S09.E09: Where Do We Go From Here

[druzy]

Cheyenne shocks Cory with her pregnancy news. Amber struggles when her dog’s health deteriorates and Catelynn and Tyler are concerned that Nova might have a learning disability. Mackenzie celebrates her 26th birthday.

Airs March 23, 2021

[Chris Knight]

Cheyenne,  I don't think Corey cares - at least not the way you want - about your pg. His talk with New Boyfriend was very nice and supportive. 

I remain the sole Team Ryan member. It's lonely on this team, lol. Maci and Taylor have such ridiculously high opinions of themselves, and the way MTV turns the story against Ryan is very bad. I get that Ryan was/is an addict but I still think the Bentley story is 95% Maci-driven.

Maci's shooting probably was frightening. Glad she was not hurt.

As a new pet owner, I dread someday burying a pet. Still, Amber babbling on and on about being a damn good Mom ! was positively ludicrous. Has she even uttered her son's name in the last few months  ? Amber's life is all about Amber, very little concern for Leah, and nothing for James. 

[Quilty]

Well there ya go Gary. You let Leah find out on her own that her mother is a pos. Amber can't blame him for any of it. Good job Garbear👏🏻.

[A-Lo]

Isn't Mac just the luckiest girl?  Married to that ambitious, hunky Ryan and having in-laws that seem to be at her house 24/7 who are obsessed with Ryan's ex?  And the whole world gets to see just what wonderful choices she's made! I wonder how long it's going to take for the regrets to set in.  Maybe when the MTV money dries up?

[Liamsmom617]

Yeah, I keep saying I feel a little bit of sympathy for Mac, but at this point...nah. She will more than likely leave Ryan as soon as that sweet "Teen Mom OG" $$$ stops rolling in. She tries so hard to portray this happy, loving family on IG but the footage we see on these episodes tells a very different tale.

[MargeGunderson]

11 hours ago, Quilty said:

Well there ya go Gary. You let Leah find out on her own that her mother is a pos. Amber can't blame him for any of it. Good job Garbear👏🏻.

I’d like to think this was Gary’s plan all along. Amber was always going to put Leah last, and it was really only a matter of time before Leah came to that conclusion herself.

[BrownBear2012]

18 hours ago, Chris Knight said:

Cheyenne,  I don't think Corey cares - at least not the way you want - about your pg. His talk with New Boyfriend was very nice and supportive. 

I remain the sole Team Ryan member. It's lonely on this team, lol. Maci and Taylor have such ridiculously high opinions of themselves, and the way MTV turns the story against Ryan is very bad. I get that Ryan was/is an addict but I still think the Bentley story is 95% Maci-driven.

Maci's shooting probably was frightening. Glad she was not hurt.

As a new pet owner, I dread someday burying a pet. Still, Amber babbling on and on about being a damn good Mom ! was positively ludicrous. Has she even uttered her son's name in the last few months  ? Amber's life is all about Amber, very little concern for Leah, and nothing for James. 

"Team" Ryan??? What's to cheer about with this guy? MTV just sets up a camera...Ryan's behavior speaks for itself. The "Bentley" story as to where it concerns Ryan is simple...Ryan treats his first born son like crap. Mocks him in public, mocks him private, trashes his mother on TV, never attends any of Bentley's activities and spends zero one on one time with him. And I'm not even including Ryan's susbstance abuse issues...I really see nothing to cheer about with someone who has basically abandoned his son and makes ZERO attempts to reconcile or have one on one time with him. Here's a thought...how about taking your son out for a burger and fries and having some very much needed one on one time with your kid...ask him about his life, apologize for your behavior and show him you actually care. Is that so hard to do? Instead of bitching about his mother and her husband, who are actually actively engaged in raising him. Are they flawed? Yes...but they try. Ryan isn't trying...he's allowed his parents to be the active participants in Bentley's life while he was out drinking, getting high on heroin and other stuff. Now is the time to step up and be a man. Admit your shortcomings and co-parent like an adult instead of an adolescent asshole. Even if it means quitting MTV...nothing is more important as a parent then having a good, healthy relationship with your child. It might mean Ryan would actually have to go get a job and actually be a productive member of society. He's the product of weak, codependent parenting...it's not all his fault. But now is the time to reverse course and do the right things by Bentley and his other kids. And Larry and Jen need to stop enabling him and condoning his immature and selfish behavior.

Edited March 24, 2021 by BrownBear2012

[MargeGunderson]

Absolutely agree @BrownBear2012. Ryan’s parents and Mac do nothing but enable him and blame everything on Maci. I guess it’s a lot easier to do that than admit that you raised/married a selfish man child loser. 

[Mothra]

6 minutes ago, BrownBear2012 said:

"Team" Ryan??? What's to cheer about with this guy? MTV just sets up a camera...Ryan's behavior speaks for itself. The "Bentley" story as to where it concerns Ryan is simple...Ryan treats his first born son like crap. Mocks him in public, mocks him private, trashes his mother on TV, never attends any of Bentley's activities and spends zero one on one time with him. And I'm not even including Ryan's susbstance abuse issues...I really see nothing to cheer about with someone who has basically abandoned his son and makes ZERO attempts to reconcile or have one on one time with him. Here's a thought...how about taking your son out for a burger and fries and having some very much needed one on one time with your kid...ask him about his life, apologize for your behavior and show him you actually care. Is that so hard to do? Instead of bitching about his mother and her husband, who are actually actively engaged in raising him. Are they flawed? Yes...but they try. Ryan isn't trying...he's allowed his parents to be the active participants in Bentley's life while he was out drinking, getting high on heroin and other stuff. Now is the time to step up and be a man. Admit your shortcomings and co-parent like an adult instead of an adolescent asshole. Even if it means quitting MTV...nothing is more important as a parent then having a good, healthy relationship with your child. It might mean Ryan would actually have to go get a job and actually be a productive member of society. He's the product of weak, codependent parenting...it's not all his fault. But now is the time to reverse course and do the right things by Bentley and his other kids. And Larry and Jen need to stop enabling him and condoning his immature and selfish behavior.

Ryan needn't even apologize to Bentley or try to make conversation.  At this point, he needs simply to show up somewhere Bentley has asked him to.  I understand that it would be very difficult for Ryan to plunge into psychotherapy with his son right off the bat, but we've seen Bentley look for Ryan at his sports events, and Ryan never showed up.  That would be such an easy way to start to try to heal this relationship--just show up for something.  He doesn't have to wave or anything (although that would be nice) but just be there to watch your son compete.  It's not that big a deal, and god knows Ryan has plenty of free time.  And then keep showing up until Bentley makes a move toward him.  It will take a while, but it would be so worth it.

And don't show up with your parents, Ryan, you dumbass.  Or your wife.  You're the one Bentley needs to have a relationship with.

[pinkandsparkly13]

But people, including little Leah need to understand Amber's trauma. It's totally not her fault that she's been a bad mother. Which she definitely isn't of course 🙄 lol 

[BrownBear2012]

38 minutes ago, pinkandsparkly13 said:

But people, including little Leah need to understand Amber's trauma. It's totally not her fault that she's been a bad mother. Which she definitely isn't of course 🙄 lol 

Don’t forget, her “mental illnesses “...

[BrownBear2012]

40 minutes ago, Mothra said:

Ryan needn't even apologize to Bentley or try to make conversation.  At this point, he needs simply to show up somewhere Bentley has asked him to.  I understand that it would be very difficult for Ryan to plunge into psychotherapy with his son right off the bat, but we've seen Bentley look for Ryan at his sports events, and Ryan never showed up.  That would be such an easy way to start to try to heal this relationship--just show up for something.  He doesn't have to wave or anything (although that would be nice) but just be there to watch your son compete.  It's not that big a deal, and god knows Ryan has plenty of free time.  And then keep showing up until Bentley makes a move toward him.  It will take a while, but it would be so worth it.

And don't show up with your parents, Ryan, you dumbass.  Or your wife.  You're the one Bentley needs to have a relationship with.

Part of being in a long term outpatient recovery program, which I’m guessing Ryan isn’t in, is owning your mistakes and apologizing for them to the people who were affected by them. Ryan could or should have carved out some time with Bentley to just say “I screwed up...I’m going to do better and if I did or said things that were hurtful, I’m sorry.” That’s all he had to do...own your shit and work on yourself and your relationship with your kid. Go to one of his sporting  events...make contact with him on a regular basis, take him to lunch and actually talk to him. Leave your coddling parents out of it. Man up and make it right. In six years Bentley will be 18 and adult in the eyes of the law. He won’t be required to have a relationship with Ryan. Is this how he wants this to go? Complete abandonment emotionally and physically?  If so, then Ryan has abdicated his parental responsibilities and Taylor should move to formally adopt him.

[Andyourlittledog2]

IIIIImemememeIIIIImemememegoodmomgreatmomgreatmomgreatmom....

Good gawd Amber is awful. A person who was trying to be a good mom would not simply insist that she already is one and that if her kid doesn't know that then that's on her. She seemed annoyed that Leah was growing up and seeing her for who she really is -- a shitty mom.  Amber's mom's silence to all of this delusional narcissistic thinking spoke volumes. Amber is not redeemable so don't waste your breath. Amber takes no responsibility for anything at all. She is all about herself.

And her letting that poor dog languish at the end of his life like that was terrible. She kept it alive just because she needed him and gave no thought to what the dog actually needed. It was awful watching that poor dog suffer at the end like that. But Amber sees nothing but herself and her needs and desires when she looks around her. 

Thank god for Gary. That's something I did not think I would be saying ten years ago.

Cate and Tyler I think are trying really hard but have difficulty based on their own shitty upbringing. I felt for Tyler being so worried about Nova's scores. The subtle and not so subtle panic was something I totally can relate to, although it worked out fine for my kid. As a parent it is excruciating when you see a problem and don't know how to fix it or if it can be fixed, especially if it dredges up your own painful past. He's trying though so I give him props.

Mackenzie lost me with a return to Ode to My Dead Mother. I am so sick of it. I can just see it:

"Oh! Scrambled eggs! Mom loved scrambled eggs. Hey kids, let's eat these scrambled eggs in memory of your dead grandma. She would love that." 

If she can't stop it then at least stop filming it and subjecting us to it. The other week when she phoned her dead mother to tell her all about her trip to Florida and asked the kids to join her I had a very weird vibe about the whole thing. Poor kids. I mean, it's nuts, right?

Sorry about the shooting. I ff through Maci as I can't stand her but I did feel for her there. If she suddenly turns it into a lecture tour on surviving gas station shootings she will lose me though.

Cheyenne.  Why is she here again?

[PicnicLife77]

Amber: Her phone still says Gary the Fairy. The "damn good mom" speech was so irritating and delusional. She seemed high on the phone with her mom. 

Gary: He really did seem a lot more concerned about Amber than he should be. I think he's a great parent, but it was odd that the conversation about the dog was really about how bad they should feel for Amber. He even started crying. Leah wasn't half as upset. 

C&T: We've been talking about this for years, but I'll never get over how odd the communication style is between Tyler and his mom, and therefore now Tyler and everybody. And I like Kim, but they just yell and talk over one another, and you can't tell what's a question and what's a statement. 

 

[teapot]

8 hours ago, pinkandsparkly13 said:

But people, including little Leah need to understand Amber's trauma. It's totally not her fault that she's been a bad mother. Which she definitely isn't of course 🙄 lol 

I’m sorry, did you not hear her?  She’s a GREAT mom!
 

also, Miss Maddie is a *queen*, wagging her tail all the way!  Class act right there!!!

Edited March 25, 2021 by teapot

[Inga]

Wow! Leah telling it like it is !!! She knows exactly what is up! She straight up said, when i go there, she just sleeps all day!!!

Amber is so delusional. She just kept repeating, I’m a good mom, over and over again? Like is she trying to convince herself? When she says stuff like that, why isn’t anyone saying , if you’re such a good mom, why don’t you have custody of either of your kids???  All these people around her just appeasing her, like Gary and that therapist, aren’t doing her any favors. Why can’t anyone really call her out on anything? Like ask her what has she actually done for Leah? When she comes over, what do u guys do? I know Gary just wants to keep the mtv money going, so he will never cross her. But it’s like Amber, have plans for when Leah comes over. Play games, go out for ice cream, do crafts together. Make Leah actually want to come over! It’s not hard! You’re not even trying. I’m so glad Leah is finally speaking out. There may be hope for her yet. 

[BrownBear2012]

4 hours ago, Andyourlittledog2 said:

IIIIImemememeIIIIImemememegoodmomgreatmomgreatmomgreatmom....

Good gawd Amber is awful. A person who was trying to be a good mom would not simply insist that she already is one and that if her kid doesn't know that then that's on her. She seemed annoyed that Leah was growing up and seeing her for who she really is -- a shitty mom.  Amber's mom's silence to all of this delusional narcissistic thinking spoke volumes. Amber is not redeemable so don't waste your breath. Amber takes no responsibility for anything at all. She is all about herself.

And her letting that poor dog languish at the end of his life like that was terrible. She kept it alive just because she needed him and gave no thought to what the dog actually needed. It was awful watching that poor dog suffer at the end like that. But Amber sees nothing but herself and her needs and desires when she looks around her. 

Thank god for Gary. That's something I did not think I would be saying ten years ago.

Cate and Tyler I think are trying really hard but have difficulty based on their own shitty upbringing. I felt for Tyler being so worried about Nova's scores. The subtle and not so subtle panic was something I totally can relate to, although it worked out fine for my kid. As a parent it is excruciating when you see a problem and don't know how to fix it or if it can be fixed, especially if it dredges up your own painful past. He's trying though so I give him props.

Mackenzie lost me with a return to Ode to My Dead Mother. I am so sick of it. I can just see it:

"Oh! Scrambled eggs! Mom loved scrambled eggs. Hey kids, let's eat these scrambled eggs in memory of your dead grandma. She would love that." 

If she can't stop it then at least stop filming it and subjecting us to it. The other week when she phoned her dead mother to tell her all about her trip to Florida and asked the kids to join her I had a very weird vibe about the whole thing. Poor kids. I mean, it's nuts, right?

Sorry about the shooting. I ff through Maci as I can't stand her but I did feel for her there. If she suddenly turns it into a lecture tour on surviving gas station shootings she will lose me though.

Cheyenne.  Why is she here again?

It was appalling to see and hear Amber repeat over and over again what a good mom she is...taking your daughter out for mani's and pedi's isn't being a good mom. Having your daughter over and sleeping the whole time isn't "being there" for her. Dumping your daughter for another live in loser boyfriend isn't being a good mom. She's not even a so-so mom...she's just a lousy mom who thinks only of herself. I was impressed with Leah's maturity and ability to recognize what a failure Amber has been as a mother. I did notice a look of sadness about her when discussing Amber...a sense of loss of something she's never really had from Amber. I was also glad to hear her praise Christina for being her real mother. I'm glad she's had a good female role model and loving person in her life that she can depend on and go to with anything that she may need to talk about. And you are so right about how Amber mistreated that poor dog by keeping him alive when it was clear he was in pain and suffering. That was hard to watch.

Mac is just weird...from the way she talks to the obsession with reminding her poor kids, who look like they have PTSD, about their dead grandmother. The daughter seems depressed and the thumb sucking at her age seems like a self soothing thing with her. These kids have had a lot of upheaval and dysfunction in their young lives and it shows. 

[BrownBear2012]

46 minutes ago, Inga said:

Wow! Leah telling it like it is !!! She knows exactly what is up! She straight up said, when i go there, she just sleeps all day!!!

Amber is so delusional. She just kept repeating, I’m a good mom, over and over again? Like is she trying to convince herself? When she says stuff like that, why isn’t anyone saying , if you’re such a good mom, why don’t you have custody of either of your kids???  All these people around her just appeasing her, like Gary and that therapist, aren’t doing her any favors. Why can’t anyone really call her out on anything? Like ask her what has she actually done for Leah? When she comes over, what do u guys do? I know Gary just wants to keep the mtv money going, so he will never cross her. But it’s like Amber, have plans for when Leah comes over. Play games, go out for ice cream, do crafts together. Make Leah actually want to come over! It’s not hard! You’re not even trying. I’m so glad Leah is finally speaking out. There may be hope for her yet. 

This what people with BPD do...if you stand up to them or offer up advice or try to discuss something that they may see as negative, they become angry and in Amber's case, violent. Her mother placates her because she knows Amber is a physically abusive person. Gary has experienced that also...that's why he placates her. Leah knows it too but hasn't been a target for physical or verbal abuse...yet. She probably goes to therapy sporadically...I don't see her going on a regular basis...it would interfere with couch potato life style.

Edited March 25, 2021 by BrownBear2012

[kitkat343]

I was a unhappy to see Gary tell Leah that their relationship "was a two way street" when Leah talked about her mom sleeping all the time during her visits and not spending time with her in general.  Its good that Gary doesn't say anything bad about Amber to Leah, but when she quite accurately described her relationship with her mom and why she's upset she needs to know Gary and Christina are 100% on her side.  And he's hurting Leah by making it feel like its her responsibility to fix the relationship with her mom.  So many children of abusive parents lose themselves in trying to keep their parents happy and earn their love.  

Gary should never say anything bad about Amber, but he can just validate Leah's feelings when she says the truth about her mother.  If Leah says, "she's never around," Gary can say, "I'm really sorry about that.  That must be so hard."   Leah isn't a little girl anymore.  She knows exactly who her mother is, and any judge determining visitation and custody would take into account her wishes at this point.  If Gary is still catering to Amber's delusions, that's either because he genuinely wants to help her or he wants to maintain a good relationship with her to keep the MTV Teen Mom gravy train rolling.  I hope he meets with a  child psychologist to get a sense of how to help Leah navigate this very difficult relationship.   And no that doesn't include that brain dead quack Dr. Drew!   

Edited March 25, 2021 by kitkat343

[PicnicLife77]

2 hours ago, kitkat343 said:

I was a unhappy to see Gary tell Leah that their relationship "was a two way street" when Leah talked about her mom sleeping all the time during her visits and not spending time with her in general.  Its good that Gary doesn't say anything bad about Amber to Leah, but when she quite accurately described her relationship with her mom and why she's upset she needs to know Gary and Christina are 100% on her side.  And he's hurting Leah by making it feel like its her responsibility to fix the relationship with her mom.  So many children of abusive parents lose themselves in trying to keep their parents happy and earn their love.  

Gary should never say anything bad about Amber, but he can just validate Leah's feelings when she says the truth about her mother.  If Leah says, "she's never around," Gary can say, "I'm really sorry about that.  That must be so hard."   Leah isn't a little girl anymore.  She knows exactly who her mother is, and any judge determining visitation and custody would take into account her wishes at this point.  If Gary is still catering to Amber's delusions, that's either because he genuinely wants to help her or he wants to maintain a good relationship with her to keep the MTV Teen Mom gravy train rolling.  I hope he meets with a  child psychologist to get a sense of how to help Leah navigate this very difficult relationship.   And no that doesn't include that brain dead quack Dr. Drew!   

Well ... I mean, he's not wrong. As much as I despise Amber and want Leah to feel heard, I do think it's important to gently discourage bitterness. 

Here's where I'm coming from: In my family we have a teen family member whose mom hasn't always made her feel wanted, kind of like Amber, and everyone of course is on the child's side. At the same time, beginning when she was about Leah's age, I watched adults egg on her comments about her mother to the point where even at age 12 or so she would hang up on her mom, give her lots of attitude and say horrid things about her when around others, and all the adults thought it was funny. Talking crap about her mom became a sport in itself for her, yet when she saw her in person she acted differently. 

It's never on the child to mend the relationship or keep things bottled up, but in the case I'm speaking about, so many people fed into this in the name of letting her vent and validating her that I truly believe by Leah's age she no longer saw relationships as two way streets, and I already see her cutting people out of her life left and right because everybody is "toxic". So she chooses not to answer the phone for family whenever she doesn't want to, runs away for short spurts, tells other people she is being abused, etc. If you look at her wrong. I just don't want Leah to grow up with that unbalanced mentality. 

[PicnicLife77]

10 hours ago, BrownBear2012 said:

Mac is just weird...from the way she talks to the obsession with reminding her poor kids, who look like they have PTSD, about their dead grandmother. The daughter seems depressed and the thumb sucking at her age seems like a self soothing thing with her. These kids have had a lot of upheaval and dysfunction in their young lives and it shows. 

I'm okay with her mom's death being a big deal to her. I'm 10 yrs older than she is, and my parents are elderly, and I'm absolutely going to lose my mind and see the entire world differently when either of them passes. At her age and her mother's age it would hit me very hard. 

[Mothra]

18 hours ago, BrownBear2012 said:

Part of being in a long term outpatient recovery program, which I’m guessing Ryan isn’t in, is owning your mistakes and apologizing for them to the people who were affected by them. Ryan could or should have carved out some time with Bentley to just say “I screwed up...I’m going to do better and if I did or said things that were hurtful, I’m sorry.” That’s all he had to do...own your shit and work on yourself and your relationship with your kid. Go to one of his sporting  events...make contact with him on a regular basis, take him to lunch and actually talk to him. Leave your coddling parents out of it. Man up and make it right. In six years Bentley will be 18 and adult in the eyes of the law. He won’t be required to have a relationship with Ryan. Is this how he wants this to go? Complete abandonment emotionally and physically?  If so, then Ryan has abdicated his parental responsibilities and Taylor should move to formally adopt him.

Ideally, yes, Ryan should try to make amends with Bentley, but I'm suggesting that there is an easier way to open a relationship with his son that involves practically *zero* effort on Ryan's part, and he is still unwilling (or unable?) to take even the tiniest step to show his son he has any interest in him at all.  Ryan bitches and moans about how mean Maci is to him, keeping Bentley away, etc., and his enabling--your word is better, "coddling"--parents are right there encouraging this behavior.  Why can't Jen or Larry push Ryan to just *show up* once in a while for Ryan?  Christ on a cracker, he wouldn't even have to stay for the whole game!  Are they truly unable to understand that to Bentley (and to those of us watching), Ryan has exactly no shits to give about Bentley?  And this is Maci's fault?  Are they really this delusional?  Are they all on crack?

[FozzyBear]

1 hour ago, Mothra said:

Ideally, yes, Ryan should try to make amends with Bentley, but I'm suggesting that there is an easier way to open a relationship with his son that involves practically *zero* effort on Ryan's part, and he is still unwilling (or unable?) to take even the tiniest step to show his son he has any interest in him at all.  Ryan bitches and moans about how mean Maci is to him, keeping Bentley away, etc., and his enabling--your word is better, "coddling"--parents are right there encouraging this behavior.  Why can't Jen or Larry push Ryan to just *show up* once in a while for Ryan?  Christ on a cracker, he wouldn't even have to stay for the whole game!  Are they truly unable to understand that to Bentley (and to those of us watching), Ryan has exactly no shits to give about Bentley?  And this is Maci's fault?  Are they really this delusional?  Are they all on crack?

Well these are the same people who asked why Maci’s parents didn’t put her on birth control instead of asking Ryan why he didn’t use protection, so...

[BrownBear2012]

3 hours ago, abracadabra said:

I'm okay with her mom's death being a big deal to her. I'm 10 yrs older than she is, and my parents are elderly, and I'm absolutely going to lose my mind and see the entire world differently when either of them passes. At her age and her mother's age it would hit me very hard. 

I get that...I've lost both of my parents. The problem I have is that her loss and grieving needs to be dealt with in a theraputic environment. She's clearly upsetting her children when she makes calls to her mother's phone and leaves messages in front of the kids. They all were visibly quiet, withdrawn and sad during and after that. If she needs to do that, she should do it in private. I think she really needs to do some grievance counseling. Her kids have been through enough in their short lives...loss of family, loss of their grandmother, serious illness with their grandfather, parents that fight and break up with some regularity...it's alot for little kids. 

[BrownBear2012]

2 hours ago, Mothra said:

Ideally, yes, Ryan should try to make amends with Bentley, but I'm suggesting that there is an easier way to open a relationship with his son that involves practically *zero* effort on Ryan's part, and he is still unwilling (or unable?) to take even the tiniest step to show his son he has any interest in him at all.  Ryan bitches and moans about how mean Maci is to him, keeping Bentley away, etc., and his enabling--your word is better, "coddling"--parents are right there encouraging this behavior.  Why can't Jen or Larry push Ryan to just *show up* once in a while for Ryan?  Christ on a cracker, he wouldn't even have to stay for the whole game!  Are they truly unable to understand that to Bentley (and to those of us watching), Ryan has exactly no shits to give about Bentley?  And this is Maci's fault?  Are they really this delusional?  Are they all on crack?

I think his parents don't push back because everytime they have Ryan has a major explosion and they are afraid that this will cause him to use again...Jen even said, at the beginning of the season, that she and Larry feel that they "trigger" him into using. That's why they don't push him or ever disagree now with his constant bashing of Maci. This is called codependency. They have thrown in the flag and completely surrendered to his obsessive need to rationalize his non relationship with Bentley as only evil Maci's fault. There is a lot of psychopathy in this family. They all need therapy.

[Mothra]

20 hours ago, Andyourlittledog2 said:

Mackenzie lost me with a return to Ode to My Dead Mother. I am so sick of it. I can just see it:

"Oh! Scrambled eggs! Mom loved scrambled eggs. Hey kids, let's eat these scrambled eggs in memory of your dead grandma. She would love that." 

If she can't stop it then at least stop filming it and subjecting us to it. The other week when she phoned her dead mother to tell her all about her trip to Florida and asked the kids to join her I had a very weird vibe about the whole thing. Poor kids. I mean, it's nuts, right?

Mackenzie misses her mother, and it's certainly understandable, but I agree that she's carrying her public not mourning exactly but *memorializing* her mom to a weird extent.  I think even her children think she's a little bit crazy; I think she needs some kind of professional grief counseling so she can move on at least to the point where her mother's memory doesn't intrude on every single thing that happens in her life.  I wonder what the effect is on her children and their understanding of how to deal with loss.

Her "phone call" to her mother reminded me of a true story that was in the New Yorker some years ago, about a man who set up a non-functioning telephone booth in a field and put up a sign that people could use it to talk to their beloved dead ones.  Many people did, and achieved great relief and peace by doing so.  It was really a lovely story, and not as crazy as it sounds.  Mackenzie, otoh ....

[IDreamofJoaquin]

Amber is sooooooo gross.  What has she done to be a "damn good mom".   Honestly, she will only continue to fuck Leah up more because she is already starting to blame her for being distant.  

I was sickened by Mackenzie saying that they were unhappy because she was unhappy.   Does this guy have a huge dick or something?  Because he has the most bland personality I can't imagine the draw to him.   When she was asking him for the word she was trying to use I was thinking "he uses about 100 words so he won't know".   Her birthday was fucking boring.  He put zero effort into it.   Are those really her favorite flowers or does he just know that poem that says those two kinds of flowers?  Why drag them to the beach?   Then you just have to carry them back with all of your other shit.  why not give them to her before they left the house?  Sorry, that tiny thing just frove me nuts.

It also find the relationship with Tyler and his mom perplexing.  She has always seemed like the only one in their world who had some stability.  She always had one house she was living in, a long term job and actually was the only person .  It actually surprises me she did not put more effort into Tyler's education.  There definitely is something mysterious about her because she did have kids with Butch and her daughter had addiction issues.    What is the off thing about her that we don't know about?

 

Ah, you all!  I barely get to chat on these forums anymore.  But no one in my life watches Teen Mom any longer and it drives me so crazy it's one of the only shows I feel compelled to discuss.  I'm glad you're still here. 

 

 

[PicnicLife77]

Mackenzie's mom's death is also her storyline for the show. Which is gross in itself. But I'm sure her constantly tying her mom into everything has a lot to do with the cameras being around. 

[Cosmocrush]

 

20 hours ago, teapot said:

I’m sorry, did you not hear her?  She’s a GREAT mom!

The part that got me was when she told the 'therapist' she WORKS HARD.  Whuuut?  I've been watching this trash can show for 10 years and I've never seen her work at anything.   Is she talking about her social media?  

19 hours ago, Inga said:

Wow! Leah telling it like it is !!! She knows exactly what is up! She straight up said, when i go there, she just sleeps all day!!!

That made me so sad.  I flashed back to baby Leah crying in her dirty crib while Amber was passed out or otherwise stuck to the sofa.   I honestly had hoped that by this point Amber would be a different mom.   I don't care if Gary is in it to get the MTV money - if it's helped him provide a stable home for Leah then he can have it.  

[lilmarysunshine]

7 hours ago, Mothra said:

Are they truly unable to understand that to Bentley (and to those of us watching), Ryan has exactly no shits to give about Bentley?  And this is Maci's fault?  Are they really this delusional?  Are they all on crack?

100% and I don't like Maci. But these people are ridiculous. Neither Mac nor Ryan works, right? But they can't manage to catch a game or a wrestling match once a week? This is what these shitty parents don't seem to understand. When you're a good parent, it is self-indulgent to spend time with your kids because you WANT to.

I don't really like Taylor, either. I think he needs to get a job. My husband would be bored stiff spending his life gossiping about my ex's family. But Ryan and his parents ought to be thanking their lucky stars that Maci married someone who does seem to genuinely love Bentley and treats him as his own and does the stuff with him that a dad is supposed to. Early on I liked Jen and Larry. They seemed supportive of Maci even though she wasn't with Ryan anymore. But now I cannot believe how utterly dysfunctional that family is. I bet if I go back and look at old episodes, I'd see it clearly now as hindsight is 20/20. Yikes!

Edited March 25, 2021 by lilmarysunshine

[MargeGunderson]

2 hours ago, lilmarysunshine said:

100% and I don't like Maci. But these people are ridiculous. Neither Mac nor Ryan works, right? But they can't manage to catch a game or a wrestling match once a week? This is what these shitty parents don't seem to understand. When you're a good parent, it is self-indulgent to spend time with your kids because you WANT to.

I don't really like Taylor, either. I think he needs to get a job. My husband would be bored stiff spending his life gossiping about my ex's family. But Ryan and his parents ought to be thanking their lucky stars that Maci married someone who does seem to genuinely love Bentley and treats him as his own and does the stuff with him that a dad is supposed to. Early on I liked Jen and Larry. They seemed supportive of Maci even though she wasn't with Ryan anymore. But now I cannot believe how utterly dysfunctional that family is. I bet if I go back and look at old episodes, I'd see it clearly now as hindsight is 20/20. Yikes!

I wonder if Larry and Jen (and Ryan) see Maci/getting pregnant as the cause of Ryan getting addicted to drugs in the first place. Like without any of that Ryan would be doing just fine in life. I don’t think they’ve said anything like that, but seeing as how they like to blame Maci for everything, I bet it has crossed their minds, if not their lips. They seem to be completely delusional when it comes to Ryan.

[toodywoody]

When someone is a good mom they don't have to tell everyone that will listen. This is true about everything in life. 

I've had guys tell me how great they are and they weren't.  I've worked with numerous people that would let everyone know how hard they work, even though they didn't.  And then there is Amber saying she is a damn good mom when she isn't even a mother to her children.

[FozzyBear]

10 hours ago, toodywoody said:

When someone is a good mom they don't have to tell everyone that will listen. This is true about everything in life. 

I've had guys tell me how great they are and they weren't.  I've worked with numerous people that would let everyone know how hard they work, even though they didn't.  And then there is Amber saying she is a damn good mom when she isn't even a mother to her children.

It’s not funny (it’s really not) but I sort of snorted with laughter every time Amber said she was a damn good mom and was just met with silence. She can’t find one sycophant to agree with her there. Not even one. 

[geauxaway]

20 minutes ago, FozzyBear said:

It’s not funny (it’s really not) but I sort of snorted with laughter every time Amber said she was a damn good mom and was just met with silence. She can’t find one sycophant to agree with her there. Not even one. 

Where’s Bubby?  😂

[Persnickety1]

17 hours ago, IDreamofJoaquin said:

It also find the relationship with Tyler and his mom perplexing.  She has always seemed like the only one in their world who had some stability.  She always had one house she was living in, a long term job and actually was the only person .  It actually surprises me she did not put more effort into Tyler's education.  There definitely is something mysterious about her because she did have kids with Butch and her daughter had addiction issues.    What is the off thing about her that we don't know about?

I ask myself that very same question every time she appears on my screen.  

I'd really like some back story on how and why she and Butch got together.

With all of the WTF about the people on this show, the relationship between Tyler's parents perplexes me the most.

[FozzyBear]

1 hour ago, Persnickety1 said:

I ask myself that very same question every time she appears on my screen.  

I'd really like some back story on how and why she and Butch got together.

With all of the WTF about the people on this show, the relationship between Tyler's parents perplexes me the most.

My guess is that Tyler’s mom is a lot like Cait without the MTV money and the bad luck to fall for an addict. Cait has had a functional partner and money coming in so she didn’t really have to step up in the same way, but if she had to I actually think Cait would have gotten some sort of job to provided some sort of home for her kids. But she didn’t have to so she didn’t. They both have this sort of friendly indifference to their kids. They way Taylers mom was in the conversation about his school reminded me of how Cait always is with the kids. Neither of them seem like particularly proactive people. They do what they need to in order to have an ok life and that’s it. I think part of Tyler’s yelling style of conversation is to try and get his mom and/or wife to react to something (anything) with more than a shrug. Tyler gets frustrated with both of them for not wanting more. He imagines himself to be this ambitious guy but the women in his life just want a nice house and to be left alone. I even think Tyler’s mom and Cait look a little similar. That’s probably why she hasn’t always seemed to like Cait. She recognized a lot of herself and probably knew that as long as Tyler was with Cait he was never getting out into the world.

[MargeGunderson]

@FozzyBear, while I agree with a lot of what you wrote, Tyler’s not exactly lighting the world on fire himself. I think Tyler (and his mom) use Cate as a convenient scapegoat for holding Tyler back, but in the end he is responsible for his choices, none of which to date have been all that productive. He gets the “poor Tyler” narrative and can hide behind that rather than do anything to improve himself. I think Cate’s so scared of losing him that she would basically following him doing whatever he wants to do.

Edited March 26, 2021 by MargeGunderson

[FozzyBear]

15 minutes ago, MargeGunderson said:

@FozzyBear, while I agree with a lot of what you wrote, Tyler’s not exactly lighting the world on fire himself. I think Tyler (and his mom) use Cate as a convenient scapegoat for holding Tyler back, but in the end he is responsible for his choices, none of which to date have been all that productive. He gets the “poor Tyler” narrative and can hide behind that rather than do anything to improve himself. I think Cate’s so scared of losing him that she would basically following him doing whatever he wants to do.

Oh I agree! That’s why I said Tyler likes to THINK of himself as ambitious. I don’t think he actually is. I just think he likes to think of himself as somebody who “coulda been a contender!” I don’t think it’s Cait’s fault or his mom’s fault he didn’t make different choices. I just think Tyler thinks that and I think his mom sort of agrees as far as Cait is concerned.

[Mr. Miner]

I like how Leah told Gary to shut up when he called her “Boo Boo” the name her repulsive egg donor gave her.

 I have to FF Mac and Josh as I feel they are both dumb AF.

[BrownBear2012]

I just read that Ryan, Mac, Jen and Larry were FIRED! Of course Ryan is blaming this all on Maci.

[heatherchandler]

On 3/23/2021 at 8:34 PM, Chris Knight said:

 

I remain the sole Team Ryan member. It's lonely on this team, lol. Maci and Taylor have such ridiculously high opinions of themselves, and the way MTV turns the story against Ryan is very bad. I get that Ryan was/is an addict but I still think the Bentley story is 95% Maci-driven.

 

 

You are not the only one.  I am with you!  Maci sure does have a high opinion of herself.  And she is a horrible mother.  

9 hours ago, FozzyBear said:

It’s not funny (it’s really not) but I sort of snorted with laughter every time Amber said she was a damn good mom and was just met with silence. She can’t find one sycophant to agree with her there. Not even one. 

She had the gall to say, "I was there for her in the beginning."  Mothers are there for the kids ALWAYS and FOREVER.  She's pathetic.

[heatherchandler]

On 3/24/2021 at 6:01 PM, Andyourlittledog2 said:

Good gawd Amber is awful. A person who was trying to be a good mom would not simply insist that she already is one and that if her kid doesn't know that then that's on her. She seemed annoyed that Leah was growing up and seeing her for who she really is -- a shitty mom.  Amber's mom's silence to all of this delusional narcissistic thinking spoke volumes. Amber is not redeemable so don't waste your breath. Amber takes no responsibility for anything at all. She is all about herself.

And her letting that poor dog languish at the end of his life like that was terrible. She kept it alive just because she needed him and gave no thought to what the dog actually needed. It was awful watching that poor dog suffer at the end like that. But Amber sees nothing but herself and her needs and desires when she looks around her. 

Sorry about the shooting. I ff through Maci as I can't stand her but I did feel for her there. If she suddenly turns it into a lecture tour on surviving gas station shootings she will lose me though.

She's disgusting.

That was horrible.  Why would she just lay there and watch him suffer??

That will be Maci's whole storyline next year.  

 

On 3/24/2021 at 3:01 PM, BrownBear2012 said:

"Team" Ryan??? What's to cheer about with this guy? MTV just sets up a camera...Ryan's behavior speaks for itself. The "Bentley" story as to where it concerns Ryan is simple...Ryan treats his first born son like crap. Mocks him in public, mocks him private, trashes his mother on TV, never attends any of Bentley's activities and spends zero one on one time with him. And I'm not even including Ryan's susbstance abuse issues...I really see nothing to cheer about with someone who has basically abandoned his son and makes ZERO attempts to reconcile or have one on one time with him. Here's a thought...how about taking your son out for a burger and fries and having some very much needed one on one time with your kid...ask him about his life, apologize for your behavior and show him you actually care. Is that so hard to do? Instead of bitching about his mother and her husband, who are actually actively engaged in raising him. Are they flawed? Yes...but they try. Ryan isn't trying...he's allowed his parents to be the active participants in Bentley's life while he was out drinking, getting high on heroin and other stuff. Now is the time to step up and be a man. Admit your shortcomings and co-parent like an adult instead of an adolescent asshole. Even if it means quitting MTV...nothing is more important as a parent then having a good, healthy relationship with your child. It might mean Ryan would actually have to go get a job and actually be a productive member of society. He's the product of weak, codependent parenting...it's not all his fault. But now is the time to reverse course and do the right things by Bentley and his other kids. And Larry and Jen need to stop enabling him and condoning his immature and selfish behavior.

Maci would NEVER let him take Bentley.  She 100% keeps him away.  She claims that Bentley insisted that he and Ryan go to therapy together before he see him... but then Bentley says, "then I can see him more?"  The kid wants to see his dad.  But Maci cannot give up ANY control.  She thinks she is mom of the year, she pats herself on the back, but then she has extremely personal conversations with her 11 year old son ON CAMERA for a TV show for MONEY.  Her son looks so uncomfortable with all of this - you can tell by his body language he does not want his life on tv.  She does not care.

 

Edited March 26, 2021 by heatherchandler

[CandysWrapRoom]

On 3/23/2021 at 9:34 PM, Chris Knight said:

I remain the sole Team Ryan member. It's lonely on this team, lol. Maci and Taylor have such ridiculously high opinions of themselves, and the way MTV turns the story against Ryan is very bad. I get that Ryan was/is an addict but I still think the Bentley story is 95% Maci-driven.

You are brave. I am not Team Ryan. He's a horrible, selfish, narcissistic addict. I'm not Team Maci either. She has many flaws and only looks better when held up to Ryan in comparison. 

[BrownBear2012]

3 hours ago, heatherchandler said:

She's disgusting.

That was horrible.  Why would she just lay there and watch him suffer??

That will be Maci's whole storyline next year.  

 

Maci would NEVER let him take Bentley.  She 100% keeps him away.  She claims that Bentley insisted that he and Ryan go to therapy together before he see him... but then Bentley says, "then I can see him more?"  The kid wants to see his dad.  But Maci cannot give up ANY control.  She thinks she is mom of the year, she pats herself on the back, but then she has extremely personal conversations with her 11 year old son ON CAMERA for a TV show for MONEY.  Her son looks so uncomfortable with all of this - you can tell by his body language he does not want his life on tv.  She does not care.

 

Sorry...You know all this because?...even if it is true what you’re saying or alleging, then why didn’t Ryan go to court and get joint custody or designated shared custody? If I was in his situation and felt my kid was being held from me that is what I would do. Any loving and caring parent would do that instead of making heinous accusations on a TV show and whining about it. He left the visitation request up to his mommy to do...he never called Maci or Bentley and tried to make plans...in his usual lazy ass way, he sourced it out to his mommy. Please don’t try to paint Ryan as a concerned caring father to Bentley...Maci isn’t perfect and I have disagreed with some of the discussions that she has had on camera with Bentley, but she sure as hell is a better parent to him than Ryan. Making an accusation of parental alienation is serious...it might be wise to not make such a finite and sweeping accusation of this offense of someone you don’t know personally...unless you are Mac.

Edited March 27, 2021 by BrownBear2012

[heatherchandler]

3 hours ago, BrownBear2012 said:

Sorry...You know all this because?...even if it is true what you’re saying or alleging, then why didn’t Ryan go to court and get joint custody or designated shared custody? If I was in his situation and felt my kid was being held from me that is what I would do. Any loving and caring parent would do that instead of making heinous accusations on a TV show and whining about it. He left the visitation request up to his mommy to do...he never called Maci or Bentley and tried to make plans...in his usual lazy ass way, he sourced it out to his mommy. Please don’t try to paint Ryan as a concerned caring father to Bentley...Maci isn’t perfect and I have disagreed with some of the discussions that she has had on camera with Bentley, but she sure as hell is a better parent to him than Ryan. Making an accusation of parental alienation is serious...it might be wise to not make such a finite and sweeping accusation of this offense of someone you don’t know personally...unless you are Mac.

I know this because it is all on tv.  She’s made it clear he can’t see Bentley alone. She claims Bentley is pushing for joint therapy and that he will only see him if that happens.  When discussed, he seems to not know much about this plan that he supposedly came up with. His only question is if he can see his dad more.  

And while all of this is discussed, you can actually see the embarrassment on his face.  He specifically said he DOES NOT want to talk on camera about his therapy, and rather than respect the wishes of her son, she calls the therapist to discuss his issues on camera.  That’s selling him out FOR MONEY and it’s so beyond messed up I cannot believe anyone would defend it.
 

I’m not Mac.  I’m not the only person who sees right through Maci and her lies and BS. Ryan is obviously not well, and I have nothing but compassion for addicts.  

Maci doesn’t have another storyline so Bentley’s very personal issues have been turned into tv content.  He’s a minor, and this is wrong.  How can that be defended?

[DangerousMinds]

45 minutes ago, heatherchandler said:

I know this because it is all on tv.  She’s made it clear he can’t see Bentley alone. She claims Bentley is pushing for joint therapy and that he will only see him if that happens.  When discussed, he seems to not know much about this plan that he supposedly came up with. His only question is if he can see his dad more.  

And while all of this is discussed, you can actually see the embarrassment on his face.  He specifically said he DOES NOT want to talk on camera about his therapy, and rather than respect the wishes of her son, she calls the therapist to discuss his issues on camera.  That’s selling him out FOR MONEY and it’s so beyond messed up I cannot believe anyone would defend it.
 

I’m not Mac.  I’m not the only person who sees right through Maci and her lies and BS. Ryan is obviously not well, and I have nothing but compassion for addicts.  

Maci doesn’t have another storyline so Bentley’s very personal issues have been turned into tv content.  He’s a minor, and this is wrong.  How can that be defended?

That can’t be defended IMO, and I think ALL the parents in these shows are guilty of the same.

Edited March 27, 2021 by DangerousMinds

[BrownBear2012]

3 minutes ago, heatherchandler said:

I know this because it is all on tv.  She’s made it clear he can’t see Bentley alone. She claims Bentley is pushing for joint therapy and that he will only see him if that happens.  When discussed, he seems to not know much about this plan that he supposedly came up with. His only question is if he can see his dad more.  

And while all of this is discussed, you can actually see the embarrassment on his face.  He specifically said he DOES NOT want to talk on camera about his therapy, and rather than respect the wishes of her son, she calls the therapist to discuss his issues on camera.  That’s selling him out FOR MONEY and it’s so beyond messed up I cannot believe anyone would defend it.
 

I’m not Mac.  I’m not the only person who sees right through Maci and her lies and BS. Ryan is obviously not well, and I have nothing but compassion for addicts.  

Maci doesn’t have another storyline so Bentley’s very personal issues have been turned into tv content.  He’s a minor, and this is wrong.  How can that be defended?

Again...unless you are privy to their personal family issues, not just what you see on an edited TV show, I think it is prudent to not make accusations that are serious and inflammatory. Claiming that one parent is grossly negligent or is guilty of parental alienation can be used in court in custody decisions. Decisions that can be devastating to the child in question and all parties involved. I am not defending any of the behaviors of the adults on this show...they all have said and done things that are indefensible but I am certainly not going to accuse Maci of parental alienation or negligence. That is absurd.

[DangerousMinds]

24 minutes ago, BrownBear2012 said:

Again...unless you are privy to their personal family issues, not just what you see on an edited TV show, I think it is prudent to not make accusations that are serious and inflammatory. Claiming that one parent is grossly negligent or is guilty of parental alienation can be used in court in custody decisions. Decisions that can be devastating to the child in question and all parties involved. I am not defending any of the behaviors of the adults on this show...they all have said and done things that are indefensible but I am certainly not going to accuse Maci of parental alienation or negligence. That is absurd.

I don’t think any judge in a custody case is going to take our opinions here into account. We are all free to speculate and make our own judgments.

[snarts]

8 hours ago, heatherchandler said:

I know this because it is all on tv. She’s made it clear he can’t see Bentley alone. She claims Bentley is pushing for joint therapy and that he will only see him if that happens.  When discussed, he seems to not know much about this plan that he supposedly came up with. His only question is if he can see his dad more.  

Yet you claim you don't watch the show. I've actually watched (don't judge, it's a pandemic) and Bentley's never asked if he could see his dad more. Rather, he's shown hesitancy when told that Ryan would be at Jen/Larry's and utter reluctance to go to his Dad's house at all. 

IMO, Maci is raising Bentley 100% on her own and he appears to be healthy, happy, articulate & respectful.  

Ryan was and is not involved in the slightest.  His parents continue to try to force his involvement which has resulted in him treating Bentley like a little brother he can rag on rather than his son.  Even with his parents urging (& financial backing), Ryan couldn't be bothered to formalize custody & a visitation schedule with the courts.  He just doesn't care.  

We've had 11 years of watching him not care.  We've also had 11 years of watching Bentley's relationship with the Edwards family.  Maci did not legally have to allow that but she did. Bentley's now old enough to express his own opinions. He's requested some boundaries and his mom is trying to enforce them.  I, for one, applaud her for being his advocate and I don't blame her one bit for having concerns about his oft arrested, obviously drug abusing, uninterested father. 

Edited March 27, 2021 by snarts
Un vs. Non

[Persnickety1]

On 3/26/2021 at 8:45 AM, FozzyBear said:

My guess is that Tyler’s mom is a lot like Cait without the MTV money and the bad luck to fall for an addict. Cait has had a functional partner and money coming in so she didn’t really have to step up in the same way, but if she had to I actually think Cait would have gotten some sort of job to provided some sort of home for her kids. But she didn’t have to so she didn’t. They both have this sort of friendly indifference to their kids. They way Taylers mom was in the conversation about his school reminded me of how Cait always is with the kids. Neither of them seem like particularly proactive people. They do what they need to in order to have an ok life and that’s it. I think part of Tyler’s yelling style of conversation is to try and get his mom and/or wife to react to something (anything) with more than a shrug. Tyler gets frustrated with both of them for not wanting more. He imagines himself to be this ambitious guy but the women in his life just want a nice house and to be left alone. I even think Tyler’s mom and Cait look a little similar. That’s probably why she hasn’t always seemed to like Cait. She recognized a lot of herself and probably knew that as long as Tyler was with Cait he was never getting out into the world.

Well, maybe but...BUTCH?  I know it's probably a small town but surely there had to be other eligible men to choose from.

What I can't understand is why she was attracted to Butch in the first place.  From what I gather by watching the show, he's been a hot mess for decades whereas Tyler's mom seems pretty grounded.  Maybe she herself met him during a rough patch in her life or maybe he was already a hot mess and she was attracted to bad boys.  Maybe she thought she could "save" him from himself.  

I can completely understand the toxic relationship between April and Butch, because IMO it was probably two addicts enabling one another, but I've never heard of Tyler's mom having a past history of any sort of addiction or a dysfunctional upbringing herself.

It's just something I'll probably never be able to wrap my head around.  

And I probably waste too many brain cells trying to figure out all of these people when I could be doing something more productive like cleaning the grout in my kitchen tiles or scrubbing a toilet bowl.  😄