceeds to the next station. Stops. I text my boss to let her know I'm stuck. She texts me back where I am currently--since she's nearby. The train moves so I think we're okay, but no. Stops at the station one station before I need to get off. I just hop off, thinking I can grab a Lyft. When I request one, the FUCKING PRICE is $20.56!!! DA FUCK? And their mission or pitch is that they're CHEAPER than cab fare!

So I start walking the 10 blocks or so to the office, trying half hazardly to flag a cab, with no luck. Assholes keep going past me, and they didn't have any customers. Then I hear a honking, but that's typical; then someone is calling my name---and it's my boss! She was driving past and saw me and thought it was me, and well, we drove into the office together. So, silver lining, I guess?

But Lyft will surely be getting an email from later today, that's fer damned sure.

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2 hours ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

George Carlin said it best in a comedy routine.  I'll paraphrase; "if you're going slower than I am, you're an idiot.  If you're going faster than I am, you're a maniac."

That bit is in this one. I tried to get this to start at the six minute mark, but it doesn't seem to be working. 

I chose the 6:00 mark because I've never stopped finding his observation about the car radio funny, and I think about it every single time it happens to me.

Edited by JTMacc99
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My pet peeve is this never-ending winter. 

About three weeks ago I washed my puffy winter parka and put it away, along with hat, gloves, scarf.  It was a nice, sunny day and I figured, since the calendar said spring had begun, I could be done with winter. 

since then, we've had several days of SNOW.  not a lot, but snow.  Today, it's 31 degrees, with a predicted high temp of 40.  

I like living where there are seasons.  But there are 4 seasons, 12 months, so each season should get exactly 3 moths, not a day more.  

In December, waking up to a bit of snow makes me feel happy.  Snow is pretty, the holidays are coming, there's a peacefulness and calmness in the air when it's snowing.   But in April,  " goddam it, It's fucking snowing!"

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3 hours ago, JTMacc99 said:

 What I don't get at all is why when the dump truck in the right lane slows down from 65 to 45-50 at least one person in the left lane ALWAYS slows right down to 45 as well? And then both lines of traffic just stack up for a half mile.

W. T. F. are you doing? 

They think the trucks are slowing down because a trooper is in the area because they grew up in the 70s and remember the song Convoy and the movie Smokey & the Bandit.

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7 minutes ago, backformore said:

My pet peeve is this never-ending winter. 

 

7 minutes ago, backformore said:

But in April,  " goddam it, It's fucking snowing!"

PREACH!!!!! Stupid Mother Nature is just messing with me now! We had glorious weather in the 70s last Thursday, FRIDAY AND SATURDAY, was in the 80s and now we're back to the 30s and 40s!!!!!

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It's not fucking snowing here, but it is colder than it should be for April. 40 something when it should be 60.  That's pretty bad on it's own, but it's worse when you consider the fact that Friday and Saturday were 80 degrees.  It's a fucking tease.  April weather please.  

My driving related peeve is in stop-and-go traffic.  I let the car in front of me go for a little bit before I start moving, so I can kind of go for a bit without having to brake as frequently and just kinda coast along, and then some asshole cuts in.  Stay in your goddamn lane, you're only making traffic worse.  Plus, if everyone left a little space and stayed the course, there'd be less traffic jams because stop-and go-traffic would be less stop and more go.  But no, everyone has to be up the ass of the car in front of them at all times to get where they're going a millisecond sooner.   

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I will happily trade all of you cold people. It's 88 here at almost 5 p.m. In part of the state it has already hit 100. Wind is in the 15-30 mph range depending on where you are, and gusts are, of course, higher. And there are several large fires in the western part of the state. In one county, more than 200,000 acres have burned, probably quite a bit more because that number was from yesterday or Sunday, and the fires are not contained. I would love to have snow -- or any other form of moisture.

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That horrible weird woman I work with and that I have complained about here before has still been bothering me. We get free breakfast and lunch / snacks and I'm the only vegetarian and somehow all the only vegetarian food ends up with bacon bits or eaten. I said something kinda vaguely in the group how I can't have it and twice she said something about picking it off or eating what was left then went around all day calling me an ingrate and diva and boo hooing butt hurt. 

Finally the cio when we were meeting to go over my production asked me what the hell was going on so I told her. Not just the stuff she's said about/done to me but also things she's said about her and the managing partner that could be verified and then I said it's kinda shitty for her to treat me this way when I keep to myself. Being a hard worker and decent person isn't just surface phony pleasantries it's also behavior. So we'll see what happens next but I'm tired of the drama bullshit and being picked on and fucked with just because I'm an introvert and have a learning disability. 

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It may go against conventional workplace stances, but being relentless harassed is bullshit and costs the company good employees who leave because of.

I hope it makes a positive change for you.

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I think that's the chief reason I left my previous employer - I couldn't stand the office politics, the gossip, the lazy bastards, the numb nuts, the sexist perverts and all the other knob-heads that made life difficult for the more conscientious workers  who just want to get on with the job at hand and go home of an evening  knowing you've had a good day helping people resolve their problems and generally feel you've made a difference. 

There's a wonderful scene from the film, Pulp Fiction, which really fits my mood when dealing with asshats like those at my previous employer.

Quote

I'm gonna call a couple of hard, pipe-hittin' n****s, who'll go to work on the homes here with a pair of pliers and a blow torch.

You hear me talking there, hillbilly boy? I ain't through with you by a damn sight.

I'm gonna get medieval on your ass!

I've got the pliers, but no blow torch, lol

Edited by Zola
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On 4/17/2018 at 8:12 AM, JTMacc99 said:

I have a peeve: I get that sometimes a large or heavy truck can slow down on the highway when it's climbing a steep hill, especially if the traffic is a little thick to start with. What I don't get at all is why when the dump truck in the right lane slows down from 65 to 45-50 at least one person in the left lane ALWAYS slows right down to 45 as well? And then both lines of traffic just stack up for a half mile.

W. T. F. are you doing? 

Is it a car doing the fast-lane slowing down or another heavy vehicle?

If it's a car, it's because people are idiots and get into other vehicles' force fields and have trouble escaping them.  Also known as inattentive driving.

If it's another heavy vehicle, it can be because they thought they would be able to pass the dump truck but it turns out they can't because the hill has slowed them down to the dump truck's speed.  In that case, they should lift and drop behind the dump truck, but that takes admitting that you're not going to outrun the dump truck (which shouldn't be shameful because it's just physics, but some people just can't take it), and you have to hope that impatient people who weren't watching the big picture play out haven't all jumped into any empty space in the right lane thinking they're going to somehow be able to pass over there, which means you CAN'T get over in the right lane.

Oh how I wish everyone had to drive a big heavy vehicle for a day to see what it's like.  There are definitely stupid and assholey truck drivers and stupid and assholey RV drivers, but regular drivers have no idea what the acceleration (or lack of) is like in one, or more worryingly, the stopping distance. 

I have finally, after many years, just stopped moving over for people who are merging onto the freeway when I'm driving the 40-foot motorhome towing a car.  For one, it's not my responsibility because they're doing the merging, but I like to be a nice guy.  And it's usually not possible because there are cars in the other lane, but even when there aren't, I don't do it any more because I can't count the number of times I've done it and then been unable to get back over in the right lane because the merging car didn't speed up fast enough for me to get behind it before everybody started diving over into the right lane to go around that asshole RV that's blocking the left lane, which only further delays the asshole RV getting back into the right lane.  All for being a nice guy and moving over.

 

On 4/16/2018 at 1:45 PM, Katy M said:

Do you think there might be a difference whether merging early or zipper early, depending on how much traffic there is?  I'm asking this seriously.  I can understand how zipper merging would be more efficient in heavy traffic.  New York City, LA, Boston, other places.  But, when you live in a rural area, for example, I live in Vermont, and there's not that much traffic and traffic is very light a mile out from the merging area, and only has about 5 or 6 cars slowing up towards the merging point, wouldn't it just be better to get in behind the 5th car instead of driving past those 5 cars. We're not talking major traffic jam here.  Not even close.

The zipper merge is definitely for places where it gets all backed up and people are stopped at the merge point.  Fill in the lanes and take turns from 0 mph at the merge point.  Zippering early defeats the purpose of zippering.

In your Vermont situation, if traffic is that light it shouldn't be actually stopping at the merge point.  Perhaps slowing down, but in that case "regular" merging can take place before the merge point, which means that the car that wants to get into a particular lane has the duty to figure out a way to do it without impeding the cars already in that lane (and by that I don't mean turning on your blinker and expecting someone to let you in).  If the car can do it so it becomes the first car in line, go right ahead.  It's no different from merging when there isn't a lane reduction coming up.

My geographically specific traffic peeve?  Lane-splitting motorcycles in California.  It's bad enough when you're in stop and go traffic and they scare the shit out of you as they suddenly appear and pass two feet from the side of your car, but the other day dense traffic was moving at 65 mph and some motorcycles were lane splitting so they could go faster.  Because it's safer.  Right.

Edited by StatisticalOutlier
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59 minutes ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

it's because people are idiots

It’s this one. 

It’s this one in general  

I don’t get peeved if a second heavy vehicle moves over because it doesn’t want to lose momentum going up the hill. 

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2 hours ago, stewedsquash said:

I had to search lane splitting and came across this article. Not sure if the law passed (2015 article) but it gives some jumbled back and forth about the reasons for or against. 

http://www.laweekly.com/arts/heres-why-motorcyclists-engage-in-lane-splitting-and-its-not-just-to-get-somewhere-faster-video-5674102

That was interesting.  Again, we don't have that crazy traffic around here.  And, let's keep it that way.  So, I haven't experienced a lot of that firsthand except when on trips, but I had always assumed it was just jerks trying to be stupid.  I had no idea there were legitimate reasons for it.

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3 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

In your Vermont situation, if traffic is that light it shouldn't be actually stopping at the merge point.  Perhaps slowing down, but in that case "regular" merging can take place before the merge point, which means that the car that wants to get into a particular lane has the duty to figure out a way to do it without impeding the cars already in that lane (and by that I don't mean turning on your blinker and expecting someone to let you in).  If the car can do it so it becomes the first car in line, go right ahead.  It's no different from merging when there isn't a lane reduction coming up.

Yes in my original peeve that I posted, last summer I think, the traffic wasn't ever fully stopped.  However it was slowed down to the point that the cars were too close together to merge into within a few car lengths of where the lanes merged.  So, we're probably down to 10 miles an hour and a quarter to a half length of car lengths between the cars and this car wants to get in front of me, and I tried not to let him, but eventually just decided better that than an accident, but it really just pissed me off.    There's no need for that until you get to the point where the traffic is at a complete standstill, IMO, and actually, I did have to stop to let him in whereas I wouldn't have otherwise. It wouldn't have killed him to slow down for 1 or 2 minutes and get in the left lane.  

Edited by Katy M
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5 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

Is it a car doing the fast-lane slowing down or another heavy vehicle?

If it's a car, it's because people are idiots and get into other vehicles' force fields and have trouble escaping them.  Also known as inattentive driving.

 

Argh! Happened today coming home from my Mom's. I was on the cruise control, moving over to the left lane to pass when coming up on a slower vehicle and then getting back over, when this car buzzes up behind me in the left lane, and then... matches my speed, just far enough back to fuck me up when I approach one of those slower vehicles. So I speed up considerably, get far in front of him and pass several slower vehicles. By the time I'm back in the right lane, he's about a mile back. And again, he zooms up in the left lane, but doesn't go on past. There is no traffic in front of him in the left lane. He just settles in off my back bumper, again fucking me up as I approach slower traffic I can see about a mile ahead. I again speed up, get out in front of him well before those slower vehicles, pass them and get back in the right lane. He doesn't keep up with me when I do that, but when I'm out of sight, he's a speed demon until he sees me. Thankfully, the third time, one of those slower vehicles pulled in front of him and kept him from tailing me. My exit came up and I was out of there. Dude, don't block me in by hanging just off my back bumper in the left lane! It was bad enough that he messed up my peaceful cruise control. It almost felt like he was messing with me on purpose instead of just not paying attention.

Edited by riley702
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Biggest merge issue I experience is when approaching a work zone.  Signs indicating a slowdown to 45mph with clear "DO NOT PASS" zones leading up to it.  These asshats will zoom through the DNP zone so as to get ahead of semis through the work zone.  It's insane and maddening.  No zippers, buttons, or snaps involved.

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A recent real estate ad for a tiny studio apartment in NYC claimed it had a "chef's kitchen." STOP SAYING THAT! The stupid thing was 5' x 5'. This is a freaking chef's kitchen and I will not brook any argument:

kitchen.JPG

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Today's lane-splitting incident.

I was on a freeway with four lanes going my direction.  Speed limit 65, light traffic moving effortlessly.  I was going 68 in the second lane in from the left.  I caught up to a big van that I wanted to pass.  I looked and there was a motorcycle way back in the far left lane.  I changed to that lane and as I was getting around the van the motorcycle was right behind me--he'd caught up with a quickness.

So I hit the gas to get around the van ASAP, and also put my right blinker on to indicate to the motorcycle that I knew he was back there and I was going to get over as soon as I could. 

Instead of waiting, he lane-split between me and the big van, me at well over 70 mph, and the van at a little under 65.  After I had put my right blinker on.

And since he was only about 2 feet from the passenger side of my car, it was easy to make out the "POLICE" on his motorcycle.  No lights or siren or any emergency that I could detect--he just continued on his way at about 80 mph.

Safety first, y'all.

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5 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

No lights or siren or any emergency that I could detect--he just continued on his way at about 80 mph.

Safety first, y'all.

Wow.  

Police officers in our area (and I suspect all areas) routinely break traffic laws, when they aren't on emergency calls.  They do it because they can.  I guess it's an unstated perk.

Brings up a police-related issue I have.  Distracted driving?  No one could be more distracted than an officer, perhaps rushing to an incident of some sort, while using the in-car computer, two-way radio, and cell phone.  We see it all the time on COPS-type shows...officers reading details from their computer screen while screaming down the highway en route to a call.  I appreciate what they do for us, really I do, but physician, heal thyself.

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It's not just the roads that are proving difficult & stressful to negotiate.  Pavements and sidewalks are cluttered with people too busy looking at their phones and tablets as they walk aimlessly, not bothering to check who is in front of them, or failing to stop at a street corner to check for traffic before crossing the road. They just expect everyone to sweep aside to let them through undisturbed as they focus on whatever hugely important item they have on their phones!

I sometimes feels the term "smart" phone is more of a misnomer for some owners - The phones might be smart, but the users are dumb/ignorant beyond belief. 

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I woke up early -  or was awaken early by my cat pawing me in the face because he thought it would be a good time to eat.  I grumbled at him, rolled over and went back to sleep.  Somehow I fell into deep enough sleep to have some horribly weird dream(s) that made no sense at all.  Just a series of nuisance and stopped stuff.  It ended with me seeing my Mom and nephew approach with rather somber faces.  When they see my rather harried expression, they look at each other and say "I guess she's already heard".  I go into full panic mode thinking "What happened?"  Before I can say that in my dream, my panicked brain wakes me up.

Cliff hanger dreams suck.

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1 hour ago, DeLurker said:

When they see my rather harried expression, they look at each other and say "I guess she's already heard".  I go into full panic mode thinking "What happened?"  Before I can say that in my dream, my panicked brain wakes me up.

Cliff hanger dreams suck.

Yikes! That's no way to start the day. When I wake up from a shitty dream, or worse, dreaming about actual things that are shitty in my life, I found that if I start envisioning my golf swing in my head, it calms me down to the point where I might actually be able to fall back to sleep. The golf swing has a lot of pieces, it has a lot of history in my head of things that were a little off in the past at one point, and if I make a change to one of those things it might work. I can picture the ball path when I picture my swing. 

It's my version of something that doesn't remind me of anything. 

Oh, and my cat typically sleeps elsewhere in the house, but the last two days she set up shop under my bed. And then at 3:30 she decided that she wanted out and starts clawing at my closed door to get out. Today at 5:30 she decided she wanted back in and started meowing and clawing at the other side of the door. It was only 20 minutes until I was getting up anyway so I let her in. She was all over me, purring, headbutting me until I finally lifted up the covers. She darted under them and purr, purr, purr, nuzzled up against me; basically I was spooning the cat. I told her that I hope to do better someday, but apparently a cat is the best I can do right now. 

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8 hours ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

Wow.  

Police officers in our area (and I suspect all areas) routinely break traffic laws, when they aren't on emergency calls.  They do it because they can.  I guess it's an unstated perk.

Brings up a police-related issue I have.  Distracted driving?  No one could be more distracted than an officer, perhaps rushing to an incident of some sort, while using the in-car computer, two-way radio, and cell phone.  We see it all the time on COPS-type shows...officers reading details from their computer screen while screaming down the highway en route to a call.  I appreciate what they do for us, really I do, but physician, heal thyself.

I dated an ex-cop, and work with 2 ex-cops, all of them drive like maniacs without a police vehicle because "they can". I have all the respect in the world for people like them who defend my life, however, I do not understand the arrogance of eschewing the rules they themselves enforce just because they can. The smug attitude I used to get from my ex when I would tell him to slow down, "These idiots don't know how to drive!" as he passes at 85 mph. Why? None of these men are working in their field any longer, my ex was fired (another story), and the two men that I work with are retired and currently employed as executive drivers for our CEO & COB. There is no need to drive like you're headed to an armed robbery when you're just on your way home from work at 4:30pm....sheesh. 

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