S04.E10: Secret Cell Mates

[PrincessPurrsALot]

Rachel makes a shocking discovery about Doug; Daonte faces Nicolle's ex; Lisa's ex-con brother interrogates Stan; Jeff uncovers Anissa's secret and a wild brawl breaks out; Josh gives Courtney a romantic surprise; Britney's confession stuns her dad.

It is the last episode of the regular season.  We'll roll right into "Life After Lockup"; same bat time, same bat channel starting next week. 

For now, the only thing that would be shocking about Doug is if we learned he was a kind and rational person who has been focusing on doing good things for others.  Anything horrible will not be shocking.  Perhaps Rachel can have herself a long cry on the bench to remember crime victims?  

Which one of Nicolle's exes will Daonte face?  Much larger than Daonte stoner dude, Zakk?  Prison bae with the unfortunate tattoos, Tia?  Will others surface?  At least Nicolle Jr. hasn't cheated on him, unless she's been getting some action in the dishwasher with the wooden spoon. 

Lisa's brother is an ex-con.  Her son is facing jail time.  She has been a guest of the state more than she has been a free woman.  The family that does time together stays together. I would feel sorry for Stan, but having met him . . . have at him, Lisa's family of miscreants. 

Will Josh's romantic surprise include finally having sex with her again?  Will it occur to either of them that his libido may have decreased while his depression increases?  Will he shower her with pickles? 

Original air date 2021.08.20

[anoninrva]

I'm hoping people watch the episode first - not sure how this forum deals with spoilers.  But it was hilarious envisioning some poor soul running across the burnt remains of Nichole Jr.    

Edited August 21, 2021 by anoninrva

[PrincessPurrsALot]

I was correct that Josh's romantic surprise involved pickles.  I know a pickle lover when I see one. 😁

Stan is even more foolish than I originally thought. Please, let me show you everything worth stealing in my home.  I'm surprised he didn't write down all of his passwords and bank account info.   I am much too happy that Muskrat Stan and Medusa haired Lisa will be on Life After Lockup.  

Jeff chasing Kyle needed Bennie Hill music with it.  What a clown. 

 

[Adeejay]

I cried when I saw that Dougie Jr. is back living with Rachel. At least now he will have a shot at living a decent law abiding life. I couldn’t bear the  thought of him being with Doug’s family. Rachel, you are a good person with a great heart!

 

[SemiCharmedLife]

Wow!  This episode had a lot of drama!  It's too bad that Rachel had to discover what an a-hole Doug is, but hopefully she is away from that situation with nothing more than a broken heart.  It could have been worse.  I hope Dougie gets to stay with her.

The scene with Daonte and his friend (Derrick?) was crazy.  A viking funeral for Nicolle Jr!  I have to believe that production came up with that- the mini casket and all.

Jeff is bonkers, especially the scene showing him breaking apart a huge wooden beam.  I died.  Then, when he walked back in the house, we got a nice shot of at least 5 Amazon boxes on the porch!

Can Stan be anymore naive?  He tells Lisa where he keeps his checks and then takes her brother on a tour of his collectibles.  This, after telling us that her family is a bunch of criminals.

 

[lasandi]

OMG did you all notice how out of breath Jeff was as he was declaring what he was going to do to Kyle.  All he had done at that point was run out to the yard and the thought of beating up Kyle made him breathless.  LOL  Good thing security was there and he knocked Kyle down with 1 punch cuz honestly I don't think he had another punch in him.  

[lasandi]

Lisa heading off Stan’s lot as soon as he gives her the keys 

 

[1011101010001]

Rachel was very smug when her mother warned her not to get involved with another inmate.  Hopefully it has sunk in now.  

[Keywestclubkid]

7 hours ago, Adeejay said:

I cried when I saw that Dougie Jr. is back living with Rachel. At least now he will have a shot at living a decent law abiding life. I couldn’t bear the  thought of him being with Doug’s family. Rachel, you are a good person with a great heart!

 

I think it’s because no one in his family wanted him (which is super sad and super lucky for him) with her being his legal stepmother she got to keep him or he would have been sent to foster care. 

[1011101010001]

Who knew dried cum was so combustible?

Rumor has it that the EPA ordered that waterway drained and declared a brownfield.

Is Nicolle’s “Honesty” tattoo ironic?

By the looks of that belly I think Jeff was a regular Little Debbie purchaser at the commissary.

[Pepper Mostly]

8 hours ago, SemiCharmedLife said:

Wow!  This episode had a lot of drama!  It's too bad that Rachel had to discover what an a-hole Doug is, but hopefully she is away from that situation with nothing more than a broken heart.  It could have been worse.  I hope Dougie gets to stay with her.

The scene with Daonte and his friend (Derrick?) was crazy.  A viking funeral for Nicolle Jr!  I have to believe that production came up with that- the mini casket and all.

Jeff is bonkers, especially the scene showing him breaking apart a huge wooden beam.  I died.  Then, when he walked back in the house, we got a nice shot of at least 5 Amazon boxes on the porch!

Can Stan be anymore naive?  He tells Lisa where he keeps his checks and then takes her brother on a tour of his collectibles.  This, after telling us that her family is a bunch of criminals.

 

Unless Doug gets locked up again for a good long time, she's in danger. Guaranteed he'll stalk her, harass her and make her life miserable. She also has his son. No way she'll ever be free of him. She is fucked. 

A custom made coffin for Nicole Junior. Do you supposed Derrick made it in his garage one Saturday? "Hey, neighbor, what you up to?" "oh, just making a sex toy casket. Pass me that hammer."

Does Stan have dementia or something? He invited Lisa's criminal family to his home? Have lunch at a restaurant! What is wrong with you? Though I'm sure Lisa insisted that he show his "trust" in her by having them over. He'll be cleaned out with a quickness. Hopefully he won't be smothered with a pillow. 

[Nuccganggang]

the best part of the episode was the 5’7, 130 lb security guy trying to contain jeff’s unhinged ass 🥴🤣 i think i spotted a tooth flying out of his mouth as he hooted and hollered, but the shot was far away so i can’t be sure. 

[sempervivum]

30 minutes ago, Pepper Mostly said:

Does Stan have dementia or something? He invited Lisa's criminal family to his home? Have lunch at a restaurant! What is wrong with you?

Stan PAY for a restaurant meal for the criminal clan?! Unless it leads directly to fun times in the sex dungeon, Stan's millions stay in the stock market as God intended! Lisa is flabby mess, but she does know her way around a sprayer of Mr. Clean and a sponge.

Did I miss it? We've been teased for weeks with previews of Daonte on a road at night, decked out in a red tuxedo, saying 'Is this what my life has come to' (or words to that effect). Did this ever happen?

Josh, Jeff and Doug all back in the slammer (did Doug ever surpass his 40 day record?) Not even one wedding of (her) dreams accomplished.

Rachel will probably spend the next 6 years (til he's 18) paying blackmail to Doug in order to keep Dougie with her. 

So bored with Brit/Marcellino coming back again; I'd much rather see Angela and whoever.

[StevieRocks]

1 hour ago, Nuccganggang said:

the best part of the episode was the 5’7, 130 lb security guy trying to contain jeff’s unhinged ass 🥴🤣 i think i spotted a tooth flying out of his mouth as he hooted and hollered, but the shot was far away so i can’t be sure. 

[Lambie]

The last scene of Rachel with her friend installing the security camera was the smartest thing I've ever seen on any reality show, never mind one that involves marriages with career felons.

I think she's still in for a world of misery by keeping Dougie Jr. Don't get me wrong, I love that she did, I love that he has a chance at a normal life with her, but Doug will always be part of her life and her cabinet may not be enough for him to rage out on when he realizes Dougie Jr has no use for him in his life. 

 

[SevenCostanza]

3 hours ago, sempervivum said:

Did I miss it? We've been teased for weeks with previews of Daonte on a road at night, decked out in a red tuxedo, saying 'Is this what my life has come to' (or words to that effect). Did this ever happen?

That's from the next season that starts soon.  I have no desire to see most of the cast that are coming back, I hate Lacey and Shane, and Brittany/Marcelino put me to sleep.    But mixed in there will be more Lisa and Stan, Daonte and Nicole, and Ray and Britney.

 

[anoninrva]

6 hours ago, sempervivum said:

Rachel will probably spend the next 6 years (til he's 18) paying blackmail to Doug in order to keep Dougie with her. 

So bored with Brit/Marcellino coming back again; I'd much rather see Angela and whoever.

I honestly don't get the impression that any other adult around Dougie Jr cares enough to fight for him.  The blurb about the adoption was the highlight of this episode to me.  My first reaction to the cheating/cabinet destruction scene was "poor Dougie Jr".  He's going to have an uphill battle not to end up like a waste of oxygen like his dad.

Britney + Sr. Amor, I don't know.  I don't hate them.  Her mom, yes.  Still haven't quite processed the wtf birthday cake smash.

[HorrrGoodnight]

"You're a handsome gentleman yourself" FTW 😂

[1011101010001]

2 minutes ago, SlutAssBitchAssHor said:

"You're a handsome gentleman yourself" FTW 😂

She kinda looked like if Brandon from 90 Days got face tats.

Edited August 21, 2021 by MrBuhBye

[Back Atcha]

8 hours ago, sempervivum said:

Stan's millions stay in the stock market as God intended!

I don't think you give Lisa's Criminal Clan enough credit.  Now she knows where his checks are...has already researched the value of his baseball cards and other collectibles.  It will be fairly easy for someone to hack into his stock accounts and do whatever needs to be done.

[bichonblitz]

I can't believe Muskrat Stan told Lisa he had more checks in his bedroom. The old man is insane!

Then we have Lisa's brother acting all like the big protector of his poor, abused sister. I think the rough bitch can handle herself. Your sister is a felon and can't be trusted for a minute, asshole!

Rachel has a good heart. I hope she really has learned her lesson this time and stays away from the prisoners.

Edited August 22, 2021 by bichonblitz

[1011101010001]

1 hour ago, bichonblitz said:

I can't believe Muskrat Stan told Lisa he had more checks in his bedroom. The old man is insane!

Then we have Lisa's brother acting all like the big protector of his poor, abused sister. I think the rough bitch can handle herself. Your sister is a felon and can't be trusted for a minute, asshole!

Rachel has a good heart. I hope she really has learned her lesson this time and stays away from the prisoners.

Is it a St. Louis thing to still use checks?  Even Anissa in bumble has plastic.

[SemiCharmedLife]

13 hours ago, MrBuhBye said:

Who knew dried cum was so combustible?

Rumor has it that the EPA ordered that waterway drained and declared a brownfield.

Is Nicolle’s “Honesty” tattoo ironic?

By the looks of that belly I think Jeff was a regular Little Debbie purchaser at the commissary.

C'mon, now, we know Daonte used the dishwasher frequently...

[1011101010001]

28 minutes ago, SemiCharmedLife said:

C'mon, now, we know Daonte used the dishwasher frequently...

I figured there was a farewell in the car.

[Auntie Anxiety]

14 hours ago, MrBuhBye said:

By the looks of that belly I think Jeff was a regular Little Debbie purchaser at the commissary.

Or he’s buying them via subscription on Amazon.

[Adeejay]

Stan said, “Lisa comes from a family of criminals, so I have to be careful.”  In the next breath, he tells her where he keeps his money and then proceeded to show her ex-con brother his most valuable possessions.  Unbelievable!

[1011101010001]

7 hours ago, Adeejay said:

Stan said, “Lisa comes from a family of criminals, so I have to be careful.”  In the next breath, he tells her where he keeps his money and then proceeded to show her ex-con brother his most valuable possessions.  Unbelievable!

Stan must come from a family of criminals as well as he is basically paying for sex.

[JenE4]

In the ultimate hypocrisy, Nicolle has “Honesty” and “Loyalty” tattoos up each arm! I guess that’s one way to throw people off the track. But then she thwarts herself by putting her date on social media. Oh, so close!

Stan doesn’t have $5000 liquid to buy a used car?! Hmmm. He’s saying $13,000 now, but he said last week that’s the total and she’s going to make payments. Having $2M in a 401(K) and stocks is not a lot of money for retirement (depending where you live). He has a basic retirement account. He’s not independently wealthy.

Jeff, I’m guessing Anissa changed her password so you’ll stop ordering drones and Gucci pants from Amazon. “Sexy” photos?!? Oh, my! Anissa! Well, this is a twist! It’s always the parolee who’s cheating!

Speaking of which… Daonte’s “radar is up.” Sir, your radar should be in code red!

Not surprised that Doug punched the cabinet off, but I am somewhat surprised that he’s been cheating all along, as he seemed happy to be getting married. The lifelong criminal couldn’t be trusted?! I guess I should have seen that coming!

A ring in a pickle jar! Ha!

You know Daonte is coming back.

Jeff is pacing like an angry tiger in a cage. And there he pounces!

Brittany has some high expectations. What kind of business is Ray going to run?

Show the guy who cooks the best meth your valuable collectibles. Great plan. Especially since Lisa’s already been googling the value of everything. And godmother says she’s doing a good job getting money from him?! Yikes!

Jeff snapping the 4x4! bwhahaha!

RIP Nicolle Jr. A Viking funeral!! This is awesome! Lol!

Rachel losing her mind over bologna. I’m glad she at least got Dougie jr out of it.

Half of them are back in prison—blowing their chances for Life After Lockup—at least this season.

 

[Nuccganggang]

14 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

I think the rough bitch can handle herself. 

this made me gasp for air bc i am laughing so hard 🤣 i’m not sure what i love more, this awful show or coming here to read this amazing commentary! random question, has anyone else been having trouble with the audio during the show? mine keeps skipping in and out, and i can’t do live chat bc of it 🥺 

12 hours ago, MrBuhBye said:

Is it a St. Louis thing to still use checks?  Even Anissa in bumble has plastic.

it’s an old person thing. old people hate technology + their financial affairs

10 hours ago, MrBuhBye said:

I figured there was a farewell in the car.

if the chevy’s a rockin, don’t cum a knockin’!

[Nuccganggang]

daonte frantically fitting in one last romp before saying his final goodbyes to nicollllle jr:

[Pepper Mostly]

2 hours ago, Nuccganggang said:

 it’s an old person thing. old people hate technology + their financial affairs

As a certified Old Person I can assure you that I have not written a check for decades. As I like to say--"A check? How quaint! Maybe you'd like me to page you later, or send you a fax?"

 

[PrincessPurrsALot]

There is something about Stan that makes him seem much older in his mindset and actions. I'm not sure I believe he's 65 but I also don't think he's pushing 100.  But he uses phrasing and terminology that sounds like it came from an old school Pepperidge Farm ad.  "Hill of beans", "What's what", etc.  He also has the start of a waver to his voice.  So, even putting aside his muskrat Hitler hair choice, he seems stuck many a generation back.  It's not that older folks cannot or have not moved away from paper checks, but I can see Stan doing everything the older way.  Add in his inability to even make eggs and toast (I'm sure his wife did all of the cooking).  He is trapped in a time warp of his own choosing, yet he seems to think he should have a much younger girlfriend.  

[AZChristian]

5 minutes ago, PrincessPurrsALot said:

He is trapped in a time warp of his own choosing, yet he seems to think he should it's okay to spend his children's inheritance so he can have hire a much younger girlfriend.  

FIFY.  ;-)

[Auntie Anxiety]

Where did Stan work before he retired? Does anyone know what he “was?” Did he ever say? And do you think the toupees appeared before or after the wife died? These are the questions that plague me on a very rainy afternoon.

[1011101010001]

49 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

Where did Stan work before he retired? Does anyone know what he “was?” Did he ever say? And do you think the toupees appeared before or after the wife died? These are the questions that plague me on a very rainy afternoon.

I think he said his pension is 130k.  Because most private employers got rid of pensions years ago and that one is fairly large maybe he was a federal government employee (feds pay more than state and local).  Maybe some kind of middle management.

[Elizzikra]

18 minutes ago, MrBuhBye said:

I think he said his pension is 130k.  Because most private employers got rid of pensions years ago and that one is fairly large maybe he was a federal government employee (feds pay more than state and local).  Maybe some kind of middle management.

If Stan gets a pension of $130,000/year and has about $2 million in stocks, he's in good shape financially, especially if he owns his home outright with no mortgage.

Quote

Where did Stan work before he retired? Does anyone know what he “was?” Did he ever say? And do you think the toupees appeared before or after the wife died? These are the questions that plague me on a very rainy afternoon.

I'm betting after. I imagine that when his wife died, he started exercising and eating better and acquired the toupees so that he could charm the ladies...

[1011101010001]

Based on an internet search it appears he worked for the state at a fairly high level managing seven nursing homes for veterans.  His deceased wife was a nurse, which makes sense. 

[heatherchandler]

Well he should use some of that money to get his wig cleaned

 

[Elizzikra]

Quote

Well he should use some of that money to get his wig cleaned

How do you clean those things? Dry cleaner or salon?

[Scout Finch]

Because the camera panned to the autographed baseball when Stan and Lisa's brother first sat down I half-expected that afterward it would pan back to a now-empty spot!

I guess I must have low expectations for this show because I was impressed that what seemed like the majority of the non-ex-cons only needed one go-around with their ex-con and when they said they were DONE, they actually did appear to be DONE. Especially Rachel, who I totally expected would make excuses and get burned a few more times. A punched-out cabinet door was all it took. The news that she has Dougie was the happiest ending of the season but that does mean that unfortunately Doug won't ever be completely out of her life. Probably not face to face, though, because he's unable to stay out of prison. Hey, Doug made it more than 40 days this time before he went back into the slammer! 

I can just see someone coming across this melted, flesh-colored blob along the river bank. Bleagh. 

Nicolle's response to Tia wondering if she really wants to be together was just SO decisive and reassuring. Basically, "Well, since he left, I'm here with you, aren't I?

Stan's checks may be safe because youngsters have no idea how to write out the amount on checks and instead of "four-hundred fifty and 99/100" it'll be "$450.99" and they'll think the reason you have to fill in the amount again right next to it is like confirming a password. I would think the bank would notice the incorrect format...or hope so, anyway. 

Edited August 23, 2021 by Scout Finch

[zenme]

On 8/21/2021 at 9:47 PM, MrBuhBye said:

Is it a St. Louis thing to still use checks?  Even Anissa in bumble has plastic.

No. Stan’s 100. It’s an old people thing.

[1011101010001]

8 hours ago, Scout Finch said:

unfortunately Doug won't ever be completely out of her life. Probably not face to face, though, because he's unable to stay out of prison

Maybe he is in a three strikes state and will end up in prison for life.  

[Keywestclubkid]

Hey now I still write checks for rent ... LOL 

[hookedontv]

On 8/21/2021 at 6:15 PM, MrBuhBye said:

She kinda looked like if Brandon from 90 Days got face tats.

Well, Tia has more balls than Brandon....

[Elizzikra]

Quote

Maybe he is in a three strikes state and will end up in prison for life.  

He does seem to enjoy riding a motorcycle without a helmet.

[hookedontv]

PS: I already deleted the episode so I can't take a photo, but how come no one is talking about Doug on the back of the motorcycle, with his mohawk hair flowing in the wind? I have never seen such a ridiculous thing in my life. I just about peed my pants. 

What a jackass. 

[Mahamid Frauded Me]

3 hours ago, hookedontv said:

PS: I already deleted the episode so I can't take a photo, but how come no one is talking about Doug on the back of the motorcycle, with his mohawk hair flowing in the wind? I have never seen such a ridiculous thing in my life. I just about peed my pants. 

What a jackass. 

Haha, I saw that too and was like what a douche

[SevenCostanza]

with his mohawk hair flowing in the wind?

Edited August 24, 2021 by SevenCostanza

[hookedontv]

42 minutes ago, SevenCostanza said:

with his mohawk hair flowing in the wind?

THAT'S IT!!!! Thank you so much @SevenCostanza  

[1011101010001]

1 hour ago, hookedontv said:

THAT'S IT!!!! Thank you so much @SevenCostanza  

Reminds me of those Maxell ads with the guy sitting In the chair with the wind from the speakers blowing his hair back.