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Bethenny & Jason: The Divorce Showdown


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Bethenny was filming a promotion for her own cocktail on that Tenjune bar which had agreed to sell Bethenny's cocktails, so there was definitely a big difference between Bethenny and Jason , Bethenny had a cocktail line, books ready to pop and had finished her third season of a reality show, way different from a pharm sale who lived in a minuscule apartment and barely making it.

Just because Jason was living in a "miniscule" apartment, doesn't mean he was barely making it or not doing well, at least not in the NYC market. It's entirely possible that his apartment was worth a pretty penny depending on the location. Plus, was it a condo or co-op? If a co-op, even the most lenient boards require a solid financial cushion for the priveledge of buying into them. All I'm saying, is that in the NYC market, a small apartment does not indicate a lack of funds.

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Just because Jason was living in a "miniscule" apartment, doesn't mean he was barely making it or not doing well, at least not in the NYC market.

 

I think the running argument has always been whether or not Bethenny was making significantly more money than Jason when they met, and when they married.

 

Bethenny was, like it or not, the break out star of RHONY. She wasn't poor before the show, she was probably right where Jason was, making enough money to get by in NYC and to appear to have an upper class lifestyle publically, while returning to the miniscule apartment at night. But with the show, and the opportunities coming from the show, by the time she met Jason, her money position had already been seriously enhanced. (Even Simon and Alex, in season two and three, seemed to have had a better financial position than season one, the show itself was providing income)

 

Jason wasn't even close to making what she was when they met, and seemed to drop his own career to attach to hers pretty quick. If his career was so rewarding, financially or otherwise, why was he so quick to drop it? Now, by any reasonable standard, I don't think Jason was dirt poor or anything like that when he met Bethenny (in part because I don't think Bethenny would have ever entertained a blue collar truck driver sort of guy, or anyone with a minimal income) but can we at least agree that Jason wasn't making as much as Bethenny when they met? And that there was some disparity between their income?

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but can we at least agree that Jason wasn't making as much as Bethenny when they met? And that there was some disparity between their income?

Without seeing W2's, I'm not going to assume anything. I have no idea who was making what nor do I care. My only point was, as hard as it is for people outside the NYC metro district to understand (and some of us in it!), small apartments do not equal cheap apartments. That's all. My point had nothing to do with what they were making because I just don't know. My comment was to make an observation on the wonky nature of the market for NYC apartments. But I do agree with her making more money from the show and her book by the time she met Jason. Didn't she buy an apartment before she met him? I seem to remember Jill wanting to show off her "expertise" in renovating apartments on one of the episodes.

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I think the running argument has always been whether or not Bethenny was making significantly more money than Jason when they met, and when they married.

 

Bethenny was, like it or not, the break out star of RHONY. She wasn't poor before the show, she was probably right where Jason was, making enough money to get by in NYC and to appear to have an upper class lifestyle publically, while returning to the miniscule apartment at night. But with the show, and the opportunities coming from the show, by the time she met Jason, her money position had already been seriously enhanced. (Even Simon and Alex, in season two and three, seemed to have had a better financial position than season one, the show itself was providing income)

 

Jason wasn't even close to making what she was when they met, and seemed to drop his own career to attach to hers pretty quick. If his career was so rewarding, financially or otherwise, why was he so quick to drop it? Now, by any reasonable standard, I don't think Jason was dirt poor or anything like that when he met Bethenny (in part because I don't think Bethenny would have ever entertained a blue collar truck driver sort of guy, or anyone with a minimal income) but can we at least agree that Jason wasn't making as much as Bethenny when they met? And that there was some disparity between their income?

I think their incomes were probably pretty close.  According to Alex the first season they cleared minimum wage.  By the second season she would have been lucky to be making $100,000.00 from the show.  There were expenses relates to Bethenny's career-she seems to have always had an assistant.  When Jason met Bethenny she did not own a residence, didn't even own a car.  IIRC Jason did own his apartment.  Her storyline Season 2 is she was staying with Jill (in the Hamptons) to save on paying for a summer rental.

 

Jason really wasn't quick to drop his career-he was around Bethenny for three years before he made the jump to work full time for her and that lasted all of what a year before she filed for divorce.  One could maintain from the time he began appearing on Bethenny's spin-offs he either was or should have been being paid.  He was a pretty integral part of the shows.

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Jason has never stopped working or left his job to work for Bethenny, he still continues working for the same company he has worked for the last 15 years, the last year his schedule obviously has become much more relaxed probably due to the fact that he stands to make more money out of the divorce than from his pharm sales.

Bethenny did offered him to quit his job to work for her but he couldn't make up his mind for the whole BEA season 2 , it wasn't until the end of the show that he finally made up his mind and told her in no uncertain terms that he wasn't working for her, that he would never be her employee and he was going to continue with his job.

I am not sure where this rumor (myth) comes from because Jason was clear about not working for her. He went to his job and later in the afternoon he would work with the contractors of the apartment, which is something else he was mediocre at, but as far as working for Bethenny he never did. I remember his constant complains to her that she was working on what she loved to do and that is why she exceled at it, so Bethenny told him that he needed to find his passion so he could be happy as well, but Jason wasn't having it, she offered him to take time off from work to find his passion (at her expense) and he refused, she offered him that he would fund a company for him, that would be his with whatever he wanted to do and again he wasn't sure what that would be, finally he made his intentions clear IMO when she offered him to make him her CEO of all her ventures (minus SGC because that was sold already) and he refused because he didn't want to work for her, he wanted to be his equal (meaning make me your partner with stock shares probably) and Bethenny told him that whether he liked it or not , even as her CEO he still would have to report to her, he declined and they ended the season with the clear understanding that he would continue with his job.

There are plenty of scenes during all seasons with Jason coming from his job or going to work, there is absolutely no evidence that he ever worked for her, furthermore I remember another blog where one of the posters who worked in the same pharm company said that Jason was still working there and has worked there for many years. Like many sales people they do not have to be in an office all the time, they have plenty of time during the day while going from one client to the other to walk around the city and be seen, even to stop at home, their schedule is flexible. Unless Jason quit his job after the separation came about there is absolutely no evidence that he ever quit his job for her or that he ever worked for her.

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 But I do agree with her making more money from the show and her book by the time she met Jason. Didn't she buy an apartment before she met him? I seem to remember Jill wanting to show off her "expertise" in renovating apartments on one of the episodes.

The apartment she looked at with Jill (Cher called. She wants her outfit back) was one that she and Jason1 were looking to buy  together.  Beth talked about having 3 bedrooms so when they had his kids over, they'd have rooms.  Jason1's kids were luckier than they know to have dodged that bullet.

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Bethenny sharing the stage with four other opinionated women who have more seniority than she?  LOLOL.  Whoopi will KICK HER ASS.

 

From the article:

The source added that Frankel is “very interested in getting back on TV. It is the only job that she really knows.

Wait.  She's been a food chef/cook/chook, cocktail creator,  author, undergarment maker, work-out video star, poser for naked billboards, beauty product developer, restaurant hostess and a chauffeur/nanny.  I think she even shoveled horse shit for a while.  I feel like I'm missing something. 

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Please. No. Why does she need another paying job? Doesn't she have enough money to last her a lifetime? Why doesn't she start another business, start a Foundation, volunteer, or best yet, JUST GO AWAY. Then again, she would fit in beautifully with the current crop of screeching harpies.

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How about just be a mom to her daughter for awhile.  You know the kid that she is fighting so hard over?  The one whose life just got turned upside down, who could use a little stability for awhile?  

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I think their incomes were probably pretty close.  According to Alex the first season they cleared minimum wage.  By the second season she would have been lucky to be making $100,000.00 from the show.  There were expenses relates to Bethenny's career-she seems to have always had an assistant.  When Jason met Bethenny she did not own a residence, didn't even own a car.  IIRC Jason did own his apartment.  Her storyline Season 2 is she was staying with Jill (in the Hamptons) to save on paying for a summer rental.

 

Jason really wasn't quick to drop his career-he was around Bethenny for three years before he made the jump to work full time for her and that lasted all of what a year before she filed for divorce.  One could maintain from the time he began appearing on Bethenny's spin-offs he either was or should have been being paid.  He was a pretty integral part of the shows.

 

There are no records of any properties own, bought or sold by any Jason Hoppy in the whole state of NY or PA, his name of a simple record search only goes back to the apartment in Tribeca , that is only because Bethenny was dumb enough to put his name on the deed, but NY is not a community property state so I assume it would be fairly easy for Bethany to prove that the chunk of the down payments for the apartment (2.3M IIRC) came from her funds and not from his. He was also very clear about his not having a penny to put towards this apartment.

 

Bethenny lived in a much better apartment than Jason when they started dating, she no longer had her single bedroom apartment from season 1, she had moved to her much more spacious apartment, the one that had an office for SGM headquarters, so Jason never met the poor, single bedroom apartment of season 1, he met the lady with a cocktail already in production and with two books, one ready to be released and another one in the editing process and also the lady who had finished filming season 2 of RHNY. I find very telling that the beginning of their relationship officially was marked by a trip to be beautiful island of Turks and Caicos with promotional tickets given to Bethenny, that IMO dispels any doubts about them being on an equal level when it comes to incomes. Jason would have never been able to afford a trip to that paradise and even when Bethenny didn't have to spend her own money to go the fact was that Jason was able to enjoy the fruits of her labor since early on.

 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/bethenny-frankel/a-luxury-experience_b_210419.html

 

I also find very telling that Jason had the need to portray himself as a real state mogul just because he collected the rent of a couple of apartments for a friend , that was obviously a lie with short legs and from early on he was called "fake" but he was charming so I am sure that Bethenny as everybody else ignored the obvious red flags.

 

http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2009/07/27/ny-housewife-bethenny-frankel-sued-fiance-fake/

 

 

"The engagement is fake," said our inside snitch, adding that in "reality" Hoppy is a medical sales rep/personal trainer, not a "property guru."

In the United States, real estate licenses are issued by the state where a person does business. While Hoppy's address is in New York, Pop Tarts has learned that he is not licensed as a sales person or broker in NY.

 

 

The engagement was fake as they never got engaged until October of 2009 but his real state background was as fake as his portrayal of the perfect BF/husband,

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What a lovely sentiment, that in a marriage, the partner earning less is a 'stupid' addition to the deed of the property they share and where they raise their daughter.  Of course I'm using the language of 'they' and 'their,' instead of the approved Saint Bethenny language of (all) 'hers.'

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(edited)

There are no records of any properties own, bought or sold by any Jason Hoppy in the whole state of NY or PA, his name of a simple record search only goes back to the apartment in Tribeca , that is only because Bethenny was dumb enough to put his name on the deed, but NY is not a community property state so I assume it would be fairly easy for Bethany to prove that the chunk of the down payments for the apartment (2.3M IIRC) came from her funds and not from his. He was also very clear about his not having a penny to put towards this apartment.

 

Bethenny lived in a much better apartment than Jason when they started dating, she no longer had her single bedroom apartment from season 1, she had moved to her much more spacious apartment, the one that had an office for SGM headquarters, so Jason never met the poor, single bedroom apartment of season 1, he met the lady with a cocktail already in production and with two books, one ready to be released and another one in the editing process and also the lady who had finished filming season 2 of RHNY. I find very telling that the beginning of their relationship officially was marked by a trip to be beautiful island of Turks and Caicos with promotional tickets given to Bethenny, that IMO dispels any doubts about them being on an equal level when it comes to incomes. Jason would have never been able to afford a trip to that paradise and even when Bethenny didn't have to spend her own money to go the fact was that Jason was able to enjoy the fruits of her labor since early on.

 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/bethenny-frankel/a-luxury-experience_b_210419.html

 

I also find very telling that Jason had the need to portray himself as a real state mogul just because he collected the rent of a couple of apartments for a friend , that was obviously a lie with short legs and from early on he was called "fake" but he was charming so I am sure that Bethenny as everybody else ignored the obvious red flags.

 

http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2009/07/27/ny-housewife-bethenny-frankel-sued-fiance-fake/

 

 

The engagement was fake as they never got engaged until October of 2009 but his real state background was as fake as his portrayal of the perfect BF/husband,

Actually, if you do a search there are several documents for Jason Hoppy:

 

http://a836-acris.nyc.gov/DS/DocumentSearch/PartyName

 

Those property filings start before they bought the condo.  I don't ever recall Jason portraying himself as real estate mongul and that foxnews link doesn't even make sense. 

 

Also, I thought Bethenny moved to the new apartment (not the condo they bought after they got married) in Tribeca after she met Jason.

Edited by breezy424
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Actually, if you do a search there are several documents for Jason Hoppy:

 

http://a836-acris.nyc.gov/DS/DocumentSearch/PartyName

 

Those property filings start before they bought the condo.  I don't ever recall Jason portraying himself as real estate mongul and that foxnews link doesn't even make sense. 

 

Also, I thought Bethenny moved to the new apartment (not the condo they bought after they got married) in Tribeca after she met Jason.

 

Jason moved in to Bethenny's second apartment, he never even met her when she had the single bedroom apartment , Jason was only there for the move of the second apartment to the Tribeca apartment.

 

Not sure how you do that search because still nothing come up with his name.

 

IMO it is a stupid decision to put a deed in both names when you have used only your money for the down payment. Luckily for Bethenny NY will consider the proof of where the money came from and it would be fairly easy for her to prove that it came from her accounts and not his.  

 

Division of properties is nothing but cumbersome, if Bethenny had lived in CA it wouldn't have matter how much each of them put out of their pocket, the fact that both names were in the deed would have made them split it evenly, meaning she will have had to buy him off and pay him half of the down payment for him to leave, which would have been funny considering he never put a penny towards it.

 

Prenups are legal documents and are written for a reason, they are written to protects the wealthy partner , you do not see a person with no assets trying to get a prenup , love is a lovely concept but with the divorce rate at +50% in this country it is wise to protect your patrimony. Is it part of the romantic fairytale? of course not but neither are divorces yet they still happen every day at an alarming rate.

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I find it very telling that the beginning of their relationship officially was marked by a trip to be (sic) beautiful island of Turks and Caicos with promotional tickets given to Bethenny, that IMO dispels any doubts about them being on an equal level when it comes to incomes.  Jason would have never been able to afford to that paradise and even when Bethenny didn't have to spend her own money to go the fact was that Jason was able to enjoy of the labor since early on.

I am not sure one person being given a promotional trip proves anything about how much money one makes or that they make more money than the other. It just means they got a trip for two gratis.  What was Bethenny promoting?   I am sure Jason and Bethenny were relieved he didn't have to listen to the vacation time share presentation that comes as a requirement to so many promotional trips. 

 

All I recall about this trip is Jill was mad that Bethenny chose to take Jason instead of her.

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Jason moved in to Bethenny's second apartment, he never even met her when she had the single bedroom apartment , Jason was only there for the move of the second apartment to the Tribeca apartment.

 

Not sure how you do that search because still nothing come up with his name.

 

IMO it is a stupid decision to put a deed in both names when you have used only your money for the down payment. Luckily for Bethenny NY will consider the proof of where the money came from and it would be fairly easy for her to prove that it came from her accounts and not his.  

 

Division of properties is nothing but cumbersome, if Bethenny had lived in CA it wouldn't have matter how much each of them put out of their pocket, the fact that both names were in the deed would have made them split it evenly, meaning she will have had to buy him off and pay him half of the down payment for him to leave, which would have been funny considering he never put a penny towards it.

 

Prenups are legal documents and are written for a reason, they are written to protects the wealthy partner , you do not see a person with no assets trying to get a prenup , love is a lovely concept but with the divorce rate at +50% in this country it is wise to protect your patrimony. Is it part of the romantic fairytale? of course not but neither are divorces yet they still happen every day at an alarming rate.

I just put in Jason Hoppy.  There are ten documents for three different properties.   None of them are for the condo he and Bethenny bought.  There are no documents for Bethenny which tells me the condo was bought under a LLC or other company name.  So from that, I don't know if, in fact, the deed is in both or one of their names.

 

We also don't know what is in dispute as far as the divorce settlement.  There's just a lot of tabloid rumors with no facts.

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Actually, if you do a search there are several documents for Jason Hoppy:

 

http://a836-acris.nyc.gov/DS/DocumentSearch/PartyName

 

Those property filings start before they bought the condo.  I don't ever recall Jason portraying himself as real estate mongul and that foxnews link doesn't even make sense. 

 

Also, I thought Bethenny moved to the new apartment (not the condo they bought after they got married) in Tribeca after she met Jason.

I don't recall Jason portraying him as a real estate mogul either....that's really a ridiculous claim

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I find very telling that the beginning of their relationship officially was marked by a trip to be beautiful island of Turks and Caicos with promotional tickets given to Bethenny, that IMO dispels any doubts about them being on an equal level when it comes to incomes. Jason would have never been able to afford a trip to that paradise and even when Bethenny didn't have to spend her own money to go the fact was that Jason was able to enjoy the fruits of her labor since early on.

The first year of my job in NYC  I was able to go to Turks & Caicos. It's not unreasonably expensive. Just go to www.travelzoo.com and you'll get a great rate on any of the islands. But then again, Bethenney got her trip free so that she could advertise it in the Huffington Post. A shrewd move on her part, but in no way does it mean that Jason couldn't have afforded the trip on his own. I mean, heck, if I could afford it, then so can just about anyone with a job.

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Please. No. Why does she need another paying job? Doesn't she have enough money to last her a lifetime? Why doesn't she start another business, start a Foundation, volunteer, or best yet, JUST GO AWAY. Then again, she would fit in beautifully with the current crop of screeching harpies.

I think she sees this as visibility for her Skinny Girl contract that ties incentive bonuses to her continued promotion of the brand. Its in her best interest for the cocktail line as well as her other products that tie to that image.

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Also, I thought Bethenny moved to the new apartment (not the condo they bought after they got married) in Tribeca after she met Jason.

I maybe misremembering but I recall the scene where Bethenny reads on Perez Hilton that she is pregnant and Jason comes over to talk about it. That was in her first apartment. I also recall them packing up to move and getting in the skinny girl car and driving away.

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(edited)

I am not sure one person being given a promotional trip proves anything about how much money one makes or that they make more money than the other. It just means they got a trip for two gratis.  What was Bethenny promoting?   I am sure Jason and Bethenny were relieved he didn't have to listen to the vacation time share presentation that comes as a requirement to so many promotional trips. 

 

All I recall about this trip is Jill was mad that Bethenny chose to take Jason instead of her.

When I was in college, broke as hell, I was top telemarketer where I worked.  I won a luxury 10-day cruise for 2. I could hardly pay my rent.  I gave the trip to my parents because I couldn't afford to take time off from work.

The first year of my job in NYC  I was able to go to Turks & Caicos. It's not unreasonably expensive. Just go to www.travelzoo.com and you'll get a great rate on any of the islands. But then again, Bethenney got her trip free so that she could advertise it in the Huffington Post. A shrewd move on her part, but in no way does it mean that Jason couldn't have afforded the trip on his own. I mean, heck, if I could afford it, then so can just about anyone with a job.

travelzoo.com  IS THE BEST !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Edited by beesknees
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(edited)
IMO it is a stupid decision to put a deed in both names when you have used only your money for the down payment. Luckily for Bethenny NY will consider the proof of where the money came from and it would be fairly easy for her to prove that it came from her accounts and not his.

 

 

Were they only dating at this point? Because then I could agree with you. Maybe.

 

But if they're engaged or married? Then no, it's not stupid.  It's called marriage.  That's how it works - us v. I and whatnot.

Edited by felicity porter
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(edited)

My friend's husband is a lawyer and he put his non-working wife's names only on their home's deed because he didn't want the house subject to his partnership's liability.  

 

But the Tribeca apartment doesn't have Jason's name on it at all right?  It is in some corporation's name with Bethenny's assistant named as president of the corporation.  Yeah that sounds legal tax wise.

Edited by jinjer
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I wonder about Julie too. She seemed to put her heart and fell just short of her soul too into Bethenny and the Skinny Girl endeavors. I always thought Julie and Jason made for a better match and at least it seemed like Julie liked him. I can't even imagine how tough and stressful her job was.

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I would love to know what Julie ( former assistant) thinks about the divorce situation .

 

I am not sure what she thinks about it and Julie is professional enough not to give the press any fodder.

 

I do know that they keep ion contact and that Julie still does some promotional gigs for Bethenny (per Julie's own tweets) so they are still working together in some way. Julie did spend the whole weekend with Bethenny and Bryn in a rental in the Hamptons a couple of weeks ago. BTW Julie is pregnant.  

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I remember many a times seeing Julie, Brynn and Jason and thinking they made for  a better family unit than Jason, Brynn and Bethenny. Julie looked so stressed towards the end of her time working with B. and as I recall, in her talking heads, Bethenny basically said that Julie was leaving because she couldn't handling things anymore (as opposed to wanting to be with her boyfriend). It just seemed like a bitter dig rather than a boss wishing someone in her former employ all the best. But I know the employer/employee relationship can be complicated and we didn't see all of it, so who knows.

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I remember many a times seeing Julie, Brynn and Jason and thinking they made for  a better family unit than Jason, Brynn and Bethenny. Julie looked so stressed towards the end of her time working with B. and as I recall, in her talking heads, Bethenny basically said that Julie was leaving because she couldn't handling things anymore (as opposed to wanting to be with her boyfriend). It just seemed like a bitter dig rather than a boss wishing someone in her former employ all the best. But I know the employer/employee relationship can be complicated and we didn't see all of it, so who knows.

I don't think anyone who worked for Bethenny would last long....not easy working for such a self-involved, selfish woman

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Julie and Bethenny are still friends and Julie still does some marketing for her. At least that is how it appears on social media. So, I don't think they have any resentment or issues with each other. 

guess Julie has the "right stuff" to deal with Bethenny

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IMO Julie started working for Bethenny when Bethenny was on her beginning stages and Julie was hungry just as much as Bethenny was, they made a perfect team, but as Bethenny grew bigger and bigger and the demands were increasingly more demanding of time and mental energy Julie started to resent her work, not Bethenny, but just the complicated schedule, being a PA is a very hard and consuming job, with Julie being ready to settle and start a new family and her BF being from Pittsburg Julie soon realized that the combination of her professional life as it was and her emotional life were not going to combine very well and she found herself at cross roads. Her heart was pulling her in one direction and her professional ambitions in another and that was making her miserable . Julie herself said that she was torn apart, she had been through so much with Bethenny, she had been there to see the little seed grow into a beautiful flower (her company) and now that it was time to reap the rewards she would have to part ways. I saw Bethenny step back and give her enough room to make up her own mind and I also noticed that Bethenny realized that Julie was going in other direction and when the conversation between both happened and Julie told her about her decision to leave Bethenny was supportive of that decision.  They have maintained a relationship despite being apart and they still work together in some capacity and spend time together so I have no doubt that they have switch their relationship from merely professional to personal with no problem.

 

For all we know Julie still maintains the same friendly relationship with Jason, but evidence points to the fact that Julie and Bethenny are very good friends. It seems to me that Bethenny has a very close circle of friends (not the JZ kind but real life long friends) and once you are in, you are in and Julie is now part of that circle.

 

The only assistant that she had problems with was that guy Max and mainly because he was lazy and entitled but her other ones, the one before Julie (she is the person whose name is on the LLC for her apartment -- that to me indicates a very close relationship), then Julie who she still is friends with and now Jackie who is still working for her after 3 years so her track record regarding PAs is a good one, IMO

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Not sure where else this would go but I was in Central Park in June waiting for tickets to Shakespeare in the Park and I swear Jason walked by with a brunette and two little girls. I assume one of them was Brynn. I didn't pay enough attention to Bethanny's spin-offs to recognize her. 

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How about just be a mom to her daughter for awhile. You know the kid that she is fighting so hard over? The one whose life just got turned upside down, who could use a little stability for awhile?

Oh she is being a mommy to her daughter. Didn't you see Beth's tweeted pic of herself wearing her daughters teensy pjs?

"When your 4 yr old daughter says 'mommy wear my dress you do'" lol yea right- most moms don't have a stick Nancy Reagan pez dispenser body and don't already start competing with toddler daughters, crazy lady, and no one believes that story to defend the pic, attention whore.

If she's going for school girl sexy it'd help if she didn't look like Quagmire in drag.

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(edited)

I don't think anyone who worked for Bethenny would last long....not easy working for such a self-involved, selfish woman

 

I was always so impressed by Julie's ability to stay with Bethenny through the years--giving up her weekends, nights, life, even B. admitted she expected Julie to be a round-the-clock flunky with undefined hours and limits. I used to like Bethenny during the RHoNY period, but the mask came off on Bethenny Ever After (with her own choices as producer, so can't fault editing). I thought she showed her true colors when she sold SG for such a fortune and did not give Julie a HUGE bonus (it didn't seem as if she gave her -any- actually. You know she'd have told us if she did.) I'm thinking "a million" but at least enough for a house of her dreams back home and enough to live on comfortably for a year.  Bethenny was lucky to find someone so unselfish (And I think she did, again, with Jason). 

 

Because Julie believed in her and her business when she was a struggling nobody selling brownies and worked for free much of the time. That's the kind of thing that can make or break a struggling entrepreneur. Likewise, I thought Jason seemed very helpful for her "brand"--and showed a lot more managerial skill on BEA than she did (but she was too much the narcissistic control freak to let him do anything "better" than she did). 

 

As for Julie and Bethenny's "friendship", I think Juile knows B's temper--and that she has the money and lawyers to sue--and would do it--if there was ever anything said publicly that B. didn't like.

Edited by Padma
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It looks like the judge in the divorce case is not happy with Bett's clothing choices.

 

I wonder if this will figure in the final disposition of the case and have some bearing on the custody arrangements?

Since custody has already been established, I don't think the judge's opinion will have any impact. Since this was the judge's opinion that was not spoken directly to Bethenny, I say hallelujah! Because someone whose job is to determine the value of a person's assets should not have a say in what type of person or parent they are judging is, in my opinion.

 

At this point, what the judge has to say about Bethenny's clothing choices should have as much bearing as my opinion on  Bethenny as a person - none.

Edited by MatildaMoody
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The judge told her lawyer to tell her no more photos on her in kid clothes on social media.  Not that she couldn't wear kid clothes, just that she couldn't post them on social media.  They were in court at a hearing.  I would think that may be binding on Bethenny.

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Gesmer even said that her own concerned friends called when they heard about Frankel’s posting, in which she wrote, “This is my daughter’s night gown and PJ shorts. Think we’re ready to start sharing clothes yet?”

 

 

Wait, am I understanding the pronouns here? The judge's friends called the judge when they heard about Bethenny's IG post? Like, what in all the hell? What concern is it of theirs?

Edited by Mozelle
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I gotta weigh in here.  I preface that i lost track of B especially after her talk show ended.  I knew she was divorcing but that was about it.   I did watch BGM and BEA .  I cannot add any facts about their legal agreements etc. Apologies if I'm interrupting the flow of that convo but do want to talk abut what I saw in their marriage.

 

During BGM and BEA I was beginning to admire and relate to B although I admit I was still a little bit afraid of her.  When she got married to Jason I thought   "hey, she CAN share!'" {spotlight, success, feelings  etc.)  "She can accept and want an 'equal'.".  I guess up to that point I saw her as always competitive and always very .. um  'singular' --   not so much selfish (but that's part of it) but more like "I don't want/need your help,"   I never saw her as a "partnership" person. 

 

So this is some of what I saw in their marriage. As you will see I have a great deal of sympathy for Jason.  I can have selective memory so feel free to remind me if I'm forgetting something or missing a piece of the puzzle.

 

I saw B becoming more and more nervous and stonewalling as the SG brand took off.  Jason was dedicated to helping her but she was on the fence about really letting him partner in or becoming a bonafide employee.  That was a fact as I recall.  They both talked about the pros and cons of him coming on board. .  It seemed she wanted his feedback and support, but wasn't sure she wanted to make it official.

 

 I thought  "girl you are not all in on this marriage. You are already thinking about your assets ..'in case'."  This was not a little shit business he wanted in on for lack of his own talent and drive.  There was plenty of room for him and he would have been a true asset.  Frankly I think he saw the writing on the wall then.

 

Her Birthday party.  How rude and selfish could she be?  Hiding and crying in the bathroom.  She just had a wedding where she was the center of attention.    But now it's all too much and overwhelming.?  What a kick in the teeth to him, his parents, and friends. I cannot help but think her overall thought process is  "don't do anything for me, help me or care about me because I WILL -- sooner than later--DROP you and move on, and I don't want to look like a shit.  I don't want to "OWE" you ANYTHING..   .

 

She resented his 'normal, wholesome' family and his image of being 'normal' as well.  I could understand a bit of envy for that, but No ..it wasn't that.  She said over and over that it made her look bad.  (i'm tired of being the "crazy one'.  "you always look like the Good Guy")  She beat him with that stick constantly.   Gosh Bethenny, one would think you would be happy to have a family like that, especially for the sake of your daughter and after boo-hooing about the horror that your family was.  But no. .   I couldn't believe she had the balls to say out-loud and unabashedly that she resented him AND his family for being wholesome and normal and kind to her.   It was like water to the wicked witch.

 

 Bethenny was stingy with that baby.too.  ('this is MY baby..or child".. idk ) ..yeah she said that.  and "I don't want visit his parents in PA every other weekend " .  

 

I truly believe Jason's wrath is rooted in the disrespect and ingratitude Bethenny showed to his parents.  She shit all over everything they were and did.  She as much as told him WHILE they were married  that  'you and your family have nothing to offer me'. .  You are ruining my image and you will take my money.'    and he thought .."you know what? as always..You're right!"  

I agree with a lot of what you are saying here; I also watched BEA and a few times I wondered why Bethenny was being such a bitch. The Hoppys came across to me as two loving, desperately grief-stricken parents, doing their best to find some happy.  Jason, I thought, was a good son, who loved his parents, and was just doing his best in a devolving situation.  (I still think they are loving, grief-striken parents trying to find some joy and that Jason loves his parents a lot, btw)

 

But then I read some posts here and they made me rethink this. I realized that I was over-identifying with the Hoppys out of my own fear of the unbearable idea of losing a child and the deep sympathy I felt for them was clouding my judgment.  I think that Jason absolutely loves his parents, so much so that he's kind of taken responsibility for their feelings, which is, by definition, enmeshment. Understandable for sure, but still unhealthy.

 

I wholeheartedly agree that Jason's anger, to whatever  degree, is related to Bethenny's rejection of the Hoppy family, and her unwillingness to make one big Hoppy Family (i just slapped my own wrist for that). But I also think that his expectations that they schlep out to Hazelton every two weeks, when they have their own lives, an "empire" to run, a family to create and live in, were simply too much.  

 

As for Bethenny and my astonishment about her being such a bitch at times, well this forum has factored in there, too.  From what I have read here, Jason has shown himself to be passive aggressive (tv remote, giving baby hot dogs, underpants McGee, etc) and that made me understand why she said things like "you always appear to be the good guy" (paraphrasing), because that's what passive aggressive people do.  If she finds that annoying then she and I have that in common.

 

I like Bethenny but I can also see that she'd be a difficult person to be married to: she's an only child who grew up having to be the parent. That equals one giant "I call the shots" personality, and despite her efforts to work on her issues, she still seems to resort to a frantic, scared kid who needs to figure out what to do right-this-minute when she feels backed into a corner.  Overall, I think she's had a very raw deal in life, and I cut her a fair amount of slack for that.

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(edited)

A core problem is that they just didn't spend enough time together before Bethenny got pregnant and they got married. Had they spent more time getting to know each other Jason might have seen that Bethenny's problems go deep and she was/is not really working on them in a serious way. He possibly would have realized he couldn't handle her many issues, and she may have seen enough of his hidden negatives to call it off, although in her pre-SG multimillionaire state she seemed determined to be in a relationship and I think he looked like a great catch to her. The sudden pregnancy forced the marriage decision which might not have come for another year, unless behind the scenes Beth was pushing for a proposal. They no doubt were both horrified by what they became as the months went by. I think each is a decent-enough human being to not want to harm their daughter, though perhaps not mature or strong enough to avoid playing games in an effort to win more than they each deserve. (Jason = a great deal of B's money, Bethenny = full custody of Brynn)

 

Edited to add: I have a friend whose ex-husband was the type who could make himself look like the greatest guy to everyone else and then say horrible, cruel things to her when they were alone. When she finally got the courage to leave him, her own family couldn't believe she wanted out of "such a good marriage to a wonderful man" and that she would "wreck" her children's lives by leaving. She was dying inside and none of her friends or family could see what was going on so didn't give her much support. Because of this I won't give Jason the "good guy" pass wholeheartedly. There may be a reason he was drawn to someone as broken and driven as Bethenny obviously was and is.

Edited by RedHawk
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A core problem is that they just didn't spend enough time together before Bethenny got pregnant and they got married. Had they spent more time getting to know each other Jason might have seen that Bethenny's problems go deep and she was/is not really working on them in a serious way. He possibly would have realized he couldn't handle her many issues, and she may have enough of his hidden negatives to call it off, although in her pre-SG multimillionaire state she seemed determined to be in a relationship and I think he looked like a great catch to her. The sudden pregnancy forced the marriage decision which might not have come for another year, unless behind the scenes Beth was pushing for a proposal. They no doubt were both horrified by what they became as the months went by. I think each is a decent-enough human being to not want to harm their daughter, though perhaps not mature or strong enough to avoid playing games in an effort to win more than they each deserve. (Jason = a great deal of B's money, Bethenny = full custody of Brynn)

Exactly. They just didn't really know each other well enough before they got married. They never seemed compatible to me.  I have sympathy for a marriage gone wrong, but do roll my eyes a little bit more when the people were the ages they were when they married. These were not young kids who made a mistake, or even people innocent to the world around them. They were adults in their late 30's to early 40's who should have been smart enough to do a little more due diligence before they entered into a contract as serious as marriage, but thus this is just what happens in the world. They clearly had not worked out the most basic of issues involved in being married, such as the whole having the office in the home deal, or visiting the in-laws. There is zero chance in any conceivable world where I would take two weekends a month and spend them driving a few hours back and forth to visit my in-laws. Zero. And I am as close to my in-laws as a person can possibly be. The very idea makes me cringe, but more than that, the idea that my husband would think this was a good idea even if it was something that made me unhappy is just wrong IMO. They were just not made for each other and were both at fault for that. Now they just need to settle it so that they can move on. Beth can continue to be unhappy and suck at relationships as she surely will, and Jason can find someone who isn't offended/concerned/amazed by the request of dedicating half of their weekends to his family. 

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(edited)

If your husband saying you are "too damaged to be loved" is suddenly being equated with hyper-sensitivity, crazy-reactive attitudes and being "covered in buttons", then I suspect the majority of married women would qualify for that category, if faced with a similar statement. 

My original post was "I have a feeling that Bethy is covered in buttons."

When a poster responded that Bethy's husband had said she was too damaged to be loved, I took that as another button that she has and that he pushed.

I have my perceptions and the way she has acted in this season makes me feel she is covered with buttons.

Lu and another HW have said phrases to the effect not to go there with Bethy "when she is like that"  Bethy breaks down crying and says she would be on the floor sobbing if she had to talk about "it."

 Where did  "hyper-sensitivity and crazy reactive"  come from.   If you equate it to being  "covered in buttons" then that is your interpretation, I never gave my interpretation, nor was I asked.  IMO a strawman.

It does add drama to the debate, much like Dorinda and her Salem bonfire/nightsticks/billy clubs/hits/punches/etc. ;)

Edited by Crikey
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I like the phrase that Bethenny is "covered with buttons". Makes sense to me! She doesn't intend to be that way either, but apparently won't use any of her millions to get real off-screen therapy in order to remove some of them.

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(edited)

My original post was "I have a feeling that Bethy is covered in buttons."

When a poster responded that Bethy's husband had said she was too damaged to be loved, I took that as another button that she has and that he pushed.

 

 

 

This is the comment you responded to:

 

"I remember watching Jason coldly wait for Bethanny to melt down in tears after continuously referring to her as 'damaged'. And this is when they were at the 'good' phase of their marriage. When she was looking to him for any bit of praise, compliment anything, and he would refuse, I wanted to reach through and slap him. That's when I realized he probably never even loved her, or as he said "she's too damaged to be loved".  What a creep."

 

You replied with a statement indicating confirmation  ("So she IS covered in buttons"), but that statement proves nothing re: buttons, imo, as the majority of sane & emotionally stable married/committed women would feel devastated if their partners said that to them. Bethenny hoping for praise from her husband and being handed that shit  instead is not proof her of her having multiple buttons, it's proof her husband was (at least in that instance) a shithead for saying it at all (never mind more than once).  As well, many so called "damaged" women are not only able to be loved (and love deeply in return) they *are* loved.  So again -- not a button to react to something hurtful, and also untrue.

 

And if somebody actually IS covered in buttons -- not just one or two, but several, as you said -- they are, at the very least, hyper sensitive and crazy reactive, to multiple situations/triggers.  

 

ETA

 

Bethenny is the originator of the, "Bethenny is damaged,"  she and her shrink talked about it.  She said it to Jason.

 

And he used it against her -- if my husband did that to me, I wouldn't be reacting out of "button pushing" if I found that profoundly betraying, I'd be reacting to an actual betrayal. 

Edited by film noire
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(edited)

My original post was "I have a feeling that Bethy is covered in buttons."

When a poster responded that Bethy's husband had said she was too damaged to be loved, I took that as another button that she has and that he pushed.

I have my perceptions and the way she has acted in this season makes me feel she is covered with buttons.

Lu and another HW have said phrases to the effect not to go there with Bethy "when she is like that"  Bethy breaks down crying and says she would be on the floor sobbing if she had to talk about "it."

 Where did  "hyper-sensitivity and crazy reactive"  come from.   If you equate it to being  "covered in buttons" then that is your interpretation, I never gave my interpretation, nor was I asked.  

It does add drama to the debate, much like Dorinda and her Salem bonfire/nightsticks/billy clubs/hits/punches/etc. ;)

Bethenny is the originator of the, "Bethenny is damaged,"  she and her shrink talked about it.  She said it to Jason.  She has said in on TV, she has said   I never heard Jason say he was white trash but Bethenny threw that out there.  It is kind of like when Bethenny attacked Terry Dubrow for indicating she was skinny girl.  So Bethenny who has used the word skinny over and over all of sudden gets  spitting mad at this person she obviously knows nothing about.She claimed he was grabbing on to his wife's RH coattails.  Dubrow, had actually been on two previous reality shows and was in his second seasonof a successful E! show.  http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/bethenny-frankel-rips-terry-dubrow-after-weight-comments-fame-hungry-2015144 Bad temper and ill informed.

 

Much like her poor choice to disclose the details of their relationship.  http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2321365/Bethenny-Frankel-breaks-silence-brutal-split-Jason-Hoppy.html  No wonder the court ordered the parties to not discuss their relationship or each other with the media. 

 

One thing that has always bothered me about Bethenny story of her growing up is she talks about being five years old her stepfather dragging her mother down the hallway and striking her with a half moon shaped phone and then hearing them have sex.  First off, Bethenny  would have been five in 1975,  there were no cordless phones and certainly not any half moon shaped cordless phones, so that would mean he either ripped the phone out of the wall or perhaps the image is an amalgamation of various disputes between the two..  The other thing that bothered me- five year olds do not know what sex sounds are.   She may have heard her mother and step-father in the other room but as a five year old she would not be conscious of what sex noises were or what sex is.  I believe it is a conclusion she arrived at later or her mother told her.  So her having difficulty having sex with men because of what she saw is maybe an excuse.   When Bethenny recalls incidents I think she, like so many others, may have distorted memories.  The difference is most people, including celebrities don't find the need to talk about them and put them in a public forum.  Certainly one of Bethenny's many charms is to view a situation and put an exaggerated or humorous twist on it during her testimonials.  Maybe that is the defense mechanism she developed  as a result of a dysfunctional childhood.

Edited by zoeysmom
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I like the phrase that Bethenny is "covered with buttons". Makes sense to me! She doesn't intend to be that way either, but apparently won't use any of her millions to get real off-screen therapy in order to remove some of them.

I agree.

IMO the thing about having buttons or being covered in buttons is that you set yourself up by being vulnerable to anyone being able to find and push them.  Bethy seems to want to avoid those people (on a reality show, no less)  or demand they not push her buttons rather than removing her buttons herself.

She wants others change their behavior when it is  her responsibility to change.

And, no, I am not saying people should find and push her buttons but, even if she got rid of those who have done it, there will always be a new person to replace them.

I don't know if she has sought real help but, I will say, if she has she needs to ask for a refund.

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