Except Chelsea (and Cole)

[Christina87]

1 hour ago, Scarlett45 said:

I think extended family structures are very important (I mean when they are healthy, non toxic, non abusive of course), and based on my own life experience relatives outside of the nuclear family can enrich a child’s life so much (and an adult’s life as well); but I don’t think that replaces a parent relationship. It’s an entirely different level. (Again I’m talking about actual parents, not sperm/egg donors and surrogates)

Aubree will love Cole based on who Cole is and how he treats her, and those feelings will grow in an organic way if they are allowed to. If one day Aubree wants Cole to be her legal parent because of those feelings I would hate hate hate for her to think that made her “disloyal” or “ungrateful” to any of her Lind relatives- it doesn’t. Her emotional needs for a second parent (in this case a father) would come first because ADAM has been a piece of shit from day 1. I would also hate for the poor girl to feel guilty if she does not ever want to be adopted by Cole, even though she does love him. 

Aubree is 9, she’s old enough to have complex emotions and understand the family dynamics. It’s best to lay OFF the girl now that she knows adoption by Cole is an option. Listen to Randy here and just lay off. 

That's a really good post!!! I had never thought about it like that. It's basically like she would have a complete family, because she would have a non-deadbeat father, but keep the extended lind family. At this point, she probably is getting to know Cole's family, but they could never be a substitute for the Linds. She would basically be getting bonus relatives on Cole's side! She will probably get to know his extended family more as her younger siblings develop relationships with them, and the more people to love Aubree, the better! I had never really thought of it in that way. 

[Scarlett45]

7 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

That's a really good post!!! I had never thought about it like that. It's basically like she would have a complete family, because she would have a non-deadbeat father, but keep the extended lind family. At this point, she probably is getting to know Cole's family, but they could never be a substitute for the Linds. She would basically be getting bonus relatives on Cole's side! She will probably get to know his extended family more as her younger siblings develop relationships with them, and the more people to love Aubree, the better! I had never really thought of it in that way. 

Yes that’s exactly how I saw it. Just more people to love Aubree. 

[lilmarysunshine]

6 hours ago, ghoulina said:

That's what I'm thinking. IF Cole adopted Aubree, that would not mean she would have to stop seeing the Linds. Honestly, Chelsea has no obligation to any of them other than Adumb. And she's let Aubree be involved in their lives for years. I think she's been very patient, considering how unreliable Donna has been in certain matters. All this being in the uncle's wedding and at family events? That's because Chelsea allows it. I don't see her stopping just because Cole technically became Aubree's father. She wouldn't do something that would intentionally hurt Aubree. 

She hurts her all of the time as evidenced by the fact that we are all discussing Aubree's business. The kid has no privacy to deal with this.

[lilmarysunshine]

4 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

I will get on Chelsea’s case for not backing off and letting Aubree decide this (now or at 18) but I won’t critize her for “taking her away from the Linds” because adoption by Cole wouldn’t do that at all (in my mind). 

I don't think it would have to do that, either.  Happens when a parent dies and the surviving parent remarries and hopefully the deceased parent's family is still in the kid's life.

[DangerousMinds]

6 minutes ago, lilmarysunshine said:

She hurts her all of the time as evidenced by the fact that we are all discussing Aubree's business. The kid has no privacy to deal with this.

Thank you. I have been saying this for years.

[lilmarysunshine]

1 minute ago, DangerousMinds said:

Thank you. I have been saying this for years.

Yep. And for what? Money and attention. I don't care about a college fund or financial security, really. To me that is no excuse, particularly from someone who grew up wealthy. Thanks to daddy Randy, Chelsea has never had to worry about putting food on the table or things like that which would make her kind of desperate. (As much as I can't stand Kail, I can more understand Kail's willingness to do it as she had no safety net for her - Jo's parents for Isaac, maybe, but not really for her.)  I personally would rather my kids have control over the "narrative" of their lives and their personal struggles not be public fodder than they have money in the bank for college. They can earn it the old-fashioned way or I'll earn it.

[DangerousMinds]

Have any of the women in Chelsea's family even gone to college?

[lilmarysunshine]

2 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

Have any of the women in Chelsea's family even gone to college?

Good point.

Lets hope the younger kids, at least, get their work ethic from Cole. lol  (Though I'm afraid he's been tainted by all of this fame.)

[Christina87]

I've always thought that in a weird way, giving these kids money to go to college is a strange deal. Of course, going to college is a great thing, and it's a huge expense that I'm glad they don't have! However, if I were Aubree, I would side eye Chelsea using my shitty childhood situation to earn money so that she doesn't have to work. Yet, I've been filmed my entire life, and had my worst moments recorded for posterity, and then I have to go out and have a career when I grow up? Seems like the KIDS should be living the easy life, but instead they're exploited as children, and then have to live normal adult lives, with all the normal stressors, financial and otherwise. Meanwhile, the moms have it made: get rewarded for making a bad choice with fame and adoration, and paid out the wazoo so they can live on easy street. Of course they have faced criticism, but they signed up for it. If I were Aubree at the age Chelsea is now, getting up for work every morning and dealing with job stressors, I'd feel some resentment that Chelsea didn't have to do this because she exploited my childhood pain. I don't know how this could be avoided unless they said they wouldn't pay the girls, but would save the money for the kids when they grow up. It just seems unfair that these girls get to live on easy street at their kids' expense. At least Aubree gets to have her mother around, but some (like Leah's girlses) would probably be better off if raised in daycare! These girls weren't picked to raise their kids with no financial stress because of their merit, for sure. At least the kids do get college, but it'll be tough to be a hard worker, and presumably not wealthy, when all you ever saw was your parents hanging around and having 300K just deposited to their bank account. My dad set a great example for me; he earned a lot, but he also worked SUPER hard! These kids won't associate hard work with riches; they'll associate it with being poorer, which sucks. 

[Lemons]

3 hours ago, lilmarysunshine said:

I don't think it would have to do that, either.  Happens when a parent dies and the surviving parent remarries and hopefully the deceased parent's family is still in the kid's life.

Chelsea would be the type to make aubree call Cole’s mother grandma and slowly “forget” about the Linds.  She might even get herself to believe that they are one big happy all American family and that Adam never existed. 

[lilmarysunshine]

3 hours ago, Christina87 said:

I've always thought that in a weird way, giving these kids money to go to college is a strange deal. Of course, going to college is a great thing, and it's a huge expense that I'm glad they don't have! However, if I were Aubree, I would side eye Chelsea using my shitty childhood situation to earn money so that she doesn't have to work. Yet, I've been filmed my entire life, and had my worst moments recorded for posterity, and then I have to go out and have a career when I grow up? Seems like the KIDS should be living the easy life, but instead they're exploited as children, and then have to live normal adult lives, with all the normal stressors, financial and otherwise. Meanwhile, the moms have it made: get rewarded for making a bad choice with fame and adoration, and paid out the wazoo so they can live on easy street. Of course they have faced criticism, but they signed up for it. If I were Aubree at the age Chelsea is now, getting up for work every morning and dealing with job stressors, I'd feel some resentment that Chelsea didn't have to do this because she exploited my childhood pain. I don't know how this could be avoided unless they said they wouldn't pay the girls, but would save the money for the kids when they grow up. It just seems unfair that these girls get to live on easy street at their kids' expense. At least Aubree gets to have her mother around, but some (like Leah's girlses) would probably be better off if raised in daycare! These girls weren't picked to raise their kids with no financial stress because of their merit, for sure. At least the kids do get college, but it'll be tough to be a hard worker, and presumably not wealthy, when all you ever saw was your parents hanging around and having 300K just deposited to their bank account. My dad set a great example for me; he earned a lot, but he also worked SUPER hard! These kids won't associate hard work with riches; they'll associate it with being poorer, which sucks. 

I know I'm showing my middle-aged self here but ... I don't know ... I just don't get how quickly people give up their privacy and relative anonymity for money. Hand to God, I might like Kylie Jenner's money but I would NOT want her life. I would have rather run to the grocery store with just my 3 kids and not have people stare at them, take our pictures, want pictures with them, report online about them and sometimes struggle financially rather than rake in 6 figures by being on a reality show and shilling on Instagram. 

And these people do face a lot of scrutiny. Part of me feels like they must have thicker skin than me but Chelsea, for example, gets TONS of fans - people who affirm her and all of her choices. I'm sure her fans way outnumber people like us. lol

[druzy]

[Christina87]

Whoa!!!!!!! Clutching pearls. Coleyyyyyy just posted a nice picture with a regular, non-annoying caption!!! This day shall go down in the history books as a blessed day!!!

i'm SO shocked it's not, "look at my big boy 😍😍😍😍 I'm so dam proud to be his daddy u have no idea!!! 💪🏻 Strong boy too. Thank God (at) chelseahouska she is a dam hot amazing Smoke Show perfect wife. He gets his Good Looks from his Mommy that's for dam sure. 😍😍😍😍😍💕💕💕💕👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻 She makes life so dam fun with her Smokin body n smarts my kids have the Best!"

Ironically, the fact he didn't "prove" his love with a spectacle like that caption doesn't make me think he loves his family any less! Imagine that. It just means he's acting normal, for once! He loved Chelsea enough to marry her, and he has shown time and time again how much he loves his son, so...gasp. We're not going to be suspicious of his motives if he doesn't gush in every single post. Good job, coley. Keep it up!

Edited March 25, 2019 by Christina87

[heatherchandler]

On ‎3‎/‎23‎/‎2019 at 6:08 PM, lilmarysunshine said:

Aubree always looks at the cameras. Poor kid. She had NO CHOICE but to live her life this way and for the whole world to be privvy to her messy (through no fault of hers) relationship with her father. We all saw him refer to her as a “mistake” and she will see it, too, if she has not already, because Chelsea and Randy are thirsty. 

I’m gonna say it - Chelsea is a shit mother to do that to her because she is desperate for positive attention. I don’t care if her kids are better cared for than Jenelle’s. 

I have been regularly shouting it from the rooftops!  And I still cannot wrap my head around the fact that she is selling her daughter's soul to the devil and people think she is a great mom.

Edited March 25, 2019 by heatherchandler

[alexa]

7 hours ago, druzy said:

They both look so cute here 🙂  Great pic.

On 3/20/2019 at 9:51 AM, druzy said:

Is there a happier child?  He always looks so cheerful.

[blubld43]

2 hours ago, Christina87 said:

Whoa!!!!!!! Clutching pearls. Coleyyyyyy just posted a nice picture with a regular, non-annoying caption!!! This day shall go down in the history books as a blessed day!!!

i'm SO shocked it's not, "look at my big boy 😍😍😍😍 I'm so dam proud to be his daddy u have no idea!!! 💪🏻 Strong boy too. Thank God (at) chelseahouska she is a dam hot amazing Smoke Show perfect wife. He gets his Good Looks from his Mommy that's for dam sure. 😍😍😍😍😍💕💕💕💕👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻 She makes life so dam fun with her Smokin body n smarts my kids have the Best!"

Ironically, the fact he didn't "prove" his love with a spectacle like that caption doesn't make me think he loves his family any less! Imagine that. It just means he's acting normal, for once! He loved Chelsea enough to marry her, and he has shown time and time again how much he loves his son, so...gasp. We're not going to be suspicious of his motives if he doesn't gush in every single post. Good job, coley. Keep it up!

Dying laughing. No! He must be cheating on her, he didn't call her a smoke show!

[ChristmasJones]

On 3/24/2019 at 3:19 PM, Christina87 said:

if I were Aubree, I would side eye Chelsea using my shitty childhood situation to earn money so that she doesn't have to work. Yet, I've been filmed my entire life, and had my worst moments recorded for posterity, and then I have to go out and have a career when I grow up? Seems like the KIDS should be living the easy life, but instead they're exploited as children, and then have to live normal adult lives, with all the normal stressors, financial and otherwise. Meanwhile, the moms have it made: get rewarded for making a bad choice with fame and adoration, and paid out the wazoo so they can live on easy street.

These are some of the issues she'll be talking to a therapist about some day.  The difference will be that instead of just sharing their childhood memories, these kids will have videos to show the therapist. At some point, these TM mothers will have a lot of tough questions to answer from their kids.

[Christina87]

1 hour ago, ChristmasJones said:

These are some of the issues she'll be talking to a therapist about some day.  The difference will be that instead of just sharing their childhood memories, these kids will have videos to show the therapist. At some point, these TM mothers will have a lot of tough questions to answer from their kids.

Aubree: Mom, how could you? My therapist helped me to realize that my (insert serious issue) comes from the humiliation of growing up, constantly abandoned by my father on national television.

Chelsea: well, dad-uhhh would only rent me a townhouse, and I still had to work at Year Round Brown for two whole weeks! If I stayed on the show I got a real house-uh, and didn't have to work-uh! I could spend my day doing my hair-uh! Those extensions were expensive, and I needed those $98 see through leggings-uh! And I needed all those followers on Instagram for my self-esteem!"

aubree (staring blankly): well, now I have even more to talk about at my next therapy session!

[geauxaway]

And this is exactly why Chelsea and Cole are handling this whole situation so horribly.  Has it EVER been explained to Aubree that even if she wants Cole to adopt her, he legally CANNOT.   Quit perpetuating this false hope.  Until Adam is dead, signs a TPR, or is ordered a TPR, Cole cannot adopt Aubree.  

[Stusan]

7 hours ago, heatherchandler said:

I have been regularly shouting it from the rooftops!  And I still cannot wrap my head around the fact that she is selling her daughter's soul to the devil and people think she is a great mom.

There's being a great mom in real life (which looks like lots of things to a lot of different people) and then there's being a great mom in a series when comparing mom skills to all the other series' moms. It's not hard to come out on top when compared to the rest of this shit-show.

[alexa]

On 1/13/2019 at 4:21 PM, druzy said:

I love the hat, and it looks cool with the background in this photo.  Such a cutie!

[NannyBails]

I was unable to figure out how to copy the Instagram photo, but looks like Watson has dirt/food all over his face?   

I was a bit put off by Cole's "I want him to be just like me" comment.    A lot of the troubles I had with my mom growing up centered around me not being like her or not being who she wanted me to be.  It was painful knowing that I could only be loved if I acted a certain way/did things she wanted me to do.   So hopefully that's just a throw-away comment and not something he really aspires to, because what if Watson turns out to be different from Cole?  Would he still love Watson then?

On the other hand, I do think it's nice that Cole wants to be the best person HE can be to serve as a good role model for Watson.   

[heatherchandler]

16 hours ago, Stusan said:

There's being a great mom in real life (which looks like lots of things to a lot of different people) and then there's being a great mom in a series when comparing mom skills to all the other series' moms. It's not hard to come out on top when compared to the rest of this shit-show.

I agree that being a great mom is a lot of different things to a lot of different people - no one way to do it.  And I myself am NOT perfect - I have probably indirectly hurt my kids some way or form without doing it intentionally.  No one is perfect. Chelsea has down the basics - be kind to your kids, feed them, keep them out of danger, don't physically hurt them. 

But she is mentally hurting Aubree.  And I really want to say "IMO" but I can't imagine a world where taking money to show an audience of over a million people her real life daughter get hurt by her father over and over again is not a really bad thing to EVERYONE.  Can anyone disagree that what is going on right now is hurting her?  Adam is hurting her, but she is accepting MONEY to film it and show it to the world!  It is her storyline on a crappy cable tv show!  

And she is not intelligent at all - so it may not even occur to her that she is hurting her child.

I get upset about the way she talks about Grandma Donna, and how that bothers Aubree, but I myself have talked shit about my husband's mother in front of my kids - it is HARD to stop yourself, especially when worked up.

I understand wanting to take up for her, I used to like her myself.  I just realized over time that this is so not ok, and I think I need to stop watching the show.  Or maybe I should just ff her scenes.

[Scarlett45]

6 hours ago, NannyBails said:

I was unable to figure out how to copy the Instagram photo, but looks like Watson has dirt/food all over his face?   

I was a bit put off by Cole's "I want him to be just like me" comment.    A lot of the troubles I had with my mom growing up centered around me not being like her or not being who she wanted me to be.  It was painful knowing that I could only be loved if I acted a certain way/did things she wanted me to do.   So hopefully that's just a throw-away comment and not something he really aspires to, because what if Watson turns out to be different from Cole?  Would he still love Watson then?

On the other hand, I do think it's nice that Cole wants to be the best person HE can be to serve as a good role model for Watson.   

I don’t think Cole means it like that. If you like yourself, I would think it’s natural to want your children to be like you.

Not that you’d love them any less if they were different than you but parents are people too, it’s often easier to like and bond with humans that are like ourselves. (Share our interests etc) And I’ve often noticed if someone has multiple children, they are often emotionally closer and actual FRIENDS in adulthood with the child that is most like them. 

[lilmarysunshine]

11 hours ago, NannyBails said:

I was unable to figure out how to copy the Instagram photo, but looks like Watson has dirt/food all over his face?   

I was a bit put off by Cole's "I want him to be just like me" comment.    A lot of the troubles I had with my mom growing up centered around me not being like her or not being who she wanted me to be.  It was painful knowing that I could only be loved if I acted a certain way/did things she wanted me to do.   So hopefully that's just a throw-away comment and not something he really aspires to, because what if Watson turns out to be different from Cole?  Would he still love Watson then?

Sounds like narcissism to me. I'm mom to 3 kids. God,I hope my kids are better than me because I'm so far from perfect. My husband's former boss once said "God, please give me anything but what I *deserve*" and I can totally relate to that.

On a completely shallow note, I don't think Cole will age well. He sure seems to have a lot of wrinkles for someone in his 20s? I think in that picture he looks like a dad in his 40s to me.

[alexa]

5 minutes ago, lilmarysunshine said:

Sounds like narcissism to me. I'm mom to 3 kids. God,I hope my kids are better than me because I'm so far from perfect. My husband's former boss once said "God, please give me anything but what I *deserve*" and I can totally relate to that.

On a completely shallow note, I don't think Cole will age well. He sure seems to have a lot of wrinkles for someone in his 20s? I think in that picture he looks like a dad in his 40s to me.

The wrinkles in that photo are from his expression, not old man wrinkles!  Seriously that is a normal thing. Some people have prominent ones on their forehead or near their eyes, etc. I think he looks like a mature 20 something but not 40. 

As for all of the comments about what he says on Instagram, I just feel he is saying things that he feels and it always seems his every word is over evaluated. I guess I just don’t relate to that as I typically look at those comments as something that person wants to say. I never see it as meant for me, but more about that person expressing themselves and showing a part of their personality. 

[lilmarysunshine]

I don't think those are just from smiling. I have noticed it before, too, while watching the show but I was surprised to see him looking this old in this picture.

[Christina87]

1 hour ago, lilmarysunshine said:

I don't think those are just from smiling. I have noticed it before, too, while watching the show but I was surprised to see him looking this old in this picture.

I think we talked about it a while back! He has aged a lot since he met Chelsea. 

[Lemons]

3 hours ago, lilmarysunshine said:

Sounds like narcissism to me. I'm mom to 3 kids. God,I hope my kids are better than me because I'm so far from perfect. My husband's former boss once said "God, please give me anything but what I *deserve*" and I can totally relate to that.

On a completely shallow note, I don't think Cole will age well. He sure seems to have a lot of wrinkles for someone in his 20s? I think in that picture he looks like a dad in his 40s to me.

I said narcissism too but someone deleted my comment so I’ll write it again. I’ve never heard anyone say “I hope my child is just like me when he/she grows up!”  Unless it’s a narcissist. Most of us see our flaws and hope our children don’t get stuck with them and most parents hope their children will surpass them in every way. 

[lilmarysunshine]

2 minutes ago, Lemons said:

I said narcissism too but someone deleted my comment so I’ll write it again. I’ve never heard anyone say “I hope my child is just like me when he/she grows up!”  Unless it’s a narcissist. Most of us see our flaws and hope our children don’t get stuck with them and most parents hope their children will surpass them in every way. 

Yeah. He didn't say "I want him to grow up just like me" because then maybe he meant that Watson could experience growing up like he did - not that he would be a Cole copy. But saying "I want him to be just like me?"  Very odd. Sounds like he's let all of the Chelsea fans and their adoration get to his head.

Fame is a bitch, I tell ya. He did not strike me like this when he first showed up.

[BlancheDevoreaux]

On 3/25/2019 at 8:59 PM, geauxaway said:

And this is exactly why Chelsea and Cole are handling this whole situation so horribly.  Has it EVER been explained to Aubree that even if she wants Cole to adopt her, he legally CANNOT.   Quit perpetuating this false hope.  Until Adam is dead, signs a TPR, or is ordered a TPR, Cole cannot adopt Aubree.  

I think it all started when Adam allowed Paislee's step-dad to adopt her so that made Chelsea and Cole think that maybe Adam would allow the same for Aubree.

[ghoulina]

15 hours ago, Christina87 said:

I think we talked about it a while back! He has aged a lot since he met Chelsea. 

Having two kids close in age will do that to you. 

[geauxaway]

At this point, Chelse (and Cole) are both going on 30 and should recognize the stress they are putting on Aubree and see if it reflect onto Chelsea, who at 17 or whatever decided to get knocked up by some loser.  TBH, that should be their goal.  Not all this BS about fake adoption. Chelsea maybe should look in a mirror about her own daddy issues and see where it all went sideways.  If they don’t figure it out, Aubree will be a TM4.  Clearly, Chelsea had Randilicious and Mary as parents and she still mananged to get prego and put off her GED.  That did not curtail her from still fucking Adam and prob would have continued until she met COLEYYYYY at the gas station. This girl wants to erase her past SO BAD!!! 

Most of us has have been there, done that, without the TM pay check. 

BUCK UP, CHELSEA! 🤣.   Isn’t that your whole MO?   

[ShaNaeNae]

10 hours ago, geauxaway said:

At this point, Chelse (and Cole) are both going on 30 and should recognize the stress they are putting on Aubree and see if it reflect onto Chelsea, who at 17 or whatever decided to get knocked up by some loser.  TBH, that should be their goal.  Not all this BS about fake adoption. Chelsea maybe should look in a mirror about her own daddy issues and see where it all went sideways.  If they don’t figure it out, Aubree will be a TM4.  Clearly, Chelsea had Randilicious and Mary as parents and she still mananged to get prego and put off her GED.  That did not curtail her from still fucking Adam and prob would have continued until she met COLEYYYYY at the gas station. This girl wants to erase her past SO BAD!!! 

That's where I often wonder what went wrong.  Both Chelsea and her sister got pregnant as teenagers.  The way she had no self worth, pined over a loser who clearly could give two shits about her made me think that's usually what girls with daddy issues act like.  But she was close to her dad.  

I also think she'd still be after Adam if it wasn't for Cole.  I hear, "so glad she kicked Adam to the curb and got a good guy".  She didn't kick him to the curb, he kicked her several times over and then she met Cole.  

I too worry about Aubree becoming a TM.  Since it tends to repeat itself.  All she has seen from Chelsea is her either crying over Adam or hanging onto every word Cole says and "let's call Cole..." for this or that.  I wish she'd show her independence and learning to love yourself without a man.  

[Scarlett45]

1 hour ago, ShaNaeNae said:

The way she had no self worth, pined over a loser who clearly could give two shits about her made me think that's usually what girls with daddy issues act like.  But she was close to her dad.  

I know sometimes people (not you, society in general) like to think all of women’s bad decisions are about men (a father that wasn’t there, a previous bad romantic relationship with a man etc) but sometimes people (including women) just make BAD CHOICES and it has nothing to do with what another man did.

I think Chelsea was a person with low self esteem (for whatever reason) and latched onto Adam (having a baby with him made it worse). She did go to therapy and work through her issues, but I think it may have even in her best interests not to meet her “Cole” until this year, giving her a few years of emotional independence before getting serious with someone. @Christina87 had a similar romantic experience with an “Adam” type as a young woman and she has elborated on the mindset. 

[Christina87]

@Scarlett45 absolutely!!! The cliff notes version is I have a dad just like Randy (down to even being a dentist!) and I thought that every guy would be trustworthy and have my best interests at heart. I'd never been exposed to scummy men at all! My adam was also a very accomplished straight A student who was very wholesome, but deep down was manipulative and cruel. It never occurred to me that a straight A student whose father was a doctor, who had the Pinterest perfectly life in suburbia, could be a "bad boy." As soon as I got reeled in, he treated me just like adam treated Chelsea for four years (though, like them, he dumped me cruelly several times, and then weaseled his way back in). My parents and friends all constantly told me to walk away and never look back, but I was stuck! When I finally did leave, there was no Cole waiting to magically take on all my baggage, so I had to work through my issues myself, and with the help of a counselor. At the time, I was so jealous of girls like Chelsea who got "rescued," but now I'm glad that I can stand on my own two feet, with healthy self-esteem. I remember how horrible it felt to be insecure, and I'd never wish that on anybody. A few years later, I found a good man and had a healthy relationship, and since then, I have had a few more. Even though I'm currently single, I still feel like I have a happy ending, because I'm in a place to have an insecurity-free relationship, and my issues are in the past!

i agree a zillion percent that I wish Chelsea had had a few years of independence, where she could have figured out who she was, and learned to proudly stand on her own two feet before being in another relationship. She is so, so dependent on Cole, and it would be uncomfortable to be so dependent on one person for your validation, your opinion of yourself, and your happiness. 

I'm so glad that when I have relationships now, that baggage has been reclaimed, and is ancient history. Emotional abuse does a number on you, but I feel it's your job to take care of it, because it's not your future partner's responsibility to pay for what someone else did to you. 

[druzy]

[Scarlett45]

49 minutes ago, druzy said:

She looks like Watson here. I like her headband. 

[alexa]

1 hour ago, druzy said:

She is getting cuter...this is a great pic.  I didn't think she was all that cute before, but I love this pic...

[DangerousMinds]

4 hours ago, ShaNaeNae said:

That's where I often wonder what went wrong.  Both Chelsea and her sister got pregnant as teenagers.  The way she had no self worth, pined over a loser who clearly could give two shits about her made me think that's usually what girls with daddy issues act like.  But she was close to her dad.  

I also think she'd still be after Adam if it wasn't for Cole.  I hear, "so glad she kicked Adam to the curb and got a good guy".  She didn't kick him to the curb, he kicked her several times over and then she met Cole.  

I too worry about Aubree becoming a TM.  Since it tends to repeat itself.  All she has seen from Chelsea is her either crying over Adam or hanging onto every word Cole says and "let's call Cole..." for this or that.  I wish she'd show her independence and learning to love yourself without a man.  

There don’t seem to be any strong, independent, ambitious women in Chelsea’s family. I wonder if Randy would have coddled a son as much as he has Chelsea/

[SnarkEnthusiast]

5 hours ago, ShaNaeNae said:

I too worry about Aubree becoming a TM.  Since it tends to repeat itself.  All she has seen from Chelsea is her either crying over Adam or hanging onto every word Cole says and "let's call Cole..." for this or that.  I wish she'd show her independence and learning to love yourself without a man.  

I think that Aubree's risk factors will also be inevitably exacerbated by the isolation/jealousy from watching Chelsea with her crop of do over kids. I wouldn't be surprised if C&C have anywhere from one to three more babies stacked one after the other. Aubree will still be an emotional only child by virtue of age difference when she is in high school, whereas all her siblings will be a little team growing up together. There's bound to be some sadness and resentment there, especially with your siblings and stepdad plastered with loving captions all over Instagram. In contrast, there's years of footage of your mom talking about what a deadbeat piece of shit your dad is and yet groveling every other week for him to take her back before building a new life with her new husband and bragging about having 1 million babies – with you being very painfully aware that you will always be on an island away from that happy, sunny success story. At this point, even though she loves her, Chelsea seems almost inconvenienced by Aubree as a reminder of her shitty pre-Cole life and baggage.

And for the love of God, can this infantile nearly 30-year-old woman do anything without Cole? "So-and-so just sent this, let me tell Cole." "Donna was at the door, so I made Cole get off the toilet and answer it." Does she make him wipe her ass too? Also. PS, you didn't marry a bodybuilder or an ex-biker. Cole is like if Gumby became a real man. Literally no one is impressed or intimidated by your geek ass husband. Grow the fuck up and start fighting your own battles.

This season is becoming very decidedly not "except Chelsea."

[DangerousMinds]

If she didn’t have Cole, she’d just go back to calling Randy all the time to deal with things. Weak.

[Scarlett45]

1 hour ago, DangerousMinds said:

There don’t seem to be any strong, independent, ambitious women in Chelsea’s family. I wonder if Randy would have coddled a son as much as he has Chelsea/

Likely not. I think Randy knew Chelsea wasn’t the brightest bulb and her best bet in life was to marry a decent middle class guy who would let her be a SAHM. Given in the Heternormative framework men don’t have as many options to stay home or be “kept” Randy would’ve pushed his son to get a job. Briana reminds me of a Chelsea type without Chelsea’s advantages  Briana is just NOT bright, and has not committed to using contraception- hence making her problems worse.

1 hour ago, SnarkEnthusiast said:

I think that Aubree's risk factors will also be inevitably exacerbated by the isolation/jealousy from watching Chelsea with her crop of do over kids.

I don’t see this at all. I think Aubree will probably relish in being the oldest AND she and Chelsea will always have a special bond as her very first baby and the years it was just the two of them. I do not think Chelsea has ever resented Aubree. I think Chelsea resents ADAM (for valid reasons) but Aubree will always be her first baby.

Of course I’m only human and I don’t know everything. 

[Christina87]

1 hour ago, SnarkEnthusiast said:

I think that Aubree's risk factors will also be inevitably exacerbated by the isolation/jealousy from watching Chelsea with her crop of do over kids. I wouldn't be surprised if C&C have anywhere from one to three more babies stacked one after the other. Aubree will still be an emotional only child by virtue of age difference when she is in high school, whereas all her siblings will be a little team growing up together. There's bound to be some sadness and resentment there, especially with your siblings and stepdad plastered with loving captions all over Instagram. In contrast, there's years of footage of your mom talking about what a deadbeat piece of shit your dad is and yet groveling every other week for him to take her back before building a new life with her new husband and bragging about having 1 million babies – with you being very painfully aware that you will always be on an island away from that happy, sunny success story. At this point, even though she loves her, Chelsea seems almost inconvenienced by Aubree as a reminder of her shitty pre-Cole life and baggage.

And for the love of God, can this infantile nearly 30-year-old woman do anything without Cole? "So-and-so just sent this, let me tell Cole." "Donna was at the door, so I made Cole get off the toilet and answer it." Does she make him wipe her ass too? Also. PS, you didn't marry a bodybuilder or an ex-biker. Cole is like if Gumby became a real man. Literally no one is impressed or intimidated by your geek ass husband. Grow the fuck up and start fighting your own battles.

This season is becoming very decidedly not "except Chelsea."

I agree with all of this. I also think Chelsea had patented Aubree with a "friend" parenting style, and she is likely going to be more authoritative with the younger kids. I definitely see Chelsea busy with her five toddlers, as Aubree nonchalantly walks in and quietly slips into her room with her boyfriend. I also see Chelsea to be the "don't have sex...promise?" and "ooooooohhhhh, tell me all the details!" type mom, as I suspect Mary was. Remember when Mary lived to hear the gossip about Adam?

Edited March 28, 2019 by Christina87

[TheRealT]

27 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

I agree with all of this. I also think Chelsea had patented Aubree with a "friend" parenting style, and she is likely going to be more authoritative with the younger kids. I definitely see Chelsea busy with her five toddlers, as Aubree nonchalantly walks in and quietly slips into her room with her boyfriend. I also see Chelsea to be the "don't have sex...promise?" and "ooooooohhhhh, tell me all the details!" type mom, as I suspect Mary was. Remember when Mary lived to hear the gossip about Adam?

Yes. Also, as the SAHM of 3+ elementary schoolers and toddlers when Aubree is a teen, Chelsea will be very busy/somewhat isolated and probably enjoy vicariously experiencing the thrills of first crushes on boys, etc. that she can get through being Aubree's BFF. Which sets up a dynamic of Aubree being validated for having "juicy" stories about the boys she likes/is dating, in the context of her mom generally giving far more attention to her (Coley-validated!) younger siblings. Within the context of their general culture being pretty lacking in role models/support for strong, independent, empowered girls/young women (and normalizing constantly asking even young girls, "Do you have a boyfriend? Oh, is so-and-so your boyfriend?") Etc., etc. I don't think it's guaranteed, or even likely, but I wouldn't be surprised if Aubree ended up being a teen mom/having unhealthy relationships with romantic partners/etc.

Though her marriage seems happy, I wouldn't consider Chelsea a woman with a "healthy" outlook on herself, life, and relationships. She'd be a HOT MESS if Cole died or left her (beyond what any happily married, but otherwise well-adjusted, woman would experience). I don't believe for one second that she'd be fine on her own and properly discerning about finding another partner. She'd be very susceptible to ending up with another Adam (though probably a higher-functioning one) who would instantly become NuCole and she'd probably prioritize keeping him happy over her kids (not to a Jenelle level, but still).

[Scarlett45]

49 minutes ago, TheRealT said:

Though her marriage seems happy, I wouldn't consider Chelsea a woman with a "healthy" outlook on herself, life, and relationships. She'd be a HOT MESS if Cole died or left her (beyond what any happily married, but otherwise well-adjusted, woman would experience). I don't believe for one second that she'd be fine on her own and properly discerning about finding another partner. She'd be very susceptible to ending up with another Adam (though probably a higher-functioning one) who would instantly become NuCole and she'd probably prioritize keeping him happy over her kids (not to a Jenelle level, but still).

This I absolutely agree with. Chelsea is a woman who would be up shit creak if she had to live outside of a heteronormative frame work for two hot minutes. Of course I wouldn’t want anyone to be in an abusive relationship or anything like that, but I do think Chelsea is very vulnerable to ending up with another Adam type should Cole die or leave her because she has to be attached to a man. No, not to the extent she would let said man hurt any of the kids (I think she would smile sweetly and poison him if he did that); but in this way she reminds me of Leah (but Chelsea has Randy and all of her kids are healthy, and Chelsea has never had a drug problem). 

I admit it’s hard because women just cannot win- if Chelsea wasn’t interested in a man at all people would criticize her for not giving Aubree a proper father figure, or say she had emotional problems; or there would be constant rumors about her sexual orientation. 

I do really hope Chelsea takes time to develop herself outside of being a mom and wife, or I can see her being depressed in her 40s as her kids don’t need her as much. 

[Christina87]

32 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

This I absolutely agree with. Chelsea is a woman who would be up shit creak if she had to live outside of a heteronormative frame work for two hot minutes. Of course I wouldn’t want anyone to be in an abusive relationship or anything like that, but I do think Chelsea is very vulnerable to ending up with another Adam type should Cole die or leave her because she has to be attached to a man. No, not to the extent she would let said man hurt any of the kids (I think she would smile sweetly and poison him if he did that); but in this way she reminds me of Leah (but Chelsea has Randy and all of her kids are healthy, and Chelsea has never had a drug problem). 

I admit it’s hard because women just cannot win- if Chelsea wasn’t interested in a man at all people would criticize her for not giving Aubree a proper father figure, or say she had emotional problems; or there would be constant rumors about her sexual orientation. 

I do really hope Chelsea takes time to develop herself outside of being a mom and wife, or I can see her being depressed in her 40s as her kids don’t need her as much. 

Absolutely this!!! There is nothing wrong with your primary identity being a wife and mom, but a certain type of woman takes it to extremes. My mom, for instance, worked ten years in advertising before becoming a SAHM, so when we grew up, she was eager to go out there and use her skills to volunteer. She became president of our local woman's club, where she loves using her writing skills to write up all the papers they need to send to the higher ups, as well as newsletters/ ads for the club. She also does that kind of thing at church a lot, and helps serve meals to people having funerals. She also decorates the altar every week at church! It may not sound as exciting as being a CEO, but she isn't emotionally and practically dependent on my dad to the degree that she can't get out and do this stuff, nor does she have to talk to him ten times a day on the phone. Plus, she's a real "girl power" woman, and when we moved my stuff into my first apartment, we did it all ourselves! My dad was working, and my mom was like, "no problem! We can carry this furniture!" 

I just don't see Chelsea being able to do any of this, or having the drive to. I remember learning in psychology that there are two types of women; ones who enjoy accomplishing something (like the move) by themselves and feel proud, and those who feel ashamed that they had to do it alone, even though they accomplished something. My mom and I are definitely in camp #1, but I see Chelsea firmly in camp #2. I could definitely envision her holding herself back from trying things because she wants to wait for a time when coleyyy is there to help. If you do that enough times, you end up putting your whole life on hold! I could imagine her having a pack of 5 kids right together, and being done at 30, but then despairing at 40 when she realizes she could still have kids, but coley can't afford anymore. She realizes another would buy her 18 more years of "mama bear" shirts, and she wouldn't have to adjust her identity. She seems to love babies so much that I'm surprised she's not spacing them out more, because I can definitely see her having a ton, and then wanting more as her fertility window closes. 

[Scarlett45]

3 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

Absolutely this!!! There is nothing wrong with your primary identity being a wife and mom, but a certain type of woman takes it to extremes. My mom, for instance, worked ten years in advertising before becoming a SAHM, so when we grew up, she was eager to go out there and use her skills to volunteer. She became president of our local woman's club, where she loves using her writing skills to write up all the papers they need to send to the higher ups, as well as newsletters/ ads for the club. She also does that kind of thing at church a lot, and helps serve meals to people having funerals. She also decorates the altar every week at church! It may not sound as exciting as being a CEO, but she isn't emotionally and practically dependent on my dad to the degree that she can't get out and do this stuff, nor does she have to talk to him ten times a day on the phone. Plus, she's a real "girl power" woman, and when we moved my stuff into my first apartment, we did it all ourselves! My dad was working, and my mom was like, "no problem! We can carry this furniture!" 

I just don't see Chelsea being able to do any of this, or having the drive to. I remember learning in psychology that there are two types of women; ones who enjoy accomplishing something (like the move) by themselves and feel proud, and those who feel ashamed that they had to do it alone, even though they accomplished something. My mom and I are definitely in camp #1, but I see Chelsea firmly in camp #2. I could definitely envision her holding herself back from trying things because she wants to wait for a time when coleyyy is there to help. If you do that enough times, you end up putting your whole life on hold! I could imagine her having a pack of 5 kids right together, and being done at 30, but then despairing at 40 when she realizes she could still have kids, but coley can't afford anymore. She realizes another would buy her 18 more years of "mama bear" shirts, and she wouldn't have to adjust her identity. She seems to love babies so much that I'm surprised she's not spacing them out more, because I can definitely see her having a ton, and then wanting more as her fertility window closes. 

Yes- Chelsea is certainly the type that would feel ashamed that she had to do things without a guy. She has certainly always expected to be someone’s wife. Now I did believe her when she said she would put on a tuxedo and go to Aubree’s dance if she was still a single Mom (because she loves her daughter); but she would be sad about having to do that. 

Chelsea might want to be done having kids at 30, I could see her and Cole having two more for a total of 5. Aubree is likely to have kids by her mid 20s and Chelsea would be the young grandma who would go to all the events etc and she would have something to do. 

[blubld43]

14 hours ago, SnarkEnthusiast said:

I think that Aubree's risk factors will also be inevitably exacerbated by the isolation/jealousy from watching Chelsea with her crop of do over kids. I wouldn't be surprised if C&C have anywhere from one to three more babies stacked one after the other. Aubree will still be an emotional only child by virtue of age difference when she is in high school, whereas all her siblings will be a little team growing up together. There's bound to be some sadness and resentment there, especially with your siblings and stepdad plastered with loving captions all over Instagram. In contrast, there's years of footage of your mom talking about what a deadbeat piece of shit your dad is and yet groveling every other week for him to take her back before building a new life with her new husband and bragging about having 1 million babies – with you being very painfully aware that you will always be on an island away from that happy, sunny success story. At this point, even though she loves her, Chelsea seems almost inconvenienced by Aubree as a reminder of her shitty pre-Cole life and baggage.

And for the love of God, can this infantile nearly 30-year-old woman do anything without Cole? "So-and-so just sent this, let me tell Cole." "Donna was at the door, so I made Cole get off the toilet and answer it." Does she make him wipe her ass too? Also. PS, you didn't marry a bodybuilder or an ex-biker. Cole is like if Gumby became a real man. Literally no one is impressed or intimidated by your geek ass husband. Grow the fuck up and start fighting your own battles.

This season is becoming very decidedly not "except Chelsea."

Dying laughing at "made Cole get off the toilet"!!

[Lemur]

15 hours ago, TheRealT said:

Though her marriage seems happy, I wouldn't consider Chelsea a woman with a "healthy" outlook on herself, life, and relationships. She'd be a HOT MESS if Cole died or left her (beyond what any happily married, but otherwise well-adjusted, woman would experience). I don't believe for one second that she'd be fine on her own and properly discerning about finding another partner. She'd be very susceptible to ending up with another Adam (though probably a higher-functioning one) who would instantly become NuCole and she'd probably prioritize keeping him happy over her kids (not to a Jenelle level, but still).

Oh, she'd never be on her own.  She'd be back to calling Randy to drop his entire afternoon slate of patients because someone look at her funny in the supermarket.  (Also, that was how many years ago and I'm still agog that not only did she ask her dentist father to come home in the middle of the day and console her because Adam was mean to her.  I get it, you're a kid who just had a kid and you're exhausted and your hormones are just insane so your brain is doing weird shit but in what world is that *ever* okay?)

2 hours ago, blubld43 said:

Dying laughing at "made Cole get off the toilet"!!

I'm nearly pissing myself at the vision of Cole-as-Gumby shuffling off the toilet to go talk to Donna.