Faux Life: Things That Happen On TV But Not In Reality

[kassygreene]

7 hours ago, Ceindreadh said:

Putting keys in a bowl near the front door is actually not a great idea. It can be possible for thieves to use a fishing rod through the letter box to hook the keys and either break in or steal a car. 

Where oh where oh where in this country does the post office still let the mailman go up to each door?  The slot would leak heat in winter, a/c in summer; the box on the porch hasn't been large enough or rain-proof enough ever, most houses now seem to be required to have a box on the street, and the push for centralized neighborhood boxes ain't ever going to end.

I want the keys in a bowl by the door but I'm overruled, because someone might see the keys through the glass front door, and break it to get the keys to my 1997 4-door compact or my mom's 2002 4-door midsize.  And the neighborhood association does such a marvelous job monitoring the length of our grass that I am confident they would detect and destroy any burglar.

[DittyDotDot]

8 minutes ago, kassygreene said:

And the neighborhood association does such a marvelous job monitoring the length of our grass that I am confident they would detect and destroy any burglar.

You should tell them to be on the lookout for suspicious folk wandering around with fishing rods ;)

[Bastet]

Quote

Where oh where oh where in this country does the post office still let the mailman go up to each door?

They do here in my L.A. suburb; letter carriers walk my neighborhood (and all the old neighborhoods in my city), as we have mail slots at the house, not the curb.  Mine drops down into a little chute inside the foyer closet; very convenient.  At my parents' house, the boxes are at the curb; I remember a good 30 years ago, my mom mentioned to the local post master that she wished they were at the house instead, and he said the USPS was looking at requiring everyone to put in a curbside box (to make it faster for letter carriers to complete their rounds, since they can just drive their way through the streets), but obviously that didn't happen.

Edited October 1, 2016 by Bastet

[Moose135]

Back home on Long Island, we all had mailboxes mounted near the front door, either on a post or on the house itself.

[Raja]

1 hour ago, kassygreene said:

Where oh where oh where in this country does the post office still let the mailman go up to each door?  The slot would leak heat in winter, a/c in summer; the box on the porch hasn't been large enough or rain-proof enough ever, most houses now seem to be required to have a box on the street, and the push for centralized neighborhood boxes ain't ever going to end.

 

City Letter Carrier hat on. Practically everywhere that door to door delivery was grandfathered into place decades ago and the congressional representatives office will jump on the local postmaster should she try to change and make you move the boxes. For new construction the mailboxes are located in a centralized area and should just a single house be remodeled the service is suppose to get the new box down at street level but many local managers don't.

[shapeshifter]

On September 30, 2016 at 8:46 AM, Popples said:

Seriously! I'm 32 and I feel like I went to school with an absurd number of girls named Kristen, Crystal, Christina, Kristy (with a ridiculous amount of different spellings for all of them), Jennifer, Jessica and Megan. I never realized until now that you don't hear those names on television that much anymore.

Aquarius (show this summer set in the late 60's) used one of today's most popular girl's name, Emma, for a main character who was not famous for being part of the Manson family, with whom she lives in the show. I thought that was an interesting use of an unrealistic name choice, but it seemed most of the viewers were just annoyed by the insertion of a fictional character into Manson lore, even though each episode began with a disclaimer that the show was a mix of fact and fiction. It might have helped if they had a voice (instead of just words briefly on the screen) like at the beginning of all the L&O shows. Anyway, someone I was talking to about this said Emma was at the bottom of the list of popular girl's names in the 50s and 60s. 

[atomationage]

48 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

Emma was at the bottom of the list of popular girl's names in the 50s and 60s. 

Except maybe if the mother was a Jane Austen fan.

[ChromaKelly]

14 hours ago, methodwriter85 said:

Oh, and Sam or Jo. We know a girl's meant to be a loveable tomboy with those names.

That's so when the male half of the duo learns his new partner is Charlie or Alex, he can be surprised when a woman shows up. "Hi, I'm Alex Lastname" "Oh! You're not what... I was expecting."

[kiddo82]

Or the girlfriend finds out that "Bobby from work" is actually Barbara.  She will always be annoyed and ask, "Why didn't you tell me your partner was a woman?"  At the same time she will insist she's not jealous.

[Shannon L.]

Quote

Where oh where oh where in this country does the post office still let the mailman go up to each door?  The slot would leak heat in winter, a/c in summer; the box on the porch hasn't been large enough or rain-proof enough ever, most houses now seem to be required to have a box on the street, and the push for centralized neighborhood boxes ain't ever going to end.

We live in Pasadena, CA and most of the houses here have them. I love it.

[Madding crowd]

Here in Chicago and the suburbs, we still have mailboxes on the front porch. Packages get delivered to the front door so why not mail? I can understand large condo or apartment buildings having a central mail section but it would be difficult to do in older neighborhoods.

[zxy556575]

Doesn't it seem like TV houses have a much higher percentage of letter slots than exist normally? Directors love those shots of mail being pushed through and spread out on the floor. Especially in apartments, which I've never seen IRL.

[DeLurker]

4 hours ago, kiddo82 said:

Or the girlfriend finds out that "Bobby from work" is actually Barbara.  She will always be annoyed and ask, "Why didn't you tell me your partner was a woman?"  At the same time she will insist she's not jealous.

Bobby is always a knock-out.

[methodwriter85]

7 hours ago, atomationage said:

Except maybe if the mother was a Jane Austen fan.

I'm willing to give Emma a pass. It wasn't popular in the 50's or 60's, but it has been a pretty well-used name since the 19th century, and you can always figure she might have gotten named for an older relative. It's like the name Amy. It screams 1970's baby to me, but it's actually been a pretty well-used name throughout the past two centuries, just currently on a downtrend.

What bothers me is when it's a name that was just simply not used, like having Meghan on Mad Men. It's a Welsch name, which didn't gibe with the French Canadian background they gave her, and it just wasn't on the radar at all until babies who were born in the 1960's and 1970's, not 28-year olds in 1969.

I kind of loved Bates Motel for going against the trope that the boyishly named girl is the rootable, loveable tomboy. Bradley was pretty much a wishy-washy user and undercover bitch.

[vibeology]

I probably could have dealt with Mad Men's Megan if they hadn't named her sister Marie-France. Or if they had told us Megan was a stage name. 

[Raja]

10 hours ago, lordonia said:

Doesn't it seem like TV houses have a much higher percentage of letter slots than exist normally? Directors love those shots of mail being pushed through and spread out on the floor. Especially in apartments, which I've never seen IRL.

I have heard from Royal Mail carriers who don't generally carry all the ads that their American counterparts do that in many cases they do walk door to door in apartment buildings . I see it occasionally but it is the exception and we certainly are not walking the different floors to do it except in a large office building environment. What seems weird to me in the New York based shows is that apartment managers regularly clean out other people's mailboxes and place the mail on the floor. What I see are apartment boxes, we call them gang boxes in the service and it had nothing to do with street gangs, that are stuffed until the door breaks open as fewer people check their boxes regularly as more and more junk versus first class mail is getting delivered over the years.

[MaryPatShelby]

Only on TV does someone say "I have to take this" every. single. time. the phone rings, without checking caller ID or looking at the cell phone screen to see who it is. 

[GreekGeek]

On the mail delivery: My neighborhood's houses have mail slots. It's the mailboxes with the little flags that seem quaint to me. Do letter carriers still put the flag up when they deliver the mail, and the recipient puts the flag down after collecting the mail?

Edited October 2, 2016 by GreekGeek

[Bastet]

Quote

It's the mailboxes with the little flags that seem quaint to me. Do letter carriers still put the flag up when they deliver the mail, and the recipient puts the flag down after collecting the mail?

Other way around (at least when I was growing up); the resident puts the flag up if they have outgoing mail (so that the letter carrier knows to stop to collect even if they don't have anything to deliver at that address), and then puts it down so the resident knows they've been there.

Of course, the process is somewhat antiquated now, since it would be akin to saying, "Hello, I have checks sitting here for the taking," but that's how it was designed to work.

[St. Claire]

22 hours ago, Bastet said:

Other way around (at least when I was growing up); the resident puts the flag up if they have outgoing mail (so that the letter carrier knows to stop to collect even if they don't have anything to deliver at that address), and then puts it down so the resident knows they've been there.

Of course, the process is somewhat antiquated now, since it would be akin to saying, "Hello, I have checks sitting here for the taking," but that's how it was designed to work.

Wait, there are still people who pay their bills by putting checks into the mail?! That's just crazy talk! (Kidding; I know it's not obsolete, but it seems as though almost everyone I know has moved to online banking and can go years on one pad of checks.)

[ChromaKelly]

On 10/2/2016 at 3:31 PM, Bastet said:

Other way around (at least when I was growing up); the resident puts the flag up if they have outgoing mail (so that the letter carrier knows to stop to collect even if they don't have anything to deliver at that address), and then puts it down so the resident knows they've been there.

Of course, the process is somewhat antiquated now, since it would be akin to saying, "Hello, I have checks sitting here for the taking," but that's how it was designed to work.

The flag on our mailbox at work broke off. We didn't replace it right away. When we put outgoing mail in the box, it wouldn't always get taken because the letter carrier didn't look to collect mail because of the missing flag. We fixed the flag and now the mail gets picked up. It's not antiquated at all. If you live on what's considered a rural route, mailboxes are at the street, not on your house. Some areas mailboxes are all on one side of the street so the carrier only has to drive down the street once.

[DisneyBoy]

How is it everyone on TV has antique or retro appliances in their homes or apartments? I know set decorators love them, but most of us do not go out of our way to own appliances that are 50 years old just because they have a nice art deco line to them. Once you start seeing this on shows you can't ever unsee it. And it never matters what the age of the characters is...they could be college students or a happily married couple with kids, but they will always have retro appliances.

Edited October 4, 2016 by DisneyBoy

[atomationage]

6 minutes ago, DisneyBoy said:

they will always have retro appliances.

I actually like looking at the set decoration.  It's better than the shows sometimes.  Of course, old refrigerators on tv shows don't have to be plugged in or working at all. 

[ganesh]

I was amazed when I moved to a new place and asked where there were drop boxes to mail something and they said, "the mailman will just do it for you." I was flummoxed.

[DisneyBoy]

Quote

Speaking of throwing up, why do people on TV always cough after they vomit? I don't know if you've ever coughed after throwing up, but I accidentally did, and it really burns your throat. 

Yes, vomiting scenes on television shows never rang true to me either. Its usually a case of someone spitting a bit of oatmeal out of their mouth and then coughing. Where's the torrent of projectile liquid shooting out of their mouths for a good 10 to 15 seconds in painful spurts? Where's the gasping? I understand some things are played down for the television audience, but since vomiting is almost always used as a plot point to show that someone is pregnant or someone is overdosing or someone's life is spiraling out of control, I wish they would at least have someone just off to the side of the camera pouring out a big pot of soup so that we can hear what vomiting actually sounds like instead of that weird "oops I had a tickle in my throat" thing ever seems real.

[ChromaKelly]

25 minutes ago, DisneyBoy said:

Yes, vomiting scenes on television shows never rang true to me either. Its usually a case of someone spitting a bit of oatmeal out of their mouth and then coughing. Where's the torrent of projectile liquid shooting out of their mouths for a good 10 to 15 seconds in painful spurts? Where's the gasping? I understand some things are played down for the television audience, but since vomiting is almost always used as a plot point to show that someone is pregnant or someone is overdosing or someone's life is spiraling out of control, I wish they would at least have someone just off to the side of the camera pouring out a big pot of soup so that we can hear what vomiting actually sounds like instead of that weird "oops I had a tickle in my throat" thing ever seems real.

And the dry heaving when you're like hello stomach, there's nothing left, please stop!
I would be fine though if TV shows could just stop with the vomiting. Cut away, let it be implied.

After Masters of Sex another one. Uh... if you have just gone down on someone, please wipe your mouth off.  Kissing afterwards.. that's a YMMV...

Edited October 4, 2016 by ChromaKelly

[Mulva]

On Saturday, October 01, 2016 at 3:15 PM, shapeshifter said:

Aquarius (show this summer set in the late 60's) used one of today's most popular girl's name, Emma, for a main character who was not famous for being part of the Manson family, with whom she lives in the show. I thought that was an interesting use of an unrealistic name choice, but it seemed most of the viewers were just annoyed by the insertion of a fictional character into Manson lore, even though each episode began with a disclaimer that the show was a mix of fact and fiction. It might have helped if they had a voice (instead of just words briefly on the screen) like at the beginning of all the L&O shows. Anyway, someone I was talking to about this said Emma was at the bottom of the list of popular girl's names in the 50s and 60s.

The only Emma I knew on 1969 was a Mennonite.  That name really took me out of the show.  She would have been called Donna, Debbie, or Susan.

[Shannon L.]

Strong, independent, feminists flatly refuse any act of good manners from men.  A man will never buy them dinner, open a door for them, drive the car to the location of their night out, etc.....If said feminist is a tom boy*, then she will even become verbally combative over it. 

*That sounds like a childish term, but I can't think of another word for it-my mind is blank right now.

[Anela]

10 hours ago, Shannon L. said:

Strong, independent, feminists flatly refuse any act of good manners from men.  A man will never buy them dinner, open a door for them, drive the car to the location of their night out, etc.....If said feminist is a tom boy*, then she will even become verbally combative over it. 

*That sounds like a childish term, but I can't think of another word for it-my mind is blank right now.

They also don't expect child support from ex-boyfriends/ex-husbands. They insist they're going to make it on their own - like the mother of a child that came from an affair with a rich man, in a TV show. He suddenly decides he loves the son, tracks them down, and finds out that the mother hasn't been using the money he sent every month. She was working nights just across the road, determined to make it on her own. That would only make sense in an abusive situation, where the mother was afraid of the ex. 

[topanga]

Only on TV do characters always make eye contact when talking to each other. There's rarely any yelling across the room or talking to someone as you're walking out of the room, forcing other people to go, "What? I didn't catch that?"

...unless it's a plot point on a sit-com. "I thought you said, 'Bring me a giant goat,' not 'Bring me a Diet Coke.' That's why there's a billy goat in our living room eating the stuffing from our couch.   (OMG--I originally typed "sofa" then had to delete it and change it to "couch." I think I've lived on the East Coast too long).

[ChromaKelly]

A lot of sit-com houses have a swinging door between the living area and the kitchen. I don't think I've ever seen a house IRL with one, except my grandmother's had those half-doors like in an old Western bar.

Another conversation one - Stopping the elevator to Say Something Important.

[Bastet]

I have a swinging door between my kitchen and dining room.  My grandparents' house had one, too, so between that and the TV exposure (although right now I can only picture one in the Cosby Show), they're typical to me.  But there have been several people who, upon coming to my house for the first time, have commented on the door, so I'm sure they're a novelty to others.

[ganesh]

1 hour ago, ChromaKelly said:

A lot of sit-com houses have a swinging door between the living area and the kitchen. I don't think I've ever seen a house IRL with one, except my grandmother's had those half-doors like in an old Western bar.

I think it's a leftover from the 70s. I remember some houses like that, including my own. I only remember the full sliding door from tv though on Three's Company. 

[Mulva]

On 10/9/2016 at 8:18 PM, Anela said:

They also don't expect child support from ex-boyfriends/ex-husbands. They insist they're going to make it on their own - like the mother of a child that came from an affair with a rich man, in a TV show. He suddenly decides he loves the son, tracks them down, and finds out that the mother hasn't been using the money he sent every month. She was working nights just across the road, determined to make it on her own. That would only make sense in an abusive situation, where the mother was afraid of the ex. 

And only on TV is this seen as a righteous thing to do.  IRL, it comes across as pigheaded stupidity bordering on child abuse if the mother chooses to live in dire poverty rather than accept help.  e.g. Gilmore Girls.  In that case, the teen mother who not only rejected child support from both the boyfriend's wealthy family and her own wealthy parents in order to work as a hotel maid and live in a shed.  Again, IRL, CPS would have been involved and she would have lost custody. 

[Shannon L.]

Only on tv do all really small towns have streets lined with quaint, beautifully kept houses and big trees with lots of foliage.  Town centers that have architecture that looks like it did hundreds of years ago and everyone is friends and helpful to each other whenever someone is in need. 

Yeah....no. 

[shapeshifter]

Only on TV do defendants with a mental illness take medication for a day or two and are then completely normal at trial, or the opposite where they stop taking medication for a day and are then bat shit crazy in the courtroom.

[MaryPatShelby]

Only on TV are arrested people put in jail cells that come straight from the Mayberry set, with no limitations on who can come in and talk to/yell at the confined.  I work in a jail, and this is just not how it happens. Visitation is a huge deal and it certainly doesn't happen on the other side of the cell door.

[DittyDotDot]

You mean, you don't have an Otis? That's too bad. ;)

[Haleth]

On 10/11/2016 at 3:55 PM, Shannon L. said:

Only on tv do all really small towns have streets lined with quaint, beautifully kept houses and big trees with lots of foliage.

And that foliage is still green at Thanksgiving and beyond.

[Shannon L.]

Only on TV do teachers start teaching on the 1st day of school. Chemicals are being mixed and dead creatures in jars are on desks in science classes, math equations are being worked our on blackboards, a student is standing, reading from a novel in English class.......etc..

[ChromaKelly]

School drop-off is never true to life. Where is this place where parents mill about in front of the school? Mine have always been a car line, and your kid just hops out of the car when it's your turn.

[andromeda331]

Those that live with magic around them, spells, shapshifters or people who can change their form to look like someone else never, ever jump to that conclusion when their sister, parent, friend etc begins acting weird.  Even when they notice their acting weird but chalk it up to something else. Then are surprised when they realize that's the case. Even after its happened to them many times.  

[Shannon L.]

I've noticed this more in movies than on tv shows, but have you ever noticed how fast someone's hair grows on film?  It can be cropped really short and a year or less later, it's shoulder length!  Good haircuts can be expensive--I'm glad it doesn't really grow that fast!

[Cherpumple]

On 10/29/2016 at 8:45 PM, andromeda331 said:

Those that live with magic around them, spells, shapshifters or people who can change their form to look like someone else never, ever jump to that conclusion when their sister, parent, friend etc begins acting weird.  Even when they notice their acting weird but chalk it up to something else. Then are surprised when they realize that's the case. Even after its happened to them many times.  

Thank you! Have these people never heard of a using a safe word?

[Anela]

On 10/29/2016 at 6:21 PM, Shannon L. said:

I've noticed this more in movies than on tv shows, but have you ever noticed how fast someone's hair grows on film?  It can be cropped really short and a year or less later, it's shoulder length!  Good haircuts can be expensive--I'm glad it doesn't really grow that fast!

And they grow three inches overnight, if they're very young, and they had a six-month break between shooting.

I was reminded yesterday: whenever anyone puts on a record, people are going to die. This one was a man dancing with his wife, as the music was the backdrop of several people being gunned down. Lovely.

[Shannon L.]

If you're standing next to someone that you have feelings for and something happens that either requires you to dive for cover, or causes you both to fall, one of you will land on top of the other.  And be careful if you are a woman with large breasts and wearing a low cut dress--that's a guarantee that the man you are interested in will land on top of you with his face right in your chest.

[Joe]

It is apparently tradition to wear an ugly sweater around Christmas. I never heard of it before around five years ago. Of course, no one wears jumpers at Australian Christmas, unless they enjoy keeling over from heatstroke.

[kiddo82]

The ugly sweater thing became this ironic trend a few years ago.  People actually did use to buy these really ostentatious Santa/snowman/reindeer sweaters and years later it became "a thing" to find and wear a particularly tacky one that would make grandma or your weird aunt proud.  Of course now it's cool and they actually make stylish looking "ugly" sweaters which sort of defeats the joke of dong it ironically. 

Edited November 2, 2016 by kiddo82

[Joe]

Thanks for the explanation! I don't see the appeal, but it's harmless enough.

[zxy556575]

1 hour ago, kiddo82 said:

People actually did use to buy these really ostentatious Santa/snowman/reindeer sweaters...

I invite you to visit my retirement town to view an array of recently purchased and completely un-ironic holiday themed garments. ;)