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Toaster Strudel

Hired Friends: Whitney's Social Barnacles

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I thought it would be cool to have a thread just for Quitney's hired friends, I got mod permission for it!

We can talk about all her sycophants!

Edited by Toaster Strudel
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Ooooooh....So much to snark about, I don't even know where to start!:) (Thanks for the great new thread, Toaster Strudel!!!)

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We can start with Brainless Buddy!  He is such a dopey simpleton with sub-reptilian levels of conversation.  We know that was the attraction for Twitney.  I find it hard to believe that there is another woman (Heather, who should have options) who finds this attractive.  I am only looking at this personality because I have eliminated looks as a factor.

Edited by Toaster Strudel
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I always thought Heather was the most normal one, until she talked about wanting to take her shoes off and fight the comedian (my immediate thought was "is that why Whitney is barefoot? She's ready to fight?"). She also said on FB that Todd's "see you next Tuesday" line was amazing, so there you go. Bitch. Hard pass.

Buddy is a total shithead. Schlubby loser. Don't know how he got a hot chick like Heather (she must be desperate), or why Whitney was, in her words, in the depths of obsession with him. He is unattractive and is a pizza delivery boy past the age of 30. HARD PASS.

Todd is okay, but I wonder how okay he is with being portrayed as Whitney's stereotypical "gay accessory friend." It always annoys me when gay men are reduced to this role on reality TV. Plus after See You Next Tuesday-Gate, HARD PASS.

Tal I actually like, for the most part. He seems fairly sincere. It might be because he seems relatively distant from the day-to-day trainwreck that is Whitney's life. 

There is someone named Donna Lee who posted a video of herself shooing Whitney's cat out of the bathroom. In it she is sitting on the toilet and you can see her bare thigh, and the cat exiting the bathroom out the wide-open door, and she's complaining that the cat is not respecting her privacy. CLOSE THE DOOR THEN, MORON. And why would you post a video of yourself on a toilet on the internet? HARD PASS to whoever that idiot is.

Lennie has all the personality and raw excitement of a senior's knitting class. Hard pass.

I don't remember who else Whitney is friends with, so clearly they ain't that memorable. I guess that Ashley girl, who was smart enough to get away from this bullshit when it went over the edge into "godawful." I like her, then.

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I used to think Heather was pretty OK, but knowing she’s praising Todd on FB for the C-word, she's demoted to the dregs of humanity status with the rest of the group. (Really Heather? You're setting a great example for your young children.)

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24 minutes ago, ClareWalks said:

I always thought Heather was the most normal one, until she talked about wanting to take her shoes off and fight

I thought she misremember "taking the gloves off."

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Just now, auntjess said:

I thought she misremember "taking the gloves off."

Or "take my earrings off." Maybe she was distracted by Whit's bare feet, LOL :)

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I agree with all of you abt Twit's barnacles,  except Tal. Hard pass on him too.

Mainly because he is supposed to be counselor of some type. Remember Tal ate fruit loops with her,  when they should have taken a short walk, or got something healthy,  cuz you know,  eating your feelings  is not exactly low cal. The funeral intervention was his idea,  and he did not even stand up for himself --or Twit's health-- at the reunion....even before Kerryn brought it up. And Tal laughed as hard as the rest of them at Twit's humping of the poor, defenseless ground, the imbecilic rapping, and bullying/ganging up on Kerryn. 

Tal cashed his TLC check,  I'm sure.  Sell out. 

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Love the thread title. Thanks Toaster Strudel. Would we even classify Lennie as a friend? I truly think he was hired or took the gig to promote his art. 

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22 minutes ago, Tosia said:

I agree with all of you abt Twit's barnacles,  except Tal. Hard pass on him too.

Mainly because he is supposed to be counselor of some type. Remember Tal ate fruit loops with her,  when they should have taken a short walk, or got something healthy,  cuz you know,  eating your feelings  is not exactly low cal. The funeral intervention was his idea,  and he did not even stand up for himself --or Twit's health-- at the reunion....even before Kerryn brought it up. And Tal laughed as hard as the rest of them at Twit's humping of the poor, defenseless ground, the imbecilic rapping, and bullying/ganging up on Kerryn. 

Tal cashed his TLC check,  I'm sure.  Sell out. 

I agree about Tal & Heather too.  Tal looked like he wished the floor would  swallow him up when Kerryn brought up the funeral even tho like you said, it was his idea.  It was also part Babz ( now she's Babs with a "Z" for street cred)  since she suggested some type of an intervention in the first place. 

I'd like to know about why Ashley wasn't on the show more.  She was shown on the bike ride & on an extra (deleted) scene showing her pampering Whit's feet. Was she at the birthday dinner?  Maybe her & Whit had it out since it was said that she had lost weight herself. 

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A Evening Out with The Barnacles of Twitlandia:

As a group, they pick the restaurant with the largest buffet in town. (Natch.) They are led to their table, nearest the buffet, of course. Buddy is wheezing, his face is turning a strange color & he's mumbling something no one can understand, Todd spins, hip-pops and dance-struts his way to the table, Tal demands a larger bowl for a Fruit Loops appetizer and Heather is shouting "Todd, that C-U-Next-Tuesday thing was awesome! Everybody together now, C--U--Next...." while doing some lame cheerleader pose. Then, in unison, they all demand a larger chair in preparation for the Queen of Twitlandia's arrival....which is announced with a soundbyte of donkey-braying laughter blasted over the sound system. Once everyone is seated, and the Queen's shoes have been removed, they share a pitcher of frappuccinos and toast to the awesomeness of being "besties" with The Coolest Dancer and Best Twerker on Earth.

Ahhhh, what a life they live. I am SO freakin' jealous!!! ;)

Edited by TotoGirl
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I firmly believe in that all of Whitney's friends only put up with Twit because they're on TLC's pay roll. I would bet that most of them don't even see or talk to Whitney if the cameras aren't there. It's very easy to tell they don't like her. They can't stand her! They laugh at her and basically make fun of her. They're all fake, except maybe Buddy. No one really can put up with Whitney... It's only those that need the pay check and don't mind being on tv (or loooove the fame *cough cough* Todd).

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2 hours ago, TotoGirl said:

I used to think Heather was pretty OK, but knowing she’s praising Todd on FB for the C-word, she's demoted to the dregs of humanity status with the rest of the group. (Really Heather? You're setting a great example for your young children.)

I agree. It is also why Todd moved to the scum column on my list too. I thought Todd was heading toward telling Whitney what he thought. He was at least saying some things out of her ear shot, so it was a start. But at this point even if he stands up to her I don't think he will be able to crawl out from under using that word. 

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During this season, I wondered why Ashley was never shown, then I read somewhere that Ashley had begun a fitness & weight loss journey. Made me wonder if Twit said nasty things to Ashley (like she said about Roy) for wanting to lose weight, and they had it out, and that's why she isn't a regular on the show anymore.

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From the way Twit reacted to Roy's alleged weight loss, a person doesn't accept and respect oneself when he/she tries to lose weight. It basically means that if you're working on losing weight you're fat shaming yourself!!

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I get the impression they were friends from high school, a group no one liked too much.   Theater wanna-be's who never got a part in the play.

By luck only Whitney got discovered and now they are now smoking and addicted to TLC meth.

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I think Todd wants his own show, which would make him something like a G list celebrity.  And I'm still inclined to like Heather a bit because her heart doesn't seem to be in the defending Whitney routine.  I think she's phoning it in for the paycheck.

3 hours ago, ClareWalks said:

Buddy is a total shithead. Schlubby loser. Don't know how he got a hot chick like Heather (she must be desperate), or why Whitney was, in her words, in the depths of obsession with him. He is unattractive and is a pizza delivery boy past the age of 30. HARD PASS.

Sadly I think it's slim pickings for divorced moms with 2 young kids :/

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1 hour ago, polandspring said:

Sadly I think it's slim pickings for divorced moms with 2 young kids :/

Barf. I'd rather be single than have sex with THAT jerkoff.

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11 minutes ago, 3girlsforus said:

I guess we can be grateful that they aren't being sold into this train wreck.

As if Whitney would risk being upstaged by cute kids! Especially Heather's!

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I actually liked Buddy in the beginning. He was like a big, old, cuddly teddy bear. (I have a thing for the John Goodman types.) But after his behavior with Kerryn, both in the first episode and in the reunion, I now have him on the same level as Whitney. 

Someone asked if it was natural or normal for people to still be friends with their high school friends. Todd, Buddy, and Heather all went to high school with Whitney. I am wondering if she has trouble making and maintaining friendships. Considering her level of maturity, which looks like it never reached beyond 16, it seems right on that she would continue to remain friends with those who she hung out with at that age. 

Donna Lee is apparently her roommate. I guess she just doesn't want to be filmed. Kind of weird though, huh? And it makes me a little mad. Oh yeah, we're seeing her "real" life...

I don't know what Todd's deal is. He supposedly lives in NYC but, as others have pointed out, he's in Greensboro a LOT. And he's meant to be a "dancer" as well? I Googled him and can't find anything on him that says "dancer" so perhaps he is a dancer in the same way that Whitney is. 

Heather's FB pages are full of MBFFL advertisements. She's earning her paycheck. I think they're all just playing parts now, going in for their money, and have lost sight of what their REAL lives are. Whitney herself now even seems to think of her life in terms of seasons. So weird. 

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Yes, mamadrama, I noticed mean girl host asking Lennie if he would be back "next season". If Lennie and Twit are broken up, why would he be? BECAUSE IT'S ALL FAKE. 

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6 minutes ago, jacksgirl said:

Yes, mamadrama, I noticed mean girl host asking Lennie if he would be back "next season". If Lennie and Twit are broken up, why would he be? BECAUSE IT'S ALL FAKE. 

Or because it's totes real and Shaun could see "Lennie and Whitney looking at each other with heart eyes" and she hoped a little nudge would "get them back in each others arms where they so belong." They "absolutely radiate their need and love for each other." And "they are both so charismatic!!" The quotes are actual words from actual fans who apparently do not live in actual reality.

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Wow Ketzel, that is what her online barnacles say? I don't go to the bother of following her on social media.  Wow, just wow. Am not any kind of expert, but if you read body language, Lennie was leaning away from Twit the whole time on the sofa and I need to know more about "Sandalgate". Lennie was gone when Twit walked off, but she had to be wearing his flip flops since we could never see any kind of footwear under her sofa.  Did Lennie come back and give her the flip flops to leave in? Enquiring minds want to know....

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On 8/20/2016 at 11:25 PM, mamadrama said:

Someone asked if it was natural or normal for people to still be friends with their high school friends. Todd, Buddy, and Heather all went to high school with Whitney. I am wondering if she has trouble making and maintaining friendships. Considering her level of maturity, which looks like it never reached beyond 16, it seems right on that she would continue to remain friends with those who she hung out with at that age.

Eh, I still have close friends from high school and I graduated 40 years ago this year.  They are the best friends I'll ever have - more like family to me than friends.  These were definitely not immature relationships.  I think a lot of people keep in touch with or remain close with HS friends and stay even closer if geography permits.  I have read that the best friends people can make are the ones that last decades.  You have a lot in common with people you grew up with by virtue of being from the same place and time.  I also think it depends on what kind of experience one has in HS and what kind of people they meet.  Some people have horrible HS experiences - I was lucky, I had a great one, and the people were great.  I met some good friends after HS but none quite as close.  It was a special time and place.  Everyone's experiences are different.  I just think that Whitney's little peanut gallery has been dysfunctional for a long time because they revolve around her and as we all know she's an immature narcissist.  It wouldn't matter whether they met in HS or last week, it would still be the same.  Then again it's doubtful as to whether any of these people except perhaps for Buddy was ever really all that close to her.  As you said, they've lost sight of what their real lives are and are in it for the paycheck.

On 8/20/2016 at 11:25 PM, mamadrama said:

Donna Lee is apparently her roommate. I guess she just doesn't want to be filmed. Kind of weird though, huh? And it makes me a little mad. Oh yeah, we're seeing her "real" life...

Really?  Whitney has a female roommate?  I thought Buddy was her housemate, now she has a roommate too?  This is the first I've heard of this.  I knew we weren't seeing her real life but now there are people that close who don't even appear on the show?  WTF?

On 8/20/2016 at 11:25 PM, mamadrama said:

I don't know what Todd's deal is. He supposedly lives in NYC but, as others have pointed out, he's in Greensboro a LOT. And he's meant to be a "dancer" as well? I Googled him and can't find anything on him that says "dancer" so perhaps he is a dancer in the same way that Whitney is.

Yeah, I think so.  I have said in other places that I think all these "friends" are people she knows hired for the show, not necessarily best buds with her but they do know each other a long time.  Perhaps Todd lived in Greensboro when he did that first "Fat Girl Dancing" video with Twit and moved to NY afterward, but the show and or the Twit wanted him to play a part so he lives there when they're filming.  Something bugs me about Todd.  He is so very dweeby.  There is something I find very awkward about him and his body language.

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11 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:
On 8/20/2016 at 10:25 PM, mamadrama said:

Donna Lee is apparently her roommate. I guess she just doesn't want to be filmed. Kind of weird though, huh? And it makes me a little mad. Oh yeah, we're seeing her "real" life...

It makes me wonder if perhaps Buddy moved out and this Donna Lee is now Whitney's roommate. If Buddy really does want to lose weight, maybe he was smart enough to realize that he could never do it while living with Whitney and ordering Pizza every day. 

On 8/20/2016 at 2:11 PM, Barb23 said:

I'd like to know about why Ashley wasn't on the show more.  She was shown on the bike ride & on an extra (deleted) scene showing her pampering Whit's feet. Was she at the birthday dinner?  Maybe her & Whit had it out since it was said that she had lost weight herself. 

It's kind of interesting if Ashley has lost weight, Buddy said he wanted to loose weight, and Whitney said that Roy has lost 50 pounds. It wouldn't surprise me if they have all looked at how Whitney's excess weight has negatively impacted her health and mobility and realized they should get their weight under control so that doesn't happen to them.

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We know Twit's friends get paid to be on MBFFL, but I think the most underpaid people involved with Twit's show are the camera operators that put in long days recording 1000+ hours of Twit's life. Whatever they are making should be increased 100-fold, at least!

Edited by TotoGirl
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14 hours ago, Snarklepuss said:

Eh, I still have close friends from high school and I graduated 40 years ago this year.  

Really?  Whitney has a female roommate?  I thought Buddy was her housemate, now she has a roommate too?  This is the first I've heard of this.  I knew we weren't seeing her real life but now there are people that close who don't even appear on the show?  WTF?

 

Yeah, I live in a tiny, tiny town and am still friends with a few people I attended high school and even elementary school with. I  don't necessarily think there is anything weird with that at all, I just think it kind of plays into Whitney's whole personality. I guess I was looking at it in terms of her, and not the general public. :-)

That Donna person comments on Whitney's stuff and talks about living with her. She posts videos of her on the toilet and Whitney's cat coming in on her. And eludes to them living in the same house. Also, in the videos of them watching TV, like LOVE AT FIRST KISS, Donna is always in them. Don't know why they don't show her. Maybe they want to make it look like Whitney and Buddy live alone. Blech. 

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I think it's a little odd that Whit can't afford her mortgage without a roommate. Unless Donna is there is help her put her shoes on and rescue her from the shower in case she gets stuck.

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Oh, Totogitl, those poor camera/ sound operators!  They have to listen to her whining,  crying,  and braying all the time!  

Plus,  I bet Whit asks them for help putting on shoes, finding her lighter and smokes,  answering the door to pay the pizza delivery guy,  and other more  personal tasks. 

Hope their pay is commensurate.  

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2 hours ago, TotoGirl said:

We know Twit's friends get paid to be on MBFFL, but I think the most underpaid people involved with Twit's show are the camera operators that put in long days recording 1000+ hours of Twit's life. Whatever they are making should be increased 100-fold, at least!

Aren't these the guys who picked her up on the ski slope?  Hazardous duty pay.

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Plus their jobs are apparently on the line if they displease her. Before Kerryn fully understood her all the ways her contract prevented her from disclosing behind-the-scenes info about her time on the show, she mentioned that a production assistant told her Whitney was a heavy smoker, and Whitney attempted to get the assistant fired when she found out.  (Kerryn did an "oopsie" on FB about it and I think has since deleted the comment. This was before she was asked to return for the finale, so I'm guessing TLC didn't make it an issue.)

Edited by Ketzel
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does Buddy deliver pizzas for a living? I heard Whitney say once he was in the music business or maybe I'm confusing him with someone else. What does Lennie do for a living? Whitney said once he had a crazy schedule. Wonder what he does. Ain't it funny how TLC tries to give Whitney fake jobs. I wonder if that's the case for most of her friends (except Tal, who works as a counselor at a school, that sounds like it's true) Don't know about the rest. It's like they want us to forget their main source of income is most likely MBFFL

ETA: I hope they bring Ashley back for season 4. I think she and Whitney have better chemistry than Heather and Whitney.

Edited by DatFatShorty
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IIRC Lenny works at Michaels craft store and Buddy tends bar. But I'm not 100% sure about Buddy.

Edited by PityFree
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On August 22, 2016 at 1:08 PM, absolutelyido said:

 

It's kind of interesting if Ashley has lost weight, Buddy said he wanted to loose weight, and Whitney said that Roy has lost 50 pounds. It wouldn't surprise me if they have all looked at how Whitney's excess weight has negatively impacted her health and mobility and realized they should get their weight under control so that doesn't happen to them.

When Whitney said that Roy had lost weight, she said something to the effect that he didn't embrace the no body shame mantra.  (Im paraphrasing).

I took that to mean that she had an issue with him losing weight. That he shouldn't have to lose weight just like she thinks about herself in her delusional world.

Does that mean she won't accept buddy if he loses weight? That he is turning against her?

Maybe I'm twisting her words. I can definitely see her as not being supportive of him. I bet she would sabotage him. She would make him feel guilty for not eating pizza with her. I hope he moves out and drops a ton of weight.

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38 minutes ago, Bubbles1967 said:

I can definitely see her as not being supportive of him. I bet she would sabotage him. She would make him feel guilty for not eating pizza with her. I hope he moves out and drops a ton of weight

This is what bothers me about Whitney. She has taken the stance that anyone trying to lose weight must be ashamed of their current body. I'm a big girl and I'm completely ok with how I look. This doesn't mean that I wouldn't also like myself if I got into better shape. I get the sense that Whitney isn't really that happy with how she looks. She's trying to make it seem better by surrounding herself with heavy set individuals so she'll feel more "normal" comparatively. When those individuals (Buddy, Ashley, Roy, etc.) lose weight, she has to internally rationalize this. She does this by saying "Ok, they just hate themselves." I do agree that she's going to sabotage others in as many ways as possible to "prove" that fat is better.

 

I just think she's so invested in her self-delusions (everyone wants her as a sex object, she's healthy, she's trying so hard and no one appreciates how hard she's working, etc.) that she can't see the truth of the matter. She could still be "fat" or heavy 100 lbs lighter but she'd be better able to get around, dance, ski, ride a bike, etc. than she is right now. She could find healthier options. There's cauliflower pizza crust recipes out there with just a small amount of work to make healthier pizzas than those on offer from take out places. There are healthier options on fast food and restaurant menus. There are smaller drinks at Starbucks that she could order. She just wants Penny's "yellow brick road" to easy weight loss without having to put forward any effort. The social barnacles aren't helping one bit.

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34 minutes ago, MegD said:

 

34 minutes ago, MegD said:

 

I just think she's so invested in her self-delusions (everyone wants her as a sex object, she's healthy, she's trying so hard and no one appreciates how hard she's working, etc.) that she can't see the truth of the matter. She could still be "fat" or heavy 100 lbs lighter but she'd be better able to get around, dance, ski, ride a bike, etc. than she is right now. She could find healthier options. There's cauliflower pizza crust recipes out there with just a small amount of work to make healthier pizzas than those on offer from take out places. There are healthier options on fast food and restaurant menus. There are smaller drinks at Starbucks that she could order. She just wants Penny's "yellow brick road" to easy weight loss without having to put forward any effort. The social barnacles aren't helping one bit.

Whitney eat healthy? Remember how the salmon went over like a lead balloon.

i totally agree about losing the weight to feel better. She knows she would move better with 100 lbs off her frame. She should want that for her  ehem "dance career". She can still stay "fat" for her fans and her campaign.

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...or she could get just get weight loss surgery and lose around half of her excess weight with pretty much no effort (Penny is a freak of nature).  In about 10 years, when she has no choice but to get the surgery, she'll wish she just went ahead and did it back in her 30's.

Edited by notyrmomma
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Idk about Twit being successful with weight loss surgery because she hasn't made an effort to learn about nutrition or work out consistently.  Didn't Carnie Wilson gain back alot of weight after her surgery?  

IMHO, Whit is a quitter, also, as we have seen in several situations.  She needs toy stay fat for her fame--although I TOTALLY  agree that she could lose a 100 or 200 pounds and still be a fat role model--just a positive role model, instead of the delusional joke that she is now.  

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At this point Twit wouldn't lose weight with weight loss surgery, as she's as deep into delusions as Penny was.  And she'd go down the same route, eating too much and stretching her stomach right back to it's current proportions.  Twit would be drinking non-stop Fraps and milkshakes for as many hours as she was awake.  And truly, I'm not sure Twit WANTS to lose weight, because if she did, people would expect her to maybe have a "real" dance career.  Or at least get a real job.  And to do that, she'd have to step it up REALLY a lot.  Thin people don't get paid for doing jazz hands and twerking for a few minutes.  And no one would be willing to shave her legs or put her shoes on for her.  Why, she might even stop being the center of the universe if she lost weight!  How awful would THAT be?

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I recently read an article by a woman whose mother had weight loss surgery. The article was about how her mother had "left her behind", more or less. I thought it was going to be kind of funny, perhaps tongue in cheek. It wasn't. The author really was angry that her mother was losing weight. Apparently, they were both overweight and now that her mother is thin, the daughter is taking it as a personal affront. I found the whole thing kind of weird. It reminded me of Whitney and her comments about Roy's weight loss and how it must mean that he doesn't embrace his size. (Or whatever it was she said.) 

I think Whitney gets upset at other people's weight loss because it's too close to them implying that there is something wrong with her. Overweight people around her (not just overweight but actually morbidly obese) kind of help back up her point and mantra of being fabulous at any size. When those folks start shedding pounds they're indirectly saying they do NOT feel fabulous (which Whitney probably takes to mean that they, therefore, don't think SHE is fabulous either).

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1 minute ago, mamadrama said:

I think Whitney gets upset at other people's weight loss because it's too close to them implying that there is something wrong with her. Overweight people around her (not just overweight but actually morbidly obese) kind of help back up her point and mantra of being fabulous at any size. When those folks start shedding pounds they're indirectly saying they do NOT feel fabulous (which Whitney probably takes to mean that they, therefore, don't think SHE is fabulous either).

Yep! Her identity is wrapped up in being fat, so when her friends reject THEIR fatness, she thinks they're rejecting her. Which they absolutely should reject her, because she is vile. I found it hilarious when Buddy added all these "well, for ME PERSONALLY" statements about how unhealthy he is at this weight, trying not to hurt Whit's feelings with pesky things like "facts" and "medical science."

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I can't imagine Whit being accepted for weight loss surgery, and it certainly wasn't a miracle cure for those who didn't put in the effort to follow the rules, on diet and exercise.
I just see her being more and more immobile.

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On August 22, 2016 at 0:18 AM, Snarklepuss said:

Yeah, I think so.  I have said in other places that I think all these "friends" are people she knows hired for the show, not necessarily best buds with her but they do know each other a long time.  Perhaps Todd lived in Greensboro when he did that first "Fat Girl Dancing" video with Twit and moved to NY afterward, but the show and or the Twit wanted him to play a part so he lives there when they're filming.  Something bugs me about Todd.  He is so very dweeby.  There is something I find very awkward about him and his body language.

He is very awkward and strange to me too.  I can't help but giggle whenever he dances bc his face looks so serious as he is doing these silly, juvenile dance numbers.  He is one of the worst-dressed gay men I've ever seen in his workout ensembles.  However, he seems very sweet and kind.  I feel sorry for him whenever he speaks the truth and gets a verbal smack down and/or Manson eyes from Twit.  He really does try to talk up Whitney's dancing abilities, which must be difficult to do, but he's getting bankrolled for it. 

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