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S04.E07: All Hail the Queen


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The Sirocco braces for its most exclusive charter guest yet -- the Queen of Versailles; Joao faces old demons after a drunken night out as well as an increasingly defiant deck crew; a new third stew joins the boat.

Airs July 15, 2019.

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The “queen” of Versailles lives in a mansion that looks like a sty. Saw the doc and the place was gaudy and disgustingly filthy. I’m sure she’ll be a unhappy guest. I’ve found that ppl who don’t care about the state of their own home are verrry critical when in someone else’s territory. 

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Not all that much going on but I still enjoyed it.  The Queen is a pain in the ass but certainly not the worst guest ever.  I do think she's trying to screw with the crew. 

The blowups?  WTF.

I'm reserving judgement on June.

I can't believe Hannah and Aesha agreed to a date.

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(edited)

I just heard Captain Sandy call the primary, Jackie Siegel, philanthropic.  After I watched the Queen of Versailles, I would have to call them scammers.  Their company would try to coax tourists into buying timeshares, luring them in with free Disney tickets etc.  Around the time of the movie they just about lost everything, which is why they never finished that ridiculous house.  Don’t know how they made their money back.  One of her daughters died of a drug overdose and now she’s trying to do speaking engagements about addiction.  And yes as another poster wrote, their home was full of dog poop and dead roaches.  One of the housekeepers asked if she could sleep in the children’s outdoor playhouse, and she did!

I hate when Hannah talks about men as being cute puppies to fool around with.

Edited by Emmeline
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42 minutes ago, nytonc said:

The “queen” of Versailles lives in a mansion that looks like a sty. Saw the doc and the place was gaudy and disgustingly filthy. I’m sure she’ll be a unhappy guest. I’ve found that ppl who don’t care about the state of their own home are verrry critical when in someone else’s territory. 

I saw the documentary too.  I'm sure she is not used to the finest cuisine.  They lived like slobs in a mansion and the scene was shocking.  

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I was hoping Joao would’ve sent Jack on a milk run 30 minutes before charter and “forgot” him there. Speaking of deck hands Travis couldn’t possibly be upset because he was told by his boss to stop destroying property. Aesha your behavior at the club was not cool sis. The queen and her family seem to be a bunch of trashy loud mouths. I see trouble on the horizon for June and Hannah.

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(edited)
13 minutes ago, spunky said:

Along with Jack

If I was Joao, Jack would have been long gone. He’s adorable but lazy af. 

If the “queen” is exhausted climbing the stairs on the yacht, she’s going to die trying to to make the climb to Eze. 

Edited by nytonc
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4 minutes ago, nytonc said:

For once I agree with Hannah. There’s something strange about the new stew. 

I thought there was an odd emphasis on how she was eating the cake then asking about lunch-then a scene of vomiting.  Eating disorder?

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5 minutes ago, nytonc said:

If I was Joao, Jack would have been long gone. He’s adorable but lazy af. 

He would have been leaving before Mila. Seems like Travis has issues too.

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1 minute ago, tranquilidade said:

I thought there was an odd emphasis on how she was eating the cake then asking about lunch-then a scene of vomiting.  Eating disorder?

OMG That tape of her eating the cake was fucking chilling. I was wondering why we got such a Lifetime Movie looking cake eating scene. I was wondering why Meredith Baxter Birney popped up in my head.

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This one time where a forgotten item isn't Hannah's fault. Hannah went through a run through with Aesha asking if the items were packed. Aesha nodded yes the cutlery was packed. And then when Hannah isn't johnny on the spot in answering her radio, it's because Sandy told them al, to go swimming. I'm sure Sandy will find a way to make it all Hannah's fault.

On WWHL, Aesha said that Joao had been hitting on her too. The moment she indicated that she wasn't interested was the moment he started calling her a whore. Same Joao. Different season. I don't know why Med seems to cast so many misogynists.

New girl is an author.

https://www.kirkusreviews.com/book-reviews/june-n-foster/the-girl-and-the-golden-leaf/

https://www.junenfoster.com/about-the-author

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(edited)

I've never had a boss ask me if I had a boyfriend right out of the gate. That was weird. 

Joao is still a misogynistic ass. 

The reaction from Aesha when Jack asked her out was so genuine and cute. 

Anastasia's  food looks delicious. I'm not much of a lamb person, but that meal looked amazing. 

Jackie Siegel may have money, but she's trash. She's like Kim Zolciak but with way more money. Her home had dog poop everywhere, and her fav thing to do was to roll up to McDonalds drive thru in a limo. 

Did anyone catch was Aesha said about her Mom being judged for?  I couldn't understand what she said.

Edited by Barbara Please
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53 minutes ago, Barbara Please said:

I've never had a boss ask me if I had a boyfriend right out of the gate. That was weird. 

Joao is still a misogynistic ass. 

The reaction from Aesha when Jack asked her out was so genuine and cute. 

Anastasia's  food looks delicious. I'm not much of a lamb person, but that meal looked amazing. 

Jackie Siegel may have money, but she's trash. She's like Kim Zolciak but with way more money. Her home had dog poop everywhere, and her fav thing to do was to roll up to McDonalds drive thru in a limo. 

Did anyone catch was Aesha said about her Mom being judged for?  I couldn't understand what she said.

I watched again and still couldn’t figure out what Aesha was saying at all!

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1 hour ago, Barbara Please said:

Jackie Siegel may have money, but she's trash. She's like Kim Zolciak but with way more money. Her home had dog poop everywhere, and her fav thing to do was to roll up to McDonalds drive thru in a limo.

Something about deciding to quit IBM, becoming a model, and then marrying her husband seems to have shaken a screw lose. Jackie's a computer engineer who worked at IBM. At some point, she decided to say fuck it. I think all of the emphasis on her body and not her brains did not do good things for her cognitive capacity. 

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Did anyone catch was Aesha said about her Mom being judged for?  I couldn't understand what she said.

32 minutes ago, FairyDusted said:

I watched again and still couldn’t figure out what Aesha was saying at all!

Her mom was an addict. Her mom is clean now.

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8 hours ago, HunterHunted said:

On WWHL, Aesha said that Joao had been hitting on her too. The moment she indicated that she wasn't interested was the moment he started calling her a whore. Same Joao. Different season. I don't know why Med seems to cast so many misogynists.

I think he was attracted to her at first, but was turned off by her over sexualization of almost everything. Judging from his Instagram, he seems to like women with silent confidence as opposed to the Aeshas of the world.

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It seems pretty obvious that they are setting up a bulimia storyline with June.  She probably only had like one piece of cake, but they made it seem like she was secretly binge eating for hours with all the repeating footage and creepy lighting. 

The Queen of Versailles needs a bra fitting. 

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Why can’t they store a couple of foldable pull carts on board or borrow them from the marinas when they have outings like this? It’s ridiculous to have to carry folding chairs up to these locations and there are always locations like this.

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11 hours ago, nytonc said:

For once I agree with Hannah. There’s something strange about the new stew. 

It seemed like she alternated between being high and just plain not that smart.

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10 hours ago, FairyDusted said:

Thing I loved....Chef Ana going into town for local finds.

They had crew dining announced prior episodes so why are they not feeding the crew now? You can't expect them to work with no fuel.   

I was wondering about that as well.  The boats/ships I've worked on (not charter yachts) have different meal schedules when at the dock versus at sea.  Usually at the dock, there's an abbreviated breakfast, a lunch, then no dinner served.  I wonder if these boats do something similar.  Crew fends for themselves when the boat's tied up.

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Eze has a lot of pricey restaurants with views.  Not sure why they are lugging up a picnic of paninis.  I’m not even sure where they’d find space to set up tables and chairs.  There isn’t a lot of space, especially public space.  There’s a botanical garden up there at the top with cacti and views of the sea but they wouldn’t set up there unless Bravo is paying them money.

That cake eating footage they made it appear she ate the whole thing.  They probably burn calories doing long hours of essentially physical labor.  They better feed them.

As for all the crew getting cross with each other, it’s inevitable, liquor them up for a few hours between grueling work, they get some fireworks.  Especially when disagreements from work build up.

What else is new on Bravo?

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(edited)

There were a few shots of food on the table in the crew mess and no one else complained about being hungry so June either didn’t see it or didn’t realize it was an eat as you can situation. 

Edited by biakbiak
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3 hours ago, Mr. Minor said:

I hate when Hannah talks. Jackoff is not cute, he's just a lazy AF wanker!

I listen to the Watch What Crappens podcast (it is hilarious!) and they do a great Hannah impression of her calling people "honey" -- "hunnnnayyyyyy!"

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14 hours ago, nytonc said:

The “queen” of Versailles lives in a mansion that looks like a sty. Saw the doc and the place was gaudy and disgustingly filthy. I’m sure she’ll be a unhappy guest. I’ve found that ppl who don’t care about the state of their own home are verrry critical when in someone else’s territory. 

It WAS gross!  I remember a scene with a giant dead cockroach near a bathroom or something and no one did anything about it.  

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21 minutes ago, Natalie68 said:

It WAS gross!  I remember a scene with a giant dead cockroach near a bathroom or something and no one did anything about it.  

and one of the dogs was playing and/or trying to eat it.

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14 hours ago, nytonc said:

The “queen” of Versailles lives in a mansion that looks like a sty. Saw the doc and the place was gaudy and disgustingly filthy. I’m sure she’ll be a unhappy guest. I’ve found that ppl who don’t care about the state of their own home are verrry critical when in someone else’s territory. 

I watched this a few times. I felt like a rubber necker because I couldn't believe what I what I was watching.

Remember the chameleon? The "Queen" decides to feed it a piece of ham. She nudges it with the ham and realizes that it died from starvation.

I think the "Queen" accidentally ran over their dog. and basically had the dog skinned and now lays on top of the piano or a piece of gaudy furniture. They had their other dog is stuffed in a glass box.

If you haven't seen the documentary... You should watch it.

And I love Aesha. She is just so happy. I want to be that happy.

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Thinking about it more, I really doubt the guests asked for a picnic on top of Eze.

There are plenty of high end restaurants, with stupendous views, up there.

So the producers wanted it, put it in their pref sheet.

Maybe it was just the views or maybe to stress the crew having to take all that stuff up there, then of course forgetting cutlery.

They could probably borrow or buy cutlery from a restaurant or a hotel up there.

But they just want to take a shot of the guests at the table up there, probably don't care if they eat that picnic meal.

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(edited)
11 hours ago, spunky said:

I think he was attracted to her at first, but was turned off by her over sexualization of almost everything. Judging from his Instagram, he seems to like women with silent confidence as opposed to the Aeshas of the world.

I'm sorry, but if he's claiming this, it is bullshit. Aesha has been been gross, scatological, and over sexualized a ton on and off the boat. Joao had every opportunity to reveal his distaste in a much more calm nuanced manner. We've seen Sandy turn away in disgust to things Aesha has said. We've seen Hannah do the same and somewhat jokingly call Aesha "a dirty bitch." Joao has never done that. There were so many times he could have said she was gross because Aesha is super gross. He could have done that and kept his distance. He hasn't done that because his issue with Aesha isn't about that. The moment Aesha starts grinding on a dude who isn't him, Joao calls her a slut and a whore. First of all, it was just dancing. Secondly, who cares if a woman likes to have sex with different partners. As long as she's not putting herself in danger or hurting anyone, it should be cool.

Joao is a misogynist and he hasn't changed. Aesha talks about sex and poop, but so far we've yet to hear any stories of orgies or indiscriminant sex. On their nights out, we haven't seen Aesha hooking up with randos. Joao is calling her a slut and a whore despite having no evidence that she is. She has talked about sex in the abstract, not in any specific personal way. But somehow, Joao is sooooooooo scandalized by her grinding on a dude who isn't him, Jack, that she she's a slut and a whore. I see who he is. He might be doing his best to keep Jezabob aka Joao van der Sloot under wraps, but he's the same abusive misogynist that he's always been. He hasn't changed at all.

Let's not forget how he dealt with his female crew last season. Hannah, who I don't really like, speaks her mind and he calls her slut, whore, and a c***. He does this straight out of the gate. Kasey tells him that she's practically a virgin and he's salivating, but she starts speaking her mind and his dick mostly loses interest. Brooke is an insecure needy mess and Joao is in love. He barely talks to stealth smoke show Jamie and when he does it's only to condescend. Joao isn't into quiet reserved women. He's into bitches who won't talk back to him and that's almost how he'd likely phrase it too.

7 hours ago, scrb said:

Thinking about it more, I really doubt the guests asked for a picnic on top of Eze.

There are plenty of high end restaurants, with stupendous views, up there.

So the producers wanted it, put it in their pref sheet.

Maybe it was just the views or maybe to stress the crew having to take all that stuff up there, then of course forgetting cutlery.

They could probably borrow or buy cutlery from a restaurant or a hotel up there.

But they just want to take a shot of the guests at the table up there, probably don't care if they eat that picnic meal.

This is how you know what is and isn't produced. Even if the guests legitimately requested a picnic at the top of Eze, there's no way on a real charter that the crew would go ashore without at least 100 Euros from petty cash to buy anything that they might have forgotten.

Edited by HunterHunted
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13 minutes ago, HunterHunted said:

crew would go ashore without at least 100 Euros from petty cash to buy anything that they might have forgotten.

I imagine that they do have money and that will be the solution what we saw was only a few minutes of them seeing it was there. They kept cutting back to the boat but they weren’t actually trying to contact anyone there.

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1 hour ago, Thisgirllovespasta said:

I watched this a few times. I felt like a rubber necker because I couldn't believe what I what I was watching.

Remember the chameleon? The "Queen" decides to feed it a piece of ham. She nudges it with the ham and realizes that it died from starvation.

I think the "Queen" accidentally ran over their dog. and basically had the dog skinned and now lays on top of the piano or a piece of gaudy furniture. They had their other dog is stuffed in a glass box.

If you haven't seen the documentary... You should watch it.

And I love Aesha. She is just so happy. I want to be that happy.

I remember being nauseated with the stuffed dogs - big pigs is what they are. Wasn't the husband a big outlet mall developer or something ?  

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2 minutes ago, Mahamid Frauded Me said:

I remember being nauseated with the stuffed dogs - big pigs is what they are. Wasn't the husband a big outlet mall developer or something ?  

He develops and sells timeshare resorts and condos.

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6 hours ago, Mr. Minor said:

I hate when Hannah talks. Jackoff is not cute, he's just a lazy AF wanker!

When Hannah mentioned a guy being like a puppy to fool around with she was talking about Travis, not Jack. It's still a dumb comment but I took it more as he's someone to have a fling with rather than a relationship.

As for Jack I just completely hate him at this point. It's not bad enough he's lazy and tries to get out of work, he's arrogant and proud of the fact. And he does that thing of trying to gaslight other people into thinking they're just uncool drones if they take issue with his lack of work ethic. Hate.

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There are a lot of things to dislike about Hannah, but I can't believe how little professional self-control she has in earshot of the guests.  It seems like she is constantly walking away from serving dinner or drinks and making some snarky comment about the guests within just a few feet of the guests. 

The guests seem to like her, though, so I guess it's either just loud enough for her body mic to pick up, or else maybe they dub it in later?

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