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S03.E14: Judgment Day


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Lisa confronts Kristen about disrespect of management and makes a final decision about Kristen's SUR future. Meanwhile, Tom Schwartz discloses shocking information about his past, and Scheana contemplates not inviting Kristen to her wedding.

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I wonder if it isn't gonna come out that Schwartz did (gay?) porn or something equally as sleazy in his past. Maybe he was a male escort? But probably not, he probably just drunkenly made out with someone at a bar, or something as equally kind of blah. Yeah, cheating does suck....but there's a big difference between a drunken makeout session and full on fucking. That's how I see it, anyway. Neither is good, but the former is less bad, and probably could be forgiven. If a boyfriend of mine had sex with a girl behind my back (regardless of his sobriety status) that would be the end. No questions, no pleading, just done. I would also not hunt down said girl and start harassing her, or using her to harass my ex. That's just stupid.  

 

At this point these chucklefucks cheating on each other has become a rather mundane storyline. Happens every season.So hopefully whatever Schwartzie is hiding is something really good! I am sick of all these overly dramatic build-ups from week to week just to be disappointed and thinking "Whaaaa? That's it?!" by the episode's end. I expect better from you all, VPR!!!!


Oh Schwartz....don't you know? THE TRUTH ALWAYS COMES OUT!

That seems to be the tagline for this show. They all say it, and it's about every single time something questionable happens. Makes me laugh. It's not that hard to keep a secret. The major key is don't fucking tell people about it!!!! Same rule applies for bringing it up on "social media" as they call it. Just don't! Step away from the smartphones. I swear they all have the maturity of 13 year olds.

 

Speaking of, anyone notice they never specifically say Twitter or Facebook? They can say they tweeted something, but will never say Twitter. I guess it's so they don't get into any legal trouble with Mr. Zuckerberg and whoever created the monstrosity that is Twitter? Anyone know??

Edited by fliptopbox
  • Love 3
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I'm guessing it's that he had sex with that girl in Vegas or wherever it was (can't keep track of who slept with who where). That girl that he told Katie he made out with but did not have sex with. I feel like he may have told her they only made out to see what her reaction would be. But I had a feeling then that that wasn't the whole story. 

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I'm guessing it's that he had sex with that girl in Vegas or wherever it was (can't keep track of who slept with who where). That girl that he told Katie he made out with but did not have sex with. I feel like he may have told her they only made out to see what her reaction would be. But I had a feeling then that that wasn't the whole story.

Could be. The editing is a little wonky so I also wonder if he had confirmation of FI Tom sleeping with Miami girl or cheating on Ari in some way. Every time Katie has asked him about FI Tom's extracurricular activities he's dodged the question.

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How is implicating FI Tom in a cheating scandal going to clear Kristen's name exactly? Didn't she cheat on Tom with Jax? Didn't she lie over and over to Stassi about it? How is FI cheating vindicate Kristen? I guess I'm confused about her logic

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How is implicating FI Tom in a cheating scandal going to clear Kristen's name exactly? Didn't she cheat on Tom with Jax? Didn't she lie over and over to Stassi about it? How is FI cheating vindicate Kristen? I guess I'm confused about her logic

I think in Kristen's wonderfully twisted brain proving that Tom is just as bad a person as she is some sort of victory.

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How is implicating FI Tom in a cheating scandal going to clear Kristen's name exactly? Didn't she cheat on Tom with Jax? Didn't she lie over and over to Stassi about it? How is FI cheating vindicate Kristen? I guess I'm confused about her logic

You should only worry if you are NOT confused by Kristen's logic. I am not sure if anyone has noticed this but the girl is batshit crazy.

 

Not that I am complaining, I haven't enjoyed crazy this much since Marcia Cross left Melrose Place. Thing I have to keep reminding myself of though is that Marcia was acting. Kristen is not. 

 

It must be a measure of how messed up the rest of the chuckleheads are, but I am starting to feel really bad for Tequila Katie. Now she is going to find out that her Tom also cheated. Kinda sad, really. 

 

Maybe she just won me over when she finally told Stassi to F off. Well, basically she did anyway.

  • Love 7
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I think in Kristen's wonderfully twisted brain proving that Tom is just as bad a person as she is some sort of victory.

She is one twisted sister! She wants to "prove" he is scum but she would give her right arm to be with him again. I was messy at that age and so were all my friends but for the love of God I don't remember any of us being anywhere near this insane.

You should only worry if you are NOT confused by Kristen's logic. I am not sure if anyone has noticed this but the girl is batshit crazy.

...

Maybe she just won me over when she finally told Stassi to F off. Well, basically she did anyway.

I thank my lucky stars every day that Kristen's brand of crazy is not something I understand.

 

Katie absolutely won me over with her STFU. Up until then she was uninteresting to me. Now, all of a sudden I'm paying attention to what she says and does.

  • Love 2
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I think in Kristen's wonderfully twisted brain proving that Tom is just as bad a person as she is some sort of victory.

I think the prime directive is to debunk that Ariana's magical smug Vulcan hipster vagina is enough to keep Tom from straying. Ariana will slink away in shame and humiliation and no one will want Tom as he has proved he is inherently untrustworthy and has a tiny dick...which leaves the door open for Kristen! She will be vindicated and her friends will let her back in the circle. What could possibly go wrong?

Edited by The Mighty Peanut
  • Love 6
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Kristen claims she's trying to clear her name by exposing FI Tom? Uhm so now she's claiming she didnt bang Jax? Did I miss an episode? Doesn't "clearing" your name imply that you were falsely accused? I love watching this crazy bit but i'm so confused.

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I think the prime directive is to debunk that Ariana's magical smug Vulcan hipster vagina is enough to keep Tom from straying. Ariana will slink away in shame and humiliation and no one will want Tom as he has proved he is inherently untrustworthy and has a tiny dick...which leaves the door open for Kristen! She will be vindicated and her friends will let her back in the circle. What could possibly go wrong?

Yes! Totally in agreement. I think that to Kristen if Tom cheated on Ariana it makes her feel less bad that he cheated on her. Something like he didn't treat Ariana better than her or something. It's sad.

 

As far as the FL for this episode- I need a translator. From what I saw Kristen took Jax's phone and found a text implicating Schwartz that confirmed that Schwartz had done more than make out with the Las Vegas (?) girl. Then Jax gave Schwatz a warning and Schwartz pulled Katie aside (during a group hangout!!) and told her that he made out with a girl in Vegas. Well consider me confused. Didn't we already have an episode of Schwartz admitting that he made out with a girl in Las Vegas? So what was this new confession about? Same old same old right? On that note I agree that the cheating revelations on this show are now par for the course and not earth shattering revelations anymore. By the way Schwartz was a complete dick for telling Katie this "confession" while on a group hangout. If my boyfriend revealed something major that would hurt me while we were at a bar with friends I would be pissed. This is just thoughtless and self-serving. Obviously Shwartz was just worried that someone (Kristen) would text Katie before he could "confess".

 

So many other weird things about this episode. First I want to mention Scheana's hideous high waisted shorts. These things are just ugly- I don't know why she insists on wearing them. I'm all for women wearing whatever the hell they want, but they have all been ugly shorts that emphasize how short and curvy she is. (And Scheana has a great figure).

 

Moving on, the whole DJ session with Kristen, Jax, and Carmen at the pool was just odd. I mean talk about a setup for Kristen to find these messages and cause more drama! I'm not sure if this was a setup from Jax or from Bravo but well done guys (sort of). Even Carmen seemed to know about the text and that the phone just happened to be opened to it- so weird. Jax offering Carmen his phone to go through cracked me up. Jax telling Carmen that she was "mean" to him because she would talk about him banging other girls made me sad. Jax is an older guy preying on these younger girls with stupid lines and stupid manipulations. Yes he isn't very good at it, and you have to be a little naive to get Jaxed, but I feel bad and kind of icky for these women. Hopefully they are all just playing him for some camera time and a chance to be reality-TV famous. That way everybody wins!

 

Watching Lisa's family. Snore. If I wanted to watch Lisa I'd turn on Real Housewives. Bored with this part of the episode. Though I do have one thought. Max talking about how James has changed since Kristen was stupid. Oh yeah James would never steal drinks, its all Kristen's fault. Whatever. Where I come from a person's behavior is their own responsibility. I don't like this myth that a girlfriend or wife is responsible for their man's behavior. MMV.

 

Last question- Did anyone notice Kristen's face during her TH about catching Schwartz cheating on Katie? What a sly evil grin. It's like the more that other people get cheated on the better she feels about herself for having been cheated on. Sort of a normal human emotion, but most people couple this with some compassion and empathy, or at least have the decency to fake it in public.

 

ETA: We all know that Schena isn't having her dream wedding on a server's budget. What server can spend 40k on just flowers? We all know who paid for this wedding! I hope Scheana was joking when she said that!

Edited by Granimal
  • Love 1
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Last question- Did anyone notice Kristen's face during her TH about catching Schwartz cheating on Katie? What a sly evil grin. It's like the more that other people get cheated on the better she feels about herself for having been cheated on. Sort of a normal human emotion, but most people couple this with some compassion and empathy, or at least have the decency to fake it in public.

I agree with everything you said. Just one difference. Kristin isn't doing all of this and being so smug because she was cheated on but because she, herself, was branded a cheater and shunned by all of her friends for cheating with Jax. So that's why she feels vindicated by proving that everyone else has cheated, too. I really don't see how this is going to get her back in everyone's good graces: "Oh, Kristin, we were wrong for shunning you because everyone else is just as skanky!" But I guess she's just like, "If I'm going down, I'm taking everyone with me!" God forbid you ever cheated on your third-grade spelling test, Kristin is going to Tweet your classmate Suzy from Mrs. Crabtree's class and set up a confrontation!

  • Love 5
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How the Mighty have fallen, eh?!

 

I'm right there with you, but No Shame, No Regrets and No Excuses.  :-)

 

Scoot over and make room for my ass on the Bravo Couch of Shame.

 

I can't wait to see the fuck-and-awe unfold tonight about Schwartz's apparent pussyfooting around.

 

Only two more episodes...Dammit, Bravo, give this gem longer seasons!!!

 

Pass the vino and popcorn, please...  

  • Love 4
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I just took a break and saw the first 10-15 minutes of this (the "First Look" essentially) and the "coming up" preview.

 

I must admit that perhaps Tequila Kate is the only one of these chucklefucks who has developed any self-awareness being on this show.

 

It appears that, without benefit of a tequila kick start, she's actually refusing to stir up drama at the club and instead walking away and she's standing up to Schwartz about his cheater dog ways....and in a calm and rational manner, to boot.

 

Color me all sorts of surprised.  Of course, maybe she'll go back to being Tequila Kate before the episode is over but for now, it's a huge improvement.   

 

And Jax...Seriously.  He so clearly wanted to find a way to have Kristen see that text so she could be the one to rat out Schwartz and he could feign innocence yet again.  Even the text he sent Schwartz, that "Kristen was going through my phone and saw the texts."

 

Hey, Jax-ass, you handed Cigarette Sally that phone deliberately opened to the Schwartz texts so she could spread the gossip without you actually opening your own oversized mouth.  We see what you did, there.  

 

Once a douche, always a douche.  

 

And now I can't wait to see the rest of this episode after work.  Tick tock, tick tock...  

  • Love 10
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Even though the drama is delicious from Miami Girl and all this Kristen drama, can there please just be one episode where someone isn't either being accused of cheating or outed as a cheater? That's my only complaint about this show. The storylines keep repeating, as with the phrase "The truth always comes out..".

 

Seriously, if these people could either A. Stop cheating on each other. or B. Stop cheating on trips with all the boys....and especially Jax. Fucking learn to cover your ass, at least. I'm no cheater, but you'd think someone who was going to, even in that group, would not be that stupid to do it around the others. They can't help but gossip.


And wooooooooooooohoooooooo!!!! Cigarette Sally got fired. Finally. Anyone want to take bets how fast she'll be back though?


And I love everyone's reactions around the restaurant. Especially the cooks, and FI Tom's little silly dance.

  • Love 3
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Even though the drama is delicious from Miami Girl and all this Kristen drama, can there please just be one episode where someone isn't either being accused of cheating or outed as a cheater? That's my only complaint about this show. The storylines keep repeating, as with the phrase "The truth always comes out..".

 

Seriously, if these people could either A. Stop cheating on each other. or B. Stop cheating on trips with all the boys....and especially Jax. Fucking learn to cover your ass, at least. I'm no cheater, but you'd think someone who was going to, even in that group, would not be that stupid to do it around the others. They can't help but gossip.

And wooooooooooooohoooooooo!!!! Cigarette Sally got fired. Finally. Anyone want to take bets how fast she'll be back though?

And I love everyone's reactions around the restaurant. Especially the cooks, and FI Tom's little silly dance.

 

I absofuckinglutely expect to see her back working at SUR in either the finale or in the next season opening episode.

 

Kristen's crazy brings the ratings.  Lisa knows that.  She has to do something to punish Kristen, and I think this (probably temporary) firing is it.

 

She's suspended her before to no avail so maybe she's hoping cutting Kristen's camera time will get the message through to her.  

 

Like James, she can prostrate herself at Lisa's feet and be deigned forgiven and get her job back.  

 

PREDICTION:   LISA IS NOW DOWN ONE SERVER, A RESTAURANT TRAGEDY!!!

 

I'm predicting right now that she'll be calling Stassi to come back and fill in.

 

And I have my fingers crossed!!!!

 

Make it happen, Bravo!!!  

Edited by Persnickety1
  • Love 2
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Seeing the glee on the faces of the dishwashers (cooks?) at the news made my day.  If someone could put up a gif of that, it would make my week!

I cackled like a hen, Priceless!

Am I the only one, that has an 80's flashback seeing Cro-Mag's struggle workout video?

Reminded me of those weird ones, with those chick squatting at odd camera angles.

  • Love 5
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Two things:

● Kristen's firing will only be temporary.

● Kristen washes and stylss her hair in the morning and it STILL looks vreasy and like it smells like stale cigarettes.

● I couldn't help but notice Schwartzi's new EMO look on WWHL and laugh.

OK, that's three things...

  • Love 4
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Maybe it was just me, but it was not apparent that the 'confession' was about a 2nd girl Schwartz made out with. It sounded like the same confession he made outside of Sur, but then someone mentioned '2 girls'. Anyway when this show is able to confuse me I get a little concerned.

 

Katie looks completely different on WWHL. I mean COMPLETELY. And although she and Schwartz claim to still be together, her body language says "If I could be sitting in New Jersey right now, I would be." #notbuyingit

  • Love 3
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Now I seriously want to see crazy Kristen all decked out a la Scarlet O'Hara, proclaiming, "With Bravo as my witness, I shall never go SUR-less again!!!"

Yes! She'd be in full Scarlet regalia except with a cig and a surly expression. "Like, literally? As God as my witness, like, I know you've known me for seven years or whatever, but like you don't even know me. Do you know what I mean?"

Twirl on that.

Edited by The Mighty Peanut
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 Well consider me confused. Didn't we already have an episode of Schwartz admitting that he made out with a girl in Las Vegas? So what was this new confession about? Same old same old right? 

 

OK, so I wasn't the only confused person here. Thanks for this.

Now I seriously want to see crazy Kristen all decked out a la Scarlet O'Hara, proclaiming, "With Bravo as my witness, I shall never go SUR-less again!!!"

And I'm Gone with the Wind Fabulous!!!

  • Love 4
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Katie looks completely different on WWHL. I mean COMPLETELY. And although she and Schwartz claim to still be together, her body language says "If I could be sitting in New Jersey right now, I would be." #notbuyingit

I agree. I mentioned this in her personal thread, but to me she looks (at least possibly) pregnant. All sorts of boobage going on and she seems thicker overall and has that glow about her. I wouldn't be shocked if at the reunion there is an announcement made. That dark brownish black mop Schwartz was sporting did not look nice at all. Bad cut and worse color. Blech!

  • Love 6
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Just watching Katie & Schwartzie on WWHL.  I'm scratching my head.  Can't decide if Katie looks good with those kinda nicely (and carefully) styled extensions or if I think she resembles Bruce Jenner.  Schwartzie's hair looks particularly oddball.  A really doofus-looking style with Dumb & Dumber bangs & an inexplicably awful dye job.  I almost expect the hair color to be dripping down on his face.  And yet he still looks adorable, damn him.  Altho he's wearing no socks, and it's 18 degrees, with snow & slush everywhere.  Oy, Schwartzie is an idiot.

  • Love 3
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There were two rumors that Jax accidentally on purpose leaked twice. One was that Tom S slept with a girl in Vegas, which Tom told Katie "was bullshit" and that nothing happened with Vegas Girl...but he did admit that there was truth to the second rumor that he made out with another girl at another appearance. Now he's saying he also made out with the Vegas girl but they didn't have sex. I think it's a little creepy that he concocted a story that allowed for one truth -- a drunk kiss -- that was softened by his insistence that there was no intercourse. I think they all go to these events and have get out of monogamy free days. Jax and both Toms. Poor Peter is the roadie who takes handjobs from girls who want to get closer to the star of the show.

Edited by The Mighty Peanut
  • Love 4
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I'm happier that Stassi has disappeared into the Twilight Zone than Cigarette Sally being fired.  She ain't fired.  Not believin' it for a sec.  She's like Jack in the box.  Squeeze her into the box & she keeps popping back out.  Like Arnold, she'll be back.  Me has no doubt bout that.

  • Love 5
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I agree. I mentioned this in her personal thread, but to me she looks (at least possibly) pregnant. All sorts of boobage going on and she seems thicker overall and has that glow about her. I wouldn't be shocked if at the reunion there is an announcement made. That dark brownish black mop Schwartz was sporting did not look nice at all. Bad cut and worse color. Blech!

 

I concur.

 

And they were both extremely effusive about the idea of having kids...."someday."

 

That would be one adorable baby, that I will freely admit.  

  • Love 3
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Maybe it was just me, but it was not apparent that the 'confession' was about a 2nd girl Schwartz made out with. It sounded like the same confession he made outside of Sur, but then someone mentioned '2 girls'. Anyway when this show is able to confuse me I get a little concerned.

Katie looks completely different on WWHL. I mean COMPLETELY. And although she and Schwartz claim to still be together, her body language says "If I could be sitting in New Jersey right now, I would be." #notbuyingit

It was a little bit confusing. Schwartz seems to be a bit of a drunken make out slut. I can't remember which episode it was when they revealed that he had made out with everyone except for James. I think Katie is so over this. Like it might have been mildly amusing 3 years ago, but now she's sick and tired of being blindsided with new bullshit.

I loved the chefs celebrating Kristen's firing. She must have been a nightmare if both FOH and BOH staff were rejoicing like that.

Edited by HunterHunted
  • Love 4
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Kristen is TV gold. Watching her with Lisa and afterward was high comedy. I mean, she insisted that she didn't set out to embarass Tom, when there is videotape of her bragging about her schemes and gloating in advance!

Never change, girl, never change.

  • Love 8
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Kristen is TV gold. Watching her with Lisa and afterward was high comedy. I mean, she insisted that she didn't set out to embarass Tom, when there is videotape of her bragging about her schemes and gloating in advance!

Never change, girl, never change.

It's this sort of thing that makes me excited for the reunion.

  • Love 5
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Another great Stassi-free episode.

Hope we don't get any Kristen-free eps while Lisa figures out how to bring her back.

I liked James again. He was loyal to Kristen, saying work would be no fun without her there, etc. Muppet seems to have the best chance of being decent BF material out of this crummy bunch.

Is Scheana having candy instead of cake at her wedding? Yet spending $20k on flowers?

  • Love 3
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Katie was drinking in the clubhouse and she was wine tasting not too long ago on IG so I don't think she's pregnant. That empire waist on her dress made her look like she was hiding a belly. I thought she looked prettier than Tom tonight. 

A Jax Fitness app?! I'd rather be fat. 

I feel like I just saw Kristen in In Touch saying she still works at Sur. 

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Another great Stassi-free episode.

Hope we don't get any Kristen-free eps while Lisa figures out how to bring her back.

I liked James again. He was loyal to Kristen, saying work would be no fun without her there, etc. Muppet seems to have the best chance of being decent BF material out of this crummy bunch.

Is Scheana having candy instead of cake at her wedding? Yet spending $20k on flowers?

 

Highly, highly doubt it.

 

It's probably one of Lisa's flower sources who probably comped it for Lisa and the show or, hell, maybe Lisa is picking up the bill as it's being filmed for the show.  

 

Ain't no way that girl is spending that kind of money.  Well, except maybe in that same delusional world in which she can sing like a pop star.  

  • Love 2
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I was having deja vu watching Kristin and Muppet getting ready for work.  She must pick men who have more hair products than she does.  

 

Poor Kristin.  After giving Sur 7 years of her life, her fellow servers dance with glee and the kitchen staff high five each other upon hearing the news.  Hahaha! 

 

Tom was giving me Crispin Glover on WWHL tonight.   Not a good look.   Unless you're Crispin Glover. 

 

And yay!!!! Southern Charm is coming back!! 

  • Love 2
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Oh Please Bravo, Please, I'm begging you. Don't yank our chains this way and 'pretend fire' Kristen only to have her tearful face haunting us anymore. That would be so cruel if you did that as a joke for your viewers. Please, keep Kristin off the show forever and send her back to the farm or wherever she was bred.

 

praying.gif


Katie was drinking in the clubhouse and she was wine tasting not too long ago on IG so I don't think she's pregnant. That empire waist on her dress made her look like she was hiding a belly. I thought she looked prettier than Tom tonight. 

A Jax Fitness app?! I'd rather be fat. 

I feel like I just saw Kristen in In Touch saying she still works at Sur. 

Katie did look very pretty in the clubhouse and Tom....well!  I was shocked at first thinking he was actually wearing a Hitler wig as a joke. And the dress black shoes with no socks?  Ewww, just ewww. Katie looks hot enough to find a great looking mature-ish man that doesn't look like a desheveled broken down little lost boy from Oakland.

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Huh. Count me in as another one who thought that Katie was preggers. She certainly looked pregnant! I also noticed how excited Tom was when he answered the "are you two going to have children?" question. Though, if she was drinking on WWHL I'm at a loss. To me, she looked like a totally different person!

 

Of course in the real world Kisten should absolutely be fired! However, I'm not sure what it would mean for the show if Kristen was gone. The scene of Scheana, Ariana, and FI buying candy just didn't do it for me.

  • Love 3
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Gawd, I hope they aren't planning to give more airtime to that Kristina/Kirsten/whatever that Katie had lunch with this episode but who usually has her head implanted to the ears up Stassi's ass.

 

I just can't even find anything worthwhile about her on the show so I hope they're not grooming her as a possible Kristen replacement.

 

On the bright side, it looks like Cigarette Sally is back in full force for the wedding episodes!  

  • Love 5
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I have never gotten the style fad of guys wearing nice shoes and no socks. Brad Goreski is another offender. It looks weird and I can only imagine what the feet look like, let alone smell like, after walking around all day. Socks are a necessary barrier.

  • Love 4
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From the episode it appears that Schwartz made out with two different women in Las Vegas? Initially, when Kristen saw the text she made it sound as if it was from the original Vegas girl and the text implicated something more than making out. I think I finally understand now.

 

I'm not sure why, but this episode kind of fell flat for me. I did enjoy the dancing montages of everyone cheering when Kristen was fired. That was cute.

 

Yuck to Kristina's meeting with Katie. "Well we have to feel bad for Stassi because so much bad stuff has happened to her." Really Kristina? What the hell is this sycophant referring to? Stassi appears to live a pretty charmed life from where I sit. I mean granted she doesn't make the most of it, but she was born into wealth and lucked into reality TV fame right? Okay maybe that is a bad thing now that I think about it. However if Kristina were referring to Stassi "getting Jaxed" as this "bad thing that happened to her" then Kristina can take several seats.

 

Also didn't like Schwartz bringing up the "motor-boating" during his confession with Katie. I don't see any evidence that this actually happened. Scheana and Jax are just not reliable sources to me. Schwartz needs to focus on his own behavior, and than his lucky stars that his girlfriend was as understanding and mature as she was. I don't think anyone else on this show would have reacted so calmly. If I were Katie, I would take this as my sign to exit stage left, but I think Katie will bleed this thing until its dry.

 

What is this "honey fund" that Scheana mentioned? I'm assuming its a website where friends can give donations for Scheana's honeymoon? I have to say that I wouldn't be too horrified to see any drama happen at the wedding. Once you put your wedding on national TV and a network pays for everything then you lose the right to complain about any drama. You're kinda selling your soul to the devil here!

 

I'm very interested to see what happens with the Kristen situation. I agree with posters above who  think that this firing will be temporary. I just can't see the show progressing without Kristen. First Stassi, now Kristen. Who is left to bring the drama? These people don't live glamorous lives that would make me  want to watch without the drama factor. I watch Real Housewives to see other countries and expensive things that I will never be able to afford. But what can I see on VR? People straightening their hair and going tanning?

 

 

  • Love 3
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