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S23.E10: The Women Tell All

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Twenty of the most unforgettable women this season will return to confront each other and Colton and offer the lowdown on their quarrels and personal hostilities as they battled to capture Colton's heart.

Airs March 5, 2019.

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Have it on in the background while doing other stuff in case something juicy happens.

"The Mesnick" crying over the railing...classic!

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1 minute ago, Meowwww said:

MAKE THEM STOP ALL TALKING AT ONCE.  Ugh.  My ears hurt. 

Oh. My. God. I hope Harrison gets better control over this gaggle of harpies, or I’m not going to make it another hour and a half. Doesn’t help that I only remember about 5 of these girls total, so I don’t know—or care—what the hell they’re shrieking about.

Can we go back to the Heartbreak Memory Lane? That was total Wrong Reasons glory.

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My mute button is getting a workout.  I hate it when people all talk at once.  Colton has to be relieved he didn't want any of them.

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Who is this Jane chick and how much is Cailyn paying her to pimp her for B'ette? 

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I unashamedly love Demi.  (Hated her at first, she grew on me).

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Sick of the Demi show.  I’d be on Courtney’s side if she had a better weave.  She’s cute. 

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I just got home from dinner*.  Who's the chick in the front row in black?  She's got saggier boobs than my 69-year-old flabby self.

*Dirty rice and crawfish bites; Fat Tuesday rocks!

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1 minute ago, Mabinogia said:

Who is this Jane chick and how much is Cailyn paying her to pimp her for B'ette? 

I don’t think there’s any way to prove that 40% of these women were actually on The Bachelor. I mean, there’s videotape (or whatever they call digital recordings nowadays), but even with a frame-by-frame comparison, there’s no way I would be able to recognize these people.

If I were in the audience, I think my t-shirt would read “Demi-goddess” or maybe “Cassie is indefencible” (purposeful misspelling).

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1 minute ago, JenE4 said:

I don’t think there’s any way to prove that 40% of these women were actually on The Bachelor.

Even with the video evidence I'm not convinced that half these women were pulled from the audience line, thrown in some Fredericks of Hollywood gown and told to just sit there and yell a lot. No way these chicks were on this season. I spent half the intro going "who's that...who is she...was she on this...OMG I remember that one!" I got really excited when they finally got to one I remembered. 

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I don't love the Survivor reunion shows, but at least the players in the back only speak when spoken too.  

I  with the women in the back row would shut up.  I don't remember them, and why are they chiming ( shrieking) in, when it has nothing to do with them.   Some of the things they are talking about happened, when some of these women weren't even there, but they think they need to add to the confrontation.  

Courtney's pacifier stunt fell flat.  Talk about immature.  

Love Demi.  

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Who the fuck is Jane and her saggy ass old cougar tits? 

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Colton must the the single cleanest human being on the planet. Does he do anything other than shower? 

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They’re making a big deal of Nicole and her crying.  

I barely remember her. 

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Demi's laugh sounds like Elmer Fudd on a juicer

(shout out to Seinfeld)

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Demi’s way too proud to have the personality she has . You’re loud and outspoken . We get it . Stop reminding us with your arms in the air every second . 

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1 minute ago, Meowwww said:

They’re making a big deal of Nicole and her crying.  

I barely remember her. 

I only remember one scene with her. I definitely don’t recall a season of crying. They’re obviously only giving her couch time because they’re hoping to make her the next Ashley I in Paradise...as evidenced by the fact that Harrison invoked thr name of Ashley I while inviting her to the couch. 

Huh?!? What is happening with this in-show ice cream commercial?

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This ice cream commercial is probably going to be the highlight of this episode, and I'm kind of okay with that. I thought giving Colton ice cream in the shower was funny. I think my standards start getting really low once they start going to two episodes a week.

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Colton is a virgin at 27. He has been flirting with a gay porn star online and his workout friends are gay actors. He picked the girl who didn't want him so he could remain single and wouldn't have to propose. I know we are supposed to buy into the fairytale but all signs point to Colton being gay.

...ducks for cover......

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1 minute ago, Armchair Critic said:

Colton is a virgin at 27. He has been flirting with a gay porn star online and his workout friends are gay actors. He picked the girl who didn't want him so he could remain single and wouldn't have to propose. I know we are supposed to buy into the fairytale but all signs point to Colton being gay.

...ducks for cover......

Ok, you piqued my interest with the flirting with a gay porn star! Screen shots or links or articles or something?

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Did Hannah's pageant teeth get even bigger than they were before?  Good lord, her mouth looks like Boltin' Colton's fence.

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9 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

Ok, you piqued my interest with the flirting with a gay porn star! 

Colton Haynes is the guy

Edited by Armchair Critic
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I can’t help but like Demi. I think it’s funny that she gives no fucks because honestly this show and these fake people are barely tolerable anymore.  Yes Courtney you’re the height of maturity and grace what with your decision to be part of this shit show. She’s just an attention whore like the rest of them. 

Also my Croatian girl Nina is looking boobalicious once again!

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3 minutes ago, talktoomuch said:

Awww I like that big toothed Hannah Beast...

She’s very charming. 

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Oh lord. They're going to make me sit through Cailyn to get to the bloopers. Is this something I can just catch on youtube, cause I don't think I can deal with her. 

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I will say, that was a great B'ette audition Hannah Beast just gave. Demi is a lock for Paradise. I think they'll send the crying girl there too, wow, already forgot who she is. So I think it's down to Hannah B and Cailyn. OMG I hope they don't do a double again, like they did with Britt and whatserface who ended up with Shawn for a while. But the Battle of the Beauty Queens totally seems like something this shit show would do. 

I'm so sorry for putting that out into the universe. Forgive me. 

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I think Caelynn's most upset about seeing how greasy and shiny she looked when she got dumped.  Couldn't she have done an allover Kleenex blot when she spiffed up her lip gloss?

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I cannot listen to Hannah B’s vocal fry for an entire season so I hope they don’t make her the bachelorette. They’re trying to make her interesting but she couldn’t carry a show. She can’t even do a toast. 

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I think that I would much rather see Hannah B as Bachelorette.  She's much less polished and I think she would be fun.  But she can't freeze up during conversations like the date with Colton.  I'm not sure if she's a good enough actress for the gig.

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Harrison needs a ref whistle to shut those girls up when they all talk over each other.

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Just starting. Brie is stunning. 

There was a Jane??

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1 minute ago, nutty1 said:

Just starting. Brie is stunning. 

There was a Jane??

There was a Brie?  😜

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I loved Ali’s Frank!!!!

Brooks and Des. That one got to me. 

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3 minutes ago, Meowwww said:

There was a Brie?  😜

Brie is the Uma Thurman looking model.  Jane is the saggy tits Caitlyn cheerleader.  

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What's with Colton's cold eyes tonight?   He gave no solace to Caelynn, I mean, he didn't even try.      

Edited by hyacinth
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Do did redhead Elyse peace out of the whole shebang after Colton let her walk out?  She was my girl crush for a few episodes...I miss seeing her.

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1 minute ago, Marmiarmo said:

Do did redhead Elyse peace out of the whole shebang after Colton let her walk out?  She was my girl crush for a few episodes...I miss seeing her.

I think I read she had a wedding that was a previous commitment. 

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1 minute ago, hyacinth said:

What's with Colton's cold eyes tonight?   He gave no solace to Caelynn, I mean, he didn't even try.      

She’s Cassie’s best friend so he was probably ready to bolt again . 

I never really find Colton too good looking but I think he looks hot tonight . That haircut /lack of hair gel is working for him 

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Caelynn should not have injected her face full of filler before this tell all. It’s so obvious with the side by sides of her from the season and tonight. Her face is twice the size it normally is. Between the filler, the overdone eyebrows and the too light hair she looks even more plastic and rubbery than usual.

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Does Demi know what promiscuous means? Good God. Who would announce this about themselves??

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4 minutes ago, Jaclyn88 said:

She’s Cassie’s best friend so he was probably ready to bolt again . 

I never really find Colton too good looking but I think he looks hot tonight . That haircut /lack of hair gel is working for him 

I think he lost some weight; he's less chipmunk-cheeked.

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