Mark & Nikki: Touch That Window, Lose Your Hand

[RCharter]

But here's the problem, even he admits to telling her there was a chance, even at 2%, and this gave her hope.

Not to mention that she is 19.  If you held me to everything I said at 19 I would be a far different person than I am today.  And I think he knows darn well that it is unfair to hold someone so young to a decision they will have to stick with for the rest of their life.  This is why he relishes holding the "well, if you don't do what I say I'll just send you back" card over her head.

 

"you re-arranged by books....maybe I'll just send you back"

"you may want kids....well I don't...maybe I'll just send you back"

"your period makes you moody once a month....maybe I'll just send you back"

"if you disagree with me over anything....maybe I'll just send you back"

 

There is a reason why men like Mark go to impoverished countries to find a woman, he has all the cards right now.  She doesn't want to go back to poverty and he knows that, which is why he always holds it over her head so she will fall in line.  I hope she can stick it out, get her green card and drive off in his Miata.

 

And since he doesn't want kids, why doesn't he just get a vasectomy?

[ExplainItAgain]

I agree that Mark should get a vasectomy if he's that adamant about not having anymore kids. Why risk it? Especially now after he's seen that Nikki might be ambivalent about it. The only good thing is that he told her ahead of time.

 

So, does Mark just rent pianos for an event or is he hired to play them as well?

[BradandJanet]

Mark's business profile mentions a degree in music. I think the business is primarily rental, but he probably has connections to musicians he can recommend as part of the deal. 

[cooksdelight]

Mark is afraid for anyone to go snipping around down there, I think. It might destroy his manhood. He'd no longer be the perfect specimen.

[guilfoyleatpp]

His reluctance to have children and talk about it meaning he has to "give up his dream" makes me wonder about his desire to have kids in the first place.

What if this was the source of his antagonism with his first wife?

 

They have some kids and he's like "Eff you, this was your idea. YOU take care of them."

 

She's stuck trying to take care of 4 kids with zero help so she leaves his ass.  Leaves the kids.  Take THAT selfish. It would explain a lot about how he feels so put upon by raising 4 kids in diapers. He continually mentions it.

[WhoAmIReally]

I don't know; he said he's been rasing kids for 27 years.  The guy deserves a break.  It's really too bad that he couldn't buy a robot. 

[AussieBabe]

Raising kids for x years and yet he decides to raise--err marry another. He should've bought a robot.

Sidenote...I finally saw a picture of his ex-wife on IG. Yeah, if she abandoned the kids, I can't see why they'd be taking pictures with her as recently as 6 weeks ago.

[WhoAmIReally]

They had shared custody but he had primary physical custody while they were growing up.  They lived with him and she paid child support.  From what I gather from the court records.

 

A robot would be ideal for him.  It's too bad he wasn't born 25 years later--I'm sure they'll have some pretty good models by then.  It would shut down the whole mail-order (internet-order?) bride business.

Edited November 18, 2015 by WhoAmIReally

[AussieBabe]

I figured it wasn't like he had claimed. He made it seem like she just left him high and dry with four kids in diapers. If she was unemployed and her primary job was taking care of the kids, it probably was in the best interests of their kids to live with the parent who who was gainfully employed and could provide stability. At any rate, he keeps bringing it up like he resents her for it. If I hear four kids in diapers one more time, I'm going to scream.

A robot or blow up doll would work better than someone who has a voice and feelings.

Edited November 18, 2015 by AussieBabe

[Aw my lahgs]

She didn't wake up one morning, packed up her clothes and decided to drive off into the sunset, never to be heard of again and leaving him with "4 kids in diapers".

She lives about 5 minutes away and has always remained involved. While usually women are awarded primary custody, The Specimen fought hard and long and since she obviously didn't have a lot to offer her children he was awarded primary custody.

Edited November 18, 2015 by Nutella

[locomoco]

Sidenote...I finally saw a picture of his ex-wife on IG.

IG?

[KarmaG]

IG?

Instagram https://instagram.com

[locomoco]

So, does anyone have the link to Mark's ex's instagram account that was mentioned above? I didn't see anything in the social media links thread

[AussieBabe]

So, does anyone have the link to Mark's ex's instagram account that was mentioned above? I didn't see anything in the social media links thread

It was on Elise's Instagram, and since her mother didn't want to be affiliated with the show, I opted not to post the link. If you do a search for #90dayfiance on Instagram, you'll come across her page--if she hasn't made it private since yesterday. :-)

[locomoco]

I see, thanks. (found it)

Edited November 18, 2015 by locomoco

[Raja]

Mark and Nikki driving to the beach was like watching a dad driving with a petulant teenage daughter. Why oh why would this young girl want to marry this older man? Surely a green card is not worth it.

 

I know the moderator asked us to tone down talk about the elephant in the room earlier but what do we know about her? That she was an 18 year old working in a KTV bar meaning she was on the potential road to being a prostitute. Living the remaining her extended life as a young widow or a divorced (US) or separated (Philippines) wife is a whole lot easier to come back from than being a prosti who aged out of the sex business.

[WhoAmIReally]

I know the moderator asked us to tone down talk about the elephant in the room earlier but what do we know about her? That she was an 18 year old working in a KTV bar meaning she was on the potential road to being a prostitute. Living the remaining her extended life as a young widow or a divorced (US) or separated (Philippines) wife is a whole lot easier to come back from than being a prosti who aged out of the sex business.

 

I have no opinion or knowledge about what goes on in those bars, but it must be remembered that she met Mark on a "dating" site when she was 16.  She put herself on the market early to get the hell out Dodge.  There's nothing for her in the Phillippines.  Uneducated (possibly finished high school), no job prospects, and, apparently, no family.  There's no way she's letting Mark out of her clutches until she gets what she wants.  She'll leave him and move on with her life once she's jumped through the immigration hoops.  Poor dumb Mark.  Poor dumb Nikki. 

 

Elise is a sweetheart.  She seems kind and confident, which probably speaks to good parenting.  So we have to give Mark and his ex-wife some kudooz for that.

[Steve]

I've done the 90 Day Fiance visa myself, but I haven't been on the show.  My experience is relevant to Mark because at 53 (6 years ago) I also didn't want more children.  I was communicating with a number of women online including one who was 20 and very attractive and had no children.  Finally I decided to meet my wife instead who was 29 (or her birth certificate said 33) and already had one child.  I think most of these women lie about their age.  I told her I probably didn't want more children and I believed she was OK with that since she already had a 10 year old son.  I didn't meet the 20 year old because I did the math that Mark wants to ignore.  It's not fair or reasonable to ask and expect that a 19 or 20 year old with no children will not want to have them later and here in the US she can eventually get those children even if it means finding another man.  Mark has only himself to blame for ignoring that reality if she later leaves him for another man.  So even though the 20 year old begged and seemed genuinely disappointed, I never met her which is what Mark should've done, but he was "thinking with the wrong head".  Nikki is cute, but so are a lot of women in their 30s and 40s and even some in their 50s (look up Maribel Guardia).  If you don't want more children that's the smart play.

[Arwen Evenstar]

Mark knows exactly what he wants---hence...what he wants and needs is easier to get from a mature woman. IMO....this relationship is a bad train wreck waiting to happen.

Sorry Mark...stop trying to make Nikki be anyone other than who she is...she's not yet got the maturity to see the world the way you do. At 35 she may, particuarly if she's had at least one marriage and a couple of kids already. She's barely tasted the sweet of spring and he's pushed her into winter without summer or fall. I don't Ike how he dismsses her and ignores her. Threatening to send her back.,she'd probably be glad to go back after living with such a narcissist....who is looking for a trophy wife...there's something very squicky about Mark. My hubs watched thus with me and felt sorry for her and how inappropriate his behavior towards her is.

Edited November 26, 2015 by Arwen Evenstar

[merylinkid]

I would love to get a look at those court records.   I find it difficult to believe that Mark got primary physical custody.    He does not strike me as someone who would run the kids around to doctor's appointments, soccer practice, etc.   He strikes me as asking for custody solely to get out of paying child support, then dumping all the real work on the ex.    She probably had to go to all the parent teacher conference and then tell him what happened -- and if she didn't right away he was in court trying to hold her in contempt.

 

I see guys like him all the time in my law practice.   The kids are prizes to be won, not actual human beings with their own thoughts and desires.

 

But I could be wrong, he could be dad of the year and this is all an act for the show.

[CofCinci]

I would love to get a look at those court records. I find it difficult to believe that Mark got primary physical custody. He does not strike me as someone who would run the kids around to doctor's appointments, soccer practice, etc. He strikes me as asking for custody solely to get out of paying child support, then dumping all the real work on the ex. She probably had to go to all the parent teacher conference and then tell him what happened -- and if she didn't right away he was in court trying to hold her in contempt.

I see guys like him all the time in my law practice. The kids are prizes to be won, not actual human beings with their own thoughts and desires.

But I could be wrong, he could be dad of the year and this is all an act for the show.

While you can't see the records without court access, you can see the title of each action. It seems the mother was a hot mess. Perhaps Mark originally didn't seek out primary custody but he ended up with it --- after years of court.

[merylinkid]

Can you PM the case number.   Because just becuase stuff is titled that way does not mean it was true.    I have had cases drag on because one parent refused to accept the other parent had any other rights, and filed all kinds of motions alleging terrible things.   I find it most often in abusive situations.   The abuser sees the court system as just another way to control/abuse the victim.   

[CofCinci]

Can you PM the case number.   Because just becuase stuff is titled that way does not mean it was true.    I have had cases drag on because one parent refused to accept the other parent had any other rights, and filed all kinds of motions alleging terrible things.   I find it most often in abusive situations.   The abuser sees the court system as just another way to control/abuse the victim.   

I last looked like 1+ month ago.  Too lazy to go dig it up.  Google his last name and then look in the Maryland online court website.

[still hoping]

I don't see anything nice or sweet about Nikki. I honestly do not think she is pretty...she is very young and thin, and has long hair but it looks dirty. She does not seem to dress up or wear makeup or jewelry, she lays around. Has no interests. I wish we had seen more of her life "back home"....family, friends...the "Karaoke bar" where she did whatever work she did?

 

I really see  "hunter gets captured by the game" here.....creepy Mark wanted a young, hot do-over of his first marriage with a willing energetic cute young girl to love the specimen and look up to him - he got.... sullen.Nikki

 

Nikki wanted to come to America, I don't think she wants a green card so much cause she has no intention of working....she wanted a meal ticket. She saw a guy who owned a house on the water and owned his own business....boom...lazy Nikki latched on.

Then she got Mark, zebra sheets and his crazy ways. I do think he has something more going on - Aspringers, on the "spectrum" ?

He supposedly not only rents the pianos but tunes them....some high functioning people have a very specific talent or interest that they do well with

I don't see Mark as a musician although he may be able to play piano...but I do see him as a very finicky, precise focused  "tuner"

[WhoAmIReally]

While you can't see the records without court access, you can see the title of each action. It seems the mother was a hot mess. Perhaps Mark originally didn't seek out primary custody but he ended up with it --- after years of court.

 

I still think you're looking at the wrong Mark Shoemaker. (He is not in Frederick County and his middle initial is not E.)  Our Mark filed for divorce in October 1996 and was granted primary custody three months later (January 1997).  The mother has nothing bad on file except a speeding ticket and a recent financial problem.  Oh, and the assault claim, but that was dismissed.

Edited November 29, 2015 by WhoAmIReally

[merylinkid]

I checked the Baltimore County records.   Yeah some HUGE questions here.   Emergency motions by Mom that were not denied out of hand.   Dad being denied a monetary award in the divorce as "inequitable."   Arguments over freaking daycare for the kids.   This was NOT pretty.

 

Also, joint physical with primary to dad, really does put to rest the lie that she put left him with 4 kids in diapers.   First, the daycare argument was only about the younger children.   That implies one kid did NOT need daycare, which is well past the diapers.   Second, in Maryland, shared custody for child support purposes begins at 128 overnights (even back then we didn't update our CS guidelines from 1989 to 2010, I kid you not).   That means that AT LEAST 1/3 of the year is spent with the mother.   You did not get to 128 overnights with every other weekend, 2 weeks in summer and alternating holidays.   Those kids spent significant time with their mom, just more with dad.  

Edited November 29, 2015 by merylinkid

[nenya]

Why is Nikki still wearing that black Zip Tie ring? Doesn't Mark have his ex-wife's old ring to give to her?

 

But seriously, couldn't he spring for even a gold band or something to give to her instead. She is nicer than me, that zip tie would have been either tossed or put into some sort of "memory" box long ago. It doesn't even seem that comfortable to wear. Maybe the poor girl can't get the thing off. 

[RCharter]

Why is Nikki still wearing that black Zip Tie ring? Doesn't Mark have his ex-wife's old ring to give to her?

 

But seriously, couldn't he spring for even a gold band or something to give to her instead. She is nicer than me, that zip tie would have been either tossed or put into some sort of "memory" box long ago. It doesn't even seem that comfortable to wear. Maybe the poor girl can't get the thing off. 

well, its another way to hold things over her head.  He hasn't even given her ring, so she has even less security about being "sent back" if she upsets Mark in any way.  Could be he hasn't thought of it.....could be a power play.....

[still hoping]

I don't like Mark...but I don't like Nikki either. I am so done with the poor widdle Nikki.

 

She deserves better than a zip tie...a cracker jack plastic ring or something from a dollar store would suit her nicely IMHO

 

This is such a sham - 2 needy people who found each other - well maybe well matched in their own way?

 

I seriously wonder if our so called "ins" people who grant these green cards do not tune into this show

 

Mo and Nikki could be sent packin by our government IMHO????

[cooksdelight]

A side note: INS and ICE do watch these shows. The feds swooped down on Kandi and Todd Burruss' home in Atlanta after they showed footage on RHoATL of the two of them storing items belonging to Apollo Nida. He owes a ton of money in restitution. Why on earth they stupidly thought they wouldn't get in trouble is beyond me.

So yes, people are watching and taking notes, I'm sure.

[deltaburkefan]

If Mo and Dani didn't have an issue, Nikki and Mark won't either. They have more of a relationship, as creepy as it is.

[RCharter]

If Mo and Dani didn't have an issue, Nikki and Mark won't either. They have more of a relationship, as creepy as it is.

you're making me miss those two crazy kids.....come on TLC, bring back those two lovebirds.

 

But I think your point is well taken.  I think INS/ICE may be reluctant to try to define relationship since it means so many different things to so many people

[deltaburkefan]

Yeah, the people who make these decisions can't say "Your relationship weirds me out," or "I think you're making a mistake," unless someone is found to have a criminal past that involves domestic violence or something like that. If Dani wants to pretend that Mohamed loves her and he fulfills what is required by the country, or if Nikki wants to marry someone forty years her senior... it's not immigration's place to tell them to reconsider. 

[Aw my lahgs]

A side note: INS and ICE do watch these shows. The feds swooped down on Kandi and Todd Burruss' home in Atlanta after they showed footage on RHoATL of the two of them storing items belonging to Apollo Nida. He owes a ton of money in restitution. Why on earth they stupidly thought they wouldn't get in trouble is beyond me.

So yes, people are watching and taking notes, I'm sure.

I'm sure they do, but after S2 Mohamed received his green card, I've lost faith.

[Paulagail]

I think nikki should tun back home as fast as she can its clear mark cant separate her from his 1st wife. He totally ignores her. Shes young and deserves someone who will love and care for her and her happiness. Mark is a sellfish pig and only cares about himself

[ThinkerBell]

Mark reminded Nikki that he brought up signing a prenup on their first date. Who talks about a prenup on their first date? Has Mr. Big Spender ("it's my house, my boats, my car, my retirement fund") even replaced that stupid zip-tie with a real ring?

Edited November 30, 2015 by ThinkerBell

[Raja]

Mark reminded Nikki that he brought up signing a prenup on their first date. Who talks about a prenup on their first date? Has Mr. Big Spender ("it's my house, my boats, my car, my retirement fund") even replaced that stupid zip-tie with a real ring?

That is the thing about so called mail order. You don't fly halfway around the world for a date but rather to prove you are real and make a go ahead or stop decision. Also to check the box for one nation's immigration service to let the alien spouse live in their nation. It is more like an arranged marriage only father's are not doing the negotiating

[AussieBabe]

Point blank and simple...I freaking dislike Mark or whoever wrote the script. Instead of complimenting her when she was in the dress, he broke her heart. Wtf was her life like in Cebu if marrying this insensitive prick is the only option? He infuriates me and inspires me to rage. Take your house, your car, your retirement plan, and everything else. Shove it up your bum, Mark.

Edited November 30, 2015 by AussieBabe

[still hoping]

Realistically nothing is stopping Nikki from leaving. 

I posted an interesting link - her facebook page from dec 2014 on the media thread

 

People who get divorced with no kids who are only married a short time don't get alimony...protecting his assets is only reasonable

Nikki has no plans to do anything, I think she is just too lazy to go back and try to find a better american hubby who will be more genenrous

I also saw screenshots of her on a model/talent page = claiming to be in LA. Her facebook page says Cebu.

She looks much prettier in both - make up and hair done - but her facebook page shows her belly and bellybutton...what is up with that? LOL

 

There is no love there on either side -neither one is in this for "the right reasons". I think they both deserve whatever they get. 

[rulesoftravel]

I think that the model/talent agency is just an online agency that you send pictures into.   Nikki has no resume or jobs listed after her name and the photos were taken in Cebu.     Mark probably signed her up.  

https://www.facebook.com/search/top/?q=nikki%20rose%20gervise

And that little affidavit of support Mark signed pretty much negates the pre-nup.        He's obligated to support her for about 10 years-and divorce doesn't change that.  http://www.uscis.gov/green-card/green-card-processes-and-procedures/affidavit-support

Edited November 30, 2015 by rulesoftravel

[3girlsforus]

Do we know what Mark's real settlement was with his ex as far as money goes? He is certainly acting like she got every penny he had leaving him to eat beans from a can. But I can see him thinking that even after being married and having 4 children she didn't deserve anything so any kind of settlement would leave him feeling like he got screwed. 

[merylinkid]

Actually the Financial Affidavits are rarely enforced by the Feds and the divorce court doesn't care.

 

Regarding the property settlement with the ex, I am just spitballing here, but I am guessing the assets were the house, the cars and his business.   Maryland is a marital property state, not a community property state.   Not much functional difference really.   It just means, anything acquired during the marriage is marital property regardless of how titled.   SO even though the house might be in his name only if it was bought during the marriage, she is entitled to her share.   It does not matter who paid the mortgage.   I get this one a lot "But the mortgage was paid with MY money."   No it's both the spouses money and it is marital funds.   Same with the business, if he worked on developing it during the marriage, the increase of value from date of the marriage to the date of divorce is marital property.   

 

This is where I get stuck.   He wanted a monentary award, which is money, not stuff.   If he got the house, and wanted to keep the business, he was paying HER, not her paying him to buy him out.   SO what the request for monetary award was based on, I have no clue.   Even the value of her little sports car would be offset against the value of HIS buyout of her share of stuff.   

 

Sorry, just a quickie primer on family law in Merryland.

[3girlsforus]

Actually the Financial Affidavits are rarely enforced by the Feds and the divorce court doesn't care.

 

Regarding the property settlement with the ex, I am just spitballing here, but I am guessing the assets were the house, the cars and his business.   Maryland is a marital property state, not a community property state.   Not much functional difference really.   It just means, anything acquired during the marriage is marital property regardless of how titled.   SO even though the house might be in his name only if it was bought during the marriage, she is entitled to her share.   It does not matter who paid the mortgage.   I get this one a lot "But the mortgage was paid with MY money."   No it's both the spouses money and it is marital funds.   Same with the business, if he worked on developing it during the marriage, the increase of value from date of the marriage to the date of divorce is marital property.   

 

This is where I get stuck.   He wanted a monentary award, which is money, not stuff.   If he got the house, and wanted to keep the business, he was paying HER, not her paying him to buy him out.   SO what the request for monetary award was based on, I have no clue.   Even the value of her little sports car would be offset against the value of HIS buyout of her share of stuff.   

 

Sorry, just a quickie primer on family law in Merryland.

So it sounds like it was a typical distribution of the assets for a marriage. And after 4 kids, it was a marriage, not an attempt for a green card. So Mark's impression that she took everything is pretty warped. It's just his belief that these women have no value and therefore deserve nothing. 

 

I don't blame Mark for wanting a pre-nup. Fine. But a prenup that says whenever Mark gets tired of her he can change the locks and leave her homeless and penniless is unacceptable for someone claiming to want to marry you. This is assuming, of course, that the prenup actually says what the show claims it says.

Edited November 30, 2015 by 3girlsforus

[gunderda]

I think most pre-nups start out as one sided and it's the responsibility of the other party to negotiate what they want.  OBVIOUSLY the person wanting the pre-nup is going to include stuff for the other party as they want it as one sided as possible.

 

If Nikki didn't do that or didn't have counsel to advise she do that, well then too bad so sad.  I don't believe for a minute that she's that nieve. 

 

And you can't agree to it and then say "oh well I did that because I didn't know what it was" especially when you are told "I explained it to you"

 

She wasn't forced into this marriage (if it happens). Mark is no prize but Nikki is shooting out red flags everywhere.

 

I did feel bad for her during the dress shopping though.  The owner seemed like a setup.  She was way too vocal about her opinion. But I think Nikki's hurt was real.

[Toaster Strudel]

Maybe Mark actually bought her from her karaoke bar.

[CofCinci]

Maybe Mark actually bought her from her karaoke bar.

That actually happens. I was in the Navy and my division Chief paid the "bar tab" for his wife who he met at a bar in the Phillipines. He explained the process to me. Basically the women have to earn X amount of money for the bar, if you want to take her back to your room or marry her, you have to pay the bar back her missed earnings. It's human trafficking but many sailors don't realize that.

[Raja]

That actually happens. I was in the Navy and my division Chief paid the "bar tab" for his wife who he met at a bar in the Phillipines. He explained the process to me. Basically the women have to earn X amount of money for the bar, if you want to take her back to your room or marry her, you have to pay the bar back her missed earnings. It's human trafficking but many sailors don't realize that.

Well if he was still in the Philippines he would pay the bar fine to keep the pimp at bay but in Maryland he is out of reach. So while he might have bought her vacation time off to be with him there isn't a lifetime or long term marraige purchase as with a US serviceman stationed in the Philippines  living on the economy like Mayo, Richard Gere's  character's father was with two women in the movie An Officer and a Gentleman.

[Adeejay]

I'm sure they do, but after S2 Mohamed received his green card, I've lost faith.

 

Mohamed passed his INS interview with flying colors.  It really doesn't matter whether he is in love with Danielle or not, the fact is that he knows everything there is to know about her, and could actually prove that they were living together as "Man and Wife".  A couple like Mark and Nikki should set off all kinds of bells and alarms, but as long as they meet the criteria, there is nothing the INS can do.

[3girlsforus]

I think most pre-nups start out as one sided and it's the responsibility of the other party to negotiate what they want.  OBVIOUSLY the person wanting the pre-nup is going to include stuff for the other party as they want it as one sided as possible.

 

 

Maybe I'm naive but I always figured most prenups are one-sided but not punitive (barring a section in the case of adultery). There is a difference between an agreement that keeps pre-marital assets separate and settles on a small figure for support in case of divorce and one that says nothing ever belongs to you and I get everything. Mark's version of a pre-nup is about humiliation and control. He doesn't want to protect his current assets. He wants her to have nothing he doesn't dribble out to her. I actually suspect his end game is to do to her what he couldn't do to his ex - grind her into the ground and either leave her on the side of the road or begging him for scraps - whichever turns him on more at the time. 

[still hoping]

 I don't post speculation....if I did I could say what I think Nikki was "probably" up to at the "Karaoke Bar" in Cebu....google it LOL

 

She had modeling pics up thru a small local photog in Cebu (on facebook) and on the talent site

Check the other links I put on the social media.....she had another guy american ? maybe 40 years old as her Pinterest pic

she has no boards but she follows and has followers who are Filipina gals married to Americans

 

My personal opinion is - she should go back and Mark should get honest with himself and wish her well. I do think he has to pay her way back

No "probably" about it they are a disaster waiting to happen...but it takes 2 to tango - and these two are equally involved

IMHO Nikki was set on finding some older "rich" (or well off) American to marry...she has NO intention of working or doing anything

sure she would like a kid

She found a guy who seemed good on paper - own business, owns a home on the water etc...she got a rude awakening when she got "home" to

fussy odd old Mark, zebra sheets and all. Tough luck Nikki..get out while the gettin is still good JMO