Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"

[Browncoat]

My local grocery store has a perimeter wheel-lock on all their carts.  If you try to take one past the edges of their parking lot, the wheels lock.  They also have a basket of "fruit for kids" that is free small bananas or cuties or other fruit to placate the kiddies.

[EtheltoTillie]

5 hours ago, Cloud9Shopper said:

I never said it caused me a problem personally. It was meant to be a gripe, a pet peeve, of rude customer behavior. Not to mention part of the reason I wrote this post is because the kids who were allowed to open their snacks and drinks before they were paid for, and one of them threw the wrapper on the floor, which then an employee has to pick up. I didn’t expect to cause so much uproar; just a way of saying people should have better manners and teach their kids as such.

Well, if the customer threw the wrapper on the floor then they were not intending to pay.  So that's not just rude, it's dishonest. 

[Dimity]

Today's peeve - people (well specifically my brother) who expect me to share their outrage over whatever they are currently being outraged about. 

I might agree that it is something to be outraged over but I have only so much energy in me to angst over the things that are already currently outraging me.  I have to pace myself in the "what keeps we awake nights" department.   I am putting my fingers in my ears now and going "la la la I can't hear you!"

Edited June 21 by Dimity

[DisneyBoy]

It's interesting you say that. 

I was actually coming here to post about a friend that I have who routinely calls me up to complain about their love life and interpersonal relationships. I always dutifully listen and try to make jokes where I can and offer some sympathy, and even ask questions and participate in what basically amounts to their long-winded monologues and rants.

And when I say that they are long-winded, I am not kidding. We've had like 5 dozen conversations about the problems with their loved ones and they're always the same and they can go on for 45 minutes. I just listen and try to be supportive. That's what friends do, right? And if they say it all on the phone with me, then they don't say it to their loved ones and damage those relationships by being so irritated.

But then, on an odd day where I happen to call up and feel slightly depressed and want to talk about some of the relationship things going on in my life, the same friend listens silently, barely offering an "okay" as I go on, and then typically finds a way to get off the phone, saying that their partner is coming up the stairs and they need to go make dinner or something similar. 

I realize that this is probably where I should just stop putting up with this friend's BS but the truth is as we age, it's harder and harder to have relationships that go back 10 years or more because people drift and people dump you, right? So I appreciate that this person is still in my life and yes, I do laugh with them and enjoy our conversations, but they're also terribly judgmental in many ways and seem to think that their problems are far more important than mine.

I also think - no, I know - this friend has a lot of anger issues. They don't tend to like people very much in general. So having a place to vent is helpful for them and I'm happy to be able to do that for them. But I would enjoy it a heck of a lot more if it was a 2-way street. Sometimes I feel judged when I try to bring up things that I'm going through. 

It just bothers me how you can be nice to people but somehow they can think less of you for doing that. Like, if I was a jerk who basically shut down most of those conversations and told them point blank that they're being stupid or that I'm tired of hearing the same nonsense over and over, they might just respect me more for it.

But I'm not that kind of person. So I'll listen and I'll let you get it all off your chest and then after an hour on the phone, I'm going to shake my head and feel like I wasted some time there...but at the same time if it made you feel better then it's worth it, right? Why can't that be a 2-way street? Why can't this other person understand that if I'm willing to listen to them for an hour, they could listen to me for 20 minutes and try to offer some thoughtful insights or sympathetic comments or make me laugh? In fairness, they do do it on occasion, I won't lie, but it just feels like it's a 70/30 situation where I'm always the shoulder to cry on or the support system and they can opt out whenever they feel like it, as if my woes aren't worth their time.

Anyways, I'm sorry! I just had to vent about that! We need to treat our friends better and we need to be the type of friend that we want to have. 

It's just frustrating when it doesn't quite work out that way in spite of our best efforts.

Edited June 21 by DisneyBoy

[Mondrianyone]

I think I'd maybe redefine "friend" if I had one who used me as a crying towel but offered no reciprocity when I needed somebody to extend me some sympathy and a loving embrace. The person you describe doesn't seem like a friend to me. I have no trouble--well, some trouble, but not a lot--cutting off relationships when they become more of a burden than they're worth.

I understand the appeal of having someone in your life with whom you share a history. But the upside of making a new friend is that all your old stories are fresh to that person. I hear people say that it's hard to make friends once you're past a certain age, but I haven't found that to be true. I suppose it depends to a certain extent on where you are, yet it seems worth reaching out to new people and seeing what happens.
The friendship you're describing sounds painful and one-sided. No friend at all might be better than the one who's taking advantage of you like this.

[TattleTeeny]

On 6/14/2024 at 10:28 PM, TattleTeeny said:

My boyfriend keeps using the word “thingy” and it’s driving me crazy because he is using it not as a replacement for something he can’t think of the name of, but with the name of whatever it is: “where is the can opener thingy?” (double peevy because its in the same place it’s been since we moved here)…”do you want one of your beer thingies?” (a delicious grapefruit shandy!)…”I’m going to put this is the toolbox thingy.” It’s just a toolbox, man, what is happening?!

Yes, I have quoted myself — he just did it again! I was talking about how overwhelming it can be doing freelance work for multiple entities (the “juggling,” the various invoices and submission timing, the hoping you’ll have enough billable work…) and he said, “Maybe it will lead to a full-time thingy.” Job. The word is job. 

Maybe I am just extra irritable today; the stress of the previously mentioned freelance life is getting to me. He is a good boyfriend, and I don’t know why I find this so annoying, but I need him to stop it.

And here’s another peeve. Why would my phone suggest this?!

Edited June 22 by TattleTeeny

[annzeepark914]

On 6/14/2024 at 10:28 PM, TattleTeeny said:

My boyfriend keeps using the word “thingy” and it’s driving me crazy because he is using it not as a replacement for something he can’t think of the name of, but with the name of whatever it is: “where is the can opener thingy?” (double peevy because its in the same place it’s been since we moved here)…”do you want one of your beer thingies?” (a delicious grapefruit shandy!)…”I’m going to put this is the toolbox thingy.” It’s just a toolbox, man, what is happening?!

Tell him "thingie" is a teen or tween girl word.

[BooksRule]

Today's pet peeve: Setting up a new piece of technology.  My old desktop computer kicked the bucket several weeks ago and I finally got around to getting a new one (I was using a laptop plugged into my internet connection in the meantime).  Anyway, with all of the technological advances these days, why can't I just unpack a new computer, plug it in to a power source and then to the internet and let that be that?  I had to set up or restore accounts, re-install some software, not to mention the whole thing of moving out the old hardware and sorting out new cables and such.  The only silver lining was that it gave me an opportunity to move the computer desk and vacuum that area.  

I can't get sound to work, but everything else seems to be working okay, although I should have enough ports to connect a second monitor now, but don't have time right now to figure it out (I think I need a different cable).  It took up way more time than I think it should have, though.

[Spartan Girl]

People who shouldn’t be doing heavy lifting or climbing up on things for some malady or other, and refuse to listen to your warnings and insist on doing them anyway even when you’re trying to help.

Mom and I were helping a friend who had knee surgery a couple of months ago but is still having trouble getting around. We did some cleaning, but apparently the way we set up the mats around the litter box were wrong. She bent over to move them—without her cane—even as I tried to get her to let me do it since I didn’t think she should be bending over….and guess what happens? Her knee gave out and she fell. So Mom and I are both freaking out, but the friend said her knee was not hurting and she thought she was okay.

But later tonight she calls my mom saying she wound up going to the hospital because her leg started hurting real bad later in the day.

So I’m mad at myself that I wasn’t quick enough to stop her or keep her from falling, but I’m madder at her for not listening to me in the first place. I know that’s probably victim blaming but seriously. It’s frustrating how elderly/infirm people can act like little children!

[BooksRule]

1 hour ago, Spartan Girl said:

It’s frustrating how elderly/infirm people can act like little children!

I'm not too elderly yet, but I have knee problems and can't do the things I used to do.  It's frustrating for everyone.  I hate that I can't climb up into my attic to see what kind of leak I have over the stove and I'm having to hire someone to do the 'heavy' yard work these days.  But at least I still know not to do the things that I shouldn't/can't do!  (so far!)  And if I do something that I'm 'iffy' about, I try to be really careful.  I feel your frustration, though.  My dad is 92 and he does things around his house that I know he shouldn't be doing now.

[Bastet]

My dad, previously an extremely active man, has in the past couple of years accepted that his body (particularly his back) just cannot handle some of the tasks he used to do, and that in whatever years he has left (he's 80), he no longer even wants to take care of all these things himself.  But when it's a project that's beyond my skills (I'm significantly handier than the average bear, but I'm at maybe 30% of all the things he knows how to do every bit as well as someone who specializes in that skill - he was truly something in his day - plus my time is limited, and I'm no spring chicken either), so he has to hire someone, he's perfectly happy to pay someone to do it as he has the money, but so many tradespeople who do the job as it should be done have died or retired, and it's sometimes a struggle to find someone who doesn't cut corners and have an "eh, good enough" attitude.  So it can still be a challenge to keep him from doing too much when he can't find someone to do a job to his standards (which are not unreasonable), since his mind still knows how to do it, it's just the rest of his body not wanting to go along.

Edited June 23 by Bastet

[Dimity]

12 hours ago, BooksRule said:

My dad is 92 and he does things around his house that I know he shouldn't be doing now.

My dad is 89 and still driving.  God help us all.  

[oliviabenson]

On 6/21/2024 at 4:30 PM, DisneyBoy said:

It's interesting you say that. 

I was actually coming here to post about a friend that I have who routinely calls me up to complain about their love life and interpersonal relationships. I always dutifully listen and try to make jokes where I can and offer some sympathy, and even ask questions and participate in what basically amounts to their long-winded monologues and rants.

And when I say that they are long-winded, I am not kidding. We've had like 5 dozen conversations about the problems with their loved ones and they're always the same and they can go on for 45 minutes. I just listen and try to be supportive. That's what friends do, right? And if they say it all on the phone with me, then they don't say it to their loved ones and damage those relationships by being so irritated.

But then, on an odd day where I happen to call up and feel slightly depressed and want to talk about some of the relationship things going on in my life, the same friend listens silently, barely offering an "okay" as I go on, and then typically finds a way to get off the phone, saying that their partner is coming up the stairs and they need to go make dinner or something similar. 

I realize that this is probably where I should just stop putting up with this friend's BS but the truth is as we age, it's harder and harder to have relationships that go back 10 years or more because people drift and people dump you, right? So I appreciate that this person is still in my life and yes, I do laugh with them and enjoy our conversations, but they're also terribly judgmental in many ways and seem to think that their problems are far more important than mine.

I also think - no, I know - this friend has a lot of anger issues. They don't tend to like people very much in general. So having a place to vent is helpful for them and I'm happy to be able to do that for them. But I would enjoy it a heck of a lot more if it was a 2-way street. Sometimes I feel judged when I try to bring up things that I'm going through. 

It just bothers me how you can be nice to people but somehow they can think less of you for doing that. Like, if I was a jerk who basically shut down most of those conversations and told them point blank that they're being stupid or that I'm tired of hearing the same nonsense over and over, they might just respect me more for it.

But I'm not that kind of person. So I'll listen and I'll let you get it all off your chest and then after an hour on the phone, I'm going to shake my head and feel like I wasted some time there...but at the same time if it made you feel better then it's worth it, right? Why can't that be a 2-way street? Why can't this other person understand that if I'm willing to listen to them for an hour, they could listen to me for 20 minutes and try to offer some thoughtful insights or sympathetic comments or make me laugh? In fairness, they do do it on occasion, I won't lie, but it just feels like it's a 70/30 situation where I'm always the shoulder to cry on or the support system and they can opt out whenever they feel like it, as if my woes aren't worth their time.

Anyways, I'm sorry! I just had to vent about that! We need to treat our friends better and we need to be the type of friend that we want to have. 

It's just frustrating when it doesn't quite work out that way in spite of our best efforts.

That’s not a friend tbh. I’d ditch them. I had people like that in my life, they only wanted to use me to complain about life. I call them energy vampires. After saying good bye to them I feel loads better. 

[Wiendish Fitch]

Tell me if you think I'm just being an old lady yelling at a cloud...

What's with people going on the defensive over stupid shit on social media or TikTok? They think it makes them look somehow good and noble, but I think it makes them look like petty attention-seekers. You probably heard about that mom who posted a video defending her brave, bold, courageous choice to... never return shopping carts to the store or even the cart corral. Her reasoning? She didn't want to leave her kid alone in the car.

Um, couple of things....

1. Who cares?

2. Why did she feel the need to loudly announce this online? This lady is nobody, it's not as if she were being publicly dragged for it.

3. Does she realize that if she had just kept this to herself and said nothing, no one would even know? 

While I don't think everyone has to pipe down all the time, some reticence here and there won't kill you. Remember, having an opinion doesn't make you a hero, and loudly saying random crap all the time won't save the world.

[Bastet]

Just now, Wiendish Fitch said:

You probably heard about that mom who posted a video defending her brave, bold, courageous choice to... never return shopping carts to the store or even the cart corral. Her reasoning? She didn't want to leave her kid alone in the car.

No, but I remember that coming up here several years ago, that there was a thread on some other discussion board in which people were arguing over whether it's okay not to return your cart because you have kids with you.  Of course, all rational people said "um, hell no" but there was a disturbing contingent who claimed yes.  I remember it because I was so perplexed by this notion - wouldn't you just leave the kid in the car or take them with you? - I called my mom and asked her what she did with me when taking the cart back before I was big enough to be the one doing it.  She said "Either left you in the car or took you with me, what else would I do?"  So I informed her that a section of the internet would have given her license to just leave the cart randomly in the lot because she'd spawned a child.

[Dimity]

6 minutes ago, Bastet said:

So I informed her that a section of the internet would have given her license to just leave the cart randomly in the lot because she'd spawned a child.

I once saw a war break out over if it was ok to leave your child in the car at a gas station.  I thought they meant running into the gas station to pay but no, apparently there are people out there who object to you leaving your child strapped in their car seat, in your car, with you standing beside it pumping gas.

Edited June 23 by Dimity

[Quof]

43 minutes ago, Bastet said:

I remember it because I was so perplexed by this notion - wouldn't you just leave the kid in the car or take them with you? -

It's such a bullshit argument.   Moms (it's never dads) obviously carry or walk the children from the car to get the cart.  You do it again in reverse; put your groceries in your car, take your children to return the empty cart, then carry or walk your children back to the car where you started.  

[SweetieDarling]

2 hours ago, Bastet said:

No, but I remember that coming up here several years ago, that there was a thread on some other discussion board in which people were arguing over whether it's okay not to return your cart because you have kids with you.  Of course, all rational people said "um, hell no" but there was a disturbing contingent who claimed yes.  I remember it because I was so perplexed by this notion - wouldn't you just leave the kid in the car or take them with you? - I called my mom and asked her what she did with me when taking the cart back before I was big enough to be the one doing it.  She said "Either left you in the car or took you with me, what else would I do?"  So I informed her that a section of the internet would have given her license to just leave the cart randomly in the lot because she'd spawned a child.

I always parked close to a cart return corral so it wouldn't be an issue. Would she rather have other people's loose carts rolling across the parking lot into her car, or have her potential parking space blocked by an unreturned cart? Seriously, it only takes a few seconds to return a cart.

[JustHereForFood]

2 hours ago, Wiendish Fitch said:

Tell me if you think I'm just being an old lady yelling at a cloud...

What's with people going on the defensive over stupid shit on social media or TikTok? They think it makes them look somehow good and noble, but I think it makes them look like petty attention-seekers. You probably heard about that mom who posted a video defending her brave, bold, courageous choice to... never return shopping carts to the store or even the cart corral. Her reasoning? She didn't want to leave her kid alone in the car.

Um, couple of things....

1. Who cares?

2. Why did she feel the need to loudly announce this online? This lady is nobody, it's not as if she were being publicly dragged for it.

3. Does she realize that if she had just kept this to herself and said nothing, no one would even know? 

While I don't think everyone has to pipe down all the time, some reticence here and there won't kill you. Remember, having an opinion doesn't make you a hero, and loudly saying random crap all the time won't save the world.

I think social media has significantly increased some people's self-centeredness. And their need to argue with others.

[Yeah No]

On 6/20/2024 at 5:11 PM, SoMuchTV said:

Haha, I'm not even a regular Aldi's shopper, but I have an Aldi's quarter in one of the little cubbyholes in my car door.  I think they (or someone) makes a keychain that holds a quarter. 

I also have a spot in my car for Aldi quarters.  I don't mind having to pay it, I get it back anyway and sometimes nice shoppers will let you have one for free. Then when I'm done with it I give it away for free and feel like I've done my good deed for the day. It keeps the parking lot clear and the carts orderly, not to mention the prices lower because they don't have to have a person rounding them up.

On 6/20/2024 at 5:57 PM, EtheltoTillie said:

Well, if the customer threw the wrapper on the floor then they were not intending to pay.  So that's not just rude, it's dishonest. 

Thank you I was going to say the same thing. The other point is that store owners can't just let people do stuff like this on the "honor system" anymore. Unfortunately that's not the world we're living in these days. Although originally being from NYC I never lived in that world. I remember having to check my shopping bags at the door when I went to stores even 40 years ago in NY and if you dared to eat something before paying for it you got told what-for by the store managers. As my husband always reminds me (to quote "Annie Hall") we didn't "grow up in a Norman Rockwell painting".

[bluegirl147]

17 hours ago, Dimity said:

I once saw a war break out over if it was ok to leave your child in the car at a gas station.  I thought they meant running into the gas station to pay but no, apparently there are people out there who object to you leaving your child strapped in their car seat, in your car, with you standing beside it pumping gas.

Back before the pumps were self pay I always took my son inside with me to pay.  I remember driving back from a long trip and it was night and I needed gas.  My son who was 4 at the time was sound asleep. What did I do? I picked him up and carried him to pay.  I never would have dreamed of leaving him in the car.  But having my kid (and my grandkids) with me while I pump gas?  No.  Do people do this?

I don't remember the name of a book but I read a book by a woman who left her kid in the car while she ran in Walmart. She was visiting NJ I think and was on her way to the airport to fly back home and when she came out of Walmart there were cops there.  She was charged with something (child endangerment maybe) and it became a huge thing.  

Edited to add the name of the book is Small Animals by Kim Brooks.

[Dimity]

24 minutes ago, bluegirl147 said:

But having my kid (and my grandkids) with me while I pump gas?  No.  Do people do this?

IIRC this conversation I am recalling took place around the time there were a lot of articles being written about "Free Range Kids". This was started by a woman who let her 9 year old travel alone to school on public transit.  Anyway you ended up with two extremes and one extreme was the children should never be left alone anywhere, anytime no matter what.  Whether the people pushing this agenda actually followed through - well I have my doubts!

[annzeepark914]

There was also a big to-do back then about a couple in Maryland who let their two little kids walk by themselves to a playground (that was not close to their home). Lots of sneering from folks who "walked all over town" when they were kids.  Life is different today. I sure don't recall hearing (back in the day) about men breaking into houses and grabbing kids, or trying to grab them at the bus stop. 

[Anela]

29 minutes ago, annzeepark914 said:

There was also a big to-do back then about a couple in Maryland who let their two little kids walk by themselves to a playground (that was not close to their home). Lots of sneering from folks who "walked all over town" when they were kids.  Life is different today. I sure don't recall hearing (back in the day) about men breaking into houses and grabbing kids, or trying to grab them at the bus stop. 

A man grabbed my mum, when she was young, and pulled her into one of the alleyways on her street, when she was just about home. We had alleys all around that block, to cut to the next street. A neighbour came running out, and scared him off. I can't remember her name. It might have been Bridie.

I also had a weird experience when I was in an area unfamiliar to me, when I got on the wrong bus, and got off to catch my own that I saw behind it (and then it was another full one, so it didn't stop). It wasn't well-lit, and I just saw the outline of this guy - he was all dark - and he did this weird thing of moving down the bus stop seats towards me. I wasn't sure if I should run and knock on doors, when my bus appeared - totally empty. It happened. A guy broke in to rob my grandma's place, too, and mum's boyfriend chased him through the garden, and over the fence. It happened, but we also looked out for each other. 

[Dimity]

48 minutes ago, Anela said:

It happened, but we also looked out for each other. 

I think that's the biggest difference between my childhood and the childhoods of my children and grandchildren.  Yes, of course bad things did happen "back in my day" but on the flip side of that there was also almost always someone home, other adults around who could step in if needed.  On my street right now I am, as far as I can tell, the only person home.  Certainly the only person going outside anyway!  

[DisneyBoy]

On 6/23/2024 at 3:05 PM, oliviabenson said:

That’s not a friend tbh. I’d ditch them. I had people like that in my life, they only wanted to use me to complain about life. I call them energy vampires. After saying good bye to them I feel loads better. 

I believe you...but did new, more respectful, better people suddenly pop up to fill their spaces in your life? Or just different energy vampires?

I don't know if it's the way I present myself, maybe I'm too "open" or whatever, but I've had a sad number of people in my life consciously drift (like, I know they made a choice to do so, not they got busy and forgot, I just went from being inner circle to old news) and the others that I still "have" around often don't follow basic manners. Texts will be returned days later. Calls maybe a week later. Gee thanks.

And people are touchy. For instance, a friend from out of town has been visiting for 2 weeks. I knew he wouldn't reach out - he prioritizes other friends on these visits - so I finally gave in and asked if he wanted to hang out before he goes. He says yes, shows all this enthusiasm....then kept me waiting an hour and 45 minutes for him. When he finally showed up, I wanted to say WTF, but he instead introduced me to his new girlfriend and after 15 minutes I had to leave for another engagement anyway. I tried to make a joke about him being crappy with communication to get the group to laugh but...I meant it.

And guess what? I was his shoulder to cry on too, about 2 years ago, after he lost a GF and moved away! He'd call and vent for four hours at a time, and I didn't bat an eye. He needed a confidant and that was okay. I was there for him. Once he felt better, though....poof. No more regular contact. He replies when he feels like it, even to a birthday greeting. Like...?! Thanks man.

But saying " I thought we were actually friends. You treat me pretty badly. I don't do this to you - could you please stop?" would be too confrontational and surely end things so...rather than end things and be on bad terms, I just try to look the other way.

Sigh.

I'm not saying people were more genuine in the olden days, but it certainly seemed easier to navigate socializing. People were polite and either they made the effort or didn't. Either the phone rang, or it didn't.

Meanwhile, I have other friends telling me to download this or that new app because they prefer to use that for communication now. 🙄 JUST CALL OR TEXT! Cripes!

Sorry, I'm still venting here LOL.

Edited June 24 by DisneyBoy

[TattleTeeny]

At the risk of looking like the "militant vegan" stereotype,* I wish that the restaurants that have started offering the Impossible Burger (and/or whatever the other big one is) would also have nondairy cheese to go with it.

Don't get me wrong, I love, love, love that the faux-meat burger option is there now (and not that I don't also like the more common, standard black bean or "garden" burger -- but sometimes you just want a burger burger). But it would be even better to get the full effect of a cheeseburger!

*I don't find it "militant" or pushy to hope for options. Also, I do understand that the places have much less of a demand for that kind of cheese, but lactose-intolerant people would be happy too!

Quote

Life is different today. I sure don't recall hearing (back in the day) about men breaking into houses and grabbing kids, or trying to grab them at the bus stop. 

Haha, we heard stories of blatant kidnappings all the time (and quicksand and killer bees and poison candy)...and, in spite of that, were left to our own devices for large parts of the day (and sometimes night) anyway! Gen X, man.

Edited June 24 by TattleTeeny

[Ohiopirate02]

16 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

At the risk of looking like the "militant vegan" stereotype,* I wish that the restaurants that have started offering the Impossible Burger (and/or whatever the other big one is) would also have nondairy cheese to go with it.

Don't get me wrong, I love, love, love that the faux-meat burger option is there now (and not that I don't also like the more common, standard black bean or "garden" burger -- but sometimes you just want a burger burger). But it would be even better to get the full effect of a cheeseburger!

*I don't find it "militant" or pushy to hope for options. Also, I do understand that the places have much less of a demand for that kind of cheese, but lactose-intolerant people would be happy too!

I don't think you are being in anyway pushy or militant here. Vegetarian options at most fast food places are abysmal let alone vegan or dairy-free or gluten-free. And then there's the many religious individuals who choose not to eat meat. I'm Catholic and do the whole no meat on Fridays during Lent thing, and I hate that my only option at most places is a fish sandwich. Even if I actually liked fish, there is only so much fried fish one can eat in a 40 day period. There are enough people living in the US who cannot eat or will not eat your basic fast food menu, expanding past burgers, fried chicken, and the occasional pork sounds like a no-brainer. And, the overprocessed items already on most fast food places' menus point to them being able to pull off giving people vegan cheese without that much fuss. Is cheese made from cashews really that much different than the McRib or the Burger King Original Chicken Sandwich or the beef Taco Bell uses in their basic tacos?

[BlueSkies]

Pretty first world annoyances but it seems hard to find clothes that fit me right.

 

I have a big long torso but short legs.  I usually wind up buying extra large shirts but they always feel kind of long on me.  However, more often than not a large tee shirt feels too tight.

 

My waist size is 34 for jeans which would actually I think correlate with some medium shirts.  There’s no way in hell though I can fit in a medium shirt.  Actually my briefs I buy extra large as well.  I like cushion and looseness.  
 

I feel out of shape and been putting on some pounds of late but at least my pants still fit if not my briefs.  

[Yeah No]

14 hours ago, annzeepark914 said:

There was also a big to-do back then about a couple in Maryland who let their two little kids walk by themselves to a playground (that was not close to their home). Lots of sneering from folks who "walked all over town" when they were kids.  Life is different today. I sure don't recall hearing (back in the day) about men breaking into houses and grabbing kids, or trying to grab them at the bus stop. 

I've read in a few places that the reason we didn't hear about it back in the day is not because it didn't happen, but because we didn't hear about it. In fact I'm reading that the incidence of child abduction and molestation has gone down dramatically since the 1990s.

As I recall it, we started hearing more about this stuff in the late '70s. Everyone remembers the milk cartons with the missing children's faces on them in the '80s. The media and helping organizations were making these things more public for many reasons, including to spread awareness of the issue. It was because of that increased awareness that parents became increasingly afraid to let their kids walk the streets unchaperoned. I don't know if there was any sudden increase in these incidents in the '70s that prompted all this media coverage but I kind of doubt it. I think these things always happened to a degree that people were unaware of until about 45 years ago. Back in the day somehow the media didn't want to report those kinds of things. We know they kept a lot of things out of the public eye, even turning off cameras and hiding newsworthy stories to protect politicians. The really different world was actually back then.

[Yeah No]

4 hours ago, BlueSkies said:

Pretty first world annoyances but it seems hard to find clothes that fit me right.

I have a big long torso but short legs.  I usually wind up buying extra large shirts but they always feel kind of long on me.  However, more often than not a large tee shirt feels too tight.

I have trouble finding clothes that fit me too but for different reasons. Clothing manufacturers size clothing for a young person's figure. As women age their midsections tend to expand and even those hidden elastic bands in pants aren't enough to make those clothes fit right. Add to that me being high waisted and it's a nightmare, especially because I'm short!

[TattleTeeny]

6 hours ago, Yeah No said:

As women age their midsections tend to expand

If I may be a stater of the obvious and only the bare minimum of articulate...

I HATE IT! HATE! Hatey-hate-hate! Haaaaaaaaaaaate!

Generally, in the grand scheme of the world, I am probably still on the smaller side of the population. Fine, good, I appreciate the genetics. But OH MY GOD, am I ever going to not feel somewhat uncomfortable now, as if my current midsection is foreign to me -- like something that I am carrying around as opposed to an actual piece of my body? (Oh the irony of describing menopause belly in a way that could apply to pregnancy [not that I know personally about that]!)

Edited June 25 by TattleTeeny

[annzeepark914]

J.Jill clothes are forgiving.

[PRgal]

Regarding vegan burgers at restaurants:  I wish they WOULDN'T offer Impossible/Beyond burgers!  They're gross and chocked full of sodium.  I know Beyond is trying to do a better/healthier version that doesn't have as much sodium and additives, but can't they just use black beans and quinoa or something?

[Yeah No]

1 hour ago, TattleTeeny said:

If I may be a stater of the obvious and only the bare minimum of articulate...

I HATE IT! HATE! Hatey-hate-hate! Haaaaaaaaaaaate!

Generally, in the grand scheme of the world, I am probably still on the smaller side of the population. Fine, good, I appreciate the genetics. But OH MY GOD, am I ever going to not feel somewhat uncomfortable now, as if my current midsection is foreign to me -- like something that I am carrying around as opposed to an actual piece of my body? (Oh the irony of describing menopause belly in a way that could apply to pregnancy [not that I know personally about that]!)

LOL, sing it sister!  I often tell my husband I feel like I'm carrying around a floatation device. Forget the life jacket, my midsection will keep me afloat!

What people often don't get is that on a small body like mine that "floatation device" is extremely uncomfortable and makes it hard for me to bend over in a chair to pick something up (having short arms and tiny shoulders doesn't help either). I sometimes worry I'm going to rupture something just to clip my toenails!

1 hour ago, annzeepark914 said:

J.Jill clothes are forgiving.

Unfortunately they're usually not for me. I look like a house in anything too "forgiving". Another side effect of being petite is that everything too forgiving looks like a tent on you and makes you look way fatter than you already are. I have to find clothes that fool the eye with the midsection without being too flowy or large in that area. It's not an easy trick to accomplish and one reason I'm so picky about what I wear. Stacy and Clinton from "What Not to Wear" used to talk about clothes that "just skimmed the body". That's what I aim for and why I try on so many clothes before I buy anything, and why I return so much when I order online.

Edited June 25 by Yeah No

[DXD526]

It was Lenore Skenazy who popularized Free-Range Kids, and now has a website. I really enjoyed her columns when she worked at the NY Daily News. 

https://www.freerangekids.com/

As for clothes shopping, I always try on women's pants, but wind up buying men's. Those women's sizes never fit right. Give me a waist and an inseam!

[Yeah No]

 

31 minutes ago, PRgal said:

Regarding vegan burgers at restaurants:  I wish they WOULDN'T offer Impossible/Beyond burgers!  They're gross and chocked full of sodium.  I know Beyond is trying to do a better/healthier version that doesn't have as much sodium and additives, but can't they just use black beans and quinoa or something?

Impossible meat is one of my pet peeves. It is marketed in such a way that many people think it's "healthy" or at least healthier than regular meat when if you really looked at the nutrition label it is NOT, even as far as fat and cholesterol content as well as sodium. The only people that might benefit from it are vegans or vegetarians that miss the taste of real meat but don't care about the unhealthy aspects of the product. And given how health conscious most vegans I've known are, that's not a lot of people. So the companies that put this stuff out are benefiting from the fact that the general public thinks it's eating healthier by eating their product when it is NOT!

BTW, a little known fact I just found out is that 95% or higher lean beef burger meat is actually healthier and lower in fat and cholesterol than skinned chicken breast. Wow, that blew my mind. So now I eat that in moderation.

[TattleTeeny]

33 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

LOL, sing it sister!  I often tell my husband I feel like I'm carrying around a floatation device. Forget the life jacket, my midsection will keep me afloat!

What people often don't get is that on a small body like mine that "floatation device" is extremely uncomfortable and makes it hard for me to bend over in a chair to pick something up (having short arms and tiny shoulders doesn't help either). I sometimes worry I'm going to rupture something just to clip my toenails!

Right?! I feel different than I used to when I contort in some way. I've always been flexible and lacking pinchy bits, but I guess those days are over!

[KittyMom4]

2 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

am I ever going to not feel somewhat uncomfortable now, as if my current midsection is foreign to me -- like something that I am carrying around as opposed to an actual piece of my body? (Oh the irony of describing menopause belly in a way that could apply to pregnancy [not that I know personally about that]!)

I hear you! My weight has fluxuated through the years, but I have never had a weight problem until I hit menopause 4 years ago. And it is all concentrated in my stomach area. I hate it.

40 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

What people often don't get is that on a small body like mine that "floatation device" is extremely uncomfortable and makes it hard for me to bend over in a chair to pick something up (having short arms and tiny shoulders doesn't help either). I sometimes worry I'm going to rupture something just to clip my toenails!

Yes, you nailed it. 

[TattleTeeny]

This whole day is a peeve! First, as of last night, we have a boil-water advisory until further notice. Last night, I did that and filled up a few reusable bottles for drinking and for teeth-brushing, the coffee maker, the cats' fountain, whatever. This is a pain, but I was trying to avoid buying a ton of water.

But it wasn't until this morning that I thought to check with anyone at the animal shelter where I volunteer; turns out that no one else knew or had thought about it. So, I ran to the store and bought a bunch of gallons of water and dumped and washed the shelter cats' dishes and replaced the water with bottled. 

Then, I saw updated info that, in addition to the cooking and drinking, boiled or bottled should be used to wash the dishes. This was not mentioned in the advisory I read; I saw this info on a FB post with an adjacent town's boil advisory (same water source as ours). And now I am worried because, since last night, I have washed everything here and at the animal shelter with the faucet water like normal. 

I just went back out to buy paper plates and bowls, which I didn't love doing. I guess I will wash my cats' things with bottled or boiled water, but I really can't imagine having to do it for all the people dishes over the next couple of days (that's the estimation from town; hopefully they figure it out sooner). 

 

[Dimity]

So I've been out all day and just now had a chance to check my FB, well imagine my surprise to see that Keanu Reeves commented on one of my posts.  Jealous?  Don't be.  Honestly how dumb do the scammers think we are?  Don't answer, I know, pretty dumb.  Jeeze, almost word for word the same comment various unknown name people have been leaving on the FB pages of friends of mine

Quote

I always enjoy what you share here on Facebook. You seem like a nice woman. I also admire your good sense of humor here. I don't normally write in the comment section, but I think you deserve this compliment. But sending you a friend request without your consent would be rude. I'd like to be your friend if you don't mind sending me a friend request. 

The really funny thing is the comment was under a recipe a few of my family members had asked me to share.  Glad "Keanu" found I showed a good sense of humour with my Grandmother's cabbage rolls recipe.

Edited to add: checked my settings and somehow I had changed the "who can see what you post" setting to public.  I have know changed it back to "almost no one unless they've passed the initiation rites" option!

Edited June 25 by Dimity

[JustHereForFood]

Considering the talk about cars and that summer (and with it, extreme heat) is starting in the northern hemisphere, here's a reminder that one should never leave a kid or a pet in their car alone, no matter how short they plan to stay away. It can get overheated a lot more quickly then people might think and lead to terrible disasters.

10 hours ago, PRgal said:

Regarding vegan burgers at restaurants:  I wish they WOULDN'T offer Impossible/Beyond burgers!  They're gross and chocked full of sodium.  I know Beyond is trying to do a better/healthier version that doesn't have as much sodium and additives, but can't they just use black beans and quinoa or something?

9 hours ago, Yeah No said:

 

Impossible meat is one of my pet peeves. It is marketed in such a way that many people think it's "healthy" or at least healthier than regular meat when if you really looked at the nutrition label it is NOT, even as far as fat and cholesterol content as well as sodium. The only people that might benefit from it are vegans or vegetarians that miss the taste of real meat but don't care about the unhealthy aspects of the product. And given how health conscious most vegans I've known are, that's not a lot of people. So the companies that put this stuff out are benefiting from the fact that the general public thinks it's eating healthier by eating their product when it is NOT!

BTW, a little known fact I just found out is that 95% or higher lean beef burger meat is actually healthier and lower in fat and cholesterol than skinned chicken breast. Wow, that blew my mind. So now I eat that in moderation.

Yes, please. I wish people, especially if they want to eat healthier and environmentally-conscious, would move more towards eating naturally vegetarian food, instead of all that overprocessed stuff. Plus, eating more seasonal + local when possible.

[TattleTeeny]

Quote

Yes, please. I wish people, especially if they want to eat healthier and environmentally-conscious, would move more towards eating naturally vegetarian food, instead of all that overprocessed stuff. Plus, eating more seasonal + local when possible.

Quote

Regarding vegan burgers at restaurants:  I wish they WOULDN'T offer Impossible/Beyond burgers!  They're gross and chocked full of sodium.  I know Beyond is trying to do a better/healthier version that doesn't have as much sodium and additives, but can't they just use black beans and quinoa or something?

Here's the thing though: Sometimes we care about and do all of that. And other times, we want something that tastes like a normal burger. Black beans and quinoa, as good as they can be, do not. 

Additionally, sometimes we just want an easy option for when we are eating with other people. I eat pretty well when I am at home, but sometimes I want to eat some junk food at a restaurant or at a barbecue or whatever, like omnivores everywhere do. Eating a Beyond or Impossible burger here and there is not an indication of a wholly unhealthy diet or evidence that the person who orders it eats only junk (and it’s not like a real burger, as well as a ton of other stuff on the average menu, isn’t just as unhealthy in its own way).

But if we’re wishing that things we personally disagree with weren’t offered on menus, then I wish to ban every iteration of onion, scallion, and leek! Oh, and those god-awful sizzling fajitas too.

Edited June 26 by TattleTeeny

[Yeah No]

4 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

Additionally, sometimes we just want an easy option for when we are eating with other people. I eat pretty well when I am at home, but sometimes I want to eat some junk food at a restaurant or at a barbecue or whatever, like omnivores everywhere do. Eating a Beyond or Impossible burger here and there is not an indication of a wholly unhealthy diet or evidence that the person who orders it eats only junk (and it’s not like a real burger, as well as a ton of other stuff on the average menu, isn’t just as unhealthy in its own way).

I'm a meat eater but I confess I have a love of fast food burgers. They're one of those things I've given up for the most part, though in an attempt to control my weight and my "numbers". I like to think I allow myself one Whopper or Big Mac a year but when I think about it I know I haven't had either one in over 2 years now (and I do keep a food diary so I can verify that). I have had chicken nuggets, filet o fish and Egg McMuffin once or twice since then, though. Speaking of that my husband brought me home an Egg McMuffin last week after he heard me wishing I could have one. It tasted sooo good, better than the ones I make at home. It just has that "somethin'-somethin'" you can't duplicate at home. So I get it and I agree, it's not bad to indulge once in a while, as long as it's just that - once in a while even if for you that means having an impossible burger. I've actually never tried one. I wonder if they really do taste like the real thing. I have a sensitive palate so knowing me I'd probably say I could tell it wasn't really beef.

[Suzn]

14 hours ago, TattleTeeny said:

Here's the thing though: Sometimes we care about and do all of that. And other times, we want something that tastes like a normal burger. Black beans and quinoa, as good as they can be, do not. 

Additionally, sometimes we just want an easy option for when we are eating with other people. I eat pretty well when I am at home, but sometimes I want to eat some junk food at a restaurant or at a barbecue or whatever, like omnivores everywhere do. Eating a Beyond or Impossible burger here and there is not an indication of a wholly unhealthy diet or evidence that the person who orders it eats only junk (and it’s not like a real burger, as well as a ton of other stuff on the average menu, isn’t just as unhealthy in its own way).

 

There are so few options for vegetarians in fast food, I don't know why Impossible burgers have to go away just because someone disapproves of them!  If I choose to eat them, it doesn't necessarily indicate the quality of my diet overall.  Not to mention that I would not suggest outlawing foods you eat that I dislike or disapprove of.

[EtheltoTillie]

Pet peeve:  The silverware marks have returned to my porcelain bowls.  I posted a couple of days ago in the housekeeping hacks thread about how I used Barkeeper's Friend to remove ugly scratch marks.  Well, they came right back--or rather new ones appeared.  I was using a fork on this bowl and it created a bunch of new marks.  It's as if I were using a Magic Marker!  I hope you can see it. 

 

Edited June 26 by EtheltoTillie

[TattleTeeny]

Right. Another example is when I (or anyone, really) goes to a fair or a concert or down the shore* and eat "garbage" -- or at least probably less well than you might at home. 

*I'm from Jersey; we don't do the "at" after or instead of the "down."

 

9 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I'm a meat eater but I confess I have a love of fast food burgers.

Not going to lie -- I miss them (to be honest, I miss a lot of stuff)! I didn't eat much meat before going vegan, but what meat I did eat was typically fast food. 

Edited June 26 by TattleTeeny

[chitowngirl]

I seem to have a superpower of having gas prices go up a bit when I need to fill up.

[Anela]

1 hour ago, TattleTeeny said:

Right. Another example is when I (or anyone, really) goes to a fair or a concert or down the shore* and eat "garbage" -- or at least probably less well than you might at home. 

*I'm from Jersey; we don't do the "at" after or instead of the "down."

 

Not going to lie -- I miss them (to be honest, I miss a lot of stuff)! I didn't eat much meat before going vegan, but what meat I did eat was typically fast food. 

I used to like Morningstar farms, when I was a vegetarian, but I can rarely find them now.  I didn’t like the “impossible” or “beyond” fake meat when I tried it. I wa surprised to see the veggie meat replacement I used to use in things like sour cream and noodle bake, in fresh thyme, but the name has slipped my mind again.  Gimme lean! 

[supposebly]

I eat very little red meat because I hate how most animals are raised for food and because of the carbon footprint of raising them. I'm also trying to make up a bit for all the meat my cats eat. And the car I bought last year.

Having the occasional impossible meat in a chili or burger or Bolognese sauce accomplishes that for me. 

I cook my own food most of the time and most of my animal protein comes from fish or shrimp, and the occasional chicken from the small farm from around here.  

I'm not trying to be vegetarian or vegan, just mindful of the amount of animals I eat and how they've been raised. It's not because of health reasons. I don't have any food related health issues, so that was never my concern.

Now if I can have labgrown milk and there will be cheese from it, I would be very happy. Cheese, I can't give up. And real milk in my coffee. Oatmilk works in my muesli and for pancakes. Just not in coffee.

Edited June 26 by supposebly