S09.E07: Where Is My Husband?

[Yeah No]

3 hours ago, Gem 10 said:

I really don’t think Elizabeth’s question was that bad at all.  She was simply asking about his parents divorce.  He jumped the gun and got nasty first, attacking her about her job which I think was bugging him.  He started questioning her about her not finishing school, and then working for daddy.  That was below the belt first, so she finished it with the biggest whammy of all, his sexual prowness.  He started it IMO.

I agree with you and have posted to that effect as well, but did she have to go and burn her bridges with him in response?  I think he went below the belt first, but she took out a machete and did a figurative Lorena Bobbitt on him.  And in this case I don't even think they can sew it back on, LOL.  I can just imagine the circumstances surrounding her unemployment.  With her inability to control her mouth she may have burned enough bridges by now that she pretty much HAS to work for Daddy and is unemployable otherwise.  Yikes.

[Yeah No]

3 hours ago, topanga said:

I think the criticism of Amber is harsh—not just you, Jeanne222, but in general. No, she’s not Cindy Crawford pretty or Halle Berry pretty, but that’s not the only reason Matt doesn’t seem to want her. And even if she got fake boobs and wore 5-inch heels every day and went to the beauty shop every day, that still wouldn’t be enough. Amber is never going to be 5’10”, she’s never going to have hair like Julia Roberts or have a deep, sultry voice. If Matt isn’t attracted to her, then he just isn’t. 

Iris lounges around in yoga pants and t-shirts, wearing her glasses and very little makeup. She doesn’t even comb her hair sometimes. And Keith is still nice to her. 

My point is that society shoulders women with a lot of the blame for why men might or might not be attracted to them, why they don’t love them, why they cheat, and why they leave their wives and families for other partners. 

It takes two people to have a good relationship. I don’t think it’s fair that Amber has to take 100% of the blame for whatever is going on between them. 

I've criticized Amber's lack of attention to her appearance, but I certainly don't expect women to shoulder 100% of the blame for men not being attracted to them.  I just don't think it helps attract a partner if anyone, male or female, doesn't show a basic respect for their own appearance.  I would and have been just as harsh on men who don't do this too.  I agree with you that Matt would probably not like Amber even if she did wear more attractive clothing, etc., but she does herself no favors looking like the little girl she acts like.  I think everyone has at least some responsibility in influencing how others perceive them or I wouldn't have loved the show "What Not to Wear" for so many years.  You know, basic logic like "If you want a man to see you as an adult, it helps dress like one".   A person that dresses like a child will tend to act like one and others will treat them like one.  If you want respect you have to earn it.  You can't just sit there and act like a messy kid and then complain that no one respects you.  I think Matt is awful too but she is a mess in more ways than just her appearance and I wouldn't blame any guy for not liking her.

[Yeah No]

12 hours ago, Sterling said:

You're so right, and my apologies for the generalization!  I grew up with 2 other siblings, and we all shared a bathroom, so I don't have that experience of being the only child.  I was basing my observations of Iris on my prior roommate, but I was also married to an only child who was the most caring, sharing individual I ever knew.  So....generalizations....gone!  🙂

Not sure where Iris' issues stem from, but perhaps it's wrapped up into virginity/lemonade/2-drink max control issues.

I adore Iris.  I think she's just the cutest girl, and she can wear clothes & accessories like I've always dreamed.  I just hope she can relax a bit & let sweet Keith enjoy her, and their life together.

Thanks.  I also remembered how different it was when I was a kid.  I lived in a city neighborhood with a lot of kids and we all played outside all day long, sharing toys and learning how to interact with other people.  Plus my parents and I lived in a small apartment, so it was not possible for me to have much of my own space.  I had my own room but it was teeny tiny and my parents were always very close to me (and never left me alone, LOL). 

This also made me think that kids in more recent decades did not have that experience and so you can find more Irises out there that may not have had to learn to share with other kids that much and had a relatively sheltered childhood with parents catering to them.  Also, there is more of a tendency to raise kids nowadays to be little snowflakes and over-indulged princesses that should be and have everything they want.  And even Elizabeth is one of those "Daddy's little girls".  The only children of my era were raised by parents that grew up during the Great Depression, which is relevant because they were always reminding us how harsh the world was and did not spare us any criticism.  The message was that we were not that special so we shouldn't expect everything the way we want it to be.  It cut us down to size in many ways.  "Who do you think you are?" was one of their phrases when we got out of line by taking too much food or whatever.  And we were not like the stereotype of the spoiled child either because our parents raised us to be modest and have manners.  They were the authorities and we had to obey them.  Even if they loved us dearly and we knew it, we always knew that they were the boss and we couldn't question it.  Ours were the parents that always made us feel guilty on holidays because we had a nice meal and gifts while there were "Children starving in Africa" (or India) or some other place.  But I digress.....You get the picture!  😉

[gonecrackers]

As others have said Jamie & Liz fight dirty; one gets nasty the other gets nastier. I don't think Jamie will out nasty Liz though. Interesting thought, @Yeah No about how her being mouthy could've caused employment issues.

I think what bothers me most about Liz is her hypocrisy. She's presenting herself as free spirited, anything goes, accepting, career minded, truthful (her own words at her wedding were she wouldn't lie to him), etc. Then she ends up being bitchy if things aren't going her way, 'works' for her father, lies easily, & goes on the attack fairly easily as well. She's nothing like what she says she is - & she's not "quirky", she's simply a nut case. She's coming off just as needy as Amber but in a different, attention seeking can't take care of herself (Daddy passed the registration renewal torch) kind of way.

I'm not sure I see Amber as dressing like a child, but maybe that's because I'm no fashionista. I do think she presents badly, in that she definitely acts very childlike. Even if she found a laid back, sporty guy who is fine with her looks, her neediness & abandonment issues will get in the way & scare him off. They can also cause her real trouble with men, as those are neon signs for abusers, & not just ones who will gladly take her paycheck.

[Yeah No]

17 minutes ago, gonecrackers said:

I'm not sure I see Amber as dressing like a child, but maybe that's because I'm no fashionista. I do think she presents badly, in that she definitely acts very childlike. Even if she found a laid back, sporty guy who is fine with her looks, her neediness & abandonment issues will get in the way & scare him off. They can also cause her real trouble with men, as those are neon signs for abusers, & not just ones who will gladly take her paycheck.

I think most women can dress like her and not look like a child, but she tends to look very young so she would have to take special care to choose clothes that make her look closer to her age.  I've been re-watching old episodes of "What not to Wear" lately and there were women on the show like her that looked like kids in what they were wearing.  There was even a teacher that Stacy said looked like one of her students, LOL.  I think if Stacy London got a hold of Amber she could make her look fantastic.  She's cute and Mr. Yeah No says there's something about her that reminds him of me when I was young, only he says when I was 21, not 27 (before I wore makeup and more girly clothes), and of course that I was "much more beautiful", LOL (bless his heart).  BTW, I'm also 5'2".  I think being short and petite can often make you look younger.

Edited July 30, 2019 by Yeah No

[Gem 10]

17 hours ago, ladyscorpio said:

Agree 100%!!! I was thinking the same!! Especially when she just barely met the guy and kept begging to make out with her over an over in front of everyone and on t.v.  I seriously think she has some mental issues or maybe she's like kinda slow? I can't believe she would be okay with all of her middle school students watching all of this. It seems like she is on their level as far as maturity goes and I wouldn't be surprised if she ended up on the news for sleeping with one or more of her students. I don't think Matt is a bad guy. I think they paired him with the opposite of what they should've.  All the basketball wives I've seen,  are gorgeous with a perfect body, perfect makeup an perfect hair done.  I knew from the first time I saw her that he was not going to be into her. Then to make matters worse she has this cling on desperate never leave my sight thing going on. No wonder he's scared shitless!! She does look like a 13 year old boy, she has no body, nothing is attractive about her physically or mentally or emotionally.  I think he deserves a do over!! 

Another “expert” screwup.  I knew from Day one she wasn’t for him.  He was expecting a tall, willowy, hot sexy beautiful woman.  I think looks are important to him.  But, he’s using her for sex, which isn’t nice.

[LilaFowler]

If I saw Amber on the street I wouldn't think twice about the way that she's dressed. She's one of those younger people who is perpetually ultra-casual and makeup-free. Personally, if I were on national TV I would probably dress a little nicer and wear more makeup than I normally would in daily life.

Edited July 30, 2019 by LilaFowler

[lh25]

18 hours ago, Crazy Bird Lady said:

Actually, that's why I'm not as mad at Beth as most posters here seem to be. At first Jamie sarcastically pretended to have a 'serious' personal discussion about her work status, which he probably already knew was a very big trigger point for Beth.

I think that's a great point, and I missed it.

The fact he did that, and that she reacted like she did and it escalated to low blows from them both, tells me they shouldn't be together.

[Ohwell]

4 hours ago, LilaFowler said:

If I saw Amber on the street I wouldn't think twice about the way that she's dressed. She's one of those younger people who is perpetually ultra-casual and makeup-free. Personally, if I were on national TV I would probably dress a little nicer and wear more makeup than I normally would in daily life.

And that's my issue with her.  Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't think twice about the way she dresses either, but she knew she'd be on national tv, so she should have dressed nicer, combed her hair, and worn a bit of makeup.  

However, I will say that at least she doesn't dress like a slut like Elizabeth in that pink outfit she wore on Unfiltered.  Ugh.  

Edited July 30, 2019 by Ohwell

[Ilovepie]

17 hours ago, topanga said:

Amber is never going to be 5’10”, she’s never going to have hair like Julia Roberts or have a deep, sultry voice. If Matt isn’t attracted to her, then he just isn’t. 

Iris lounges around in yoga pants and t-shirts, wearing her glasses and very little makeup. She doesn’t even comb her hair sometimes. And Keith is still nice to her. 

True Amber can't be 5'10", but she could at least comb her hair. And while Iris does wear lounge clothes when she is home, she does dress up and pull together a look when it's required. Plus, I think she spends a lot of time on her hair. And I love it. Amber's go to is stringy hair and super casual at all times. I couldn't believe the sweatshirt she wore to her Aunt's house. It wasn't even cute - just a plain old sweatshirt that looked like something I could get at Walmart........

[Jeanne222]

I honestly think Amber is just being Amber.  The Amber we saw on the wedding day was the result of hair stylest and makeup artist.  The Amber we see today is the real thing.

I think the 'experts' thought the both being basketball players and fans was the glue.

She wanted a forever guy and he wanted a glamour puss.

I think they are both disappointed.  I would love to hear from Matt's family. 

[Ilovepie]

2 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

honestly think Amber is just being Amber.  The Amber we saw on the wedding day was the result of hair stylest and makeup artist.  The Amber we see today is the real thing.

I agree, and that right there is the problem. Matt said on Unfiltered that he was disappointed when he saw her at the wedding. If he was disappointed with how she looked at the wedding, how much more when they returned home and she went back to her "normal" look!

[Ohwell]

1 hour ago, Ilovepie said:

I agree, and that right there is the problem. Matt said on Unfiltered that he was disappointed when he saw her at the wedding. If he was disappointed with how she looked at the wedding, how much more when they returned home and she went back to her "normal" look!

I don't watch every episode of Unfiltered so I didn't see the one with Matt, so that's really saying something that he said he was disappointed when he saw her.   Was he asked what he thought about her looks or did he voluntarily say it?  Did he say anything else, like he grew to appreciate how she looked?   Just curious.

[princelina]

I think that if you want to marry a STRANGER, you need to be okay with presenting your best self looks-wise, and being asked questions that you might find intrusive.  Especially if you are doing it for a TV show!

The shot of Amber coming home from work showed her in a dress and low heels and I thought she looked cute and appropriate, so obviously she knows how.

[Ilovepie]

44 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

Was he asked what he thought about her looks or did he voluntarily say it? 

He was asked about her height, then he hedged slightly, and then admitted he was disappointed. I don't recall if he said anything else about it. Either way, his initial thought at seeing her was disappointment.......

[Ohwell]

Ok, thanks!  I wonder if she saw that episode and, if so, I do feel bad for her because there's nothing she can do about her height or her looks (except comb that hair!).  She is who she is.  I blame the "experts."

[lids]

Yeah, Matt just said he was disappointed in her height but several times in the episode he said he found Amber’s looks attractive. And apparently the spoilers that came out after the show say:

Spoiler

Someone posted a screen cap of Matt posting to someone’s DMs and the woman says something about their height difference may be a problem and Matt says something like, “I’ve heard good things come in small packages.” 

Seemingly, short woman are not a turn-off for Matt... I guess when he’s looking for something casual, at least.

This just goes back to what they say in The Rules or He’s Just Not That Into You. A man doesn’t become infatuated because he thinks a woman’s attractive; he decides she must be attractive when he becomes infatuated with her.

Amber could have presented herself with high self-esteem and a captivating personality and Matt would see her differently. But she’s not doing that right now. Maybe she’ll switch it up as she works with the experts. If he woke up in the morning and she was already out running or he came home and she was engrossed in conversation with her friends, he would try to get her attention and try to know more about her. She has repeatedly shown him that he’s going to be the center of her life and she doesn’t have much of her own identity without him. Of course he doesn’t want to tie himself to that. But I doubt it’s just about her looks. Many an unattractive woman has been able to wrap men around their fingers and all of a sudden people are pronouncing them captivating. I’m looking at you Jennifer Anniston.

Edited July 31, 2019 by lids

[Drogo]

Matt doesn't not like Amber because she's not pretty enough. 

Matt doesn't like Amber because he's a fucking transient. A migrant worker who has no real desire to settle down anywhere with anyone.

He's been set off and checked out since the moment she volunteered to help him establish his business, aka plant roots. 

[DrewPaul2010]

13 hours ago, Gem 10 said:

Another “expert” screwup.  I knew from Day one she wasn’t for him.  He was expecting a tall, willowy, hot sexy beautiful woman.  I think looks are important to him.  But, he’s using her for sex, which isn’t nice.

I was going to say he didn't exactly abstain from sex. If he already knows in the heart of his hearts he's not going to stay married he should person up and tell her. I hope we don't watch 7 weeks of him playing her like a violin. He must have indicated that height didn't matter to him but if so that was his screw up. I don't want to overstep but I'm guessing tall woman prefer tall men. This must be a good season I haven't seen this go out to 10 pages before. I bet the producers love to see this.

1 minute ago, Drogo said:

Matt doesn't not like Amber because she's not pretty enough. 

Matt doesn't like Amber because he's a fucking transient. A migrant worker who has no real desire to settle down anywhere with anyone.

He's been set off and checked out since the moment she volunteered to help him establish his business, aka plant roots. 

Don't sugar coat it Drago...

[DrewPaul2010]

Quote

She has repeatedly shown him that he’s going to be the center of her life and she doesn’t have much of her own identity without him. Of course he doesn’t want to tie himself to that.

I do. I want to tie myself to a woman who makes me the center of her universe...

[Drogo]

4 minutes ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

Don't sugar coat it Drago...

[Elizzikra]

On 7/26/2019 at 10:18 AM, Elizzikra said:

I don't watch every episode of Unfiltered so I didn't see the one with Matt, so that's really saying something that he said he was disappointed when he saw her.   Was he asked what he thought about her looks or did he voluntarily say it?  Did he say anything else, like he grew to appreciate how she looked?   Just curious.

Or did Jamie Otis totally cut him off and drone on again about how she wasn't initially attracted to Doug and now she can't get enough of him?

[configdotsys]

On 7/29/2019 at 3:58 PM, ladyscorpio said:

  All the basketball wives I've seen,  are gorgeous with a perfect body, perfect makeup an perfect hair done.  I knew from the first time I saw her that he was not going to be into her. Then to make matters worse she has this cling on desperate never leave my sight thing going on. No wonder he's scared shitless!! She does look like a 13 year old boy, she has no body, nothing is attractive about her physically or mentally or emotionally.  I think he deserves a do over!! 

Matt was a third rate b-ball player who went undrafted by every team in the NBA so he bounced around other countries essentially playing for room and board. After college he extended his adolescence and played a game that brought him little in the way of returns and he wasn't even that good. The idea that he is owed a "basketball wife" is absurd and he's delusional and needs to buy a clue if that's what he thinks. 

On 7/29/2019 at 5:01 PM, Ohwell said:

She didn't even have to be done up like a basketball wife because many of them are fake (boobs, hair extensions, etc.), but I think Matt was expecting someone more appealing than Amber.  Granted, he doesn't have movie star looks, but I do think he looks better than Amber.  

I hope so. As I said above, he was a non-entity in the sports world so if he thinks he is owed a knockout, he needs a serious reality check. I'm not sure what type of woman would have made him happy. I mean, let's take a made up, fake boob, injected lip, Barbie doll and ask her if she'll grind and work extra to help him establish a detailing business. She'd probably laugh. Amber, the plain vanilla Jane was willing to do that because she either has a good heart or is foolishly gullible. Either way, Matt's reaction to that was not appreciation at all. He wigged out off camera and turned into a wuss when the cameras came back on. Seems his best bet is a sugar mama who will fund his adolescence going forward. 

On 7/30/2019 at 10:10 AM, LilaFowler said:

If I saw Amber on the street I wouldn't think twice about the way that she's dressed. She's one of those younger people who is perpetually ultra-casual and makeup-free. Personally, if I were on national TV I would probably dress a little nicer and wear more makeup than I normally would in daily life.

Hell, I'm just north of 50 and this describes me to a tee. Ultra casual and no make up is who I am. 

On 7/30/2019 at 10:31 AM, Ohwell said:

And that's my issue with her.  Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't think twice about the way she dresses either, but she knew she'd be on national tv, so she should have dressed nicer, combed her hair, and worn a bit of makeup.  

I totally agree about the hair. I really do. I view them as two completely different issues. Unclean, stringy, wiry, unkempt looking is a deal breaker. But a fresh faced, clean clothes/hair etc. sans make up is just fine. I'm a what you see is what you get sort of person and would not alter my appearance by wearing make up or whatever in order to please others because that's just not who I am and I remain true to myself above all. In my home, I am comfy in the way that comfy means to me. That most certainly does not mean dirty or ripped clothing, but it does not mean sexy nighties, make up, and stuff like that. I can't help but think of the scene in Mrs. Maisel when Midge would jump out of bed to make sure all the cold cream was off her face before her husband woke up. As if it is some kind of crime for your spouse to see you that way. I could never live under such circumstances.

There is a part of me that admires Amber sticking to who she is. I think her personality combined with her casualness is what is doom for her. Acting like a middle school girl is extremely unattractive but if she wore make up and tight skirts and had perfectly coiffed hair, she'd get a pass on being a giggly silly, girlish fool.  

Edited July 31, 2019 by configdotsys

[pdlinda]

On 7/29/2019 at 2:57 PM, AussieBabe said:

Apparently the experts need to add drug tests (Derek of Derek/Heather), employment verification, and psych evals to this scientific rubbish they’re pushing.

On that basis, the show would likely permanently FOLD!!....the available pool of candidates (regardless of the "lines" of prospects they always show when the next season is promoted) must be mighty SLIM as it is without adding those 3 categories!!😄

[gonecrackers]

2 hours ago, Elizzikra said:

Or did Jamie Otis totally cut him off and drone on again about how she wasn't initially attracted to Doug and now she can't get enough of him?

Amazingly, she did not.

23 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

There is a part of me that admires Amber sticking to who she is. I think her personality combined with her casualness is what is doom for her. Acting like a middle school girl is extremely unattractive but if she wore make up and tight skirts and had perfectly coiffed hair, she'd get a pass on being a giggly silly, girlish fool.  

A pass from Matt, maybe, as long as she wasn't overly attached & didn't offer to support him.

Edited July 31, 2019 by gonecrackers
clarification

[topanga]

23 minutes ago, pdlinda said:

On that basis, the show would likely permanently FOLD!!....the available pool of candidates (regardless of the "lines" of prospects they always show when the next season is promoted) must be mighty SLIM as it is without adding those 3 categories!!😄

Too funny. Didn’t someone say Keith was a weed-head? Or if this was just speculation, then never mind. 

[lids]

2 hours ago, topanga said:

Too funny. Didn’t someone say Keith was a weed-head? Or if this was just speculation, then never mind. 

I said that. 😂 It was total speculation. (But if it turns out to be true, I knew it all the time!)

[humbleopinion]

I'd need to totally marsh my mellow to put up with Iris' nonsensical idiosyncrasies and loony rules stacked high to the ceiling...Keith, pass the gummy edibles...

[Kareem]

The always animated Iris will be on Unfiltered again tonight so buckle up.  

[Ohwell]

8 minutes ago, Kareem said:

The always animated Iris will be on Unfiltered again tonight so buckle up.  

I'm sure Jamie will ask her about Lemonadegate.

[Kareem]

1 minute ago, Ohwell said:

I'm sure Jamie will ask her about Lemonadegate.

And say that she agrees with the Guardian of the Groceries, no doubt.  

[topanga]

4 hours ago, Kareem said:

The always animated Iris will be on Unfiltered again tonight so buckle up.  

4 hours ago, Ohwell said:

I'm sure Jamie will ask her about Lemonadegate.

4 hours ago, Kareem said:

And say that she agrees with the Guardian of the Groceries, no doubt.  

This should be good.

But I really want to hear from Deonna. Why hasn't she been on Unfiltered yet? Can contestants refuse to go on? I would hope not. 

Edited August 1, 2019 by topanga
Deonna has 2 Ns, not three.

[Gem 10]

On 7/29/2019 at 11:51 PM, Yeah No said:

I've criticized Amber's lack of attention to her appearance, but I certainly don't expect women to shoulder 100% of the blame for men not being attracted to them.  I just don't think it helps attract a partner if anyone, male or female, doesn't show a basic respect for their own appearance.  I would and have been just as harsh on men who don't do this too.  I agree with you that Matt would probably not like Amber even if she did wear more attractive clothing, etc., but she does herself no favors looking like the little girl she acts like.  I think everyone has at least some responsibility in influencing how others perceive them or I wouldn't have loved the show "What Not to Wear" for so many years.  You know, basic logic like "If you want a man to see you as an adult, it helps dress like one".   A person that dresses like a child will tend to act like one and others will treat them like one.  If you want respect you have to earn it.  You can't just sit there and act like a messy kid and then complain that no one respects you.  I think Matt is awful too but she is a mess in more ways than just her appearance and I wouldn't blame any guy for not liking her.

He seemed to like her on the wedding day as she looked very attractive, but then, she didn’t put much thought into how she looked after that.  Men are very visual, so she should put in a little more effort in her appearance.  Her hair was always stringy.  It takes five minutes to put your best foot forward.  Just because she was married doesn’t mean she can let go of her appearance.  Maybe after 20, 30 or 40 years, lol ..even then.  It’s nice to look spiffy for your husband.  It makes him proud.

Edited July 31, 2019 by Gem 10

[Gem 10]

1 hour ago, topanga said:

This should be good.

But I really want to hear from Deonnna. Why hasn't she been on Unfiltered yet? Can contestants refuse to go on? I would hope not. 

Oh goody.  Can’t wait for this. I’d love to hear what she has to say.  She keeps blaming her past.  If that is true, she shouldnt have come on the show.

[Gem 10]

19 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:

I do. I want to tie myself to a woman who makes me the center of her universe...

You will tire of that when you can’t breathe anymore.

[Gem 10]

3 hours ago, lids said:

I said that. 😂 It was total speculation. (But if it turns out to be true, I knew it all the time!)

Ha, that’s why nothing bothers him.  He’s chill.  He should give her some so maybe she will shut the hell up.  Share some with Deonna too.

[Auntie]

I'm rewatching this episode now...yes, I'm a glutton for punishment.

The "soliloquy" rendered by Iris where she attempts fake tears about Keith's grama's health - - they totally stitched that together. She walked past the same house and construction equipment 4 times during that 'performance.' Come on, MAFS producers, stop taking us for a bunch of idiots please.

Me and Keith, me and Keith's. OMG - please use proper English, Iris. Oh, and while you're at it, please learn how to cut an avocado and a tomato. Oh, and news flash - Iris is a VIRGIN!!!! So glad she finally told us all that. Again. For the 1000th time.

DaddyBeth - washing wine glasses in the dishwasher. Really?? You hand wash and dry them.

DaddyBeth's dad, still creepy as ever. But don't worry, DaddyBeth's Dad, she still thinks you and your pen*% are the best. She is such a mammoth loser. I fell sorry for the people that work for your LoveOfYourLife Dad - once you get to work, doing nothing for a paycheck, I'm sure the workforce will make a mass exodus out the front door.

Mr. and Mrs. Amber WhateverHerLastNameIs. Wow, what a train wreck. Maybe when this is all over, and they are happily divorced, and he's playing sub-minor league bball somewhere overseas, she can find time to buy shampoo and a brush.

I just saw a preview of tonight's new episode and it showed DaddyBeth and Jamie sitting with "Sargent Pepper" and DaddyBeth says "My husband wants a divorce."

[Neurochick]

7 hours ago, pdlinda said:

On that basis, the show would likely permanently FOLD!!....the available pool of candidates (regardless of the "lines" of prospects they always show when the next season is promoted) must be mighty SLIM as it is without adding those 3 categories!!😄

Here's the thing with this show.  First they need to find people who are willing to be "married at first sight and do it on camera."    Then they have to find people who are "camera ready."  That's not easy.  I remember one season there were some people who were selected and decided they didn't want to do the show.  One man said he couldn't because of work, and a woman said her family told her not to do it.

[Gem 10]

2 hours ago, Auntie said:

I'm rewatching this episode now...yes, I'm a glutton for punishment.

The "soliloquy" rendered by Iris where she attempts fake tears about Keith's grama's health - - they totally stitched that together. She walked past the same house and construction equipment 4 times during that 'performance.' Come on, MAFS producers, stop taking us for a bunch of idiots please.

Me and Keith, me and Keith's. OMG - please use proper English, Iris. Oh, and while you're at it, please learn how to cut an avocado and a tomato. Oh, and news flash - Iris is a VIRGIN!!!! So glad she finally told us all that. Again. For the 1000th time.

DaddyBeth - washing wine glasses in the dishwasher. Really?? You hand wash and dry them.

DaddyBeth's dad, still creepy as ever. But don't worry, DaddyBeth's Dad, she still thinks you and your pen*% are the best. She is such a mammoth loser. I fell sorry for the people that work for your LoveOfYourLife Dad - once you get to work, doing nothing for a paycheck, I'm sure the workforce will make a mass exodus out the front door.

Mr. and Mrs. Amber WhateverHerLastNameIs. Wow, what a train wreck. Maybe when this is all over, and they are happily divorced, and he's playing sub-minor league bball somewhere overseas, she can find time to buy shampoo and a brush.

I just saw a preview of tonight's new episode and it showed DaddyBeth and Jamie sitting with "Sargent Pepper" and DaddyBeth says "My husband wants a divorce."

Haha .. sounds like you are disgusted like I am.  I am do sick of Iris and her virgin talk.  I’ve never heard so much talk about it.  Her and Deonna too.  Do it already and shut up.  Boy, those husbands have a lot of patience with these two.  They both are not teens, but grown women.  At this point, it’s enough already. These guys have done enough already to make them comfortable, especially Gregg.  These two men are like dogs waiting for that bone.  I’m embarrassed for Greg.  Deonna is putting on a timeline when they will maybe do it again, IF she’s in the mood.

Edited August 1, 2019 by Gem 10

[Elizzikra]

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Men are very visual, so she should put in a little more effort in her appearance.  Her hair was always stringy.  It takes five minutes to put your best foot forward.  Just because she was married doesn’t mean she can let go of her appearance.  Maybe after 20, 30 or 40 years, lol ..even then.  It’s nice to look spiffy for your husband.  It makes him proud.

I think that Amber should be who she is. If she's not into the whole hair/makeup thing then she shouldn't do it. Everyone deserves a spouse who is proud of him/her because of who they are as a person, not how they look. She should be clean and dressed for the occasion but apart from that, I don't think there should be expectations that she get dolled up to any degree to visually please her husband. 

[Gem 10]

1 hour ago, Elizzikra said:

I think that Amber should be who she is. If she's not into the whole hair/makeup thing then she shouldn't do it. Everyone deserves a spouse who is proud of him/her because of who they are as a person, not how they look. She should be clean and dressed for the occasion but apart from that, I don't think there should be expectations that she get dolled up to any degree to visually please her husband. 

O.k. ... well then, why are people on here complaining that her hair is greasy and she needs a brush ????????.   Keeping your hair clean and a little lipstick isn’t getting dolled up.  

[PityFree]

Amber should have told the hair and make up people for the wedding to keep it light and simple.  She didn’t and she didn’t look like herself at the wedding. 

[Elizzikra]

2 hours ago, Gem 10 said:

O.k. ... well then, why are people on here complaining that her hair is greasy and she needs a brush ????????.   Keeping your hair clean and a little lipstick isn’t getting dolled up.  

Everyone is entitled to a different opinion, so people come here to express it. People don't have to agree with me. I think Amber should keep her hair (and the rest of her body) clean but to a lot of people, lipstick isn't a part of their daily routine and it would constitute getting dolled up. Amber isn't obligated to wear it now that she is married. I don't wear lipstick every day and I don't think that my husband is any more or less proud to be married to me based on what I put on my face at any given time.

But where I really disagree is that any woman should feel compelled to do anything to her hair or makeup or clothing choices to make her husband "proud." It evokes a very 1950's image of a woman in a dress and crinoline and heels pushing a vacuum cleaner with one hand and mixing a martini for her husband with the other. 

Quote

Amber should have told the hair and make up people for the wedding to keep it light and simple.  She didn’t and she didn’t look like herself at the wedding. 

I also don't understand why this is a problem. She doesn't walk around every day in a wedding dress either. I don't wear makeup every day and usually my hair is down or in a bun. I had a lot of makeup and a fairly elaborate updo for my wedding. Why? I wanted to. I think that sort of thing is fun - I just don't want to do it every day. Why can't Amber be low maintenance in her regular life but want a different look for what's supposed to be a once-in-a-lifetime occasion (though in her case, I'm guessing this might not be a lifelong marriage)?

[Gem 10]

23 minutes ago, Elizzikra said:

But where I really disagree is that any woman should feel compelled to do anything to her hair or makeup or clothing choices to make her husband "proud." It evokes a very 1950's image of a woman in a dress and crinoline and heels pushing a vacuum cleaner with one hand and mixing a martini for her husband with the other. 

I fix my hair nicely and wear light makeup, everyday, for myself. even to the grocery store.  I also evoke a 50’s image and have been happily married for 54 years to the same man.  No pressure either.  Guess it works.

[configdotsys]

3 hours ago, Gem 10 said:

I fix my hair nicely and wear light makeup, everyday, for myself. even to the grocery store.  I also evoke a 50’s image and have been happily married for 54 years to the same man.  No pressure either.  Guess it works.

The issue for me is the men are visual creatures thing in which the end of that sentence-- usually unsaid-- is, "so you need to get dolled up and whatnot or he won't be interested." I guess to that I'd say, "There's the door," only because that is just not me. 

I don't want to be misunderstood: dirty and unkempt is understandably unacceptable, but her choice to not wear make up or to wear casual clothing 99% of the time is something I don't see a problem with. The only reason it's a problem is because her relationship/marriage was not constructed in the usual way. Matt was given her as a spouse and is not happy with her look. It wasn't like she was out at a party and Matt had the opportunity to say thanks but no thanks because she didn't meet his expectations. But that should not be a reason to expect Amber to change who she is in order to please this dude. They're just not a match. The suggestion that Amber needs to adapt to his wants by changing who she is is off-putting to me because no one is asking Matt to do that. No one is suggesting that he just cut it out and be attracted to a person in tee shirts and no make up. 

Not snarking on you at all @Gem 10. 

[Kareem]

I get both sides of The Amber Debate and ok for her if makeup isn’t her thing, but it wouldn’t kill her to run a rake through that uneven, wavy mess she’s sporting, and it always looks like she dunked her head in the transmission.  Fix that!

[love2lovebadtv]

On 7/25/2019 at 11:34 AM, Neurochick said:

Correct.  Paul went batshit crazy though instead of talking with Karine, if only he spoke her language instead of using that translator app.😫

Iris could have CALMLY talked to Keith AFTER the party.

I would love it if this show paired off a couple who didn't want to have children, I think that would be very interesting.  Matt wants a partner who will travel the world with him; the problem is that Amber wants a traditional marriage.  Now she feels bad because she jumped on him like he was the last rose of summer.  

Side note:  I guess the reason they're all in the same building is so production could put cameras all over their apartment.  I felt uncomfortable watching Amber wailing like that, I know she signed up for a reality show and was probably told there would be cameras in the apartment, but I still felt bad that her family and friends had to witness her meltdown.

Elizabeth and Jamie don't want kids. They both lied during intake about wanting them, which speaks to your point about the show only viewing marriage a certain way. I love parenthood but I don't think it's necessary to have children to be a productive citizen or even to have a healthy marriage. I find it especially interesting and sad that Elizabeth's parents don't know she's not interested in having kids. They claim to be so close and she supposedly speaks her mind. It's a shame she feels she has to lie. 

Amber raised a valid concern about Matt being afraid to be attached to the mother of his child for the rest of his life. Even if you want a less traditional marriage, if you don't want to be attached to someone for the rest of your life, then why get married at all? I just don't understand that. 

[topanga]

3 hours ago, love2lovebadtv said:

Amber raised a valid concern about Matt being afraid to be attached to the mother of his child for the rest of his life. Even if you want a less traditional marriage, if you don't want to be attached to someone for the rest of your life, then why get married at all? I just don't understand that. 

I'm sure he was talking about having a crazy Baby Mama. As a basketball player, I'm sure he's seen plenty of his teammates have run ins with their crazy Baby Mamas. And it doesn't go away. 

So it was pretty cruel of him to tell Amber he's worried about having that same situation with her. Which he would. Totally.

AMBER: "I've called you 10 times already. You said you were bringing diapers for the baby at 2. It's 2:05. Why don't you want to see us? Why don't you love your child?"

MATT: "Well, um, I... I was hanging with my boys, and uh... I didn't even think about it. It's crazy, you know?" 

AMBER: "No, I don't know. I want you to come home!!!! Wahhhhhhhhh!"

MATT: "Oh, man..."

[Ohwell]

If (and that's a big if) Jamie and Elizabeth stay together, I really hope that they stick to not having children because I'd hate to see any kid being raised in such a toxic environment with those two.  They are both nasty people.

[Retired at last]

I think the reason that this season is so boring to me is that we already know most of the stories.

Amber and Matt - she will cling and he will continue to be thoughtless and she even may want to stay married, but they will not stay together. 

Big Red and Jamie - they will continue to have Caucasian sexy time until decision day and then they will split. They are too mean and nasty and selfish. I hope he gets the dogs.

Iris and Keith - they will continue to not have sex and Iris' rules for life will continue to have Keith being polite, but they will not make it past D Day. Or past the reunion and they still won't have had sex if they last that long.

Deonna and Greg - they are the only ones who may make progress. If she continues to warm up and let herself have some fun, they actually may be OK. We just don't see that side of her enough and I don't think she was a good pick for the show since she doesn't know how to be in a relationship, much less a marriage.