Say What?: Commercials That Made Us Scratch Our Heads

[riley702]

Ah, OK. I know Kaley has done ads for Proactiv with two microscopic zits (maybe makeup) on her forehead as proof of the "pain of acne" she suffered.

[captain1]

Sorry - late to the party, but I think the thing in the King's Hawaiian rolls commercial with the neighbor parking out front is so that he will be in range to suck one of the rolls out through the window and into his mouth!!

[Aquarius]

Yeah, the King's Hawaiian rolls commercial is a serious headscratcher for me.  WHY do they all just suck them into their mouths?  Even the dog?  Is this some new indication of the deliciousness of a food, developing an otherworldly suction for it?  And what the heck does it mean to go pulule?  (I tried googling it, no help; maybe I have it spelled wrong).  And why does the neighbor only thank Carol?  She didn't bake the rolls.  Seriously, that commercial is all sorts of weird. 

Edited May 8, 2014 by Aquarius

[Wax Lion]

Ah. I didn't know what her name was until I searched for the link to the spot.  Wonder if the demographics for Portlandia have FICO scores of over 700, 'cause you know, you'll need a high one to get approved.

Suppose I should go subject myself to watch an episode or two.  Can't be worse than Mixology.

Reminds me of the Time Warner Cable commercial where they have some guy who I guess is a football coach - I don't know if he really is one.  How many people know who this dude is?  (OK, before I hit Reply, I went and googled it. Bill Cowher. Retired Pittsburgh Football Coach.  Still I have no clue.  But, what the hell.  It's a commercial shown in NY.  And not just during sports.  I'm getting cranky.  I'm going to go eat a Snickers.)

 

Replying late because I only just discovered this thread but I'd say it's more specifically Portlandia that's high end. It's a show that jokes about localvore diets, "artisan" foods, trendy restaurants. Those usually are the concerns of people who can afford to buy organic groceries and make a special trip to a local butcher for all their meat.

 

Meanwhile, my localized pet peeve is "Hawaiian" bread. I don't blame people who call it that because that's how King's Bakery branded it but in Hawaii King's knows to call it Portuguese Sweet Bread.

[AntiBeeSpray]

Just heard a good one: Inmates.com instead of Ebates.com. That's what I get for not paying full attention to a commercial XD. 

[Lola16]

 

I'd say it's more specifically Portlandia that's high end. It's a show that jokes about localvore diets, "artisan" foods, trendy restaurants. Those usually are the concerns of people who can afford to buy organic groceries and make a special trip to a local butcher for all their meat.

Right... but are the viewers "high end"? Because, if they aren't, then the commercial misses the demographic that would be approved for it.

[LisaMarie]

I really can't stand the Dempsters commercials - especially Dempsters Vegetable Bread with the model eating a sandwich and second model walks up "Excuse me, but are you eating a Samwich?" and then repeats it "A Samwich?" - yes bitch, I’m eating a sandwich, now get the f* out of my face and learn english – it’s sandwich you dumb twit!

it has to be the most ridiculous commercial - models do get lunch breaks, and like everyone else, they do eat sandwiches. And why ask what the food choice was a second time? Did the Samwich look too much like a turkey leg?

[ramble]

Gigantic for Apple's iPhone 5s. Every time it plays, which is all. the. freaking. time., I hear, "gigantic a big, big load". That's bad but then I read the real song info & didn't feel so bad because I don't think Apple quite got the song either. Edited May 14, 2014 by ramble

[Prevailing Wind]

I finally saw the Busey "Amazon Fart TV"  What is it that makes that guy so creepy?  All his features are in the right places on his face, but he SO creeps me out.  Is it those big horse teeth?

[AntiBeeSpray]

Gigantic for Apple's iPhone 5s. Every time it plays, which is all. the. freaking. time., I hear, "gigantic a big, big load". That's bad but then I read the real song info & didn't feel so bad because I don't think Apple quite got the song either.

*ugh* I HATE that commercial. The song itself makes no sense either.

 

Just read some more about it O_O... bet that Apple didn't read more about it before using the song.

Edited May 14, 2014 by AntiBeeSpray

[Aquarius]

So now Domino's just outright admit they suck.  But it's okay.  Because sucking IS an option.  Gotcha.

[Ghost of TWOP Past]

That is not a new strategy for Dominos. Remember a year or two back when their big push was, "We're determined to be somewhat less shitty!"? 

[smittykins]

So apparently they haven't succeeded yet?

[cynicat]

Just read some more about it O_O... bet that Apple didn't read more about it before using the song.

 

To the contrary, I bet they did.  Look at all the press...

[lachesis]

Captain Morgan's White Rum has a reggae-type jingle (no idea if it's a real song) that goes "Uh oh... we're in trouble, something something something..." and my brain automatically fills in the rest with "pop-o-matic bubble". I blame being a child of the 80s. It drives me crazy because it gets stuck in my head for DAYS at a time!

[RedZoneTuba]

Yes, that Capt Morgan jingle is the worst ear-worm currently on TV.

[lachesis]

I haven't seen that one, but I hate it when companies make up words that don't even make sense when the original word is just as good in context. Sammich is funny, Samwich is just dumb.

[cynicat]

Captain Morgan's White Rum has a reggae-type jingle (no idea if it's a real song) that goes "Uh oh... we're in trouble, something something something..." and my brain automatically fills in the rest with "pop-o-matic bubble". I blame being a child of the 80s. It drives me crazy because it gets stuck in my head for DAYS at a time!

 

Because I am also a child of the 70's/80's, I felt obliged to track down the original.  That was a great jingle and a great game!

 

[Taylorh2]

You say that "Sammich is funny" but that "Samwich is just plain dumb"    Really??? WTH is the difference ?

[Aquarius]

You say that "Sammich is funny" but that "Samwich is just plain dumb"    Really??? WTH is the difference ?

 

The "w" just makes it sound like you don't know how to pronounce it.

[Jamoche]

As head-scratching as an ad for a cleaner(*) that shows people taking a fully-cooked chicken off the floor and later serving it to their guests might be, having that ad show up during Kitchen Nightmares in the middle of Gordon Ramsay's obligatory "this kitchen is disgusting!" rant just takes it to the next level.

 

(*) It's got some amazingly generic-sounding name which they apparently are trying to make stick in your heads by having really weird ads. It's not working.

[lachesis]

Aquarius, you got it right! It's all in the pronunciation.

[Callasin]

I was only half listening to this cute commercial where a dog jumps up to catch bones with a George Clinton song in the background. I could have sworn the announcer said the bones were full of twists and turds.  It made perfect sense to me after owning a dog who would pick in the cat pan.

[ari333]

Gigantic for Apple's iPhone 5s. Every time it plays, which is all. the. freaking. time., I hear, "gigantic a big, big load". That's bad but then I read the real song info & didn't feel so bad because I don't think Apple quite got the song either.

 

HEE. I hear, "a big, big loaf "

 

I'm going to hell

[suomi]

Wow, I had chickens for awhile and never thought to give them blowouts, but I do vacuum my cats. Hey, it's either that or vacuum my house and the cats are smaller.

[90PercentGravity]

People running around with milk shooting out of their asses does NOT make me want to drink milk.

[Lola16]

So now Domino's just outright admit they suck.  But it's okay.  Because sucking IS an option.  Gotcha.

That's an "intended" message.  Yea, our pizza tastes like the box but it's only $5 and when you're drunk enough, you'll eat the box too.

[90PercentGravity]

The evolution of those ads is so strange:

 

"We're sorry our pizza tasted like shit, but we fixed it."

"Okay, we lied, we totally still taste like shit, but hey, we're cheap."

"By the way, our employees are idiots, but we have a website, so...."

[riley702]

I'm old, because I can remember when pizza mixes were touted as better and fresher than delivery. We kids laughed ourselves sick at the innuendo when the disappointed couple opened their delivery pizza box: "It's stuck, Helen!" (as Helen responds sourly) "It's cold again, too." Yep, kids, that passed for innuendo back in the day. You damned kids, get off my yard!

[ABay]

There's a Depends commercial running right now where a woman is musing about how wearing Depends makes it possible for her to leave the house and go out and do active things, like kickboxing. Then there's a scene of her working with her kickboxing trainer, and as she lifts her leg in a perfect roundhouse kick, all I can think is, "She's peeing right now."

Cannot stop laughing at this. May need Depends.

[bilgistic]

Wow, I had chickens for awhile and never thought to give them blowouts, but I do vacuum my cats. Hey, it's either that or vacuum my house and the cats are smaller.

I'm cracking up! My two cats flee when I run the vacuum. I nicknamed it "Scary", and they get treats after I run Scary, so they aren't completely terrified of it. I can't imagine vacuuming them with it!!

[Muffyn]

Then there's a scene of her working with her kickboxing trainer, and as she lifts her leg in a perfect roundhouse kick, all I can think is, "She's peeing right now."

 

Why use Depend?  Because she peeing right now and not spraying her trainer in the face.  It's a win-win situation, unless he's into golden showers. 

[muffkins]

My cats run from the vacuum as well, but they love to be sticky-rolled.  (Sorry, don't know what they are really called)  The Dempster's vegetable bread ad bothers me as well, as it acts like it's weird that she is eating.

[riley702]

My cats and I have an understanding about the vacuum. I start at the front of the house and they flee to the back bedroom. When I get to the back bedroom, I shut it off for a second while they make a break for the front of the house.

[Prevailing Wind]

She can't hold it until she can get to a bathroom?  The less you use *those* muscles, the weaker they become and soon you'll NEED to wear diapers because you've lost the ability to control your bladder.

[bilgistic]

My cats run from the vacuum as well, but they love to be sticky-rolled.  (Sorry, don't know what they are really called)  The Dempster's vegetable bread ad bothers me as well, as it acts like it's weird that she is eating.

Very scientifically, I call it the "tapey-rolly-thingy".

[Prevailing Wind]

We call ours "the Brush" - works just fine.  LOL.  Both my cats have too fine hair to use the FURminator.  My late cat had really thick fur and that thing just cleaned out so much hair!

[Lola16]

There's a commercial for PBA and I thought it was an old TBS or Comedy Central commercial:

 

[suomi]

I'm cracking up! My two cats flee when I run the vacuum. I nicknamed it "Scary", and they get treats after I run Scary, so they aren't completely terrified of it. I can't imagine vacuuming them with it!!

 

My male cat had serious attitude and refused to move when I vacuumed the furniture. One time instead of moving him I vacuumed his tail and rump and he liked it. The next few times I took it further and further and it continued to be OK so I started vacuuming him regularly. Then the girls noticed he was allowing it so they decided to submit as well. (He also walked on a leash. Very cool cat.) Since then I've seen beaucoup kitty-vac vids on youtube. Who knew?

 

One commercial that makes me scratch my head is for the Listen Up, that over-the-counter hearing aid. Dude buys one and they show him sitting in what looks like a sold-out football stadium, and I'm fairly certain they infer that he now can hear the QB calling plays in the huddle on the field. But not the 20,000 screaming fans surrounding him. Huh?

Edited June 3, 2014 by suomi

[ZaldamoWilder]

I'm not sure to laugh or cry at this one every time I see it.   Not the message, I'm not usually that much of an asshole, but the wording because, well, sometimes I am.    "I always thought that cigarette smoking just messed up your lungs."   Because, Roosevelt, all of the information you've been able to cull from reading and seeing 45 years worth of other anti-smoking campaigns and the way your lungs feel after you climb a flight of stairs and um, the block lettering on. the. fucking. box, has not indicated that "messed up" lungs can also kind of harsh your mortality mellow?    This commercial is the shit.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OdmI35elnCQ

[Wax Lion]

Right... but are the viewers "high end"? Because, if they aren't, then the commercial misses the demographic that would be approved for it.

 

I would expect so. The show jokes about high end products with a "isn't it funny how far we'll go to guarantee quality?" tone.

[Wax Lion]

You might need to be gay to hear it but there's a new kind of Bayer aspirin called Bayer Back & Body... except it sounds like "bareback" like having unprotected sex.

[janie jones]

"I always thought that cigarette smoking just messed up your lungs."   Because, Roosevelt, all of the information you've been able to cull from reading and seeing 45 years worth of other anti-smoking campaigns and the way your lungs feel after you climb a flight of stairs and um, the block lettering on. the. fucking. box, has not indicated that "messed up" lungs can also kind of harsh your mortality mellow?    This commercial is the shit.

I don't understand this guy.  "Oh, it'll just damage my lungs.  I don't really need those."  Dumb-dumb.

[ZaldamoWilder]

There's a commercial for PBA and I thought it was an old TBS or Comedy Central commercial:

 

 

LMAO!! Just the screenshot of this makes me crack up.   When I realized it was a real commercial for a real condition, I giggled even harder.  Hell if laughing inappropriately is a *disease* all of a sudden, you are all gonna start taking this shit with me.   Now, chug. 

[riley702]

I'm not sure to laugh or cry at this one every time I see it.   Not the message, I'm not usually that much of an asshole, but the wording because, well, sometimes I am.    "I always thought that cigarette smoking just messed up your lungs."   Because, Roosevelt, all of the information you've been able to cull from reading and seeing 45 years worth of other anti-smoking campaigns and the way your lungs feel after you climb a flight of stairs and um, the block lettering on. the. fucking. box, has not indicated that "messed up" lungs can also kind of harsh your mortality mellow?    This commercial is the shit.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OdmI35elnCQ

 

OK, it's a little better than I had feared. At least he's worried about heart attacks, etc. I was afraid that it was aimed at people who would shrug off the fact that cigarettes can kill you, but draw the line at yellow teeth, bad breath and wrinkles. You know, the really bad side effects.

[xls]

I couldn't figure out the "my little light, I'm gonna let it shine" commercial where the girl is hiding in the girls room stall then cuts her hair at the end. I guess someone put gum in her hair and she was cutting it out, but for the longest time, I didn't get it. 

[InDueTime]

I couldn't figure out the "my little light, I'm gonna let it shine" commercial where the girl is hiding in the girls room stall then cuts her hair at the end. I guess someone put gum in her hair and she was cutting it out, but for the longest time, I didn't get it.

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuXbLJap48c

It's a Cigna ad.  I'd say that you're right.  She must be the unpopular girl at her school who everyone picks on, hence the tone of the ad.  Also, the little girl on the bus that pushes the other girl, who is just looking for a seat, deserves to be slapped.

[Tabbyclaw]

...How are cutting gum out of your hair, resigning yourself to the arguing of your kids, and taking the last seat on the bus "being true to yourself"?

[riley702]

Also, how does that make you healthier? Stress is a killer.

[Aquarius]

Yeah, I completely do not get that Cigna ad.  Are we all just supposed to accept that we are losers in the eyes of the world and let Cigna treat us the same?  That's what I take away from it.