Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

[SunnyBeBe]

Many prayers and positive thoughts for the boys and the rescue team. I can't imagine how the nerves must be by now.  

I have an odd thing that happened and I wonder if anyone has any tips for how I might get more information or if you've ever had anything like this happen to you before.    It's all so confusing. Please forgive the length of this. It's just such an odd thing.   I just found out, actually, by accident, that someone that I was once very close to has died. The glitch is that they died a long time ago.  We were from the same home town, but, we lost touch and didn't run in the same circles anymore.  The last contact was through his sister who told me he was living abroad. I thought he was fine and happy and have thought of him that way, in his tropical paradise all this time. He wasn't married and had no children. 

So, any suggestions on how I can find out what happened? He was quite young and didn't have any health problems that I was aware of. (Except for a car accident that required some surgery, but, he recovered well.)  I'm not sure why I want to know.   I went to the website of his high school to see if there were any memorials and was shocked that they said they didn't post the cause of death, due to the large number of suicides and drug overdoses! I'm not kidding!  I can't find any of his old friends. I think they have died too. And, besides, I'd feel weird contacting family members or friends after all this time.   I actually wish that I hadn't found out the news. Oh, I looked at the American Embassy website and they only release info to next of kin.  So, no help from that dept. 

Edited July 9, 2018 by SunnyBeBe

[Ohiopirate02]

10 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Many prayers and positive thoughts for the boys and the rescue team. I can't imagine how the nerves must be by now.  

I have an odd thing that happened and I wonder if anyone has any tips for how I might get more information or if you've ever had anything like this happen to you before.    It's all so confusing. Please forgive the length of this. It's just such an odd thing.   I just found out, actually, by accident, that someone that I was once very close to has died. The glitch is that they died a long time ago.  We were from the same home town, but, we lost touch and didn't run in the same circles anymore.  The last contact was through his sister who told me he was living abroad. I thought he was fine and happy and have thought of him that way, in his tropical paradise all this time. He wasn't married and had no children. 

So, any suggestions on how I can find out what happened? He was quite young and didn't have any health problems that I was aware of. (Except for a car accident that required some surgery, but, he recovered well.)  I'm not sure why I want to know.   I went to the website of his high school to see if there were any memorials and was shocked that they said they didn't post the cause of death, due to the large number of suicides and drug overdoses! I'm not kidding!  I can't find any of his old friends. I think they have died too. And, besides, I'd feel weird contacting family members or friends after all this time.   I actually wish that I hadn't found out the news. Oh, I looked at the American Embassy website and they only release info to next of kin.  So, no help from that dept. 

Have you checked the local newspaper for an obituary?  You can try to contact the local public library and see if they can find it.  Just make sure that you have the exact date of death, since a lot of times the librarians are using a microfilm reader.  The library also might have online access to it. 

[SunnyBeBe]

1 minute ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

Have you checked the local newspaper for an obituary?  You can try to contact the local public library and see if they can find it.  Just make sure that you have the exact date of death, since a lot of times the librarians are using a microfilm reader.  The library also might have online access to it. 

Yes, I found the local obit and announcement of the memorial service online.  I'm a little hurt that no one notified me at the time, but, I suppose that's being unfair. We had gone on with our own lives.  Still, they knew what we had at one time and I would think they would have let me know. I was easy to reach as they knew my business and location.  But, anyway, I'm being too sensitive, I suppose. But, the obit only says that he died at his home. Nothing more. I would expect something like ....after a long illness or suddenly died, so.....I just don't know.  Both of his parents died rather early from alcohol related conditions. So, .........to my knowledge he was not an alcoholic, but, it's in the back of my mind. 

[Mrs. P.]

If you know how to contact a family member, then I think you should. They may be pleased to learn that an old friend is interested in learning more about him and cares enough to investigate.

[SunnyBeBe]

11 minutes ago, Mrs. P. said:

If you know how to contact a family member, then I think you should. They may be pleased to learn that an old friend is interested in learning more about him and cares enough to investigate.

Really? It's been a long time.  I'm just not sure.  For one, the sister may feel bad that she didn't bother to notify me. I don't want to being her any more grief.   I guess she figured that I'd hear about itone way or the other. Plus, I have tried to find her, but, I think that she must have remarried again.  She's been married quite a few times.  And, if if it was a tragic type death.....it might open old wounds. IDK.  IT's a lot to consider. 

Another strange thing about this, is that I had a strong synchronicity dream about this person years ago, back when we still were seeing each other.  But, I never picked up on the death....HOWEVER, the reason I happened to find out about him now, is that I had a dream about another male friend who died a few years ago.  They actually knew each other.  In my dream on Friday night, I saw the other friend and he was well.  For some reason, that dream caused me to think of my old ex.  I looked him up online and found out about the death. Isn't that odd?  I' think I'll post about it on the Dreams thread.  

Edited July 9, 2018 by SunnyBeBe

[GeeGolly]

Did the obit have a donation suggestion? A lot of times that gives a possible hint. I would reach out to an old mutual friend (maybe an FB friend?) and just be honest - you were shocked and saddened and curious to why he died young. Legit feelings.

But I wouldn't feel embarrassed at all.

[lookeyloo]

I wouldn't feel embarrassed or worry about opening an old wound. My brother committed suicide and not a day goes by that I don't think of him and this was in 2002.  The wound is always open although now it is in the background.  I'm just saying that if anyone from his past called me I would love to talk to them about him.  Mr lookeyloo and I talk about him almost every day, really.  You know the sister better than I do, so if you think she wouldn't appreciate a call, then take your lead from that.  

[Mindthinkr]

I am sorry @SunnyBeBe that this is weighing so heavily upon your heart. It sounds as though you need some closure.  I hope you find it and peace in your heart. 

[Happyfatchick]

Along those same lines @SunnyBeBe, about a million years ago, I had a really great (male) friend that I’d known all my life.  Same age.  Hung with the same group as me from birth through college.   He married a girl we met later, and they were only married about 5 minutes.  BAM, she was gone.  Out like a scalded dog.  Her FIL called me the morning she vacated to ask if I had any idea what went down.  (I didn’t).  She now lives in another state.  She posted recently on FB that (her words) she never talked about her brief first marriage, but that she now felt she could, as he had passed.  She went on to talk about what an abusive psycho he was, and how she would never mourn his passing and was glad he’s gone.  However, although I knew the first husband, she didn’t call his name in the post

I know his family.  We don’t have any regular contact any more, but if they walked in right now, I’d be thrilled to see them.  When we do cross paths (funerals and such), we jump up and down and do the squeally thing.  His parents are elderly now and don’t do FB.  I’ve stalked everybody I know looking for some record and can’t find anything.  I’ve looked for obits.  I went to his sister and brothers, even SIL’s accounts and don’t see anything.  I want to ask the ex-wife SO BAD, but it seems like such a bad plan.  I guess eventually I’m going to ask the ex to clarify but I sure don’t want to.   SURELY I’d have heard if he really died.  So weird!!

All that to say I feel ya.

[latetotheparty]

6 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Many prayers and positive thoughts for the boys and the rescue team. I can't imagine how the nerves must be by now.  

I have an odd thing that happened and I wonder if anyone has any tips for how I might get more information or if you've ever had anything like this happen to you before.    It's all so confusing. Please forgive the length of this. It's just such an odd thing.   I just found out, actually, by accident, that someone that I was once very close to has died. The glitch is that they died a long time ago.  We were from the same home town, but, we lost touch and didn't run in the same circles anymore.  The last contact was through his sister who told me he was living abroad. I thought he was fine and happy and have thought of him that way, in his tropical paradise all this time. He wasn't married and had no children. 

So, any suggestions on how I can find out what happened? He was quite young and didn't have any health problems that I was aware of. (Except for a car accident that required some surgery, but, he recovered well.)  I'm not sure why I want to know.   I went to the website of his high school to see if there were any memorials and was shocked that they said they didn't post the cause of death, due to the large number of suicides and drug overdoses! I'm not kidding!  I can't find any of his old friends. I think they have died too. And, besides, I'd feel weird contacting family members or friends after all this time.   I actually wish that I hadn't found out the news. Oh, I looked at the American Embassy website and they only release info to next of kin.  So, no help from that dept. 

 

Sunny, I had something similar happen several years ago. I found out through my sister that my junior high omg crush crush crush had passed away at the age of 46; at this point it’s been about 20 years since since he’s been gone. So I looked up his actual obituary and it was sparse, like 3 or 4 sentences, and I knew something was really wrong. D was always very vibrant, full of life, pretty much a friend to everyone, super nice and kind. I couldn’t imagine his life reduced to four sentences. 

I considered calling his mom - I rode my bike in front of his house so often in junior high that she’d invite up on the porch for lemonade if she was puttering in the garden - but I was very hesitant. I thought about what could have taken him at that age: accident, maybe an aggressive cancer but I something was telling me it was AIDS. He always seemed to have casual girlfriends but I learned about beards in a college soc class and it hit me how much it sounded like D. 

I didn’t call his mom; I was afraid of maybe opening a wound. But periodically I’d google his name thinking maybe some info would pop up on Ancestry or somewhere. And sure enough, something popped up about three years years ago: his square on the AIDS quilt. I don’t know why I was so sure. Just one of those freaky intuitions maybe. 

So I don’t have any advice for you. But I wish you well your journey to closure.  

Edited July 10, 2018 by latetotheparty
Whoops, missed a word

[kokapetl]

On 09/07/2018 at 5:19 AM, Happyfatchick said:

I read that they brought the weakest 4 first, good decision.  You know their families were euphoric!  Also someone mentioned at dinner last night they’ve considered medicating the children.  Risky, but hmmmm.  I expect when it’s all said and done, we’ll hear all the stories.  I’m really glad they removed media and non-essential resources to get this done.  Thailand must have big kahoonas to remove media.  In the US, they’d be staging a protest and screaming America has a right to KNOW!  And you know, sometimes, that’s just secondary.  Guh, I hope and pray the outcome for all is just as good as the first.  Good job, rescue team!!!

Thailand isn’t exactly a free country, but outside of America, there is basically zero tolerance for Nancy Grace style shenanigans. 

[kokapetl]

11 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Many prayers and positive thoughts for the boys and the rescue team. I can't imagine how the nerves must be by now.  

I have an odd thing that happened and I wonder if anyone has any tips for how I might get more information or if you've ever had anything like this happen to you before.    It's all so confusing. Please forgive the length of this. It's just such an odd thing.   I just found out, actually, by accident, that someone that I was once very close to has died. The glitch is that they died a long time ago.  We were from the same home town, but, we lost touch and didn't run in the same circles anymore.  The last contact was through his sister who told me he was living abroad. I thought he was fine and happy and have thought of him that way, in his tropical paradise all this time. He wasn't married and had no children. 

So, any suggestions on how I can find out what happened? He was quite young and didn't have any health problems that I was aware of. (Except for a car accident that required some surgery, but, he recovered well.)  I'm not sure why I want to know.   I went to the website of his high school to see if there were any memorials and was shocked that they said they didn't post the cause of death, due to the large number of suicides and drug overdoses! I'm not kidding!  I can't find any of his old friends. I think they have died too. And, besides, I'd feel weird contacting family members or friends after all this time.   I actually wish that I hadn't found out the news. Oh, I looked at the American Embassy website and they only release info to next of kin.  So, no help from that dept. 

Are death certificates public records where he died? 

[Mindthinkr]

The power of pray works. They are all out of the cave. Still there is a lot of healing and illness to deal with. I feel badly for them that they still haven’t been allowed contact with their families. 

So Hallelujah that all have been rescued and a guarded still praying for their continuing recovery. 

[SunnyBeBe]

Thank God that the boys and coach are rescued!  I am so relieved.  Now, I hope the mental healing can start. 

And thank you all for your kind words of support and advice about my former boyfriend that I recently discovered was dead. I'm trying to take it all in.  Your stories really do help me and have given me a lot to consider.  I have decided to try to speak with someone. Maybe, his sister or his niece. She's an adult now, but, she may be easier to find than the sister. 

That's a good idea about the death certificate in the country where he died, but, there may be a language barrier, since it would be in a different language.  I wouldn't be able to read the one on file. And, if they sent one to the US for filing here, it would be with our state's Vital Records and those are restricted to next of kin or legal representative of the decedent. 

I did get the idea of checking the local newspaper in the country where he was living,  to see if there was any notice there.  I found a couple that are in English. I was surprised, but, I doubt they would have much in the way of details. He was a business owner, so, maybe, they would have had some comments from colleagues or the public.  

Ref. the obit in his hometown.  It said that in lie of flowers, to make a monetary donation to the charity of your choice. So, no hint there.  His best friend was listed in the obit, but, I think I found his obit too. It appears that he died in 2016.  

I have decided to pursue this, so, I can know what really happened. It helps to know that others have encountered this type of thing too.  From once, I think I do understand what it means to need closure.  

[Ohiopirate02]

8 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Thank God that the boys and coach are rescued!  I am so relieved.  Now, I hope the mental healing can start. 

And thank you all for your kind words of support and advice about my former boyfriend that I recently discovered was dead. I'm trying to take it all in.  Your stories really do help me and have given me a lot to consider.  I have decided to try to speak with someone. Maybe, his sister or his niece. She's an adult now, but, she may be easier to find than the sister. 

That's a good idea about the death certificate in the country where he died, but, there may be a language barrier, since it would be in a different language.  I wouldn't be able to read the one on file. And, if they sent one to the US for filing here, it would be with our state's Vital Records and those are restricted to next of kin or legal representative of the decedent. 

I did get the idea of checking the local newspaper in the country where he was living,  to see if there was any notice there.  I found a couple that are in English. I was surprised, but, I doubt they would have much in the way of details. He was a business owner, so, maybe, they would have had some comments from colleagues or the public.  

Ref. the obit in his hometown.  It said that in lie of flowers, to make a monetary donation to the charity of your choice. So, no hint there.  His best friend was listed in the obit, but, I think I found his obit too. It appears that he died in 2016.  

I have decided to pursue this, so, I can know what really happened. It helps to know that others have encountered this type of thing too.  From once, I think I do understand what it means to need closure.  

Depending on how your friend died and where, there is a possibility of newspaper articles popping up.  I know of a young man who lost his battle with addiction in a local jail.  His obit naturally did not include this information, but if you read another page of the paper there was a story.  Then almost 2 years later, another newspaper was doing a series on deaths in the county jails.  His mother and grandmother were interviewed and were on the front page of the Sunday edition.  Of course this article was terribly slanted in favor of the mother and grandmother and a lot of information was left out.  You never know what you can find out if you begin to look.  Now if he passed away from an illness like a heart attack or cancer, you will probably not find out anything else. 

[SunnyBeBe]

I'll have to find out if these English newspapers were in publication back then. But, it might be easier to check with family members first. Does anyone know if your cell phone bills you extra for international calls?

[louannems]

1 hour ago, Mindthinkr said:

The power of pray works. They are all out of the cave. Still there is a lot of healing and illness to deal with. I feel badly for them that they still haven’t been allowed contact with their families. 

So Hallelujah that all have been rescued and a guarded still praying for their continuing recovery. 

I was so anxious about the latest rescue mission that I slept very poorly.  I even dreamed I was inside the cave!  And I kept dreaming that the cave walls were shifting, closing in even tighter in the already tight spots.  Every time I woke, I refused to open the CNN app, til morning.

I was beyond happy to read all are out and safe!  But now I'm worrying about the 3 Seals and Dr getting out.

I'm very claustrophobic and this whole cave ordeal has been riveting, but very difficult for me.

[SunnyBeBe]

I'm not sure how someone who was claustrophobia would have fared in that cave. Louannems.  Man.....I'm not, but, it would have been a struggle for me, that's for sure.  My fear would be it filling with water and drowning.  

I went to visit Luray Caverns as a child and I recall then being in awe of the place and wondering if it was safe! 

Edited July 10, 2018 by SunnyBeBe

[lookeyloo]

I am not adventurous and so wouldn't ever go in a cave.  Maybe the Luray Caverns.  Not sure.  At my age I'm always looking for an escape route!  At meetings, movies, etc. I like to sit in the last row, in a seat by the door.  Just in case.

[doodlebug]

On ‎7‎/‎9‎/‎2018 at 4:51 PM, SunnyBeBe said:

Really? It's been a long time.  I'm just not sure.  For one, the sister may feel bad that she didn't bother to notify me. I don't want to being her any more grief.   I guess she figured that I'd hear about itone way or the other. Plus, I have tried to find her, but, I think that she must have remarried again.  She's been married quite a few times.  And, if if it was a tragic type death.....it might open old wounds. IDK.  IT's a lot to consider. 

Another strange thing about this, is that I had a strong synchronicity dream about this person years ago, back when we still were seeing each other.  But, I never picked up on the death....HOWEVER, the reason I happened to find out about him now, is that I had a dream about another male friend who died a few years ago.  They actually knew each other.  In my dream on Friday night, I saw the other friend and he was well.  For some reason, that dream caused me to think of my old ex.  I looked him up online and found out about the death. Isn't that odd?  I' think I'll post about it on the Dreams thread.  

 

I would suggest reaching out to a family member, telling them that somehow you missed the news and have just found out.  Offer condolences, tell them how much you loved him, share a little bit about why he was so special to you.  Tell them you were so surprised to hear he had died since he'd always been so healthy and about your little fantasy of his life in paradise.  Tell them that you know it's late, but, if there's a charity or anything you could do, you'd like to try.  Ask if perhaps you could get together by phone or in person to talk about him. I am sure his family is still grieving him and always will; reaching out to let them know how important he was to you and why you loved him will always be welcome no matter how long its been.  I don't think you can politely ask about his death, but, if you open a dialog with them about your relationship, the information may come naturally as part of the conversation.

ETA: My dad has been gone almost 15 years, I miss him every day.  I recently ran into someone who used to work with him who I hadn't seen in years.  We spent several minutes reminiscing and he told me a couple of funny stories I hadn't heard (my dad was hilarious) and it warmed my heart and made my day.  Never think that it has been too long to reach out and share a memory.

Edited July 11, 2018 by doodlebug

[SunnyBeBe]

Thanks Doodlbug!  What a wonderful post.  I get what your are saying and think it is a good idea. I'm so sorry about the loss of your father. He sounds like a wonderful man. 

I had a dream about my ex-boyfriend who passed away last night.  It was very nice and comforting.  I'll post more about it on the dreams thread. Maybe, it was a sign. 

Edited July 11, 2018 by SunnyBeBe

[Jynnan tonnix]

Had to share. It's been years since I last drew  portrait, but all the photos I've been getting of my granddaughter inspired me! I'm a bit out of practice, but pretty happy with the way it is coming out...just have to decide how much peripheral detail I need. 

Edited July 11, 2018 by Jynnan tonnix

[crazycatlady58]

34 minutes ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Had to share. It's been years since I last drew  portrait, but all the photos I've been getting of my granddaughter inspired me! I'm a bit out of practice, but pretty happy with the way it is coming out...just have to decide how much peripheral detail I need. 

What a cutie.

[latetotheparty]

1 hour ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Had to share. It's been years since I last drew  portrait, but all the photos I've been getting of my granddaughter inspired me! I'm a bit out of practice, but pretty happy with the way it is coming out...just have to decide how much peripheral detail I need. 

Oh wow, she’s beautiful. Thinking back to the infant pictures you shared - she was so bright-eyed and aware - and look at her now. Even more so. 

[SunnyBeBe]

Just lovely.  I'm impressed.  I wish I could do something like that.  You should do this more often.  

[latetotheparty]

@doodlebug thank you so much for your lovely post. For various reasons mourning my dad is not a straightforward thing. But I recently spoke to one of his best friends from college (who actually was his sister’s second husband after she was widowed - families are so weird) and he told me a lot of stories about dad that I never knew. And the experience of getting to talk about him and not have it be a fraught situation was so healing for me.  You’re so great. 

[SunnyBeBe]

My parents were recently talking about some things that happened with my maternal and paternal grandfathers many years ago. (It was about each of their religious conversions.) They both passed away long ago. They were actually telling these stories to my dad's sisters and BIL, but, it shocked me because, I had never heard these stories!  I thought that I knew quite a bit about both men, but, apparently, there is still a lot to be learned. 

[zoomama]

20 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Had to share. It's been years since I last drew  portrait, but all the photos I've been getting of my granddaughter inspired me! I'm a bit out of practice, but pretty happy with the way it is coming out...just have to decide how much peripheral detail I need. 

jynnan --  you have quite a talent. that is a beauteous sketch(?) ---- you owe it to your wee one and yourself to keep practicing and do something with your talent that makes you happy. 

[Rabbittron]

Boy am I in trouble now I just got a text from Amazon the store having a truck sale for the mini hot pot 9 in 1 Boytron that's the only one he does not have then after I get that text he texts me from camp saying please please please please he said you can also say maybe for Christmas if you can't afford it and I understand guess I will be leaving work early today to pick one up for him.

[zoomama]

i just realized that i did not tell you all more about our road trip. so we left on a wednesday morning after multiple false starts  and errands.  we arrived phoenix in time for an early dinner with my aunt and uncle. from there the next day we headed east on the 40 (also known as Route 66).  i drove a lot of hours and we ended up stopping in tucumcari NM.  my third day was hellaciously long!  drove to the fort worth area and found via my DIL that i needed to take a detour to their city that added a couple extra hours onto an already long,  boring drive! we arrived in time for dinner that night.  we played for a couple days as one of my other son's had also driven out there and the 4 boy cousins were having so much fun together. 

on the following tuesday began another very long bout of driving with 3 boys in the back seat, north this time to branson missouri. it was a lovely drive until the last couple hours when a HUGE storm hit. we were, by then, on a 2-lane road winding through the ozark mountains trying desperately to get to our hotel in branson. we made it and had dinner at that fabulous 5 star venue...chik fil a.  we were pooped. oh and while it stormed, the temps were nearing 100 degrees. 

we spent the next day at silver doller city...in the heat...with probably about 75% humidity (heat index was 107 degrees)....walking uphill and downhill to each ride. needless to say, this overweight, old and COPD-laden gal ended up in the first aid center. after a cool drink and a cold towel on my neck we headed back to the hotel. 

we got on the road the next day and saw some really amazingly beautiful scenery as we drove a different route out of the ozark  mountains heading towards oklahoma. we made it to pawhuska to the pioneer lady's mercantile and enjoyed shopping there...NOT. 3 little boys in a 'china' shop is not a good combo. i did enjoy seeing her wares but it was much more fun to go up to the bakery and find that they actually had one gluten-free offering - a chocolate fudgy cupcake.  i was glad to have been there at the Merc and probably would have spent a whole lot more money sans grandsons! so friday morning we got up and drove back to their city. i was so exhausted from sharing a bed with a wild child that i opted to stay an extra day in town just to get a good nights sleep. this was my 10th night in a hotel. i wanted to go home. 

we said our goodbyes amid tears and pouting - my grandson wanted to stay there for the summer as he usually does and the twins wanted him to stay. it just wasn't gonna work out this year. so on a promise for next summer, we departed and took a different rout home. we were also trying to outrace a storm. we headed toward el paso with las cruces as our destination. oh Lord Jesus, it took about 11 hours due to another 32-mile detour!  we ate, hit the sack and got going early on monday driving to tucson.

shortly after we got on the 2 lane highway, traffic jammed to almost a stop. up in front of us was a police escort with blinking lights. it appeared to be a gigantic shovel scoop off of a big rig caterpillar tractor thingy. so picture this: the shovel was the size of a semi-truck trailer. it was sideways on a tow vehicle, taking up both lanes of the highway. now picture 4 of these shovel scoops, each surrounded by police escorts and blinking lights. and picture them driving about 20 miles per hour.  and imagine this going on for AN HOUR! eventually there was an exit and each of the 'shovel scoops' exited the off ramp. oh good, they are letting traffic by, finally. oh no, that was not it. there was an accident that had closed one lane just on the other side of the offramp! GAH!  we did finally arrive in tucson and almost eactly oh time.  i might have made up a bit for the 20 mph speeds by driving slightly faster. 

we stayed there with friends for the night. that was a nice visit! our phoenix plans didnt work out so we left tucson qat 7a.m. on tuesday and drove all the way home...stopping only for breakfast, gas and rest rooms.  we got home to celebrate 4th of july.  (well i got my nails done - that was celebration enough for me. but my 'men' went to a pool party/bbq. i was too tired.).

so thats my journey for the summer of 2018. i hated the long drive...actually i dislike it more every time i do it. i want to get airline tickets for the next couple of visits. its a 3-hour trip to dallas if i get a nonstop. WAY better than a 3-day stint at the wheel.

Edited July 12, 2018 by zoomama
forgot a part about the drive; meant ozarks, not smokey

[Mindthinkr]

@zoomama I thought the Smokey Mountains were located in the western part of NC. 

Edited July 12, 2018 by Mindthinkr
Darn autocorrect

[zoomama]

15 minutes ago, Mindthinkr said:

@zoomama I thought the Smokey Mountains we’re located in the western part of NC. 

you were correct. it was the ozarks, sorry. 

Edited July 12, 2018 by zoomama

[Mindthinkr]

30 minutes ago, zoomama said:

you were correct. it was the ozarks, sorry. 

Well I’m glad that you made it home safely. I think that I’d go nuts with all those detours and long stretches. 

[Mindthinkr]

My friend called me tonight. She’s very worried. Her friend named Mark is on the verge of death but they still can’t make a definitive diagnosis or begin a treatment that will help him feel better;  would y’all please be kind and pray for him? I sincerely would appreciate it.  

[Jynnan tonnix]

22 hours ago, zoomama said:

jynnan --  you have quite a talent. that is a beauteous sketch(?) ---- you owe it to your wee one and yourself to keep practicing and do something with your talent that makes you happy. 

Thanks...I really do need to carve out the time to do it on a regular basis. It's not that I don't have the time, just that I mismanage and waste too much of it doing essentially nothing .

I wanted to go to art school when I was young, but that idea was nixed by my parents who insisted I find something more "practical". But back in those days, before the distractions of the internet and such, I was constantly drawing, and was much better than I am now. I look back on some of the work I did in my early 20's, even into my 30's,  and think I could never be able to capture something with such ease again. Though the drawing of Remy only took me an hour, maybe just a little more, to do. 

[doodlebug]

On ‎7‎/‎13‎/‎2018 at 9:10 AM, Jynnan tonnix said:

Thanks...I really do need to carve out the time to do it on a regular basis. It's not that I don't have the time, just that I mismanage and waste too much of it doing essentially nothing .

I wanted to go to art school when I was young, but that idea was nixed by my parents who insisted I find something more "practical". But back in those days, before the distractions of the internet and such, I was constantly drawing, and was much better than I am now. I look back on some of the work I did in my early 20's, even into my 30's,  and think I could never be able to capture something with such ease again. Though the drawing of Remy only took me an hour, maybe just a little more, to do. 

If you could achieve that in only an hour, I think you could recapture the skills of your younger years pretty quickly with a little time spent.  What a wonderful talent to have!  I wish I could do something similarly creative and I would imagine Remy's parents would absolutely treasure a sketch of their daughter done by her grandmother.

My aunt was artistic and I still have a tiny watercolor of me based on my second grade school photo that she gave my mother.  It's so sweet, I love it.

[bigskygirl]

Has anyone ever had medication allergy testing done before? I see the allergist on the 24th, and I notice they mention medication allergy testing on the paperwork they sent me. I will ask them to check my thyroid medication if possible because I have been sick ever since I started taking it. My anxiety has been bad the last few days, and I am in a cranky mood because of the blasted anxiety, heat, being tired, allergies acting up a little, and Saturday night some nitwits were setting off fireworks. They are lucky I did not run outside to slap the crap out of them.

Edited July 16, 2018 by bigskygirl

[lookeyloo]

3 minutes ago, bigskygirl said:

Has anyone ever had medication allergy testing done before? I see the allergist on the 24th, and I notice they mention medication allergy testing on the paperwork they sent me. I will ask them to check my thyroid medication if possible because I have been sick ever since I started taking it. My anxiety has been bad the last few days, and I am in a cranky mood because of the blasted anxiety, heat, being tired, allergies acting up a little, and Saturday night some nitwits were setting off fireworks. They are lucky I did not run outside to slap the crap out of them.

Just for fun I googled and Mayo Clinic and WEBMD has a bunch of info on it, but I haven't had it done.  I know what I am allergic to, codeine and compazine.  But I get a big reaction, not subtle.  And sometimes the drugs work with or against each other.  I hope you get it worked out!!

[bigskygirl]

No idea if I am allergic to it, but I would not be surprise if I am sensitive to it. I guess I could ask next week. I have a four month fellowup appointment with my endocrinologist in October. I should ask about it then, but I keep forgetting.  Got my three month teeth cleaning taken care of after my counseling appointment. They let me use their massage chair for fifteen minutes after I was done with my cleaning. Felt so good! Next week I have three appointments (counseling, allergist and my favorite one of all three fillings on Wednesday morning,) Maybe I will ask to use the message chair again after I am through because I will be there for at least a hour.

[lookeyloo]

I make lists for the doctors so I don't forget.  When I had my hip replaced I had several pages of questions and the dr. said I was his most "thorough" patient!  I don't know if he was annoyed, but, he did answer every question to my satisfaction.

[bigskygirl]

I probably would make a list and forget to bring it with me. My dental hygienist also deals with anxiety issues. Last week I went out by myself and soon as I got in the car the anxiety kicked into overdrive for some reason. I had to turn around and come home. She said it happened to her once on the interstate between Helena and Boulder. Her husband came to get her because she did not want to keep driving because of the curves in the road can be dangerous especially if you cannot focus on your driving.

[zoomama]

On 7/16/2018 at 2:36 PM, lookeyloo said:

I make lists for the doctors so I don't forget.  When I had my hip replaced I had several pages of questions and the dr. said I was his most "thorough" patient!  I don't know if he was annoyed, but, he did answer every question to my satisfaction.

i am the same way --- written list in hand.

[Fuzzysox]

Did the layout of the board change? I really hate it it's super hard to read now. I think it's been tried before if I remember correctly and it changed back.

[Marigold]

I made it back from tent camping!

Catching up on all the posts. 

 

We weren't really vacationing.  My daughter had a national dance competition and the hotel rates would've cost us about $2,000.  We opted for tent camping for less than $300.   My daughter did well!  She won a few awards and we left very happy.  

So, a week in a tent with dance costumes, a bunch of kids and a very old Suburban.  But I did it!!!   My husband did not go.  I am a bad ass tent camper!  :)

[SunnyBeBe]

On 7/16/2018 at 9:00 AM, bigskygirl said:

Has anyone ever had medication allergy testing done before? I see the allergist on the 24th, and I notice they mention medication allergy testing on the paperwork they sent me. I will ask them to check my thyroid medication if possible because I have been sick ever since I started taking it. My anxiety has been bad the last few days, and I am in a cranky mood because of the blasted anxiety, heat, being tired, allergies acting up a little, and Saturday night some nitwits were setting off fireworks. They are lucky I did not run outside to slap the crap out of them.

I was scheduled to have it done last year, but, got chicken and cancelled.  I do need to do it though.  My situation is because when I was a kid, I was allergic to penicillin.  Doctors think it's important to find out if you are still allergic as an adult, because, if you get an infection that needed it, you could use it, if you are no longer allergic.  This is becoming increasingly important, as illnesses are become more and more resistant to antibiotics.  I had an infection that eventually cleared up, but, they wanted to use the med that I was allergic to.  

It's not risk free to have the test done.  They actually give you a little of the drug and wait to see what happens.  They have life support and doctors on hand to save you if necessary.  That's how they explained it to me. So, you can see how I had trouble going through with it.  

[lookeyloo]

9 hours ago, Marigold said:

I made it back from tent camping!

Catching up on all the posts. 

 

We weren't really vacationing.  My daughter had a national dance competition and the hotel rates would've cost us about $2,000.  We opted for tent camping for less than $300.   My daughter did well!  She won a few awards and we left very happy.  

So, a week in a tent with dance costumes, a bunch of kids and a very old Suburban.  But I did it!!!   My husband did not go.  I am a bad ass tent camper!  :)

Granddaughter had a dance competition last weekend. She and her mother share rooms with other mothers/daughters.  It sounds like a nightmare to me.  We can watch her livestream from home so that's a bonus.  She won something - I tell her she "gets that from me" as in Dirty Dancing, but, alas, she doesn't.

[doodlebug]

27 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I was scheduled to have it done last year, but, got chicken and cancelled.  I do need to do it though.  My situation is because when I was a kid, I was allergic to penicillin.  Doctors think it's important to find out if you are still allergic as an adult, because, if you get an infection that needed it, you could use it, if you are no longer allergic.  This is becoming increasingly important, as illnesses are become more and more resistant to antibiotics.  I had an infection that eventually cleared up, but, they wanted to use the med that I was allergic to.  

It's not risk free to have the test done.  They actually give you a little of the drug and wait to see what happens.  They have life support and doctors on hand to save you if necessary.  That's how they explained it to me. So, you can see how I had trouble going through with it.  

It is absolutely important that anyone diagnosed with a penicillin allergy as  child get tested.  The vast majority of adults who think they are allergic to penicillin are not, and, as noted above, penicillin and related drugs are extremely versatile and it really handcuffs the doctor if he/she cannot use them. Most of us end up needing antibiotics for a serious infection at some point, not being able to get penicillin can have major consequences. Also, sick kids get rashes all the time, not from antibiotics, just because they're sick.  So, a lot of sick kids who got a rash while taking penicillin and were told they were allergic to it , were never allergic at all.

[bigskygirl]

Crap! Here comes the side effects from the medication for depression. Last week I noticed my eyes were starting to bother me again with the light sensitivity getting worse again, dry eyes, and eye pain. I could not sleep last night because I was having bad stomach cramps, along with having bad headaches, the heat bothering me more, and aches and pain since I started taking it three weeks ago. The anxiety is not getting better. It has been kicking into overdrive since last weekend. It is to the point I am afraid to go out by myself because it can kick in as soon as I get into the car. I do better around other people, but if I go in a place where a lot of people are around I start to get a little more anxious. I am waiting to hear from my physician assistant to see if she can put me on something else since I do not see the psychiatrist until September 5th. I have my appointment with the allergist next Tuesday, and a dental appointment next Wednesday morning to get three cavities taken care of. I hope I can handle all my appointments next week especially since I had to wait two months to see the allergist.

[Ijustwantsomechips]

14 hours ago, doodlebug said:

It is absolutely important that anyone diagnosed with a penicillin allergy as  child get tested.  The vast majority of adults who think they are allergic to penicillin are not, and, as noted above, penicillin and related drugs are extremely versatile and it really handcuffs the doctor if he/she cannot use them. Most of us end up needing antibiotics for a serious infection at some point, not being able to get penicillin can have major consequences. Also, sick kids get rashes all the time, not from antibiotics, just because they're sick.  So, a lot of sick kids who got a rash while taking penicillin and were told they were allergic to it , were never allergic at all.

That’s interesting Doodlebug. I was told I was allergic to penicillin after breaking out in hives from head to toe in high school after I took amoxicillin for tonsillitis for about 10 days.  And I got that weird feeling you get in your throat when it feels like it wants to close up.  The hives were so bad the treating physician did a double take when he saw me.  I literally looked like a human-lizard hybrid. IDK if it was the amoxicillin or not, but I ended up at the ER three times in less than 36 hours and had three shots in my butt!  I won’t even handle a bottle of penicillin now.  Can’t take that chance again. It was hands down the worst medical experience of my life. 

[SunnyBeBe]

I had an allergic reaction to another antibiotic too!  A couple of years ago I had an EXTREME rash after taking Clindamycin for a full course.  If I had just stopped taking it, I think it wouldn't have happened, but, almost at the end of the course, it hit big time.  I won't test for that one.  But, I will the penicillin, since, it's been so long since I took it.  ALSO, I think that I accidentally took my brothers Penicillin that was in the fridge as a teen.  I think I took 2 tablespoons of it and nothing happened.  But, I won't trust my memory.  I'll get it checked out professionally.