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  1. Wow, I've never actually seen a throuple on TV before! I'm super jealous - Miggy has incredible game! It definitely made me want to seriously investigate polyamory dating apps irl haha. Not to nitpick fantastic representation, but I'm not sure why writers are so allergic to the terms bisexuality and pansexuality in 2020 - it's always "I don't like labels," although I'll give it a pass if the actor specifically requested that to honor his real sexuality. I also got a kick out of Angie's apparent eagerness to kiss Poppy. I think that's a common thing when you're coparenting with a blended family. My best friend had a baby at 18 - her daughter is 10 and both parents are married to other people. The father has a toddler as well now. My friend wants to have a baby with her husband, and even though she was obviously super young the first time around, she struggles with the idea of having a huge gap between them and starting all over when her daughter is 12+. But the alternative is being an empty nester at 36 and not having the experience of raising kids with your friends (no one else in our group has had kids yet), so it's a lot to think about. Well, Douglas already has 8 year old (?) twins at his age, so it wouldn't be too outrageous to ask. It's not like all his kids are over 21 and a lot of men dating much younger women happily start over with kids at 55+, much to the chagrin of their adult kids.
  2. I will never be able to take Jack and Estefan's relationship seriously because Estefan is a one-episode gag that turned into not just a recurring character, but a spouse, and I just don't get it. He has no relationship to the group and no actual character traits. So...it's the last season and we devoted the entire A-plot of an episode to a smelly poo crisis? An apt metaphor for the quality of the writing.
  3. Nice tribute to Linda Porter. It feels ballsy to joke/make a subplot about Myrtle not getting into heaven when the actress is actually dead. This must've been a sad episode to film. Felt bad for Dina, but standing up to her dad was an empowering moment for her. Matteo is just dating Amy's brother off screen now? What happened to the unresolved feelings between him and Jeff? So we're apparently getting an Amy/Jonah engagement by the end of the season, I'm guessing. Jonah's way of gently teasing Amy is very endearing...I just wish she didn't have such a stick up her ass with him all the time. Let her be soft, like when they were drinking and giggling after the union deal. Just little moments to show us they're actually in love instead of having her be constantly cold and anal and disapproving towards him.
  4. Again, I FUCKING HATE NICOLE. Poor Sydney - I was actually surprised she was as broken up about it as she was, so apparently she does have actual feelings. Her gagging and eye rolls in the hot tub were gold. Nicole is such a scumbag. I didn’t even recognize Ashley from The Real World, she looks so much older and that season was only in 2013! Going from dating Ari Fitz to Nicole has to be the biggest downgrade in history. And fuck her too for totally pretending Sydney wasn’t even there during their melodramatic hot tub heart to heart. Why do all these girls keep competing with each other over Nicole when clearly their rival is an infinitely better person than Nicole and they could just date each other? It’s like pushing steak out of the way to eagerly shovel garbage into your mouth. Allie proved that Nicole should’ve given her more of a shot because she is an equally terrible person. After days of talking Niall to death for not taking their relationship seriously, she sure threw him under the bus quick to happily grind her ass into Carlos’ boner in front of him. And then throws a hissy fit when Niall is rightfully confused because she lied about shutting Carlos down. So after spending over a week begging for him to show serious emotion and have actual feelings for you, you’re annoyed that he’s jealous?! Fuck off honey. I vote that Niall and Sydney should get together and have the most graphic sex imaginable in front of Allie and Nicole. Marlon and La Demi - eh. Add La Demi to the parade of people fueling Marlon’s God Complex. They forgot to show us the part where both of them decided to only be friends with their exes, who both seemed pretty interested in getting back together with them. La Demi’s ex has been shown so little I don’t even remember his name. This is why we need less Nicole. I’m vaguely interested to see how the apparent crush between La Demi’s ex-boyfriend and Adore plays out (again, when did that happen? Have we ever seen them speak more than two words to each other? This is why the producers need to stop featuring the same five people!)
  5. I went from skeptical of Zach, to smitten with him, to guarded again by the end of the episode. Did not like the post-ceremony selfie, but he seemed sympathetic and good at listening. I agree that I expected him to openly want a blonde gym bunny, so it warmed me to hear him gush over Mindy's looks. And forgive me for sounding like the gullible and lonely 28-year-old that I am, but Christ, he's hot as fuck, to me. I know, I know, I'm such a Katie. But between that smile and the kind eyes and the intense listening, it'd be game over. Mindy also seems like a fundamentally sad person who's desperate for attention. Looks like they're headed the way of Matt/Amber. The whole boning her friend and lying about it thing doesn't really seem like something they can survive. Better her than me! Here's hoping the dick will be worth the emotional trauma. Brandon rebounded slightly for me. He still seems out there and I have a feeling a lot of their marriage will be Taylor pulling teeth. But they did seem much more into each other when he sobered up by the end of the wedding. Discount Ashton continues to bring the charm. He handled Wasted Bridesmaid very tactfully. And while I could've done without the vigorous hand gestures and she definitely puked everywhere 5 minutes after that scene, her trainwreck heart was in the right place - never trust a man who won't go downtown!!! 😉 With that said, he disappointed me in the previews. Katie sucks ass and fights like a 14-year-old, but a man calling his wife a bitch is never a good look. Meka and Michael seem doomed because she's too immature for him (but one of those people who thinks they're hypermature for their age and constantly congratulating themselves for it - the smugness makes it much worse imo) and being incredibly rigid and anal about timelines with a stranger is a recipe for disaster. Austin and Jessica are just awkward enough to work.
  6. Shaun and Carly are exhausting to watch and this episode turned me off to them as a romantic pairing permanently. She's always groveling for scraps of affection and/or taking issue with his autism. If she's always sad or frustrated or horny, she should've taken the opportunity to dump him because they've shown us he's not communicative enough for her a billion times. However, the alternative is absolutely not Lea. Shaun and Lea reminds me of myself and all the pseudo-relationships I thought I was going to have. People like Lea love friendships with disabled people because we fawn all over them with zero effort. They love the attention and validation of having their ego constantly stroked. They might even flirt a little because they get off on the idea that they could have you. And by "flirt a little" to be clear I mean calling you hot, talking about dating you, implying you might have sex, etc. But they will never, ever be attracted to you or interested in a relationship with you - they just think it's fun or amusing or doing you a favor to pretend they are. I thought we already established post-tequila fiasco that Lea had friendzoned Shaun indefinitely, so it's painful and patronizing to Shaun for the writers to act as if one hug suddenly equates to real romantic potential. Lea is an incredibly annoying character who doesn't take Shaun seriously as a person and is kind of ableist for exploiting Shaun for her own entertainment, but I have to hand it to them for the accuracy - I've had and continue to have many Leas in my life. Melendez/Claire...meh. They missed their window for that before Lim/Melendez. I like him better with Lim and having him sleep around with multiple coworkers so close together (didn't his girlfriend before Lim also work at the hospital?) just makes him seem like a horndog.
  7. That was pretty mean of the producers to pick up on Victoria F's insecurities, give her just enough validation to feel seen, and then set her up to lose to Hannah Ann, the one who makes her feel the most inadequate. She looked stunning in that bodysuit though. I refuse to even comment on Champagne gate. Talk about preschool hour. Kelsey was acting like Hannah Ann had intentionally snorted her dead grandmother's ashes or something. Peter is a sleaze, but also patient and empathetic. I would find it irritating and exhausting to comfort so many women sobbing over the tiniest perceived slight or failure. With Kelsey he was awkwardly trying to avoid a total meltdown (again), but he seemed genuinely sincere to Victoria. "You have all of me" might be a line, but it damn sure made me swoon, lol.
  8. Tania. This show has had its fair share of creepy old man, fetishists, gold diggers, narcissists, and fame whores, but I can say with confidence I’ve never hated a participant with the same white hot loathing that I do her. “I’ve been so lenient with you!” I don’t even know this woman and that made my blood boil. I would have absolutely handed her back her ass on a silver platter if she said that to me. What an insufferable, condescending, miserable loser. Syngin is right, she will go through her entire life claiming that no one ever understands her and victimizing herself as a pretext for controlling and demeaning everyone, but he’ll bear the brunt of it. Sure, he’s clearly a deeply damaged, unmotivated man with a Peter Pan complex. I don’t know if I would date him, but that doesn’t make him a bad person and he definitely doesn’t deserve the way she treats him like a servant worshipping at her altar. She also seemed very callous about his time in the mine, which clearly did some permanent psychological damage to him that he desperately needs therapy to process. I love him not giving a shit about her threats. "I'll leave you on the side of the road!" "Sounds pretty good right about now." HA. Eat shit, Tania. This is going to sound weird, but Juliana and Michael’s ex-wife have one of the best, most wholesome relationships we’ve ever seen on the show. I’m hoping all the prenup shenanigans and fake parenting showdown was producer driven. I love when they were both in the car shit talking Michael. Sarah was so earnestly listening to Juliana when she was opening up about all the terrible things she’s had to go through. She actually respects Juliana and cares about her as a person instead of writing her off as an empty sugar baby or a kid. The scene between them in the bridal shop was very cute and they seem to have a great mutual friendship and understanding. Regardless of what happens between Juliana and Michael, I hope she and Sarah stay friends. It will drive Michael up the wall if nothing else. Natalie is a gaslighting manipulator. “I threw my ring at him and he was supposed to put it back on me but he didn’t!“ So to be clear, you breaking off the engagement is a sign that HE doesn’t care? Huh? I’m sure she was being passive aggressive about saying she loved him in the interview because he had said or done something to piss her off the night before. It’s never ending with her, and she always has that vindictive deer in the headlights look. She’s beyond obnoxious. Mike needs to get out while he still can. Watching Mursel and Anna break up 45 times was like watching high schoolers do poorly acted theater. What was up with all the kneeling and wailing?
  9. She serves no other purpose than to be an empty roadblock to delay Will/Angie inevitably getting together. That's it. The reason she sucks and their relationship feels like nothing is because the writers never bother fleshing out the romantic false lead beyond using them to briefly guilt trip the single one (Angie) for realizing they have feelings for someone in a relationship and causing a temporary rift. Every sitcom does this with their main romance to the point where I'm wondering if the same writers write every show. Friendship first season, one dates someone else first half of season 2, they realize they have feelings for each other and hook up sometime in the second half, dating by season 3. As a hopeless romantic, I usually can't get enough of the fake dating trope, but Will/Angie kind of fell flat for me, maybe because Taran/Leighton have a really strong best friend chemistry, but I don't really buy the romantic tension between them and it feels like a case where they feel like the leads have to date for the sake of it. Comparable sitcom romances like Nick/Jess on New Girl and Jake/Amy on Brooklyn Nine Nine had genuine moments of dramatic and believable sexual tension within the general campiness of the usual show, and Nick and Jake were also goofy dudes. Time will tell I guess. That's usually how shows do it with the alpha and beta couple - the secondary couple gets together first and then breaks up as the primary couple finally ends will they/won't they. With that said, I hope not because they've already said they're in love and revealed their relationship to their kids, plus they had the heart attack drama at the beginning of the season. I hope the writers will leave them alone.
  10. Nice seeing Demi Lovato out there doing acting again! She's struggled terribly with addiction the past few years and has been in and out of rehab, so her line about being clean made me wince. It feels like every episode is so random - Will gets a surrogate! AnnieCon! Karen fucks a random war vet! - and it does make me scratch my head for how they're going to end the series.
  11. That's my main problem with this season - it feels like a less interesting recast and recycle of everything but Penn.
  12. This past episode was the most boring one yet. Nothing happened. Sure, Magdalina is definitely out of Ryan’s league, but I don’t understand why that was so shocking to everyone given that 90% of Instagram models date the blandest white men imaginable. Ryan is the most uninteresting person on the show. All that dramatic hoopla about Laurel’s “return” when they just used her to film one video announcement. Yawn. I surprisingly felt bad for Daniel going home. I wish they had voted Allie out instead. I don’t understand Daniel as a person and I especially don’t understand his head scratching career choice to spend all his time going on multiple dating shows when I’ve never seen a more awkward person care so little about hook up culture and yet be repeatedly cast to float like an asexual log in a sea of horny sexpots. Does he just not want to go back to his job or something? I guess I can understand why he was originally cast for having a good body by conventional definition, but what about him continues to be so appealing to casting agencies whose sole purpose is to find people that other people would want to have sex with? Allie is clingy and over dramatic and ruining her chances of turning a fun fling into something more. Callum and Georgia are on the same co-dependent teen frequency, so their relationship works. Allie wants a title after a few days and Niall just wants to get it in. He’s always been honest about what he wants and I don’t think he’s leading her on, she’s just being desperate. They should’ve sent her home while they had the chance. Niall confiding in Callum and Georgia before giving them an awkward three-way hug was hilarious. He doesn’t give a shit about any of their drama or Romeo and Juliet bullshit or his past relationship with Georgia and I love it. He’s easily my favorite person in the house.
  13. My overall take away from this episode was that five couples is probably too many. I had totally forgotten about the other two by the end and neither of them really seem that interesting to me so far. I’m honestly kind of annoyed that we have to waste another episode pretending that one of them might run away and general ceremony awkwardness. I don’t understand Meka’s breakdown about her dress being too big- it looks fine and if you were worried about cleavage, you shouldn’t have gone with the strapless dress! Austin’s stock went way up for me this episode. He was damn charming. I gained a lot of respect for Jessica too. When the camera pointedly zoomed in on Austin’s baby face and blond hair when she was describing her type of guy (which ironically sounded exactly like Derek) I was bracing for a full on Jamie style meltdown. I was pleasantly surprised that she seemed totally unfazed that he wasn’t physically her type normally and was instead super attracted to his kindness and sense of humor as the night went on. Actual maturity, who would’ve thought! Although this show keeps producing weirdly codependent identical twins that have inferiority complexes about their sisters accomplishments, so I guess I will reserve my opinion until we see how that plays out. On the opposite side of the spectrum, my opinion of Brandon totally took a nosedive. I don’t know if it was because he accidentally got too drunk before the ceremony (warning your new wife you reek of hard liquor is never promising, let alone a good first impression) or he collapsed under the anxiety of the day, but he gave off corny fuckboy vibes the whole episode. His interactions with Taylor were painful and sounded like an older sister trying to pry information out of her detached little brother. And she’s six years younger than him! That was just embarrassing. He seems like kind of a stick in the mud and she’s too type A for him. I already think they’re doomed because she’ll get bored of mothering him. Katie continues to be immature and annoying as fuck. So she basically doesn’t regret ditching tinder dude because Derek turned out to be hot. She also talks like a 15-year-old “he’s super cute and we’re like, holding hands!” Bleh. I thought it was a weird choice by her family to drop the diabetes bombshell in a cutesy line about her being bitchy but he doesn’t seem bothered by it so whatever. I want Derek for myself. I wonder how he will react when tinder dude inevitably comes up in conversation. ETA: I had totally forgotten about Brandon's bizarre homophobic/transphobic rambling about being glad Taylor "wasn't a dude" and then high-fiving Taylor when she confirmed she doesn't have a penis...yikes...why would you even bring that up? What a juvenile, insecure loser.
  14. La Demi is right - what is this, the Callum and Georgia show? Their collective past and all their drama is exhausting. How does Georgia even have such an extensive, explosive dating history at 21?! I have mixed. complex feelings about La Demi and Callum's friendship in particular. On one hand, talk about hidden depths and he is very sweet to her. But on the other hand, both Georgia and especially Callum's relationship with her feels a bit patronizing. I'm disabled and from personal experience, trans and disabled people have a lot in common when it comes to dating. Either people are flat out repulsed by you or they're fetishists but mostly you're constantly starved for any affection whatsoever. And over time you wind up with well-intentioned "friends" who, whether they pity you or want you to be a learning experience for them or want to congratulate themselves on how open-minded they are. wind up stringing you along and ultimately really hurting you because they provide all these moments of emotional intimacy with zero chance of reciprocating anything. I've gotten the whole "You're so smart and beautiful and such an amazing person and anyone would be lucky to have you [but oh god, anyone but me]" monologue dozens of times. Doing cutesy things like wearing her necklace only amplifies his mixed signals. Frankly I just think people enjoy dating levels of adoration from someone they not only don't have to date, but get automatic praise from for basic kindness, both directly from us and from people patting them on the back. "I'm an example that straight guys CAN accept and love her!!!" Sure, but you know you don't love her like that and that's what she's pining for, so maybe ease off the kudos a bit. La Demi isn't a helpless wounded baby deer. Callum and Georgia are being condescending by claiming to be protecting her from Sam because she's "vulnerable" (read: trans and therefore not attractive to the mainstream...thanks guys). You don't give a shit about La Demi, you just hate Sam. Stop pissing all over her like she's your property and let her get some mediocre dick. She's an adult who can make that mistake on her own. Oh Niall! At least you're getting exactly what it says on the tin with him. He seems like he would be an immature pain in the ass to date, but a fun ex to have, precisely because he's not a serious emotional dude and doesn't seem bothered by heavier stuff like drama and betrayal, which is why he's the only one of Georgia exs who has a positive relationship with her. I'd rather watch more of Sydney trying to seduce Daniel than watch the ego black hole that's Nicole get any more attention. It's peak Nicole to call Sydney wife goals and then in the same breath basically admit she'd drop her in a second for Ashley. We'll see if Sydney goes full Laurel when Ashley shows up. Probably not though, because she's weirdly emotionally detached like Daniel.
  15. Yes! You would think she would have more self-awareness and social awareness than to be angsting over an obvious Tinder douche like an insecure 16-year-old. Despite the show's narrative for her, you're not ready for marriage if you signed up to a reality show in a half-assed attempt to make your non-committing booty call jealous. Katie also gives off strong alcoholic vibes, even though that's probably not the case with her diabetes. Between Austin and Walmart Ashton especially (Derek), it's going to be a distracting season. I feel Austin's pain - I'm 28 but look 18 because I'm thin and short with adult acne, lol. Derek's actually pretty hot, as are Brandon and Taylor.
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