S04.E13: Lupe's Story

[HalcyonDays]

Episode synopsis: Lupe has spent the last 10 years in bed and is totally dependent on her husband, prompting a cross-country move that could save her life or end up backfiring.

 

[Muffyn]

Her husband married her when she was already bed bound because she said God would send her someone to take care of her.  That was the moment I thought my head might explode. 

[Armchair Critic]

Broken toilet seat and a cheating husband.....

 

This one was a doozy! Then at the end she acted like she was really doing something being outside in the park... but she was in a WHEELCHAIR.

[Morgalisa]

Poor Lupe. I fear for her life. I can't foresee a good outcome on this one.

[Katt]

Her husband had already checked out before they moved to TX. 

[Hero]

The husband was totally over-doing the lovey-dovey stuff at the end. He was trying way too hard to be into her. He can't wait until she can walk so he can leave and she knows this. That is why she mysteriously stopped walking after she found out that he was cheating.

I feel terrible in saying this, but part of me doesn't blame him for cheating. Lupe took advantage of him and ate herself into oblivion, while playing the "woe is me" card. But, Gilbert married her when she was 400lbs and she lied about her weight saying that she was 200lbs. What did he think would happen while feeding her crap all day?

Also, the lame-ass excuse of "I don't know how to cook/ eat healthy foods." Bullshit. It's 2016 and we have the internet and books. I'm pretty sure Dr.Now gives them a meal plan. They are just too lazy to do anything.

Her husband had already checked out before they moved to TX.

Definitely. He looked like he wanted to strangle her when they were driving to Texas.

[Katt]

I'm not entirely sure he wanted her to get better. I hate to say it, but I think he'd have welcomed her not making it. 

[Hero]

Poor Lupe. I fear for her life. I can't foresee a good outcome on this one.

Me either. Her heart is so weak that if she backtracks a little, she'll most likely die.

I'm not entirely sure he wanted her to get better. I hate to say it, but I think he'd have welcomed her not making it.

I agree with you. He seemed tired and just run down. She refused to walk and her not doing that meant that he has to stay with her. He was looking for an out, and her walking was it.

[Armchair Critic]

There's no delicate way to say this so here goes... couldn't Lupe still give her husband oral sex or at least a hand job? Not that I am blaming her for his cheating because he did marry her knowing her situation, but maybe if she threw the guy a bone he would be less likely to be "flirting". And yes I know some men are just dogs even when they are treated like gold by their wives, just throwing that out there.

 

[/ducking for cover]

[Katt]

**Ducking too** I thought the same thing...

[Armchair Critic]

I should probably quit while I am ahead... but did you see the ummm... mess on the toilet seat and down the toilet? I don't know if she did that, but it would make getting stuck on the toilet even more humiliating (if that is possible). 

[Lightning]

I had to shut my eyes.  I did notice her niece getting the car ready for the trip to Texas -- putting a plastic tarp over the seat and then "pee pads" on top of that?  I had to laugh -- one time when he was helping her up off the bed, the pee pad got stuck in her butt crack.  (yeah, save room for me on the bus to Hell).  As for the caregivers not "knowing" what healthy food is -- bs.  It's just easier to go to Taco Bell than to go to the store and buy veggies.   I'm glad he finally "got it" at the end, but I think he realized that his ticket out was her getting mobile.   He probably welcomed those walks to the grocery store before they got a car in Texas -- time away from her.    On a more serious note, one thing I noticed about Lupe is that she seemed to be way too flat in the bed with her head down.  Most overweight people are more comfortable with the head of the bed raised in some way -- either an adjustable bed, or plenty of pillows put in behind the upper back.    Aside from her needing to be attended to every five minutes -- that incessant whining and crying was really getting to me.   No wonder the husband was ready to bolt.  

[Noirprncess]

I am not quite halfway thru but I don't see this ending well.

 

Some gems so far:

 

"I like healthy food but it's not comfort food."  I haven't seen you eat anything near healthy.  

 

She was wedged into the car like when I pack IKEA furniture into my Mini and sitting on "wee-wee" pads.  The image of her husband running into the store in disgust with her stinky used "wee-wee" pad.  Blech!

 

Her claiming she has to live at least ONE day then eating a million calories on her B-day.  Only to find out she's GAINED nearly 100 pounds in the month she was home.  Guess it was more than living one day, huh Chica?

 

I think her husband was secreting hoping she would eat herself into a food coma.  He probably has some quickie insurance on her.

 

Wait, hold up.  They are living in a HOTEL?  no car?  What happened to the niece who was "living" with them in Texas?

[notyrmomma]

Hi - I'm going to hop on the bus to hell right now too...

 

There's no delicate way to say this so here goes... couldn't Lupe still give her husband oral sex or at least a hand job? Not that I am blaming her for his cheating because he did marry her knowing her situation, but maybe if she threw the guy a bone he would be less likely to be "flirting". And yes I know some men are just dogs even when they are treated like gold by their wives, just throwing that out there.

 

[/ducking for cover]

I had this exact thought.  I was trying to imagine the logistics of it. Bottom line, the husband was a pig, lack of sex does not a marriage vow break (in sickness and in health...).  No one ever died from not having sex. I also believe they were Christians, which makes it much worse.  Besides, her predicament is at least half his fault.  Either way, if that were me, I would say look hun, help me out for this next year, then be on your way.

 

I'm not entirely sure he wanted her to get better. I hate to say it, but I think he'd have welcomed her not making it. 

I didn't think she would....Much "healthier" people have died from this surgery (although she got the sleeve which is a little safer due to no malabsorption--which is probably why Dr. Now did that surgery).

 

I should probably quit while I am ahead... but did you see the ummm... mess on the toilet seat and down the toilet? I don't know if she did that, but it would make getting stuck on the toilet even more humiliating (if that is possible). 

Wow, good eyes.  I didn't see that.  Yikes.  But of all the toilet seats in the world to break, you break Dr. Now's???? I bet that seat has seen way bigger people.

 

 

I had to shut my eyes.  I did notice her niece getting the car ready for the trip to Texas -- putting a plastic tarp over the seat and then "pee pads" on top of that?  I had to laugh -- one time when he was helping her up off the bed, the pee pad got stuck in her butt crack.  (yeah, save room for me on the bus to Hell).  

How many freaking times did they stop for food on that first day?  It had to be like four.  She would die if she were on a road trip with my husband, if you don't run and pee when we stop for gas, then you are screwed because we don't stop. Fast Food? Hell no!  Grab a sandwich out of the cooler and shut up.  LOL  Also, instead of a pee bed, we have a pee car seat....she's eating where she pees.  How did she poop???

 

What pissed me off was her family that brought her all that crap for her birthday.  40th birthday or not, what the hell was wrong with them?  Still, a person doesn't gain 80 lbs during one "cheat day."

[OhioMom]

Her husband had already checked out before they moved to TX. 

YES!  At that point, he was just in it for his 15 minutes of fame.

I'm not entirely sure he wanted her to get better. I hate to say it, but I think he'd have welcomed her not making it. 

Yeah...I was wondering if he was the beneficiary on her life insurance policy. If she had one.

There's no delicate way to say this so here goes... couldn't Lupe still give her husband oral sex or at least a hand job? Not that I am blaming her for his cheating because he did marry her knowing her situation, but maybe if she threw the guy a bone he would be less likely to be "flirting". And yes I know some men are just dogs even when they are treated like gold by their wives, just throwing that out there.

 

[/ducking for cover]

Oh, I'm sure that was going on.  I mean, she kept saying how "grateful" she was to him for all he does for her....gotta be some tit for tat going on there.  There's no way the guy would hang around with no benefits. Although, to be fair, he seemed to have his own issues going on.  He didn't drive.   Did he lose his license, or never have one?  Why didn't they have a car? Did all their money go to fast food?  He also seemed to have an anger problem.

 

Hi - I'm going to hop on the bus to hell right now too...

 

I had this exact thought.  I was trying to imagine the logistics of it. Bottom line, the husband was a pig, lack of sex does not a marriage vow break (in sickness and in health...).  No one ever died from not having sex. I also believe they were Christians, which makes it much worse.  Besides, her predicament is at least half his fault.  Either way, if that were me, I would say look hun, help me out for this next year, then be on your way.

 

I didn't think she would....Much "healthier" people have died from this surgery (although she got the sleeve which is a little safer due to no malabsorption--which is probably why Dr. Now did that surgery).

 

Wow, good eyes.  I didn't see that.  Yikes.  But of all the toilet seats in the world to break, you break Dr. Now's???? I bet that seat has seen way bigger people.

 

 

How many freaking times did they stop for food on that first day?  It had to be like four.  She would die if she were on a road trip with my husband, if you don't run and pee when we stop for gas, then you are screwed because we don't stop. Fast Food? Hell no!  Grab a sandwich out of the cooler and shut up.  LOL  Also, instead of a pee bed, we have a pee car seat....she's eating where she pees.  How did she poop???

 

What pissed me off was her family that brought her all that crap for her birthday.  40th birthday or not, what the hell was wrong with them?  Still, a person doesn't gain 80 lbs during one "cheat day."

Then there was the family going away party.  Fried chicken.  Some type of high fat, high carb potato bake.  Really?  You're having a going away party for your relative who weighs over 600 pounds, and can't even walk.  Let's all shove fried chicken in our faces.  These people have no clue.  Her niece (the driver) looked almost as bad as she did.

 

My 8 year old daughter, who was watching the show before this one couldn't figure out which person was the one getting  the surgery. I can't recall which patient that was.

 

Lupe's husband was so disgusted with those "pee rags", wasn't he?  Not that I blame him.  I can't even imagine what that car smelled like at the end of the trip.

 

And...showing menstrual blood?  That's a new all-time low for TLC.

Edited March 24, 2016 by OhioMom

[Noirprncess]

Sadly, while I don't condone cheating at all - I do feel bad for Gilbert.  The same way I did for that chick that got involved with the overweight lesbian in a previous episode.  I think they might genuinely be ok with the person's weight until they realize that the bed-bound person has very little incentive to get up out of that bed and basically baits them into a lifestyle they didn't expect or really want.  Who goes into a relationship expecting to be the housemaid/nursemaid and total caregiver to person who's demanding and totally dependent on you for every possible thing.

 

Reserve room on that bus because even when down 200-300 pounds, Lupe looked the same to me except around her trach hole and flapping chins.

 

Also, Dr. Now was telling her that THIS was her wake up call.  I disagree, she had her wake up call 10 years ago when she went into a diabetic coma and needed a trach hole to keep from drowning in her own body fat.  She just choose to go back to sleep then and eat her way to a miracle.

[Katt]

OhioMom - "My 8 year old daughter, who was watching the show before this one couldn't figure out which person was the one getting  the surgery. I can't recall which patient that was."
I LOL'd so hard when I read that. It's the same in every episode. 

[dahling]

Well, wasn't that spectacularly unsatisfying?

 

With a 2 hour special I thought we were going to get more follow up, more weight loss, more success. Instead we got 2 hours of histronics, weeping, crying, and of cheating Gilbert.  I didn't understand the part in the hospital where she said she called him and he thought she was another woman.  Don't they have cell phones, you know the kind with Caller ID?  This is not a new concept.  And if you were cheating, ok, "flirting" with other women, wouldn't you make double sure it's not your wife on the phone when you answer?  Gilbert's a cheater, he's going to cheat even if she weighs 125 lbs, and also, in the immortal words of the Eagles, he's already gone. 

 

Lupe did look practically the same after 300 pounds of weight loss.  Bizarre.  Get up and walk, woman.

[Noirprncess]

Well, wasn't that spectacularly unsatisfying?

 

With a 2 hour special I thought we were going to get more follow up, more weight loss, more success. Instead we got 2 hours of histronics, weeping, crying, and of cheating Gilbert.  I didn't understand the part in the hospital where she said she called him and he thought she was another woman.  Don't they have cell phones, you know the kind with Caller ID?  This is not a new concept.  And if you were cheating, ok, "flirting" with other women, wouldn't you make double sure it's not your wife on the phone when you answer?  Gilbert's a cheater, he's going to cheat even if she weighs 125 lbs, and also, in the immortal words of the Eagles, he's already gone. 

 

Lupe did look practically the same after 300 pounds of weight loss.  Bizarre.  Get up and walk, woman.

 

Neither of them seemed particularly bright.  I imagine him using a cheap burner phone (flip phone) for his cheating calls.  He answered the phone all wrong not realizing it was his wife calling.

 

Or him butt dialing and telling on himself.

 

But, I think the more likely scenario was the onsite producer or production team tattled on Gilbert in order to create "drama".  Otherwise it's just two hours of her whining and laying in bed starting a fresh bed sore.  

[Sir RaiderDuck OMS]

How many freaking times did they stop for food on that first day?  It had to be like four.

Good lord. And the food they were getting? At one point, they handed Lupe a large Carl's Jr. (or Hardee's -- they're owned by the same people and have the same "star" logo) milkshake. I just checked the Carl's Jr website. One of those shakes has 710 calories all by itself.

That milkshake was where I found myself getting actively angry with her. NOBODY will freaking die if they don't get a goddamned milkshake. And with her constant whining on top of everything? Stick her in a nursing home or arrange for in-home care, take off, and be done with her.

[Jeeves]

Well, wasn't that spectacularly unsatisfying?

 

With a 2 hour special I thought we were going to get more follow up, more weight loss, more success. Instead we got 2 hours of histronics, weeping, crying, and of cheating Gilbert. ...  Gilbert's a cheater, he's going to cheat even if she weighs 125 lbs, and also, in the immortal words of the Eagles, he's already gone. 

 

Lupe did look practically the same after 300 pounds of weight loss.  Bizarre.  Get up and walk, woman.

 

I agree. Thank goodness for the FF key on my DVR. I had this on live while I was mostly working in another room where I could hear the TV. Usually I ignore any TV sounds if I want to, but the constant whining, crying, and hollering on this episode was so annoying, I went into the other room and turned off the TV. Did a quick flip through the recorded episode to see if I'd missed anything. I fear that Lupe, with her damaged heart, isn't long for this world, and I wish her well. But, gosh, what a mess her life is. She was given a rare and golden opportunity to work with Dr. Now and his people to rescue her physical health but she just didn't seem emotionally/mentally able to handle it. I agree with whoever upthread, pointed out that her failure to get up on her feet was related to the state of her marriage. She walks, and then he walks (out). So sad.

[Cherrio]

I agree her heart will give out.    Drastic changes and abuse of the body often cause cardiac arrest, from the heaviest to the thinnest as in an anorexic.

            I got a slight vibe of Gilbert maybe one of those men who have a fat fetish?    He seemed fine before she lost some weight.     I am probably wrong, but something was not said or shown, or probably producer created drama which made the episode wonky. 

             I think a lot of these cases like Lupe, Penny and some of the others never talk about how some of the behaviors and refusal to get out of bed are due to losing their free ride aka medicaid and disability. I think it plays a big part in their refusal to recover.

[Pepper Mostly]

We could have had two hours of someone likeable, like Chad, or Milla or even Teretha. Think of how we would have cheered! But we got two hours of Lupe's histrionics and Gilbert's pitiful "cheating". Sigh. She was really sad but not likeable at all, and, as noirprincess points out, not too bright. How can they stand just lying in bed all day and shoveling down junk food? Read a book for cryin out loud. Crochet. Do crossword puzzles. Go online and learn something about healthy eating and nutrition. Jesus. Watching Lupe shove all that junk food down her maw was really off-putting. Full disclosure, I was having a rough morning so I bought myself a cheese danish as a treat on my way to work. I don't object to treating myself or to others indulging from time to time. But buckets of chicken, entire sheet cakes, enough fast food burritos for a family of five? Whut?

 

I quit eating fast food years ago. I never ate a lot but we'd go to Mickey D's on Friday nights sometimes, stuff like that. After a month or two, the very thought of it made me sick-it doesn't look appetizing and I never, ever want it, even if other people are eating it around me. Like smokers who quit can't abide the smell. So I always think that once they've been eating healthy or at least lower calorie for awhile, they'd be re-thinking fast food and realizing how gross it is. But that is never the case. It just seems weird to me that no one has ever become put off by fast food. They still crave it. That shit must be more powerful than heroin.

Edited March 24, 2016 by Pepper Mostly

[Hero]

There's no delicate way to say this so here goes... couldn't Lupe still give her husband oral sex or at least a hand job? Not that I am blaming her for his cheating because he did marry her knowing her situation, but maybe if she threw the guy a bone he would be less likely to be "flirting". And yes I know some men are just dogs even when they are treated like gold by their wives, just throwing that out there.

[/ducking for cover]

I was thinking the same thing! Lol! But, Lupe could barely breathe, especially when she has something in her mouth. We saw this when she was eating. Her stomach was also really big. Her body was really round. I honestly don't think she had/has the stamina to do oral sex or even give him a handjob.

[CousinOliver]

Well, wasn't that spectacularly unsatisfying?

 

With a 2 hour special I thought we were going to get more follow up, more weight loss, more success. Instead we got 2 hours of histronics, weeping, crying, and of cheating Gilbert.  I didn't understand the part in the hospital where she said she called him and he thought she was another woman.  Don't they have cell phones, you know the kind with Caller ID?  This is not a new concept.  And if you were cheating, ok, "flirting" with other women, wouldn't you make double sure it's not your wife on the phone when you answer?  Gilbert's a cheater, he's going to cheat even if she weighs 125 lbs, and also, in the immortal words of the Eagles, he's already gone. 

 

Lupe did look practically the same after 300 pounds of weight loss.  Bizarre.  Get up and walk, woman.

 

More weight loss?  She lost 300 lbs in a year (or 400, since she lost that first 100 twice.)  I think that's about the most success we've seen on this show, especially for a woman participant.  Now, I couldn't actually SEE the weight loss in her like I could in a lot of other people, but that's not her fault. 

[Barb23]

I thought we would see more being a 2 hr episode. I can't believe Dr Now waited til after the surgery to get them psychiatric help. If anyone needed it before, it was her. She definitely used food as a way to pacify herself. Dr Now should have realized this after the first time these people fail & gain instead of losing. This family needed help with food addiction as well as their marital issues with one feeding off the other. (No pun intended)

This couple was definitely dirt poor & seemed like they depended on family. I can't figure out how members of the extended family showed up for her surgery. Had they also moved to Texas?

I was waiting for that wheelchair to collapse the way she kept flopping into it. Plus the way they had to be rough with it getting it thru doorways surely had to loosen the bolts somewhat. Gabriel got a workout each time he had to push her in it.

I can definitely understand the frustration in the drive but how did they think she would fare being squeezed in like a sardine? And yes, that car had to smell between the bathroom smells as well as fast food wrappers. That niece was nice for driving them in her car but couldn't TLC have rented a van for them? I was wondering too about Gabriel not driving in the move. He evidently could drive if they got a rental car later on. I'm thinking the niece may be one of those people that don't want others driving her car. Can't blame her.

[jennyf]

I really truly hope that psychological help was offered before month 11 or 12 and it was just edited the way we saw it. How many hundreds of thousands of dollars of bills did she run up with all of the emergency care, heart-monitoring, in-patient restricted diets, etc? If people were offered quality psychological care at the beginning and throughout their journeys, it would be a better setup for success. It drove me crazy to see her relapsing over and over and over again, and acting so helpless.

But one of the things she said that really rang true was about wanting Gilbert to take care of her -- I can't remember exactly how she phrased it. Even though he was a cheater, she felt she had no other options than to stay with him and to be bedridden so he would have no choice but to be her caregiver. So messed up.

[CousinOliver]

I'm glad you mentioned the therapy, Barb23.  It seems to me that the therapist and Lupe knew each other, based on the way that they greeted one another.  That was not a "meeting for the first time" kind of greeting, but more a "great to see you again" greeting (although the again wasn't said, specifically.)  

 

I'm not sure why they are so hush-hush about the psych evals on this show.  I'd guess that they do not want to scare people off from seeking surgery (I know a few people that said it was the worst, most arduous part) or if, maybe, these patients wouldn't actually pass a psych eval under non-televised situations, but they let it slide because it's good TV?  I'm just speculating here, but reality show participants get a psych eval before getting onto shows, and WLS patients get a fairly thorough psych eval, so it makes no sense that these patients would have neither. 

[ClareWalks]

I haven't seen the episode, but let me get this straight - it's the season finale, and all season we've had a parade of at least semi-likeable people, then they decide to finish the season on the lowest-possible low notes with Sean and Lupe? What the hell? Why not put one or both of them in the middle?

[islandgal140]

All I got is: What's eating Gilbert?

 

 

I'll see myself out.

Edited March 24, 2016 by islandgal140

[islandgal140]

But one of the things she said that really rang true was about wanting Gilbert to take care of her -- I can't remember exactly how she phrased it. Even though he was a cheater, she felt she had no other options than to stay with him and to be bedridden so he would have no choice but to be her caregiver. So messed up.

 

I thought Gilbert bore a striking resemblance to the father that walked out on her.  When they first flashed the dad's pic on the screen, I thought it was Gilbert.

 

I felt sorry for the niece and her car. That couldn't have been good for the suspension, not to mention being urine soaked.

 

I about died when two lonely EMT showed up and basically said without saying that they were going to need more men and called the fire department. How embarrassing. 

[Ocean Chick]

Man, all that crying and whining was just working my last nerve.  Such a sad episode, someone on the verge of death unwilling or unable to help themselves.  I new that she had gained weight after her first going home time, even if they hadn't shown her eating all that horrible food for her birthday.  And yes, what were those people thinking, bringing that type of food to someone who is supposed to be losing weight?  Just stupid.  I don't condone cheating in the least, but yes, I agree that Gilbert is only waiting until she's mobile and then he's outta there.  He's put in his time and wants to be a free man.  Ten plus years of listening to that whine would make me want to flee as well.

 

I can't wait for follow-up on her.

[Sir RaiderDuck OMS]

I can definitely understand the frustration in the drive but how did they think she would fare being squeezed in like a sardine? And yes, that car had to smell between the bathroom smells as well as fast food wrappers. That niece was nice for driving them in her car but couldn't TLC have rented a van for them? I was wondering too about Gabriel not driving in the move. He evidently could drive if they got a rental car later on. I'm thinking the niece may be one of those people that don't want others driving her car. Can't blame her.

Dr. Now even said if the ride had been another two or three hours, she might well have died in the car.

I can totally understand the niece not wanting someone else to drive her car. I was brought up to never let ANYONE else drive your car: if someone else drives your car and gets into a wreck, it's usually YOUR insurance that will take the hit, not theirs.

The solution to both problems would have been to rent a larger car or minivan. Then again, you'd have to be extra super-duper careful with the pee pads.

[IOU Payne]

If there was an award for America's Most Mortified, Lupe would be the Grand Champion.  Never have I seen such a collection of mishaps related to bodily function recorded on camera.  I'd shrivel in shame over having that footage shown on TV if that were me. 

 

Gilbert needs to get to a caregiver burnout support group.  He's beyond done, and if he were related to me, I'd be offering him a couch to crash on so he could get outta Dodge.  The only condition would be me getting to spend five minutes with Lupe, dangling a sack of burgers in front of her like a cat toy and then jerking it away. 

[petalfrog]

 

I thought Gilbert bore a striking resemblance to the father that walked out on her.  When they first flashed the dad's pic on the screen, I thought it was Gilbert.

I totally agree with this and found it be an eerily close resemblance. I missed the first hour and only came in when Gilbert was walking to the grocery store so had a slightly misguided view of him being supportive rather than enabling. He seemed to put on some weight once they moved into the little house and rented a car, probably because he wasn't walking a few miles every couple days with heavy grocery bags. I couldn't help but wonder what would happen to Lupe if Gilbert did indeed leave. Could he be arrested for abandonment of a vulnerable adult? Would she be placed in a nursing home? Would she just wallow and die alone in the house? Practically, what would become of her?

 

I had also missed the tracheostomy story and was utterly fascinated by her chin. I couldn't figure it out but then we watched the first segment of the episode on the repeat right after the initial airing and I learned about the tracheostomy. I was also fascinated to see her in her pink dress... so perfectly round!

 

I also was horrified that once again it seems Dr. Now waits until the last second for psychological care (he even said "as a last chance...") but agree with the poster who said she and the psychologist clearly knew each other. I wish again he'd have these 600lb folks and their families in behavioral/health psychology to address the food addiction behaviors with structured contingency plans, alternate coping skills, etc. I agree she may have relapsed less and therefore spent less time in the hospital.

[Sir RaiderDuck OMS]

The only condition would be me getting to spend five minutes with Lupe, dangling a sack of burgers in front of her like a cat toy and then jerking it away.

If he cared about her so much, STOP BRINGING HER SO MUCH FOOD. If she wants lunch from Taco Bell, great! Bring her two chicken soft tacos, or maybe three, with either a diet soda or water. That's it until dinner. And make sure anybody she could call to get her more food knows the plan.

If she wants anything else, then she can get up and go get it.

Edited March 24, 2016 by Sir RaiderDuck OMS

[chakajo]

this episode was more disgusting than others. I'm sorry to say that. But menstrual blood, you would think she would know.at least next week they will be showing Melissa and a follow-up and what she's going through. I can't wait to see that.

[CousinOliver]

If he cared about her so much, STOP BRINGING HER SO MUCH FOOD. If she wants lunch from Taco Bell, great! Bring her two chicken soft tacos, or maybe three, with either a diet soda or water. That's it until dinner. And make sure anybody she could call to get her more food knows the plan.

If she wants anything else, then she can get up and go get it.

 

Truly!  I remember being on weight watchers and my "cheat" day was Sunday (where I fed some kind of craving without actually going over calories or points or whatever the hell WW was counting at the time.)  I used to have THREE regular old soft tacos and I was still well within my limits for the day (with eating a normal WW friendly breakfast and dinner.)  Sometimes I couldn't even finish, but I know that's because I had been dieting long term; I'm not making any claim that the patients who have just started dieting, before surgery, would be full on that amount of food. 

 

Although I do suspect some of the patients taper off, but they are eating so much food it's still a calorie overage.  Like, if they're going from 4 burgers and 2 fries to 2 burgers and 1 order of fries, they probably think they're doing good.  But, if they're going to stick with fast food, they really need to be getting the kids meal with a water.  

[Sir RaiderDuck OMS]

I couldn't help but wonder what would happen to Lupe if Gilbert did indeed leave. Could he be arrested for abandonment of a vulnerable adult? Would she be placed in a nursing home? Would she just wallow and die alone in the house? Practically, what would become of her?

I think it would depend on whether he's her official caregiver (and the laws on this vary from state to state). If he's not, then he'd still have to contact somebody to check in on her and make arrangements with some public services agency. Or maybe he could leave the door unlocked, call the police department from the road after he's left, and request a Wellness Check. The police officer will see her bedridden with nobody to help her, and probably call an ambulance. Now if he IS her official caregiver, he'd have to arrange for a replacement. Again, it depends on what the laws are where they live.

[Atia]

Sex is not in the marriage vow, but lack of sex is a reason for divorce, at least in NY. It is called alienation of affection and is grounds for divorce. I know because that's what my ex claimed even though it wasn't true. I agreed because I just wanted him to go away.

Edited to add: There are no grounds for mean , nasty, drunk. So I took the fall!

Edited March 24, 2016 by Atia

[Sir RaiderDuck OMS]

Sex is not in the marriage vow, but lack of sex is a reason for divorce, at least in NY. It is called alienation of affection and is grounds for divorce. I know because that's what my ex claimed even though it wasn't true. I agreed because I just wanted him to go away.

Edited to add: There are no grounds for mean , nasty, drunk. So I took the fall!

They don't have No-Fault Divorce in New York? I live in Arizona and when my wife and I were divorced, I filed and there was no "reason" listed anywhere. You just filed and said you wanted a divorce. There wasn't even a space to put down a reason if you wanted to.

[operalover]

Was this 2 hours? My dvr cut this off at One Hour when the husband was online with the chicks. I didn't see any ending here. Help!! I was wondering as 30 minutes of the one hour episode was spent on their car trip and her pee pee pads.

[dahling]

There was no happy ending.  She got down to 360 lbs but still could not/refused to walk. It ended with Gilbert taking her to the park in a wheelchair, like that was a victory.  It was marginally better than she started, but still depressing as hell. 

[Pepper Mostly]

 

Gilbert needs to get to a caregiver burnout support group.  He's beyond done, and if he were related to me, I'd be offering him a couch to crash on so he could get outta Dodge.  The only condition would be me getting to spend five minutes with Lupe, dangling a sack of burgers in front of her like a cat toy and then jerking it away. 

Can I just say that this made me snort very unattractively?

[Mrs. P.]

As a Type 2 diabetic who has to severely restrict carbs to keep my blood sugar under 120, I was horrified at the opening scene when Lupe tested her blood sugar sugar - 475! - and injected her insulin. Then later as she was scarfing down enough food for 4 people, she said that she'd just take some more insulin. My God! She must have no understanding of what that behavior is doing to her body.

In fact, when she was whining about not being able to stand because her legs were numb, I wondered whether the numbness was just a ploy to avoid the effort of standing, or if it was real - a result of nerve damage due to her uncontrolled diabetes.

I felt bad for her. This was such a humiliating exhibition. Getting stuck on a toilet and needing 6 big men just to get her off. Passing menstrual blood and not even realizing it. Just awful for her.

[MsSilverSpecs]

I just couldn't with this woman. I always give these people the benefit of the doubt and I tried with her..but her hysterics just got me so irritated!

She comes home and gains 80lbs in a month. To me, that was like a slap in the face of the people helping her.

I agree with a lot of what you all are saying and can't wait for a follow up. Though I'm not optimistic in this case.

[Sir RaiderDuck OMS]

She comes home and gains 80lbs in a month. To me, that was like a slap in the face of the people helping her.

Gaining 80lbs in a month means she wasn't even trying. It means she was eating even more calories than she had before, and by a considerable margin.

[Brooklynista]

After I rebounded from how gross the site of the blood was, I was astounded that Lupe was still menstruating.  At that size I would think the body would shut down that function.  Sort of like Olympic gymnasts? So on top of everything else Gilbert has to change her Always pads??  Yeah, no.

 

People have limits and even if he thought he was okay being a caregiver in the beginning, I could see him being worn down by Lupe constant whining and neediness.  They never really said if Gilbert was doing anything more than talking to other women.  I couldn't blame him for wanting to have a conversation with someone who wasn't asking for a pee pad change.  Lupe didn't really seem to give a hell about him beyond what he was bringing her so she could stuff her maw.

 

I give him a break on reaching out for a bit of companionship.

[mmecorday]

 

All I got is: What's eating Gilbert?

 

I'll see myself out.

That's funny -- in a funny "ha ha" way and also because my girlfriend said that she felt like she was watching a remake of "What's Eating Gilbert Grape?" with an all-Latino cast. Didn't Lupe say that her father left her in the bathtub for eight hours? Just like poor Arnie ...

[Fuzzysox]

Gaining 80lbs in a month means she wasn't even trying. It means she was eating even more calories than she had before, and by a considerable margin.

From watching years of these 600 lb stories I'm pretty sure that they all like to self-sabotage themselves because 1) it's all they know how to do 2) can't deal with real life 3) without the weight then they "lose" their identities and attention they get from others.

 

I'm pretty convinced that Gilbert got paid to be her caregiver or he was waiting it out for a large insurance payout if she did die. I do give him credit for sticking it out but I don't see much of a future for them as a couple.