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The Golden Bachelor - General Discussion


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10 minutes ago, boyznkatz said:

I agree, and I wouldn't judge him on that because people grieve differently. However, he shouldn't have lied to the women and said he dated very little. He could have easily said that he dated around, but never found what he was looking for. I wonder if the woman he picked is going to stay with him now, unless he was straight with her behind the scenes.

Do they not vet these people when they sign them? Or did they fully want and expect this?

He might have said he dated around (and have told them some of what has come out) and TPTB said that didn't fit their narrative. So it changed to dating very little. Maybe they didn't have that many men who applied? Maybe he was the best looking of the bunch? And maybe some of the guys had several divorces under their belts? Who knows. But we all know that so much is scripted and producer driven. 

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14 hours ago, Kiss my mutt said:

I figured something like this would come out. Nobody is that perfect, but lying about it? You know it’s going to come out and you’ll end up looking worse.

It’s so disappointing! I’m hesitant to tell my husband. He really likes this show and is going to be crushed!!!! 😉

Same here!  This is the first Bachelor show my husband has watched with me. Now I will probably never get him to watch again.

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I always doubted him from  the beginning with the way his wife died suddenly after moving to their dream  home and this Hollywood reporter story backs  it all up.

It's funny so many older women watching this show still fell for his  fake persona when it was so obvious with the constant crying, no man especially of that generation cries that much unless they're pouring it on to manipuate.

 

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I don't understand what all the fuss is about. It's not surprising that Gerry had other relationships after his wife's passing, it's been years and also people seek comfort in their own ways. And it's not surprising that production would try to paint Gerry's dating history in a different light for maximum sympathy and to build the story around finding love again after such a loss. At the end of the day, he wasn't in love with those other women enough to want to permanently settle down with. And just because he's older doesn't mean he - or even the women that were on the show for him - weren't enticed by the limelight. 

I don't find this article scandalous nor do I think it changes much. It's reality tv. And everyone has a past. 

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1 hour ago, Realitystarr said:

I always doubted him from  the beginning with the way his wife died suddenly after moving to their dream  home and this Hollywood reporter story backs  it all up.

It's funny so many older women watching this show still fell for his  fake persona when it was so obvious with the constant crying, no man especially of that generation cries that much unless they're pouring it on to manipuate.

 

I agree.  He's exactly my husband's age and I've only seen my husband cry (that is tear up for a second) over a death in the family. 

There are  many small things that  only someone of his generation would see.  The pictures of young Gerry show a slightly nerdy looking guy who is very out of style for the times. 

His romantic story in People, when the show first began, says he was interested in Toni's friend, but when he realized he didn't have a chance with the friend he turned to Toni who was "a nice little gal." 

Somewhere over the years Gerry got a little more confidence and a little better looking compared to his peers, and I think he started believing he was all that and could now get the beautiful ones.

All this makes me wonder just how hard a time the show might have had with casting this age group.  They had to throw out all the fat bald guys, ones with bad knees who couldn't do the 'dates.' They may have had very few applicants because the attractive men I know in this age group would think doing this show would be beneath them.  It's just not that manly to stand around in a suit holding roses, what would their buddies say?

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On 11/11/2023 at 3:51 AM, Irlandesa said:

April was 16, (maybe younger?) when she got involved with him. He was 40.  I don't think she's the person whose judgment I'm questioning. 

I don't love her, but I don't blame her for being groomed by an older, successful man.

The next season of younger Bachelor is almost finished.  I will be curious to see if they greenlight a Golden Bachelorette edition given the popularity of this show and with scripted shows coming back.

They have been high, but 8 episodes has always been the plan.  You better believe they probably wish they had done 2 hours, like they do the regular Bachelor, and for more episodes. 

In general, Joan left too soon to be chosen.  Even Ellen left too soon but it has happened before.  It's not that they couldn't break patterns but I suspect they'll choose one of the final 3.

https://nypost.com/2015/08/23/frankie-valli-took-me-at-16-and-used-me-in-decades-long-affair/?utm_campaign=iphone_nyp&utm_source=pasteboard_app
 

He used her horribly, but apparently it went on for decades. Sad. Seems like she gave up a lot for him in hopes he would choose her. 

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6 minutes ago, JudyObscure said:

I agree.  He's exactly my husband's age and I've only seen my husband cry (that is tear up for a second) over a death in the family. 

 

My dad used to cry when we would visit the graves of his parents, my dad used to cry every time when he went to the nursing home to see my mom who had dementia, he cried when my son was born. He cried when he found out he had brain cancer. He used to say he was soft. Some men do cry. My husband does. It isn't rare and there is nothing wrong or nefarious about it. 

Edited by libgirl2
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4 minutes ago, Bobcatkitten said:

I expect exaggerations in bio but to me this goes a bit further. Some are direct lies - not kissing someone in six years when you were living with someone in that time?

Again, how much of that is TPTB? Did they want to present their first GB as some a playboy? 

Edited by libgirl2
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6 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

My dad used to cry when we would visit the graves of his parents, my dad used to cry when he went to the nursing home to see my mom who had dementia, he cried when my son was born. He used to say he was soft. Some men do cry. My husband does. It isn't rare and there is nothing wrong or nefarious about it. 

Did I say it was wrong and nefarious?  All I said was my husband doesn't cry, (neither did my father or either of my brothers. )I don't think there's anything wrong or nefarious about them either, neither do I think they're  cold and unfeeling.   For that matter I rarely cry.  I'm just saying many people in our generation were told not to cry when we were children and we got used to stifling it.

So guys like Gerry who sob when they have to say goodbye to someone they've known a few days, are maybe not quite as common in our age group.

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1 hour ago, funnygirl said:

I don't understand what all the fuss is about. It's not surprising that Gerry had other relationships after his wife's passing, it's been years and also people seek comfort in their own ways. And it's not surprising that production would try to paint Gerry's dating history in a different light for maximum sympathy and to build the story around finding love again after such a loss. At the end of the day, he wasn't in love with those other women enough to want to permanently settle down with. And just because he's older doesn't mean he - or even the women that were on the show for him - weren't enticed by the limelight. 

I don't find this article scandalous nor do I think it changes much. It's reality tv. And everyone has a past. 

There are two things at play.  One is that ABC set him up as this poor, lonely widower who hadn't kissed anyone since his wife passed.  It'd be one thing if this were only an ABC-driven narrative, but Gerry has played his part in the narrative as well.  And the lies put him directly at odds with the notion that Gerry is supposed to be better than the other bachelors who most people are more cynical about.

For various reasons (his age, his ability to emotionally connect with the women), people bought into it and are now feeling foolish for having done so. 

Overall, though, I agree with you that the fact that he l lied about dating since his wife passed doesn't really bother me since I found it hard to believe to begin with and already suspected the dishonest narrative.

But the details of how he allegedly behaved in the relationship described in the article are just bad.  Period.  That part does bother me. 

And some of the women have hinted a bit that what they learned about Gerry made them glad they weren't picked.  It could be bitterness or maybe they know more. I'm curious if they'll start to get more specific going forward.

1 hour ago, LennieBriscoe said:

I'll come back after the show, because I've  gotten the impression that the last couple pages alluding to Social Media are essentially Spoilers, at least regarding Gerry. 🤔 Just me? 🤷‍♀️

It's about an article talking about Gerry's life immediately after his wife died which doesn't align with the story ABC tried to tell.  Those really aren't spoilers for tonight.

Edited by Irlandesa
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8 minutes ago, JudyObscure said:

Did I say it was wrong and nefarious?  All I said was my husband doesn't cry, (neither did my father or either of my brothers. )I don't think there's anything wrong or nefarious about them either, neither do I think they're  cold and unfeeling.   For that matter I rarely cry.  I'm just saying many people in our generation were told not to cry when we were children and we got used to stifling it.

So guys like Gerry who sob when they have to say goodbye to someone they've known a few days, are maybe not quite as common in our age group.

Well, I'm sorry but I felt that it was implied that there is something wrong with men who cried. I apologize. 

I think people (myself included) are forgetting this is a reality TV show. None of our lives will be directly impacted by any of this. It is entertainment. 

Edited by libgirl2
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My dad was a crier.  He was also a very vibrant, outgoing, gregarious guy.  He looked more like a boxer than anything else.  A cross between James Gandolfini and Robert DeNiro.

So yes, men cry.

But this whole narrative of poor me, my dear Toni, I don't know what to do, I'm so out of practice, my daughters really wanted me to get out there, boo hoo, boo hoo.

It's all a pack of lies, and ABC either didn't do their homework, or twisted the narrative, or a combo.

I'd love for this Carolyn woman to come forward.  A surprise appearance by her would be just the drama we all want.

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Maybe it's an age thing? My husband never cried when he was young, but he does now. Gerry's crying never bothered me, although it was a bit melodramatic at times. I think people are going to be pissed about his lying though. I think parts of that article are probably true, but we have to take it with a grain of salt. We are only hearing one person's account, and that is from an anonymous source. I'm sure he embellished his resume and faked the born again virgin drama, but that isn't so horrible. He didn't do anything criminal. If he just admitted it, it wouldn't have been a big deal.

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20 hours ago, DEL901 said:

I think, given this article, Theresa would be the worse choice for him.  Leslie is insecure and twice divorced.  She reallllly wants it to work.  Theresa had a long happy marriage and likely wouldn’t hesitate to bounce him on his ass if he didn’t treat her right…..because given how she gained her career…self taught middle aged lady beats out the young MBAs….she has a lot of confidence and intelligence.  She is happy with her current life and wouldn’t stick around if she saw any red flags.  

How do we know that she isn't as dishonest as him?

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3 hours ago, libgirl2 said:

Again, how much of that is TPTB? Did they want to present their first GB as some a playboy? 

Probably not.  In which case you get a GB who isn't a playboy, or one who has a past that aligns with what you want to present.  And if there simply isn't anyone, then just don't do the show.  But don't lie about stuff that can easily be found out.

3 hours ago, JudyObscure said:

So guys like Gerry who sob when they have to say goodbye to someone they've known a few days, are maybe not quite as common in our age group.

I'll tell you, though.  This show does some crazy shit to people's heads.  The stress is off the charts, and then there's the manipulation by the producers.  I can only imagine how I'd react, which is why I'd never go on a show like this.  Maybe the first season, or the second.  But after that?  You've. Been. Warned.

And I try to cut people a little slack, knowing what a pressure cooker they're in, but then again, they put themselves out there for my entertainment.  If they make an informed decision, then they can just live with the fallout.  If they make an uninformed decision, the they're idiots and they can live with the fallout, too.

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3 minutes ago, Quickbeam said:

Entertainment Tonight said all the women and the producers knew Gerry’s actual dating history. 

 

1 minute ago, Armchair Critic said:

Color me skeptical

 

1 minute ago, Quickbeam said:

Me too! 

I’m sure they did know… after reading the same article we did.

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6 hours ago, funnygirl said:

I don't understand what all the fuss is about. It's not surprising that Gerry had other relationships after his wife's passing, it's been years and also people seek comfort in their own ways. And it's not surprising that production would try to paint Gerry's dating history in a different light for maximum sympathy and to build the story around finding love again after such a loss. At the end of the day, he wasn't in love with those other women enough to want to permanently settle down with. And just because he's older doesn't mean he - or even the women that were on the show for him - weren't enticed by the limelight. 

I don't find this article scandalous nor do I think it changes much. It's reality tv. And everyone has a past. 

I agree with you. I terms of pre-Bachelor scandals (and there’s at least one every season), this one is pretty mild. There’s always a scorned ex that comes out of the woodwork. We’re only hearing her side. I’m sure Gerry has a completely different explanation on why he didn’t bring her to the reunion and why they broke up. Hell, my husband and I pay for ourselves when we go out to dinner, so I don’t see a problem with this. If she’s living in the household, she should contribute to the expenses.

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West-coaster here. So I'll say this and sign off until tomorrow so I won't be spoiled. But maybe, just maybe, Gerry wasn't critical of her weight, but something else and she inferred it to be her weight. Or maybe she was wearing something that because of the weight, didn't fit well.

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Am I a bad person because I'm making snarky comments in response to some of the things coming out of Gerry's mouth tonight?  I mean, I'm talking back to my TV screen, and it isn't pretty....

Edited by adhoc
clarity
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He is wearing a hoodie to their romantic final date?

And Theresa is going to love hearing how he kept her around because she was the “safe” choice…. Even though he claims the overnight date changed his feelings.  

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I think Gerry should pick Robyn from Sister Wives. They can (fake) cry all the time together. And it will be fun to watch them battle to make everything about them.

And yes, Theresa, he said "I love you" to Leslie. He said "I love you" to most of the women, the sound guy, and a chair.

Edited by JeanJean
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17 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

If she’s living in the household, she should contribute to the expenses.

Maybe she did but maybe he was expecting her to contribute more that he should have.

Also, it's one thing to pay for meals separately, but it's a dick move to ask for someone's share of the bill and then pretend that you paid the whole bill.

 

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Theresa really seemed to be giving him an out there—if it’s not me 1000% don’t pick me. He agrees he wouldn’t give her a ring if it’s not 1000%. I’m thinking he might choose her but not get engaged. But let’s se how things go with Leslie…

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I didn't tolerate men lying to me or trying to play me in my teens or twenties -- there's no way as a senior woman  I wouldn't kick this guy to the curb the moment his dishonesty was exposed. If you don't have trust, you don't have anything.

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Theresa also wears those shorty short shorts. I have tried to wear mine over the past….. decade lol, but legs just arent the same as my hay days, and those flapping upper knees! And I was as skinny as she is! Skinny does not mean you can still wear shorty shorts and look good. Old ladies in super shorty shorts is crazy!

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I think Gerry is wearing the outfit we’ve seen him crying in! I think he’s either going to dump Leslie now or the date goes so well, he’s not going to be able to choose tomorrow.

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OMG, Faith, what an Eeyore.  She spent the whole season obsessing over Gerry talking or not talking to her or looking at her, and now she keeps moaning about Gerry 'not being the same.'  (I think it's because he's chosen Theresa.)

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18 minutes ago, adhoc said:

Since they kept mentioning this week how something surprising happens on the show, I assume the whole thing tonight is taped.

I assumed they were referencing what happened in Costa Rica since this ep is supposed to be live.   

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Okay, Leslie got production to take stills from the film—or they took it upon themselves to give Leslie an edge.

EtA: or to make it more dramatic when he dumps her. I think Leslie knows it’s not her. Gerry’s face is saying the same.

Edited by JenE4
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