Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

[thehorseofpower]

1 hour ago, GeeGolly said:

My job is figuring folks out. I think there's endless reasons why some don't take covid seriously and less reasons why some do take it seriously. Where do you all think folks fall in the not-taking-it-seriously category. I see the under 25 crowd as having an under developed frontal lobes. Then there's the political non-believers. But what about the rest?

I think there are a sizable number of people who simply cannot see something as "real" unless it has personally affected them, and lack the empathy/imagination to put themselves in another's situation, especially if doing so might lead them to the conclusion that they themselves need to change something about their own behavior. The people who ignore the rules and recommendations and think the whole thing is exaggerated and "just a flu" until they or someone they care about is affected may fall into this. Reminds me of the same type of thinking in which a man might say "I support women's rights because of my wife and daughters."  Um...you shouldn't have to fall in love with a woman or love your girl children to want all humans to have the same rights and opportunities. Just like you shouldn't need to know someone who died of Covid to believe the scientific evidence of its seriousness and care about stopping the spread.

[crazy8s]

I agree - my mom, who wears a mask and has sort of followed the rules in our state still questioned things. Until both her pastors, their wives and children all tested positive. 2 days later her friends that were going to a weekly bowling league all tested positive. 3 of her DAR friends went for coffee and now they are all positive. many of them are very ill. 3 have been hospitalized this week. NOW mom is following all the rules because it is real to her

Edited November 16, 2020 by crazy8s

[thehorseofpower]

57 minutes ago, crazy8s said:

I agree - my mom, who wears a mask and has sort of followed the rules in our state still questioned things. Until both her pastors, their wives and children all tested positive. 2 days later her friends that were going to a weekly bowling league all tested positive. 3 of her DAR friends went for coffee and now they are all positive. many of them are very ill. 3 have been hospitalized this week. NOW mom is following all the rules because it is real to her

I guess the plus to this type of attitude is that their minds can be changed, which is more than I can say for some other types of non-maskers...It's just unfortunate that we have to get to such dire circumstances in order for it to happen. ☹

[Absolom]

This reminds me of the three kinds of people in the world:  those who never learn, those who learn from their own mistakes, and those who learn from the mistakes of others.  

I don't guess we're likely to get through to the never learn type and thankfully some of us don't have to see someone make a mistake to know we need to protect ourselves from this virus.  So we may have four types of people when it comes to a pandemic!

 

Edited November 16, 2020 by Absolom

[DangerousMinds]

6 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

My job is figuring folks out. I think there's endless reasons why some don't take covid seriously and less reasons why some do take it seriously. Where do you all think folks fall in the not-taking-it-seriously category. I see the under 25 crowd as having an under developed frontal lobes. Then there's the political non-believers. But what about the rest?

And what if this was reversed. What if wearing a mask, social distancing and good health hygiene increased your odds of winning a national lottery and increased the odds of your friends and family winning? Would more folks do it?

Yes, because a lot of people are simply selfish, and don’t understand looking at things from the view of being part of a community. But if it meant there was money in it for them personally, they’d be all in.

4 hours ago, doodlebug said:

Hey, Cookies!  When is the surgery on your legs?  What did they do/are they going to do?  Please let us know.

I was going to ask the same. How are your surgeries going, Cookie? Were you able to have/schedule them yet?

[beckie]

Most of the people I know who refuse to wear masks use the excuse that the govt is going to start controlling us, and this is the first step. They follow that up with the excuses some of you posted above. 

[GeeGolly]

Thinking of you @lookeyloo. 

[crazycatlady58]

I think a lot of people feel that you only have a 1% chance of getting the virus and the chance of having complications are small so why bother. I also had a customer tell   that she believed God numbered her days so she wasn't worried.  She also said that tge people who had more of a chance of getting tge virus were African Americans, overweight and ill . She wasn't around those people so she wasn't worried. My first thought was " Well aren't you special. "

2 hours ago, beckie said:

Most of the people I know who refuse to wear masks use the excuse that the govt is going to start controlling us, and this is the first step. They follow that up with the excuses some of you posted above. 

Yes I have had Facebook friends say they would not be controlled. I thought. Good luck with that. 

[Oldernowiser]

33 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

She also said that tge people who had more of a chance of getting tge virus were African Americans, overweight and ill . She wasn't around those people so she wasn't worried. My first thought was " Well aren't you special. "

You’re much nicer than I am. My first thought is “Well isn’t she just a big old selfish bitchy bigot.”

[crazycatlady58]

3 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

You’re much nicer than I am. My first thought is “Well isn’t she just a big old selfish bitchy bigot.”

I honestly don't know if she is racist although her statement definitely sounded that way.  She may have meant her circle of friends just happened to be white and she did not get out much. Who knows, but I have to admit it irritated me. Thats what happens when you work retail you get all sorts. 

[lianau]

Good old Covid .

Nephew in quarantine in August , niece in quarantine in October , niece in quarantine in November . That's the same niece by the way and the nephew is her brother .  They are 5 and 7 years old  and it's the third time now that my brother and sister in law are in this situation .  It's only ever the child in quarantine as a K1 contact person (this time a caretaker in my niece's after school program tested positive )  , never the rest of the family but obviously you can't leave a 5 or 7 year old alone the entire day  so now their employers are also no longer finding this very funny . 

[GeeGolly]

3 hours ago, crazycatlady58 said:

I think a lot of people feel that you only have a 1% chance of getting the virus and the chance of having complications are small so why bother. I also had a customer tell   that she believed God numbered her days so she wasn't worried.  She also said that tge people who had more of a chance of getting tge virus were African Americans, overweight and ill . She wasn't around those people so she wasn't worried. My first thought was " Well aren't you special. "

Yes I have had Facebook friends say they would not be controlled. I thought. Good luck with that. 

Interesting. Where did she come up with only a 1% chance of getting covid? Common sense and basic math make it obvious that the chance of getting covid is much higher than 1%.

[crazycatlady58]

23 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Interesting. Where did she come up with only a 1% chance of getting covid? Common sense and basic math make it obvious that the chance of getting covid is much higher than 1%.

That is a figure that I remember being stated at the start of the pandemic. It is also a % that a Dr. gave me. Has it changed? I don't look at the status of tge pandemic much because it is stressful for me. I only go to work, grocery shopping  and lately to the pet store to find a cat food my cat will eat and I always wear a mask.

[GeeGolly]

4 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

That is a figure that I remember being stated at the start of the pandemic. It is also a % that a Dr. gave me. Has it changed? I don't look at the status of tge pandemic much because it is stressful for me. I only go to work, grocery shopping  and lately to the pet store to find a cat food my cat will eat and I always wear a mask.

Your MD might have misspoken. The R value of covid is above 1, which means its highly contagious. One sick person will infect 3, then those three will infect nine and so on.

Then there's the positivity rate, a positivity rate of 25% means 25 out of 100 folks tested are testing positive. The average positivity rate for the US is hovering around 10% and is much higher in hotspots. 

[DangerousMinds]

Another fun fact : it took this country 98 days to reach our first million cases. We hit another million in just the past 6 days. 

[GeeGolly]

7 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

Another fun fact : it took this country 98 days to reach our first million cases. We hit another million in just the past 6 days. 

Another fun fact: 1 in 3 folks in WI are testing positive right now. This virus is out of control.

[iwantcookies]

I think 1% is a chance of dying from COVID. 
 

 

[Absolom]

In our county the mortality rate is around 1.4% so that sounds about right with a 1% chance of dying.

The chances of catching COVID are extremely variable depending on many factors.

[crazycatlady58]

39 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Your MD might have misspoken. The R value of covid is above 1, which means its highly contagious. One sick person will infect 3, then those three will infect nine and so on.

Then there's the positivity rate, a positivity rate of 25% means 25 out of 100 folks tested are testing positive. The average positivity rate for the US is hovering around 10% and is much higher in hotspots. 

Thank you for the info. 

[Zella]

15 minutes ago, Absolom said:

In our county the mortality rate is around 1.4% so that sounds about right with a 1% chance of dying.

The chances of catching COVID are extremely variable depending on many factors.

That's about what ours is too, give or take a fraction. Some guy in one of the local FB groups keeps calculating the numbers about once a week. 

[Oldernowiser]

For me, what’s possibly even more frightening than the mortality rate is the number of people in all age groups who end up with long-term damage to their bodies—heart, lungs, kidneys. Scares the crap out of me.

[crazy8s]

then the cases of headaches, brain fog and sheer exhaustion all the time.

mr crazy works with a guy who had covid "like mild flu" months ago - he is still unable to work from home or do conference calls. he often can't remember what he wants to say. his speech is very slow. he had to go on short term disability a while back because he admitted he has no focus and can't do his job. it is so frustrating to him. my guess he is late 30's. he has a wife and a bunch of kids.

Edited November 17, 2020 by crazy8s

[GeeGolly]

The 1% mortality rate is based on the likelihood of any American citizen dying of covid, not the percent of infected Americans dying. The risk of dying when infected can run as high as 10%, based on many variables. 

Edited November 17, 2020 by GeeGolly

[Zella]

5 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

The 1% mortality rate is based on the likelihood of any American citizen dying of covid, not the percent of infected Americans dying. The risk of dying when infected can run as high as 10%, based on many variables. 

Yes, that's true. And a 1% mortality rate is nothing to brush off. 1% of the population of my county would be 3,000-ish people. 

[doodlebug]

1 hour ago, Absolom said:

In our county the mortality rate is around 1.4% so that sounds about right with a 1% chance of dying.

The chances of catching COVID are extremely variable depending on many factors.

The other problem with deciding the odds of catching COVID is that a  goodly number of those who have the virus are either asymptomatic or have minimal symptoms and don't get tested.    And, of course, asymptomatic carriers can spread COVID quite easily.  

The current death rate from COVID does hover between 1 and 2%.

When it comes to testing, it is statistically ideal if fewer than 5% of tests are positive; meaning that 95% of those tested for COVID are negative.  This is due to basic epidemiological principles.  When the positivity rates reach 25% as they have in many parts of the US, that is a sign that either we are not doing enough tests or that the virus is running rampant and is potentially going to overwhelm our healthcare system.  As noted above, we are doing far more tests than we were in the spring and availability of testing is fairly good which means that the virus is out of control.

Speaking of an overwhelmed health care system; my employer is planning to redeploy internists in the next few days.  This means they are taking general internal medicine docs as well as some medical subspecialists and pulling them out of their offices and into the hospital because there are so many COVID patients and so many caregivers are out sick.  The original plan including pulling gynecologists to the hospital to help with COVID, but someone apparently came to their senses.  We have been asked to help any patients of ours with minor medical concerns if we're comfortable handling that.  They are also planning to start 'redeploying' residents from all specialties into the COVID units since they're more recently trained and a lot of them are not going to have much to do as we have cancelled all surgeries requiring an overnight hospital stay and are shutting down some of the outpatient surgery centers to get more inpatient staff at the hospitals.

Edited November 17, 2020 by doodlebug

[Absolom]

1 hour ago, GeeGolly said:

The 1% mortality rate is based on the likelihood of any American citizen dying of covid, not the percent of infected Americans dying. The risk of dying when infected can run as high as 10%, based on many variables. 

In our county which is indeed not the whole country, that is not how it has played out.  1.4% of those who have tested positive have died.  The county posts the figures every day.  It's dropped from over 2% to less than 1.5% as more younger people have been infected and doctors have learned how to treat it.  They also list how many people have pre-existing conditions that heighten their risk.  

[SunnyBeBe]

I’m setting up with as many things as I can for sheltering at home. Food, work, even got a sound bar and subwoofer today.  On sale for $139.00 OFF regular price. I hope I like it. I’m keeping the box for the tv just in case. I can use this sound bar with any tv.

[beckie]

Well I got a job! It's part time for now, but it'll work. And it's only two blocks from where I live so I'll be able to walk.

[Oldernowiser]

8 minutes ago, beckie said:

Well I got a job! It's part time for now, but it'll work. And it's only two blocks from where I live so I'll be able to walk.

Oh, Beckie!!! That’s wonderful news. I have been worried about you, but look how resilient and brave you are. I am just flat impressed with you.

Rock on with your badass self!

[crazycatlady58]

24 minutes ago, beckie said:

Well I got a job! It's part time for now, but it'll work. And it's only two blocks from where I live so I'll be able to walk.

Fantastic!!! And who knows maybe part time will move into full time.

[SunnyBeBe]

Beckie, great news about the new job.  Congratulations!  Considering it’s part time, I’d explore any and all resources you may be entitled to. The Markeplace has open enrollment right now too for insurance coverage. For those who qualify, it could be free or low cost per month, if you need it. 

[beckie]

Insurance is one thing I do have already.  I have diabetes,  so its been very great help.

[Marshmallow Mollie]

Folks, I need some support, and I thought you since many of you are familiar with elder care issues.

My mother has been mentally ill for basically all of her life. Her specific issues made her a terrible mother. We have been basically estranged, friendly but nothing resembling close, knowing I would step in in the event of an emergency. I have to add she has not allowed me to take care of her. I moved here a year ago to take care of her, but she refuses.
 

Well, the emergency happened. She collapsed about a month ago. Blood sugar 1400z A1c 14. Pneumonia. UTI. Blood infection. Spent 10 days in the CCU, including some days on a ventilator. I got her moved to the nicest skilled nursing center. Visited daily. Called multiple times a day. Brought my children for window visits, which I have previously kept them away from her because of other issues.
 

Here’s the kicker. She collapsed at someone’s house who, a quick google search revealed, is a child sex predator. I thought she didn’t know. Today she says yes she knew and they are still dating. 
 

I can’t stop crying. The lawyer is already drawing papers for POA and potential guardianship, and I just want to say FUCK HER and FUCK IT ALL. I had just written the lawyer today (trustee) to say I would rather her go to somewhere more expensive and have good care, and now I want to write her back and say I don’t give a fuck where she goes. How do I visit again? How do I call again? How do I bring my kids again? She is abusive to me, so I will not confront her.

Husband is being typical bonehead with, “oh you’re still upset about that?” reaction. 
 

She has done so much shit to me, but now she is dating a sex offender and I have six year old twins?!?! 
 

Fortunately I already have a therapy appt next week, short term anxiety meds to get me through her hospitalization, and an appt in Dec for long term meds, but now I have to figure out make it till then (make it in the  practical sense, not suicidal sense).

[crazycatlady58]

@marshmallow mollie, first of all a big gentle hug for you. Can you oversee her care without having any contact with her? Make sure she is a safe place,  it does not have to be the most expensive one there is, just a safe place  then call and check on her once a week with the person in charge of her care. You need to do what you feel is safe for your children only you know what that is. The only way that you might be able to see her is not think of her as your mother, just this sick mentally ill woman who I need to look in on and make sure she is not being neglected. 

[Oldernowiser]

Marshmallow, at some point you’ve done what you can do. Your children come first. The end. One upside to Covid is that it’s pretty easy to justify no contact with someone. Your kids don’t go anywhere near that guy.

Unless your mother is at a point where you feel you need to go to court and have her declared mentally incompetent, she still makes her own decisions...which you are not responsible for fixing. 

You have done much more than many others would have done, given the history. She has instead chosen this. Try to be at peace with the fact that you generously gave her a healthy alternative for her life...that she took this path instead is on her.

Big hug.

[iwantcookies]

if she is in a nursing home your kids will unlikely meet her boyfriend.  Sadly you cannot change people.  Maybe you and the kids can talk to her on video only. I like the suggestion of making sure she is okay but being out of her life. Maybe treat her as an auntie or something. 
 

You have to do what’s right for you. Whatever that is. Your life your choice. 
 

Big hug !!!
 

@Marshmallow Mollie
 

 

[GeeGolly]

@Marshmallow Mollie, what a generous and gracious daughter you are. I don't know where you are emotionally with your relationship with your mother, but if you're able, you should walk away. You're mom is a grown woman who seems to think of only herself. I'm guessing no matter what you do for her, or don't do for her, will always lead to disappointment and possibly dangerous situations. IMO, without knowing you, I think its time to work on divorcing your mom and start mourning that loss.

[SunnyBeBe]

Marshmallow Mollie, I’ll just share what I have read about and seen over the last 6 years of being a caregiver for my cousin who has dementia.  There are online support boards that are helpful. I’ve learned so much from them.  You have been hurt. It’s important to protect yourself. Caring for someone who is unstable or resistant to care can be very stressful and overwhelming. I would consult with an attorney in her jurisdiction to find out the details of what is required of you if you become a Guardian. It’s a huge responsibility. If your mother is not competent, then the court can appoint a professional as her Guardian.  Then, you can have limited involvement.  And, if she is competent, a Durable POA might be a good idea, but it’s a struggle if the person resists, argues or uses poor judgment despite your input.  I’d discuss the situation with an Elder Law attorney, so they can provide practical advice on situations like yours. Also, trying to help someone control their blood sugar, when they are not interested is extremely difficult.  If she’s deemed incompetent, you might consider hiring a case care manager, if funds allow. 
 

[Jenniferbug]

MarshmallowMollie, I have nothing valuable to add to the good advice above but just wanted to say that my heart goes out to you for having to deal with this. You and your kids come first. Do what you need to stay sane, and if that's washing your hands of her entirely, please do it. 

[iwantcookies]

@beckie congratulations on getting a job!!!

 

@lookeyloo I keep you in my thoughts. Big hug.

[iwantcookies]

Off Facebook from an acquaintance who is such a liar it’s totally not true 🙄🙄🙄

If it wasn’t for parents supporting them , they be living under a bridge 

Such an ugrateful person 

Edited November 18, 2020 by iwantcookies

[iwantcookies]

I need to unburden myself lol. More from the same person. Seriously! I was asked on messenger repeatedly for $200 for a phone. I declined to give $$$. Now I’m ignored if I say hi. There is one more image coming. Any good ones to share from you all??? Who is hitting you up for $$$?

And this person NEVER gives gifts at all. In 4 years I got 1 Christmas card. 

[iwantcookies]

Last one! I think it’s Jill Rods relative. I swear always asking for $$$ and refusing to work.

Edited November 18, 2020 by iwantcookies

[Happyfatchick]

Blurg.  I forget who dropped that word the first time, but I love it and still use it whenever possible.  Covid on the rise is a big fat blurg.  Y’all know that in 50 years, kids studying American history are going to be reading about this the same way we read about the dustbowl and the depression and the great wars.  Memorizing numbers - talking about an America they don’t even recognize.  You know how drepression era movies always have a sort of sepia tint?  (Think about Oh Brother Where Art Thou or Paper Moon).  I wonder what color we’ll be?  Blue I think.  

I’m working like CRRRRRAZY right now.  The motion picture industry opened up, and was behind in production.  I thought - well, it will take us four years to get back to current pics.  Oh nay nay:  apparently we neeeeeeed the distraction.  I think they are trying to kill me, seriously.  But the unions make sure my delivery/pick up people are masked and they aren’t making me leave the house.  So I’m doing double or triple my normal work load, banking all the money because this will stop.  It will come to a screeching, grinding halt.  Did I say before that we’re closing the bus shop at the end of December?  We thiught maaaaaybe we could hold out and make it work, but it doesn’t look at way.  We are on the fringe of the Atlanta airport.  Our customers have been airport park/ride, hotel shuttles for the most part.  Smaller number of retirement (or nursing) homes and churches.  All our customers have that smacked in the face/dreading the other shoe falling look.  None of our customers are frivolous, buses are a need - when people are moving.  But.  People aren’t moving.  So yes, I’m watching the bus coming at ME, knowing embroidery may be our only income - and that it could stop at any moment.  But hey.  Got my big girl parties on, and a game plan. 

I do come with good news (and a shout out to @iwantcookies for coming up with good news Sunday).  This is something that should be a tradition.  Always post something good on Sunday.  I didn’t post good news on Sunday, so here you go.  I’m posting a pic of my Mama’s quilt that was always MY personal fave.  It was white and pink blocks originally.  The pink part is sort of rosey.  I adore this quilt.  It’s flannel, and when I wash it and bury my face in it, I still smell my mother.  It was falling apart.  Some of the squares were worn through, all of the stitching was giving up the ghost.  I’ve been sitting here for 2 months whenever I watch TV (I have a COMPLETE inability to watch TV without something I’m my hands to work on).  I’ve patched and replaced, sewn up holes, and restitched the whole dang thing.   Once, in a rare moment of lucidity, Mama asked me what I would like to have of hers when she was gone.  I said “I want that quilt box that Daddy made”.  She was surprised, as she had plenty of jewelry and collection pieces.  She says “anything else?”.  I said “yes.  I want all the quilts too”.  I don’t have them all, I was a good sister and divided them up - but I hid the pink flannel.  I can say that because no one in my family posts here.  Ha!!

also, I need to say I know u should have moved some clutter out of the way of the pics.  Who’s worrying about clutter??  Marvel wants their seats NOW!!

[Happyfatchick]

@iwantcookies, those are HILARIOUS!!!  Maybe (maybe???) they’re posting them for fun.  Is the person who’s looking for $ to buy pants currently WEARING pants??  That’s what I wanna know!!!

[iwantcookies]

Those quilts are so lovely! My mom bought a sewing machine and promised to teach me. Used it a few times. It’s in a box collecting dust. 

It’s so nice that you have something your mom made!!! How special!!!

@Happyfatchick

Edited November 18, 2020 by iwantcookies

[NotthebadVictoria]

3 hours ago, Marshmallow Mollie said:

Folks, I need some support, and I thought you since many of you are familiar with elder care issues.

My mother has been mentally ill for basically all of her life. Her specific issues made her a terrible mother. We have been basically estranged, friendly but nothing resembling close, knowing I would step in in the event of an emergency. I have to add she has not allowed me to take care of her. I moved here a year ago to take care of her, but she refuses.
 

Well, the emergency happened. She collapsed about a month ago. Blood sugar 1400z A1c 14. Pneumonia. UTI. Blood infection. Spent 10 days in the CCU, including some days on a ventilator. I got her moved to the nicest skilled nursing center. Visited daily. Called multiple times a day. Brought my children for window visits, which I have previously kept them away from her because of other issues.
 

Here’s the kicker. She collapsed at someone’s house who, a quick google search revealed, is a child sex predator. I thought she didn’t know. Today she says yes she knew and they are still dating. 
 

I can’t stop crying. The lawyer is already drawing papers for POA and potential guardianship, and I just want to say FUCK HER and FUCK IT ALL. I had just written the lawyer today (trustee) to say I would rather her go to somewhere more expensive and have good care, and now I want to write her back and say I don’t give a fuck where she goes. How do I visit again? How do I call again? How do I bring my kids again? She is abusive to me, so I will not confront her.

Husband is being typical bonehead with, “oh you’re still upset about that?” reaction. 
 

She has done so much shit to me, but now she is dating a sex offender and I have six year old twins?!?! 
 

Fortunately I already have a therapy appt next week, short term anxiety meds to get me through her hospitalization, and an appt in Dec for long term meds, but now I have to figure out make it till then (make it in the  practical sense, not suicidal sense).

You can look up exactly what he’s on the registry for, for some it’s consensual sex with a 17y/o depending on states, laws and rulings. Either way if it makes you uncomfortable you do not have to take them where he is, and there should never be a reason to leave your children unsupervised with him (or any adult male that is not the parent  for that matter, that’s just how I was raised). 

[iwantcookies]

@Happyfatchick

 

that person has wealthy parents and wants for nothing. Just got an expensive puppy as a present! What awful parents they have... NOT.  In old house had 2 bedrooms to use for their stuff and it was full of good stuff too!!! This person is just a liar and a grifter. 
 

Parents enabled and spoiled this person and at 29 years old too late to try to make them get a job and be independent 

[emmawoodhouse]

11 minutes ago, iwantcookies said:

@Happyfatchick

 

that person has wealthy parents and wants for nothing. Just got an expensive puppy as a present! What awful parents they have... NOT.  In old house had 2 bedrooms to use for their stuff and it was full of good stuff too!!! This person is just a liar and a grifter. 
 

Parents enabled and spoiled this person and at 29 years old too late to try to make them get a job and be independent 

It's never too late. The parents have to cut the cord. 

[Scarlett45]

Guys- HBOMax is finally available on fire stick!! No more having to watch movies on my iPad!!!

 

So frivolous but so nice right now.