Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"

[Quof]

Hell, no. That's when you slam into their Achilles tendons with your cart. 

[StatisticalOutlier]

1 hour ago, forumfish said:

5 hours ago, Bastet said:

They're not eavesdroppers if you're chatting away while they shop, are they?  The conversation isn't private (you've made it public), and they're not doing anything covert; they can't help but overhear.

Yes, I realize talking on the phone in public means anyone within earshot can overhear.

"Can't help but overhear" is not the same as "can overhear," and therein lies the peeve.

[MargeGunderson]

12 hours ago, ParadoxLost said:

I liked this because I could give up the cell phone but need the TV.  But then you said you said you could give up the internet.  Nope.  Can't do that.

Today's topic is again is inconsiderate shoppers who think their time is more valuable than everyone else's.

Today someone made a bad choice on which line to stand in  Her line was going much slower than the one I got into.

But here's the thing.  Making a aggressive swerve cut in my line and then saying 'hope you don't mind' is not the same thing as asking if you can go first because you've been there a long time and the person in front of you is taking forever.

I'm nice, I would have said no problem, go ahead to the latter.  But the former is no more considerate than not saying anything.  It irritates me that this person probably thinks they aren't an asshole because they asked if it was ok as they were starting their transaction.

Oh, HELL no! I routinely let people go in front of me if they have just a couple of things and I have a cart full (or even just half a cart). But if you try to cut in front of me my wrath will rain down. 

[Moose135]

3 hours ago, MargeGunderson said:

I routinely let people go in front of me if they have just a couple of things and I have a cart full (or even just half a cart).

I was at WalMart or Target or one of those type of stores one day, with a wagon full of stuff.  I noticed the woman behind me with one small item, and I offered to let her go ahead of me.  I did tell her "If you're the millionth customer or something, we're splitting the prize!"

[riley702]

6 hours ago, MargeGunderson said:

Oh, HELL no! I routinely let people go in front of me if they have just a couple of things and I have a cart full (or even just half a cart). But if you try to cut in front of me my wrath will rain down. 

I'm the same with a lane of traffic that is ending and everyone knows it. I may let a semi over, as I'm going to assume a lot of cars won't let them merge, but the asshole who runs down the ending lane to try to slam in front of the line is going into the ditch if it's me. And I will take enormous pleasure while doing so.

[NutMeg]

On 4/9/2018 at 5:13 AM, BookWoman56 said:

Thanks, @SuprSuprElevated, I was able to find twin beds on various sites; it was just the classification of them as automatically being kids beds that I found annoying. @Bastet,  while I agree that it's very common for twin beds to be kids beds, I grew up watching television shows in which it seemed common for the master bedroom to have two single beds, and my understanding from a few Jewish friends who are Orthodox is that two single beds in the master bedroom is fairly typical as well, or one full bed and one twin in a matching style. Admittedly those TV shows were made in the late 50s and early 60s, so there were weird attitudes about what you could show; IIRC, Mary Tyler Moore commented that while doing the Dick Van Dyke show that if she was on the bed in the master bedroom, at least one foot had to be touching the floor. But in any case, my attitude at this point in my life is I don't want to share a bed with another human. Cats or dogs, possibly; humans, no. I remember years ago when a boyfriend and I decided to move in together, he was insistent we have separate bedrooms. I was surprised, but in a few days realized I liked separate bedrooms as well.  I like having my own space. As far as the bed sizes, I think the trend in the last few decades toward queen and king beds is just consumerism finding a way to convince people that bigger is better, with a corresponding larger price tag. Obviously, this is all a minor issue but I just think it's foolish to market twin and full beds as being suitable only for children. 

My guest bedroom has an ikea bed which is 120x200 cm, perfect for the single guest who wants more space or is too tall for the classic 200 cm length.

On 4/9/2018 at 5:34 AM, Sun-Bun said:

Funny you mention this—-I dunno what happened to me around my mid-30’s or so, but I gradually quit calling people as regularly; aside from my mom and her daily calls, I’ve grown to just loathe making phone calls. Maybe it’s social media’s fault, maybe it’s our current texting culture’s fault, maybe I’m just getting old and bored with former social expectations, but I just don’t bother to have the long daily phone chats that I used to...but I do know that I also hate making calls nowadays. Even to call/call back friends feels like such a chore; most of the time we just text and/or WhatsApp and we make plans to meet up.

Or maybe society really is just giving up on those former social norms...I don’t know how to feel about that, honestly. There was something so oddly endearing about growing up in an era when you spent hours just shooting the shit with friends/significant others over the phone.

I too miss the days of long phone calls. I recently moved back to a city I lived in years ago, and with one of my oldest friends, I still have those long talks on the phone, as well as with a good friend from where I lived before. But yes, that is the exception.   

On 4/9/2018 at 8:30 AM, backformore said:

My ongoing pet peeve has to do with phone calls.   Making a non-personal phone call - to an insurance company, utility company, a store, etc.   I go through the menu, use the keypad, or voice, to put in info- phone number, order number, claim number, etc, then I talk to an actual person, who asks for my name, phone number, account number, item/claim/whatever number, reason for my call,  etc.  They use all this information to figure out who best can help me.  Then they transfer me to that person, who then asks me my name, phone number, account number, etc., etc.   They have these fancy complicated phone systems.  I KNOW there is a way to put that information on the network so that when you transfer me to the person you think will help me (in reality that person will end up transferring me to someone else) they HAVE that information.  It seems like I have to start all over with each person I get transferred to.  

I hate those too, and miss the day when we could talk to real people who could orient us towards where the problem was. A pet peeve of mine (well, more than a pet peeve, actually) is that middle class jobs are being automated, which sure helps companies' bottom line, but doesn't help either with employment or with dealing with an ageing society. And the society, it is ageing. And some companies are looking into how to address that, and mainstream companies are still "our 'hip' way or the highway". I'm not even old, but I'm pessimistic about this and hope companies course-correct, or, maybe even better, that newcomers offer what they don't. (Would serve them right for not listening to their customers...)

 

23 hours ago, emma675 said:

Anyway, moving on, Internet Explorer is my peeve today. My new company still uses it and it can show things so differently than Chrome. I need Chrome as part of my job but I have to request it from IT, I can't just download it myself. Ugh.

I'm really curious, how does IE show things differently than Chrome? 

20 hours ago, forumfish said:

Apologies if any of you see me walking around a store, talking on the phone. It's most likely:

1) related to my self-employment -- I can't afford not to answer the phone if it's the person who hired me. I do ask if I can call them back from my car. Sometimes, they only have "just one question," though; or

2) my mom, who called to tell me something I need to pick up for her; or

3) my best friend -- between her teaching schedule, my caregiving duties and the time difference, oftentimes the only time I have to chat with her is while I'm out running errands. It always amuses me when I ask her about her side job, which is participating in "murder mystery" dinner theatre. I love seeing the looks on eavesdroppers' faces when I ask, "who do you get to kill this time?"

Today's peeve -- when I set up an organization system for someone and he refuses to use it (yes, Dad, I mean you).

We judge people based on our mood that day, without knowing anything about their lives. You've humbled me by providing mucho exemples of conversations that could be deemed "can wait" but are not in your case. So, here's to wishing you an improvement in your circumstances as much as possible, people around you who are of the nicest kind and, when you face the opposite, a rhino skin to disregard it all, because you know what it's about and those outsiders don't. 

[auntlada]

4 minutes ago, NutMeg said:

I hate those too, and miss the day when we could talk to real people who could orient us towards where the problem was.

As long as the real people have sense. Where I used to work, the people who answered the phone in the front office would (I honestly believe) randomly transfer people without finding out exactly what the person wanted. Inevitably, the call would end up with me, and I would not be remotely the person the caller wanted. The only thing I could do was put them on hold and go and find who they needed to talk to. Then I would tell that person, "I'm transferring a call to you, and this is what the caller wants." Usually it was someone who wanted to buy an ad, and the caller would get transferred to the newsroom, where I was. People wanted to give us money, and the idiots answering the phone -- and then two or three following people -- would send them all around the building before they got to me. I never knew why I seemed to be the only one in the building who knew what people handled what jobs.

[StatisticalOutlier]

2 hours ago, riley702 said:

I'm the same with a lane of traffic that is ending and everyone knows it. I may let a semi over, as I'm going to assume a lot of cars won't let them merge, but the asshole who runs down the ending lane to try to slam in front of the line is going into the ditch if it's me. And I will take enormous pleasure while doing so.

This was discussed upthread.  Filling in all the lanes and merging at the end point is called the zipper merge and it makes the traffic move faster.  The asshole is actually doing it right, and some places have started putting up signs telling people to use all lanes until the merge point.

[SuprSuprElevated]

55 minutes ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

This was discussed upthread.  Filling in all the lanes and merging at the end point is called the zipper merge and it makes the traffic move faster.  The asshole is actually doing it right, and some places have started putting up signs telling people to use all lanes until the merge point.

Okay, but do we still get to be peeved because they don't realize they're doing it right?  They just know they're being an asshole.

[MargeGunderson]

1 hour ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

Okay, but do we still get to be peeved because they don't realize they're doing it right?  They just know they're being an asshole.

I’m in Massachusetts so it’s definitely asshole.

[ABay]

Masshole is how I've heard it.

[riley702]

2 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

This was discussed upthread.  Filling in all the lanes and merging at the end point is called the zipper merge and it makes the traffic move faster.  The asshole is actually doing it right, and some places have started putting up signs telling people to use all lanes until the merge point.

Flying down the ending lane and then trying to force himself in front of the furthest car possible isn't being a zipper, it is definitely being an asshole.

Edited April 13, 2018 by riley702

[MargeGunderson]

46 minutes ago, ABay said:

Masshole is how I've heard it.

We have T-shirts!

Sort of related: drivers in my part of MA are not consistent in their use of turn signals. As part of a safe driving campaign involving signs on our local freeways:

Sadly I’ve seen no evidence to indicate it was effective.

Edited April 13, 2018 by MargeGunderson

[Moose135]

5 hours ago, SuprSuprElevated said:

Okay, but do we still get to be peeved because they don't realize they're doing it right?  They just know they're being an asshole.

You can be peeved, but I know I'm doing it right.

[SuprSuprElevated]

6 hours ago, Moose135 said:

You can be peeved, but I know I'm doing it right.

We all know what we know, lol.

[KittyMom4]

18 hours ago, auntlada said:

As long as the real people have sense. Where I used to work, the people who answered the phone in the front office would (I honestly believe) randomly transfer people without finding out exactly what the person wanted. Inevitably, the call would end up with me, and I would not be remotely the person the caller wanted. The only thing I could do was put them on hold and go and find who they needed to talk to. Then I would tell that person, "I'm transferring a call to you, and this is what the caller wants." Usually it was someone who wanted to buy an ad, and the caller would get transferred to the newsroom, where I was. People wanted to give us money, and the idiots answering the phone -- and then two or three following people -- would send them all around the building before they got to me. I never knew why I seemed to be the only one in the building who knew what people handled what jobs.

Same here, my department ends up with callers asking about our fleet maintenance needs or an accounts payable question/issue. We call it "dumping" and our 3 live operators are pros at it. I once pointed out to them that it only takes a couple quick questions to the caller to find out where they need to go, I got "Well, it's not my job to ask specifics, that's your job." as an answer. I'm not a fan of automated systems but at least the caller would have a better chance of landing in the area that can help them, whereas I have to put them on hold, look up the person's extension, transfer the caller and explain to the department what the caller needs. I imagine the caller rolling his/her eyes at our incompetence, and I don't blame them.

[MrSmith]

On 3/23/2018 at 1:03 AM, AgentRXS said:

My annoying next door neighbor is complaining that he has bugs in his kitchen (our kitchens are adjacent to each other)  so I was informed that I need to be home tomorrow to let the exterminator inspect my unit as well. Even though I've never seen a bug in the 5 years I've been living here,so presumably my cats do any exterminating for me.

So now I have to use up a vacation day for no reason. I am pissed. I am also concerned that the pest control stuff will pose a risk to my cats. This is the same neighbor that comes onto his front porch every time I sit on mine, and smokes his cigarettes, and lets the smoke waft in my direction. I think I am going to talk to her about the smoking issue if she comes by tomorrow with exterminator.

Take a fan with you onto your porch, aim at her, and set it on high. She'll get the message PDQ.

On 3/23/2018 at 4:47 PM, bilgistic said:

We were talking about vacuums a few days ago. I just vaccuumed and was reminded how astoundingly terrible my vacuum is (Hoover upright red plastic piece of shit). I would like to drop if off a tall building.

I live in an 800-square-foot apartment and it takes half an hour to vacuum because I have to go over everything three to 10 times. Half of the time, it spits back out more cat hair and dirt than it just picked up.

I need to start a GoFundMe for a new vacuum.

Check out the Shark vacuums. My wife loves hers and got it for $100 or $150. I know you may still need a GoFundMe, but at least it'll be easier to reach. :)

[MrSmith]

On 3/24/2018 at 11:51 AM, DeLurker said:

That's my next step - I'll use it in the house and then go around the outside and dust near the house and any windows where they might be entering.  

I'm used to the Ants of August when the little tiny ones come looking for water, but these were good sized ones - but not fire ants thank goodness.  We're already seeing a lot of fire ants this year since the last few months have been so wet.

Ants find cinnamon to be poisonous to them. They will not cross it. We used it once to prevent their incursions to our apartment from the unit below ours where a complete slob lived. They were climbing the kitchen drain pipe and coming in from under the kitchen sink. My wife put cinnamon under/around the edges of the sink. It's not a permanent solution, unless you make sure it's always there. So, not great, but workable.

On 3/24/2018 at 9:23 PM, Nordly Beaumont said:

I know three people that have gotten Roombas  - they all love them. Two of them love them so much they've given the Roombas names and treat them like pets!

I'm tempted to get a Roomba just to see if our orange tabby cat will ride it.

[TattleTeeny]

On 4/12/2018 at 8:43 AM, MargeGunderson said:

Oh, HELL no! I routinely let people go in front of me if they have just a couple of things and I have a cart full (or even just half a cart). But if you try to cut in front of me my wrath will rain down. 

Oh, what about the ones at the END of the line who go a'runnin' when another cashier yells, "I can help the next person." The "next person" is not YOU, end-of-the-line guy!

[bilgistic]

6 hours ago, MrSmith said:

Check out the Shark vacuums. My wife loves hers and got it for $100 or $150. I know you may still need a GoFundMe, but at least it'll be easier to reach. :)

I ended up getting a highly rated Shark from Bed Bath & Beyond, using a 20% off coupon and going through a cashback site. It was less than $150. I can't afford it, but my old, cheap Hoover vacuum just wasn't working anymore. The cost of the new vacuum was less than two sessions from my housekeeper who probably thinks I "fired" her six months ago since I haven't contacted her to come by.

The new vacuum is pretty fantastic. Along with vacuuming the floor, I used the hose and attachments to vacuum the cats' window seat and cat tree. I could've built another cat with all the hair that I vacuumed up. I am hoping it will entice me to dust with the attachments and maybe enjoy vacuuming a bit more. It's amazing how different the carpet feels after just the one run.

The old, terrible Hoover is going to the hazardous-waste/electronics/etc. recycling center soon. I need to take a bunch of stuff like dead batteries and broken CFL lightbulbs.

I typed "vacuum" so many times that the word looks weird now.

Edited April 14, 2018 by bilgistic

[TattleTeeny]

Fill out your warranty, @bilgistic! I know a lot of people have good luck with Shark products but I am not one of them! That's not to say they're not great, because they are. But mine--steam mop, and two hand-vacs--were all fine and good until they suddenly just weren't and it made me nuts!

[StatisticalOutlier]

On 4/12/2018 at 6:08 PM, riley702 said:

Flying down the ending lane and then trying to force himself in front of the furthest car possible isn't being a zipper, it is definitely being an asshole.

But that pretty much is the definition of being a zipper--using every lane until the merge point.  And at the merge point, people take turns, so there's no forcing.

Think about how some places have two lanes turning left onto a freeway entrance ramp, and it quickly necks down to one lane just after the turn.  (Or on surface streets--I see it there, too, where a lane gets added just before the intersection, and goes away shortly after it.)  You know what it's like when there's a long single line of cars to get going from being stopped--each one has to take off, and then there's a pause and the one behind takes off, and the whole line of cars gets going only by one-by-one lurching.  If you have two cars side by side, they can get moving at the same pace, with no lag, and then merge while moving, which is infinitely more efficient than merging into completely stopped traffic.

It works, and it's fair. 

[Katy M]

11 minutes ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

But that pretty much is the definition of being a zipper--using every lane until the merge point.  And at the merge point, people take turns, so there's no forcing.

Think about how some places have two lanes turning left onto a freeway entrance ramp, and it quickly necks down to one lane just after the turn.  (Or on surface streets--I see it there, too, where a lane gets added just before the intersection, and goes away shortly after it.)  You know what it's like when there's a long single line of cars to get going from being stopped--each one has to take off, and then there's a pause and the one behind takes off, and the whole line of cars gets going only by one-by-one lurching.  If you have two cars side by side, they can get moving at the same pace, with no lag, and then merge while moving, which is infinitely more efficient than merging into completely stopped traffic.

It works, and it's fair. 

It might be fair if everyone does it.  If everybody else is merging beforehand, and one person goes zipping through the line, it tends to lose the appearance of fairness.

[bilgistic]

30 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

Fill out your warranty, @bilgistic! I know a lot of people have good luck with Shark products but I am not one of them! That's not to say they're not great, because they are. But mine--steam mop, and two hand-vacs--were all fine and good until they suddenly just weren't and it made me nuts!

I did; I registered my purchase with Shark online. The vacuum has a five-year(!) warranty, so here's hoping I have many years of trouble-free vacuuming with it.

[theredhead77]

Congratulations on your new vacuum @bilgistic! I think I had the same old Hoover you did before upgrading to my Shark. Before sending my Hoover out to the vacuum farm I did one last go-over then immediately vacuumed with the Shark. OMG the difference even immediately after! 

[BookWoman56]

2 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

But that pretty much is the definition of being a zipper--using every lane until the merge point.  And at the merge point, people take turns, so there's no forcing.

Think about how some places have two lanes turning left onto a freeway entrance ramp, and it quickly necks down to one lane just after the turn.  (Or on surface streets--I see it there, too, where a lane gets added just before the intersection, and goes away shortly after it.)  You know what it's like when there's a long single line of cars to get going from being stopped--each one has to take off, and then there's a pause and the one behind takes off, and the whole line of cars gets going only by one-by-one lurching.  If you have two cars side by side, they can get moving at the same pace, with no lag, and then merge while moving, which is infinitely more efficient than merging into completely stopped traffic.

It works, and it's fair. 

If that were what people around here did, I would have no objections. My issue is with the fuckers who are driving not in the lane that is ending, but on the shoulder adjacent to it, and then where both the lane and shoulder end, merge off the shoulder, across the lane that is ending, and onto the continuing lane. 

[DeLurker]

On the subject of vacuums...I did a test yesterday.  I vacuumed the carpeted area downstairs with my Bissell Pet Something or another.  It has a canister so you can clearly see that it is working because it gets filled up with an abundance of pet hair each time I use it (which is about daily).  Most of the hair comes from Kokuma since he is a big fluffy shedding hairball.

So I take my time vacuuming each time I do it, because having pets demands it.  I repeatedly vacuumed with the Bissell, emptying the canister between rounds, to make sure there was no more pet hair it was catching.  Took 3 rounds of vacuuming.

Immediately after that, I vacuumed the same areas with the Dyson cordless I got last fall.  And despite my excessive vacuuming with the Bissell to collect all pet hair, the Dyson canister revealed their was still more that the upright hadn't manage to pick up. 

I knew the Bissell was not perfect, but I had no idea that it was that mediocre at best.  Knowing this, I am now going to have to buy another upright and can no longer put it off because the one I have is still working and does at least a decent job.

[Blergh]

OK, I don't know how commonplace a pet peeve this is but here goes: I hate it when I do something I know I'd be furious at another person having done to me- as the other day when I cut in front of someone else to get a parking place. Yep, too bad that THAT had to be their first impression of me thanks to my lack of patience.

[Moose135]

17 hours ago, Katy M said:

It might be fair if everyone does it.  If everybody else is merging beforehand, and one person goes zipping through the line, it tends to lose the appearance of fairness.

But it's not my fault other people don't know how to do it the right way.

Couple of years back, I'm on the highway in Pennsylvania coming up to a long-term construction area - one with the "use both lanes to merge point" signs.  Traffic is real slow, I'm in the left hand lane, and we get to a sign that says "Right Lane Ends 1 Mile".  Old guy in a pickup next to me forced me onto the shoulder because he needed to merge into the left lane at the sign.

[Katy M]

31 minutes ago, Moose135 said:

But it's not my fault other people don't know how to do it the right way.

Couple of years back, I'm on the highway in Pennsylvania coming up to a long-term construction area - one with the "use both lanes to merge point" signs.  Traffic is real slow, I'm in the left hand lane, and we get to a sign that says "Right Lane Ends 1 Mile".  Old guy in a pickup next to me forced me onto the shoulder because he needed to merge into the left lane at the sign.

Majority rules.

[bilgistic]

I took the old Hoover and all the rest of my household waste to the recycling center. I got rid of old car touch-up paint, dead batteries, light bulbs, an old electric razor, the old dryer hose, etc. It feels great to have that crap gone.

I need to do a purge of my closet and drawers and make the semi-annual donation trip to Goodwill, but not today.

[Moose135]

1 hour ago, Katy M said:

Majority rules.

So like my mother would say, if everyone was jumping off a cliff, you would too?

[Moose135]

My windshield washer was spraying very poorly for a while, and I had been meaning to do something with it.  I took a look under the hood, and didn't see anything out of sorts.  Someone on the Durango forum I frequent posted about a similar problem, and how a loose connection was causing a leak, but it seemed he was the only guy with a connection in that spot - it must have been repaired at some point.  I figured I would look to see if maybe I had a leak somewhere too.  Given the size and arrangement of things, I had the hood up, the driver window open, I reached in the window to hit the washer switch while I looked in from the side near the hood hinge.  I hit the switch and got a face full of washer fluid - good thing I was wearing glasses!  Turns out the hose wasn't connected tightly to the nozzle.  Pushing it back into place took care of everything, but next time, I'll have a helper if I need to troubleshoot something like that!

[TattleTeeny]

1 hour ago, bilgistic said:

I took the old Hoover and all the rest of my household waste to the recycling center. I got rid of old car touch-up paint, dead batteries, light bulbs, an old electric razor, the old dryer hose, etc. It feels great to have that crap gone.

I need to do a purge of my closet and drawers and make the semi-annual donation trip to Goodwill, but not today.

Just found out the BF's 13-year-old niece is the same size foot as me, so two pairs of impulsively bought, rarely worn black boots out of the closet today--when I just so happen to be seeing his sister later! It's a start!

Edited April 14, 2018 by TattleTeeny

[theredhead77]

5 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I need to do a purge of my closet and drawers and make the semi-annual donation trip to Goodwill, but not today.

I hate Goodwill (for several reasons) and donate my clothes to Zappos for Good. You box it up and take it to UPS using their pre-paid label. It also works well for my lazy factor.

@DeLurker did you clean / empty the filter on the other vacuum?

I use a little stick vacuum for the day-to-day, and haul out the Shark once a week. I really really want to get that Roomba but other things that also cost $300 keep popping up.

[DeLurker]

10 hours ago, theredhead77 said:

@DeLurker did you clean / empty the filter on the other vacuum?

Religiously.

[StatisticalOutlier]

18 hours ago, Katy M said:

Majority rules.

When the majority is acting out of ignorance, I have to disagree. 

In the original discussion of this, it was suggested that those of us who understand how it works could lead by example.  I don't have much (well, any) hope for that, but if every person who's mad about sitting in that long single line would get mad enough to do something about it and get in the open lane and actually gain an advantage by doing so, the problem would solve itself.

But I don't have much hope for that, either.  Even I have to force myself not to take an opening before the merge point when a good one presents itself because it seems right, but I know it's not so I make myself keep going to the end.

[Katy M]

Do you think there might be a difference whether merging early or zipper early, depending on how much traffic there is?  I'm asking this seriously.  I can understand how zipper merging would be more efficient in heavy traffic.  New York City, LA, Boston, other places.  But, when you live in a rural area, for example, I live in Vermont, and there's not that much traffic and traffic is very light a mile out from the merging area, and only has about 5 or 6 cars slowing up towards the merging point, wouldn't it just be better to get in behind the 5th car instead of driving past those 5 cars. We're not talking major traffic jam here.  Not even close.

[MonicaM]

On 4/14/2018 at 12:03 PM, Blergh said:

OK, I don't know how commonplace a pet peeve this is but here goes: I hate it when I do something I know I'd be furious at another person having done to me- as the other day when I cut in front of someone else to get a parking place. Yep, too bad that THAT had to be their first impression of me thanks to my lack of patience.

This reminds me of something that happened years ago.  I was picking up my sons at school, and pulled into the first parking spot I saw.  I still don't know if I cut in front of her or not, I certainly didn't mean to, but another mom definitely thought I did, and she gave me one of those killer looks, and then glared at me the entire time we were waiting for our kids.  For the rest of the school year, any time she saw me she gave me looks that were filled with obvious hatred.  

A couple of years later, one of my sons and one of her sons started playing soccer on a traveling team, and at every game she deliberately avoided me and made every effort to make sure I noticed she wasn't speaking to me.  Our sons played soccer together all the way through high school, and she never once spoke to me or put herself in a position where I might be able to speak with her.  

Talk about making a bad first impression!!  Apparently I committed an unpardonable sin in her eyes and she wanted to make me pay indefinitely.  At first I was extremely uncomfortable with the situation, but with time it became laughable.  

I guess one of her pet peeves was having someone take a parking spot you believed was yours.  Have to say that one of my pet peeves is people who never get over what they decide is a crime against them.  

[Blergh]

Monica M,

Look at the bright side: you only had to deal with her picking up your kids in school and having your kids on the same team as hers. Imagine having to BE one of her kids or family members. Let's just say I wouldn't be surprised if life with her was about as fun as a barrel of dead monkeys  .  You may have saved yourself from years of walking on eggshells.

 

 All the above said in both our posts, I still wish I had not cut in front of that person a few days ago. Oh well.

[Stenbeck]

My pet peeve is taking children and/or pets to inappropriate places:

Unless the kids are in the wedding party, as in the flower girl or the ring bearer, DO NOT take them to the wedding. The kids end up crying or running all over the place, interrupting the older guests and half asleep on a row of chairs by 11 am. Wedding invites go out with plenty of time ---find a babysitter.

Same goes for pets. It's not necessary to take your dog to your doctor's appointment...or to your yoga class. 

[Sun-Bun]

4 hours ago, Stenbeck said:

 

My pet peeve is taking children and/or pets to inappropriate places

 

Yes indeed!!! Although bringing pets to inappropriate places doesn’t really bother me as much, mostly because I adore animals and usually find them quieter/better behaved than children.

Speaking of the children thing, I agree that they should never be at weddings unless they’re the flower girl/ring bearer—-sorry, but they ruin most weddings in my book. They’re typically loud at the ceremony and annoying AF at the reception(we drunk adults on the dance floor trip over them, they take up seats/don’t know how much food to appropriately serve themselves/request stupid shit for the DJ to play). I’m starting to see “adults only/no children allowed” on wedding invites now and I love it, although it pains me that it’s gotten to the point that couples have to resort to this now. 

Hell, it pains me period that it’s gotten to the point that I can’t even enjoy a 5-star meal at a high-end restaurant, or drink at a bar or a brewery/winery without dodging annoying little bratlings running around being loud while their parents and me are getting our drink on. Sorry, but kids running around ruins my buzz—-I dunno how any parent finds drinking out on the town around his/her kids remotely relaxing, but to each his peach I guess...do we Childfree adults have no more safe spaces anymore?! Seriously though, I joke to my husband that even the stripclub isn’t safe for us at this point and they’ll offer playgrounds and children’s menus soon enough at titty bars.

[Quof]

Preach it.  I don't go to McDonalds and expect to play in the ball pit.   Keep your crotch droppings out of nice restaurants.   And the theatre.

[Katy M]

32 minutes ago, Sun-Bun said:

Hell, it pains me period that it’s gotten to the point that I can’t even enjoy a 5-star meal at a high-end restaurant, or drink at a bar or a brewery/winery without dodging annoying little bratlings running around being loud while their parents and me are getting our drink on. Sorry, but kids running around ruins my buzz—-I dunno how any parent finds drinking out on the town around his/her kids remotely relaxing, but to each his peach I guess...do we Childfree adults have no more safe spaces anymore?! Seriously though, I joke to my husband that even the stripclub isn’t safe for us at this point and they’ll offer playgrounds and children’s menus soon enough at titty bars.

I don't have kids, but I really don't understand bringing them to bars.  I also don't understand having them around if you want to drink.  I'm not necessarily talking about one drink of wine or beer with dinner, but having a few drinks witht he friends.  Seems like drinking would be an adults only activity.  Other than that, kids don't bug me in public unless they're being truly egregious.

[Sun-Bun]

15 minutes ago, Katy M said:

I don't have kids, but I really don't understand bringing them to bars.  I also don't understand having them around if you want to drink.

It’s truly an epidemic—-parents these days have gotten so weirdly entitled that they’d probably drag a kid to a swingers club if it were allowed. I honestly think it’s just an issue of cheapness over getting sitters/inability to plan ahead that leads to this situation, but also an issue of these weirdos just not giving a shit about decorum anymore.

Like I was just at a beach bar recently and some mom came in and said absolutely nothing when her kid plopped himself right up at the bar; it took the bartender saying something to her several times and a patron jokingly yelling, “Get this guy a beer!!!” before his braindead excuse of a mom removed him from the bar; it truly scares me that these are the types of people reproducing nowadays.

My sister-in-law had a wedding last year and the invite specifically stated “adults only wedding”—-wouldn’t you know it, a couple of her trashy invitees *still* dragged their rambunctious toddler there. She’s still pissed off about it and I almost don’t blame her.

8 hours ago, MonicaM said:

Talk about making a bad first impression!!  Apparently I committed an unpardonable sin in her eyes and she wanted to make me pay indefinitely.  At first I was extremely uncomfortable with the situation, but with time it became laughable.  

Speaking of unpardonable sins, hahah!!! That would’ve been fun if you’d finally turned to her years later and said, “I’m so sorry, but I get the vibe that we got off on the wrong foot; how about we start over?” Just imagining her stuttering, flummoxed reaction to that would be comedy gold; some people just live to get eternally butthurt over the stupidest shit.

[DeLurker]

7 hours ago, Stenbeck said:

My pet peeve is taking children and/or pets to inappropriate places:

Unless the kids are in the wedding party, as in the flower girl or the ring bearer, DO NOT take them to the wedding. The kids end up crying or running all over the place, interrupting the older guests and half asleep on a row of chairs by 11 am. Wedding invites go out with plenty of time ---find a babysitter.

Same goes for pets. It's not necessary to take your dog to your doctor's appointment...or to your yoga class. 

I'll object on weddings.  If it is a relative's wedding  and the bride and groom invite the family, kids are part of the package.  If the bride and groom do not want children there, that's a different thing and their wishes should be respected.

Children at weddings can be a contentious issue between the bride and groom.  My former SIL did not want my nieces and nephews at her wedding, but she did want to include the children of similar age from her side of the family (not part of the wedding party).  This was not revealed until literally days before the wedding when one brother and his family (including a 1 month old) flew back from Japan just to be at the wedding and another SIL had made beautiful dresses for her daughters to wear.

The wedding was on the verge of being cancelled because my brother (the groom) wanted his nieces and nephews there.  Lots of tears and arguments until the bride finally blamed it on cost.  That night I went to my brother's, gave him a check for $750 - surely enough to cover the cost of 5 children - and told him he should buy himself a ticket to go to NH  (where we have family) instead of going to the wedding.  I was dead serious too.  Over the years he's often said he should have gone to NH instead of the wedding.

The reception wasn't held at a fancy place - something like the local VA hall.

 

On 4/14/2018 at 12:03 PM, Blergh said:

OK, I don't know how commonplace a pet peeve this is but here goes: I hate it when I do something I know I'd be furious at another person having done to me- as the other day when I cut in front of someone else to get a parking place. Yep, too bad that THAT had to be their first impression of me thanks to my lack of patience.

I get it.  The worst was when I was dating someone who was very similar in personality to me.  In a lot of ways, that made for a very easy relationship, but when we noticed something in the other person that bugged, it was made worse because it was most likely a habit we shared and we were aware of it.

[Quof]

Quote

If it is a relative's wedding  and the bride and groom invite the family, kids are part of the package

The invitation lists who IS invited, not who isn't.   Writing "no children" is tacky, because, unless their names are on the invitation, they aren't invited in the first place and anyone with simple reading skills should understand that. That's why you never write "and family" - does that include Grandma?  2nd cousin? 

Inviting children should be like inviting adults - there are some you like, and some you don't, and you don't have to invite them all.   

I used to socialize in a group of couples, with family status ranging from no kids to grown kids.  One couple with an only child hosted most often because it was easiest for them.   When others hosted, they sometimes brought him along starting at about age 5.  They would bring something to keep him occupied, like a video game and a movie to use in another room, and he had often eaten before arriving. He just didn't want to stay home with a sitter, and we barely knew he was there.   Once they asked "Do you mind if we bring Billy?" and I responded "Don't you realize we only invite you because he can't drive himself?  He's our favourite member of the family. Once he's 16, you guys are off the list." Other friends might have been told "Sorry, it's not an appropriate event for your (demon spawn) children."

[KittyMom4]

3 hours ago, Sun-Bun said:

Hell, it pains me period that it’s gotten to the point that I can’t even enjoy a 5-star meal at a high-end restaurant, or drink at a bar or a brewery/winery without dodging annoying little bratlings running around being loud while their parents and me are getting our drink on. Sorry, but kids running around ruins my buzz—-I dunno how any parent finds drinking out on the town around his/her kids remotely relaxing, but to each his peach I guess...do we Childfree adults have no more safe spaces anymore?! Seriously though, I joke to my husband that even the stripclub isn’t safe for us at this point and they’ll offer playgrounds and children’s menus soon enough at titty bars.

Every year my boyfriend and I attend a food and wine fest in the 1,000 Islands, it is always extremely crowded, and it's full of WINE vendors, with a few specialty food vendors. Every year there are parents shoving huge strollers through the crowd and parking in front of booths blocking 2-3 spaces from people looking to sample. I wish the facility would ban any child under the age of 12 from attending and absolutely deny anyone with a stroller! Is it really that hard to find a babysitter for a couple hours on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon? 

[GHScorpiosRule]

Wow.

I know in my years of attending weddings (all were Indian), guest brought their babies and children--who behaved properly and didn't cause any problems. Maybe it's the kind of wedding it was? I don't know. Kids played with each other afterward; and even during the reception, some of the kids would dance for the bride and groom--these would be dances to the current popular Bollywood songs/music.

I've even attended some American weddings and didn't have this issue. Maybe I was just lucky?

[auntlada]

We've taken our son to several weddings and funerals. The only time he ran around was at the wedding reception that had a play area for kids, and even then, one of us was with him at all times because he was only about 3 or so. He is 6' and he does not run wildly, he doesn't make lots of noise during the ceremony or service, and he behaves better than some adults I've seen.

We don't take him to fancy and expensive restaurants. We don't eat there either because we can't afford to. We have a child. But we do eat at restaurants, and he has not once run around in the restaurant. He colors, he reads books, we talk.

Not all children behave badly, and most wouldn't if they had parents who took their jobs seriously and parented rather than trying to be their kids' friends.

That actually makes me think of a peeve I've had for some time. At my son's school, they talk about "our friends" or "Mrs. Teacher's friends" when they are talking about the students. It bugs the crap out of me. The children are not the teachers' or staff's friends. They are students. Someday when they have graduated, they can be friends. For now, it isn't a friendship situation and shouldn't be.