S12.E10: The Horny Hungarians

[TattleTeeny]

His WHORISH friendship and SLUTTY joining.

[njbchlover]

6 hours ago, sheshark said:

Melissa may have done something, but Antonia now looks unrecognizable on Mel's Instagram.  She is very pretty but nothing like we saw last night.

Maybe she got a Sweet 16 rhinoplasty?  It's pretty common around here (NJ).

[heatherchandler]

On 4/5/2022 at 7:33 PM, chick binewski said:

 

Also, did Mel say they were renting that house?

They rent their house, they cannot afford to buy another house while they renovate that old bee-hive-brimmed house.  
 

On 4/5/2022 at 7:44 PM, Emmeline said:

I enjoy Jackie’s and Jennifer’s children.  Melissa and Tre, not so much.  Melissa want to have boys that are football players and a daughter who is in cheer.  The popular kids.
 

She’s pushing her homely daughter to be something she’s not because she wants her to be a petite pretty girl in cheer and she’s just not.  And she doesn’t even want to cheer.  
 

And the boys throwing the football around didn’t impress me with their skills. 
 

9 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

 

Speaking of Melissa, that throwback pic of her in her teens is startling. She was one ugly girl. She has had ALOT of work done. 

 

For sure, and she’s totally unrecognizable.

 

6 hours ago, sheshark said:

Melissa may have done something, but Antonia now looks unrecognizable on Mel's Instagram.  She is very pretty but nothing like we saw last night.

Melissa filters the f—k out of the insta photos.  

[goofygirl]

5 hours ago, Chatty Cake said:

 

Last week when I called her Tikis whore, people were offended. This week I gave her an upgrade and still get called out. Fine.

Trashi is the whore who banged Tiki when he was still married to his pregnant wife. A gold digging piece of shit trash box whore that trots out her shy very young daughter to get her some more camera time.

No!Tell us how you REALLY feel!!

[Hedgehog2022]

On 4/5/2022 at 8:44 PM, Emmeline said:

I enjoy Jackie’s and Jennifer’s children.  Melissa and Tre, not so much.  Melissa want to have boys that are football players and a daughter who is in cheer.  The popular kids.

When Marge is on my screen I just can’t stop looking at her mouth.

Melissa seems to be pushing her daughter hard to go back to cheer when it is apparent to everyone else she clearly seems to not want to. The constant badgering from Melissa is just awful. Leave the kid alone...maybe she's tired of it and wants to move on. Maybe she feels she may not make the cheer squad (or is it team?) and wants to do something else...maybe this is Melissa's dream and not Antonia's. Whatever the reason, Melissa pushing her to do something and comparing all of this to her struggles as a teenager isn't going to help Antonia. The worst was Melissa sitting there watching the poor kid do her strength training and commenting constantly...she should have stayed in the car and read something on her cellphone for the hour or so Antonia was in there. And...everytime we see the boys they are tossing a football around...hmmm...looks mommy and daddy want to make sure they get there two football power house pre teens on the TV for future coaches to see. We see you Melissa and Joe... we see you.

[Hiyo]

Quote

Trashi is the whore who banged Tiki

Was he a client of hers?

Quote

Well, wow (and yikes a little bit too). But if it means that much to you, then I guess carry on with this very important mission? (But again no “whore” label for Tiki?)

"Fetch" is going to happen, dammit!

[Hiyo]

Quote

His WHORISH friendship and SLUTTY joining.

But does he dress like a prostitute?

[Chatty Cake]

6 hours ago, heatherchandler said:They rent their house, they cannot afford to buy another house while they renovate that old bee-hive-brimmed house.  
 

She’s pushing her homely daughter to be something she’s not because she wants her to be a petite pretty girl in cheer and she’s just not.  And she doesn’t even want to cheer.  
 

And the boys throwing the football around didn’t impress me with their skills. 
 

For sure, and she’s totally unrecognizable.

 

Melissa filters the f—k out of the insta photos.  

I feel a bit bad for Antonia. She could be depressed or she could just be a teen that is at a new school and doesn’t want to be on camera. Her cousins seem to enjoy it but they have each other.  It doesn’t seem like Tres kids are friendly with her anymore. 

[MaggieG]

I was with Frank, why would Bill have to apologize to Joe G?

I love the little clip of Nonno making squid at 6:00 AM, I had forgotten about that.

[Dirtybubble]

7 hours ago, MaggieG said:

I was with Frank, why would Bill have to apologize to Joe G?

Can we just make Frank a housewife?  I just ❤️ him so much!

[sATL]

why did Jackie have to go from zero to Ice cream? what about Yogurt? Sherbet? Gelato? Most ice cream places do have a sugar free and/or dairy free option that is healthier... then the therapist suggested pizza - what happened to baby steps ?

for the outing to be her 1st time - the kids were awfully good.. no comments  - like look at mom, wow mom, way to go, etc

Edited April 8, 2022 by sATL

[chediavolo]

On 4/4/2022 at 7:54 PM, TheCouchPotato said:

Teresa needs to just stop with the filters and plastic surgery…

 

As ugly on the outside as she is on the inside

[lightninggirl]

I'm still aghast at the horrible hair extensions in this series. My god.

I feel for Jackie. I used to be anorexic 30 years ago and was fortunately able to recover. Now I track my macros in an app and it's very difficult for me not to beat myself up or feel bummed for the rest of the day once I go over a macro category. 💔  It's a really difficult mindset to get past, even when you're decades recovered.

I'm now at the point where I am only here for JoeGo's clash with Bill; otherwise, I don't want to see a single Gorga on my screen ever again. God, they're insufferable. That being said, I appreciate JoeGo verbalizing to Bill "You hurt me." That was very self-aware of him and making himself vulnerable like that was something we don't see often with him.

I was surprised to see an Hermès throw blanket on Tre's sofa. I'm impressed! She's so gaudy and gross that I was surprised to see something slightly classy in her home. 😂

Margaret and Marge Sr. looked wonderful at her party. It looked like a great time with all of the food and I thought it was a great celebration of Marge Sr. My mom didn't want me to throw her a party for her 75th and I was really bummed, so all of it made me really happy for Marge Sr. I was a little confused at the dress as Jackie and Dolores looked like they were going to a backyard BBQ, and Jennifer looked like she belonged at a tea/garden party. I see that Dolores' Sno Caps candies made an appearance again in the front of her dress. 🙄  I'm also here for Frank and Marge Sr.'s vibe - their smiling and fun flirting is just adorable. ❤️

[chediavolo]

13 hours ago, sATL said:

why did Jackie have to go from zero to Ice cream? what about Yogurt? Sherbet? Gelato? Most ice cream places do have a sugar free and/or dairy free option that is healthier... then the therapist suggested pizza - what happened to baby steps ?

for the outing to be her 1st time - the kids were awfully good.. now comments  - like look at mom, wow mom, way to go, etc

The therapist does not seem too knowledgeable. I have a friend with anorexia & hopefully all this was taken out of context because..😳

[Dirtybubble]

10 hours ago, lightninggirl said:

Margaret and Marge Sr. looked wonderful at her party. It looked like a great time with all of the food and I thought it was a great celebration of Marge Sr. My mom didn't want me to throw her a party for her 75th and I was really bummed, so all of it made me really happy for Marge Sr. I was a little confused at the dress as Jackie and Dolores looked like they were going to a backyard BBQ, and Jennifer looked like she belonged at a tea/garden party. I see that Dolores' Sno Caps candies made an appearance again in the front of her dress. 🙄  I'm also here for Frank and Marge Sr.'s vibe - their smiling and fun flirting is just adorable. ❤️

I know a lot of people don't like Marge but I still do and I got such a kick out of this episode!  I LOVED Marge Sr. 75th bday party, it looked like so much fun and it was nice to see everyone getting along and having a good time together.  LOL'ing at Bill picking Marge Sr. up!  

I gotta say it was kinda nice without Teresa there

[heatherchandler]

11 hours ago, lightninggirl said:

 

I was surprised to see an Hermès throw blanket on Tre's sofa. I'm impressed! She's so gaudy and gross that I was surprised to see something slightly classy in her home. 😂

Margaret and Marge Sr. looked wonderful at her party. It looked like a great time with all of the food and I thought it was a great celebration of Marge Sr. My mom didn't want me to throw her a party for her 75th and I was really bummed, so all of it made me really happy for Marge Sr. I was a little confused at the dress as Jackie and Dolores looked like they were going to a backyard BBQ, and Jennifer looked like she belonged at a tea/garden party. I see that Dolores' Sno Caps candies made an appearance again in the front of her dress. 🙄  I'm also here for Frank and Marge Sr.'s vibe - their smiling and fun flirting is just adorable. ❤️

 

I am going to have to disagree with you there.. I think putting out a blanket with a designer logo is gaudy and gross.  I like nice blankets and I pay a lot for them but I would die before actually laying out a Hermes throw.  

I am sure she got the idea from Danielle, she had a whole rack of them on display at her house with Marty a few seasons ago.

Am I the only person who thinks the Marges don't look great with all of the work done?  

[sATL]

On 4/7/2022 at 9:00 AM, MaggieG said:

I love the little clip of Nonno making squid at 6:00 AM, I had forgotten about that.

yep. he definitely had some memorable moments..

And the board had a great discussion about that cook:  was it a  squid vs. octopus. I guess that is the beauty of living near the ocean - get those "products" in such a fresh-visual manner.. one just can't run to the nearest Kroger and get a 5lb squid to put in a pot...

for once I didn't object to all of the flashback clips. I think I will miss Tre's house too - surprised Miliana took the packing  so well.

And it was nice to come full circle on the venure - what 10+ years later since Joey's christening ? I wonder how much does it cost to hold an event in a venue like that - the staff, decor, food, and the rental...If the place is still standing after all of this time it must be affordable to those who are not on TV.. I would be like Marge Sr - as it would too take me 75 years to get there on my dime..

Edited April 8, 2022 by sATL

[BrindaWalsh]

2 hours ago, sATL said:

yep. he definitely had some memorable moments..

And the board had a great discussion about that cook:  was it a  squid vs. octopus. I guess that is the beauty of living near the ocean - get those "products" in such a fresh-visual manner.. one just can't run to the nearest Kroger and get a 5lb squid to put in a pot...

for once I didn't object to all of the flashback clips. I think I will miss Tre's house too - surprised Miliana took the packing  so well.

And it was nice to come full circle on the venure - what 10+ years later since Joey's christening ? I wonder how much does it cost to hold an event in a venue like that - the staff, decor, food, and the rental...If the place is still standing after all of this time it must be affordable to those who are not on TV.. I would be like Marge Sr - as it would too take me 75 years to get there on my dime..

I would guess around somewhere around 175 a head.  A wedding reception at the manor probably runs you between 225-300 a head, depending on time of year, day of the week and package selection and experience and food add-ons. That would include full cocktail hour with open bar, a 3 course dinner and dessert options beyond the cake.  It would also include full staff, including people assigned to just the bride and groom (need somebody to hold you champagne while you give a hug? Gotta pee but can't find a friend to hold your dress? Somebody is discreetly at your side that you don't even notice until you need someone).  It would not include music, florals or any other extras.  Price goes up if you have the ceremony on site.  Pricing for other events vary based on your preferences, but do cost less than the wedding packages.   Event venues like the Manor are common in Northern NJ (the manor, the rockleigh, Florentine gardens, etc.) and also popular for proms, sweet 16s, big parties like this one and the baptism, school fundraisers, etc.  They have all been around forever, and hold multiple events a night because they have so many different spaces.  

Some might wonder why I didn't mention the Brownstone.  The Manor is considered much nicer than the Brownstone.  But same purpose.  The Brownstone is really just kind of average in the "event venue" world of NJ.  Not that it doesn't do a wonderful job, it does, but it isn't at the same level as some of the other spaces. Plus it is on a seriously shitty neighborhood in Paterson.  

[Duke2801]

On 4/6/2022 at 6:38 PM, Chatty Cake said:

What an asshole. I just knew she loves every moment of her “eating disorder”

Yes I’m sure she LOVES having a disorder that can kill her. How fun to obsessively count calories, exercise incessantly in spite of injuries, and despise how you look in the mirror.

Good times indeed. 
 

 

[Chatty Cake]

1 hour ago, Duke2801 said:

Yes I’m sure she LOVES having a disorder that can kill her. How fun to obsessively count calories, exercise incessantly in spite of injuries, and despise how you look in the mirror.

Good times indeed. 
 

 

If all that’s true then she should go into treatment instead of selfishly staying on the show for reality fame.

[eleanorofaquitaine]

Wow, the judgment towards Jackie for having an eating disorder and dealing with it is really... something. And somehow I suspect if Jackie were BFFs with Teresa, we would be hearing all about her bravery. (FWIW, I like the way she is approaching what is obviously a decades-long problem for her).

It was nice to see Jen getting along with the ladies beyond Teresa and I particularly liked her recognition that she and Marge have more in common than she initially thought. Knowing what we know now, I think a lot of her antipathy towards Margaret is misplaced anger towards Bill and his affair. Glad she's dealing with it - and Bill - directly. She's a lot more likeable when she's being more than just the perfect wife and Teresa's attack animal. 

Edited April 9, 2022 by eleanorofaquitaine

[Marley]

I don’t care who Jackie is friends with I just think it’s gross for her to exploit her kids feelings about the eating disorder and just have it all out there for everyone to see. Not everything has to be filmed. I also think she’s fooling herself in these episodes. Maybe she isn’t now but I think she was in the beginning.

Edited April 9, 2022 by Marley

[eleanorofaquitaine]

It's weird to me to worry about Jackie's kids feelings and not, you know, Jackie's feelings herself. She has a life-threatening mental disorder. Maybe this is the best way for her to address the disease she is struggling with. It may not be the way you or I would deal with it, but it may be the best way for her to deal with it. And as I said, given that she's the one with the disease, I prefer to focus on her feelings, not her kids'. YMMV, of course. 

[Baltimore Betty]

2 hours ago, eleanorofaquitaine said:

if Jackie were BFFs with Teresa, we would be hearing all about her bravery

Maybe Teresa would give Jackie her ugly, "Strong," necklace (you know the one that Jennifer's brother's jewelry store did NOT make), the HW's chipped in for as a post jail gift.

[BrindaWalsh]

On 4/9/2022 at 5:15 PM, Marley said:

I don’t care who Jackie is friends with I just think it’s gross for her to exploit her kids feelings about the eating disorder and just have it all out there for everyone to see. Not everything has to be filmed. I also think she’s fooling herself in these episodes. Maybe she isn’t now but I think she was in the beginning.

To be fair, I think that's possibly part of the process.  

Case in point, the ice cream.  We saw her take a couple of bites.  We saw her give her kids a few bites.  She said to the therapist that she probably didn't eat more than half the cup.  Honestly, she was probably being generous in that estimation.  Then take into account that her kids ate some too, she ate even less.  But the reality is that as she learns how to take just ONE bite of ice cream, 4 bites of ice cream, half a cup of ice cream, etc. and sees that her world DOESN'T come crumbling down around her, the recovery will seem and feel more real.  

As for the kids, I don't know what to think.  On the one hand she's said that she wants to shield them from it and has tried to even though Evan has said that they have always noticed that she eats differently from everybody else and have asked questions.  She also filmed scenes with her father, with her two younger ones there, talking about her eating disorder (in the past tense), so it's not like they didn't know that it existed - even if they were too young to understand what it really means.  So I guess she's tried and failed to shield them from the present day, not necessarily the past? 

From my standpoint, the vitriol towards Jackie just doesn't make sense.  Why? People don't like her because she was a fan of the show before she came on?  She comes off as too confident?  She dared to cross Tre? (ding ding ding)  She has an eating disorder?  She isn't as honest as some people have pointed out?  She's hypocritical at times?  Because she doesn't believe that her husband cheated on her?  Because her hair frizzes in the NJ summer humidity and she wears too much light wash denim?  Because she can be smug?  Sorry but that's not a reason to fire her and with the exception of the eating disorder, you could literally apply those statements towards any one of those housewives, trading in and out a few words (labels vs. light wash denim).  It's also not a reason/justification for the level of hatred thrown towards her.  

Edited April 11, 2022 by BrindaWalsh

[BrindaWalsh]

Nothing to see here...

Edited April 11, 2022 by BrindaWalsh

[Castina]

I don't hate Jackie and I believe she has a long term eating disorder.  
But the cynic in me thinks this is a story this season that somehow evolved from the cheating rumours last season.  
To me the ice cream scene was contrived. If this plot line actually helps people then it's worth it in the end but I still find the whole thing contrived.

[Chatty Cake]

Jackie is so scared of Evan being truly outed that she revived the eating disorder storyline. It’s just looks so stupid, her sitting with her kids pretending to eat some ice cream all the while making stupid comments. She’s the parent and she was acting like a complete idiot. 

[Duke2801]

3 hours ago, Castina said:

I don't hate Jackie and I believe she has a long term eating disorder.  
But the cynic in me thinks this is a story this season that somehow evolved from the cheating rumours last season.  
To me the ice cream scene was contrived. If this plot line actually helps people then it's worth it in the end but I still find the whole thing contrived.

I think most of the “scenes” we see with the women are contrived. 

[TattleTeeny]

Quote

Some might wonder why I didn't mention the Brownstone.  The Manor is considered much nicer than the Brownstone.  But same purpose.  The Brownstone is really just kind of average in the "event venue" world of NJ.  Not that it doesn't do a wonderful job, it does, but it isn't at the same level as some of the other spaces. Plus it is on a seriously shitty neighborhood in Paterson.  

I think the Brownstone is far more aesthetically pleasing than that Manor (and its neighborhood seems fine/"normal" to me?). Ha, I had 2 weddings/receptions in the same day at the Brownstone once -- the first was in the afternoon, which finished up just as I had to go to the cocktail hour of the second one. Pretty sure the staff thought my date and I were crashers.

Edited April 12, 2022 by TattleTeeny

[sATL]

10 minutes ago, TattleTeeny said:

I think the Brownstone is far more aesthetically pleasing than that Manor (and its neighborhood seems fine/"normal" to me?). Ha, I had 2 weddings/receptions in the same day at the Brownstone once -- the first was in the afternoon, which finished up just as I had to go to the cocktail hour of the second one. Pretty sure the staff thought my date and I were crashers.

Is it still owned by the Manzo family ?

[TattleTeeny]

I don't even know -- that was a while back. And, to clarify regarding aesthetics, I meant more the layout and I guess architecture style than the decor itself. I don't recall the latter being notably horrific or anything, but it was fairly standard Jersey event hall-style, so make of that what you will...

Edited April 12, 2022 by TattleTeeny

[Fig Newton]

On 4/11/2022 at 5:28 PM, Castina said:

I don't hate Jackie and I believe she has a long term eating disorder.  
But the cynic in me thinks this is a story this season that somehow evolved from the cheating rumours last season.  
To me the ice cream scene was contrived. If this plot line actually helps people then it's worth it in the end but I still find the whole thing contrived.

Here I am , agreeing with you 100%. 

For starters, Jackie has an eating disorder-no doubt about it ! I am glad she is in treatment and I wish her well as she has a big, big mountain to climb.  I can not comprehend (I myself am a therapist but do not work with eating disorders) that if she is in reputable treatment where her focus would be management and recovery, would her treatment team seriously not advise she not tape this shit show? Her story line this year IS important and CAN help people. However, it does not help HER to be filming a show seen on TV as that shifts her focus and it now becomes a "story". 

I realize we don't see most of the therapy session therefore do not know what was discussed. But, I am pretty sure being on a relatively stupid reality TV show is not part of the program for such a serious, serious illness. 

And I don't give a shit about Evan and if he cheated. But Jackie needs to LET IT GO. Ok fine, he didn't cheat. Great. Move on. But, we know he did. Well, I believe that anyway, don't give a shit one way or the other!!

[eleanorofaquitaine]

On 4/11/2022 at 5:28 PM, Castina said:

I don't hate Jackie and I believe she has a long term eating disorder.  
But the cynic in me thinks this is a story this season that somehow evolved from the cheating rumours last season.  
To me the ice cream scene was contrived. If this plot line actually helps people then it's worth it in the end but I still find the whole thing contrived.

Well, Jackie said in this last episode that fighting with Teresa exacerbated her eating issues last year, so yes? It's odd to me that some people have this read on Jackie's actions whereby her admitting that she was upset about the Evan rumors somehow "proves" she's not being authentic (about her eating disorder or anything else).

 

2 hours ago, Fig Newton said:

For starters, Jackie has an eating disorder-no doubt about it ! I am glad she is in treatment and I wish her well as she has a big, big mountain to climb.  I can not comprehend (I myself am a therapist but do not work with eating disorders) that if she is in reputable treatment where her focus would be management and recovery, would her treatment team seriously not advise she not tape this shit show? Her story line this year IS important and CAN help people. However, it does not help HER to be filming a show seen on TV as that shifts her focus and it now becomes a "story". 

I realize we don't see most of the therapy session therefore do not know what was discussed. But, I am pretty sure being on a relatively stupid reality TV show is not part of the program for such a serious, serious illness. 

But you realize that her program can't force Jackie to do anything, right? My sense is that some assume that mental health professionals just order people to do something to address whatever issue they are dealing and the clients just do it - and that's not how it works.

Jackie told Evan (and the audience) that the program wanted her to go in for inpatient treatment. Likely her therapist doesn't believe that being on a television show like this is good for her recovery. But Jackie's an adult - they can't force her into inpatient treatment or off the show. All they can do is work with her within the parameters that she's comfortable. Quite honestly, it would not be a good thing for her if they said "my way or the highway."

Anyway, in my view, it's really harmful to impose expectations on anyone who is dealing with this kind of disorder. Just because it isn't the way you or I would deal with doesn't mean that judgment should be applied to the person who is dealing with it. And the reason why it's harmful is because if you are a person on this board struggling with an eating disorder reading all of this judgment against Jackie, you are more likely to keep it hidden for fear that you yourself may be judged.

[SoCal4Us]

^ I understand what you're saying about being or not being judgmental, but still have a hard time not judging Jackie's behavior by the same standards as the rest of the housewives.  For myself, I find Jackie extremely boring so I fast forward through most of her scenes. I did see the one where she mentions that Teresa triggers her (relating it to her eating disorder, I think?).  Jackie came across as manipulative, to me anyway, which shouldn't be surprising since other disorders and addictions likely involve an attempt to manipulate others. I of course don't know and am not a doctor - just my opinion from watching that scene in particular.

[eleanorofaquitaine]

To be sure, I think Jackie can be controlling (which is not surprising for someone with anorexia because a lot of time, anorexia is about control). And it's not like I don't think there aren't reasons to be critical of Jackie. But when it comes to her eating disorder, I just don't understand most of the criticisms being directed at her because she's willing to talk about it and open up about her recovery process. 

[Stats Queen]

4 minutes ago, eleanorofaquitaine said:

To be sure, I think Jackie can be controlling (which is not surprising for someone with anorexia because a lot of time, anorexia is about control). And it's not like I don't think there aren't reasons to be critical of Jackie. But when it comes to her eating disorder, I just don't understand most of the criticisms being directed at her because she's willing to talk about it and open up about her recovery process. 

I totally agree. Her eating disorder is very real. I, too, don’t understand the criticisms of her using this as a story line. Even if she is using this as a story line iine still doesn’t make her ED any less real.

As you so eloquently discussed above, it is complex. Her being on a reality TV show in a delicate place in her recovery is really probably the  last place she should be and she dismissed recommendations that she get inpatient treatment. Eating disorders are incredibly serious and incredibly hard to overcome (or manage).

I knew absolutely nothing about eating disorders until I was on a board of a non profit that works with getting people with EDs into inpatient treatment and lifetime treatment plans.

I was in charge of research (I am an organizational psychologist with a strong background in data, research and statistics) and it was eye opening. 

[BrindaWalsh]

13 hours ago, SoCal4Us said:

^ I understand what you're saying about being or not being judgmental, but still have a hard time not judging Jackie's behavior by the same standards as the rest of the housewives.  For myself, I find Jackie extremely boring so I fast forward through most of her scenes. I did see the one where she mentions that Teresa triggers her (relating it to her eating disorder, I think?).  Jackie came across as manipulative, to me anyway, which shouldn't be surprising since other disorders and addictions likely involve an attempt to manipulate others. I of course don't know and am not a doctor - just my opinion from watching that scene in particular.

She didn't say that Teresa triggers her specifically.  She said that the situation last year and all the arguing with somebody in her friend (Tre) caused her so much stress that she stopped eating.  It's a slight nuance, but it's there.  \

Honestly, it doesn't matter what WE think about the trigger itself, whether or not it is valid, etc.  Teresa has said "come for me and I'll come back 15 times harder" or something along those lines, and that's what she did last year, it was relentless.  And people react to different things, and nobody gets to say what's upsetting or stressful to another person.  If the situation upset Jackie and tipped her over that tightrope, then that's what did it.  Why people so insistent that it's not "enough" to do that, I don't know.  But just as people sat there and said it was shit for Dolores to sit there and say that Jen's tears weren't warranted, it's equally shit to say that Jackie's emotions aren't warranted.  

I think they are all manipulative to a certain extent.  Jackie has manipulated plenty.  So has Marge, Tre, Jen, Melissa, etc.  These women are on RHONJ for a reason and it's not just for their regularly scheduled botox appointments.  So yes, you can judge Jackie's behavior by the same standards as the rest of the housewives, but that doesn't equate taking away from a legitimate struggle.  

 

[Fig Newton]

20 hours ago, eleanorofaquitaine said:

Well, Jackie said in this last episode that fighting with Teresa exacerbated her eating issues last year, so yes? It's odd to me that some people have this read on Jackie's actions whereby her admitting that she was upset about the Evan rumors somehow "proves" she's not being authentic (about her eating disorder or anything else).

 

But you realize that her program can't force Jackie to do anything, right? My sense is that some assume that mental health professionals just order people to do something to address whatever issue they are dealing and the clients just do it - and that's not how it works.

Jackie told Evan (and the audience) that the program wanted her to go in for inpatient treatment. Likely her therapist doesn't believe that being on a television show like this is good for her recovery. But Jackie's an adult - they can't force her into inpatient treatment or off the show. All they can do is work with her within the parameters that she's comfortable. Quite honestly, it would not be a good thing for her if they said "my way or the highway."

Anyway, in my view, it's really harmful to impose expectations on anyone who is dealing with this kind of disorder. Just because it isn't the way you or I would deal with doesn't mean that judgment should be applied to the person who is dealing with it. And the reason why it's harmful is because if you are a person on this board struggling with an eating disorder reading all of this judgment against Jackie, you are more likely to keep it hidden for fear that you yourself may be judged.

Well, I don't mean to come across as judgmental or insensitive. I acknowledged that she has a very real eating disorder. Nor am I imposing my expectations. However, I do work in the mental health field and am more than aware that she can not be forced into inpatient treatment.....YET. 

However, let's be real. Jackie IS on a reality TV show that is broadcast in public. SHE is choosing to put her ED and her life under the eye of viewers. Therefore, she is going to be judged just as the rest of the cast is judged. Bottom line, in my opinion, Jackie has very clearly made a decision about treatment. She chose not to go inpatient, against suggestions from the professionals but did choose to stay on TV, to be filmed, to be judged, to be discussed, to be viewed and to ultimately NOT do what is best for her in the realm of treatment.  And that's fine - her decision. But watching the scenes with her family and the ice cream was really difficult. Her children are living with this every day, all day and watch their mother suffer. And their mother chooses to remain on TV. Yeah, I am judging that part of. 100%,  

[DeeplyShallow]

2 hours ago, Fig Newton said:

Well, I don't mean to come across as judgmental or insensitive. I acknowledged that she has a very real eating disorder. Nor am I imposing my expectations. However, I do work in the mental health field and am more than aware that she can not be forced into inpatient treatment.....YET. 

However, let's be real. Jackie IS on a reality TV show that is broadcast in public. SHE is choosing to put her ED and her life under the eye of viewers. Therefore, she is going to be judged just as the rest of the cast is judged. Bottom line, in my opinion, Jackie has very clearly made a decision about treatment. She chose not to go inpatient, against suggestions from the professionals but did choose to stay on TV, to be filmed, to be judged, to be discussed, to be viewed and to ultimately NOT do what is best for her in the realm of treatment.  And that's fine - her decision. But watching the scenes with her family and the ice cream was really difficult. Her children are living with this every day, all day and watch their mother suffer. And their mother chooses to remain on TV. Yeah, I am judging that part of. 100%,  

Judging her decision to be on the show and how she is on the show is part of the game and we all judge these women for a million things. There’s a difference, though, between what you’re saying and what other posters have routinely done- which is to deny the ED altogether in a vicious way.

As someone who is also in the MH field and who has specialized in ED, I saw red flags the second she mentioned the recommendations from Renfrew and decided only to go to weekly individual therapy. Her excuses about her kids were an easy out. A highly reputable treatment center will not recommend inpatient without a compelling reason and that means she was in a serious bad way with her Anorexia and she was not actually ready to do the work. Evan should have been more insistent. He’s supportive but gets a big side eye from me because he’s an enabler and too passive.

[Baltimore Betty]

4 minutes ago, DeeplyShallow said:

Evan should have been more insistent. He’s supportive but gets a big side eye from me because he’s an enabler and too passive.

He may have caretakers fatigue, I can only assume that he has been down the ED treatment road a few times with Jackie and he might not have the same level of energy for this round.

[eleanorofaquitaine]

Yeah, agreed, DeeplyShallow (re your first paragraph). It's one thing to say, "I can't believe Jackie is staying on the show." It's another thing to say, "what kind of reputable program would allow her to stay on the show?" That's basically an indirect way of accusing her of lying because it implies that a "reputable program" would not "allow" her to stay on the show and therefore, the fact that she's on the show means she's not involved with a reputable program. 

My personal feeling is that yeah, it's not healthy for her to be while in recovery. But I can also see with someone like Jackie that relinquishing control is very difficult. Even without the show, I imagine she would have refused inpatient treatment because it would mean she'd be giving up too much control of her life. There is a part of me that wonders if she won't benefit by having this all play out on the show because it requires her to see it, rather than hide it and requires her to be accountable. But I don't think most people would benefit by going through such treatment while on a reality TV program. 

Edited April 19, 2022 by eleanorofaquitaine

[RealHousewife]

On 4/6/2022 at 12:53 PM, bichonblitz said:

I know this is an UO but I think Marge is beautiful. Her eyes are stunning. Is she wearing a wig because her hair is on point all the time now and I remember her hair being a thin, scraggly, pigtailed mess in the past. 

I agree. Marge inherited her mom's beauty, and her blue eyes are breathtaking. 

Regarding what Marge and Melissa say about their parents, I actually get it. I love both my parents to death, and I did NOT have the best childhood. Family is complicated. 

 

On 4/5/2022 at 9:39 PM, Marley said:

Frank always makes me laugh.

Me too. 

On 4/6/2022 at 12:53 PM, bichonblitz said:

I also thought Frank was nice when he pulled Bill aside and wanted to make sure they were ok. I usually hate Frank with a passion but he was sweet in that moment. 

I thought that was sweet of Frank as well. I like how kind he is to Bill.

On 4/6/2022 at 6:17 PM, ichbin said:

Well, Frank is a neanderthal, but he's an educated neanderthal. He was a practicing, licensed attorney at one point.  Joe G's charm and bravado have their limitations.

At least you give Joe a credit for charm. I know he takes all the sex comments too far, but he really is charming and funny much of the time. 

On 4/7/2022 at 3:10 PM, Dirtybubble said:

Can we just make Frank a housewife?  I just ❤️ him so much!

I know Frank has issues, but I have a bit of a crush. He is handsome, smarter than you'd first suspect him to be based on his appearance, fun, funny, and pretty kindhearted. It's too bad he messed things up with Dolores, because she has so much going for her as well, and they made a stunning couple. I see why they were called Barbie and Ken when they were together.