Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

[emma675]

HFC, thoughts and prayers to her, not so that she will repair things with the cretin, but that she will be able to see him for who he is and leave him in the dust. Where are she and the children going to live when they come back?

I hope that people are charitable and forgiving, but they make her work for it a little, if that makes sense. I get annoyed with people who turn their backs on their friends and family and then just expect everyone to forgive and take them back immediately with no repercussions. But I'm a Cancer; I'm loyal to a fault, but if you screw me over, watch out, lol! We can hold a grudge.

[zoomama]

there could be another side to this story of daughter giving up contact with her people, HFC. sometimes there are husbands that just blatantly discourage that communication. we have no idea if he has been abusing her or the kids. i can speak with experience here.

she was in a foreign country with her babies and this 'man'.  i am sure she tried everything she could to keep her marriage, even at the expense of her family. as a christian, which i am, we are taught to fight for our marriages.  she probably believes with all her heart that she needs to fix her marriage at all costs, thus her hope of reconciliation. she will need help, support and hope when she comes home, especially when she figures out that her marriage and her life as she knew it is over.  not judgement.

for me, after 10 years of abuse directed at me specifically, it took a single beating to my child to wake me up. we separated IMMEDIATELY per my kicking him out. i second guessed myself for a long time but finally realized that God does not condone evil, abuse or mind games.  again, as a christian, it was a process for me and it will be for her too.

may you be her strength in the storm that coming.  its a tough road....

[Absolom]

Once she gets home and sees the new happy couple together her dreams may die a rapid death.  Thankfully she won't be stuck away from home under his thumb for decades now and soon she can put her life back together and move on.

[crazycatlady58]

Definitely  will send thoughts and prayers  for  protection  and wisdom  for all involved . Hopefully  coming  home to her loving  family  aND having  some separation  from  him will help clear her thoughts . Also hopefully  this last stunt will have the result  of not ever be accepted  by a mission board  again.NOT a good  ambassador  for Christ.

[lookeyloo]

@HappyFatChick- what a mess. The first Mr lookeyloo left me for his nurse in a new town with two small children - it was miserable and took some hard work and lots of tears but I did get over him and was able to make a better life. Your daughter and grands will have you and others to help her make amends and  through the misery. Maybe a few years from now we will be checking in and you will report how great she is doing.  

[Love2dance]

@Happyfatchick, so sorry your daughter is going through this, but so happy she is coming home with her children. Yes, definitely sending healing, strength, and safe thoughts to her and the grands in Nicaragua.

Like ZOOMAMA, I lived for many years with a cheating, abusive spouse. But I am so lucky and happy in my second marriage, and am wishing the same for your daughter.

Thank goodness she has you and your support to come home to.

[zoomama]

2 hours ago, Love2dance said:

 

Like ZOOMAMA, I lived for many years with a cheating, abusive spouse. But I am so lucky and happy in my second marriage, and am wishing the same for your daughter.

Thank goodness she has you and your support to come home to.

yep - the 2nd time around i was WAAAY picky about who i trusted and loved. its been work but the love is there and no evidence of any similarities to the first.

[Minivanessa]

@Happyfatchick, I'm so glad your kid has you for her mamma. Her mamma has her back, and I'm sure she knows it deep down. Sending good wishes for everyone in your family as your daughter navigates the bumpy road ahead. 

[Love2dance]

@Sew Sumi, hope you feel better. (Brought over from your posts on the other threads.)

[Rabbittron]

My son was watching the Powder Puff Girls cartoon and they went to the  Pickle museum and the first thing that I thought was the do nothing but grifting Duggars should go there.

[Happyfatchick]

Ok, I admit it: I have completely stopped reading the other threads.  This is notably sad because I just found out jessa is pg again.  They keep getting me, and I keep getting on the wrong horse.  Dang it.  I truly thought Jessa would be the holdout on pumping out blessings.  And I thought Jill would be pg.  this whole thing is not going the way I thought.  Thankfully, I don't have any money on it.  I know I should have commented on jessa's thread, but I didn't want to sound as stupid or as ill informed as I actually am.

[kathe5133]

I haven't read the other Duggar threads for months!  I just come here and mark the rest "as read"!  But, I did hear Jessa is pregnant again.  It's all over the news.  How sad that some knocked up fundie is news!  I had some hope when many weeks went by and I didn't have to click on "Counting On" to mark it read, but they are back!!!

[zoomama]

my blog for today:  

60 and sassy!

today, i am 60 years old. i am thrilled to reach this day! it is a date i did not think i would see. but i have made it.  usually my birthday is just another day with a card in the morning and phone calls periodically throughout the day. this year i made sure it was different. i had a party celebrating ME on saturday. many of my friends and loved ones were there to share pizza and cupcakes in my honor. i loved it! i decided a long time ago that if i was blessed to turn 60, i would throw a party. i had believed that if i was lucky enough to reach an age that my poor mom did not get to see,  it is my obligation (besides my genealogy searching for her family) to get healthy and enjoy my gift of life that she did not receive. so i did!!

recently we moved into a new house that has changed my view of life. i was miserable in our old house every day. beyond the mental duress that place caused, there were physical consequences to my health.  from day one here, i have breathed better and felt happier than i have in a long while. i am settled in already and enjoying myself daily making it our home.

so turning 60, and living here and being healthy and having people like my husband, family and friends around me that love me has made all the difference to me. let's not forget all the tons of F/B messages and phone calls i have received to as well. it has been a wonderful birthday, one i won't soon forget. maybe dying my hair hot pink was just what i needed to let loose and be happy.

thank you all!!

[Minivanessa]

@zoomama: Happy birthday!! You ROCK!!!

[Love2dance]

Awwwww, @zoomama, what a fantastic post. Happy, happy 60th birthday. Wish we could see your fabulous pink hair (back view maybe?). Celebrate and enjoy!!  ???????

[BitterApple]

Happy Birthday, zoomama! Sending a virtual tater tot cassie and drippy sundae your way!

[lookeyloo]

Happy birthday @zoomama - glad to hear of your celebration and bonding with the new residence!!!

[Happyfatchick]

@zoomama, I'm so so so happy you had a good birthday experience!  GO YOU!!!

[frenchtoast]

Happy Birthday zoomama!! Hope the day was everything you wanted it to be!

[NewDigs]

Happy Birthday @zoomama!

What a great post with so many wonderfully positive thoughts. You're an inspiration.

Wishing you many more!

[CherryMalotte]

And many many more to you Zoomama!

[MargeGunderson]

Zoomama, in the words of Owl (from Winnie the Pooh), HIPY PAPY BTHUTHDTH THUTHDA BTHUTHDY (Owl was wise, but more of a Thinker than a Speller).

[Barb23]

Happy Birthday Zoomama & here's to a wonderful new year for you !!  (Holding up my virtual cupcake in salute.)

[emma675]

Happy birthday, zoomama! Any leftover cupcakes to share? I'm a cupcake fiend!

[MunichNark]

Happy Birthday! You rock, Zoomama! Do what you feel like, don't give a damn about other people's opinions (within reason....), have a cracking time. We only live once. Make the most of it

[zoomama]

you guys know how to make a girl feel loved!

[Jynnan tonnix]

8 hours ago, MargeGunderson said:

Zoomama, in the words of Owl (from Winnie the Pooh), HIPY PAPY BTHUTHDTH THUTHDA BTHUTHDY (Owl was wise, but more of a Thinker than a Speller).

Since I first read Winnie the Pooh some 50 years ago, I can never see the words "Happy Birthday" without reading them that way in my mind :)

[crazycatlady58]

Well I had a security  camera  installed  today.  There is a thingie ( cannot think of  the word at the moment , but will come to me when  I wake  up at 2 am to go to the bathroom  ) on the door  and a motion sender so when someone  opens the door it takes a picture .  Also takes pictures  of  me wondering  around  the house .  I live alone  so today I watched  myself  watch T,V.. Sometimes  I live a sad life.

[pinkie]

I'm glad you did that crazycatlady - I was worried about you! (& hey, I watch the weather channel for no real reason, lol, so that is worse than your viewing, lol)

[zoomama]

13 hours ago, emma675 said:

Happy birthday, zoomama! Any leftover cupcakes to share? I'm a cupcake fiend!

what is funny about this is that my friend made the mini cupcakes and decorated about 100 of them!!! i was handing them out to my new neighbors after everyone left because i can't eat gluten. you could have had a bunch to enjoy!

[Aja]

On 8/29/2016 at 7:46 PM, zoomama said:

my blog for today:  

60 and sassy!

today, i am 60 years old. i am thrilled to reach this day! it is a date i did not think i would see. but i have made it.  usually my birthday is just another day with a card in the morning and phone calls periodically throughout the day. this year i made sure it was different. i had a party celebrating ME on saturday. many of my friends and loved ones were there to share pizza and cupcakes in my honor. i loved it! i decided a long time ago that if i was blessed to turn 60, i would throw a party. i had believed that if i was lucky enough to reach an age that my poor mom did not get to see,  it is my obligation (besides my genealogy searching for her family) to get healthy and enjoy my gift of life that she did not receive. so i did!!

recently we moved into a new house that has changed my view of life. i was miserable in our old house every day. beyond the mental duress that place caused, there were physical consequences to my health.  from day one here, i have breathed better and felt happier than i have in a long while. i am settled in already and enjoying myself daily making it our home.

so turning 60, and living here and being healthy and having people like my husband, family and friends around me that love me has made all the difference to me. let's not forget all the tons of F/B messages and phone calls i have received to as well. it has been a wonderful birthday, one i won't soon forget. maybe dying my hair hot pink was just what i needed to let loose and be happy.

thank you all!!

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY, ZOOMAMA!

This whole post rules. Including and especially the hot pink hair. Much love to you in your awesome season of life! :D

[emma675]

I've got a 3rd round of interviews at the company I've been interviewing with since July on 9/12. This is the first round in person (one was over the phone and the second was online) and it's for 4 hours! I'm nervous and excited. I feel like I've got to do a lot more prep work since this will be face-to-face and I can't have crib notes.

[Love2dance]

24 minutes ago, emma675 said:

I've got a 3rd round of interviews at the company I've been interviewing with since July on 9/12. This is the first round in person (one was over the phone and the second was online) and it's for 4 hours! I'm nervous and excited. I feel like I've got to do a lot more prep work since this will be face-to-face and I can't have crib notes.

Oh my goodness, EMMA675, I have fingers and toes crossed for you. I can't believe the process they are putting you through. Good luck!

[Jellybeans]

Happy birthday zoomama!  And good luck emma.  

I don't say much here but I quit reading the other Duggar threads.  I still keep up with some of you. ;-)  

Hope most of you enjoy your weekend.

[lookeyloo]

Hi @Jellybeans - nice to see you on this Forum!!

[Love2dance]

3 hours ago, Jellybeans said:

Happy birthday zoomama!  And good luck emma.  

I don't say much here but I quit reading the other Duggar threads.  I still keep up with some of you. ;-)  

Hope most of you enjoy your weekend.

Hi JELLYBEANS, hope all is well with you. This thread is also my primary reason for visiting the Duggar forum, and is the only reason I am even a little happy the Duggars are on TV. I would miss everyone if it went away. But curiosity also keeps me watching and checking the other threads, too, I must admit.

Anyone on the gulf coast....you are in my thoughts, and wishing you a safe shelter from the storm.

[crazycatlady58]

Jellybeans ,  glad to here from you I think of you often, wondering  how you are doing.

[Barb23]

Emma - Good luck on the interview.  Wow - 4 hours.  

Small Talk is my favorite thread & I usually start here first to see what's going on with everyone. It is amazing that because of the Duggars we have become a wonderful group of cyber friends. 

[Jellybeans]

9 hours ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Jellybeans ,  glad to here from you I think of you often, wondering  how you are doing.

I am doing ok!  Have a new daschund puppy, his name is Mr. Bates (Downton Abby character) and he is adorable. My older daschie is 11 and she thinks he is a mite annoying. She is having surgery on Tuesday for recurrent mast cell cancer but the vet thinks it will be ok.  

And good morning everyone!

[Happyfatchick]

Happy Saturday, everybody!

my daughter has returned from Nicaragua with all the babies.  (And the Wandering Dingdong, but they went separate ways getting off the plane).  Everything is messed up.  Their whole world is just WRONG.  It is disastrous in epic proportions.  It will take her a full year, I expect, to get her balance and be on her feet again.  But she is a steel magnolia and she will go forward.  She's my girl.

I'm thrilled to have her back on the right continent, and secretly thrilled WD appears to be sliding out of the picture.  My heart is truly full.

p.s.  I was going to submit a pic of the homecoming, but it says my file is too big.  How does one make that happen?

[lookeyloo]

@Jellybeans - baby dog sounds adorable.  hoping dog #1 does fine. 

@Happyfatchick - whoopty do!  So happy to hear this good news. Let the healing begin. 

[Absolom]

He actually went and helped her home?  I'm astounded at that.  I'm very glad she and the kids are back stateside.

[Happyfatchick]

15 minutes ago, Absolom said:

He actually went and helped her home?  I'm astounded at that.  I'm very glad she and the kids are back stateside.

No, he actually went for a visit to try to smooth things over (obviously, that didn't work).  Once he got there, she said you are not leaving me alone down here again.  The next time you go, I will be with you.  The "board" is now fully up on all the shenanigans and rumor has it they will meet this Thursday to disband.   This is me, doing my happyfatchick dance!!!

so there's one grifter off the grid for a minute at least - he'll be back.

Edited September 3, 2016 by Happyfatchick

[NewDigs]

So happy for you and yours, @Happyfatchick! 

What a frigging nightmare you've been living. Esp. with them so far away. What a relief.

But now that she's back with you there will be even less chance of her changing her mind. And even better that the board is clued in. 

Stay strong! But I'm sure there's no problem with that. Maybe it's time for the happiest place on earth?

[crazycatlady58]

Happy ,  I am glad she  and the grandkids  are home. Hopefully Mr. Dingdong stays away.

[Love2dance]

6 hours ago, Happyfatchick said:

my daughter has returned from Nicaragua with all the babies.  (And the Wandering Dingdong, but they went separate ways getting off the plane).  Everything is messed up.  Their whole world is just WRONG.  It is disastrous in epic proportions.  It will take her a full year, I expect, to get her balance and be on her feet again.  But she is a steel magnolia and she will go forward.  She's my girl.

That is the best news I have heard all day! I know her heart is broken, but now she can begin healing and she will be able to start making a new and better life. (I know....been there, done that.) What a relief it must be to have her and the children back. So happy for you.

[Jellybeans]

So happy for you HFC!

[Happyfatchick]

You all are amazing!  Such a warm fuzzy.  

My youngest son (with wife and baby) are moving to Raleigh this week, he starts a new job there Monday.  He dreaded telling me because he thought I'd have a meltdown.  I'm afraid I disappointed him because my reaction was: Raleigh?  That's no big deal.  I can do that once a month no problem.  

Turns out if you have a sour stomach over a kid in Nica, raleigh is a piece-a cake!

[emma675]

HFC, so glad your daughter and the kiddos are safely home! Where are they living for now? I'm guessing not with the dingbat husband?

[Jellybeans]

1 hour ago, emma675 said:

HFC, so glad your daughter and the kiddos are safely home! Where are they living for now? I'm guessing not with the dingbat husband?

when will you be getting your job offer?  :-)