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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


Message added by Mod-Tigerkatze,

Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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13 minutes ago, Maharincess said:

I'm sure I've bitched about this before as it's become my yearly spring/summer peeve.  Why is it that its impossible to find a womans flat slide type sandal that isn't the thong style?!  I can't wear the thing type sandals because the part that goes between the toes annoys the hell out of me.  Even as a kid I wouldn't wear them.   My preferred style is the toe loop but they're impossible to find. I found some on the Target website but I hate buying shoes online because every brand is sized differently.   Dont shoe makers understand that not all women like thing sandals?  Thats all I can find.  Any flat slide sandal has the damn strap between the toes. 

I have the same problem, can't walk in thongs and need comfortable shoes since I broke my foot a few years ago.   The only thing I can find is Aerosoles and they're not the best quality.

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I'm an old hippie chick and I even have tie dye maxi dresses hanging in my closet but I just can't do Birkenstock.  The sandals I found at the Target site are only $15.99 so I think I'll just order a couple pairs of those and hope for the best.  I normally wear a 7.5 so I think I'll order one in that size and a size 8 in case they run small.   If one of them doesn't fit, I'll give them to my daughter.  They're really cute so I hope they fit.  Have any of you ever tried Mossimo sandals from Target?  I'm just wondering if they're true to size. 

Thank you @partofme and @ABay for the suggestions. 

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Doctors should go a little ways down the list of side effects.

I got a shot today.  Doctor explains that the shot might make my arm sore so I should move it around a lot.

Let's just say that this afternoon I had no sore arm but I did have moment of clarity where I realized my mood was all out of proportion to things going on.  So I hit google and other symptoms include mild drowsiness, mild fussiness, and mild crying.  Considering my full blown meltdown at what is, for me, a normal amount of stress  I would like to quibble with the word mild.

Now that I know I'm not crazy, I'm no longer acting crazy,

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7 hours ago, MrsMoltisanti said:

Okay here is my pet peeve, been bothering me for years - I have a friend for decades and she has a habit of reaching over and spearing her fork in your food in a restaurant and trying your food.  She did it through high school and college and now we are middle aged and at a high school get together recently she reached over as soon as the waiter put my food down and she speared some of my poutine.

She's been doing this since high school? So what, about 20-30 years or so? And you've never said anything? Why would you expect her to stop now?

I have two dear friends from the museum I belong to back on Long Island, and we'll have lunch or dinner together when I'm back home.  If he or I are having something with fries, she will usually swipe a few off one of our plates, but it's something we just joke about.  One time when it happened, he related a story about a lunch he had with former NY governor George Pataki (my friend knows *everybody*).  They are at a local diner, my friend orders a sandwich with fries, and Pataki reached over and swiped a few off his plate.

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More bad behavior in the grocery store.

A guy knocks over a container of cookies in the bakery.  The cookies spill on the floor. 

I watch to see what he'll do because I instinctively know that people just lose any common sense or decency when they enter the grocery store.

He picks the cookies up off the floor, reseals the container and puts them back.  Who does that?  Do you know how many people with all kinds of crap (probably literally) have walked that floor?

So as he walks away, I grab them and give them to the clerk and explain what "that guy" did.

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46 minutes ago, ParadoxLost said:

Doctors should go a little ways down the list of side effects.

I got a shot today.  Doctor explains that the shot might make my arm sore so I should move it around a lot.

Let's just say that this afternoon I had no sore arm but I did have moment of clarity where I realized my mood was all out of proportion to things going on.  So I hit google and other symptoms include mild drowsiness, mild fussiness, and mild crying.  Considering my full blown meltdown at what is, for me, a normal amount of stress  I would like to quibble with the word mild.

Now that I know I'm not crazy, I'm no longer acting crazy,

The person who gave you the shot was supposed to give you a handout from the CDC (if you're in the US) about possible side efffects. Doctors can't say every possible side effect verbally. Most of them never happen, but if you hear "and possibly death" for every vaccine or medication, people would never get anything 

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1 hour ago, ParadoxLost said:

So I hit google and other symptoms include mild drowsiness, mild fussiness, and mild crying.

This made me laugh because it sounds like symptoms of being an infant.

36 minutes ago, ParadoxLost said:

More bad behavior in the grocery store.

A guy knocks over a container of cookies in the bakery.  The cookies spill on the floor. 

I watch to see what he'll do because I instinctively know that people just lose any common sense or decency when they enter the grocery store.

He picks the cookies up off the floor, reseals the container and puts them back.  Who does that?  Do you know how many people with all kinds of crap (probably literally) have walked that floor?

WHAT!!?! Who does that, indeed!!

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Thank god you saw him. Seriously, people are morons.  I thought of you guys yesterday when I was at Rite Aid. A new register opened up and I was next in line. The clerk looked right at me and said next in line over here and of course the guy behind me jumped in. She rolled her eyes and looked at me. I was so amused thinking about the conversations here about line jumpers that I just nodded to her to go ahead.  Plus it was early in the morning and I wasn't awake enough to get into an argument. When I got to the register she thanked me.  But there is karma. When I went outside he was standing there picking up his purchases because the bag had broken. 

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4 hours ago, Maharincess said:

I'm sure I've bitched about this before as it's become my yearly spring/summer peeve.  Why is it that its impossible to find a womans flat slide type sandal that isn't the thong style?!  I can't wear the thing type sandals because the part that goes between the toes annoys the hell out of me.  Even as a kid I wouldn't wear them.   My preferred style is the toe loop but they're impossible to find. I found some on the Target website but I hate buying shoes online because every brand is sized differently.   Dont shoe makers understand that not all women like thing sandals?  Thats all I can find.  Any flat slide sandal has the damn strap between the toes. 

Try huaraches sandals.  There are many different styles.  I don't like anything separating my toes, so I wear the style that has the straps over all of them, then wraps around the back.

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4 hours ago, Moose135 said:

She's been doing this since high school? So what, about 20-30 years or so? And you've never said anything? Why would you expect her to stop now?

I agree. She's been doing it for 20 years and nobody has said anything so she thinks it's ok.  Thats why she keeps doing it.  My daughter always asks me why her mother in law snoops through their house, rearranges things and eats food thats obviously been hidden. I tell her its because she's been doing it for ten years and nobody calls her on it!  I tell her that instead of bitching to me about it, she needs to talk to her mother in law. 

Thanks @Hanahope   I have some issues and can't really bend over very well so I need slides that I can just slip my feet into so back straps don't work for me.  I also like the toe loop. While I hate having the thong sandal between my toes, I like the toe loop. I can never get other kinds to stay on my feet.   I just went ahead and ordered 3 pairs of the ones from Target, a black, brown and a multi colored pair. They're cute and they were really cheap so I went ahead. If they dont fit, I'll give them away and try again. 

Edited by Maharincess
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4 hours ago, AuntieL said:

Thank god you saw him. Seriously, people are morons.  I thought of you guys yesterday when I was at Rite Aid. A new register opened up and I was next in line. The clerk looked right at me and said next in line over here and of course the guy behind me jumped in. She rolled her eyes and looked at me. I was so amused thinking about the conversations here about line jumpers that I just nodded to her to go ahead.  Plus it was early in the morning and I wasn't awake enough to get into an argument. When I got to the register she thanked me.  But there is karma. When I went outside he was standing there picking up his purchases because the bag had broken. 

I like to think that the cashier of special bags for customers like him.  Bags that aren't ripped yet, but if you pack the groceries just right, will split open once the customer takes ten steps out of the store.

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10 hours ago, AuntieL said:

Thank god you saw him. Seriously, people are morons.  I thought of you guys yesterday when I was at Rite Aid. A new register opened up and I was next in line. The clerk looked right at me and said next in line over here and of course the guy behind me jumped in. She rolled her eyes and looked at me. I was so amused thinking about the conversations here about line jumpers that I just nodded to her to go ahead.  Plus it was early in the morning and I wasn't awake enough to get into an argument. When I got to the register she thanked me.  But there is karma. When I went outside he was standing there picking up his purchases because the bag had broken. 

big ole snort giggle :-)

5 hours ago, backformore said:

I like to think that the cashier of special bags for customers like him.  Bags that aren't ripped yet, but if you pack the groceries just right, will split open once the customer takes ten steps out of the store.

Heeee.

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9 hours ago, Maharincess said:

Thanks @Hanahope   I have some issues and can't really bend over very well so I need slides that I can just slip my feet into so back straps don't work for me.  I also like the toe loop. While I hate having the thong sandal between my toes, I like the toe loop. I can never get other kinds to stay on my feet.   I just went ahead and ordered 3 pairs of the ones from Target, a black, brown and a multi colored pair. They're cute and they were really cheap so I went ahead. If they dont fit, I'll give them away and try again. 

Many huaraches don't have staps with buckles, its just some leather straps that are in the back, but the foot slides right in.  They're like a typical ballet flat, just made with leather straps that allow air inbetween them.  

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You can find them in lots of different colors, where the leather is painted, and other styles, but these are the basic.

Sometimes, it takes a bit to 'break them in', like anything with leather, but they get to be so so comfortable.  They are totally my 'go to' sandle for summer.

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She's been doing this since high school? So what, about 20-30 years or so? And you've never said anything? Why would you expect her to stop now?

I agree. She's been doing it for 20 years and nobody has said anything so she thinks it's ok.  Thats why she keeps doing it.  My daughter always asks me why her mother in law snoops through their house, rearranges things and eats food thats obviously been hidden. I tell her its because she's been doing it for ten years and nobody calls her on it!  I tell her that instead of bitching to me about it, she needs to talk to her mother in law. 

Oh I did tell her about it back in the day - as I also did in this recent episode of her grabbing food that I mentioned in my original post.  I stopped her dead and said would you like me to put some on a plate for you, as opposed to helping herself. I wasn't going to lecture her on the scene in front of all our old friends at a reunion.

 I haven't seen her really in more than 25 years since high school and I guess I was just venting on the "pet peeve" board that I cannot get over people who do not grow up and get this concept.  

I have a feeling that people have called her on it as well but she just thinks we have the problem not wanting to share.

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3 hours ago, MrsMoltisanti said:

Oh I did tell her about it back in the day - as I also did in this recent episode of her grabbing food that I mentioned in my original post.  I stopped her dead and said would you like me to put some on a plate for you, as opposed to helping herself. I wasn't going to lecture her on the scene in front of all our old friends at a reunion.

 I haven't seen her really in more than 25 years since high school and I guess I was just venting on the "pet peeve" board that I cannot get over people who do not grow up and get this concept.  

I have a feeling that people have called her on it as well but she just thinks we have the problem not wanting to share.

I went to dinner with a group of 4 women friends some years ago .  I noticed that they had my favorite dessert - chocolate decadence cake (a flourless cake made by Harry & David) .  I ordered it after dinner, and my one friend asked for a taste of my dessert, and suggested that I pass it around the table so "everyone gets a taste."   I said no, I had been looking forward to this dessert, and didn't want to settle for just getting a bite.  She criticized me for being "selfish" because I didn't want to share.  I was floored - is it required that you "share"  dessert?  I asked the waiter to bring another one, and she didn't like that solution, again insisting I "share".  I passed the original dessert to her, and had the second one to myself.  Of course, I felt like a glutton, like the idea of having an ENTIRE individual portion of cake was so outrageous. 

The thing is, I often order a dessert to split when I'm having dinner with one other person.   But not 4 people!   If you want dessert, ask if I want to split it when we order, or order your own.   don't get between me and chocolate.

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13 minutes ago, backformore said:

I was floored - is it required that you "share"  dessert?

Oh my goodness!  You were put into a bad spot by simply ordering your own treat!  It kind of makes the whole friends dinner turn sour, doesn't it?  I feel for you.  Having an entire piece to yourself and feeling bad about it because of your friend's demand is certainly not good at all.  I wouldn't want to go out with these friends again for sure. 

I dated a guy once for about almost a year we would have been mid forties - and when we went out we would order nice drinks for example a large decorative margarita - I wanted to savour mine and he would usually drink his down and then want to taste mine too.  Not once but maybe twice or more.  It would give me the heebie jeebies because instantly the date which was otherwise going well would turn me off.  I started to drink my drink faster just on principle alone so he couldn't ask for some.  That relationship lasted less than a year when he dumped me at midnight on New Years Eve over email (he lived in another city and we couldn't spend that holiday together) 

Jeez eh! 

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13 minutes ago, backformore said:

I said no, I had been looking forward to this dessert, and didn't want to settle for just getting a bite.  She criticized me for being "selfish" because I didn't want to share.  I was floored - is it required that you "share"  dessert? 

Okay, your friend was WAY out of line. I assume I'm not telling you anything you don't already know.

It sounds like she's got an entire thing in her head that a person shouldn't eat a whole restaurant dessert. So if only one person wants dessert, that person would obviously want to split it.  And that idea is so deep that she freaking jumped on your desire to eat yummy chocolate cake as an opportunity for everybody to get a bite so nobody feels guilty. And you pooped on that plan.

I'm funny in that I'll bend over backwards to make sure everybody is okay. Put up with years of BS where I put everybody else's needs in front of mine. But I would have shot down that "Let's all share your dessert" so hard it wouldn't have left an opportunity for further discussion.  Perhaps it's my normal extremely accommodating personality that makes it work when I blurt out a "Get your own damn dessert!"

 

4 minutes ago, MrsMoltisanti said:

I wanted to savour mine and he would usually drink his down and then want to taste mine too. 

Ew. On a related note, I was on a date Friday night. We ordered the same sandwich, she got the salad I got the fries.  I didn't eat all of my fries, nor did I want to eat all of them. They were great, nice and salty, but more than I wanted. As the conversation flowed, my fries somehow got eaten. It was cute. These stories reminded me of that.

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Concur re attempts at 'sharing' food one has ordered and paid for! I once knew someone who asked me to sample an uneaten portion from a total stranger's plate from an adjoining table. Nope!

 I also had a onetime acquaintance who couldn't stand it if I actually took the time to read something while we were eating together and would make a point to try to poke their fingers on my reading material then go on a rant re whatever topic they happened to poke on. It got so that I started to read as much as I could before the meal  and offering to let them read the news after I had finished it. This person wasn't interested in either option. Oh, and they couldn't understand why I should have any objections to their writing graffiti to deface my reading material! ARGH!!

 

 Let's just say that this didn't acquaintanceship didn't last for very long and the above was but one reason I was not sorry to have it end.

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3 hours ago, backformore said:

The thing is, I often order a dessert to split when I'm having dinner with one other person.   But not 4 people!   If you want dessert, ask if I want to split it when we order, or order your own.   don't get between me and chocolate.

Yes.  If you want to split deserts you arrange it when ordering.  If its decided after ordering its because the person that ordered offered and not that the person who didn't asked.

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15 minutes ago, ParadoxLost said:

Yes.  If you want to split deserts you arrange it when ordering.  If its decided after ordering its because the person that ordered offered and not that the person who didn't asked.

My niece used to do that sort of thing -- decide that she would share your brownie. She was 2 years old, though, and no longer does it now that she's about to graduate from college.

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20 hours ago, Maharincess said:

Thanks @Hanahope   I have some issues and can't really bend over very well so I need slides that I can just slip my feet into so back straps don't work for me.  I also like the toe loop. While I hate having the thong sandal between my toes, I like the toe loop. I can never get other kinds to stay on my feet.   I just went ahead and ordered 3 pairs of the ones from Target, a black, brown and a multi colored pair. They're cute and they were really cheap so I went ahead. If they dont fit, I'll give them away and try again. 

I have had a few pairs of Mia sandals in my adult life. They last forever, and I've always ended up donating them when I get tired of the style or whatever. They have toe-loop styles and slides. Look on other retail sites for discontinued styles (not on the Mia site), sales, etc.

I can't wear fun shoes anymore, thanks to that horrible sprain two years ago. I need really supportive soles. I miss wedges. Yay, aging.

Edited by bilgistic
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3 hours ago, Quof said:

"Joey doesn't share food!!!!!!"

In my house we'll turn into gollum  and hiss "my precious!".  And follow up with "stupid fat hobbit".

we're pretty good at sharing but can't resist an opportunity to quote gollum.

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5 hours ago, Blergh said:

It got so that I started to read as much as I could before the meal  and offering to let them read the news after I had finished it. 

Absolutely! I used to work night shift, and would sometimes go down in the morning for a paper before we got off shift. Everyone seemed to think it was OK to want to grab whichever bits I wasn't reading, and would get a little miffed when I told them it was my paper, I'd paid for it, and I didn't think it was unreasonable to want to read it first. So you can either wait until I'm done (I read very quickly), at which point you can have the damned thing (except for the crossword puzzle), or you can waltz down and get your own, like I just did.

Edited by riley702
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4 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I can't wear fun shoes anymore, thanks to that horrible sprain two years ago. I need really supportive soles. I miss wedges. Yay, aging

I hear you.   Plantar fasciitis means that I need shoes with cushioning and arch support.   A perfectly flat sandal, if I wore it all day, would mean at least a week of severe pain afterwards. 

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@Hanahope, thanks. Those just are not my style at all. I ordered a few pair that should be here at the end of the week. hopefully they'll fit. 

It is so wrong to call somebody selfish because they want to eat their own dessert.  You're nice than I am because I wouldn't have ordered a second one, I would have eaten mine all by myself. 

I need a totally flat shoe or my pain gets a lot worse. Barefoot is best for me but I can't go barefoot out in public. Even a tiny heel throws my hips out of whack and it hurts so bad.  

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2 hours ago, backformore said:

I hear you.   Plantar fasciitis means that I need shoes with cushioning and arch support.   A perfectly flat sandal, if I wore it all day, would mean at least a week of severe pain afterwards. 

Plantar fasciitis: total suckfest. Get better soon!

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It is so wrong to call somebody selfish because they want to eat their own dessert

If they don't get it then I would just order that dessert to go and enjoy it at home.  Sometimes people have brick heads.  No matter what you say you will be in the wrong. 

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22 hours ago, backformore said:

She criticized me for being "selfish" because I didn't want to share.  I was floored - is it required that you "share"  dessert? 

This reminds me of a comic routine I once heard. We teach children to share, but adults don't share. We insist our kids share their toys, but would you share your Corvette with the neighbors? Hell no.  :)

Today's pet peeve: people who do not stop at STOP signs. I see it more and more. It doesn't say "don't even slow down, just look both ways and keep going."

14 hours ago, bilgistic said:

On another site, I just saw an ad for a theme park's HALLOWEEN festivities, which start September 15! When did the "Christmas creep" of Halloween start?? Who approved this?? It's April!!!!!

Well, if any holiday were allowed to creep, it'd be Halloween.  

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19 hours ago, bilgistic said:

I have had a few pairs of Mia sandals in my adult life. They last forever, and I've always ended up donating them when I get tired of the style or whatever. They have toe-loop styles and slides. Look on other retail sites for discontinued styles (not on the Mia site), sales, etc.

I can't wear fun shoes anymore, thanks to that horrible sprain two years ago. I need really supportive soles. I miss wedges. Yay, aging.

I had a mia wedge years ago in beige with a beige sole with contrast stiching. It was about 4.5 inches and extremely comfy.  

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My pet peeve of the day: I should probably stay away from the posts on nextdoor regarding pets, but I see them sometimes as I scroll through looking for things I might want to otherwise know about my neighborhood. Sometimes people post about needing to rehome their pets because, you know, life happens and sometimes situations change. Inevitably, though, someone will rush in to shame these people, and it really, really irks me. Right now, there's a lady looking to rehome her elderly cats because her father passed away and she's moving to take care of her mother, who is allergic to cats. It's a sad situation all around, right? Clearly a trying time for her. Why, then, do some people feel like the proper response is to scold her, demand that she find a way to make it work despite the aforementioned hardships, and generally do everything short of literally calling her scum? This is just an example - it happens every single time. It's like, I love cats too, but this in no way entitles me to harangue people who are making a good faith effort to deal with a hard situation by rehoming them.

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I couldn't agree more @afterbite. As if it isn't bad enough for that woman. People can get a little strange about pets; feeling so strongly about the need to protect the animals that can't protect themselves, that they disregard the human factors entirely. 

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Right now, there's a lady looking to rehome her elderly cats because her father passed away and she's moving to take care of her mother, who is allergic to cats. It's a sad situation all around, right? Clearly a trying time for her. Why, then, do some people feel like the proper response is to scold her, demand that she find a way to make it work despite the aforementioned hardships, and generally do everything short of literally calling her scum? This is just an example - it happens every single time. It's like, I love cats too, but this in no way entitles me to harangue people who are making a good faith effort to deal with a hard situation by rehoming them.

After years of working in the animal care profession, I have no tolerance for those passing judgement. I'm so tired of hearing "I would live in my car with my cats if I had to".  I can't download the Nextdoor app due to my neighbor's criminal past (our whole apartment complex is barred), but I see it on FB all the time. Now I reply "So which one of you is going to stop shaming the owner and take in the cats themselves? " Or "Really? You would live in the car with your cats, eh? How would that work when you're on the job? Would you keep the cats confined in a hot vehicle for 8 hrs? Or how about when you're driving and their running amok causing a distraction? And what about their litter box......you would really think you would be able to comfortably live with a litter box in the back seat smelling up your car?" That usually shuts them up.

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22 hours ago, ennui said:

Today's pet peeve: people who do not stop at STOP signs. I see it more and more. It doesn't say "don't even slow down, just look both ways and keep going."

I use the bus to get to Minneapolis, where I work. I have a 3/4 mile walk to work from the bus stop, which involves crossing a couple of major streets and the I-35W southbound off-ramp. None of those people are either looking for or expecting pedestrians. Especially on the I-35W off-ramp, they'll run up on the red light as if they don't need stop. Even when it's green, if they see you in the crosswalk, they might decide to floor it and try to beat you through the crosswalk and, even if they don't do this, they'll creep up on you as if to threaten to run you over unless you get out of their way. I got run over by one of these assholes back on 14 Dec. The dipshit didn't even know I was in the crosswalk until after he'd hit me! And that means he wasn't even looking in the direction he was steering his car and that he didn't pay any attention to anything going on outside his car for the 30 seconds the light was red and he was waiting to make his left turn. I'm still dealing with the fall-out, of course. I don't think my right knee will ever be the same. It's very weak, it's very painful to compress/bend the knee more than a 90 degree angle, and I can't run or jump because of the pain caused by the hard shock of my foot striking the pavement. My orthopedic specialist (who I saw just last week!) thinks it will get better over time. I'm scheduled to see him again in late August at this point. If nothing has changed by then, I'm going to push him to declare this permanent and then I'm going to sue for a better settlement than the $1500 that Progressive (FUCK. I. HATE. THAT. COMPANY.) has offered me so far. No, I haven't accepted their settlement offer.

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My kids are a few years off from driving, but I have begun drumming into their heads that running red lights and stop signs is not only illegal, but just about the most dangerous thing you can do when driving. 

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38 minutes ago, MrSmith said:

If nothing has changed by then, I'm going to push him to declare this permanent and then I'm going to sue for a better settlement than the $1500 that Progressive (FUCK. I. HATE. THAT. COMPANY.) has offered me so far. No, I haven't accepted their settlement offer.

I think you should sue now. It's been four months. Lots of attorneys will offer a free consultation. I'm sure your medical bills must be higher than $1500, and lost wages.

Back in the Dark Ages when I was 17, I received a traffic citation for a "California stop" (not coming to a complete stop, tires not moving). In hindsight, it was a blessing. I come to a complete stop, and I get the added benefit of annoying the people behind me.  :)

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8 minutes ago, JTMacc99 said:

My kids are a few years off from driving, but I have begun drumming into their heads that running red lights and stop signs is not only illegal, but just about the most dangerous thing you can do when driving. 

Absolutely! The sad fact is that you're only saving an incredibly minimal amount of time by running a stop sign or red light. Even in big cities like San Diego where the red light might be 2 minutes long (or more). And a stopping properly at a stop sign won't cost you more than 10 or 15 seconds in most cases.

You should also teach them to stop for yellow lights whenever it's safe to do so. When I was about 15, my dad ran a yellow light (making a left turn) and someone coming the other way ran the yellow light (going straight). They t-boned my dad and basically obliterated the passenger side of the vehicle. I didn't even have my learner's permit at that time, and that accident made enough of an impression on me that - in 29 years of driving - I stop for yellow lights whenever possible.

Another thing that I see people do is they sit at the stop light, waiting for it to turn green, and they pay no attention to anything going on in the world around them! They don't monitor pedestrian and bicycle traffic or even what the guy across the intersection from them is likely to do when the light turns green. It astounds me. There's so much to pay attention to, even when you're sitting at a stop light; I'm constantly looking around, looking for pedestrians approaching the intersection from any direction, bicycle traffic (because those crazy fuckers never obey traffic laws and signals like they're supposed to!), and vehicle traffic (to see whether I can expect any red-light runners, asshats who have to make their left turn in front of me, and so on).

5 minutes ago, ennui said:

I think you should sue now. It's been four months. Lots of attorneys will offer a free consultation. I'm sure your medical bills must be higher than $1500, and lost wages.

Back in the Dark Ages when I was 17, I received a traffic citation for a "California stop" (not coming to a complete stop, tires not moving). In hindsight, it was a blessing. I come to a complete stop, and I get the added benefit of annoying the people behind me.  :)

I think I'll probably have to sue. My medical bills currently stand at $20,247.05. The state of Minnesota requires you to have at least $20k of Personal Injury Protection insurance as part of your car insurance. MN is a "no fault" state, which means that PIP insurance is there for when you get injured in a car accident - even when the other driver is at fault. So, my insurance has paid $20,000 to date, and anything over that will be paid by Progressive. But I have to reach a settlement agreement with them first and then they reimburse me for anything over that $20k. So, it'll be a while and, thankfully, my medical bills should be minimal for the next few months. August will be a good test because we go to Milwaukee for WI State Fair and that's two days of 12 to 14 hours each walking around the fair grounds, gorging ourselves on as much fair food as we can stand. LOL

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1 hour ago, JTMacc99 said:

My kids are a few years off from driving, but I have begun drumming into their heads that running red lights and stop signs is not only illegal, but just about the most dangerous thing you can do when driving. 

Speaking of dangerous things, make sure they understand not to drive around the barrier and try to beat the train. 

My personal favorite? You may outrun the police car, but you can't outrun the radio.

Kids.

Edited by ennui
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Another thing is speeding. I hate it ... and I do it. It feels so psychologically satisfying, and yet you're generally not saving an appreciable amount of time. And if you get a ticket, that's guaranteed to eat up at least four to eight times as much time as you saved speeding - plus, you get to pay for the privilege of getting there a lot later than you expected. There was a time when I worked from home full time and only had to drive to buy groceries once a month. I noticed that it was incredibly easy not to speed during that time, and that the more time you spend driving, the more likely you are to speed. Cruise control helps, but I still end up doing 5 over. Sometimes, I can help myself slow down by reminding myself that 60 miles at 65 mph takes 55m 23.07s, while 60 miles at 70 mph takes 51m 25.71s. So, if the speed limit is 55 mph (and you're traveling 60 miles), is doing 65 mph vs 60 mph worth 4m 37s and the chance for a ticket? Of course, if you're only going 30 miles, you'd only be saving 2m 18s at those speeds.

Edited to add: Here's a perfect example from my real-world commute home. MN 316 from Hastings to the intersection of MN 316 and US Hwy 61. From the edge of Hastings to that intersection, it's 8.5 miles. The speed limit is 55. Travel time at 55 mph: 9m 16s. Travel time at 60 mph: 8m 30s. Why does getting there 45s faster feel like I've just saved 15 minutes?!?

Edited by MrSmith
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@afterbite to add to what you said about people being shamed for not being able to care for their pets, the person had a mom that was allergic!  People minimize allergies to animals, like it's a matter of putting up with a few sneezes, or they say "take a pill.".  A pill? You mean 2, pills a day, every day, forever?

Cat allergies can be serious. If I'm around a cat, my eyes water and my nose runs. Within 30 minutes I can't breathe, from an asthma attack.  I love animals, but I wouldn't want to have to use an asthma inhaler every 4 hours in order to live with a cat.

Traffic pet peeves - now that it's spring, bicyclists are out.  I am always aware and give them extra room. But too many drivers don't like sharing the road, and get way too close.  They need to understand that a pothole or a stone could cause a cyclist to suddenly swerve or lose control. Give them some space!

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28 minutes ago, MrSmith said:

Another thing is speeding. I hate it ... and I do it. It feels so psychologically satisfying, and yet you're generally not saving an appreciable amount of time.

I read somewhere that the posted speed limit is generally about 15 MPH lower than what the engineer rates as an appropriate speed for that road. (Take read somewhere with the grain of salt it deserves.) If that's the case (and I go with 'is the case' because it aligns with my driving world view) then perhaps it feels psychologically satisfying because with time and experience, humans can more or less accurately judge what a safe speed for a given roadway might be and so feel constrained when it is artificially lowered.

3 minutes ago, backformore said:

they say "take a pill.".  A pill? You mean 2, pills a day, every day, forever?

You're right - there were a couple of 'take a pill' replies, along with 'just confine them to 1-2 rooms in the house and have the allergic person avoid those rooms'. So, what I'm hearing here is that someone who already needs someone there as a caregiver (hence, moving in with mom to provide care) should just take a couple of pills or avoid entire areas of her house like it's no big deal? These are not trivial considerations.

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So my latest issue of Entertainment Weekly is a "special double issue" for like the third time in the last couple of months.  What about "WEEKLY" do they not understand?

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Peeve. here's one.

I thought I was having a casual phone conversation. I was asked, "What are you making for dinner?" I said, "I'm making tilapia (fish) , rice and asparagus." He said,"Well, you are not really MAKING the fish." And he went on and on about it. Well dammit. No. I bought it ...raw and cooked it....prepared it. He was born here and speaks English . Is my response so hard to understand?  Jesus. (and this person is not my bf bc my bf is not crazy.)

NO. I did not literally MAKE the effing fish. And I wasn't literally "making" the rice or asparagus either. *snort* It's a phrase. People understand.

Just go ahead and pick apart my words so I don't want to talk on the phone with this person anymore.

Edited by ari333
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2 hours ago, MrSmith said:

. I'm scheduled to see him again in late August at this point. If nothing has changed by then, I'm going to push him to declare this permanent and then I'm going to sue for a better settlement than the $1500 that Progressive (FUCK. I. HATE. THAT. COMPANY.) has offered me so far. No, I haven't accepted their settlement offer.

Only $1500?? Shit, Allstate paid out $1000 for my time, "pain and suffering" when I was rear-ended. All that was for was the time I missed for work to go to the doctor (including my $25 copay reimbursement) and "deal with this"(even though I used vacation time to cover it) and the time I took off work to drop my car off and pick it up from the body shop (even though I just took an extended lunch both times). In addition to the money they paid me, they of course paid to fix my car with brand new parts (because my car is/was just a few months old).

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