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Tidying Up With Marie Kondo - General Discussion


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We loved Clean Sweep. My kids were young, but when cleaning out their toys, clothes, etc. it was keep, toss donate in 30 minutes.  I can’t wait-and discovered the show’s existence through this forum-Thanks!

Now to get my husband to watch with me ... 🤔

Edited by chitowngirl
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I may have missed it on this site, but what channel/streaming service will be showing this?

I'm very curious to watch this show.  The book is a bit over the top, but really makes you think about your things and letting objects go.

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18 hours ago, Token said:

I might even renew my Netflix subscription for this.  But only if the episodes are all released at once, not once a week.

I read somewhere that all 8 episodes will be released on January 1st.

Which is great — I can get all gung-ho about decluttering January 1st and then forget all about it on January 2nd.

Edited by link417
Damn iPhone, it’s not “hung-ho”
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I've been using the Konmari method of folding for a couple years now and it really is the greatest thing ever. The show is adorable; Marie and Iida are so fun to watch. So far I think I've watched five episodes; the last I finished was with the younger gay couple.

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It's just okay, she repeats herself over and over again, and I would like to see all her folding tricks in one episode myself. I was not super impressed, but did watch all the episodes because I love anything about organizing. I wish she spoke English.

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Does it matter which order you watch them in?  Because I started with the 2 writers, since I could relate to the books, papers and electronics in the description.  

I thought it was kind of boring.  Too much talking into the camera and not enough interaction and hands-on with MK.  Also, I wanted to see what Frank actually kept of his papers (especially the Power Rangers fan fiction - hah!) and how he stored them.  

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7 minutes ago, tessaray said:

 

Does it matter which order you watch them in?  Because I started with the 2 writers, since I could relate to the books, papers and electronics in the description.  

 

Nope. Though the only real thing I got out of the three I watched was her folding technique which was in the first episode.

I think it’s the producers fault this show is boring. She is engaging when she is on screen but either because of the language barrier or that her techniques are simple, and basic though useful a lot of the burden falls onto the homeowners and they aren’t particularly interesting. 

Edited by biakbiak
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Pick out the episodes you want, it makes no difference....I didn't want to watch a toddler episode so I didn't....it's pretty good.....they could have done more with her, that is what upsets me. She's a little doll.  Why do people think they are going to eventually fit into clothes...FOLKS IT IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN! Toss it. Hoarders kill me. 

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Watched the 1st 2 episodes and that will be it for me. Marie is a doll, but there just isn't enough. I used to like Peter Walsh when he was on Oprah. Very hands-on and active helping the people.

The mom who hated doing laundry ... did I miss something or did they never really get to the root cause of that? I'm pretty sure I saw at least 2 washers. 1 in the garage and 1 just beyond the kitchen.  I'd rather do the laundry and outsource true cleaning.  What exactly was dad doing? Does he understand how hard it is to be at home with 2 toddlers/pre-schoolers?

The same with the dishes. Did they have a dishwasher?  (I'm guessing no.) One suggestion I would have is to buy some compostable paper plates to use for breakfast and lunch until you could get a handle on the complete kitchen re-org and come up with a system for doing the dishes. Any help you can find, you have to take advantage of!  Simple tricks that I use: find a dish soap that you love with a great scent, and also a favorite sponge (I like the Sponge Daddy). Listen to music or a podcast as you wash. Maybe reduce the number of sippy cups that you have.

I'm not going to be judgy about the "boobies", but when the child was nursing it looked like she was in the center of her mom's chest, unless at that point she was sleeping.

If I were Marie, I would have said "Your family room is beautiful and not cluttered at all. How do you keep it that way?"

2nd couple of Japanese descent - they needed more tough love, I think. Did anyone notice how when the wife was talking about "retail therapy" she said something like "I hit him in the wallet".  If I were the kids I'd be saying, "Mom and Dad, we love you, but we don't want most of this stuff. We can't tell what is valuable and what isn't since there is so much stuff. Unless you want it all thrown out one day, you should go through your things."  With that much stuff and clutter, you know that the house isn't clean.

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The boobies thing disturbed me.  I know some moms nurse for a really long time.  But that kid was too big and had too extensive a vocabulary to still be breastfeeding.  If your kid can clearly articulate a full sentence, including use of the word boobies, then she's too old to be breastfeeding.

The show itself didn't impress me.  I think there was only one episode, the musical/hair family, that didn't annoy me.  Love, love, love Marie Kondo and what she does, but I don't know that she has enough screen presence to pull off a TV show.  

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I thought I would enjoy it but I didn’t. People like this are just so ridiculous to me. The first mom has two kids, two! Not five or six, two - and she’s so overwhelmed she can’t do her own laundry? Most of these people probably need mental health therapy to get to the real root of their issues. Tidying up won’t help you in the long run when you can’t even manage to do your own dishes or laundry. 

Also, for the life of me, I just don’t understand people’s need to have so much stuff and junk. I don’t get it. 

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On 1/1/2019 at 6:27 PM, biakbiak said:

The wife in the first episode, Rachel, used to be on Bravo’s show The People’s Couch.

OMG yes I was trying to place her!  She was the one with the two other sisters and the dad, right? miss that show

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Quote

 What the hell was she doing? 

Totally fair question. Marie should have asked about her daily and weekly routines. I think parents and kids both benefit from structure and routine.  Pre-school, going to the park, playtime, lunch, naptime/quiet time, etc.  And for mom, putting a load of laundry in, at least once a day!

As for dad, even if he is working 50 - 60 hours a week, I would hope that he spends at least one hour a day with the kids, perhaps at bathtime and/or bedtime. That would give mom a chance to do the dishes.

Bottom line for me though, is that if you absolutely hate doing something, AND you have enough money to pay someone to do it, go ahead and pay someone. Isn't that cheaper than going to counseling or to a divorce attorney?  

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27 minutes ago, Janc said:

OMG yes I was trying to place her!  She was the one with the two other sisters and the dad, right? miss that show

Yep the Resnick’s! I too miss that show so much! 

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4 minutes ago, biakbiak said:

Yep the Resnick’s! I too miss that show so much! 

I miss that show too! But my annoyance with the mom on the first episode is making sense now because I could not stand those sisters. I liked the dad though.

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I read Marie Kondo's first book a few years ago, and was interested to see how it would translate to tv. I watched the first 2 episodes. Meh. My problems with the book are the same problems I have with the tv show. In the book she swears that if you just follow her steps, everything in your life will be better, and you'll never go back to your old ways. But she doesn't entirely articulate how, and kind of the same thing happened here. Mom went from hating laundry to being okay with doing it now? Besides that lady giving away a ton of her clothes, are we just to assume she wouldn't go out and buy more now? There seemed to be some steps missing along the way.

I also think part of the problem is that there doesn't seem to be much resistance on the part of the homeowners. (maybe that changes in future episodes?) I guess I'd like to see more struggle in giving away so much stuff. I realize part of this show is selling the KondoMari method, so perhaps they want it to appear "easy." But if you read her book, it's a lot more extreme than they portray on the show. Things like only keep 1 out of every 10 photos, and leave NOTHING on the counter, including your dish sponge or toothbrush. (I notice folks had lots of things on the counter in the after pictures - ha!) Marie Kondo seems very sweet and well-intentioned. But honestly when I read her book I came away thinking she was kind of strange. I think the show would be a lot more interesting if it played up some of the extreme aspects of her methods.

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1 hour ago, atlantaloves said:

Oh man, can I just say that the "babe" couple will be divorced within two years. He can't stand her.  (and we can't either) And what is it with breast feeding a child who speaks in more complete sentences than you do Mrs. Babe?

Because in the parenting Olympics, if you breast feed, baby wear, and co-sleep, you've won. Just wait until their hormones kick in, babe. (No disrespect to anyone who does those things, but you just know she's "that mom" that out-moms all the moms)

Edited by tobeannounced
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I have decided she isn’t for me, except for maybe the folding technique and gathering all your clothes in one spot to go through them. The reason I would gather all the clothes is not to see if I find joy in them but to see if their are duplicates or holes in my wardrobe that I don’t notice. However, she did inspire me to do that. 

When I saw she is not for me I mean as in following her philosophy, I think she seems absolutely delightful. 

Edited by biakbiak
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I totally agree.....that clothes method truly does work, and has FOR YEARS AND YEARS for anybody that does it, but I am not thanking my ugly old clothes for their service I can tell you that.  They were not in the military. Snort.  I just wish I could part with some of my fabulous cocktail clothes, I keep thinking I will have a place wear them again one of these days.  

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I'm in the middle of the second episode right now. I'm trying to understand what it means to have three generations' worth of stuff in a house. I mean, I get it...but on the other hand it's just Too. Much. SHIT. I believe the son said something about he and his siblings not wanting all that stuff? No kidding. I wonder if the dad was able to find some valuable baseball cards in that collection though.

The first episode? Mannn...I don't have kids so I'm not going to pretend to understand what it's like to have two kids under the age of 5. That said...I agree with whoever said they needed to pay for a housekeeper instead of a laundry person.

In both episodes, I kept thinking it's a good thing they live in CA because they must not need to store their cars inside a garage.

Why do people have so much SHIT?? (I can't even watch Hoarders; it makes me ill.)

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One thing I found funny and is probably because I watch a lot of HGTV is how dated most of the houses and furnishings were and it was more pronounced during the reveals because all the reveal showed was more of the dated furniture and finishings. 

This isn’t a criticism of the homeowners it just reminded me how much a lot of tv shows are in a bubble making you think everyone has updated their houses.

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On 1/3/2019 at 12:09 PM, oldCJ said:

 

Also, the way she kept shutting down her husband with “babe” gave me cringy flashbacks to The Office “Dinner Party”.

I had the same thought!! It made me wonder if they were actually doing that as a bit...

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On 1/2/2019 at 8:24 PM, tobeannounced said:

Working 50 to 60 hours a week. What the hell was she doing? She's a SAHM with two kids and has to hire someone to do laundry? And, yes, I was a SAHM with two kids who was not the greatest housekeeper, but damn, girl, buck up and do the basics for your family. Because you know she has a housekeeper as well. If your kids are running you that ragged, you need to start teaching them how to play independently.

ETA: @MoreCoffeePlease, I hope you don't think my vitriol was geared towards you. That mom just really bugged me, and I had to vent.

She’s not only a SAHM, she teaches world communications, despite the fact that she seems confused about English grammar (“Kevin and I’s relationship?!?! From a teacher, no less. Side rant: would you invite someone to dinner at I’s (sic) house, or offer to lend someone I’s (sic) shoes?  Of course not!  Using a compound phrase does not change the rules of grammar. NEVER!  Stupid grammar mistakes annoy me, and I embark on a fruitless journey of calling people out on the internet.  I’m a troll, but one who enjoys cathartic typing.). Hearing such a simple mistake from a COMMUNICATIONS teacher is as disturbing as seeing an accountant add 10 to 90 and write down 1000.  

Otherwise, I thought the house looked great at the end of the show.

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I've only watched the first episode so far, and while Marie seems very sweet and delightful, I honestly didn't think that the Friend family's house was in all that bad of shape, to the point where they would need to hire an outside consultant to help them tidy up and organize (although I realize the primary motivation in this case was to be part of a TV show). Their living room looked fine, the kids' play room wasn't even all that messy, and the main issue just seemed to be Rachel's dislike of doing laundry (for which she already has someone hired to help)? Basically all they did was a spring cleaning and throwing out of old clothes and toys. I just didn't get the idea that tidying up their house was really going to be all that life changing for this family, since it didn't seem like there was that big of a change beyond emptying out the closets and organizing the kitchen drawers.

I agree that an episode focused on Marie and her KonMari method, would have been a better choice for the first episode, especially for those of us who haven't read her book (I've heard of her previously through news articles but haven't had a chance to read the entire book yet). That said, I can see the value in using "spark joy" (or similar) as a criterion for whether you need to keep something or not, but that nonsense of saying "thank you" to every t-shirt you throw in the goodwill bin is ridiculous.

Edited by ombelico
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59 minutes ago, atlantaloves said:

Her herpes lips bothered me even more than her horrible grammar. Every 10 minutes her lips had more rot on them....oh the stress of laundry! 

Thank you!  I'd forgotten about all the sores she had!  At first I thought they were moles or something, but they increased as the show went on.  They were gross.

40 minutes ago, ombelico said:

I've only watched the first episode so far, and while Marie seems very sweet and delightful, I honestly didn't think that the Friend family's house was in all that bad of shape, to the point where they would need to hire an outside consultant to help them tidy up and organize (although I realize the primary motivation in this case was to be part of a TV show). Their living room looked fine, the kids' play room wasn't even all that messy, and the main issue just seemed to be Rachel's dislike of doing laundry (for which she already has someone hired to help)? Basically all they did was a spring cleaning and throwing out of old clothes and toys. I just didn't get the idea that tidying up their house was really going to be all that life changing for this family, since it didn't seem like there was that big of a change beyond emptying out the closets and organizing the kitchen drawers.

I agree that an episode focused on Marie and her KonMari method, would have been a better choice for the first episode, especially for those of us who haven't read her book (I've heard of her previously through news articles but haven't had a chance to read the entire book yet). That said, I can see the value in using "spark joy" (or similar) as a criterion for whether you need to keep something or not, but that nonsense of saying "thank you" to every t-shirt you throw in the goodwill bin is ridiculous.

I don't know.... I just Marie Kondo'ed my kitchen and I did that with the things I got rid of.  It actually helped me take a moment to pause and reflect on why I bought the item in the first place and how I clearly never needed it.  I think it will help me in the future to take that moment to pause and reflect on why I own something, why I bought it, and why I don't need to buy things in the future.

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I've only seen the first three.  I think the theme overall is that getting organized is a family affair.  Each couple seems surprised to find that they enjoy working together on the problem, and I like that aspect.  I felt the most empathy for the African-American family (very loving family), having to exist in a 2 bedroom apartment.  I'm not sure why they downsized like that at that point in their lives, but I was glad to see them all realize that the Mom was carrying all the responsibility for everything.  As for the hoarding family in episode 2, progress was definitely made, but the real problems were left unaddressed.  I think when they inherited that house, it was already filled with crap they were expected to keep.  They never really made it their home and it still isn't, but they are closer.  Marie never addressed their kitchen, did she?  I guess that place was just too overwhelming.  I think they got to the point of "good enough, we're tired" and called it a success, when it was really just a start.  

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Woo boy, where to begin. I will admit at the outset that I’m not a Marie Kondo fan. I get that she’s helped thousands of people but I’m not one of them. I began decluttering and minimizing a year ago (probably got rid of close to 80% of my belongings, useless, duplicate, never used or worn-out stuff, and I couldn’t be happier) and when I started the process I did a lot of reading. Her book was one of the first—I listened to the audiobook and the narrator was one of the best I’ve ever heard—and my main takeaway was that she needed help, stat. Throwing away her family members’ possessions without their permission? Spending recess inside the classroom tidying up the supply closet rather than join her classmates on the playground? TEARING PAGES OUT OF BOOKS AND THROWING THEM OUT?!? That’s not normal, that’s obsessive. I was still interested in checking out the show, if only to see her process in real life. Three episodes in and I’m still not a fan. For one thing, if she’s on-screen for 10 minutes total, that’s a lot. She giggles, drops a couple of little airy-fairy comments about sparking joy and thanking your stuff, giggles some more and then disappears only to pop back in a couple of times, still giggling, to discover that putting junk in little boxes and following her folding method has saved a marriage, kept the kids from a life of drugs and debauchery and possibly cured cancer. It’s way too simplistic and free of substance. She never seems to address the emotional aspects of decluttering (I remember Peter Walsh on Clean Sweep and how he would gently confront people and get them to realize that getting rid of things didn’t mean getting rid of the memories and meaning behind them). But even if she did try to address those things, the language barrier would be a huge impediment. It’s not easy opening up the emotional floodgates when you’re filtering it through a translator. The biggest no for me though, was that in the end, the afters didn’t look much different from the befores. Yes, the people did get rid of a lot but even so, they ended up just organizing their still-overwhelming clutter, which is kind of a no-no in decluttering/minimizing circles. Yes, she’s non-threatening, cute and adorable, hopping around and giggling like a pre-teen, and I get that a lot of people respond to that approach but she’s not for me. I got far more out of Fumio Sasaki’s “Goodbye Things” than I ever could from Marie Kondo. Of course, YMMV. :D

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I've watched a few more episodes, and I have to agree with a previous poster who said the main issue with this show is that it's mostly about people I really don't care to get to know so well. I wanted to hear about Marie Kondo and her techniques. And the three visits with their three separate greetings is just twee and annoying after a while. Cut to the chase.

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I enjoyed most of the episodes. I read the Kondo books and like them. There are a couple extreme / unrelatable recommendations in those books e.g. I can not put everything in a neat box or home. The philosophy of evaluating your items, being grateful for them, and then either keeping for your future or discarding them is a good one. I think it emphasizes that items are important and it can help curb consumption. The more you buy, the less value there is on the things you already have. The Atlantic's article reflects most of my thoughts on the show.

I watched the show out of order and a couple of the families were annoying especially the first episode with the Friends. They really shouldn't have started with that one.

10 hours ago, BetyBee said:

I felt the most empathy for the African-American family (very loving family), having to exist in a 2 bedroom apartment.  I'm not sure why they downsized like that at that point in their lives, but I was glad to see them all realize that the Mom was carrying all the responsibility for everything. 

I think this was my favourite family too. Everyone including the kids were lovely. Katrina the mother discussed how limiting their opportunities in Michigan had become especially with regard to the husband's work as a musician.

The show would have worked better if Netflix had an extra or whole episode with Marie folding and discussing how to organize specific things. There was not enough Marie or Iida. Understandably, the show is about helping the clients discover things for themselves, but maybe a bit more Marie would help. I'm in it if Netflix decides to renew and continue which given their current crunch, they may not.

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6 hours ago, Margo Leadbetter said:

Her book was one of the first—I listened to the audiobook and the narrator was one of the best I’ve ever heard—and my main takeaway was that she needed help, stat. Throwing away her family members’ possessions without their permission? Spending recess inside the classroom tidying up the supply closet rather than join her classmates on the playground? TEARING PAGES OUT OF BOOKS AND THROWING THEM OUT?!? That’s not normal, that’s obsessive. I was still interested in checking out the show, if only to see her process in real life. Three episodes in and I’m still not a fan. For one thing, if she’s on-screen for 10 minutes total, that’s a lot. She giggles, drops a couple of little airy-fairy comments about sparking joy and thanking your stuff, giggles some more and then disappears only to pop back in a couple of times, still giggling, to discover that putting junk in little boxes and following her folding method has saved a marriage, kept the kids from a life of drugs and debauchery and possibly cured cancer. It’s way too simplistic and free of substance. She never seems to address the emotional aspects of decluttering (I remember Peter Walsh on Clean Sweep and how he would gently confront people and get them to realize that getting rid of things didn’t mean getting rid of the memories and meaning behind them).

Yes to all of this! My thoughts exactly. I think Peter Walsh's tough love approach was much more translatable to the screen.

One of the more crazy suggestions from that book that I forgot about until my friend reminded me last night: when you come home every day, empty out your purse or bag so it can "rest" for the night. And put all the shit in your bag away, out of sight. So then you can load it all again the next morning ??? That would add like 10 minutes to my morning routine, and I'm already usually running late. No thanks. I wonder how many of these folks did that. 

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Well, now I feel kind of bad because after poking around on Rachel Friend's Instagram, it appears one of her children is special needs, which makes the being overwhelmed with two kids make more sense. I don't think they addressed that in the episode. I didn't catch it if they did. Maybe they should have. Wonder if she's depressed.

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