Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage

[TattleTeeny]

So, everyone, happy new year! I thought I'd share something here:

Last night at a party (not a bash, just kind of a small group sitting around and having drinks with the TV on), one of my friends mentioned that the Geico Peter Pan is a total asshole. Everyone agreed, except me and one other person, who both feel that, OK, yes--while he is displaying assholery, it's not on purpose, he's just one of those people who truly has no idea what's appropriate in a social setting. Further (and due to mild tipsiness), we went on to give examples of other people like this (in real life) and then tried to explain how PP probably really thought he was being perfectly fine and complimentary at his reunion and, due to his chronic youth, was probably never taught correctly how to interact. We were (rightfully) given incredulous looks and told we have thought way too much about Peter Pan's upbringing.

Edited January 1, 2016 by TattleTeeny

[NYGirl]

Can I say how much I hate the lady in the GMC commercial where her neighbor is showing her the outside Christmas decorations and she says:  I had to have that and points to her new car.  Then she squeals that it lights up.  I hate her so much.

 

Sorry I can't find the commercial on either youtube or spot.

[ennui]

the Geico Peter Pan is a total asshole. Everyone agreed, except me and one other person, who both feel that, OK, yes--while he is displaying assholery, it's not on purpose

 

I agree, it's not on purpose. He's 12, iirc. The whole point of the commercial is that he's stuck on 12.

[Bastet]

That's exactly why the commercial fails for me -- his "it's what you do" scenario is being Peter Pan and thus staying young forever.  But he's acting like an asshole, not a kid.  Sure, a kid can be an asshole, but so can an adult; nothing about what he's doing is particularly evocative of his age versus any other age.  There's too tenuous a connection between what he's doing and that the fact he's Peter Pan is making him do it to make the commercial funny to me.  If he was being annoying in a way more suggestive of the age-specific ways young teenagers can be annoying, it might work, as most of the "It's what you do" commercials amuse me. 

[Rick Kitchen]

Can I say how much I hate the lady in the GMC commercial where her neighbor is showing her the outside Christmas decorations and she says:  I had to have that and points to her new car.  Then she squeals that it lights up.  I hate her so much.

 

Sorry I can't find the commercial on either youtube or spot.

 

There's another one where a guy is decorating his house with an inflatable snowman and tells his neighbor about how he saved hundreds on the sale, and the neighbor points to his new car and brags that he saved thousands, and that it lights up, too.  Asshole.

[CarpeDiem54]

Can I say how much I hate the lady in the GMC commercial where her neighbor is showing her the outside Christmas decorations and she says: I had to have that and points to her new car. Then she squeals that it lights up. I hate her so much.

Sorry I can't find the commercial on either youtube or spot.

Here it is. I hate that squealing bitch, too. I want to slap her.

http://www.ispot.tv/ad/AoIh/gmc-light-up-reindeer

Edited January 1, 2016 by CarpeDiem54

[Jamoche]

Just saw an ad with a woman making duckface selfies with Mr Clean. Selfies are intrinsically annoying; duckface makes it worse.

[Rick Kitchen]

And here's the GMC ad I was talking about.

 

http://www.ispot.tv/ad/AICf/gmc-holiday-event-quite-the-snowman

[Prevailing Wind]

AUUUGGGHHHHHHHH...Nutrisystems.  "Awesome, delicious meals!"  Wrong on 3 counts.  They're awFUL, not awESOME; they are the polar opposite of delicious; they are too small to even be decent snacks, much less meals.  You lose weight because the stuff's so damn shitty, it puts you off your feed for a month.

[ShellSeeker]

The Dollar Shave Club commercials with the foul, disgusting used razors completely gross me out. I almost want to shower every time I see one.

[CarpeDiem54]

Why the hell are they still playing that Glade commercial where the girl strings some lights on her old neighbor man's house? That song sung by some Sylvester the Cat wannabe makes me beyond stabby.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

When I see Oprah' s WW commercials, I remember her wagon stunt. Anyone else? Oprah came on stage pulling a wagon with 70 pounds of fat in it, to demonstrate her weight loss, with, I believe, Optifast. Later, as the 70 pounds found their way back, she talked about regretting that stunt and how she misled people about dieting. She said diets don't work.

She has talked a lot about yoyo dieting and the dangers, while her weight has gone up and down.

 

Yeah, Oprah's been on the weight-loss train for ages. The Golden Girls even poked fun at her, at that was way back in 1988.

 

Rose Nylund: "What we saw wasn't a plane! A plane isn't that thin or that bright!"

 

Dorothy Zbornak: "Neither is Oprah Winfrey, that doesn't make her a UFO."

[RCharter]

 

Yeah, Oprah's been on the weight-loss train for ages. The Golden Girls even poked fun at her, at that was way back in 1988.

 

Rose Nylund: "What we saw wasn't a plane! A plane isn't that thin or that bright!"

 

Dorothy Zbornak: "Neither is Oprah Winfrey, that doesn't make her a UFO."

A million likes for quoting Golden Girls :)

[InDueTime]

In regards to the Samsung pay phone.  How do they deal with security?  As soon as your phone is stolen do you need to cancel your credit card?  Can't someone hack into your phone?  I'm not fancy enough right now to pay with my cell phone.  Its not too much of a burden for me to carry my wallet into a store with me yet.  It just feels like a potential lawsuit waiting to happen if the right safeguards aren't in place to prevent theft.

I agree.  Plus, if this Samsung pay phone was someone's only way to pay, what happens if the phone battery dies or the phone gets broken?

[CarpeDiem54]

There's a new Viagra hussy! This one must be named Jane. She lives in a treehouse in what must be the loudest jungle in the world. Waiting, waiting for Tarzan to come home.

I can only assume that the reason all of these Viagra Bimbos hang out with these limp-dicked guys is because they're all multi-millionaires. They sure do have spectacular houses to wander around in while waiting for their men to arrive home to pop little blue pills.

[Rick Kitchen]

AUUUGGGHHHHHHHH...Nutrisystems.  "Awesome, delicious meals!"  Wrong on 3 counts.  They're awFUL, not awESOME; they are the polar opposite of delicious; they are too small to even be decent snacks, much less meals.  You lose weight because the stuff's so damn shitty, it puts you off your feed for a month.

 

I endorse this rant.  God, that food is awful.  I did lose weight, but after the first month, I didn't renew, because the food was so awful.

[90PercentGravity]

I lost weight on Nutrisystem but after about 6 months I also started losing my hair.

[Prevailing Wind]

Were you also using WEN products?

[Jamoche]

AUUUGGGHHHHHHHH...Nutrisystems.  "Awesome, delicious meals!"  Wrong on 3 counts.  They're awFUL, not awESOME; they are the polar opposite of delicious; they are too small to even be decent snacks, much less meals.  You lose weight because the stuff's so damn shitty, it puts you off your feed for a month.

Late last night during the Mythbusters marathon, when the ads start getting *really* cheap, I saw a new one: Survivalist food packets. Also supposedly awesome and delicious! Recipes by real chefs! Tastes just like the real thing, even with a shelf life of 25 years! And totally not for doomsday preppers, it's for the aftermath of natural disasters - and did you know, some people are so clueless about natural disaster prepping that they think they can just call 911?

 

Yep. Took one showing to get on my annoying list.

[CarpeDiem54]

A new year, a new stupid Liberty Mutual whiner. This asshole backed into his wife's car. While holding a 10 gallon mug of coffee. Too bad he didn't spill that in his lap and scald his balls.

[MaryPatShelby]

Not to mention the halftime sex............

Kill me now.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

I agree.  Plus, if this Samsung pay phone was someone's only way to pay, what happens if the phone battery dies or the phone gets broken?

 

That reminds me:

 

There's an ad for some company that buys old cell phones, tablets, etc, and it drives me insane because the guy in the commercial is acting like its this huge burden to actually go into a store and sell his phone, that he'd rather do it online or whatever because then he doesn't have to leave the house. Are we really that lazy as a nation now, that we can't even get off our asses and do something that, y'know, gives us extra money?

[theatremouse]

That reminds me:

 

There's an ad for some company that buys old cell phones, tablets, etc, and it drives me insane because the guy in the commercial is acting like its this huge burden to actually go into a store and sell his phone, that he'd rather do it online or whatever because then he doesn't have to leave the house. Are we really that lazy as a nation now, that we can't even get off our asses and do something that, y'know, gives us extra money?

This is clearly not the angle this particular ad was going for, but I think in reality one of the reasons going into a store, for example, to trade in one's phone is deemed less appealing is not the going but in that you take whatever they offer. If you sell online in theory you can potentially get more money, but that's more like...if you sell it yourself like ebay, not some company that probably has fixed rates for each device, same as phone stores do. So yeah, their angle is dumb, as in, for dumb people who won't notice the pitch is pointless.

[xaxat]

A new year, a new stupid Liberty Mutual whiner. This asshole backed into his wife's car. While holding a 10 gallon mug of coffee. Too bad he didn't spill that in his lap and scald his balls.

 

Is that the one with the Black couple? I can't really hate on that one. The woman is gorgeous and quite. . .statuesque. 

 

Yes, that's the phrase I was looking for.

[Sandman87]

Apparently Charmin has toilet paper that's so awesome that you might be able to wear your underwear more than once. Kids, if you need special TP to avoid leaving skid marks, maybe the paper isn't the problem.

[CarpeDiem54]

Is that the one with the Black couple? I can't really hate on that one. The woman is gorgeous and quite. . .statuesque. 

 

Yes, that's the phrase I was looking for.

No, this is a new one with some white puke holding a take out coffee mug.

[Rick Kitchen]

Oh, good Lord.  If I didn't already have diabetes, this would have given it to me.

 

http://www.values.com/inspirational-stories-tv-spots/130-already-there

[Muffyn]

mild to moderate suicide?

I am pretty sure suicide falls into the moderate to severe category automatically.  Then again if a drug has caused your death, please call our law offices.  (Finally saw one in which they clearly corrected that language to make it clear they weren't expecting calls from dead people.  Too bad,  I like to think the zombie apocalypse will be caused by ambulance-chasing attorneys doing drug class action suits featured on commercials.) 

[RCharter]

I am pretty sure suicide falls into the moderate to severe category automatically.  Then again if a drug has caused your death, please call our law offices.  (Finally saw one in which they clearly corrected that language to make it clear they weren't expecting calls from dead people.  Too bad,  I like to think the zombie apocalypse will be caused by ambulance-chasing attorneys doing drug class action suits featured on commercials.) 

I feel like there is a market there.  Just imagine, your loved one, suffering from a 5 hour Viagra erection, gets run over by a Krispy Kreme truck on his way to the doctors office.  

 

You're grieving at their grave, you feel a tap on your shoulder, and you don't quite recognize the guy...maybe he was your great uncle's brother?  perhaps he was a 5th cousin, twice removed?  You expect a generic expression of sympathy, but instead "Hello, I'm from the law offices of x,y, and z.  Your dead husband saw my ad and contacted me last night to represent him as he suffered from a moderate to severe case of death.  Don't worry, I brought my representation agreement, how hard do you think it would be to open the casket so we can get his signature?"

Oh, good Lord.  If I didn't already have diabetes, this would have given it to me.

 

http://www.values.com/inspirational-stories-tv-spots/130-already-there

Well, I'm proud of myself for making it 17 seconds in.  I totally thought the dad was dead and that was the reason mom knew he "missed them."  Whatever, he probably just got back to the hotel room from the strip club.

 

Just kidding, I am sad that I learned nothing valuable about values since I couldn't even make it half a minute into this commercial.

[Prevailing Wind]

I thought the guy was dead, too.  Telling a kid "I'm already there - I'm the sunshine in your hair" is bullshit. Kid ain't buying that.

[Ubiquitous]

I hate the Little Caesars' ad where a studio audience yells, "ONE MORE TIME," and the commercial actually replays at least twice, with the audience yelling, "ONE MORE TIME" three times. Did they think annoying the viewing audience was the way to get them to buy Little Caesars?

You remembered whose commercial it was, so it wasn't a total failure...

 

Oh my Lord, dude. Wipe your stupid drunk face!

Is it just me, or when the camera pulled back at the end, I thought it would reveal him in the back of a police car and he was too drunk to realize he got arrested?

 

I never understood that song. WTF is a "natural" woman?  I used to go around singing, "You make me feel like a synthetic woman..."

I always thought that lyric was "like a man does a woman..."

 

Given the fact that Oprah's weight has fluctuated vastly over the many years she's been on TV does she really have any credibility left when it comes to dieting? Even more so since we know she actually bought a large stake in Weight Watchers and is now shilling for them? Why are we supposed to think this is going to work when everything else she's tried had only temporary results? A better selling point would be specifying what went wrong with all her previous diet plans and why this one is so different it's sure to last forever. She can cut the over-serious philosophizing crap. No, Oprah, you aren't just like everyone else out there with weight issues. You've got more money than God and could pay someone full time to just follow you around 24/7 and slap the food right out of your hand.

I lost all goodwill towards that woman and have despised her since circa 2008. That ad pissed me off so much that I started yelling obscenities at my TV at her waxing philosophical about losing weight. Knowing she recently investing in WW makes me feel justified.

Edited January 3, 2016 by Ubiquitous

[Jamoche]

 

Well, I'm proud of myself for making it 17 seconds in.  I totally thought the dad was dead and that was the reason mom knew he "missed them."  Whatever, he probably just got back to the hotel room from the strip club.

 

Just kidding, I am sad that I learned nothing valuable about values since I couldn't even make it half a minute into this commercial.

Someone needs to remix it with "Cat's in the Cradle"

Edited January 3, 2016 by Jamoche

[smittykins]

That would be a good idea(since I remember hearing "I'm Already There" about 74365734 times when it was popular, and now I'm thoroughly sick of it).

[Muffyn]

I thought the guy was dead, too.  Telling a kid "I'm already there - I'm the sunshine in your hair" is bullshit. Kid ain't buying that.

If that little boy is stupid enough to believe this crap, he's going to have quite a complex when he gets older.  After all his father is already there.  Why he's everywhere.  He is in his hair.  He's in the air.  He's candles and wind and dirt and  . . . When he gets older how will this child ever have a sexual experience when he thinks his father is all around him at all times?  Creepy.  He won't be able to yank off a quickie in the shower for fear his father's in the soap.  

[Ubiquitous]

Those ads for Candy Crush knock-off games which feature people hallucinating about their lame video games is beyond annoying.

Edited January 4, 2016 by Ubiquitous

[mojoween]

There is an ad for a car or something, I don't even know, where the woman's internal monologue is so bitchy, capped off with "yoga pants are pants", that I want to punch her in the throat.

I mean, I get it, my internal voiceover could often get me fired, divorced, and/or imprisoned, but that doesn't mean I want to hear it vocalized in a commercial. It certainly doesn't make me want to buy something.

[Amethyst]

I never understood that song. WTF is a "natural" woman?  I used to go around singing, "You make me feel like a synthetic woman..."

 

I'm imagining a robot from Futurama singing it this way too, and it would totally make sense.

[blackwing]

I loathe the commercial with Horseface Julia Roberts and whatever perfume she is hawking.  Can't stand her.  When the lady announcer starts off with saying "in a world" all I could hear was ".... where Denzel Washington does not have an Oscar for Best Actor".  I despise Julia Roberts and her huge wide mouth full of teeth.

[mmecorday]

I am not a huge Julia Roberts fan either, and I have a feeling this commercial is going to be her White Diamonds, in that we're going to see it every Christmas even long after she's dead.

[Brattinella]

I loathe the commercial with Horseface Julia Roberts and whatever perfume she is hawking.  Can't stand her.  When the lady announcer starts off with saying "in a world" all I could hear was ".... where Denzel Washington does not have an Oscar for Best Actor".  I despise Julia Roberts and her huge wide mouth full of teeth.

 

Cringe-worthy!

I am not a huge Julia Roberts fan either, and I have a feeling this commercial is going to be her White Diamonds, in that we're going to see it every Christmas even long after she's dead.

 

Seriously, what thought/feeling is behind Julia's LEERING grin at the very end??  I'm so hot?  I beat them all?  I'm high as a kite?

I just hate this ad.

[proserpina65]

AUUUGGGHHHHHHHH...Nutrisystems.  "Awesome, delicious meals!"  Wrong on 3 counts.  They're awFUL, not awESOME; they are the polar opposite of delicious; they are too small to even be decent snacks, much less meals.  You lose weight because the stuff's so damn shitty, it puts you off your feed for a month.

Plus, it's a lot easier to lose weight when you just eat the meals you have to buy from the program; it's learning how to eat nutritionally in real life that's the hard part.  Some of us will struggle with that for the rest of our lives.  I like to yell at Marie Osmond that she'll gain those fifty pounds back when she has to start eating real food.

 

I do wonder, while watching the Nutrisystem for Men ads, if I could do that and feel satisfied, because from what I've seen of the meals in the regular program, I'd be starving all the time.

[mmecorday]

The NutriSystem ads with Dan Marino are from the devil. Each time he says, "Put down that pie!" I want to hit him with a frozen leg of lamb.

[RCharter]

The NutriSystem ads with Dan Marino are from the devil. Each time he says, "Put down that pie!" I want to hit him with a frozen leg of lamb.

but I like pie :(  

 

let's compromise, I'll put the pie down after I'm done eating it.

[peacheslatour]

Is that the one with the Black couple? I can't really hate on that one. The woman is gorgeous and quite. . .statuesque. 

 

Yes, that's the phrase I was looking for.

I like them both, the guy is pretty cute too. For a Liberty Mutual commercial, it's rather charming.

[St. Claire]

Well, since her ads started running more people have signed up for WW.

 

There is always a dramatic increase in WW and other weight loss programs after Christmas. I wonder if this year's increase is comparable to most other years'? I actually like Weight Watchers, since nothing is really off limits and there is a focus on just being aware of the choices about what to eat and how much to be active. I'm back on it, thanks to quite a long time of not moving and eating everything in sight regardless of whether I was actually hungry, so I am one of those lame folks who is feeding into their perfect business model ;-)

 

 

That reminds me:

 

There's an ad for some company that buys old cell phones, tablets, etc, and it drives me insane because the guy in the commercial is acting like its this huge burden to actually go into a store and sell his phone, that he'd rather do it online or whatever because then he doesn't have to leave the house. Are we really that lazy as a nation now, that we can't even get off our asses and do something that, y'know, gives us extra money?

I hate that guy! The way he's all "I did it without having to [visible shudder] go to the store!" If you are that bothered by going out in public, you should probably be evaluated for agoraphobia or social anxiety disorder.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

The NutriSystem ads with Dan Marino are from the devil. Each time he says, "Put down that pie!" I want to hit him with a frozen leg of lamb.

 

There's a new ad out now, although I don't know if its for NutriSystem or not. But it is annoying. Kirstie Alley, John Ratzenberger and George Wendt are gatheered on the old Cheers set, and she's behind the bar like she's slinging drinks, only she's really shilling for some weight-loss crap. Like Oprah, Kirstie has been on the 'Try this diet!' path for eight hundred and twenty six years, or so it seems, so its incredibly obnoxious that now she's back again hawking some diet food that probably tastes like shit.

[iMonrey]

 

I read an interesting article the other day, I wish I could remember where, that said that WW has the best business model. People lose weight on WW, and then get off the program for whatever reason. And left to their own devices, they gain weight. So then sign back up for WW. It's a vicious cycle and WW just keeps getting rich off of the same people's money over and over and over.

 

That's true of any diet, though - once you lose the weight you want, if you go back to eating the way you used to, of course you're going to gain the weight back. You have to change the way you eat forever, not just until you lose the amount of weight you're hoping for. So it's not really fair to blame any one particular diet.

 

The thing is, Oprah knows that, I'm sure. She's not dumb. Her ad bugs me because her issues with weight are well known to the general public and nothing about this ad explains why this time, unlike all the other times, this is going to work for her. It's just basically saying "I'm going to do this now. Do it with me!" Sort of relies on her legions of fans just doing whatever she tells them without explanation. Plus it's been much publicized that she bought a controlling interest in the Weight Watchers company, which also makes the ad somewhat disingenuous.

[peacheslatour]

There is always a dramatic increase in WW and other weight loss programs after Christmas. I wonder if this year's increase is comparable to most other years'? I actually like Weight Watchers, since nothing is really off limits and there is a focus on just being aware of the choices about what to eat and how much to be active. I'm back on it, thanks to quite a long time of not moving and eating everything in sight regardless of whether I was actually hungry, so I am one of those lame folks who is feeding into their perfect business model ;-)

 

I hate that guy! The way he's all "I did it without having to [visible shudder] go to the store!" If you are that bothered by going out in public, you should probably be evaluated for agoraphobia or social anxiety disorder.

Here's the thing, though, young people are used to doing everything online.  They (at least the ones I know) really don't like to go into brick and mortar stores.  Millennials would rather not deal with face to face encounters. That's just the way of the world now.

[RCharter]

That's true of any diet, though - once you lose the weight you want, if you go back to eating the way you used to, of course you're going to gain the weight back. You have to change the way you eat forever, not just until you lose the amount of weight you're hoping for. So it's not really fair to blame any one particular diet.

 

The thing is, Oprah knows that, I'm sure. She's not dumb. Her ad bugs me because her issues with weight are well known to the general public and nothing about this ad explains why this time, unlike all the other times, this is going to work for her. It's just basically saying "I'm going to do this now. Do it with me!" Sort of relies on her legions of fans just doing whatever she tells them without explanation. Plus it's been much publicized that she bought a controlling interest in the Weight Watchers company, which also makes the ad somewhat disingenuous.

I see your point about assuming she has mindless fans.  But the charm of her (to me) is that she doesn't feel preachy and I think listing reasons why this time is different might come off a bit condescending.  I mean normally diets do work to take off the weight, its the maintenance that Oprah has had a tough time with and if I were her, after all her failures I wouldn't make any definitive statements about how its going to work this time.  I think her fans like her, as a person, so they would love to do anything with her, and if they want to lose weight anyways....win/win.

[bigskygirl]

Kirstie Alley is doing a weight loss ad now. I do not know who is more obnoxious-her or Marie Osmond. They both can leave my television at any time.