Say What?: Commercials That Made Us Scratch Our Heads

[Brattinella]

There's this Dr. Scholls commercial with people scraping the dead skin off their feet at the beach.  Why would you do that at the beach?

\

Why would you do that ANYWHERE except alone in your bathroom??  EEEESH!

[bilgistic]

I saw a commercial today for some kind of omega-3 supplement that promised "no fish burps". At least, that's what I think it said. It was fast, and after it was over, I said to the cats, "Did that just say, "fish burps"? I'm pretty sure my cats are pro-fish burps.

[ramble]

Why is the Apple Watch commercial so darn depressing?

Adding to the depression for me is the fact that a third grader, yes a third grader, showed up at school with their very own watch the week the watches came out. What is wrong with parents? I'm convinced this kid's parents probably let their kids jump on dishwasher doors & act like junior assholes in convenience stores. Edited May 26, 2015 by ramble

[bilgistic]

Adding to the depression for me is the fact that a third grader, yes a third grader, showed up at school with their very own watch the week the watches came out. What is wrong with parents? I'm convinced this kid's parents probably let their kids jump on dishwasher doors & act like junior assholes in convenience stores.

You know what? That is just not okay. I don't care who you are; there is no kind of reasoning for a nine-year-old having an Apple watch. None. It doesn't matter if it's Ricky fucking Schroeder on Silver Spoons and has a miniature train that he drives through his house. No child needs an Apple watch. Period. Hell, no adults need it. It's an overpriced luxury status symbol. Edited May 26, 2015 by bilgistic

[Bastet]

I saw a commercial today for some kind of omega-3 supplement that promised "no fish burps". At least, that's what I think it said.

 

Maybe it did, touting itself as an alternative to traditional fish oil supplements?

[Wings]

What is up with the Northern Quilted toilet paper ad?  It features a ceramic bunny on a table beside the toilet. The VO is the rabbit asking to be broken. Go ahead, one brush of your elbow.   The rabbit wants to be broken.  Odd and it does not relate to toilet paper at all!   ?????

Edited May 26, 2015 by wings707

[Brattinella]

What is up with the Northern Quilted toilet paper ad?  It features a ceramic bunny on a table beside the toilet. The VO is the rabbit asking to be broken. Go ahead, one brush of your elbow.   The rabbit wants to be broken.  Odd and it does not relate to toilet paper at all!   ?????

Ceramic bunny doesn't want to watch people pooping anymore.  I don't blame her.

[Ubiquitous]

"Work" a miracle? I had to listen twice. I hate Fall Out Boy.

I'm mainly indifferent to them, but I do remember seeing them on some show (The Hills?)and talking about weaing women's jeans.

[ari333]

Ceramic bunny has moderate to severe depression with suicidal tendencies.

[6 MeowMeowBeenz]

Ceramic bunny has moderate to severe depression with suicidal tendencies.

 

I hoped she asked her doctor about Xanax. Side effects include (voiceover of side effects, visual of bunnies romping in lettuce patches)

[90PercentGravity]

No way. People never romp in depression/anxiety drug commercials. They stare emotionless while other people play around them.

Edited May 26, 2015 by 90PercentGravity

[bilgistic]

I'm mainly indifferent to them, but I do remember seeing them on some show (The Hills?)and talking about weaing women's jeans.

Yes, Pete Wentz wore Ashlee Simpson's jeans when they were married. Also, pictures of his penis were "leaked" on the internet, so I always think of his not-very-impressive weiner whenever I see anything about him and his big, giant noggin, stupid hairdo, skinny jeans and his band. They all have huge heads and dumb haircuts.

Why do I know this??

[DeLurker]

Adding to the depression for me is the fact that a third grader, yes a third grader, showed up at school with their very own watch the week the watches came out. What is wrong with parents? I'm convinced this kid's parents probably let their kids jump on dishwasher doors & act like junior assholes in convenience stores.

They want their kid to be robbed?

 

At the end of April, the news was showing a surveillance video of a guy who grabbed an iPad out of the hands of a 2 year old. 

 

A quote from the Mom: She's grateful her children weren't seriously hurt, but said the toddler misses his iPad.

"The only thing is, 'Where is my iPad?' Every day. 'My iPad, my iPad, mommy. My iPad'" the mother said.

 

I get the appeal of a lot of the Apple products, but the watch just does nothing for me.  It is the same as wearing a sign that says "I'm a giant tool with too much money on my h̶a̶n̶d̶  wrist".

[smittykins]

No way. People never romp in depression/anxiety drug commercials. They stare emotionless while other people play around them.

And when they are treated with the advertised drug, they black cloud that represents their anxiety/depression gets smaller, but doesn't go away completely.

(Yes, I realize it's because anxiety and depression are usually lifelong conditions.)

[Prevailing Wind]

 

Why do I know this??

In case you're ever called to be a contestant on "Jeopardy!"  Shit like this will probably be in a category you won't be able to avoid.

[Muffyn]

Had a strange commercial/show juxtaposition moment today.  Elizabeth Banks played a porn star who abandons her sick child and sets up her husband to take the rap for murder on Law & Order: SVU.  During the show, her realtor.com commercial played.  Is she buying a house with her porn earnings?  She must have not been convicted of murder and was able to do the 300 guys in ten hours for $50,000 that was mentioned on SVU.  

[ramble]

You know what? That is just not okay. I don't care who you are; there is no kind of reasoning for a nine-year-old having an Apple watch. None.

I completely agree. I'm not sure it's reasonable for a 39-year-old to have one, but at least they're, in theory, a grown-up.

They want their kid to be robbed?

Or, as in this case, require an email to be sent to the entire student body, including parent lists, reminding students of disallowed electronics at school. Now every kid in school knows some kid has an Apple watch.

[AntiBeeSpray]

Had a strange commercial/show juxtaposition moment today.  Elizabeth Banks played a porn star who abandons her sick child and sets up her husband to take the rap for murder on Law & Order: SVU.  During the show, her realtor.com commercial played.  Is she buying a house with her porn earnings?  She must have not been convicted of murder and was able to do the 300 guys in ten hours for $50,000 that was mentioned on SVU.  

 

Woah that's way strange lol.

[bilgistic]

Or, as in this case, require an email to be sent to the entire student body, including parent lists, reminding students of disallowed electronics at school. Now every kid in school knows some kid has an Apple watch.

And will then tell their parents that so-and-so has one, so they need one, too.

I only ever had the ovaries to ask my mother for a $30 Swatch.

Edited May 27, 2015 by bilgistic

[janie jones]

I just saw an ITT Tech commercial where this woman says she has "nowhere to go but up."  Doesn't that mean she's on the bottom?  Why is she bragging?

[Muffyn]

When you've hit rock bottom, go to ITT!  Maybe they're trolling gutters for new students right now.

[Brattinella]

All I can think of when I see people on their smartphones, walking down the street is:

 

You are holding something in your hand that cost around $500, about the size of a pack of cigarettes.  How hard would that be to snatch?

[CarpeDiem54]

I don't understand what this commercial is going for. It tells me nothing about Johnsonville Brats except if you offer one to a mobster neighbor you're suddenly forced to help him cover up a crime? Why would that make me want them? I just don't get it.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=oh-BytAuxDQ

[CoyoteBlue]

All I can think of when I see people on their smartphones, walking down the street is:

 

You are holding something in your hand that cost around $500, about the size of a pack of cigarettes.  How hard would that be to snatch?

 

Yyyeah, but I'm pretty sure that if someone grabbed my smartphone, they'd have to try and escape with me clinging to them like a limpet and beating them about the head until they dropped it.

[DeLurker]

Where's my personal jetpack?

Not a jetpack, but will a hoverboard do?

[90PercentGravity]

I think the ad was for Chrysler and I have absolutely no idea what they actually said, but I heard "There's nothing wrong with flatulence, as long as you don't let the worm go back inside."

[riley702]

Oh, you have to find a link to that!

[xaxat]

I don't get the Heinz ads that talk about their ketchup being paired with the wrong yellow mustard for years.

In my experience, that yellow mustard was almost always. . . Heinz.

[Bastet]

I don't eat either mustard or ketchup, but I never even knew Heinz made mustard -- when people put out basic mustard and ketchup, all I've ever noticed it being is Heinz ketchup and French's mustard.

[Muffyn]

I think the ad was for Chrysler and I have absolutely no idea what they actually said, but I heard "There's nothing wrong with flatulence, as long as you don't let the worm go back inside."

That is the best mis-hearing of a commercial ever.  That beats my thinking that 1-800-LOAN-ME is saying 1-800-Blow-Me.  

[riley702]

I think the ad was for Chrysler and I have absolutely no idea what they actually said, but I heard "There's nothing wrong with flatulence, as long as you don't let the worm go back inside."

I think I've found it.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNyOdNLq1Bc

[GaT]

Jeff Goldblum looks like he doesn't know where the camera is, he's looking all over the place.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hK4y2WdceAE

[bilgistic]

"Pol-y-gon-al"?

[Prevailing Wind]

I just toured a Frank Lloyd Wright house and the guide kept pronouncing the shape of the house "hexaGONal"

[Haleth]

Jeff Goldblum looks like he doesn't know where the camera is, he's looking all over the place.

 

He's supposed to be a motivational speaker.  He's looking at the audience.  It's still a dumb commercial.

[sofaslug]

I think the ad was for Chrysler and I have absolutely no idea what they actually said, but I heard "There's nothing wrong with flatulence, as long as you don't let the worm go back inside."

I like your version better. XD

[Brattinella]

I reiterate: Jeff Goldblum is scraping the bottom of the barrel!  WHY? :(

[Cobalt Stargazer]

I think the ad was for Chrysler and I have absolutely no idea what they actually said, but I heard "There's nothing wrong with flatulence, as long as you don't let the worm go back inside."

 

O.O

[AntiBeeSpray]

O.O

 

My thoughts too. Eww.

[Haleth]

That might make sense for Activia, but Chrysler? 

[bigskygirl]

I am trying to figure out the new commercial for Omaha Steaks. I thought it was a commercial for Hallmark since fathers and children are saying I love you to each other. I guess nothing says love and Father Day like a big juicy steak.

[Wings]

I reiterate: Jeff Goldblum is scraping the bottom of the barrel!  WHY? :(

 

 

Money, commercials pay well.  

[Rinaldo]

Money, commercials pay well.  

Exactly. I'm always happy when an actor I know and like turns up in a much-played commercial; I think, "He'll make a decent living this year, thank goodness." An actor's life is a precarious one -- even those we might think of as having "made it" will surprisingly often quit the business and get a real-estate license, to feed the kids or whatever.

[sofaslug]

There's a Samsung washing machine ad that's running now where frantic parents are trying to calm a crying child who has spilled juice on "lambie" 2.0.

They run to the washing machine which is equipped with a sort of rinsing mechanism outside of a wash cycle. This always raises a couple of questions: couldn't they have just as easily gone to the bathroom or kitchen sink? And do they think that a soggy "lambie" is going to calm their child?

[Bastet]

That's one of the new ones with Kristen Bell and Dax Whatever, and I don't like it.  They've been charming in their other commercials, but I find them annoying in this one.  And isn't this their second kid?  I think they'd be over the "Oh, no, the kid is crying!" freak-outs.

 

The baby probably would have been happier keeping the stuffed animal with juice on it, so they could have just washed it later.  Instead, they take it away and get it wet.  No wonder s/he is crying.

[Rick Kitchen]

I am trying to figure out the new commercial for Omaha Steaks. I thought it was a commercial for Hallmark since fathers and children are saying I love you to each other. I guess nothing says love and Father Day like a big juicy steak.

 

Well, yeah.

[bigskygirl]

Another commercial I do not understand. zzzQuil. Send the kiddies away and sleep in. Are there other activities the parents would end up doing. *wink wink*

[smittykins]

I am trying to figure out the new commercial for Omaha Steaks. I thought it was a commercial for Hallmark since fathers and children are saying I love you to each other. I guess nothing says love and Father Day like a big juicy steak.

Well, humans with a Y chromosome eat MEAT, doncha know. Preferably grilled.

Edited May 29, 2015 by smittykins

[backformore]

I am trying to figure out the new commercial for Omaha Steaks. I thought it was a commercial for Hallmark since fathers and children are saying I love you to each other. I guess nothing says love and Father Day like a big juicy steak.

You also need Gary Bussey and a kite.

( celebrity apprentice reference. If you haven't seen it, it is something else!)

[Callasin]

Housemate was watching tv the other night while I was doing other things.  I kept hearing "Greg's goddess" over and over.  Finally I asked who they were talking about and was told it's "got it" not goddess.  I've seen the commercial several times now and I still do not hear "got it" only goddess.