S06.E15: Secrets Revealed, Part 1

[ZaldamoWilder]

If Amber was such a devote Catholic, she would know the word is devout (Catholic). Dumbass!

 

Anybody who still thinks she went to Columbia please raise your hand.

 

The psychic twins were very vague in there readings, all they had to do is watch the news to "read" those girls.  I did love the question they put to Amber about having someone difficult in her life and she went right to Melissa and not Jim! LOL.  Not being Catholic...is it a bad thing to have your astrology chart done or to have a reading?

 

Dina needs to quit all this mother/daughter stuff, first it was the tattoo, now it is the nose jobs, what is next?

 

 

Not exclusive to Catholicism but it can be viewed as idolatry.   Worshiping, idealizing or investing belief and faith in anything other than the word of God is a no no.   Jury's still out on the church's position on the systemic life destroying practice of raping children, but that's another story for another day.   That's why she kept reiterating "this is just for fun, right?"  because the belief in anything other than God's word if you're truly devote lol is like cheating on Jesus.

[jinjer]

Is Jim an Aries or Taurus or whatever the hell Melissa is?

[jennylauren123]

Ambuh not only had trouble with the word "devote" vs. "devout," she also couldn't figure out that the plural of "divorce" is "divorces." Not exactly college material there. 

 

Has anyone else noticed the weird thing that she does with her mouth? I think it's a habit. Imagine that you just ate graham crackers and some of the mash has found its way between your front teeth and upper lip. (Sorry, gross; I know.) It's not pretty, but you have to swipe it off with your tongue.

 

Ambuh makes that move pretty often, and not while eating. Very odd!

Edited November 21, 2014 by jennylauren123

[ghoulina]

Dina wanted a threesome with the Marcrazies? Man, that dude is beyond delusional. 

[goofygirl]

Yep, I really enjoyed being notified by Ambuh (love that, btw) that she was a DEVOTE Catholic.  That just made me laugh.  She also said she'd conferred with a priest before going to the reading. OK, AND she genuflected somewhere along the line.  I'm thinking she must not have been a Catholic growing up? Girl is completely a sham. OK, she had "the cancer".  Everything else about her is a joke. Including that dumbass she's married to.

[mwell345]

 

According to Radaronline, Looks like Dina wanted a threesome with Jim.  Oh wait, JIM confirmed the deets.  Lol.  But maybe Dina was the one who wanted a scene cut from the show because she was talking about Tommy liking it up the ass.

 

Jim tweeted this some time ago.  He said Dina wanted to "watch" him and Amber.

[jaync]

So, "high-maintenance" is another way of saying "uncontrollable brat"?

 

The AstroTwins could pass for Toni Collette's sisters.

 

Teresa definitely believes in astrology, because she once excused Juicy's behavior on him being a Gemini. Seriously.

 

Dina needs to quit all this mother/daughter stuff, first it was the tattoo, now it is the nose jobs, what is next?

Butthole bleaching?

Edited November 21, 2014 by jaync

[ghoulina]

Yep, I really enjoyed being notified by Ambuh (love that, btw) that she was a DEVOTE Catholic.

 

Well, we saw what a devote Catholic she was by how she observed the Lentil season. 

[Baltimore Betty]

So, "high-maintenance" is another way of saying "uncontrollable brat"?

 

The AstroTwins could pass for Toni Collette's sisters.

 

Teresa definitely believes in astrology, because she once excused Juicy's behavior on him being a Gemini. Seriously.

 

Butthole bleaching?

I was going to post that I thought the twin psychics looked like Toni Collette but I thought I would have been alone in that thought.

 

Yes, Dina's mother daughter thing could very well turn in that direction but I am begging Bravo not to film it.

[featherhead]

Well, we saw what a devote Catholic she was by how she observed the Lentil season.

Or the "toast" she gets at Church...

[LoLo]

Milannia is punished for some reason & sent to her room. She breaks out & then tells her mother to "shut her butthole" & neither parent does anything. She then goes on to be disrespectful & again nothing. We've all had our kids leave time out or talk back here or there but I can say in all honesty that none of my kids ever told me to "shut up". When she "escaped" she should have been taken back to her room & time added on. It's not cute & they are not doing her any favors by letting her get away with everything. They seem to encourage her behavior, the other 3 girls we never see behaving that way. My middle son was a handful & full of energy but not disrespectful to anyone.

 

Amber says she likes Jim's ex & gets along with her but then makes it sound as if it was the ex's fault for the long divorce. If you look up Jim's divorce he tried to say his ex was unfit & wrongfully having their son diagnosed, he wanted full custody. The judge sided with the wife & didn't find any of it to be true. Jim's slimy through & through. Then the pig comments, 1 comment I could take but he can't stop himself & had to go on & on.

 

The girls acting out Amber's commercial wasn't funny & Melissa was trying so hard to look good (I'm not saying she doesn't) it's just she's always trying. If you're sexy you don't have to constantly try to hard. I will be happy if I never had to see the twins in a bikini again.

 

Amber needs to go to confession for talking with the spiritual twins but has zero problem rolling around on stage & camera like a stripper, showing how to give oral sex to a bottle etc. She has more things to worry about in confessional than meeting with the twins. I'm so over her loud, attention seeking voice & laugh.

[Rahul]

 

Dina needs to quit all this mother/daughter stuff, first it was the tattoo, now it is the nose jobs, what is next? 

 

Matching mother/daughter vaginoplasty, of course!

 

Amber's behavior regarding the astrology reading was truly offensive. You would have thought she was taking part in some kind of ritual blood sacrifice replete with human remains. My god. I also caught the "devote" error and turned on my captions to see if Bravo would be snarky and caption it as such with quotes, but no such luck. Cannot believe this woman went to Columbia--it must've been the continuing education school/program which does not have the same stringent standards of admission for its matriculants.

Edited November 23, 2014 by Rahul

[Rhetorica]

Well remember, Kelly went to Columbia too, or as Bethany asked, was that the country?

[AnnA]

Well, we saw what a devote Catholic she was by how she observed the Lentil season. 

 

 

Or the "toast" she gets at Church...

 

Amber has bigger problems than worrying about how astrology fits into the Catholic religion.  Let's not forget that Amber, the "devote" Catholic hasn't mentioned the fact that she's married to a divorced Catholic.  Unless things have changed radically in the Catholic religion since a minute ago, that's a big no-no.

[Scottish Girl]

Amber is such a weirdo. I'd also bet money that she didn't consult a priest. No way does a priest give permission for that. No way. No how.

Edited November 22, 2014 by Scottish Girl

[Rhetorica]

I forgot this was on so I watched it this morning on demand. I think Bravo should have kept their secrets to themselves.

[Mondrianyone]

Cannot believe this woman went to Columbia--it must've been the continuing education school/program which does not have the same stringent standards of admission for its matriculants.

She didn't go to Columbia for her undergraduate degree, although she seems to go out of her way to create that impression.  Apparently she went to Monmouth University (maybe Marblemouth University would be more like it, given how she mangles the English language), which is where I think she met Melissa.  And then she got a graduate degree in exercise physiology, where I'm assuming the academic bar was set somewhat lower than at Columbia College.

[B3cky50]

I didn't think Milania's heavy handed makeup application was that bad. At least not by Real Housewives standards. Or Teen Moms....

It looked ten times better than Amber's talking heads.

[lilmarysunshine]

Teresa would cut off her left tit if it brought a promise of one of her fourbeautifuldaughters achieving even a fraction of the Kardashian fame and fortune; the woman has zero shame. She's already pimped Gia's backside in a scene or two.

Agreed.

 

And the whole "conservative Italian" thing would be part of the their story and family angst. Joe wringiing his hands about how inappropriate Gia dresses yet she does it, anyway, as mom looks on. Just like Bruce Jenner pretending his standards are high.

 

I have a 15 year old daughter. There is no way I'd let her perform the way Gia does. It's not even good. I think you can push the envelope if it is truly art and you're good. This isn't approaching good. That video is just awful.  I spend a lot of time around 13 year old girls. Gia is way too "mature" for her age.

[Marigold]

OK, I'm gonna defend Amber for one quick moment.

She did say that when she got the cancer, she got more religious. Maybe she is a "revert" and is actually like a new Catholic?

However, I'm not Catholic and even I knew all the stuff she said wrong!

[RazzleberryPie]

OK, I'm gonna defend Amber for one quick moment.

She did say that when she got the cancer, she got more religious. Maybe she is a "revert" and is actually like a new Catholic?

However, I'm not Catholic and even I knew all the stuff she said wrong!

This is what I presumed as well. She got The Cancer, got scared and started going to church and praying a lot, but doesn't actually understand or try to understand doctrine. Also, a whole lot of women swing from poles until they land a husband and become mothers, then suddenly become very 'devout' - much like Melissa in the first season. I don't know if they were just wild to land a man and then reverted to their real personalities, are playing a role of respectable mother and pillar of the community, or actually have a sincere calling to serve God. 

 

I wondered for a split second if she was Canadian when she talked about being a devoat Catholic. I have no idea what she's talking about with toast at Mass. I've seen communion wafers, pieces of bread, little saltine type crackers, but toast? Eh, did she mean the Host? None of these women have a strong command of any language.

Edited November 25, 2014 by RazzleberryPie

[Scottish Girl]

I can get down with Amber's faith being whatever she chooses. But, as a fairly 'devote' Catholic myself, it aggravates me that this is the one she chose. Lol. Plus, she's lying. As I said before, no priest would ever okay a visit to an astrologer. Period. It isn't like drinking or gambling that we can do in moderation. (Yay us!) It's a sin and a bad idea to open the door to "witchcraft" of any kind. Now, I'm not saying that plenty of us don't still do it. Lord knows, I'm a true Gemini woman. I'm interested in astrology and some psychic stuff, though you couldn't pay my ass to TOUCH a Ouija board! But, like birth control, it's something we might do that we'd never tell our priest about, and he'd never give us permission for it anyway. It's really basic to the faith. Just like the deal with the host. In my experience, we either call it the host or the body of Christ. It isn't bread, a cracker, or especially TOAST. It's actually His body. Again, very basic Catholicism. She's just lying about these tiny things that don't really matter, which always creeps me out. If you'll lie about unimportant things, why would I ever believe you about big things?

I may just be projecting. I was just told on Facebook that I couldn't add anything to a conversation because I wasn't "really a Christian." It hurt my feelings a little. But, if the only Catholics some people ever "know" are people like these women, we're all in trouble.

[RazzleberryPie]

Amber isn't that smart. I can't imagine any priest or minister okaying seeing psychics or astrologers, either. There is specific scripture forbidding soothsayers, witches, etc., and trying to see the future, plus we were always taught the moral of not dealing with that stuff is that it puts your faith and trust in something besides God, plus a lot of them are con artists who are just taking your money. 

 

I want to know what was in her Catholic (Designer) Bag of Tricks. I'm presuming her rosary, some medals and maybe some Holy Water? I have personally never seen a regular person carry around one of those portable mass kits like you see priests or lay clergy carry around in hospitals, plus it was too flat to hold chalice or much.

[Muffyn]

I want to know what was in her Catholic (Designer) Bag of Tricks. I'm presuming her rosary, some medals and maybe some Holy Water? I have personally never seen a regular person carry around one of those portable mass kits like you see priests or lay clergy carry around in hospitals, plus it was too flat to hold chalice or much.

Perhaps she can use it to perform an exorcism on Jim.  

[kassa]

Let's not forget that Amber, the "devote" Catholic hasn't mentioned the fact that she's married to a divorced Catholic.  Unless things have changed radically in the Catholic religion since a minute ago, that's a big no-no.

 

 

Jim doesn't know how to cross himself, which casts doubt on him ever even making first communion, let alone being confirmed, or remotely "devote."  

 

And Amber, knowing you're going to commit a sin, fake protesting that you're not going to do it because it's a sin, then doing it with a giggle and an "I'll confess it!" is a bigger sin than just not considering it all that bad in the first place.   At least the latter has a certain element of intellectual consistency.

Edited November 26, 2014 by kassa

[FairyDusted]

I'm pretty sure Ambuh said she converted 5 years ago. Very badly IMO.  

[Marigold]

Yep, I bet that is it!  She thought "the host" was "toast".  Oh, that is a riot. 

 

I bet her Catholic bag of tricks is the stuff that she took with her oncology appointments. Probably rosary beads and medals of special saints etc. Things that might comfort you during a medical crisis.

 

Clearly, Amber has good intentions with the Catholic faith but I think she needs some classes etc. I imagine she was raised (loose) Catholic so when she finally "reverted" back to the church, she didn't need any classes and it's clear she didn't do any reading up on her own. She probably turned to God and her Catholic childhood faith during the cancer and really has a very limited knowledge but she shuffles along doing the best she can.  Kinda sad that she has no one in her life to explain that it is not "lentil season" and not "the toast" but rather "The Host" etc.

[Bronzedog]

I have nothing to add other than I had lentil soup for lunch and it made me think of these losers.

[bosawks]

I have nothing to add other than I had lentil soup for lunch and it made me think of these losers.

Did it make you feel closer to God?

[Bronzedog]

Not really, but, I'm pretty sure if I had been in Atlanta, it would have made me juvial.

[Betweenyouandme]

Does anyone know if Dina got the nose job? Are there "after" pictures?